Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 1, Episode 10 - Charter from Heaven, Charter from Hell? - full transcript

While Danny is away, the crew revels in his absence. And when Bryan confronts Jen, she finally stands up to him. Meanwhile, Tiffany's feelings for Ben increase, while Bobby continues to be ...

Previously on
"Below Deck Med"...

It's come to my attention

- that you may be
- taking pictures of guests

And then showing them

to other guests.

- There you go, man.
- Ohh...


I am gonna take your phone

- when we've got charter guests
- on board.


- "Primary charter guest
- is bringing on board

- A group
- "of her closest friends."

We got the Golden Girls.

- When you toast, you're
- supposed to look right...

- You're supposed
- to look in the eye,

- 'Cause otherwise, it's...
- Seven years of bad sex.

- Oh, are we gonna
- have sex now?


- [giggles]
- Mm-hmm.


I feel bad

that me and Hannah kissed

because my feelings

are stronger for Julia.

Fold this down,

and then this hand

folds this line back up...

Jen can't tie the knots

that are required

to do the basic jobs

of the deckhand position.

- I want you to do that
- ten times just now.

Ooh, sh...

- Kid needs to see a doctor

- We've got to get him
- off the boat.

I'm gonna medevac him.

[ship horn blares]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[lively music]

Danny's back up at 103.5

or so.

Ohh, f...

- So I'm gonna get him
- out of here.

- Okay.
- I'm gonna medevac him.

- Nothing that we're giving him
- is working.

- We need to get some
- professional medical attention

And medication.

- We're gonna need
- to send somebody with him.

- We're already down one
- in the deck department,

So that means we're gonna

have to lose a stew.

- At this point,
- Jen would probably

- Be our most expendable
- person.

- I think Bobby and I
- could be able to handle it,

- And if we need it, we can
- always rely on Tiff.

- Okay.
- Sounds good to me.

- Bobby and I
- can get the job done

Because we're the ones

that can handle the lines

- and know how to tie up
- a cleat.

- Okay. Let's go.
- Cool.

May I dine next to you?

Yes. Please.

It is - so gorgeous out.

All right, here we go.

[thumping hip-hop music]

Unfortunately, the crew's health

has nothing to do

with the success

of this charter.

The show must go on, baby.

Sorry. Would you like

some wine served with lunch?

- Okay.
- Can I have a cocktail instead?

- Yes. Of course.
- What would you like?

- A gin and tonic.
- White wine.

How about a martini?


♪ ♪

Hello. Hello.

Hey, you.

- How you doing?
- I'm great.

♪ ♪

- Do you want to let me know
- when you can

- Go through the menu
- with me, darling?


Could it possibly be

in the next half an hour?


Being coworkers

and not friends with Ben,

it takes away from the fun side

of the job,

but at the same time,

I feel like we almost need

to strip it back to, like,

the bare bones

and rebuild from here.

- Have a break, babe.
- Just chill.


Jen, Jen.

- Go for Jen.
- Jen, can you meet me

In the main salon?

Copy that.

Danny, - we got a boat coming

- That's gonna take you
- to Naxos.

- It's gonna get you
- admitted to a hospital

- And see what's going on
- with you,

Get some fluids in you.


Hey. Uh, Daniel's condition

isn't getting better.

- And he needs to go
- to the hospital.

Pack a bag. If it gets

really, really bad,

- if he does have to go
- to Athens,

- You're gonna be
- his little escort.

- And you will have to go
- with him as well.

I wouldn't worry - about that.

It's a little insulting

- that Bryan's sending me
- to a sickly hospital

To care for Danny.

This is bullsh...

This is grilled salmon

with sesame.

Perfect. Thank you.

This is, uh,

broccoli and wild rice.

- Mmm!
- Nice.

A chopped Greek salad

with avocado.

All: Mmm!

Chicken with balsamic

and truffle.

- Oh, my gosh.
- Nice.

- Ooh!
- Oh...

- I see a vessel
- approaching us

Off of our starboard quarter.

♪ ♪

- Try not to touch anything
- on your way out.

- Well, do we have a way
- to get ahold of you?

My cell phone.


♪ ♪

Take care, Danny.

Hope you feel better.

I'm concerned about Danny,

- just as I would be
- for any crew member.

We don't know what it is.

If it's contagious,

- he could pass it on
- to the entire boat,

- And then we'd be
- completely crew-less.

Well, that worked good.

- Yeah, and the guests
- don't even know about it.

- Yeah.
- That's very cool.

♪ ♪

Hannah, Hannah.

The jewelers are now here.

- I copy that.
- Thank you.

- I was thinking maybe
- we could set up

On these two tables.


[gentle upbeat music]

So when you're ready,

- we've got the jeweler
- set up downstairs for you.

- Okay.
- Okay. Great. Thank you.

- These ladies just want to do
- a bit of shopping.

And tomorrow, they want

a jeweler to come on

and, uh, bring a selection

of his, um, collection.

At this stage, usually I have

guests passed out everywhere.

It's literally

a dream come true.

- How you doin', ladies?
- Oh, my goodness.

Look at this.

Those are in Byzantine style.

[champagne cork pops]

- Take a peek...
- Whoo!



This is really pretty.

Very nice.

Sold, my friend.

I am terrible

at butter balls.

Can I try a butter ball?

Bobby will just ace it.

- I think he will.
- That's the sad thing.

- And then you'll
- fall in love.

- Really?
- [laughs]

- People have fallen in love
- for less, love.

- Are you kidding me?
- Men and women can be friends.

I don't know why we can't just

put it to rest already.

Relationships are fickle.

♪ ♪

[pebbles clattering]

♪ ♪

Aw, yeah.

[hands slap loudly]

- Oh!
- That was a good one.

- Oh, don't f...
- With my silver.

♪ ♪

- Oh, my gosh.
- Look at this.

- Isn't that beautiful?
- Beautiful.


It's so awesome.

Garlic and tomato,

black truffle, sprouts.

♪ ♪

Don't forget to look at me

- because I don't want
- the seven-year thing to happen.

[indistinct conversation

[and giggling]

- Yum!
- Whoo!


This is a filet Oscar

with crispy prosciutto.

I am going with the flow

over the wine...


- Over the waterfall.
- Oh, yeah.

- Is this trip
- better than traveling?

- Fist bumps.
- Crown.

Bump those crowns.

The primary

is a little bit sloshed.


Like, she can hardly talk.

Anybody with what

we're talking about, because...

It's like seeing my mum

at Christmas.


Hannah, we would love

to have the captain join us

for dessert.


- I mean captain.
- What did I say?

- You said captain.
- You did say captain.

I did.

The captain join us for...

I'm sorry.

The captain join us for dessert.


- I probably poured
- a little too much

Orange liqueur

into the margarita.

- Sometimes when I'm making drinks
- for guests,

I kind of forget

that they're not for me.

Mark, Mark, Hannah.

The guests have requested

- that you join them
- for dessert.

Are you free?


Lemon panna cotta

with lemon truffle custard,

lemon ice cream,

and a coconut and lemon cake.

- Yeah?
- Okay.

- So there's a bit
- of a theme going.



- Oh, my goodness.
- Thank you.

A lemon panna cotta...

- Hannah, the captain,
- is he coming?

- Yes, of course,
- he is coming.


He is, like, the man.

- That's right.

- You only live once.
- That's right.


- Hello, everybody.
- It is the captain.

- Good evening.
- Hi, Captain.

- Thank you so much
- for inviting me to join you.

We're so glad you could.

- We are so grateful
- to have you join us.

Captain Mark!

- This is amazing
- and incredible.

- I do enjoy chatting
- with the guests

And interacting with them

on a limited basis.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.



I try to keep it

professional as possible.

♪ ♪

- But, yeah, it's a little bit,
- let's say, awkward.

How was your day at work?

- Oh, God.
- It was amazing.

- I cleaned the whole house
- for you.

- Oh, did you?
- I did.

That's awesome.

- I made your bed
- in the master.


- I don't know what it is
- about Ben.

- I just want
- to take care of him.

He's a big old teddy bear.

- God. You really know
- how to spoil a guy.

I do.

- I normally
- go for younger guys,

But maybe that's why

the past relationships

have been failing.

- I just need a big diamond
- on this ring now.

- Excuse me?
- [mumbling]

So, Captain Mark,

tell us about your wife.


We just, um, had our

16th wedding anniversary.

- Ah.
- High five!

- Whoo!
- All right.

- How long have
- you been married?

[quirky tuba music]

Um... 16 years.



Is Mark

holding court?

- He is.
- He's loving it.

Making a few cracks and jokes,

farts and giggles.

[clears throat]

[giggles - and gags mockingly]

One second.

We're gonna be right back.

Excuse us just a minute.

Pardon us.

- Are you looking forward
- to the Jacuzzi?

- No, but...
- No, we're going

- To the restroom right now.
- Yeah.

- The service?
- Dessert?

- The... I think
- it was all good.

- Whatever, like...
- You enjoyed it?

- Yeah.
- Oh, good.

It was really good.

Did she just ask

how dinner was?

- Okay.
- All right...

At least these women

are super polite

when they get drunk,

as opposed to throwing

- bundles of
- hundred-euro bills at you

And demanding sex.

This is why I'm so grateful

I know how to hold

my alcohol.

♪ ♪

- Good night.
- Okay, good night, everybody.

I don't think

our primary charter guest

is very well.

- Okay?
- Mm-hmm.


Poor girl.

- My cocktails
- were super strong.

- Oh, really?
- I had no idea.

I didn't know

you had it in you.

♪ ♪

All crew, all crew...

♪ Oh, the best part

of waking up ♪

♪ Is Danny's not on the boat! ♪

That's so mean.


I hope Danny is okay,

but it is a lot quieter here

without him,

- mainly because the whole crew
- is not yelling at him.

- I'm gonna have that stuck
- in my head all day today.


♪ ♪

- Bobby, I'm sure you can see
- "Pegasus" coming up.

I don't see Danny.

♪ ♪

Coming up...

Here we go again.

- "All guests are
- used to partying hard...

- That they'll need a vacation
- "from this vacation."

I want to get in my bikini.

[grumbles and whines]

Bobby, I'm sure you can see
"Pegasus" coming up.

Copy that.

I don't see Danny.

Tell me.

- They're just saying he needs
- to rest for the next day.


Hey, Ben.

- Hey.
- Oh, whoa.

Is he okay?

- He has antibiotics,
- and they said that

He has to have bland foods

for the next few days.

All right,

I'll make him a curry.


I feel really bad because

I wanted to help out,

but I'm gonna be stuck

in my room.

♪ ♪

Hey, Jen.

Can you come down here?


- Uh, I was in the middle
- of something.

Watch me do this.

- In yachting, there's a right way
- to do something

And a wrong way to do something.

This wraps in, and in the back

of your left hand, push it up.

Is this sinking in?

Are you getting this, Jen?

I, like, never do this knot.

When Jen doesn't know

how to tie a knot,

her failure's my failure.

Hey, Jen.

Keep practicing.

- I want to see you
- improve on this.


What's your thoughts,

and how does tip work

when somebody's not here?

- Well, he didn't work at all,
- right?


But he also

had to endure an illness.

I mean, he didn't even try.

- I mean, if you're not here,
- and you're not working,

Probably shouldn't get tipped.

- So, yeah, I mean,
- you have a point.


Deck crew, let's raise

the anchor and get underway.

Copy that.

♪ ♪

This looks so good.

This is really good.

Orange juice is,

like, my hangover cure.


With three shots.


Are you okay?

All right, so there's been a bit

of a debate on the boat

as to whether you should get

your tip or not.

But as a friend and protector,

I reckon you should forfeit

your tip

before the meeting,

because that way you'll gain

the respect of your coworkers,


Just knowing that I may not be

able to send money home

is just, it's...

it's not good.

- I'm just,
- I'm coming to you as a friend.

- No, I appreciate that.
- Okay, cool.

Stay well.

[upbeat music]

I know, Cap'n,

I'm funny-looking, huh?



I recognize that,

this charter,

I have been very ill

- and that caused more work unto
- the crew members.


And I'd like to forfeit my tip

if there is any tip for me.

And pass that along

for the crew members.

- I will take that under
- advisement.

Okay, thanks, Captain.

[upbeat music]

- Deck crew,
- we're five minutes out.

Please stand by for docking.

- Okay, Captain,
- everyone's in position.

Lines are...

[indistinct] are out.

Okay, here we go.

Give him your line, Jen.

- Okay, Captain,
- we're nearly there.

- Bryan, what kind of traffic
- do we have

Over on our port quarter?

- Nothing over here
- on our port quarter.

You need to slack

Jen's number two.

Copy that.

Nice job, deck.

Good driving, Captain.

All crew, all crew.

Guests departing.

Main deck aft.

It was a pleasure meeting you.

Thank you guys so much.

- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.

My pleasure.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Everybody just did

an amazing job.

They catered to us

hand and foot.

- It was awesome.
- Oh, good.

- Well, thank you so...
- Oh, thank you so much.

- Something for you I think
- you'll find helpful.

- I'm sure you'll find something
- to do with that.


Thank you!

- Thank you so much.
- Safe travels.

- Thank you.
- Bye.

These women have definitely

been my favorite charter,

and I am so sad to see them walk

off that passerelle.

- I just want to grab them
- and bring them back

And keep them forever, honestly.

Well, that was... that was

the chillest charter ever.

Hell yeah.

- I want to keep them
- for the whole season.

I know.

- All crew,
- meet in the crew mess

For the post-charter meeting.

Thank you.

- Hello.
- Hey, Captain.

Hey, gang.


- I think we pretty much knocked
- that one out of the park.

And we did it a man down.

- I think that more helped
- than hindered.

So well done, everybody.

The moment of truth.

- Danny came to me,
- and he said that,

- Because he didn't participate
- actively in the charter,

'Cause he was sick,

he didn't expect the gratuity.

That's why this is divided

11 ways.

This is our biggest tip

that we've gotten so far.

$20,000 US.

[all exclaim]

18,000 euros.

1,630 euros each,

which is 1,800 US each.

- All right.
- Whoa.

Yes, very well done.

Very well done.

Awesome. Awesome.

[funky bass music]

Damn flies.

Are they in my f... purse?

How dare they?


[mockingly winces]

- You've got a lot
- of white hair.

- Where?
- I've got loads.

- Where?
- Let me see.

I see some fleas in here.

- Bobby.
- Are you done?

Oh, Bobby.

Have fun in the friend-zone pit.

Yes, I think I got him.

Innocent bloke.

Let's pick you up.




Bobby, that was my elbow.

Oh, no!

- Bobby's a flirt,
- and I'm a flirt,

But there's definitely not

anything serious.

Say sorry, f... er.


Sorry, f... er.

[upbeat music]

Hannah, Ben, and Bryan,

- can you come up
- to the bridge, please,

For preference list meeting?

Copy that, Cap'n.

Ben and I are on our way up.

Hey, Captain.

Hello, Ben.

Here we go again.

They will arrive before noon,

and this is going to be

a two-day charter.

So we have Jesse and Katie


Well, that would be two Ts,

so it's probably "Biter."

Hopefully they're not bitter.

Todd and Barbara Stainbrook.

That's an unfortunate name.

Michael and Savannah Mothner.

And then Cameron Johnson

and Elise Biel.

Notice that the guys

are all called co-primaries.

- I saw that.
- Yeah.

So they're all paying, right?

I guess so.

- This group has been friends
- for years

And share a mutual love

for business and excitement.

All guests are used to

five-star service

and expect that on this charter.

Night one, they have requested

a costume theme party

on the yacht.

Any ideas?

- Venetian themed party.
- Mm.

- Would be cool.
- That would be really cool.

- I've been through
- everything on the boat

At this stage of the season,

and I do know

we have Venetian costumes.

That's Venetian.

It smells like cheese.

- Everything smells of cheese
- to you.

It does!

- So that's at least
- one less thing to worry about.

Now, how are we doing

on the discussion of menus?

- There's a... was that a problem
- this last time around?

- No, I think
- we're getting there.


We're developing a system.

- I guess that's what
- I'm asking.

- An hour before service,
- right?

Yeah, you write down the menu

and give it us.

You come up to me

and write it down.

- I would prefer you to write it
- down and give it to us

An hour before service.

Aren't you're the one

that wants it?

- I'll come down and write it
- if you want to.

- I mean, it doesn't
- really matter.

- No.
- No, it's fine.

I'm going to appease Hannah

by delivering a menu

and then there's never

gonna be an issue.

With communication,

so not only

am I helping everyone,

- but I'm kind of
- covering myself too.

Okay, great, guys.

- Okay, thanks, Captain.
- Thanks, Cap'n.

Onward and upward.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Finally, I'm feeling better.

I'm ready to work.

I want to make my team proud.

- Danny, Danny?
- Mark.

Go for Danny.

Have you got something

for me?

Yeah, Captain,

I haven't forgotten.

Right before the charter.

15 sound good?

Danny, let's do it right now.

Copy that.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- You're a f... ing disrespectful
- little sh...

You disrespect everybody.

Don't you feel bad about that?

[mellow music]


♪ ♪

- Hey, Captain.
- Thank you much.

- Is it off?
- It's off.

- Kay, yeah, I was gonna say,
- make sure it's off,

- 'Cause it's not gonna get
- charged for a couple days.

Yeah, it's off,

but I do need it at nighttime

as it's my only alarm clock.

- We'll find you another one.
- Okay, sounds good.

- I really like
- having my phone on me.

Something cool may come up as

we're driving by on the yacht,

- and it's like, that would be
- great for Instagram.

But you know what?

If the captain wants my phone,

then the captain

shall have my phone.

Thank you.

So out of curiosity,

- like, do you have
- a good old-fashioned

English name, or...

Julia Louise d'Albert,

which is French descent,

from my mother's side.


D'Albert Pusey.


And the uneducated people

would say "Pussy."

- Well, it's a good job
- I'm educated.

Oh, there we go.

- And I speak French,
- so we're good.

There we go.

The first moment I met Ben,

I knew he was privately educated

- and from a very
- well-to-do family.

You know, it's obvious.

When I finished up

at Central Saint Martins,

I went to the south of France

- and learned French
- for three months.

So I cleaned the school,

and they gave me free lessons.



So is that why

you're such a good stew?

What do you mean?

Well, because

you're good at cleaning.

[both laughing]

That's a bit derogatory,



- Deroga...
- Deogra...

- How do you?
- Geography.




- Private school boys in England
- have their...

- They have an air about them
- of, um,

Self-righteousness, perhaps?


Geography, - geography.

[upbeat pop music]

All crew, all crew.

- Guests will be arriving
- in 20 minutes.

- Make sure you're in
- your whites, please.

♪ ♪

How're you doing, Daniel?

- What percentage level
- are you at?

Still getting there.

Probably 80, I'd say.

You still have your list?

- Let's just work on
- what you think

I think you need to work on.

- I think those
- are the big key points.

Hold on to that list.


Why would I have that?

- Because it's important
- for you to remember.

It's in my brain,

bro, I mean...

- I wanted you to keep
- that list.

- Let's just not talk anymore
- about it, all right?

We're done.

♪ ♪

It's hard to move forward

when we've crossed the path

so many times.

Just lay off of me.

Danny's a virus.

- He infects everyone,
- and, with me,

- He's turning me
- into something I'm not.

- You're getting your phone
- taken away.

- That's something that happens
- when you're ten.

Don't you feel bad about that?

- That's because you're a f...
- Disrespectful little sh...

- I don't appreciate that
- at all, man.

You disrespect the captain.

You disrespect him.

You disrespect everybody.

- If I talked the way that
- you talk to me to the captain,

I would be ashamed of myself.

Let's just work, okay?

Let's just work.

My job is to do my job.

Make everyone happy.

End of that.

But you're not doing your job,

- and you're not making
- anybody happy.

- Yeah, let's wait till the
- charter starts, all right?

He doesn't get it.

I think he needs to go.

- No, it's already cracking off
- downstairs.

Oh, man.

- I don't know how
- they can keep having

The f... ing same conversation

over and over.

Can we not all just f... ing work

and shut the f... up?

- You all right?
- Yeah, I'm good, man.

Come here.

What's up?

Nothing's up, man.


Bryan won't let up

with this whole list thing.

It's like, what the f..., dude?

We spoke about it.

You didn't even give me

an opportunity to apply.

- Obviously, they need to start
- working with you a bit

- And giving you a little bit
- of leeway

Where you're probably not

as effective as they want.

I think Danny needs to keep

his head down and do the work.

- Just see if you can
- avoid conflict.

- See, that's your challenge.
- I'm trying to do that.

- I know.
- I'm trying.

And he has to drop

his little ego.

That is how to regain

his respect.

What do you think you can do

to kind of appease it?

Just gonna work, smile...

Pretty much be fake.

I hate being fake.

I've learned from a lot of

the mistakes that I've done,

- but I can't get along
- with these guys.

- So if it's damn if I do,
- damn if I don't.

But no matter what,

I'm always going to work hard.

It's all fluff and bullsh...

[quirky hip-hop music]

All crew, all crew.

- Guests will be arriving
- in five minutes.

Copy that.

All right, guys, let's go.

We should totally

rent this yacht.

Don't you think?

Guys, we got to go.

Oh, okay.

Where's your radio, Daniel?

Right here.

Let's get ready for it, guys.

Let's get ready to rumble.


All: Hey! Hi!

Hello, I'm Mike.

- Hi, I'm Mark.
- Hey.

- Nice to meet you.
- Bryan. Nice to meet you.

- Mark Howard.
- Nice to meet you as well.

- That hat is ridiculously
- massive.

They look high-maintenance.

I'm missing the last

charter guests like crazy.

Welcome aboard, everybody.

- We're gonna be doing
- a fair amount of traveling,

Down to Paros,

and then up to Mykonos,

and then back.

We got good weather for it,

- and I think it's gonna be
- a great couple of days.

Thank you.

- Anything special
- that you'd like to do?

- If you think of something
- down the road, just tell us.

- Okay.
- [laughter]

Hannah is our chief stew,

- and she's gonna take you for a
- little introduction to the boat.

Remember when I almost

died on your boat?

- When I was...
- We're gonna listen to Hannah.

- Hey!
- We're gonna listen to Hannah.

So I'm gonna take you

on a tour of the boat,

- and then go through
- some safety stuff with you,

And then we can get underway.

- Okay.
- Terrific, thank you.

Let's start up here.

- Thank you, Hannah.
- Fire drill.

This is the sun deck up here.

- It's kind of a really nice place
- to come and chill out.

You've got the Jacuzzi,

which is always fun and nice.

About half an hour.

How long does it take

to drink a few drinks?

- So this is our
- bridge deck aft.

You guys will be having

the majority of your meals

out here.

- I haven't been on a vacation
- in two weeks.


- - So this is the formal
- dining room.

We can play beer pong here.


You ready to continue

the tour?

- Oh, wait, what's in there?
- What's in there?

[overlapping conversations]

- So enjoyable that you said it
- that way.


The tour usually takes me

about seven minutes.

- We're, like, an hour
- into this charter,

And I'm already so over it.

It's just like, I'm sorry,

but it's like bimbos are just

f... ing enjoy the boat.

- Kay, guys,
- so there's four cabins.

- So a few safety things
- really quickly...

Okay, you guys, no.

- Can we run
- to claim the next rooms?

No, no, no.

You're just gonna listen for two

minutes to safety information,

- and then you can run
- as much as you like.

Firstly, we've got life jackets,

- and if you hear
- any sort of alarms,

- You go straight
- to the muster station,

Which is the lower saloon.

- The mustard station?
- Muster.

- I'm just jumping off.
- Where you muster.

- Is that near
- the mimosa station?


I just need to maybe

take a Xanax or something

and try and get through

the next few days.

[hip-hop music]

Oh, this is not good.

- Why?
- Are they being dicks already?

- It's like,
- eight of the most ignorant,

Stupid Americans

are on our boat.

- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

Let's just stick together

and be cool with each other,

- and I think that'll help us
- get through it.

I agree.

- Bryan, Bryan, let me know
- when you're ready.

- Deck crew's ready to go.
- We're just standing by.

- Okay, let's start
- with the spring lines.

- Give him slack.
- Give him slack, Jen.

Aft-line spring is off.

Bow's off.

Okay, Captain,

all lines in, all lines in.

[motors whirring]

♪ We're leaving the port ♪

[energetic music]

♪ ♪


- There's Hannah.
- Hi.

- Where have you been?
- Did you take a nap?

- Yeah...
- Yes.

- Just anything.
- Okay.


What are you bringing us?

- Some straws.
- Oh, my gosh.

Finally, some straws.


More ice - and vodka.



How's it going, Jules?

[blows raspberry]

They're just a bit much.

- Okay, darling,
- so we're gonna do snacks.

Snacks, snacks, snacks.

And then lunch at 2:30,

quarter to 3:00.

- All right, awesome.
- Bring it.

- So how do we summon
- a bartender?

- There's got to be a bell
- or a button.

Can anybody do that whistle?

This is like a f... ing

frat house right now.

You think?

Thank you.

Where are you from, Tiffany?

Uh, Jupiter, Florida.

- Tiffany,
- can I get a short glass

- With a little Tito's
- and a little tonic?

Only a little of each?

Just a little.

All right.

Tiffany and these guys,

- they're getting on
- like a house on fire,

So you know, show your

hospitality skills, Tiff.

Go on.

- Thank you, Tiffany.
- Very welcome.

You're the best.

♪ ♪

Ready to go?

Little BLTs.


Where the hell have you been?

Preparing your food.

Oh, you worked so hard

on getting nachos.

She don't like my jokes.

- [laughing]
- No, they're hilarious.

- There are only so many times
- you can go...

[imitates laughing]

- Without, like, wanting to blow
- your brains out.

What are you doing, love?

- [screaming]
- Oh, my God!


Okay, that definitely...

You okay?

Okay, lie down.

Wait, I'm so glad

that happened to you.

- There's already girls
- falling off the countertops.

I'm so f... ed.

This is, like,

the cutest I've thing ever seen.

Wait, I want to...

I want to get in my bikini.

Do you want some water too?

No, come with me.

- You want help?
- Come with me.

- I'll help you up.
- Let's go.

- That's all right.
- [laughs]

- Ooh, careful.
- Slow, slow, slow.

- Ow!
- You're fine.

You're fine.

- Here's the problem
- with drunk guests,

Is that they take away

the crew's attention to us.

That's right.

- We just lost
- both our bartenders.

- Yeah.
- So selfish.

I have to get myself

another drink by myself.

You're the sweetest.

Aw, thank you.


I'm so f... ed up.

- There's no such thing
- as a Jen knot.

This is a safety thing.

- I'm not the best deckhand
- you've had,

- And you're not the best
- first mate I've had.

Pour Patron.

Shots on yachts.

More, more, more!

Are you bringing dessert?

- Uh, I'm gonna bring
- the main first.

Hannah, smile!

- You should just tattoo
- "dickhead" across your forehead.

She hates you.

[energetic music]

- Ben, 30 more minutes
- until we're anchoring.

All right.

♪ ♪

So these guys, right?

Are you already finding them


- I get their humor,
- so it's not as annoying for me.


- But, like, Hannah,
- she's, like, "What the f...?"

- "Wow."
- Yeah.

- You know when you're really
- hammered, right?

- And you think
- you're being funny.

I never get hammered-drunk.


♪ ♪

This is our room.

♪ ♪


Mine and Ben's relationship

is only just starting

to get into a good place again,

- so when the guests
- are passed out in their cabins,

Too drunk to eat,

- of course
- it's gonna be my fault.

Ben, please don't shoot

the messenger, okay?

- They've all gone to their cabins
- except one.

They could be getting changed,

or they could begin to pass out.

- I have a feeling
- it's probably passed out.


- It's almost worth it, isn't it?
- You know?

Paying 200 grand for a charter

and then going to bed.


After two hours.

Bryan, Bryan,

I'm going on break.

Copy that.

- Bryan, Bryan,
- we are ready to go.

Why don't you let go

three on port.

Copy that, three shots

on port dropping now.

[anchor whirring]

♪ ♪

Three shots out.

Let's lock that off.

[mellow bass music]

♪ ♪


♪ ♪

I really want my phone back.

I'd love to pictures to say,

"Wow, I was here,"

- and if you don't have the
- pictures in this day and age,

You haven't done it.

Hey, Bryan?

I know it's a long shot,

but since everyone's still down,

and I'm still kind of on break,

I don't know if I can...

- What are you asking?
- Sorry.

Check those caves out.

Oh, on a Jet Ski.


If you're cool with that.


♪ ♪

- Where the f...
- Do you think you are?

- Club Med?
- No.

[percussive hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

Permission to ask about menu.

So it's two courses,

- so write,
- "Two courses," okay?

"Two courses."

- That could be
- a good thing to do.


So first course will be beef

tartare with mustard aioli.

Second course is Alaskan crab

couscous with sun-dried tomato

and almond,

with local baby cod.

Thank you.


♪ ♪

- Hi, there.
- How are you?

- Can I get you a drink
- of anything?

Yeah, that'd be great.

- Yeah?
- What would you like?

- I'll do a Tito's and tonic
- with a lime.

- With tonic and lime?
- Yeah. Brilliant.

Are you kidding me?

This guy's just literally

slept off his hangover

He's, like, the superhero

of Alcoholics Anonymous.


I love you and miss you

and hope you come out.


No, they're dead.

You don't understand.

- Hey.
- Hello.


- Yeah, I think Elise
- is, like, 30%.

Savannah's, like, negative 30%.

- Benny.
- Yes?

We're down two for dinner.

- Is that right?
- Yes.

- When guests change their mind
- last-minute,

Obviously it's gonna affect me.

So we're doing six now.


All right, after you.


I like.

Dude, this is gorgeous.

- All right, this is my name
- right here.

Guys, once I put this on,

I'm super sexy,

and you won't know who I am.


Hey, how're you doing?

I'm good, how are you?

I don't know, we look good.

You guys look awesome.

So what exactly

is the theme, officially?

- What are we...
- It's Venetian theme.

Well, the Venetians actually

came in and settled in Naxos,

- which is the island
- we left from.

- Really?
- Oh.

- I love it.
- When in Rome.

So, guys, would you like

white and rosé with dinner?

Just vodka for me.

Okay, sure.


- More!
- More! More!

Pour Patron.

Shots on yachts.

Hannah, smile!

I'm smiling.

Okay, cool.

♪ ♪

So this is a beef tartare

with caviar.

Let's have a shot.

Could we have a vodka?

♪ ♪

How goes it, my lady?

These guests are being

just disgusting.

♪ ♪

Are you bringing dessert?

Uh, I'm gonna bring

the main first.

Oh, she looked at you like...

- "Um, I'm sorry,
- that's not the main."

- Basically,
- you should just tattoo

- "Dickhead" across your forehead
- and get it over with.

You look like a drunk judge.

There are drunk judges.

Thank God that they're getting

off the boat tomorrow.

He's so drunk.

I know, it's just...

It's disgusting.

- How was the fish?
- Are you all done?

Yeah, we're all done.

- Fish was great.
- You can take all that.

- But, tequila. Pour.
- Of course, yes.

- Carry on.
- Thank you.

She definitely hates you.

Tomorrow's our last day.

- Do you think your wife will see
- the end of the charter?


- You know what, we may just
- have to extend this.


Look what I got, Jen.

Can I finish this?

Yeah, as soon as you can

tie a bowline three times.

Your brain needs to be molded.

- I'm not in the mood
- to tie knots.

- This is just
- basic, basic, basic.

- For someone who's been in
- the industry for seven years...

You just don't like

the way my knots are.

- No, Jen,
- your knots don't exist.

- There's no such thing
- as a Jen knot.

[dramatic orchestral music]

Uh, Ben, you never know

what they might order, still.

Yeah, that's why I should

probably go to bed

and then get up, right?


'Cause I'm pretty f... ing

these guys are gonna give me

the runaround a lot.

I'm not here to be a dick,

- but I want you to do
- the bowline.

Show me right now.

Any idiot can tie a bowline

if they just read the book

on knots for five minutes.

- I'm surprised
- to hear you say that,

- 'Cause you always say, "Oh,"
- I know how to tie a bowline,

- "I know how to tie a bowline."
- I've never...

- And then you get put
- to the spot and you can't do it.

- I'm not the best
- deckhand you've had,

- And you're not the best
- first mate I've had.

- The concern we're having right
- now is some of the group

Is not necessarily

getting along with Hannah.

- Vulgar, they're disgusting,
- they're rude.

- You want to stick Tiffany
- and Julia more in front of them?


I'm not the best
deckhand you've had,

- and you're not the best
- first mate I've had.

That's fine... at the end

of the day, you work for me.

I'm over him.

I just want him off my ass.

Can't you let me help you?

I like to do things on my own.

- It's just my method.
- Okay.

- I will learn
- the exact knot that you want

And do it that way from now on.

That sounds good, - thank you.





♪ ShotsOnYachts.

Oh, God,

they're getting naked.

They should have

drinking Jenga.

- Bryan will not leave me alone
- about knots.

F... you.

I don't care if he meant it in,

like, a harmless way,

it sounds dick.

- You know, anyone can know about
- lines if you read a book

On 100 knots for,

like, 50 minutes.

I hate him.

[upbeat instrumental music]

♪ ♪

Captain Mark, - Captain Mark.

Go ahead, Bryan.

- Let us know, and we're ready
- to start pulling anchor.

Go ahead and start.

[anchor whirring]

Anchor in the pocket.

Thank you.

- Oh, man, you know what Daniel
- asked me, he was like,

"So I was thinking maybe"

can I use the Jet Skis

"to go and explore?"

- I was like, "F...
- Absolutely not."

- He should've just been fired
- a long time ago.

- Right.
- We should've,

- 'Cause we could've avoided
- all of this drama

- If we would've
- just pinged him out

At the very beginning.

He's toxic.

Hey, Jen, have you, uh,

spoken to Bryan at all?

Yeah, I spoke to him.

- He was like,
- "All right, let's do knots,"

- And I was like,
- "I don't want to do knots."

- I don't want to be asked
- questions.

Well, then you told him.

- So what did he say
- when you told him off, though?

"I understand your opinion,

but I'm still your boss."

- Bitch, you were never my boss.
- [laughs]

And then I got annoying Jen.

- Oh, she's annoying
- the sh... out of me.

- She thinks...
- She's a know-it-all.

You don't even know

how to tie two knots.

She's got a sh... y attitude.

- She, you know, she gave me sh...
- Last night.

- She goes, "Bryan, you know,"
- I just want you to know

- I think you're being
- "really mean."

Like, I'm the nicest

first mate I've ever met.

Like, when you talk to him,

- it's like talking
- to just a f... ing wall.

Oh, yeah.

- I'm at that point where
- I can't really say nothing,

So I'm just gonna do my job.

My work has to speak for itself.

- That's so cool you told him off,
- though.

- That's legit.
- I respect that.


[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

What are you kids up to?

- Hello.
- Hi.


Pop quiz: Where are we?



- Are we still on for
- a 10:00 breakfast, do you think?

- Yeah.
- Who's not up?

Them two are not up.

What do you mean them two?

- Those two.
- Okay. Cool.

Those two.

It's Ben's manner and his tone

sometimes that I feel

he's very belittling,

very condescending,

and very dismissive.

All right, that couple.

It's gonna be amazing,

- 'cause they've been down there
- awhile.


Why don't we just throw out

the waffles and bacon now.


- And then we'll do
- the omelets,

We'll say Ben's got some nice

omelets on the way as well.


If you have 90 minutes of

prep, it better be pretty good.

- The more we complain
- about the service,

The faster we'll get stuff.

Here we go.


I've got some waffles for you.

90 minutes of prep

for waffles.

Some crispy bacon.


- Ben's just preparing
- an omelet for you.

One omelet for all of us?

- Yeah, he's gonna make
- just one.



Sorry for your 90-minute wait,

we have waffles.

How long is it gonna be before

she gets back here?

- Oh, let's get Hannah
- to come back.

She's kryptonite.

It's just not even funny.

I'm like, ugh.

Vodka and grapefruit juice.

Must be fresh.

Is there a problem with it?

- There's just
- lots of seeds in it.

- Oh, do you want me
- to strain it out for you?

'Cause I can if you want.

Oh, yeah, that'd be awesome.


Strain it.

This is exactly what

I was talking about.

I thought I heard it all,

but this is new to me.

All the seeds in it,

because it's fresh juice.

I've never met so many

knob rashes in my life.

What's it got in it?

Feta, mushroom, tomato,

and broccoli.

There you go.

- Thank you so much.
- You're welcome.

- Oh!
- Oh!

[cheers and applause]


And I've got a bit of

fanciness to that.


Can I get you anything else?

Are you good for the moment?

- Just for... I'm gonna need
- another one before too long.

Anyone else? All good?

You got to anticipate

the drink's gonna take a while,

and order your next drink before

you finished your first drink.


Can they not see

I'm right in front of them?

That is just rude.

Are we ready to drop now?

Yep, ready now.

[chain rattling]

- Kay, it looks good to me
- for now.

Looking good, feeling good.


Do you remember

where the captain's...

Is it...

It's the next one, right?


- Captain?
- Yes?

Can we come in?


So, um, there's an opportunity

for us to stay longer.


So Katie and I have decided

that that's what

we prefer to do.

Okay, great.

Stay here tonight in Mykonos.

Okay, perfect.

- Tomorrow, we want to go
- to Santorini.


That's a pretty good hike.


Let me work it out.

All right.

Let me see what we can do.

- Also, since we're gonna be
- here longer,

- The concern we're having
- right now is some of the group

Is not necessarily getting

along with Hannah too well.

[dramatic music]

The concern we're having right
now is some of the group

is not necessarily getting along

with Hannah too well.

- So if... Tiffany?
- Mm-hmm.

Could perhaps have a little

more face time with us,

that'd be better.


- Cool.
- Thanks, Captain.

- Appreciate it.
- Sounds good.

Both: Thank you.

- Bryan, Bryan, can you meet me
- in the bridge, please?

Okay, copy that.

Uh, Hannah and Ben, I need you

guys up here as well.

So Jesse just came up to me

and said that they're extending

their charter for two nights.

- What?
- Oh, wow.

Are you f... ing serious?

The idea is to stay tonight

in Mykonos,

- and then travel
- all the way to Santorini,

- At which time the guests
- will be departing

At 1:00 in the morning.

Wild, huh?

Are you excited?

You look excited.



So that's it.

All right, - thanks, Captain.

So, Hannah.

I think they've

kind of perceived

- that you're not real happy
- with their presence

And their behavior.

In my five years in yachting,

I've never had anyone go to

the captain about my service.

You know that we have done,

what, seven charters now,

and every guest has always said,

- "She's always smiling,
- it doesn't matter what time."

That's me as a person.

That's me as a chief stew.

I can only be pushed so far.

- To be honest,
- they're vulgar,

- They're disgusting,
- they're rude.

I'm kind of disappointed

in myself, to be honest.

They should not be able to see

- that I'm not impressed
- with them.

- You want to stick Tiffany
- and Julia more in front of them?

I can only be, like,

pushed so far

before it's gonna be apparent

that I'm getting a little bit

sick of being treated like sh...

Next on "Below Deck Med"...

I want to come home.

- I just want to get through
- this charter.

- I just want to get through it
- and get off the boat.

Let's take a couple.

Me and you right here.

I can't have my phone out.

These guys are hypocrites.

Really isn't fair.

Watch the road, Daniel-son.

- I don't trust Daniel,
- period.

- I know he's gonna do something
- bad with his phone,

And I'm keeping an eye out.

Put your, uh, - info in there.

- How you talk to me sometimes
- is very condescending,

- And you went to private school
- in England...

- The upper crust people
- I would avoid.

It was the people like Jules

- that were pointing that finger
- at me,


"You're a snobby bastard."

Screw you.

For more information

on "Below Deck Med,"