Below Deck (2013–…): Season 6, Episode 1 - Episode #6.1 - full transcript

[percussive music]

- Tahiti's gorgeous.
I feel like I've stepped back

into a land before time.

- To be able to charter
a yacht here

really says something.

You talk about prestige.

- Whoo!

- This one's gonna be nuts.

Is this our favorite anchorage?
- Yeah.

- Every season
I come on board,

I'm hoping for the best.
- Kate, please serve them



real food.

- But, you know, God always
gets the last laugh.

- Are you kidding?
----ing close the door!

- Jesus, it's like
a demon's in the master.

- I'm not a big fan
of babysitting.

To me, excuses are just
silly ass ----ing reasons

for people not doing
their goddamn jobs.

- Are you listening, Rhylee?

I'm very strict on deck.

My father being a yacht captain
definitely ingrained that

into my skull.
You don't have to like me,

but you will respect me.

- How makeup-y is her pillow?

I'm a steward, and I pride
myself on service.



♪ Working, working,
always working ♪

I'm a perfectionist
in everything that I do.

I have nothing to wear.

This takes hours.

I'm having a bad hair day,

which is, in general,
just a bad day.

- Wait, do you like
boys or girls or both?

I live for meeting
new people.

I love to hear other
people's opinions.

Adrian, mind your own
----ing business.

I love it
when things get weird.

I try to keep it weird.
We're all weirdoes.

- This looks so pretty.

- I would say I'm not
the typical yacht chef.

I meditate a lot.
I do yoga.

Omm...

I love pushing myself

and thinking outside the box.

- I love wowing the guests.
- It's so yummy.

I can't even handle this.
I'm so overwhelmed.

- I think I heard Ross
was on deck already.

- He's a go-getter.

- I grew up in New Zealand
with not much.

When I found superyachts,

I found something
that I was passionate about,

and I'm not gonna stop
till I get to the top.

Got nothing
to dress this up?

- Why would I have
anything to dress her up?

- Ooh, wow.
- Oh, hello!

- I'm definitely not
the girl next door.

I'm a trucker's daughter,
and I spit.

I burp.
[belches]

And I have a temper.

I said I got it
four ----ing times.

- Oh, that Ashton,
you gotta keep an eye on him.

- I give my everything
into my job.

- One more champagne and water.
I'll turn on the birthday cake.

- It was a request
for Magnum condoms.

- Yachting is long hours
and hard work.

- We have no towels,
no water.

- Shut the (BLEEP) up.
I'm speaking.

- It's a recipe for disaster.

- [gasps]

- Anybody that I see
not taking this seriously...

- Oh, my God!
- Jesus Christ.

- Carefully.
- Ohh!

- Pack your sh-- and get
the (BLEEP) off the boat.

- Shall I unroll the one--
- Stop yelling.

- And I'm serious
as a heart attack.

- (BLEEP)! (BLEEP)!

- Man overboard.
- What?

- Oh!
- Oh, no!

- Come to Tahiti, they said.

- It'll be sunny,
they said.

[boat horn blows]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[percussive music]

- God damn it!

Those waves are huge.

- It's a big boat.

Nice. Restrained opulence.

Like me.

♪ ♪

Hello!

- How ya doing, Kate?
- I'm good.

How are you?
- Good.

- You look sharp!
- Welcome to Tahiti.

- Thank you. It looks
different on the internet.

- It does, doesn't it?
- Yeah.

- We're gonna have
a good time.

I mean, exotic location,
to say the least.

The hurricanes
took a devastating toll

on the Caribbean, and it's
gonna take them a while

to recover from it.

Tahiti's been on my bucket
list for years and years.

And while we're all pulling

and we all stand behind
the Caribbean,

we're really excited to be able
to charter here this season.

I'm hoping
the weather breaks,

because we got a
charter tomorrow.

Your crew should be here
shortly.

You have a steward.
Josiah.

Qualified butler.
- Wait. Is he...for me?

- Yeah.
- I'm so excited!

He's a retired
competitive gymnast.

Cool.
- And then next up,

we have Caroline.
- A solo stewardess,

meaning she can do a little bit
of everything,

and she's a hard worker.

She got her degree
in psychology.

Do you ever notice
girls who major in psychology

are usually a little
crazy?

- [laughs]

This is our chef, Adrian.

- "My passion is to heal

through the creative
art of cooking."

- [laughing]

Good to have ya on board.
- Good to be back.

I'm gonna go explore.

[airy music]

Hmm.

- Hey-o.
- Hi.

- Hmm. This is weird.

- Nice galley.

- Josiah.
- Josiah.

- What's your name?
- Caroline.

- Nice to meet you.
- Pleasure.

- It's nice up here.

[light music]

- So you're from England.
- Yeah. Where are you from?

- Ohio. What do you do?

- Steward.

- Shut up!

- What do you do?
- That's sick!

- A stew!

- Sick.

- Hey, good morning.
- You must be Chandler.

- I am, yes, sir.

Pleasure to meet ya.
- Pleasure's mine.

Have a seat.
- Drop my bag...

- You've been on a few boats.
- Yes, sir.

- "Bad Influence 2".

- That was out of Chicago.

- What was "Big Chubby"
like?

- Fun boat.
Smaller boat.

A bosun's position's
pretty tough.

I just want captain
to be happy,

because the next job
I go to,

they're gonna want
that reference.

- You know, I'm pretty basic

as far as the way
I want the crew to run.

We uncover everything
before the first guest gets up.

Somebody's always up
with the late stew.

- Okay.
- The Pacific

is a little different
because you get bigger seas.

- You got reef everywhere.
- Yes.

Tahiti is Reef Central
because it's so remote.

If you screw up here,
there's no towboat

coming to pull your ass out.

I don't like to micromanage.
I don't like to babysit.

If I've gotta babysit,
then you're not

the person I need.
- Understood.

- Okay. That's all I got
for right now.

- Thank you, sir.

- Hey.
- Hey, how's it going?

- So far?
- What's happening?

- Ashton.
New Zealand?

- Yeah, brother.
Where you from?

- South Africa.
- Aw, nice.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- Hi!
both: Hi!

- How are you guys?
- Great! How are you?

- Good, how's it going?
- Caroline.

- Kate. Nice to meet you.
- Josiah.

- Nice to meet you.
I saw your resumes.

You guys look like
you have good experience.

You were solo stewardess
a lot,

which I know is a lotta work.
- It--Yeah, it is.

- You have bartending
experience?

- I do, but it's been--
I mean, I'm rusty.

I had to go home
and tend to family sh--.

It is scary to walk on
a boat with strangers.

You don't know
if the personalities

are going to jibe.
I'm just gonna do my best

to be a team player
and pull my weight.

- And you're pretty--
- Yeah.

- What do you think
is your strength?

- I'd probably say my strength
is more like service side.

I trained in England at
a British butler academy,

and I'm a qualified butler
with a little bow tie.

It's very English, I think.
[laughs]

- I did put your uniforms

in rooms where I think
you guys would like to be.

Is it Josiah?
- Like Messiah, but with a J.

- I put you with me,
and we're gonna be--

I've never seen this.
It's cool.

It's like a little--
they call it the penthouse.

- Oh, sick.
- Caroline, you're in here

with a female deckhand.
- Okay.

- I think she's female.
Actually, I don't know.

The other rooms are bigger,

but I just kinda like--

It feels like we're special

being up high.
- Yeah.

'Cause I can look down
on people! Yeah!

Figured you could flip--
- Yeah. I'll just flip up.

- Uh-huh. Dismount.
- You'll be seeing that a lot.

- Hey.
- Hey! How's it going?

- Good. How are you?
- Who are you?

- Adrian.
I'm gonna be the chef.

- Adrian.
Caroline, pleasure.

- Nice to meet you.
- I'm Kate.

Welcome aboard.
- Thank you.

- Um, Adrian...
- Tell me.

- I have you in here
with the bosun.

- Beautiful.

- Adrian looks really young
and malnourished.

I'm a little concerned.
I just don't think

malnourished and chef
belong in the same sentence.

What do you think of

that galley?
- It's nice.

- Oh, you're so sweet.
- [laughing]

[both laughing]

- [laughing]

- Hi!
- Ross.

- Ross? I'm Rhylee.
- Yeah.

- Rhylee. Good to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

- Ashton.
-A-Aston?

- Ashton.
- Ashton.

- Ashton and Ross.
Nice to meet you.

- Uh, deckhand.
- Deckhand. Oh, sweet.

Yeah, that's us.
- Nice! Okay, good.

I'm in like a totally
different world of boating.

We don't have anything
this pretty.

I work as co-captain
and a mate

on fishing charters
in Alaska.

It's not a lot about
the ambiance.

It's more about catching
that monster halibut.

And you get dirty
and you get gory and bloody

and I love it.

- I'm up for anything.
A lot of people don't realize

Alaskan girls are badass.
[laughter]

I left my luggage
down there.

You guys are gonna get 'em?
- Yeah.

- How you doing?
- Hi!

- Chandler.
- Chandler. I'm Rhylee.

- Rhylee? I'm the bosun
on board.

- You are? I'm one of
your deckhands.

- You are? Okay.
- Yeah.

- What's up, brother?
- What's going on, man?

- Ross.
- Chandler.

- Good to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

- Ashton.
- Ashton? Chandler.

both: Nice to meet you.

- We're just gonna meet,
get to know everyone,

go over what's going on.

So how was everyone's flight?
- Long.

- Long? Where are you
coming from?

- South Africa.
- South Africa...

- New Zealand.
- New Zealand.

- Alaska.
- I'm a Florida boy.

Been in the industry
full-time about six years.

I grew up doing this
from like a young age.

Father and brother are both
captains in the industry.

I grew up doing boat
deliveries with my father,

so this isn't a job for me.
It's a career.

You know, I'm very relaxed
running the deck,

but I expect the best
out of everyone all the time.

I don't like any hierarchy when
it comes to the deck group,

so everyone's gonna do
the same jobs.

There's no pecking order.

But Chandler's in charge,
and I'm not trying to

step on his toes.

- We're all learning
the boat together,

so it's gonna be long hours.

We just need to make
the best of it.

But, uh, let's get started.

Hey. What's going on?
- Hi. How are you?

- Hey.
- How you doing? Chandler.

- Adrian.
- Hi, I'm Kate.

- Kate. Pleasure to meet ya.
- Good handshake.

- Hi. How are you?
- Hi. How are you?

- Good. I'm Rhylee.
- Rhylee, Caroline.

- This is us, buddy.
- So I'll just take this one.

- Okay, cool.

Hey?

[both laughing]

[both chuckling]

- So I haven't made up my mind

about this stew pantry
quite yet.

For a boat this size,
it's surprisingly small.

The boat is 180 feet.

I was very excited,
because I thought

bigger stew pantries,

bigger crew mess,
bigger laundry room.

Unfortunately, things down
below are not that big.

So what--what first--
This is a disaster.

It's kind of like if you were
dating Shaquille O'Neal

and you found out he had
a really small penis.

And also champagne flutes,
if they'll fit.

Just for quick grabbing.
- Yeah, okay.

- If we're not gonna use them--
- And this is fine.

You've got espresso cups,
small milk jugs...

other than having to be
like this?

- I just don't like--
- We can get rid of these.

- I know.
- I'd love to get rid of these.

- I'm gonna go check out
the bilge situation.

- Okay. Should I explain
what Kate and I said?

- I was standing
right here.

- Were you? When we
were talking about this?

Didn't even notice.
- Uh, yeah, well, you know.

I don't have a lot of
charisma.

Working on a yacht,
it is a bit high schoolesque.

I think you have to establish
who you are off the bat.

I'm just standing
right next to you!

- [laughing]
- You're such a dick.

- Servers dressed up
as cupids.

- Holy God.

Ashton is obviously
----ing hot.

[laughing]
- Wow!

- You can put those

- You can put those
back in there.

- Just start on this side
and work across and...

yeah.
- I'll get on to it now.

- I like a self-sufficient
crew.

Ross is awesome.

- So what do we want out first?
- Let's work as a team here,

so one will rinse,
one will scrub.

Cool?
- Okay.

- Have you used these
machines before?

- No.
- I'll give you a rundown.

- Challenges of a new crew:
Are they gonna

gel with each other,
are they gonna get along?

- How we looking there, champs?
- Looks better.

- So far...it's going well.

- We should maybe put some
white gloves up here.

- Good idea.

- All crew, all crew.
I need everybody

in the Sky Lounge
in five minutes.

- Copy for deck.
- Copy for interior.

♪ ♪

- First thing I wanna do

is introduce the first officer,

Jake, and our engineer's
Will and Johan.

I have three rules:
work hard,

don't embarrass yourself,

and don't embarrass the boat.

- Captain Lee--
his eyes are so intense!

He'll just look at you
and you're like, yes, sir.

- We pay attention
to those three rules,

we'll get along just fine.
We don't...

you get a little
somethin', somethin' extra

in your, uh, tip envelope--

an airplane ticket outta here
on Air Tahiti Nui.

I've looked at your resumes.

Everybody seems competent
enough and qualified enough.

I personally considered
last year to be disastrous.

- Watch your boat,
watch your boat!

[loud thud]
- God damn it!

- We gotta go with
the current.

- I'm just listening
to what you're telling me.

- We're gonna ----ing
hit him.

We have a much bigger boat.

It's no place
to be earning your stripes.

They have the credentials,
but if they don't deliver

they can give their soul
to Jesus,

'cause their ass
belongs to me.

Let's go to work.
- Understood.

[energetic music]

- You guys wanna go through
beach club?

- Yeah.
- So this area's like...

is kinda one of those places
that always needs to be perfect

'cause as soon
as we drop the hook,

all the toys are goin' out.

I'm used to working with
seasoned yachties

with years of experience.

Rhylee's worked on boats
before,

but they've been
fishing boats,

so I need to keep
an eye on her.

- So we got the bosun's
locker, the wash locker...

- It's not called
the bosun locker

because we're not
allowed in it, right?

- Wait, what
- Like the bosun locker--

It just sounds like
that'd be like your...

- Oh, no. It's everyone's.
- Like you--Okay.

I mean, I know that sounds like
a stupid question,

but it just...
we don't have a bosun

on board a fishing boat.
[laughter]

- Adrian, being from
St. Martin,

what got you into yachting?
You just saw them everywhere?

- My father
was a yacht captain.

He got me
pretty involved in it.

He just actually passed away
three weeks ago.

- Oh, I'm so sorry.

- I just spent the past couple
months taking care of him.

He had stage four
lung cancer,

so it's been...it's been going
on for like a year and a half.

My father was my best friend.

It was just heartbreaking
to see him wither away.

He didn't take sh--
from anybody.

He was just such
a strong person.

He gave me so much--
so much love, so much empathy.

He was just a really
beautiful person.

So it was a hard past
couple of months.

- [sighs] Ohh...

- All crew, all crew,
we have provisions

on the stern.

♪ ♪

- To my cabin?
- [laughs] Yeah.

- Little heavy.

♪ ♪

- Smells like fish!

- Uh-oh. Are these
Captain Lee's?

Are they clean or dirty?
- Oh, my God!

They're clean.
But they're wet.

- I'm sorry?

- Yeah. You can keep
telling me. Don't worry.

- Are you in a relationship?

- Ashton is definitely

a fun piece of man candy.

Ashton.
- Yeah?

- Make sure you rinse
really well.

[Ashton chuckles]

[bright music]

♪ ♪

- Beautiful.

Ya-hoo.
Come on, baby.

- Do you wanna talk about
why you like to do charters

or what you usually do?
- Yeah.

I did four years
of formal French training

and culinary schools
in Paris.

Right now, I consider myself
as a free flow artist.

I love blowing people's minds.

Look at these cute little
desk lights.

I'm gonna make desserts
and the dessert's

gonna be mounted on top of
this, and as they eat it,

the lights are gonna start
shooting out at them.

This is how I woo women,
usually.

- Adrian, Kate, Chandler,
I need you guys

up to the bridge for
a preference sheet meeting.

- Copy.
- Roger.

- How you doing?
- Hello, hello.

- Ms. Chastain.
- Hello.

- How's things going?
New crew.

- I think the crew's
amazing.

- You really have
some good talent there.

- Yeah.
- How you feel about

the galley?
- Oh, it'll work good.

I'll make it work good.

- I like that.

- I think I'm very happy.

One has a lot more experience
than the other,

but the one that doesn't
have experience

has a good attitude so far,
so it's great.

- So here's who we have

for our first charter.

- Well,
look who it is!

- Mr. Foam Man,
our primary charter guest.

His name is Steve Bradley.

They were previous
charter guests

and Steve's a friend of mine.

The reason they call him
Foam Man

is because he wanted
a foam party,

and the wind was blowing
so bad,

we couldn't get it
past his ankles.

- This is not a foam party.

More foam, bosun!

Hey, come on,
make it happen!

- It was just like

a malfunctioning carwash.

- So I should maybe make
a foamy dish.

- That's cute.

It's kind of nice
that we have a returning guest,

because I know his
preferences,

and I know that he'll be

blackout drunk
most of the time

So even if we mess up,
he won't remember.

- So he and his fiancée Jenn

are coming on this charter
to celebrate

their two-year anniversary
and Jenn's 32nd birthday.

They want a Polynesian picnic

because they wanna do
the black sand beach,

romantic dinner,
and servers dressed up

as cupids.
- I'm not wearing a diaper.

- Heart-shaped birthday cake
any problem for ya?

- Not at all.
- Jet Skiis

subject to

the amount of sobriety
we have.

- I mean,
what are the alternatives

if for some reason we don't
leave the dock tomorrow?

- We're gonna go with plan B

which is probably whatever
Kate can come up with.

- Okay.
- It's a good charter

to start off with.
- Cool.

- That's a wrap.
- Thank you, Captain.

- Ah, there we go.

- Cute, man.

Ever since Kai came into
my life,

I've put him first.

- So it's a repeat
charter guest,

and he's enthusiastic...

- Yeah.
- Likes alcohol.

He also has
a lot of requests.

It's her 32nd birthday.

He wants servers
dressed as cupids.

Then they want a Polynesian
picnic on a black sand beach.

But that'll have to be
day two,

because tomorrow,
we're stuck at the dock.

Which brings me to
another point--

Because we're stuck
at the dock all day

and it's raining, we have to
really entertain them.

That's it.
- Right. Okay.

- Okay.

- Welcome to Tahiti.
- Good lord!

- See you guys at 8:00.
You did great.

- I'll catch you guys
in the morning, all right?

Good night.

- Steve is coming back,

and last time,
he was a handful.

A drunken handful.

[sighs]

Bad weather means
I do all the work,

and the guests are still
disappointed,

so it's just a lose-lose.

♪ ♪

[groans]

- Somebody's birthday?

- Aah!

Aaaaahhhh!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Have you seen outside?

It's a charter miracle.
- So glad I can see blue sky.

- You know how to fold
toilet paper into a diamond?

- Yes.
- Okay, that bathroom needs it.

There should be cleaning
products under these sinks.

Each bathroom
gets hand towels,

conditioner, and shower gel
in the shower.

- More whisky.

- Let's put the excess
wine down

where the champagne is.
The umbrellas,

put 'em in that closet.
- Okay.

- The guests are never the most
difficult part of the job,

because they leave
after a few days.

It's always the crew,
'cause you're stuck with them.

- It doesn't look like
organized, but--

- No, you did a great job.
Okay, good.

It's really too soon to tell,

but so far, so good.

And this one's done.
- Attention, all crew.

We got 20 minutes
till guest arrival,

so I need everybody
in their whites.

♪ ♪

- Can you tuck me in?
- Yeah.

- This is your
birthday gift, dear.

- I know!

♪ ♪

- Look at the size
of that boat!

You go first, baby.

- Hello!

- Hello, Jenn.

- Nice to see you!

- How you doing?
- How are ya, buddy?

Good to see ya.
- Meet the crew.

Get a glass of champagne.
- Hello! How are you again?

both: Nice to see you.

- Cheers. I'm Steve.

- Adrian, sir.
- My pleasure.

- So welcome aboard, buddy.

- Good to see ya again.

- Kate's gonna show you
around the boat.

We'll get your luggage
onboard.

- Fantastic.
- And we'll get this

celebration started.
- Sounds good!

- And happy birthday!
- Thank you!

- Cheers!
- Whoo!

- If everybody's ready,
we'll start the tour.

- We're ready!
- Right this way.

♪ ♪

- So this is your master
stateroom.

- Look how big!
- Wow.

I even have a desk
in case I wanna work.

Not!

- The bathroom can easily
fit all of you guys.

- Party in the bathroom.

- Right this way.
We have our Sky Lounge.

- Oh, nice!

- It's so big.

- Is that it?
- Yeah.

- Chandler, you need to get
your guys in position.

- Copy.
- Now I'm gonna bring you

to the back.
I think this is where you guys

will enjoy most of your meals.

- Fantastic!
- Okay!

- And then up top,
we have our sun deck.

- Jacuzzi!
- Huge Jacuzzi.

- You're gonna be on
the port quarter.

- Now to the guest quarters.
Right this way.

We've got one queen bed
in here.

- Bigger than my apartment.
- It's time to do this.

- Now, what to drink?

- You did a wonderful job.
Just bop in the other

empty rooms and check
their toilet paper

so you can give them
a refill real quick.

- Cut the stern loose.
- Go ahead and drop it.

- This one, Chandler?
- Yes.

Let it go?

Just let me get it. Here.

It's tough,
what I do in Alaska,

because I am
a female captain,

which is kind of unheard of.

- Can I do it for you?
- Pull the line in?

- Take it off the cleat
first--

- I'm listening to him
as he instructs me.

To be worthy,
I have to prove myself,

and in a male-dominated
industry,

it's not always the easiest.

- Okay, three and three.

- Oh! I have to
see you now.

- Okay.
- Can we go down to

my state room for a second?
- Yes, of course.

- Great.
- I can make you a drink

on the way.
- Uh, great.

They have more bathrooms
than my house.

No, not really.
I have 17 bathrooms.

Come with me, please.
So here's what we got.

We have to make Jennifer's
birthday party happen.

- Yes.
- We have 500 balloons.

- Okay.
- And I want our room

filled with balloons.
- I love it.

And I've got lots
of crew, uh,

full of hot air.
- [blowing]

Perfect!

- Let's go ahead and cut
the forward lines off.

Okay, all bow lines clear.

- Taking up on the anchor.

Leaving the dock,
it's a choreographed dance.

It gets difficult.
Step on a lotta toes.

- Anchor is at the water line.
You are free to maneuver.

- We're about to
get outta here.

♪ ♪

- Sailing out of this
sh-- weather

and on to the horizon!

- Good job.

- We're gonna do that late,
early, or whatever.

- I'll probably be on early.
She'll be on middle.

And you'll be on late.
- I'll be on late.

- You're trying
to keep me like semi-sober.

Just on the balance.
I don't wanna be totally sober.

- For the plates for lunch?
- Yes?

- Do you have something
kind of long?

- What about this?
- Yeah, that's good.

All my food comes from
all my life experiences.

It can be a tapestry
on the wall.

It can be a scent that I had
when I was six

at my grandmother's house.

And when I'm working abroad,
I try to incorporate

all the local dishes.

Polynesia--that's coconut,
pineapple,

those kind of flavors.

- How much call time
do you need for lunch?

- 15 minutes,
something like that.

- Okay. 15 minutes starts now.

- Perfect.

♪ ♪

- Can you move over
to the table,

because we are going to
dazzle you.

- Dazzle us!

You're the woman
of my dreams.

I've waited 60 years.

I hung up my bachelor
card to be with this lady.

- So pretty.

- Okay.

- Would you like
[indistinct] or sparkling?

- So I'm gonna come
present it.

- Oh, great!

- How beautiful.

- So this is a tropical salad
with a pineapple dressing,

marinated ginger shrimp,
white tuna,

and some swordfish.
Enjoy.

[mellow music]

♪ ♪

- Delicious.
- Yeah?

- Very good.
- Really good frickin' fish.

- How's everything so far?
- The shrimp is great.

- Good!

Did not see perfect,
effortless,

amazing cuisine coming from

the malnourished
14-year-old.

They love the shrimp.

- We're coming in on our
approach to the anchorage.

Just be aware.

20-knot breeze.
102 feet.

2 feet on either side of us.
Yeah!

If you screw up here...
- You're in trouble.

- Jeez, we're really close
to that reef.

- This is not where you
wanna (BLEEP) up.

In the Caribbean, you start
out in 100 feet of water

and you gradually work your
way up to the shore.

Here, you can be
in 50 feet of water,

then all of a sudden,
you're hitting solid reef.

If I screw up,
our charter season's over.

- Whoa!

- We don't have a lotta
room right here.

You couldn't ram a straight pin
up my ass

with a 10-pound
sledge hammer right now.

- Whoa!

- Jeez. We're really close
to that reef.

- We don't have a lot of room
right here.

But we're down
to 10 knots of wind.

Is that the sun?

When you've got good light,
you can see the reef

through the water.
Kinda nice that it is

breaking now.
Piece of cake.

- Where are we going?

- Someplace called um...
can't pronounce it.

- What about "Hahtutuahna"?
- Okay. That sounds good to me.

- Port of...
- I think it's probably...

- Oh. Okay.

[both laughing]

♪ ♪

- Those can't go--
- Dishwasher, dishwasher.

- Oh!
- The only things

that cannot go
in the dishwasher

are gonna be dinner plates
with gold around the edges.

- Got it.

- Hey, I love this door.

This door just--I love--
Look at this sh--.

Push this button with your toe.

Close sesame.
- Ooh, I love it.

- I need one of those
in my house!

- Open sesame.
Look at this!

- Now it's not--
- Oh, no.

How do we get outta here?
We're trapped in the kitchen.

- There's a button on top.
- This one?

- Yes, sir.
- No.

- Yep.

- Ooh!
- Oh, my God.

I'm obviously not a baller.
I don't have this sh--.

- All right, Chandler,
on my mark,

give me five shots.

- Roger that.
Five shots.

- Five shots now, Chandler.

[energetic music]

♪ ♪

- That's five
to the water line.

It dug in pretty good
right there.

- Copy that.
Let's lock it up.

♪ ♪

- Wusses is who they are.

- Yeah. I eat a lot of
raw cacao.

And it releases a bunch of
endorphins.

- You get high?
- It's like the actual

chocolate high.
- Is that an aphrodisiac

or something?
- Yeah.

- Adrian definitely
has a naughty side.

I mean, he grew up
in St. Martin

which is basically like
the lawless Las Vegas

of the Caribbean.

Sex, drugs, and alcohol--
He's into it.

- Yeah, I drink a little
bit every day.

I mix it with maca.
Maca root is great

for like sexual potency.

- I'm not gonna need that
for at least six weeks,

Adrian, so...
- You never know.

- I-I'm pretty sure.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- You can lower it down
slowly.

- Kate!
- Hi!

- Kate, Kate!

Hey, Kate.
- Hi.

- Could you get me another
captain and--

- Is that diet?
- Yeah.

And make it a little--
We're a little cold

in here, man.
My nipples are sticking out.

- I know! I noticed.
- Yeah.

Did you notice that?
- Only once you

pointed them out.
- Thank you very much.

- Okay.
Let's go grab dinner

as soon as everything's
away up here.

- All these balloons
I need blown up.

Encourage the deck crew
to participate.

Also have to make
cupid costumes.

- Because never behind
closed doors

we don't have like
a factory of minions.

- No.
I don't wanna put 500 balloons

in Steve's room tonight.

I just wanna put one sleeping
pill in his mouth.

- Why don't you get
them to wear tighty whiteys?

- Captain Lee's?
- Yeah.

- We have that one--
- There's one here.

- And also, you're asking
adults to wear diapers.

Nobody wants to have sex
with babies.

That's weird!

- Yes!
It's perfect.

- It is perfect.

All right,
you go ahead of me.

I'm gonna put
this shammy away.

- Pump, pump more.
- Each mouthful you eat,

you have to do a balloon.

- All right.
- Eat big mouthfuls.

- I'll participate.
- They also want people

dressed as Cupid.
- I think it's gotta be

Ashton.

- Kate, Kate!

I have a special
gift for Captain Lee.

- Oh, good.
- I want him to wear

this shirt at dinner
tonight.

- It's wonderful.
You're a genius!

- I am a genius.
- He's gonna love it.

- He's gonna love it.
Oh, I don't think--

Actually, I don't think
he's gonna love it.

- But that makes me
love it a little bit more.

- And me too.
- Uh-huh.

I'll give it to him now.

- Hey, guys.
- Hi, Cupid.

Can you go try these on?
- Can I try these on?

- Yeah, go in your cabin
and try them on.

This is not a joke.

- Why did this happen
that I must wear these?

- Cupid is blond.

You're the only
blond person here.

- I'm not going out
just in this.

I feel like
you're setting me up.

- Honestly, do you know
what--it's gonna be huge.

Just go try them on.
- What's gonna be huge?

- I don't know.
We'll see.

- If you need to stuff,
stuff.

- Okay, fine.
- You gonna wax first or what?

Are you a little bit pasty?
- My thighs are a bit pasty.

I must be honest,
I'm okay not wearing much,

because when I was
a lot younger,

I used to do a bit of
stripping.

Um...

you're 19 years old,
you go into these clubs

for ladies' nights
and you're dancing

and you're getting attention
from these women,

and it's just great!
[laughing]

- We have some sausage-shaped
balloons if you need one.

- I'm trying to keep it
a secret as long as I can,

to be honest.
- You're the one [indistinct]

out of all of us.

You have the body, right?
All the girls

wanna see you, my man.

- Yes. You want it all?

Dude, don't shush me.
You shh!

- She's gonna lose
her sh-- at some point.

- Steve has asked you

- Steve has asked you
to wear this at dinner.

I think
it's a fantastic idea.

- [laughing]
- I'm gonna go back to blowing

all the balloons.
Down there. Blowing.

- Got t.

[bright music]

♪ ♪

- I'm being buried
in this frigging thing.

In my will,
honest to God.

- How's it going, Chef?

- Another day in paradise.

Tonight I'm making
surf 'n' turf.

I'm thinking
let's deconstruct it,

one surf, one turf, one surf,

funky decoration,
funky presentation

and let's do it.

- If you're ready to move
to the table,

Captain Lee's on his way.
- We are.

Ha haaaaaaaa!

[energetic music]

- How nice is this?
- We want you at the head

of the table.

Buddy.

- Multiple course menu
tonight.

Shrimp bisque with some
green prairie coconut foam

for Mr. Foam.

- I feel pretty.

♪ ♪

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Thank you, Kate.
- You're welcome.

This is a beautiful
shrimp bisque

with a coconut Thai foam.

And then a little bit
of lobster on a crustini.

Enjoy.
- Yum.

- Mmm!
- This is off the charts.

Un...believable.

[playful music]

- Oh, my God.
[laughter]

Where's, uh, your
safety pins?

- I don't have any.
- Can I get in your inseam?

I can't...

- I'm just trying to see--

- You gotta see what
you're workin' with, bro.

- Ashton is a great candidate
for playing Cupid.

Obviously,
he's ----ing hot.

Can you spread 'em?
[laughter]

Sorry.
- Wow!

- He asked me to help,
and I'm happy to do it.

Turn around.

[laughing]

Good to go.

- How was the foam?

All good?

- No...
[laughs]

- The foam is coming.

- Kate, Kate, Josiah,
and finishing up

with the starter now.

- Go ahead and set out
the starter fork

and the starter knife
for everyone.

- Isn't the next course
sashimi with chopsticks?

- Oh, yeah, good one.

- He's on top of it.
- He's very good.

I love him.

- Beef sashimi boiled
in a sheep cheese.

- That's a tongue twister.

Here we have beef sashimi

with a sheep cheese

and a crisp and fresh
orange segment.

- Mmm!
Really good.

- This is amazing.
- That's really good.

- Deck crew, deck crew, Kate.
You guys can start bringing

all the balloons
to the master, please.

- Copy that, Kate.

- Will you please
go to the master,

start a turn down.
You know how to do

a turn down?
- Okay.

- You are the Miley Cyrus
of yacht ships.

I hope you know
that's a huge compliment.

- Oh, my God!
- [laughing]

- Crab and lobster salad

with a mash
and fruit sweet chile.

- How many ingredients
have we made?

Here we have a crab
and lobster salad

with a mint crab wonton.

- Mmm.
- This is delicious.

- Unbelievable.
- Fantastic.

- This is the first meal
I've had with our chef,

and my socks and underwear
are sittin' on the floor.

Damn! I'm lovin' life.

- So good, right?
- This guy's good.

- Okay, here comes the
biggest compliment I've ever--

I've never seen
Captain Lee so happy

- Really?
- With a new chef. Nope.

They were saying
"He's wowing us,

it's incredible."
- Cool.

- Adrian's food is beautiful.

Not only is it beautiful,
it's delicious.

Not only is it beautiful
and delicious,

he executes it calmly
and confidently.

I think he's an alien.

♪ ♪

- I'm gonna knock you
off now,

that way you're fresh
tomorrow.

- Okay, um...

- Go down for a break,
and maybe we'll have you

come back later, yeah.
- I'll come back.

All right, bro. Thanks, man.
- Cool. Thank you.

- You're not wearing
any pants.

- Is that your junk,
or is that folded weird?

- [laughing]
- It's my junk.

- Can you please go get
the tinsel to wrap--

- To wrap around the waist.
- Tinsel--

- To distract the eye?
- Sure.

- Everyone hopes for
a little bit of eye candy.

Whether you can afford it
or not,

it's always nice
to window shop.

- Will you go down and do
the turn-down

for the guest quarters?
- I did.

- The air that's coming
out from here, you know?

Is there an air conditioning?
- Yes. Do you want it off?

[overlapping chatter]

- I just--Don't shush me.

- You did the guest quarters?
- Yes.

- I am so impressed with you.
- Thank you.

Don't shush me if I'm
trying to tell her something.

- But she's in a conversation
with the chef about dinner.

- Okay. All right, no, no.
Okay, you're right.

I do not like to be shushed.

It's dismissive,
it's belittling.

- She's like, "Kate,
Kate, Kate."

- Was I wrong?
- No, no, I think--

I literally think
everybody's tired.

- Shh, shh.

No, you shh!

- Just like, hold on a second.

Let Kate finish
the conversation with Adrian,

and then...
- She's gonna lose her sh--

sometimes.
- She'll lose her sh--.

- Let's get some wine,
and let's--

- Do you want your
birthday cake in here then?

- Yeah! That'd be great!

- Okay, so he wants
the birthday cake

in the Sky Lounge.

Cupid, cake, time.

Let's light it and go.

- Cheers!

- Somebody's birthday?

- Aah!

Aaaahhhhh!

Aaah!
[squealing, chatter]

- Happy birthday.
- Aaaaahhh!

Oh, my God,
it's her birthday!

Oh, sh--!

Oh, my God,
it's Cupid in a diaper!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!
Bravo!

[all whooping]
- Happy birthday.

- Did you put anything
else in that diaper?

Any Twinkies?

- No, no.
[laughing]

- Thank you for
including me this evening.

- Are you kidding me,
including you?

- Appreciate it.
Okay.

- Good night.
- I gave you

a lot of balloons
in your room.

[giggling]

[overlapping comments]

- I have to be on deck
at 6:30--I'm going to bed.

[mellow music]

- [groans]

[pop]
- You got a lotta balloons

here, baby.

- I need to give you
a life jacket.

- I don't wear life jackets.
- He can't be

doing this sh--.
- There he goes.

- This is not a ----ing

discussion here.
Put the ski away.

[percussive music]

♪ ♪

- Good morning.
Want some tea?

- Hello, Mr. Foam.
- Yay!

- [sighs]

- I'm going jet skiing!

- You look like a pimp daddy.
- I know.

- Drop the toys
in the water!

I'm ready to roll!

- This guy is insane.

He's just on vacay,
and he's still drunk

from the night before.
It's concerning.

I hope he doesn't
fall overboard.

I don't get a good feeling.

- I'm not here to sleep.

[overlapping chatter]
I'm not here to ----ing sleep.

I'm here to jet ski--
- Sorry, Steve.

- Captain, Captain,

Steve has requested
to launch the skis.

- Affirmative. Make sure
you instruct him

to stay a million miles
away from any reef.

- Captain Lee doesn't trust me
in my Sea-Dooing abilities.

- You want me to keep going?
- Keep going--yep.

- Just stay away
from that reef.

You don't want a jacket?
- No.

- Here you are, my lovelies.
- Oh, thank you.

- Let's go, Steve.
You're up.

Oh, there he goes.

- He's a wild man.
He just passed by twice

in ten seconds.

- Aaaaahhhh!

- Dude, almost I have
a ----ing heart attack there.

- (BLEEP)[indistinct]

- You should give him
a life jacket, eh?

- He doesn't want one.

I've had it in the past
where owners

won't wear a life vest,
and it's kind of

at their discretion.

I don't think
it's gonna be a big deal.

- He can't be doing
this sh--.

That's just crazy.

Our job is to keep them safe.

If something happens,
then we're all ----ed.

Steve, I need to
give you a life jacket.

- He's got to wear
a life jacket.

Captain, Steve's refusing
to take the life jacket.

- On my way.

- Who needs an ass-kicking?
- Put a jacket on, Steve.

- Who's gonna--

- You have to.

- Then I'm--

Soon as the ski comes in,
pull the plug on it.

You hit the water
at 70 miles an hour,

and that's like hitting
a goddamn brick.

You can break bones.
You can break your neck.

- This is not a ----ing
discussion.

I can't let you die
on my watch.

- (BLEEP) 'em all.
I'm a pro rider!

[dramatic music]

- If that crew dropped
the ball,

that's deadly serious.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- This season
on "Below Deck"...

- Tahiti's
a brand-new playground--

remote,

exotic...

- Fire dancing
and flower crowns.

We are not in
the Caribbean anymore.

[intense music]

- Whoo!

- This is the most
beautiful place

I've seen in my life.
- This is perfection.

- You guys are amazing.

Thank you!
- So she is breast feeding.

Can we put the breast milk
somewhere, like a freezer?

- Oh, here we go.

We need a bigger Tupperware.

- Chicken is what
poor people eat.

- You're not wrong.
- You mind just clearing off

his night stand?
- Oh! (BLEEP) I didn't even

see that!
Ugh!

- This is great.
- Yeah!

- Oh!
- Yeah!

- I have nothing against
hooking up with your coworkers.

- Ashton and Rhylee
are gonna have sex

like two crocodiles fighting.

- Chandler, Caroline.
- She's obsessed with Chandler.

- Can I have another bite?
- If I don't get laid soon,

we're gonna have
a problem.

- Oh, yeah!
- [laughing]

- We're running around like
chickens without a head.

- I don't like to micromanage,
but I will.

- I'm also
a boat captain.

- I need to know
if the keys are in

the ----ing tender.
I asked that three times,

and I got no reply.

- Kate and Josiah
are mean girls.

- You speak to me
condescendingly one more time,

I'm taking it to
----ing captain.

- Take it to him right now.
- No.

- She's not getting better.
She's almost getting worse.

- I'm not somebody
who's gonna eat sh--

with a knife and fork
and smile.

- If I have to solve
your problems,

what do I need you for?
- ----in Hunger Games.

- You don't know
what just happened.

- I just got my ass
chewed out by captain.

- You're gonna fire her,
or I'll quit.

- I'm not gonna be dealing
with this attitude.

- Yes, sir.
- I don't need this sh--.

- This is the most
shocking thing

that's ever happened to me.
- I can say whatever

the (BLEEP) I wanna say.
- I would just stop.

- I think the time has come.

I've decided
to make the split...

- They told me to tell you
you have one hour,

and you're leaving.

- (BLEEP)! (BLEEP)!
- Man overboard.

- What?
- Take it off now!

- Get the life ring!

- Aaah!

[dramatic chords]

- I-I need a minute.