Below Deck (2013–…): Season 4, Episode 5 - The Freak Comes Out at Night - full transcript
Sierra makes a decision following a tense night with Ben. Meanwhile Kelley is challenged with getting through the charter shorthanded. A new crew member joins Valor. Nico takes his pursuit ...
- Previously on "Below Deck"...
- Shut the f--- up, dude.
- Hey.
- Dude, get the f--- out
of the car!
- This isn't the right place
for you.
Pack your stuff
and leave the boat.
- Thank you, God.
- You're so adorable.
Emily, if something
should happen to my wife...
- Jesus.
This feels like D-list
Quentin Tarantino characters.
- Is this our anniversary
today?
- Yeah, made it
through our first week.
- Nico, girlfriend back home?
- We just recently
started talking.
- Oh, so it's just fresh.
- What about you there, Lauren?
- Single as a Pringle,
let's put it that way.
This is, like,
awkwardly romantic.
- Good night, Emily.
- Night, night.
- Battle is on.
No matter who wins,
friendship doesn't change.
- Oh, no, no.
- That tuna's f---ed.
Can you just take that away?
- Cannot deal with this.
I just want
to f---ing go home.
- Good morning.
- Morning.
- Oh, last day.
Back to reality.
- What's cracking, yo?
- We're working hard out here.
For real, though,
um, maybe have a chat
with Sierra today.
She, like, broke down
last night.
She was cleaning up
and she was just like,
"I don't know
if this is for me."
So she's thinking
about leaving.
- That would be f---ed.
Talk about two crew members
down.
- F---.
- She's just got to realize
Ben in the kitchen is brutal.
- Coming.
- Hey, baby.
- How'd you sleep?
All right?
- I didn't go to bed until,
like, 2:00,
but pretty good, though.
- Sierra freaked out last night.
- 12 courses
is really demanding.
I was intense.
It probably rubbed off
on Sierra.
Hopefully we're in better
frames of mind today
'cause there's a miraculous
thing called sleep.
- I don't want her
to become discouraged.
Maybe if you took her aside
and said, "You know,
"last night, there was
a lot going on.
You did a great job."
- Absolutely.
- Hi.
- Hey, baby.
- I miss you.
- I miss you too.
What's going on?
- It's been really crazy, Mom.
Like, the chef is
a really intense person.
I really flipped out because
I just was so overwhelmed.
- I'm pretty thick-skinned,
but at the same time, like,
I need to have positivity
around me.
- Yes, Mom.
- I love you.
- Love you too.
- Mostly bacon.
- I have a mascarpone
and smoked salmon omelet.
Would you like some?
- A little bit.
- All right, we're gonna have--
- That's fantastic
wrapping paper.
- I'm gonna give you
two sheets of uncut $2 bills.
- It's amazing.
- Hey, it's Sierra.
Where would you like me?
- Please turn over laundry.
- Copy.
- ♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
- Hey.
- Hey, baby.
- How are you?
- Good.
- I think I should be
more bashful
when delegating
a part of my job.
- All good.
- You good?
- Yeah. I'm just trying
to chill and stick to myself.
- We've all been there,
and I promise you,
I can't even f---ing explain
to you
how many times
I've been there.
We don't have to chat
about it.
- Yeah. Thanks.
- Yeah? Okay, cool. Cool.
- ♪ Are you eatin' my fruit?
Are you eatin' my fruit? ♪
- Mmm.
- Quit eating my fruit, Emily.
That papaya is so good.
- Is it?
- Mm-hmm.
- I already know that tomorrow
is gonna be f---ing epic.
- Ooh, Trevor's not here.
This is the first night out
we've had without him.
I'm not kidding myself.
Like, I have a crush on Nico.
Like, I feel like
he has a crush on me.
It's definitely mutual.
So I'm excited to see
where things go.
- So just to let you know,
there's a great bar near us
called Foxy's.
It's, like, a local favorite.
Does that sound fun?
- Let's go to Foxy's.
- Let's go to Foxy's.
- Perfect.
- Hi, how are you doing?
- I'm fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- So breakfast
is wrapping up.
The guests are going
off the boat.
You guys can both go
for a dip.
- Oh, yay.
- Nice, awesome. Thank you.
- Okay?
It always drove me crazy
when anybody ever thought
I was, like, too harsh
of a leader.
I'm actually really lenient.
Let me take my break now
so that while you guys
are swimming,
I'll be working.
- Okay.
- Finally, I have
two stewardesses
who are enthusiastic
and willing to learn,
and for that kind
of stewardess,
I will have all the time
in the world and be so patient.
I'll be back.
- Thank you.
- All right, Lauren.
- Attention, all crew,
all guests are off the boat.
- Emily and Sierra,
if you want to go for a swim,
now is the time.
- Captain, is it cool
if we join the girls
for a dip in the water?
- Roger that.
- Emily reminds me
of my ex, kind of.
Just, like, little, fun,
outgoing.
She's hot.
And if Kelley's not here
and if it's a competition
that he wants,
then it's a competition
that he gets.
- The battle is on.
Work first,
friendship second,
women third.
- I mean, he knows.
He knows that, you know,
I'm gonna win.
- Yeah.
Come on.
- All right, kids.
Guests want to come back,
so everybody
out of the pool.
- Hello, welcome back.
Can I get you anything to drink?
- Can I get a vodka
and something?
- Ken, you've got
some big arms.
You're like one of those
keg-throwing European guys.
- I can do push-ups.
- I can do, like, two.
- I think we should
make a bet.
You two guys
for a push-up contest.
- Okay, it's on.
Who loses gets a bikini wax.
We could do it in a V
for valor.
- Valor.
- I think I got you.
- No.
- Oh, that's cool.
- Seriously,
it's not gonna be pretty.
- Smell like lavender.
- It's, like, an old wives' tale
that people respond
to you better
if you put lavender oil
on your hair.
I'm an emotional person,
but I'm not gonna let
one temper tantrum
from a chef
derail me from what
I want to do.
- Well, I hope--
let's hope that works tonight.
- Kate, we were asking
about getting some bikini wax.
We're gonna have
a push-up competition,
and whoever wins loses...
- Okay.
- One of the ladies that's
with us gets to wax our chest.
- It's pretty cool.
It's not strange for yachts
to host spa parties.
So clearly, this yacht
has hosted one before.
And thankfully,
they left their wax.
- I'll know in, like,
the first one
if I'm gonna--okay.
- Okay. Legs.
- Okay.
- Okay, go.
- Two.
- It's like walruses mating.
- Seven.
I'm f---ed.
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
- All right.
- That's gotta be
heated up, right?
- Yeah.
- I'll get a little bit
of my back waxed
just to be a good sport too.
- Yeah, but we do it
on your ass then.
- No problem.
I got hair there too.
- Okay, we have vodka.
- Say good-bye to Jeremy.
- We have the mobile spa
coming out.
- How can you have
so much hair?
- It's very hot.
You're gonna put it
in the direction
the hair is growing.
and then pull
the opposite way.
- In the direction--
- Hurry before it melts.
- Just watch the nipples.
You'll rip a nipple off.
Not good.
- Aww.
- And you have to do it quick.
You have to let it rip.
- One, two.
- Just f---ing do it.
- Three!
- Ahh!
- Ugh, God.
- Rip fast.
- Ahh!
- Did it hurt?
- What the hell's
wrong with you?
- The look of pain
on Jeremy's face
broke my heart a little bit...
- Yeah, look, there is
blood coming out.
Now he's bleeding.
- Oh, my God.
- When I got done laughing.
- You did it.
- You deserve that.
Well done.
- I deserve a kiss
on the cheek.
- Yeah.
- Aww, well done.
Yeah!
- Now bless my back fat.
- Whoa.
- We're gonna need more wax.
Did you really
want to do it?
- Look at him.
Of course he wants to do it.
- Wow.
- Oh, my God.
- Why is Bigfoot
getting waxed right now?
- How does it look?
- It looks like sh--.
- Thank you.
- Wow. That's pretty impressive.
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.
You did not say that.
- Wow, that's quite demeaning.
I find as a female,
in life,
we're going to get comments
from men,
whether it be
walking down the street
and you get car honks,
or whether you're on a yacht
and you get a drunk man
asking to see your V.
It's always going--
you're going to get something.
Can I get anyone else
anything to drink?
- I'll just get some water.
- Water?
- Thank you.
- Okay.
- Ooh!
- Ah.
- Hi.
- Hello, love.
- Thank you very much
for inviting me.
God bless America.
Let's have f---ing fun.
- Truffle mash,
rib eye with lobster.
Okay, that's Dover sole
for Carolina.
- Oh, surf and turf.
- And for you,
we've got Dover sole.
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- This is the Chianti,
but if you want to start
a new wine after that,
we've got other options.
- What?
He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- Come in.
- This is the Chianti,
but if you want to start
a new wine after that,
we've got other options.
- Creepy is creepy,
and I can't wait
for these guests to leave.
He's like, "I'll try that wine."
I was like, "Certainly."
And he goes,
"And I'll try you too."
- No. Okay, Nico, so tonight
if I call you on the radio
and tell you that
zucchinis are burning,
that means you come ASAP
to my rescue.
- Please keep your zucchini
away from my oven.
- Deal.
That was so amazing.
- Mr. Chow liked it, right?
- They loved it, the guys.
- This is a very easy evening.
- Let's go to sleep.
- Yep.
- I'm so tired.
- No 12-course dinner.
And no tears in the galley.
Good night.
- Okay.
- You can start pulling
whenever you're ready.
- I love bacon.
God bless America.
- God bless America.
- For bacon.
- The anchor's home
and secure.
- Pull the snubber off
and let's get out of here.
- You guys don't even know
what's under this.
It's so gross.
Come here.
- Kate--
- Oh, God.
- Oh, my God.
- I love laminating things.
I think it's
the perfect gift.
- Oh, no, no, no. Oh, no.
- Oh, God. Oh, no. Okay.
- This channel keeps getting
smaller and smaller.
- Cap, you got 60 feet in
opening on your starboard aft.
- I tell you what,
if stupid could fly,
these guys would be
7-4s.
- Phew.
- Does it smell
like burned hair?
- It's disgusting.
- We're gonna present it
to our guest.
- Do it after the tip.
- Hey, we'll put
the stern line on first,
and the rest,
you'll hand to me.
No, no, no, no, no.
We're gonna hand it to you.
We'll worry about that later.
Can you hand me that line?
Jesus Christ.
This dude on the dock is
moving like a frickin' turtle.
Yeah, yeah, put the eyelet.
- Pull in that bowline.
- Way up there.
- Hey, Nico, Nico.
Can you come to the bow?
- Yeah, Kelley.
Hold on one second.
We need a spring here.
- Lauren?
- Yeah?
- Kelley, pull that forward
spring in a little bit, can you?
- Everything factors in, whether
it's the lines, the fenders.
To be down a man now, it's--
you know,
it could potentially lead
to damaging the boat
or having an accident.
- Hey, Captain,
I can't get that one.
It's underneath the spring.
I need someone up--
oh, f---.
Nico, can you come
to the bow?
- On my way, one second.
Take that off.
- Yep.
- I'm gonna jump back on
right now.
- Dude, don't jump off the boat
in the middle of docking.
Can't get the, uh...
- No worries, man.
- Abreast line.
Tighten that one up.
- Pull up on that.
- We can shut 'em down.
Attention all crew,
I need everybody
on the aft deck in ten.
- Deck crew acknowledges.
- Just got to...
I mean, they're f---ing
crinkled, whatever.
Really?
- Yeah.
- Okay, let's line 'em up.
- Hello.
It was great to meet you.
I hope you all enjoyed
your trip, okay.
- Thank you.
- Have safe travels home, okay.
- This is for the guys.
- Okay.
Jeremy, it was so lovely
having you on board.
- You--oh, my goodness.
Unbelievable.
- We made you
a little something.
- Thank you.
Thank you for this.
I'll remember this.
- I bet you will.
- Unbelievable.
I think I speak for everyone.
Amazing life experience.
- Fantastic job.
I was really looking forward
to tasting your cooking.
You did not disappoint.
- Thank you.
- You guys did
an amazing job.
We have something
for you, Captain.
- Oh.
- Thank you very much.
- Well, thank you.
- Well deserved.
- Thanks, Jeremy.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
- "Do you have anything
to declare?"
"Yes, uh, chest hair."
- Chest hair.
That's awesome.
- Let's get to work.
Flip the boat.
- Thanks.
- We gotta have a little talk.
- All right.
- Today when we were
coming in docking...
- Yeah.
- Just don't hop off
the boat again.
- Okay.
- Just in case
he gets blown off the dock
or something like that.
- Yeah. Sorry about that.
- Nico jumping off the boat
is a bad reflection on me.
The captain's watching me
like a hawk,
and after the sh-- show
that was Trevor,
I need the Captain to know
that I can run my deck team.
- 100% agree.
- Cool.
- And it won't happen again.
- Awesome.
- Attention all crew,
I need everybody
in the crew mess
in two minutes.
- Hello people.
- Hi.
- So I know we touched
on communication
in the last charter.
How'd that work out
in the interior?
Is it working better?
- Yep.
- Oh, yeah.
- I know you had a bit of a,
uh, wrench thrown into things
with the one guest who didn't
like anything in the world.
But it must have gone
fairly well because...
Strip club?
- Yeah.
- Oh, there we go.
- That looks pretty good.
- 20.
- Ho, ho, ho, ho.
- Split ten ways,
thank you, Trevor.
$2,000 apiece.
- Wow.
- From Jeremy having
his waxing done
to inappropriate attention,
we've definitely
earned this tip.
- You can go out
this evening.
And on that note,
you can all count 'em out
and give me a hand.
- One, two, three,
four, five.
Can we get leftover ones
that I can marry
with my leftover ones?
- Yes, I have six.
- What have you got?
What do you need?
- I have two ones left over.
Anybody?
- Here, I've got leftover ones.
- You've got 76?
- Here's 24.
That makes 100.
- This is not gonna be as easy
as I anticipated at all.
- Yeah, we killed it.
You killed it. We all killed it.
- I'm so happy right now.
Can't even mess with this
right here.
See this vibe going?
You could try to mess with it.
Try. I dare you.
- I don't want to try.
- No, no energy.
- I will lose
against your vibage.
- You can't, you can't.
- I will lose.
- You're gonna lose.
- I will lose.
- I really enjoy
working with Lauren.
She's just good vibes.
It's become like
a brother/sister bond.
- I always sat next to a guy
in class
who used to pick his scabs
and eat it.
And he would take it all off
so it's like one big corn flake
and just, like...
- She's super open with me,
and I'm super open with her,
and it's just a friendship
that's forming
into something really nice.
This is a zone.
- Yeah.
- It's a bubble.
- Yeah,
and it cannot be popped.
- I don't know what's going on
between Nico and Lauren.
I think for Nico,
Lauren's been friend-zoned.
I'm not sure
Lauren's aware of that.
- Kate, Ben, and Kelley,
I need all three of you
in the crew mess in two.
- Kelley and Ben rogers.
- Copy.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Charter four. We have
Marc Empey and Heidi Homme
on a family retreat.
They each have two daughters
from previous marriages.
Kinda like "The Brady Bunch."
- "Brady Bunch."
- Yeah.
- They look so sweet.
- She's limited
on most seafood.
- That's about as wild
as it's gonna get.
We've got no weirdos.
They want to take advantage
of all the water toys
that are on the yacht.
- Roger that.
- And they would like
an all-white dinner party.
- Love.
- And we have a new
deckhand coming.
- Oh, really?
- Be here in the morning.
Kyle Adam Dixon.
- That's a very artistic
profile pic.
- Oh, wow.
- Staring off into a horizon.
- And what is that
in his right hand?
- It's an apple.
- A happy napple.
It's an apple.
- He is a little green.
- I can work with green.
- He does have some
white boat experience.
Not a lot, but the labor pool
when you don't have
a lot of time to waste
gets smaller and smaller.
- Either he's got
the best sense of humor ever,
or he's weird.
- Let's go to work.
- Nico, Lauren, you wanna come
down to my cabin for just a sec?
- Copy.
- Uh, so yeah, we will be
getting our new deckhand.
He's former British Army.
He's pretty green.
- Is he?
- Yeah.
- If he accepts that he's green,
then it'll be fine,
but if he's green with attitude,
then we're gonna have a problem.
- Well, he's either gonna be
a nob or he's not.
- Yeah.
- We'll see.
- What's going on?
- I know something's wrong.
I know her so well.
- What's she doing?
- She just sent me a voice mail,
freaked out.
- What?
- 'Cause she, like, was like,
"Oh, okay, bye.
Love ya."
And she was like, "F---.
Like, I said love."
There's a difference
between "love ya"
and "I love you."
- Yeah, yeah.
- Huge.
- I'm thrilled to bits
that Kate's happy with Ro.
I think being in love
takes a certain maturity.
And I'm not sure that
I've ever really been there.
It's when they look
into your eyes
and say, "I love you."
That's when you know
you're truly buggered.
- That's when you know it's
about to go downhill real fast.
- Real quick.
- Like that.
We'd like four 50/50
each cup, okay?
- But we don't want to put
anyone with 49 and, you know,
"Oh, f---."
The number one rule
of yachting
is just don't screw
the crew.
When you start getting feelings
for someone,
it's like, "Ugh, sh--."
It's confusing.
- That PK's gone
right to the dome, isn't it?
Yeah.
- I'd wear something
long-sleeve
'cause it's gonna be cold
on the way back.
- Wow, look at you
all dolled up.
- Look at you.
- Huh, you look nice.
- You look very nice.
- We're gonna have
such a good night tonight.
- About to go and get...
- The girls are all
in black tonight.
- Ciao.
- Oh, we're going to sit here.
Yeah.
- Where are you going?
And it looks like--
Yeah.
- Currently my relationship
status is, uh, undefined.
Before I left, I was talking
to someone back home,
but they don't call me Freako
for nothing.
There's a reason.
- I honestly can't figure out
what's going on
with Nico and Lauren.
Like, are they friends?
Are they more than friends?
Should they be
more than friends?
I think it's kind of hard
for them to even decide.
- We're here.
- Ooh.
- Off the boat.
- Thank you.
- Off the boat.
- Thank you.
- Go for it.
- Lauren.
- I'm gonna help you
anyways.
- Oh, f---.
- Good evening,
welcome to The Rock Cafe.
- Ooh, lobster tank.
- Just look at those spines.
- So pretty.
- Ooh, it is nice here,
isn't it?
- I'll take a gin and tonic.
- That sounds really good,
actually.
- Can I have a vodka,
fresh lime, and soda water?
- What kind of apps
are we into, guys? Anything?
- Bruschetta.
- Okay.
- Easy to share.
- Em, you want to split one?
- Yeah.
- Let's get it on.
- I'm actually good
for drink, thank you.
- You're not getting
a drink?
- What?
- I'm putting you in charge.
If she comes,
that with fettuccine.
- Sure.
- Well...
Sit down here.
Have a laugh.
It's actually really nice
in here.
- Nico's coming in hot,
and I respect that.
But this is like
the tortoise and the hare.
I'm the tortoise.
I'm gonna play the long game.
- Hey, baby.
Oh, cheeky.
- That looks beautiful.
- I'll share, guys.
- Thank you.
Amazing.
- Yeah.
Amazing.
- How's your food?
- Really impressive.
- What'd you get?
- You got the calamari again.
Clever.
- Yeah.
- What the f---?
I don't know what's
going on with Lauren.
- Yeah.
- I'll lead the way, boys.
Let's make bad decisions.
- No, come with me.
- No, really.
- Don't sulk.
- What do you think?
I say something,
and she just ignores me.
- I know something's wrong.
I know her energy.
I know her so well.
- Well, she likes you, man.
So just--just trust me
on this, um...
- Ugh, Lauren,
Lauren, Lauren.
I feel so bad for her that
I don't have those feelings,
and the last thing
I want to do is hurt her.
- This type of emotion will just
blow over, and she'll get it.
- I would never want
to hurt her.
- All right, big guy.
- Come on, let's go.
- We're gonna make sure
you have fun.
Let's just get
in a better place--
- I'm not gonna have
fun tonight.
- Yeah, you are.
Look at me.
- What do you mean
if they're having fun?
- You know what
I'm talking about.
- Who? Him and Emily?
- Lis--I don't want
to talk about it.
- No, no, no, no.
- CocoMaya,
Asian Latino fusion.
- Nico and I are still
getting to know each other,
but he's a very interesting
character,
and he's quite attractive.
- Nico! Nico!
- I feel, like, embarrassed
within myself
that I thought we were
on the same page,
and then now he's flirting
with Emily,
and I just had no idea
that was even
anything on his mind.
It just--
it's painful to watch, really.
Like...
Okay.
- Dude.
- F---.
- Oops.
I disapprove of anyone
making moves on people
when they have
other connections.
I love you all.
- Good evening.
- Yeah.
- All right, off.
- Okay, sounds good.
- We need to get off.
- Lauren, you good?
- Good night, guys.
- Good night, hon.
What?
What?
No, Nico, no.
I go in my room,
Nico knocks on my door.
And he's like, "Come here."
And I'm like, "Oh, what? What?"
Like, "What do you have
to tell me?"
He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- I think he's just confused.
- Come in.
Hello.
- This is your other deckhand.
- I was on motor yacht "Milo."
I spent a bit of time
in Monaco
and the south of France.
I've been doing
offshore suppling,
working on fishing trawlers
since then.
- What?
- We're not in Kansas anymore.
- No.
- He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried to...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- I don't--I'm not that kind of
girl, and you got a girlfriend.
- Oh, really?
- What?
- Kelley told me
you had a girlfriend.
- I'm going to bed.
Good night.
- I think he's just confused.
- All crew, all crew,
anybody in the crew mess
who can help me
with provisions?
- I hate provisions so much.
- I don't want to see Nico
this morning.
I don't want to talk
about it.
I don't want him
to give me that look
that's like, "Hey, you okay?"
It's like I do--
I just want--let's just get up
and just go to work.
- I don't know when
our new deckhand is showing up.
I thought he was gonna
be here at 8:00.
- Hiya.
Do you want to do a cover?
- Sweating out
the toxins.
- You were pretty sauced up.
- Woke up,
still had my clothes on.
Didn't have anyone else
in my bed.
- You almost did.
- Yeah, I tried making out
with everyone.
- There was only Nico up there,
but he was so drunk.
And then we came down
to the crew area,
and he tried to kiss me.
- What?
- He tried to kiss me.
- No.
- Yes, as soon as we got back.
- As soon as you got back?
- Yes.
His name's Freako.
But I know that's not
who he is.
He doesn't--he's not, like,
a bad guy.
He's not trying
to, like, play us all.
He just wanted
to get a little kiss.
- I thought he was getting on
really well with Lauren
on the exterior as well.
- I don't know
what the deal is there.
- I just want to kinda clarify
where we stand,
and I don't want to hurt
her feelings ever, you know.
I care about her a lot.
- Yeah.
- Just not in a sexual way,
you know.
- You gotta be real careful
with that.
When Lauren and Nico
work together,
they're like best friends.
And for a girl to act that way
around a guy,
no matter how cool she says
she is and how she's a bro,
she's not.
Like, girls catch feelings.
As long as it doesn't
affect work,
I'm gonna let y'all handle it.
- Yeah, yeah, no.
I mean, there's no need for it
to affect our work,
and it's not going to.
- Like, what was he thinking?
- Freako Nico.
- How's it going?
- Great.
- Isn't it great?
- I know.
- I couldn't wait to get out
of bed today, it's so great.
- I jumped out like this,
"Hello, good morning."
Sarcastic.
- Hi, pal, how you doing?
- Good, how are you?
- Kyle.
- Kelley.
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
- Is the Captain about?
- Yeah, you're the new deckhand,
I'm guessing.
- Yeah, I believe so, yeah.
- All right.
Come on, follow me.
- Captain.
- How are you?
- I'm all right, how are you?
- I'm good. Welcome aboard.
My view on beards,
obviously I have one.
I like 'em short and trimmed
and well-groomed.
- Yeah.
- So you haven't done much
white boat work, huh?
For a while.
- Mm-hmm.
- I spent a bit of time in
Monaco and the south of France.
- What?
That's a crazy British accent,
ya wanker.
- We're starting out right away
with a charter on board
in about three hours.
So if you want to take him down,
get him settled in,
and then put him to work.
- All right, will do, Captain.
- Cheers.
We're not in Kansas anymore.
- No.
So working on a trawler,
it's a very dangerous job.
So for me, getting
into yachting is better
because, number one,
there's women on the boat.
And, number two,
it's not deadly.
So it kinda sums it up for me
that it's a better option.
- This will be your cabin.
Nico's your roommate.
He'll be on top.
- Yeah.
- We'll change over
and then put you to work.
- I'm happy with that. Awesome.
- All right, cool.
Sierra, can I get his uniforms?
- You want the whole bag?
- Yep. Thank you.
- Yeah?
- Ah, it's Kelley.
Here you go, bud.
- Awesome.
Cheers, pal.
- Did you meet
the new deckhand, Captain?
- Mm-hmm.
- And?
- Way too early.
- Here's your radio.
- Sweet.
- Hi, you guys all right?
- Hi.
- Kyle, nice to meet you.
- Apple?
I got it for you.
- I'll take it.
- What's the deal
with the CV photo?
I want to know now.
- I'll explain it, so...
I had a photo of me just posing
on a yacht with an apple,
and I--I liked that one.
I'll give it a go.
And here I am,
so maybe the apple worked.
- Hey, yeah.
- I love it.
- I can barely understand
one word he says,
and I'm from England.
- I'm gonna crack on.
- All right, man. Yeah.
- Awesome. Cheers, pal.
- Stop by anytime, bro.
- So this is
your other deckhand.
- Hi.
- Hi, you all right?
- Lauren.
- Yeah, Lauren.
Nice to meet you. Hi, Kyle.
- Kyle. Absolute pleasure.
- Where's Nico?
- I have no idea.
- Hey, Em.
- Hello.
- Um...I wanted to apologize
for my actions last night.
I was--I think I drank
a little bit too much.
It was a little bit
inappropriate.
- I don't think it's
very fair that you
try and make out with Sierra
and myself.
- Yeah.
- None of us should be made
to feel like you were just
trying to get
with the easiest girl.
- Yeah.
I'm really sorry about that.
I kind of got caught up
in the fun,
and Freako gets me in trouble
sometimes.
- How's your head feeling
this morning?
Yeah.
It's getting a beating.
- Has the boat lost a bit
of respect for Nico,
out of interest?
- Yeah, kind of.
- Really?
- Yeah, 'cause he tried making
out with every stewardess.
But you'll give him
extra respect for that,
so I understand
why you're confused.
- Yeah, I know.
- Hey, man, how's it going?
- How you doing? You all right?
- Yeah, Nico.
- Kyle. Absolute pleasure.
- Kyle.
Nice to meet you as well.
- Well, go ahead
and get with Nico.
It's just a little tidy-up right
now before the guests get here.
- All right.
Okay.
- So where are you from?
- Manchester.
- Oh, nice.
- I live in London.
- Oh, my daughter
lives in London.
- Your?
- Daughter.
I met ex missus
quite rapidly on a pub crawl,
and we had a child
unexpectedly.
- Are you jet-lagged at all?
- I'm all right.
I FaceTimed my daughter
when I landed.
I got to watch her eat raisins
for ten minutes today.
That was--that was nice.
So what do you want me
to do right now?
- Maybe just, like, go over the
stainless just with a chamois,
make sure there's no,
like, water spots.
- Okay, and the chamois
are in that locker?
- Um, yeah.
Check it out. Go through it.
Check out the materials
that we got,
and if you
have any questions--
- Port side or starboard?
- Starboard side, aft.
- Right.
- It's just kind of weird
right now with Lauren.
Just--we just
need to fix this.
- These guys are not gluten free
or lactose intolerant.
- No matter what, they're gonna
be better than the last group.
- You gonna be ready
five, ten minutes?
- Yeah.
- I just want you to go
in the laz with Nico
to open up all the hatches,
find every tool we've got,
and make me a list.
- Yep.
Nico, what a f---ing idiot.
- She told him off
for trying to kiss her
after he tried to kiss me.
- What the f---?
Not cool. Not cool.
- I just hope everything's
all right with us.
- I guess I want to know what
the f--- you were thinking.
- She told him off
for trying to kiss her
after he tried to kiss me.
- What the f---?
Boy, you did not make
any smart moves.
I know Nico
was wasted last night,
but I can't believe he tried
to kiss Emily and Sierra.
He's just not the guy
that I thought he was.
- Lauren.
- Yeah.
- Game time.
- All right.
- So what's up, chica?
- Hey.
- How you feeling today?
- Fine. You know.
- Yeah, you know, I just hope
everything's all right with us.
You seemed really stressed out,
like, you know, I--
- Yeah, I guess I wanna know
what the f---
you were thinking?
- Just, you know,
f---ing alcohol, man.
You know, I got super drunk.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, we all were
pretty drunk,
but when we sat at the table,
you weren't really,
like, talking to me at all,
so I just felt like maybe
I did something to upset you.
You know, I don't want
anything to change.
We work really well.
You know what I'm trying to say?
- I know, yeah.
- You know?
- It's a bit
of a smack in the face
to know that you've
just been "friend zoned,"
but I'm good at just
putting it aside
and just hoping that
the feelings will just
trickle away with time.
We know where we stand.
We know how f---ing good
we are together.
- I'm glad that we're okay.
- We're good.
You can't get through us.
We're good and we're sweet.
- We're cool.
- I'm sorry.
What was your name again?
- Kyle.
- Kyle?
What you doing?
- Ironing.
- I don't mind.
It's just 'cause, uh, I thought
you guys were a bit busy,
so I just thought I'd do it
'cause I've got
some time to burn.
- Okay, well--
- Unless you--
do you wanna do it or--
- No, I'd love
to see your skills, though,
so I'll let you do
these one pants
and maybe the captain's.
- Oh, I can see this now.
Delegation.
- Maybe.
- To delegate is to inspire.
- That's a high honor
to iron the captain's pants.
- Attention all crew,
we have 30 minutes
until guest arrival.
- I don't think your feet
have seen sunlight
in, like, four years.
That's a good-size boat.
- All right, they're coming on.
- Welcome aboard.
- Thank you.
Got a perfect day.
- Captain Lee.
- Hello.
- Hi there. Welcome.
- Hi. How are you?
Captain Lee.
- I'm good. I'm Claire.
- Megan.
- Hi.
- Kelley.
- Nice to meet you, Kelley.
- Marc, Heidi,
welcome aboard "Valor."
We've got a lot of fun
in store for you.
Kate will show you
to your rooms,
and we'll get out of here
and get this party going.
- All right, whoo!
Ready.
- Right this way.
- Thank you.
- My pleasure.
So this is the main salon.
- Ooh.
- This boat was recently refit,
so all of this is brand-new.
This is our master, and
the bathroom is quite large.
- I'll just load 'em
up here with you?
- Yeah.
- There's a bathtub,
a huge shower.
- You don't get that everywhere.
- And then we're gonna go
to sun deck.
- Oh, wow.
- So we've got a Jacuzzi.
And then we call this
the bunny pad.
It's great for laying out
while we're under way.
- Gorgeous.
- Okay, let's go.
Bow to stern starting now.
Let's go ahead
and get the bowlines off.
- The spring line,
you're gonna drop.
The breast line,
you're gonna bring up.
- That goes to the mom.
This goes to the dad.
- So it's like drop
spring first
and just pull that
one in, yeah?
- Go ahead and uncoil it off.
- I got one line standing here.
Let's get it off.
- Okay, Cap.
All lines clear astern.
- All right,
we're coming out of here.
- This is awesome.
- Yeah, it's ridiculous.
- Kyle was sent from heaven.
- We're all meshing very well;
we're doing our job well.
It's awesome.
- Can I get anybody a refill
or something to drink
besides champagne?
- A Captain and Sprite
for me, please.
- How hungry are y'all?
You want to do lunch
around 2:00?
- Can I get another mojito,
please?
- Mojito, yeah, of course.
- Thank you.
- As long as they have
cocktails, they can do--
They don't care.
- My kind of people.
- I think this primary
has accepted his fate
that he's gonna be surrounded
by drunk women all the time,
and he handles it with grace.
Ben.
- Yes.
- I asked them if they would
like lunch around 2:00.
Is that good for you?
- Okay. So they're not like,
"Oh, we're really hungry" or--
- No, they're like,
"Hey, who needs food
when you've got drinks?"
- She wants to try mojitos,
but she hates mojitos.
- It tastes like salad
in your drink, bro.
- No, it doesn't.
- Why do I want to eat my drink?
- No, thank you.
- Hi, Kyle. I'm Sierra.
I know we met earlier.
- Been very busy, so I haven't
bothered you all day.
- Yeah, I felt like
I was dying earlier,
and then I got really busy.
Busy's good, though; I feel
like it makes the time go by
and, like, the way these
charters are set up,
like, it just flies.
- So where's all,
like, the treats?
Where's the fat food?
- The fat food?
Oh, you can, like, face me.
Face me and then, like, under
that cabinet, like, under--
- We just met, Sierra; you're
making me bend over already.
- No, no, you can just,
like, lean.
- Sierra's looking nice.
She's just exactly what I need.
She's very, like, cold weather,
like, Norwegian.
And I'm a Viking.
So she can come sailing with me
anytime.
- If you and Claire got in
a fight, like a fistfight--
- Like a fistfight? I feel like
we're both scrappy as f---.
- So, Ben, what are you
making for lunch?
- Asparagus salad
with roast beet,
goat cheese,
Mediterranean sea bass,
and I'm gonna go in strong
with a potato salad.
- Yeah.
- Trufflize the hell out of it.
- Oh, boy.
- Give me three shots.
- Roger, three shots.
- Lock it down at three.
You're good.
- Those tie up at the top there
like that?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, perfect.
- Kyle seems really cool.
- So nice.
Very nice.
- Somebody needs to get
lucky on this boat.
- There's a lot of sexual
tension on the boat.
Emily should just take
her pick.
Someone. Whatever.
All of them.
I don't care.
- Whoo!
- You all right, Kyle?
- Is he all right?
What happened?
- You all right?
- F---ing hell.
- Oh, my God.
- Holy sh--.
- F---.
- Hey, Kyle, go throw on your
swim shorts and rash guard.
- So just to let you know,
Ben's starting
to platter up lunch,
and I've got the table set
downstairs
whenever you guys are ready.
- Okay, terrific.
Downstairs for lunch.
- Get started
on getting the toys in.
- We're already on it,
Captain.
- Thank you, sir.
- No, we gotta go out this way,
right?
- That's the way.
- There it is.
- Got you.
This is the first time
I've ever been
to the Caribbean,
and I'm so excited to be here.
I'm in the BVIs, man.
You know?
And I'm getting somewhere
in my life.
It's great.
- Would you like
some potato salad?
- Yes, I would.
Great.
- Goat cheese, kiwi,
roasted beets.
- Ooh, beets. I see beets.
- Goat cheese.
- Ben gets an A on this one.
- Kids are messed up.
- Who raised us?
- Not me.
- It's actually
kind of surprising to me
that these parents
are encouraging and allowing
their daughters
to drink so much.
- Kit Kats and Coors Light.
Killing it.
- I want them
to remember their vacation,
so maybe it's time
we start serving them
a little bit lighter drinks.
- You like it.
You like it.
- Look at that.
Whoo!
- So one of those in each bag
and then we'll give you these
lighter ones afterwards.
- All right.
- F---.
- You all right, Kyle?
- Is he all right?
What happened?
- You all right?
- F---. F---ing hell.
- Oh, my God.
- Holy sh--.
Did he dislocate his shoulder?
- Next on "Below Deck"...
- Oh, Ro's coming to visit.
- Who the f--- is that?
What?
- Oh, my God, Ben is, like,
hating his life right now.
- Come on.
- I need to cool off.
- Whoa!
- I like my girls tiny,
like, "Oh,
I'm gonna protect you."
- What are you doing?
Kelley.
- You do realize, though,
that I find you very attractive?
You're stunning,
absolutely beautiful.
Kelley, Kelley, Lee.
I've been looking
at dirty f---ing windows
for three f---ing days.
- That's all inside.
- Do you really want
to go to war on this?
I want it done.
- They're properly
sauced up now, right?
- They're drinking at a rate
that even impresses
and scares me.
- Oh!
- Whoo!
- You guys are over the reef.
- For more info, go to:
- Shut the f--- up, dude.
- Hey.
- Dude, get the f--- out
of the car!
- This isn't the right place
for you.
Pack your stuff
and leave the boat.
- Thank you, God.
- You're so adorable.
Emily, if something
should happen to my wife...
- Jesus.
This feels like D-list
Quentin Tarantino characters.
- Is this our anniversary
today?
- Yeah, made it
through our first week.
- Nico, girlfriend back home?
- We just recently
started talking.
- Oh, so it's just fresh.
- What about you there, Lauren?
- Single as a Pringle,
let's put it that way.
This is, like,
awkwardly romantic.
- Good night, Emily.
- Night, night.
- Battle is on.
No matter who wins,
friendship doesn't change.
- Oh, no, no.
- That tuna's f---ed.
Can you just take that away?
- Cannot deal with this.
I just want
to f---ing go home.
- Good morning.
- Morning.
- Oh, last day.
Back to reality.
- What's cracking, yo?
- We're working hard out here.
For real, though,
um, maybe have a chat
with Sierra today.
She, like, broke down
last night.
She was cleaning up
and she was just like,
"I don't know
if this is for me."
So she's thinking
about leaving.
- That would be f---ed.
Talk about two crew members
down.
- F---.
- She's just got to realize
Ben in the kitchen is brutal.
- Coming.
- Hey, baby.
- How'd you sleep?
All right?
- I didn't go to bed until,
like, 2:00,
but pretty good, though.
- Sierra freaked out last night.
- 12 courses
is really demanding.
I was intense.
It probably rubbed off
on Sierra.
Hopefully we're in better
frames of mind today
'cause there's a miraculous
thing called sleep.
- I don't want her
to become discouraged.
Maybe if you took her aside
and said, "You know,
"last night, there was
a lot going on.
You did a great job."
- Absolutely.
- Hi.
- Hey, baby.
- I miss you.
- I miss you too.
What's going on?
- It's been really crazy, Mom.
Like, the chef is
a really intense person.
I really flipped out because
I just was so overwhelmed.
- I'm pretty thick-skinned,
but at the same time, like,
I need to have positivity
around me.
- Yes, Mom.
- I love you.
- Love you too.
- Mostly bacon.
- I have a mascarpone
and smoked salmon omelet.
Would you like some?
- A little bit.
- All right, we're gonna have--
- That's fantastic
wrapping paper.
- I'm gonna give you
two sheets of uncut $2 bills.
- It's amazing.
- Hey, it's Sierra.
Where would you like me?
- Please turn over laundry.
- Copy.
- ♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
- Hey.
- Hey, baby.
- How are you?
- Good.
- I think I should be
more bashful
when delegating
a part of my job.
- All good.
- You good?
- Yeah. I'm just trying
to chill and stick to myself.
- We've all been there,
and I promise you,
I can't even f---ing explain
to you
how many times
I've been there.
We don't have to chat
about it.
- Yeah. Thanks.
- Yeah? Okay, cool. Cool.
- ♪ Are you eatin' my fruit?
Are you eatin' my fruit? ♪
- Mmm.
- Quit eating my fruit, Emily.
That papaya is so good.
- Is it?
- Mm-hmm.
- I already know that tomorrow
is gonna be f---ing epic.
- Ooh, Trevor's not here.
This is the first night out
we've had without him.
I'm not kidding myself.
Like, I have a crush on Nico.
Like, I feel like
he has a crush on me.
It's definitely mutual.
So I'm excited to see
where things go.
- So just to let you know,
there's a great bar near us
called Foxy's.
It's, like, a local favorite.
Does that sound fun?
- Let's go to Foxy's.
- Let's go to Foxy's.
- Perfect.
- Hi, how are you doing?
- I'm fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- So breakfast
is wrapping up.
The guests are going
off the boat.
You guys can both go
for a dip.
- Oh, yay.
- Nice, awesome. Thank you.
- Okay?
It always drove me crazy
when anybody ever thought
I was, like, too harsh
of a leader.
I'm actually really lenient.
Let me take my break now
so that while you guys
are swimming,
I'll be working.
- Okay.
- Finally, I have
two stewardesses
who are enthusiastic
and willing to learn,
and for that kind
of stewardess,
I will have all the time
in the world and be so patient.
I'll be back.
- Thank you.
- All right, Lauren.
- Attention, all crew,
all guests are off the boat.
- Emily and Sierra,
if you want to go for a swim,
now is the time.
- Captain, is it cool
if we join the girls
for a dip in the water?
- Roger that.
- Emily reminds me
of my ex, kind of.
Just, like, little, fun,
outgoing.
She's hot.
And if Kelley's not here
and if it's a competition
that he wants,
then it's a competition
that he gets.
- The battle is on.
Work first,
friendship second,
women third.
- I mean, he knows.
He knows that, you know,
I'm gonna win.
- Yeah.
Come on.
- All right, kids.
Guests want to come back,
so everybody
out of the pool.
- Hello, welcome back.
Can I get you anything to drink?
- Can I get a vodka
and something?
- Ken, you've got
some big arms.
You're like one of those
keg-throwing European guys.
- I can do push-ups.
- I can do, like, two.
- I think we should
make a bet.
You two guys
for a push-up contest.
- Okay, it's on.
Who loses gets a bikini wax.
We could do it in a V
for valor.
- Valor.
- I think I got you.
- No.
- Oh, that's cool.
- Seriously,
it's not gonna be pretty.
- Smell like lavender.
- It's, like, an old wives' tale
that people respond
to you better
if you put lavender oil
on your hair.
I'm an emotional person,
but I'm not gonna let
one temper tantrum
from a chef
derail me from what
I want to do.
- Well, I hope--
let's hope that works tonight.
- Kate, we were asking
about getting some bikini wax.
We're gonna have
a push-up competition,
and whoever wins loses...
- Okay.
- One of the ladies that's
with us gets to wax our chest.
- It's pretty cool.
It's not strange for yachts
to host spa parties.
So clearly, this yacht
has hosted one before.
And thankfully,
they left their wax.
- I'll know in, like,
the first one
if I'm gonna--okay.
- Okay. Legs.
- Okay.
- Okay, go.
- Two.
- It's like walruses mating.
- Seven.
I'm f---ed.
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
- All right.
- That's gotta be
heated up, right?
- Yeah.
- I'll get a little bit
of my back waxed
just to be a good sport too.
- Yeah, but we do it
on your ass then.
- No problem.
I got hair there too.
- Okay, we have vodka.
- Say good-bye to Jeremy.
- We have the mobile spa
coming out.
- How can you have
so much hair?
- It's very hot.
You're gonna put it
in the direction
the hair is growing.
and then pull
the opposite way.
- In the direction--
- Hurry before it melts.
- Just watch the nipples.
You'll rip a nipple off.
Not good.
- Aww.
- And you have to do it quick.
You have to let it rip.
- One, two.
- Just f---ing do it.
- Three!
- Ahh!
- Ugh, God.
- Rip fast.
- Ahh!
- Did it hurt?
- What the hell's
wrong with you?
- The look of pain
on Jeremy's face
broke my heart a little bit...
- Yeah, look, there is
blood coming out.
Now he's bleeding.
- Oh, my God.
- When I got done laughing.
- You did it.
- You deserve that.
Well done.
- I deserve a kiss
on the cheek.
- Yeah.
- Aww, well done.
Yeah!
- Now bless my back fat.
- Whoa.
- We're gonna need more wax.
Did you really
want to do it?
- Look at him.
Of course he wants to do it.
- Wow.
- Oh, my God.
- Why is Bigfoot
getting waxed right now?
- How does it look?
- It looks like sh--.
- Thank you.
- Wow. That's pretty impressive.
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.
You did not say that.
- Wow, that's quite demeaning.
I find as a female,
in life,
we're going to get comments
from men,
whether it be
walking down the street
and you get car honks,
or whether you're on a yacht
and you get a drunk man
asking to see your V.
It's always going--
you're going to get something.
Can I get anyone else
anything to drink?
- I'll just get some water.
- Water?
- Thank you.
- Okay.
- Ooh!
- Ah.
- Hi.
- Hello, love.
- Thank you very much
for inviting me.
God bless America.
Let's have f---ing fun.
- Truffle mash,
rib eye with lobster.
Okay, that's Dover sole
for Carolina.
- Oh, surf and turf.
- And for you,
we've got Dover sole.
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- This is the Chianti,
but if you want to start
a new wine after that,
we've got other options.
- What?
He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- Come in.
- This is the Chianti,
but if you want to start
a new wine after that,
we've got other options.
- Creepy is creepy,
and I can't wait
for these guests to leave.
He's like, "I'll try that wine."
I was like, "Certainly."
And he goes,
"And I'll try you too."
- No. Okay, Nico, so tonight
if I call you on the radio
and tell you that
zucchinis are burning,
that means you come ASAP
to my rescue.
- Please keep your zucchini
away from my oven.
- Deal.
That was so amazing.
- Mr. Chow liked it, right?
- They loved it, the guys.
- This is a very easy evening.
- Let's go to sleep.
- Yep.
- I'm so tired.
- No 12-course dinner.
And no tears in the galley.
Good night.
- Okay.
- You can start pulling
whenever you're ready.
- I love bacon.
God bless America.
- God bless America.
- For bacon.
- The anchor's home
and secure.
- Pull the snubber off
and let's get out of here.
- You guys don't even know
what's under this.
It's so gross.
Come here.
- Kate--
- Oh, God.
- Oh, my God.
- I love laminating things.
I think it's
the perfect gift.
- Oh, no, no, no. Oh, no.
- Oh, God. Oh, no. Okay.
- This channel keeps getting
smaller and smaller.
- Cap, you got 60 feet in
opening on your starboard aft.
- I tell you what,
if stupid could fly,
these guys would be
7-4s.
- Phew.
- Does it smell
like burned hair?
- It's disgusting.
- We're gonna present it
to our guest.
- Do it after the tip.
- Hey, we'll put
the stern line on first,
and the rest,
you'll hand to me.
No, no, no, no, no.
We're gonna hand it to you.
We'll worry about that later.
Can you hand me that line?
Jesus Christ.
This dude on the dock is
moving like a frickin' turtle.
Yeah, yeah, put the eyelet.
- Pull in that bowline.
- Way up there.
- Hey, Nico, Nico.
Can you come to the bow?
- Yeah, Kelley.
Hold on one second.
We need a spring here.
- Lauren?
- Yeah?
- Kelley, pull that forward
spring in a little bit, can you?
- Everything factors in, whether
it's the lines, the fenders.
To be down a man now, it's--
you know,
it could potentially lead
to damaging the boat
or having an accident.
- Hey, Captain,
I can't get that one.
It's underneath the spring.
I need someone up--
oh, f---.
Nico, can you come
to the bow?
- On my way, one second.
Take that off.
- Yep.
- I'm gonna jump back on
right now.
- Dude, don't jump off the boat
in the middle of docking.
Can't get the, uh...
- No worries, man.
- Abreast line.
Tighten that one up.
- Pull up on that.
- We can shut 'em down.
Attention all crew,
I need everybody
on the aft deck in ten.
- Deck crew acknowledges.
- Just got to...
I mean, they're f---ing
crinkled, whatever.
Really?
- Yeah.
- Okay, let's line 'em up.
- Hello.
It was great to meet you.
I hope you all enjoyed
your trip, okay.
- Thank you.
- Have safe travels home, okay.
- This is for the guys.
- Okay.
Jeremy, it was so lovely
having you on board.
- You--oh, my goodness.
Unbelievable.
- We made you
a little something.
- Thank you.
Thank you for this.
I'll remember this.
- I bet you will.
- Unbelievable.
I think I speak for everyone.
Amazing life experience.
- Fantastic job.
I was really looking forward
to tasting your cooking.
You did not disappoint.
- Thank you.
- You guys did
an amazing job.
We have something
for you, Captain.
- Oh.
- Thank you very much.
- Well, thank you.
- Well deserved.
- Thanks, Jeremy.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
- "Do you have anything
to declare?"
"Yes, uh, chest hair."
- Chest hair.
That's awesome.
- Let's get to work.
Flip the boat.
- Thanks.
- We gotta have a little talk.
- All right.
- Today when we were
coming in docking...
- Yeah.
- Just don't hop off
the boat again.
- Okay.
- Just in case
he gets blown off the dock
or something like that.
- Yeah. Sorry about that.
- Nico jumping off the boat
is a bad reflection on me.
The captain's watching me
like a hawk,
and after the sh-- show
that was Trevor,
I need the Captain to know
that I can run my deck team.
- 100% agree.
- Cool.
- And it won't happen again.
- Awesome.
- Attention all crew,
I need everybody
in the crew mess
in two minutes.
- Hello people.
- Hi.
- So I know we touched
on communication
in the last charter.
How'd that work out
in the interior?
Is it working better?
- Yep.
- Oh, yeah.
- I know you had a bit of a,
uh, wrench thrown into things
with the one guest who didn't
like anything in the world.
But it must have gone
fairly well because...
Strip club?
- Yeah.
- Oh, there we go.
- That looks pretty good.
- 20.
- Ho, ho, ho, ho.
- Split ten ways,
thank you, Trevor.
$2,000 apiece.
- Wow.
- From Jeremy having
his waxing done
to inappropriate attention,
we've definitely
earned this tip.
- You can go out
this evening.
And on that note,
you can all count 'em out
and give me a hand.
- One, two, three,
four, five.
Can we get leftover ones
that I can marry
with my leftover ones?
- Yes, I have six.
- What have you got?
What do you need?
- I have two ones left over.
Anybody?
- Here, I've got leftover ones.
- You've got 76?
- Here's 24.
That makes 100.
- This is not gonna be as easy
as I anticipated at all.
- Yeah, we killed it.
You killed it. We all killed it.
- I'm so happy right now.
Can't even mess with this
right here.
See this vibe going?
You could try to mess with it.
Try. I dare you.
- I don't want to try.
- No, no energy.
- I will lose
against your vibage.
- You can't, you can't.
- I will lose.
- You're gonna lose.
- I will lose.
- I really enjoy
working with Lauren.
She's just good vibes.
It's become like
a brother/sister bond.
- I always sat next to a guy
in class
who used to pick his scabs
and eat it.
And he would take it all off
so it's like one big corn flake
and just, like...
- She's super open with me,
and I'm super open with her,
and it's just a friendship
that's forming
into something really nice.
This is a zone.
- Yeah.
- It's a bubble.
- Yeah,
and it cannot be popped.
- I don't know what's going on
between Nico and Lauren.
I think for Nico,
Lauren's been friend-zoned.
I'm not sure
Lauren's aware of that.
- Kate, Ben, and Kelley,
I need all three of you
in the crew mess in two.
- Kelley and Ben rogers.
- Copy.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Charter four. We have
Marc Empey and Heidi Homme
on a family retreat.
They each have two daughters
from previous marriages.
Kinda like "The Brady Bunch."
- "Brady Bunch."
- Yeah.
- They look so sweet.
- She's limited
on most seafood.
- That's about as wild
as it's gonna get.
We've got no weirdos.
They want to take advantage
of all the water toys
that are on the yacht.
- Roger that.
- And they would like
an all-white dinner party.
- Love.
- And we have a new
deckhand coming.
- Oh, really?
- Be here in the morning.
Kyle Adam Dixon.
- That's a very artistic
profile pic.
- Oh, wow.
- Staring off into a horizon.
- And what is that
in his right hand?
- It's an apple.
- A happy napple.
It's an apple.
- He is a little green.
- I can work with green.
- He does have some
white boat experience.
Not a lot, but the labor pool
when you don't have
a lot of time to waste
gets smaller and smaller.
- Either he's got
the best sense of humor ever,
or he's weird.
- Let's go to work.
- Nico, Lauren, you wanna come
down to my cabin for just a sec?
- Copy.
- Uh, so yeah, we will be
getting our new deckhand.
He's former British Army.
He's pretty green.
- Is he?
- Yeah.
- If he accepts that he's green,
then it'll be fine,
but if he's green with attitude,
then we're gonna have a problem.
- Well, he's either gonna be
a nob or he's not.
- Yeah.
- We'll see.
- What's going on?
- I know something's wrong.
I know her so well.
- What's she doing?
- She just sent me a voice mail,
freaked out.
- What?
- 'Cause she, like, was like,
"Oh, okay, bye.
Love ya."
And she was like, "F---.
Like, I said love."
There's a difference
between "love ya"
and "I love you."
- Yeah, yeah.
- Huge.
- I'm thrilled to bits
that Kate's happy with Ro.
I think being in love
takes a certain maturity.
And I'm not sure that
I've ever really been there.
It's when they look
into your eyes
and say, "I love you."
That's when you know
you're truly buggered.
- That's when you know it's
about to go downhill real fast.
- Real quick.
- Like that.
We'd like four 50/50
each cup, okay?
- But we don't want to put
anyone with 49 and, you know,
"Oh, f---."
The number one rule
of yachting
is just don't screw
the crew.
When you start getting feelings
for someone,
it's like, "Ugh, sh--."
It's confusing.
- That PK's gone
right to the dome, isn't it?
Yeah.
- I'd wear something
long-sleeve
'cause it's gonna be cold
on the way back.
- Wow, look at you
all dolled up.
- Look at you.
- Huh, you look nice.
- You look very nice.
- We're gonna have
such a good night tonight.
- About to go and get...
- The girls are all
in black tonight.
- Ciao.
- Oh, we're going to sit here.
Yeah.
- Where are you going?
And it looks like--
Yeah.
- Currently my relationship
status is, uh, undefined.
Before I left, I was talking
to someone back home,
but they don't call me Freako
for nothing.
There's a reason.
- I honestly can't figure out
what's going on
with Nico and Lauren.
Like, are they friends?
Are they more than friends?
Should they be
more than friends?
I think it's kind of hard
for them to even decide.
- We're here.
- Ooh.
- Off the boat.
- Thank you.
- Off the boat.
- Thank you.
- Go for it.
- Lauren.
- I'm gonna help you
anyways.
- Oh, f---.
- Good evening,
welcome to The Rock Cafe.
- Ooh, lobster tank.
- Just look at those spines.
- So pretty.
- Ooh, it is nice here,
isn't it?
- I'll take a gin and tonic.
- That sounds really good,
actually.
- Can I have a vodka,
fresh lime, and soda water?
- What kind of apps
are we into, guys? Anything?
- Bruschetta.
- Okay.
- Easy to share.
- Em, you want to split one?
- Yeah.
- Let's get it on.
- I'm actually good
for drink, thank you.
- You're not getting
a drink?
- What?
- I'm putting you in charge.
If she comes,
that with fettuccine.
- Sure.
- Well...
Sit down here.
Have a laugh.
It's actually really nice
in here.
- Nico's coming in hot,
and I respect that.
But this is like
the tortoise and the hare.
I'm the tortoise.
I'm gonna play the long game.
- Hey, baby.
Oh, cheeky.
- That looks beautiful.
- I'll share, guys.
- Thank you.
Amazing.
- Yeah.
Amazing.
- How's your food?
- Really impressive.
- What'd you get?
- You got the calamari again.
Clever.
- Yeah.
- What the f---?
I don't know what's
going on with Lauren.
- Yeah.
- I'll lead the way, boys.
Let's make bad decisions.
- No, come with me.
- No, really.
- Don't sulk.
- What do you think?
I say something,
and she just ignores me.
- I know something's wrong.
I know her energy.
I know her so well.
- Well, she likes you, man.
So just--just trust me
on this, um...
- Ugh, Lauren,
Lauren, Lauren.
I feel so bad for her that
I don't have those feelings,
and the last thing
I want to do is hurt her.
- This type of emotion will just
blow over, and she'll get it.
- I would never want
to hurt her.
- All right, big guy.
- Come on, let's go.
- We're gonna make sure
you have fun.
Let's just get
in a better place--
- I'm not gonna have
fun tonight.
- Yeah, you are.
Look at me.
- What do you mean
if they're having fun?
- You know what
I'm talking about.
- Who? Him and Emily?
- Lis--I don't want
to talk about it.
- No, no, no, no.
- CocoMaya,
Asian Latino fusion.
- Nico and I are still
getting to know each other,
but he's a very interesting
character,
and he's quite attractive.
- Nico! Nico!
- I feel, like, embarrassed
within myself
that I thought we were
on the same page,
and then now he's flirting
with Emily,
and I just had no idea
that was even
anything on his mind.
It just--
it's painful to watch, really.
Like...
Okay.
- Dude.
- F---.
- Oops.
I disapprove of anyone
making moves on people
when they have
other connections.
I love you all.
- Good evening.
- Yeah.
- All right, off.
- Okay, sounds good.
- We need to get off.
- Lauren, you good?
- Good night, guys.
- Good night, hon.
What?
What?
No, Nico, no.
I go in my room,
Nico knocks on my door.
And he's like, "Come here."
And I'm like, "Oh, what? What?"
Like, "What do you have
to tell me?"
He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- I think he's just confused.
- Come in.
Hello.
- This is your other deckhand.
- I was on motor yacht "Milo."
I spent a bit of time
in Monaco
and the south of France.
I've been doing
offshore suppling,
working on fishing trawlers
since then.
- What?
- We're not in Kansas anymore.
- No.
- He just tried to kiss me.
He just tried to...
Are you f---ing kidding me?
- I don't--I'm not that kind of
girl, and you got a girlfriend.
- Oh, really?
- What?
- Kelley told me
you had a girlfriend.
- I'm going to bed.
Good night.
- I think he's just confused.
- All crew, all crew,
anybody in the crew mess
who can help me
with provisions?
- I hate provisions so much.
- I don't want to see Nico
this morning.
I don't want to talk
about it.
I don't want him
to give me that look
that's like, "Hey, you okay?"
It's like I do--
I just want--let's just get up
and just go to work.
- I don't know when
our new deckhand is showing up.
I thought he was gonna
be here at 8:00.
- Hiya.
Do you want to do a cover?
- Sweating out
the toxins.
- You were pretty sauced up.
- Woke up,
still had my clothes on.
Didn't have anyone else
in my bed.
- You almost did.
- Yeah, I tried making out
with everyone.
- There was only Nico up there,
but he was so drunk.
And then we came down
to the crew area,
and he tried to kiss me.
- What?
- He tried to kiss me.
- No.
- Yes, as soon as we got back.
- As soon as you got back?
- Yes.
His name's Freako.
But I know that's not
who he is.
He doesn't--he's not, like,
a bad guy.
He's not trying
to, like, play us all.
He just wanted
to get a little kiss.
- I thought he was getting on
really well with Lauren
on the exterior as well.
- I don't know
what the deal is there.
- I just want to kinda clarify
where we stand,
and I don't want to hurt
her feelings ever, you know.
I care about her a lot.
- Yeah.
- Just not in a sexual way,
you know.
- You gotta be real careful
with that.
When Lauren and Nico
work together,
they're like best friends.
And for a girl to act that way
around a guy,
no matter how cool she says
she is and how she's a bro,
she's not.
Like, girls catch feelings.
As long as it doesn't
affect work,
I'm gonna let y'all handle it.
- Yeah, yeah, no.
I mean, there's no need for it
to affect our work,
and it's not going to.
- Like, what was he thinking?
- Freako Nico.
- How's it going?
- Great.
- Isn't it great?
- I know.
- I couldn't wait to get out
of bed today, it's so great.
- I jumped out like this,
"Hello, good morning."
Sarcastic.
- Hi, pal, how you doing?
- Good, how are you?
- Kyle.
- Kelley.
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
- Is the Captain about?
- Yeah, you're the new deckhand,
I'm guessing.
- Yeah, I believe so, yeah.
- All right.
Come on, follow me.
- Captain.
- How are you?
- I'm all right, how are you?
- I'm good. Welcome aboard.
My view on beards,
obviously I have one.
I like 'em short and trimmed
and well-groomed.
- Yeah.
- So you haven't done much
white boat work, huh?
For a while.
- Mm-hmm.
- I spent a bit of time in
Monaco and the south of France.
- What?
That's a crazy British accent,
ya wanker.
- We're starting out right away
with a charter on board
in about three hours.
So if you want to take him down,
get him settled in,
and then put him to work.
- All right, will do, Captain.
- Cheers.
We're not in Kansas anymore.
- No.
So working on a trawler,
it's a very dangerous job.
So for me, getting
into yachting is better
because, number one,
there's women on the boat.
And, number two,
it's not deadly.
So it kinda sums it up for me
that it's a better option.
- This will be your cabin.
Nico's your roommate.
He'll be on top.
- Yeah.
- We'll change over
and then put you to work.
- I'm happy with that. Awesome.
- All right, cool.
Sierra, can I get his uniforms?
- You want the whole bag?
- Yep. Thank you.
- Yeah?
- Ah, it's Kelley.
Here you go, bud.
- Awesome.
Cheers, pal.
- Did you meet
the new deckhand, Captain?
- Mm-hmm.
- And?
- Way too early.
- Here's your radio.
- Sweet.
- Hi, you guys all right?
- Hi.
- Kyle, nice to meet you.
- Apple?
I got it for you.
- I'll take it.
- What's the deal
with the CV photo?
I want to know now.
- I'll explain it, so...
I had a photo of me just posing
on a yacht with an apple,
and I--I liked that one.
I'll give it a go.
And here I am,
so maybe the apple worked.
- Hey, yeah.
- I love it.
- I can barely understand
one word he says,
and I'm from England.
- I'm gonna crack on.
- All right, man. Yeah.
- Awesome. Cheers, pal.
- Stop by anytime, bro.
- So this is
your other deckhand.
- Hi.
- Hi, you all right?
- Lauren.
- Yeah, Lauren.
Nice to meet you. Hi, Kyle.
- Kyle. Absolute pleasure.
- Where's Nico?
- I have no idea.
- Hey, Em.
- Hello.
- Um...I wanted to apologize
for my actions last night.
I was--I think I drank
a little bit too much.
It was a little bit
inappropriate.
- I don't think it's
very fair that you
try and make out with Sierra
and myself.
- Yeah.
- None of us should be made
to feel like you were just
trying to get
with the easiest girl.
- Yeah.
I'm really sorry about that.
I kind of got caught up
in the fun,
and Freako gets me in trouble
sometimes.
- How's your head feeling
this morning?
Yeah.
It's getting a beating.
- Has the boat lost a bit
of respect for Nico,
out of interest?
- Yeah, kind of.
- Really?
- Yeah, 'cause he tried making
out with every stewardess.
But you'll give him
extra respect for that,
so I understand
why you're confused.
- Yeah, I know.
- Hey, man, how's it going?
- How you doing? You all right?
- Yeah, Nico.
- Kyle. Absolute pleasure.
- Kyle.
Nice to meet you as well.
- Well, go ahead
and get with Nico.
It's just a little tidy-up right
now before the guests get here.
- All right.
Okay.
- So where are you from?
- Manchester.
- Oh, nice.
- I live in London.
- Oh, my daughter
lives in London.
- Your?
- Daughter.
I met ex missus
quite rapidly on a pub crawl,
and we had a child
unexpectedly.
- Are you jet-lagged at all?
- I'm all right.
I FaceTimed my daughter
when I landed.
I got to watch her eat raisins
for ten minutes today.
That was--that was nice.
So what do you want me
to do right now?
- Maybe just, like, go over the
stainless just with a chamois,
make sure there's no,
like, water spots.
- Okay, and the chamois
are in that locker?
- Um, yeah.
Check it out. Go through it.
Check out the materials
that we got,
and if you
have any questions--
- Port side or starboard?
- Starboard side, aft.
- Right.
- It's just kind of weird
right now with Lauren.
Just--we just
need to fix this.
- These guys are not gluten free
or lactose intolerant.
- No matter what, they're gonna
be better than the last group.
- You gonna be ready
five, ten minutes?
- Yeah.
- I just want you to go
in the laz with Nico
to open up all the hatches,
find every tool we've got,
and make me a list.
- Yep.
Nico, what a f---ing idiot.
- She told him off
for trying to kiss her
after he tried to kiss me.
- What the f---?
Not cool. Not cool.
- I just hope everything's
all right with us.
- I guess I want to know what
the f--- you were thinking.
- She told him off
for trying to kiss her
after he tried to kiss me.
- What the f---?
Boy, you did not make
any smart moves.
I know Nico
was wasted last night,
but I can't believe he tried
to kiss Emily and Sierra.
He's just not the guy
that I thought he was.
- Lauren.
- Yeah.
- Game time.
- All right.
- So what's up, chica?
- Hey.
- How you feeling today?
- Fine. You know.
- Yeah, you know, I just hope
everything's all right with us.
You seemed really stressed out,
like, you know, I--
- Yeah, I guess I wanna know
what the f---
you were thinking?
- Just, you know,
f---ing alcohol, man.
You know, I got super drunk.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, we all were
pretty drunk,
but when we sat at the table,
you weren't really,
like, talking to me at all,
so I just felt like maybe
I did something to upset you.
You know, I don't want
anything to change.
We work really well.
You know what I'm trying to say?
- I know, yeah.
- You know?
- It's a bit
of a smack in the face
to know that you've
just been "friend zoned,"
but I'm good at just
putting it aside
and just hoping that
the feelings will just
trickle away with time.
We know where we stand.
We know how f---ing good
we are together.
- I'm glad that we're okay.
- We're good.
You can't get through us.
We're good and we're sweet.
- We're cool.
- I'm sorry.
What was your name again?
- Kyle.
- Kyle?
What you doing?
- Ironing.
- I don't mind.
It's just 'cause, uh, I thought
you guys were a bit busy,
so I just thought I'd do it
'cause I've got
some time to burn.
- Okay, well--
- Unless you--
do you wanna do it or--
- No, I'd love
to see your skills, though,
so I'll let you do
these one pants
and maybe the captain's.
- Oh, I can see this now.
Delegation.
- Maybe.
- To delegate is to inspire.
- That's a high honor
to iron the captain's pants.
- Attention all crew,
we have 30 minutes
until guest arrival.
- I don't think your feet
have seen sunlight
in, like, four years.
That's a good-size boat.
- All right, they're coming on.
- Welcome aboard.
- Thank you.
Got a perfect day.
- Captain Lee.
- Hello.
- Hi there. Welcome.
- Hi. How are you?
Captain Lee.
- I'm good. I'm Claire.
- Megan.
- Hi.
- Kelley.
- Nice to meet you, Kelley.
- Marc, Heidi,
welcome aboard "Valor."
We've got a lot of fun
in store for you.
Kate will show you
to your rooms,
and we'll get out of here
and get this party going.
- All right, whoo!
Ready.
- Right this way.
- Thank you.
- My pleasure.
So this is the main salon.
- Ooh.
- This boat was recently refit,
so all of this is brand-new.
This is our master, and
the bathroom is quite large.
- I'll just load 'em
up here with you?
- Yeah.
- There's a bathtub,
a huge shower.
- You don't get that everywhere.
- And then we're gonna go
to sun deck.
- Oh, wow.
- So we've got a Jacuzzi.
And then we call this
the bunny pad.
It's great for laying out
while we're under way.
- Gorgeous.
- Okay, let's go.
Bow to stern starting now.
Let's go ahead
and get the bowlines off.
- The spring line,
you're gonna drop.
The breast line,
you're gonna bring up.
- That goes to the mom.
This goes to the dad.
- So it's like drop
spring first
and just pull that
one in, yeah?
- Go ahead and uncoil it off.
- I got one line standing here.
Let's get it off.
- Okay, Cap.
All lines clear astern.
- All right,
we're coming out of here.
- This is awesome.
- Yeah, it's ridiculous.
- Kyle was sent from heaven.
- We're all meshing very well;
we're doing our job well.
It's awesome.
- Can I get anybody a refill
or something to drink
besides champagne?
- A Captain and Sprite
for me, please.
- How hungry are y'all?
You want to do lunch
around 2:00?
- Can I get another mojito,
please?
- Mojito, yeah, of course.
- Thank you.
- As long as they have
cocktails, they can do--
They don't care.
- My kind of people.
- I think this primary
has accepted his fate
that he's gonna be surrounded
by drunk women all the time,
and he handles it with grace.
Ben.
- Yes.
- I asked them if they would
like lunch around 2:00.
Is that good for you?
- Okay. So they're not like,
"Oh, we're really hungry" or--
- No, they're like,
"Hey, who needs food
when you've got drinks?"
- She wants to try mojitos,
but she hates mojitos.
- It tastes like salad
in your drink, bro.
- No, it doesn't.
- Why do I want to eat my drink?
- No, thank you.
- Hi, Kyle. I'm Sierra.
I know we met earlier.
- Been very busy, so I haven't
bothered you all day.
- Yeah, I felt like
I was dying earlier,
and then I got really busy.
Busy's good, though; I feel
like it makes the time go by
and, like, the way these
charters are set up,
like, it just flies.
- So where's all,
like, the treats?
Where's the fat food?
- The fat food?
Oh, you can, like, face me.
Face me and then, like, under
that cabinet, like, under--
- We just met, Sierra; you're
making me bend over already.
- No, no, you can just,
like, lean.
- Sierra's looking nice.
She's just exactly what I need.
She's very, like, cold weather,
like, Norwegian.
And I'm a Viking.
So she can come sailing with me
anytime.
- If you and Claire got in
a fight, like a fistfight--
- Like a fistfight? I feel like
we're both scrappy as f---.
- So, Ben, what are you
making for lunch?
- Asparagus salad
with roast beet,
goat cheese,
Mediterranean sea bass,
and I'm gonna go in strong
with a potato salad.
- Yeah.
- Trufflize the hell out of it.
- Oh, boy.
- Give me three shots.
- Roger, three shots.
- Lock it down at three.
You're good.
- Those tie up at the top there
like that?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, perfect.
- Kyle seems really cool.
- So nice.
Very nice.
- Somebody needs to get
lucky on this boat.
- There's a lot of sexual
tension on the boat.
Emily should just take
her pick.
Someone. Whatever.
All of them.
I don't care.
- Whoo!
- You all right, Kyle?
- Is he all right?
What happened?
- You all right?
- F---ing hell.
- Oh, my God.
- Holy sh--.
- F---.
- Hey, Kyle, go throw on your
swim shorts and rash guard.
- So just to let you know,
Ben's starting
to platter up lunch,
and I've got the table set
downstairs
whenever you guys are ready.
- Okay, terrific.
Downstairs for lunch.
- Get started
on getting the toys in.
- We're already on it,
Captain.
- Thank you, sir.
- No, we gotta go out this way,
right?
- That's the way.
- There it is.
- Got you.
This is the first time
I've ever been
to the Caribbean,
and I'm so excited to be here.
I'm in the BVIs, man.
You know?
And I'm getting somewhere
in my life.
It's great.
- Would you like
some potato salad?
- Yes, I would.
Great.
- Goat cheese, kiwi,
roasted beets.
- Ooh, beets. I see beets.
- Goat cheese.
- Ben gets an A on this one.
- Kids are messed up.
- Who raised us?
- Not me.
- It's actually
kind of surprising to me
that these parents
are encouraging and allowing
their daughters
to drink so much.
- Kit Kats and Coors Light.
Killing it.
- I want them
to remember their vacation,
so maybe it's time
we start serving them
a little bit lighter drinks.
- You like it.
You like it.
- Look at that.
Whoo!
- So one of those in each bag
and then we'll give you these
lighter ones afterwards.
- All right.
- F---.
- You all right, Kyle?
- Is he all right?
What happened?
- You all right?
- F---. F---ing hell.
- Oh, my God.
- Holy sh--.
Did he dislocate his shoulder?
- Next on "Below Deck"...
- Oh, Ro's coming to visit.
- Who the f--- is that?
What?
- Oh, my God, Ben is, like,
hating his life right now.
- Come on.
- I need to cool off.
- Whoa!
- I like my girls tiny,
like, "Oh,
I'm gonna protect you."
- What are you doing?
Kelley.
- You do realize, though,
that I find you very attractive?
You're stunning,
absolutely beautiful.
Kelley, Kelley, Lee.
I've been looking
at dirty f---ing windows
for three f---ing days.
- That's all inside.
- Do you really want
to go to war on this?
I want it done.
- They're properly
sauced up now, right?
- They're drinking at a rate
that even impresses
and scares me.
- Oh!
- Whoo!
- You guys are over the reef.
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