Being Human (2008–2013): Season 4, Episode 2 - Being Human 1955 - full transcript

Following a supernatural radio announcement Leo, Pearl and Hal arrive at Annie and Tom's to pay homage to George and Nina's baby daughter Eve, the Chosen One, who will save the world. Knowing that this means the extermination of vampires, Hal is less pleased to see her than the others but remains the only one of the three to survive when Pearl and Leo, having declared their love for each other, pass over. Hal appears to come close to killing the baby but is prevented by Tom. However, following a visit to a pawn shop by the two boys in keeping with Leo's last wish, Fergus, the successor to Griffin, gets on their trail.

The rest of the Old Ones
arrive in two months.

We create a new context
and we show them something worse.

I knew you'd come to save her.
She's the War Child.

GROWLS

You'll have to look after her now.

She needs a name, George.

She's called Eve.

I'm going to save the world.

We need a miracle.

I'm going to kill that baby.

La Vie En Rose



Oh! Your friend's back.

I beg your pardon?

Yeah, I just saw him.

Where?

I love this song.

Upstairs. Oh!

It's good to sit down.

And you just left him there?

I met him once, you know.

Satchmo.

Stage door.

The New Opera House, 1950.

Why didn't you kill him?

At least, I think it was him.



I was so drunk,
it could have been Shirley Bassey.

I won't do your dirty work for you.

I can't do it.

You know I can't.

Leo, do you hear this?

You can't do that, Pearl.
We need to get rid of him.

He's filthy and he hates me.

He doesn't hate you, Hal!

Pearl, could you...?

Why should I have blood on my
hands?!

There doesn't have to be blood
on anyone's hands!

He's a spider.

Just catch him in a cup
and put him outside.

Fine! You're helping!

RADIO STATIC

'Leo?

'Leo, can you hear me?

'Don't be afraid.

'I bring news of great joy.

'You must journey west.

'There, you will find a house
wherein dwells a man like you

'and a woman like Pearl.

'They are the guardians to a child.

'That child is the Chosen One.

'She will save you, Leo.

'She will save us all. '

Dog Scratched Ear

Where have you been?

Out! Stop doing that.

"Aht" where?

Just out.

Right, let's get this over with.

Annie!

Please assume the position.

I ain't done nowt!

You haven't done anything!

Exactly.

No, Tom, I'm not agreeing with you.
Your grammar is appalling.

Right, you're clean. See?

What do you expect
when you sneak in here all...

.. sneakily, hm?

No, I agreed to let you live
under my roof under one condition -

that you abide by all of my
commandments.

You talking about the house rules,
Annie? Yes, I am, Tom,

and why don't we just
run through them again
so that we're clear?

No smoking, no dialling 0800
numbers, all dishes must be washed,

dried and put away,
not left to drip,

no bringing girls home,

never put a cup down
without a coaster,

and if I'm going to be late,
two rings.

A- A-And we're missing one,
aren't we?

No killing vampires.

So sorry?

No killing vampires, but I was
thinking, if I'm out on the street

and I see a vampire, are you
saying that I can't kill him?

Yes, Tom. Yes, that is exactly
what I'm saying.

OK, what if he attacks me?

Then, yes, you can, yes.

Right, well,
make a note of that, then.

I'm just going to make
a note... of that.

Good.

Why don't the three of us
go away somewhere?

The Old Ones are coming, I don't
understand why we're still here.

What? No, it wouldn't make any
difference.

We could go to Timbuk-bloody-tu
and the mayor would be a vampire.

No, we've tried running
and it doesn't work.

If the Old Ones want to find you,
they will.

No, a better idea is to stay put,
don't draw attention to ourselves

and just stay out of trouble.

You know I am responsible

for the Saviour of the world,
after all.

Don't do that face, Tom.

You know my feelings about that
face. Annie, she's not the Saviour.

I love that little girl to pieces,
I really do, but this is insane.

She's just a baby.

She's not going to walk on water,
she's not going to feed the 5,000

and she's not going to be visited

by the three wise men
following a star.

I'm The Wolf

Not much further.
Seven, Hal.

There were all on the left-hand
side of the road.

I never stop on the left-hand side,
you know that.

Seven petrol stations!
It's unlucky.

Listen, Rain Man...

Everything OK?

Everything's good.
Great!

Everything's just... great.

Couldn't you have
talked him out of this?

He was adamant.

Oh, it's madness!

Do you really think we're going
to knock on this door

and find a ghost and a werewolf
shacked up together?

Like that would ever happen.

Shacked up together,
baby-sitting the Messiah.

You're right, it is madness,
but he's not well, Pearl.

He doesn't ask much of us.

I know he's not well.

I'm perfectly aware of that,
thank you.

I'm sorry.

It's times like this
I'm glad I'm invisible,

because when some unsuspecting
man or woman answers that door,

you're going to have to tell them
we're here to visit a godchild.

Good luck with that.

I'll explain that
we are humouring our friend.

I'll say that he's old and...

And what? Losing his mind?
Is that how he's going to leave us?

He's not going to leave us.

I think we're here.

Great.

Tom.

Who's that?

Oh, please don't! We mean no harm,
young man, I promise you.

It's all right, Leo.

Remove your weapon.

I know what you are, but who are you
and who sent you here?

Thomas, what are you doing?!
And where did you get that?

I'm going to count to ten.

I suggest you use that time
wisely and step away.

You don't scare me...

One...

two... Did you hide that
in my hanging basket?

.. three...
That is it, I'm going to have to add

another commandment... four...

Thou shall not hide stakes
in my shrubbery.

.. five... Is she serious?

.. six... Who sent you?

We were told to come here.

By who?

Can you see me?
Can you see me?

I'm a ghost. So am I.

.. eight...

An angel who was sent here
by an angel.

.. nine...
Hold on. You're a ghost?

Is he a werewolf?

A very naughty werewolf.

She sent us to see...

BABY CRYING
.. the Saviour.

Well. Well, well, well, well, well.

Did you hear that, Tom?

They've been sent to see the Saviour,
by an angel no less.

Well, isn't that just brilliant

Fantastic.

Hmm.

Here we go.

Now, are you sure there isn't
anything else I can get you, Leo?

I'm fine, honestly.

OK.

Would... would you
like to... sort of...

No? OK. OK.

Sit down, Hal, you're making them
nervous.

Yeah, Hal, sit down.

Thank you, I'll stand.

Great. Lovely.

So, um, how do you
all know each other?

We live together.

You what?

I know it's a bit unusual.

No, it's not that.
It's just that, um... Well...

Three supernaturals
all under the same roof.

Yes, exactly, and I...

I mean, a werewolf and a vampire
becoming friends.

It's unheard of, I suppose.

No, actually,
not that unheard of because...

I think it's largely my influence.

Interestingly enough, I...

Some might say I've achieved
the impossible.

I did it!

I'm sorry. Um, I did it.

I did it too. It's not anything
to shout about really, is it?

But I did do it.

What, there's a vampire here?

Er... no, not exactly.

Um... things have changed
a lot for us recently.

Oh, that's a pity.

Over 55 years and I've never
had to change my line-up.

Good.

Annie...

I understand that you are
the Saviour's guardian.

Well, yes.

I appreciate how
demanding that must be.

And, so, one minute in
her presence is all I ask.

And I shall make it so.

Thomas...

bring forth the Chosen One.

Go.

Go and get the baby, Tom.

Um, now, Leo,

when exactly did this
angel speak to you?

Over Louis Armstrong, on the radio.

And, um... And what did she
sound like, this... this angel?

- Where did you get this?
- Um, well, a man.

Well, a, no... A vampire.

He gave it me. He said
it comes with Eve.

You do know that it's human skin?

No. No, that one's not, actually.
No, that one's fake.

It's just prosthetics.

Would it make it easier
for you to believe that?

Yes.

- Then that's what it is.
- Thank you.

Oh, and... this is she.

She's so tiny! How can something
so powerful be so tiny?

I'm not a young man any more.

I'm ill and I'm useless.

But I need more time.
This can't happen yet.

I've...

It's OK.

Don't say anything, Leo,
just breathe.

Just concentrate on breathing.

What's happening?

Will you help me?

Annie?
It's Eve! Isn't it?

It's Eve. Don't you get it?
Eve's saying yes.

Leo, Eve is saying yes.

She will help you.

Gotta stop this
before it goes any further.

Look,

I know that you don't think Eve
is gifted, so just leave it, OK?

I'm not saying that. I don't know
what she'll do when she grows up.

She might be an amazing pianist
or a maths genius,

or a barrister.

She might own her own restaurant

or become
President of the United States.

Highly unlikely!

She's a British citizen.

Oh, that's unlikely,
but it's all right for an angel

to interrupt Louis Armstrong
to bring them lot here?

That's fine, innit?!

We cannot begin to understand
the forces at work here.

If this was just us, if this was all
something to help you cope

with everything that's happened,
then fine.

But you're dragging other people
into it and it ain't right.

Eve can't save that man.

After everything
that you've been through,

why is this so difficult
for you to believe?

What's all this really about, Annie?

Pfff...

I am not going to argue
about this with you, Tom.

I'm on your side.

Then, please,
just support me in this.

Hmm?

Unbelievable.

That angel was right.

But, then again, I sensed it,
when we were approaching the house.

Oh, so, she's an angel now?

This morning, she was
a hallucination!

I don't think I actually used
the word "hallucination".

You did.

I think we should
just forget about all that.

The important thing is,
she's going to make you better.

Well, Hal, it seems Pearl's
been converted.

What about you?

What is that thing anyway?

To us...

.. this is holy scripture,

the only thing we really believe in.

I didn't even know
it physically existed.

Yet here it is, in the same
house as that child.

It's not just a coincidence.

What are you talking about?

I think that Eve
really is the War Child.

She's actually going to do it.
She's going to rid the world of us.

Us? Vampires.

Is that what that thing says?

The child of the moon, the Godhead,
death of the vampires.

It won't happen today or tomorrow,

it could be years from now,
but it will happen.

Oh, I'm so sorry, Hal.

If I'd known,
I wouldn't have brought you here.

No, I think I was meant to come.

I think I was meant to find her.

Hey. Well, um...

We have some very, very exciting news
for you, don't we, Tom?

Yeah, s'pose.

Right, we're gonna do this thing
to channel Eve's energy,

because she's God and that. Um...

And, hopefully, that might help you
not die, or whatever.

There's subtitles for this
conversation?

OK, so, basically,
what Tom is saying is...

we are going to have a ceremony!

GEORGE SHRIEKING

SHRIEKING AND SCREAMING CONTINUES

HOWLING

All right, then.

Now, as you'll see on the sheets
in front of you,

I need you to answer
three simple questions.

Firstly, I want you to tell me
what you think you just saw.

Second, whether such a thing can
even be possible and third,

if creatures like this did exist,
how would that make you feel?

Frightened? Excited?

Curious?

Threatened?

Horny? Seriously,
you'd be surprised.

And then, I want...
What the shit's this?

Excuse me.

Fergus! Come on!

Who are they? My focus group.

Oh, that's all right, then.

Here's me worried
you might've been dicking about.

Look, Griffin's dead.
Everything's falling apart.

All the others have gone back
to their Clark Kents.

We seriously need to sort our shit
out before the Old Ones arrive.

And is that what you've been doing,
is it? Sorting our shit out?

Yes. I set up a war council,
actually.

Are they your war council?
Interesting.

Yeah? What about you?

Giving it all Peter Mendelssohn.

OK, Fergus, either you mean
Peter Mandelson

or you're comparing me
to a German composer.

See, this, this is exactly
what I'm talking about.

What we need now is fists and fangs.

I'll tell you something...

Those guys, they're dedicated...
SCREAMING

.. they're disciplined...
They're eating my focus group.

SCREAMING

Yeah, we skipped lunch.

Right, that's it.
Now, just piss off!

Who do you think you're talking to?

An irrelevance?

The perennial henchman?

I mean, you seriously think the
Old Ones

are gonna appoint you
as Griffin's successor?

Better me than you.
They don't even know who you are.

Ah, not yet, maybe,
but I've got something to show them

a whole lot better
than your shit-eating grin.

Uh?

Huh, we'll see about that.

Come on, you guys.

Pricks.

I can't even read it.

CLATTER

Welcome to you all.

Do not be afraid. Come closer
and gather round the prophet.

Don't be afraid.

I would like to ask you now
all to hold hands.

Go ahead.

All powerful and merciful Eve,

we have come here today to ask you
to assist our dear friend, Leo.

We humbly beseech thee
to restore him to health,

drive away all illness and infirmary,

strengthen him,

raise him up so that he may...

Um...

Ahem.

Raise him up so that he may...
stand on mountains.

Raise him up so that he may walk
on stormy seas.

Let the road... rise to meet him.

Let the force... be with him.

Carpe diem.

Veni vidi vici.

Et tu, Brute, Dolce et Gabbana est.

For thine is the power,
the kingdom and the glory,

for ever and ever, amen.

Oh, my God! Christ!

ELECTRICAL BUZZING
Oh, my gosh, what's happening?!

He can't breathe,
that's what's happening.

Get my bag. Leo!

Leo? What the hell did you do?

Don't you talk to
her like that, mate!

You've no idea what you're doing,
do you?

I'm warning ya!
You said she would 'elp him!

So why doesn't she?

Never mind switching
the bloody lights on and off,

why doesn't she cure him?

Cos she's just a baby,
an innocent baby.

Why are you trying to make her out
to be something she ain't?

She's George and Nina's baby.
Why ain't that enough?

Come on, little 'un.

SIGHS

I don't want to hear this,
Leo, please.

Please, let me finish.

I've been a fool, Pearl.

I'm going to die. I know that now.

And I'm not afraid.
I swear, I'm not.

The only thing I'm afraid of
is what would happen

to you and Hal when I'm gone.

That's why I wanted to be cured.

I needed more time to,
I don't know, prepare you both.

To teach you how to cope without me.

It will be so different
when you only have each other.

I don't want to think about that.

That's my point.
You have to.

Wow!

I used to love that game
when I was younger.

Oh, knocking them over
is the best feeling in the world.

I never do that. What?!

I build them up, piece by piece,

and when I'm finished,
I take them down again,

piece by piece.

Well, you are missing out a very
important part of that game, then.

Leo gave me these. Every day,
he'd make me line them up,

but never let me knock them down.

Why?

He wanted to show me
that I'm in control.

If I could teach myself
to fight small urges...

.. then I could train myself
to resist much bigger ones.

So... So you used to do all of that,
every single day?

I still do.

It's part of my routine now, Annie.

I like routine.

It keeps me...

It keeps my mind occupied
and stops me from thinking too much.

Being responsible for the Saviour of
the world must dominate your time?

Oh... yes.

Yes, I s'pose so.

DOOR OPENS

Where's his inhaler?

What?

Leo's inhaler. I told you to pack it.

- It's in my bag.
- Oh, I'll do it.

No, let me. I know where it is!

There's a system. Pearl, there's a
system!

Bugger the bloody system.

Um... Um, listen,

listen, Pearl. I'm really sorry
that the, um, the ceremony didn't
work.

Yeah, right.

Um, but it's just... I've been
thinking.

Sometimes, when you get a message
from the other side, it needs to be
interpreted.

So, maybe, Leo didn't come here
to get cured.

Here we go. It's not the baby's
fault, God forbid.

Um, no, maybe he was supposed to
bring you two here,

so that, you know, when he does
finally... go,

that he'll know you'll both be all
right.

What are you saying?

OK, um...

What I'm saying is... move in here!

Are you somehow drunk?

No. Um, no.

I just don't see the point
in having this big house

with all these rooms
if I can't help people.

And, besides, it'll be really good
for me to... um, I mean, for you two,

both of you, to have something new
to focus on.

That's the worst idea I've ever
heard.

Be quiet, Hal.

You're not actually considering this,
are you?

Well, look, I mean, you can't really
go back to Southend without Leo.

It would just be so... empty and...

quiet and...

different.

I'm going to the shop.
Do you want to come?

I'd love to, but I've made plans
to sit in and self-harm, so...

- You're a dickhead.
- If you say so.

Have we finished flirting?

Because I'd like to go inside now.

Wait a sec. Do you know what this is?

It's a ring, Tom.

As in jewellery.

Jewellery is the term given to
personal dress ornaments, such as
rings,

- watches, bracelets.
- I know what it is, Hal.

Why does Leo want it?

- What?
- Leo calls me into his room,

stuffs this into me hand
and says he wants it, or one like it.

What else did he say?

"Take Hal with you. "

Then Pearl came in
and he hid under the covers.

Why didn't he simply ask me?
You barely know him.

Well, it involves going to the shop,
Hal,

and you're not exactly a people
person, are you?

You don't think this is intended
to help us bond, do you?

Some random quest
he imagines will bring us together?

Nah. Look at the state of that
picture.

How many years
has he been carrying it around wi'
'im?

It must mean something to him.

Right, well, we shall retrieve this
ring, if that's what he wants.

Yeah, but we won't start liking
each other, because you're a
dickhead.

And you are a Neanderthal.

Exactly. Now, are you coming to the
shop, or what?

So, I was thinking I would put Hal
in the double bedroom,

or the bridal suite,
as we like to call it.

It's quite a big room,
but he seems like a man who,

you know, needs his own space.

Um, and then we will put you
in the second guest bedroom,

which is right next to Leo's and it's
quite, um... It's cosy, if that's OK?

- I haven't even see it.
- Great, lovely!

Settled, perfect, brilliant!

Well, I'll just let you make yourself
at home,

and feel free to fix it up
however you would like,

provided you do check it with me
first,

so you don't do anything too crazy
or over the top. That'd be great.

Yes, because your home is the epitome
of understated elegance, isn't it,
Annie?!

Thank you.

I was being sarcastic.

Look.

I want to make one thing clear.

The only reason I'm even considering
this is because Leo thinks it's a
good idea.

OK.

Thank you, Annie,
for welcoming me into your home

That's OK,
don't worry about it, it's fine.

If we do decide to stay, there's
gonna have to be a few changes.

That'll have to go, for a start.

That?

Well, no, that...
that is not going anywhere.

It's an eyesore.

It's retro.

- What?!
- You know, like, cool.

In an ironic kind of way.

I thought you'd have an appreciation
for that, considering how you're
dressed.

Ohh!

Is this the lady in the longjohns
attacking my dress sense?

I'm not attacking...
Sorry, I beg your pardon?

The carpets need a good clean.

These are not longjohns, they're
leggings.

And a bar in the living room?
What message does that send out?

And, actually, I died in 2007 and I
do still see people wearing them
today, so...

You know, actually, I was quite
fashion forward with
these... leggings.

We'll need to start using
a new brand of tea.

That stuff you make always looks
very anaemic.

There is nothing wrong with my tea.

Hal has been dry for 55 years, and
we've had hardly any problems with
him.

So, I thought,
since he's going to be living here,

I'd jot down one or two things
to help him stay that way.

It might seem silly,

keeping a list of instructions
for a grown man.

Not so silly.

So, first off, try to keep him
away from people.

What kind of people?

Oh, general people.

- And dogs. Mainly the small ones.
- And budgies.

That only happened the once, and he
sent a letter of apology to the
miniature circus.

It's best to err on the side of
caution, I think.

This is a given,
but blood is a definite no-go.

Sure.

Absolutely, yep.

So, um, that's people, small dogs,
budgies and blood.

This is an important one, Annie.

Never, under any circumstances,
ever allow him to drink

Kia-Ora.

Kia-Ora - the squash?

You should steer clear of all
diluted drinks and cordials, really.

But Kia-Ora -
that's the one to look out for.

Why? What happens when he drinks
Kia-Ora?

- We don't talk about it, Annie.
- Oh.

Well, do they even still make
Kia-Ora?

Oh, they're making it all right!

- They're making it.
- It's OK, Pearl!

It's all right.

Wow.

- I think that covers it.
- Good. Lovely.

So, um, what about you, Pearl?

Any dark secrets? Anything I should
know?

Pearl... is a woman without fault.

I'll tell you later.

Oh, gosh, I wish Tom would get back.

I think she needs to go out
for some fresh air.

Well, why don't you take her?

Floating baby. Freaks people out!

Just swaddle.

I beg your pardon?

Are you telling me you've never
swaddled?

No, I haven't,
and I don't think I want to!

That sounds like something they do
on Girls Behind Bars. Urgh!

You swaddle!

Call yourself a ghost!

Here we are.

- Why are you so bothered?
- What?

I mean, I know why I'm here,
but why are you going to all this
trouble

- for a sick old man you barely know?
- I happen to quite like him,
actually.

He's sound, even if he has got
seriously bad judgment

- when it comes to picking his mates.
- Huh.

The fact that you are so young
and so narrow-minded is truly
staggering.

Look, some of us do terrible things
occasionally,

- that's true.
- Yeah, occasionally.

Yeah, but so do werewolves.

So do humans, for that matter. I
don't understand why you hate
vampires so much.

Oh, they're arrogant, egotistical,
predatory,

they often have stupid haircuts, and
what was the other one? There was
another one.

Oh, yeah, they killed me dad, Hal.

So nobody can actually see her like
this?

No. They don't see you,
they don't see her.

It's the oldest trick in the book.

Wow, but this is amazing!

She once sneaked me into a Beatles
concert underneath her skirt.

No! Really?!

Yeah. We were right up at the front.

I caught one of Ringo's drumsticks.

As I remember it, you yanked it
out of some poor girl's hand.

He's a stickler for detail.

Oh, it was a good day.

Yeah.

It was.

I didn't want it to end.

I have to, um...

I forgot. There's something I have to
do.

- That's the one, there.
- That's the one.

I bet they do rubber tubing in here.

What?

I'm thinking about building
a swimming pool in the back yard.

Then I could use some for the, er...

- ... for the water jets.
- Fascinating. Please hurry.

Hiya, mate. I'm just enquiring about
the ring that's...

That's not for sale.

Hey!

Don't touch that.

- It's not for sale.
- What's it for?

Decoration.

And it cost me a bloody fortune,
so take your hands off it.

I'll not ask again.

Decoration?

Is he deaf... or thick? Or both?

It's an old hunting trophy, Tom,
that's all.

I know what it is, Hal.

Look, it's probably ancient.

That's supposed to make a difference?

What kind of a person buys
something like this?

Who'd want it?

It's an animal.

A proud, majestic, noble animal.

Listen to David-fucking-Attenborough!

And his head shouldn't be on a stick

in the middle of some filthy
backstreet pawn shop.

Tom, let's just leave.

I'm not in the mood for this.

Just piss off. Go on, out.

- I'm not going till you take it
down. - Or you'll do what, exactly?

Bloody tree-hugging,
Guardian-reading...

soya-milk-drinking, bicycle-riding,
aluminium-collecting fuckwit.

This is my shop.

What I choose to hang from its walls
is my business.

And that is staying put, so clear
off.

- No, it ain't.
- Hey!

- No, you're...
- Get off me!

- Shit.
- Ow!

He's got me in a hind-neck... nelson!

I've never come across it.

Well, gentlemen,
I'm going to have to split this up.

He's completely mental!

- Clean yourself up.
- What?

Do it now!

You people have no self-control.

I wasn't the one punching him.

He punched me first!

Hey!

What do you think you're doing?

What does it look like?

Well, it looks like
you're pointing a firearm at us.

You've picked on the wrong man today.

So it would seem

- You should probably get on with it.
- What?

What?!

Oh, you haven't done this before,
have you?

It's OK.

Just breathe and I'll take you
through it.

- Just shut up!
- Yeah, Hal, shut up!

Right, now, your heart feels like
it's swollen.

And it's beating so fast, you're
worried it might burst right through
your chest.

Your body's weighted, like you've
been welded to the spot you stand in.

Your hands are sweating.

Spasming.

And you don't know
if you're going to be able

to hold onto that thing for much
longer, let alone fire it.

But all of this is perfectly normal,

because, you see, everything in your
body is telling you to fight this.

Killing is the most difficult thing
in the world.

Which is why, when you actually do
it...

...there's nothing more exhilarating.

You played God.

And it makes you feel powerful.

Invincible.

- Don't even think about it!
- That feeling...

doesn't last.

Soon, you realise
that even if you get away with it,

you'll never really... get away with
it.

My conscience will cope.

No. No, you think you'll walk away
from something like this unscathed,

but it's impossible.

It all clings to you.

The mess you made of him,
the scars you placed on him,

the blood you bathed him in,
it sticks to you.

It stains you.

Do this...

...and it won't be the last time you
see his face.

You'll see him first thing in the
morning, last thing at night.

And he'll be with you while you
dream.

You end his life...
and he'll invade yours.

The way I see it, there's only two
ways you could know those things.

Either you're a man of God...

or you're speaking from experience.

I'm not a man of God.

- Do you think he'd have done it?
- Maybe, I don't know.

Well, whatever, thanks.

You're very welcome!

We forgot the ring.

Did we?

Ha!

Great

Are you OK?

Yeah...

- The kettle. Little Eve...
- Is not here.

And, actually, she's usually
somewhere else when this stuff starts
happening.

What are you saying, Annie?

Well, this started when you showed
up.

Yes.

It's related to Leo's illness -
you said so yourself.

And I still believe that to be true.

I just don't think it's Eve causing
it.

I think it's you.

Don't be ridiculous!

It's grief, Pearl.

You know that...

Leo's...

...dying, and...

...you're very upset.

Of course I'm upset.

He's my friend.

You're in love with him, Pearl.

And I know how you feel!

I fell in love with my best friend
and I lost him

and it was... It was awful.

But if I hadn't have told him,

it would've been even more
unbearable.

I would've regretted it
every single second of every single
day.

I am right, aren't I?

Yeah.

It's too late, Annie.

It's 55 years too late.

How can I possibly tell him now?

How could you possibly not?!

You have got to tell him how you
feel, because you...

...you might not get another chance.

For over half a century,
I've been stuck here.

But that didn't matter,
because I was stuck here with him.

He's...

everything to me.

Always has been.

I don't want to be without him,
Annie.

I know.

No, I know you don't.

I know you don't.

I need to talk to you.

Oh, my God.

50 years ago,
you were looking at that picture

and you stared straight into my eyes

and said, "I just wish I'd been
loved.

"I wish someone would give me a ring,
just like this one. "

I should've given this to you then.

But I was too shy.

And too scared.

And too stupid.

But I want you to have it now.

And I want you to know
that you were loved.

I loved you since the moment I met
you.

And I'll die loving you, Pearl.

The thing is, Leo...

I love you too.

God, it's all moving so fast!

It's only been 55 years

I had to tell you.

I couldn't leave without telling you.

No!

Oh, God. Oh, my God!

Get Hal!

Leo.

Don't you do this, don't you dare do
this!

Hal, it's Leo! Get up here!
- I have to go. Let me.

Help! Stop him!

Make him stop.

Leo, please.

This had to happen one day.

There's no point trying to stop it.

We've had the most amazing life
together.

No.

Eve was going to save you!

That's why we came here.

We'll try again in another ceremony.

Hal!

It's all right.

I don't understand.

He's here.

He's ours.

You told him you loved him.

That was your unfinished business.

You're both leaving me.

Hal, I'm sorry.

I wasn't expecting this to happen.

I'll stay.

- I can stay!
- No, Pearl...

you might not get another chance.
That's your door.

I'll be fine.

We can't leave him on his own!

I won't be on my own. I'll be here.

Promise me you'll look after him,
Annie.

Go.

- Are you sure?
- Go.

Both of you, please, just go!

You were the best friend I ever had.

You too.

Leo, I'll never forget you.

So, how do you like your new room?

You don't actually have to go through
with this, you know.

Oh, no, Hal, you are staying with us.

I made a promise, and if there's
anything I take very seriously,

it's promises I make to disembodied
spirits about looking after someone.

You'd have said anything to get
Pearl and Leo through that door.

No, Hal, don't be stupid,
this is your home now.

OK? And we're going to be very happy
here, the four of us.

God.

Annie,

yours is even better than mine

My... what?

Your mask.

Um...

OK.

Why are you crying?

You've got nothing to cry about.

Have you?

Me, on the other hand...

I should be crying.

My best friend is dead.

But it's difficult to shed tears
over a fool.

You made a fool of him.

Do it, do it, do it.

You made fools of us all.

The Messiah.

Thought you were going to destroy us.

- And do you know what? I welcomed
it. -

But now...

...I see how ridiculous it all is.

Do it.

You're not the Saviour.

No-one's ever going to stop us.

Do it, do it, do it, do it.

What are you doing?

I don't know.

Put her down.

I wasn't going to hurt her.

Put... her... down.

She's a defenceless child,
and you make me sick.

You're an animal.

I am an animal?! Jesus Christ.

I should kill you where you stand.

- Then why don't you?
- I want to.

I want to so much.
I've killed dozens of ya.

It doesn't get any harder.
Just gets more enjoyable.

Then do the world a favour, Tom.

Get rid of me.

I wouldn't kill anybody in Annie's
house.

And I wouldn't kill anybody
in front of baby Eve.

So, today's your lucky day.

But if I ever see you again, I'll
kill ya.

Now, get out.

I'm closing in five.

I was protecting Eve.

- Where is he now?
- I don't know and I don't care.

He's very dangerous, Tom.

I think we've established that much,
Annie.

Oh, this is my fault!

If you're thinking of buying,
make it quick,

cos...

What the hell do you want?

Piss off.

He had some blood on his face.

Jesus Christ!

Not quite!

- I'll shoot this time. I mean it!
- Go on, then, right through the
heart.

It won't stop me,
it won't even slow me down.

There he is!

My God!

Yes. I'd forgotten how all the others
did that too -

they all called for their God.
Funny - he never came.

- Got her, got her, got her.
- You got her?

Count backwards from ten.
Before you know, it'll all be over.

No, please, God, no. No, please, God,
no.

I'll start you off. Ten...

- Hal! Is this how you repay Leo?
- Shut up.

Not you. Count.

Nine.

Get away from him.

Why are you doing this?

I need to vent and I don't like him
much.

Now, leave, both of you.

- You promised Leo.
- I don't care.

He devoted his whole life to helping
you!

He should've known we can't change.
This is what I am.

- And this is what I am.
- Oh, Christ.

You kill him and I'll kill you.

OK.

OK.

Schoolboy error, Tom.

Well? I'm waiting. Make your move.

Stop this.

- Both of you.
- Annie, go home.

I don't want Eve seeing this.

Well, she's not going anywhere.

- For God's sake, take the baby and
leave. - Oh! You think you're men, do
you? Huh?

You think you're big and brave?

You are dancing around your pain -
both of you are.

Facing it head on -
now, that takes real courage.

And I'm not judging you,
because I've done it myself.

I've needed a god,

so I created one.

But, Tom, you're right. Eve is not a
god.

And my friends have not died in some
great, glorious master plan.

They just died.

And it hurts. It really hurts.

But I can't avoid feeling this pain
any longer,

because avoiding it leads to this.

So, if you two want to kill each
other, you will be taking one step
further away

from the man that your father
and your friend wanted you to be.

Now, can we please go home?

And his eyes...

They went black.

They turned...

...black.

And fangs.

He had fangs.

Black eyes... fangs.

I know what this must sound like.

I know you must think I'm mad.

But I swear it's true.

- And did either of them say their
names? - Yeah, yeah.

The other guy? He called him Hal.

He called him what?

Right.

- Um, milk, no sugar.
- Thank you very much.

And black with a splash of water.

And I went for a herbal.

Kiwi and strawberry.
It's been that sort of day.

You know, um, I was just thinking...

If it wasn't for Eve,
Leo wouldn't have come here,

so he probably wouldn't have told
Pearl how he felt,

which means she wouldn't have been
able to pass over.

I suppose so.

And, you know,
she brought us three together.

So she's been responsible for quite
a few miraculous things, you know,

even if she isn't... the Saviour.

I'm still hoping she is.

What?

I want it to be true.

I want her to kill us all.

Well... I think that covers it.

- And you'll find him, yeah?
- Oh, you can count on that.

What are you doing?

I'm afraid there's just one more
thing.

Something is coming for her.

- This is prophecy.
- This is serious.

We have enemies coming at us
from every angle.

Jesus, Annie!

Tomorrow, we're going to come back,
about ten o'clock,

teach your little doggy to play dead.

That's for me, isn't it?

Just in case I dealt with complaints
the old-fashioned way.

Are you getting weak?

Do you need to feed?