Being Erica (2009–2011): Season 4, Episode 4 - Born This Way - full transcript
Scott Galvin's reign at River Rock brings an entirely different corporate mentality, where everything is driven by his testosterone laden sense. The men have to be dudes, and the projects they will be working on reflect Scott's own interests. Even the name of the company has been re-branded to The Rock. As hard as he tries for the sake of keeping his job, Brent just doesn't fit into this new corporate image. Erica's advice of pitching an idea that brings his own sensibilities into the testosterone world of The Rock gets Brent fired. After the fact, Erica realizes that her advice was just a tired old cliché. That's when she learns that Brent is her next patient. To understand what is happening to Brent, Dr. Tom sends Erica back to high school and her dealings with a Québecois exchange student named J.C. Paget, who stayed with the Stranges for her two week exchange and who just didn't fit in. To get J.C. off her back, Erica at the time told J.C. just to be herself, which made J.C.'s life even worse for those two weeks. This time around, Erica vows to help J.C. fit in. Erica learns that she can change J.C.'s outer appearance, but in doing so she may expose J.C. to situations with which she isn't equipped to deal. As it applies to Brent, he has to decide if he should beg for his job back which ends up being a bit more cutthroat than he imagined, or find something else more to his own sensibilities. Erica also has to decide how to apply what she learned to her own issues with Adam, who wants to buy a motorcycle against her wishes, and he who refuses to take salsa lessons with her.
Previously on "Being Erica":
And the lucky
editor who will be leading us
through this
sexual revolution...
Erica Strange.
Business is war
and as you made crystal clear
at the festival of authors,
we are not friends.
You were looking out
for numero uno,
and Frank is either too naive
or in the early stages
of Alzheimer's
not to see that.
Julianne, Erica,
the boardroom.
Now.
I'm really sorry.
I was awful.
Why?
You really hurt me.
Let's just leave it
at that.
That was Dori from River Rock.
Your old boss, Frank Galvin,
had a heart attack.
♪ like a lightning bolt ♪
♪ you're heart will blow ♪
♪ and when it's time
you'll know ♪
♪ you just gotta ignite
the light ♪
♪ and let it shine ♪
♪ just own the night ♪
♪ like the Fourth of July ♪
♪ 'cause, baby,
you're a firework ♪
♪ come on,
let your colours burst ♪
♪ make 'em go
oh, oh, oh... ♪
♪ you're gonna leave 'em all in
awe, awe, awe... ♪
♪ Boom, boom, boom. ♪
♪ Boom, boom, boom. ♪
Look out, Katie Perry,
that was amazing.
Oh you're just saying that.
Beauty, brains,
and one bodacious
set of pipes.
Okay, so?
Who else wants to show
some talent? Adam?
No, I'm contributing
to your bottom line, okay?
Brent?
What do you say?
Don't think so, dude.
Yeah... so, since when
do you say "dude"?
Oh! Since Scott took over
River Rock.
Oh, excuse me.
"The Rock"
as it's now monikered.
Wait, wait, wait...
He calls it "the Rock"?
Yup. Things are changing
at the ol' double R.
Scott's rebranding--
It's all testosterone,
all the time.
Wow, that must be
a really hard adjustment.
Especially for you.
Why "especially"
for me?
Well...
you know, uh...
They kinda broke the mold
when they made you, Brent.
You are very unique.
Why? Because I'm a red-blooded
heterosexual
and a sassy bitch?
Exactly.
Well,
Brent is a trailblazer.
But now that the Rock
is changing,
I have to dial
that blaze down.
'Scuse me.
Well, that concludes
our fun-filled evening.
Oh. Uh...
Scratch that.
It seems we have
one last guest.
Put your hands together for...
Mr. Brent Kennedy!
Brent!
You signed up!
You wanted to see
my talent?
You got it,
on one condition.
What's that?
Oh, Brent,
what are you doing?
Take my hand
and watch my hips.
'Cause these hips?
These hips don't lie.
We are, all of us,
in the words of Katy Perry,
original, unique,
and one-of-a-kind.
And yet, we spend our lives
twisting ourselves into knots,
making ourselves smaller
or larger to fit in.
At school, at work,
at home,
we adapt;
We change.
And the truth is,
that's not always a bad thing.
Or is it?
Amazing!
Ooh la la!
♪
Being Erica 04x04 "Born This Way"
Original Air Date: October 17, 2011.
♪ It's clearer inside of me ♪
♪ who I will always be ♪
♪ open me up to my heart. ♪
♪ Feels like I'm seeing
in the dark. ♪
♪ Waking me up to my to heart ♪
♪ to do it all over ♪
♪ again and again
until the end. ♪
♪ The sum of my dreams. ♪
♪ And everything
I ever wanted to be. ♪
I could lie here all morning.
Mmm... you have to get
to a golf tournament.
Mmm. Yes...
Yes, I do.
Did you have fun
last night?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, Brent, he blew me away.
I mean, I had no idea
that he could dance like that.
Yeah, he's very light
on his feet.
Adam, Brent's not gay.
Oh, come on.
No, I'm serious.
I saw his, uh...
Heterosexuality
with my own eyes.
Trust me,
you don't wanna know.
Anyway, back to dancing.
Brent said that learning
the Salsa
is actually quite easy,
and everyone knows
that couples should do
new things together.
Yeah, the only kind of salsa
I like
comes in a little bowl
next to your Nachos.
I guess that I will
just have to work
at convincing you...
Later.
Oh...
I feel like a
bag of cotton candy.
Well, you look like
you're part of the team. okay?
And that's how you have to act
if I'm gonna continue
my winning streak.
You have to worry less
about our clothes
and more about...
Oh my God,
what is Brent wearing?
Wow. I don't know,
but it looks like
he borrowed it from my dad.
- 'Sup, ladies?
- Hi.
Who replaced fancy,
fancy Brent
with... with Mike Weir?
Hey, BK, we're up.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I'll watch out
for this one.
She spanked us good
last year.
Now it's our turn.
Yeah, let the spanking begin.
Payback is a bi-atch.
Come on, Julie-Jack.
You blame us for being
on the defense?
Everybody wrote off 50/50
as a doomed vanity project,
but here you two are,
stronger than ever.
Well, we are in it
to win it, Scott,
and I'm not just
talking golf.
Oh, I hear ya.
Credit where credit's
deserved.
You've built
an impressive business.
Thank you.
Might just be time
to take the money and run.
Well, if some media mogul
offered us a place in the Keys
and the right price...
So name it.
50/50's not for sale.
Oh. Suit yourselves.
Yeah!
Wow, you almost hit
that one.
465 yard dogleg right.
Don't go in the garbage.
Yeah, I got into the
garbage on this hole one day.
Double bogey.
It's a world a hurt.
Look out, Scott,
you got the bogey man
on your squad.
Gonna scare away
your good scores.
Okay.
Nice.
All right, BK,
put it out there, buddy.
Don't over-think it.
Boom!
Oh my God,
did you see that?
Dude!
Show me some love.
Ha!
Nobody told me we're rolling
with Tiger Woods today.
Sweet.
Nice hit.
Here you go.
Keep the change.
Well...
Look at you.
The rest of us are still out
on hell's half acre,
and here you are buying
a round for the boys.
I am not worthy.
What're you doing?
I'm worshipping at the altar
of my little chameleon.
You saw the tide turning,
and instead of going down
with the ship,
you stole a rowboat
and you steered yourself
towards the new world order.
So I took
some golf lessons...
Golf lessons.
Followed by a shopping spree
at...?
Sporting Life.
Mm. You know, when I heard
that Scott hired Sebastian.
I thought to myself:
Brent's days are numbered
at the Rock.
But after today?
You might just make it.
Might?
If you wanna survive
at the Rock,
you're gonna have to continue
being a little less Brent and--
A little more that.
You are not seriously
taking advice
from Thomas Friedken?
He made some good points.
Oh, Brent,
come on.
You don't even
drink beer.
Ugh!
Don't some people
put limes in these?
Could I do that?
No, it's not gonna help.
Look, Brent...
This isn't you.
I mean, look at you!
Hey, you gotta fake it
till you make it.
No, actually, you don't.
I mean, you can't.
What's your next book
gonna be?
"The History of the Hammer"?
"Extreme Fishing:
Babes, Bait, and Boats."
Brent!
It's what Scott Galvin wants
and he's my boss, Erica.
Okay.
Yeah, I get it.
But, you know...
Pitch him something
that you're passionate about
that also targets men.
It's not that easy.
Oh, why not?
Find Brent's version
of "Babes, Bait, and Boats"
and give him that.
Yo, BK!
We're holding up the course.
Whoa! What the hell?!
Have fun.
Morning.
My God, you...
you scared me.
What're you doing here?
Well, you said you wanted
to do something exciting
together?
- Mm-hm.
- Close your eyes.
Close your eyes.
Okay,
come with me.
- What is it?
- Keep 'em closed.
Keep 'em closed.
Almost there...
Okay, stop.
Open 'em.
It's a motorcycle.
Yeah. I always wanted a bike,
and I'd socked
some money away,
so when I saw this ad
on Craigslist...
What, you bought it?!
Yes, I did.
And for you...
Ta da!
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no.
Come on, let me
give you a ride to work.
You're in safe hands,
I promise.
Adam, you like your salsa
in a bowls;
I like my bikes with baskets
and streamers.
You think dancing is hot?
You haven't seen hot.
This baby has 50 horses.
Do you know
what that means?
Yeah, it means
it's dangerous.
I mean,
they're very dangerous.
You get in one accident
and you're just...
You're dead.
Oh, I'm sorry, Adam.
It's just...
It's just not my kind
of adventure.
Okay.
Morning, gentlemen.
BK, rocking
a different look today.
Just being me, boss.
Just being me.
All right...
Pitches, bitches.
Who's got something so hot
it sets my hair on fire?!
- Check it, big s...
- I have something...
Canadian males--
What two things do they love
more than anything?
- Barbeque.
- Oh.
Stanley Cup.
So, "MVP Barbeque:
Grilling with the Champs."
Anyone smell smoke?
Hmm?
Because that is my hair
on fire!
- Bedang!
- Yes!
Ungh!
Crushed it!
All right, all right,
let's keep this forest
fire blazing.
BK?
Well, with all this talk
of red meat and hockey,
it seems to me that
were ignoring
a significant
group of men.
In researching
this pitch,
I asked myself...
How can we be different?
How can we service men
in a new way?
And that's when
it came to me.
Urban Peacock.
The urban peacock will be
the definitive guide
for straight men
who want the style,
the moves,
and the know-how
of their gay counterparts.
Think Esquire Magazine
and "Queer Eye
for the Straight Guy"
all rolled into one
handy manual.
Yeah.
All right,
I'm gonna jam on it,
noodle it around a bit.
A'ight...
Yeah, who's up next?
You got a minute?
Scott, I know I was a bit
off-base with my pitch,
but I'm brainstorming here--
You familiar at all
with the work of Clint Eastwood?
I've seen
"Bridges of Madison County."
I'm thinking about
"Magnum Force."
Clint's got the line:
"A man's
got to know his limitations."
I'm re-branding the Rock.
Scott, please...
We can keep
pretending that you mesh, BK,
but I think it's best that
we just rip the band-aid off.
Fact is that it's clear,
in the long run,
this...
Ain't gonna work.
You know,
pop always appreciated
what you've done
for the company.
I think you'll find
the severance generous.
I can't believe it.
I gave years of my life
to that company.
And in one afternoon,
Scott ripped it all away.
Oh, honey,
Scott is an ass
and he's gonna regret this.
You know, Brent,
she's right.
And River Rock,
it's...
It's not the only game
in town.
I just got fired from the biggest
publishing house in the city.
Who's gonna want me now?
Brent,
it's gonna be okay.
Like Mother Superior
said to Maria:
"When the lord closes
a door,
somewhere he opens
a window."
Preferably from the top floor
of a very tall building.
I'm not like you two;
I can't open my own company.
I just wanted to keep my job.
Why did I do that?
Why did I pitch something
I knew, in my gut,
wasn't right for Scott?
I'm just gonna go
get some tissues.
Ugh...
Dr. Tom, I am supposed
to be helping people,
and I just helped Brent
right out of a job.
Well, why don't you
tell me about...
J.C.
No, look,
come on, with the list.
Didn't you hear
what I just said?
My stupid, cliche advice--
Just be yourself--
Just got Brent fired.
I mean, I don't...
I don't care about J.C.
right now.
I care about Brent.
So please send me back
to yesterday,
so I can keep
my big mouth shut.
Brent is your patient,
Erica.
Oh.
And if you wanna help him,
then I suggest that you
tell me about J.C.
Okay.
Um...
J.C.
Julie-Catherine
from Quebec?
Right!
It was like this twinned
exchange program thing,
where Sam went to Tremblant
for two weeks
and we got J.C.
And the poor thing,
she just didn't fit in.
She hardly spoke any English
and she dressed like a refugee
from a late '80s
heavy metal video.
Anyway....
One day,
she cornered me for advice.
You know, she wanted help
making friends
and fitting in.
And...
I just wanted her
to leave me alone,
so I said the easiest thing
that came to mind, you know?
Just be yourself.
And because I didn't actually
take the time to help J.C.,
she kept sticking out.
And I mean,
a week at that age?
It's...
It's forever.
So when she was leaving,
I gave her a hug
and I said something polite
like, "come back and visit."
And she just lost it.
You know,
she burst into tears
and said that she would
never come back,
and she blamed me
for trying to get rid of her,
for not helping her,
for the fact that...
It was the worst experience
of her life.
I could have helped her,
but I was just too caught up
in my own life.
And if you could go back?
Well, obviously, I...
I would try to help J.C.
fit in.
I mean, you know, look.
People, they don't always
like to admit it,
but sometimes
just "being yourself"
it isn't the right thing to do.
Just ask Brent.
Well, then, go back
and help J.C. be someone
that she's not.
Oh!
Whoa-oa-oa-oa!
Ungh!
Erica?
Okay...
I'm okay.
It's okay,
it's okay.
I'm, um... I'm okay.
Uh...
you're not. Your skirt.
- Whoa.. Oh yeah
- Oh!
Oh, don't worry.
Maybe we'll get
a higher price for you
with all the goods on display
in the window.
What're you talking about?
The auction
for the suicide prevention
help line?
"Buy a Babe." Best title ever!
Don't you guys think
it's just a little offensive?
We're selling ourselves
so at-risk youth
don't kill themselves?
Well, Erica,
maybe if Kurt Cobain
had someone to talk to,
he wouldn't have
committed suicide.
Oh my God, don't.
It's too fresh.
I'm not ready
to talk about it yet.
Hey, heard you put
on a peep show, Erica.
Any chance of an encore?
Ah, no pay,
no play, Zachary.
Keep it moving,
we'll see you at the auction.
Mm-mm.
Oh my God, this
is when it happens.
This is when Zach
and I hook up.
Because he buys me
at the auction
and then we start dating.
Wow! Over-confident much?
Jeez.
Well, excusez me,
monsieur!
So unfair.
Sam gets to spend
two glorious weeks in France.
In Quebec.
You get saddled
with bonhomme de loser.
You know what?
She's actually really nice,
and she doesn't have friends
or anyone to talk to.
And I think that we should
go sit with her.
What am I,
like UNICEF?
No.
You know, she cries
in her room every night.
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
I mean, she's having
the worst time.
But we have the power
to change that.
How?
Two words:
Make. Over.
Oh my God,
like on Ricki Lake?
Totally like on Ricki Lake.
So I'll meet you guys upstairs
in five minutes, okay?
We're gonna need clothes,
we're gonna makeup,
- and hair product.
- On it, on it, and on it.
Woo! Yeah!
Hey, J.C.
Erica, hi.
You know what?
What do you...
Say you and me spend
some girl-time together?
Okay. Heh.
What are we doing?
♪ Street's like a jungle ♪
Your hair is so beautiful.
♪ so call the police ♪
♪ following the herd ♪
♪ down to Greece ♪
Oh!
♪ on holiday ♪
♪ love in the 90's ♪
- Damn!
- I like it a lot!
See, sometimes,
I feel like we're here.
Voulez Rouge!
Oh perfect! Let's go!
♪ take your chances ♪
♪ looking for girls
who are boys ♪
♪ who like boys to be girls ♪
♪ who do boys
like they're girls ♪
Sha-wing!
Yo, yo, ladies.
French girl's rockin'
a new look.
I like.
I like a lot.
Party on, dudes!
Yeah, all right, okay.
Oh, hey, Erica,
don't worry,
I still got 30 bucks
with your name on it,
right here.
Lucky me!
My God, Brian cannot
keep his eyes off you.
You should totally join
the babe auction!
Oh yeah,
such a good idea.
You know, it could be fun
and a great way for you
to meet people.
Okay,
I will join this.
Oh! Great!
Our next babe
is the beautiful...
Jennifer Zahlen, everybody.
Jenny loves going to
the movies at the uptown,
is a huge Ace of Base fan,
and her claim to fame
is she appeared in an episode
of Degrassi High, everybody.
Our next babe, Erica,
is a natural redhead.
Fire above, fire below.
And she likes reading,
spending her summers
at Camp Tamawka,
and one day she hopes to write
something as beautiful
as "Clan of the Cave Bear."
Really?
We'll start the bidding off
$10 dollars.
Agh! $30 dollars!
Sold!
Zach Creed.
Erica Strange,
sold for $30 dollars.
Thank you.
Sold for $7 dollars.
And now for our
last Buy-a-Babe babe,
our Bella
from the Belle Provence,
J.C. Page.
Yeeeaaah!
J.C. Loves horseback riding,
and one day she hopes
to attend clown school.
We'll start the bidding off
at five dollars.
Ten!
Ten. Do I hear fifteen?
Thirty.
Thirty. Thirty-five?
Over here. Right here.
- Forty?
- Oh!
Fifty?
One hundred big ones,
right here!
Whoa!
Sold for $100 dollars.
Woo!
Yeah!
Oh my God, that is hi-larious.
That is so... so not right.
Jenny, Judith, check this out.
Who am I?
Goo-goo gah-gah,
Erica Strange.
Oh, oh, she's Princess Leia
and you're the fat green guy,
Jabba the Hut!
Zach! No.
Okay,
Erica Strange-ly boring.
If you don't,
uh, I don't know,
start to be more fun,
I am gonna exchange you.
Yeah,
couple minor niners.
Yo, Zack's babe,
hey, we still on
for tonight?
On for...?
Movie night
at your place?
Right, right.
Yeah!
Yeah, we're still on.
I can't wait.
Here, Zach's babe,
why don't you take my babe home
and get her ready
for tonight.
Our Masters are waiting.
we'll be by around seven.
- Okay?
- Okay. Bye.
This the most fun
I did since I arrived!
And maybe after tonight
I will have a boyfriend!
Oh! J.C., I'm so glad
that you're happy,
but you just have to remember
that it's a joke.
Like a... a game.
You don't really have
to do what he says.
I know, it's just fun.
You're the best big sister
I ever had.
Thank you, bye.
Okay, bye.
Ugh!
Oh...
Zach.
Stop that.
Oh, you know, Brian,
if, uh...
If you're gonna smoke
in here,
we should like probably
open a window.
Erica, would you
just chill out?!
It's just gonna like
reek in here.
Yeah, we'll hotbox the house.
Right?
That'd be awesome.
Hey, J.C.,
have you ever smoked before?
One time.
Euh, I cough a lot.
Oh...
You know, J.C.,
I'm not gonna partake tonight
and you don't have to either.
Hey, if you want,
I can teach you how to do it
so you don't cough.
Okay.
Take a small puff, 'kay,
and open your mouth,
let some cooler air in.
'Kay? And then hold it
and...
Exhale.
- Wooo!
- See?
Thank you, Brian.
Master Brian.
Master Brian.
Oh! I love you so much, girl!
- Whoa.
- So much. Mmm!
Oh, easy there,
tiger.
I know!
Let's order pizza.
I'm hungry,
are you hungry?
No.
Oh yeah, someone's
got the munchies.
Hey, J.C.,
you want the last drag?
Erica, she's fine, okay?
I mean...
My God, you're like
completely obsessed with her.
Well, she goes from
friendship bracelets
to high as a kite
in one day?
I don't think that
we're doing her any favours.
Okay, don't be a dork.
Yesterday she was crying
in her room,
and today she's, uh...
She's happy!
She's unrecognizable.
Oh man, she's cool.
I mean, she's gonna go
back to Quebec
a total happy camper,
right?
Right. Yeah.
Ooh! Pinot Grigio!
Oh, Jenny!
That's my mom's.
Hey, I got some beer in my van
if you wanna come get--
Wait a minute,
why am I asking?
You have to do everything
I say, right?
Right.
Oh!
Be it ever so humble.
It's nice.
I like it.
Well, you have to.
I own you till midnight.
Now, why don't you come
give master Brian
a little frenchie kiss.
Okay.
Come on, you can do
better than that.
Hey, relax.
I think we should go
back inside.
Okay?
Okay. Okay.
Oh, hey.
Jenny, have you seen J.C.?
Oh my God, Erica,
these taste like actual
dill pickles.
You want?
No, thank you.
Hey, that took you guys
a while.
Hey, Zach,
let's smoke another fattie.
Hey, J.C.
Is everything okay?
I wanna go home.
Hey.
What's wrong?
Did something happen
with Brian?
We did some stuff.
I let him...
And I didn't want to,
and I did and I...
Okay, look, just...
Just slow down, okay?
Tomorrow?
You're gonna go back
to being you.
Okay? You're gonna put
your J.C. clothes on--
No, that's not
what I'm saying.
Okay.
It's everything else--
getting high and...
And Brian and...
Oh, you probably think
I'm so sensitive.
No, I don't.
Not at all.
I think that even though
you're way younger than me...
I'm only one year younger
than you.
You're actually a lot smarter
than I was--
Than I am.
I tell you what.
You keep the hair
and the clothes,
and why don't we go
back in there,
watch a bad movie,
we'll hang out,
we'll tell Brian
to get a new babe.
Okay. Yeah.
And we'll just have fun.
How's that sound?
Okay.
On y va.
Oh, Brent,
if that's what you feel
you need to do then...
Of course,
I am 100 per cent behind you.
Thank you, Jules.
100 per cent
behind you doing what?
Begging for my job back.
I need to talk the talk
and walk the walk,
convince Scott
that I can do this.
Chinos, beer,
ultimate fighting.
I will out-guy every guy
in that office.
Brent, just hang on.
You know, you can do that
if you feel that you should.
But just don't go too far,
okay?
Just stay you.
I have a mortgage
and bills,
and the Rock is my home.
I don't care anymore.
I'm gonna do
whatever it takes.
It gotta admit, BK,
takes a lot of courage
to come down here
and admit your mistakes
like you have today.
You've shown me something
that you've never shown me
before;
That you got a pair of balls
on you, dude!
Should've shown you my balls
a long time ago!
Now, the thing is,
what I'm doing here,
it's about more
than just books.
It's about building a...
an empire.
I am down for whatever,
boss.
You see, sea bass here
used to work
at Cresthill Press.
And he told me
about their weaknesses,
and, well,
I'm about to close that deal.
You're buying
Cresthill Press.
As an appetizer.
I'm targeting all
the small independents.
Panda, Briar Park,
50/50...
Erica said 50/50
wasn't for sale.
More than one way
to skin a cat.
And if they don't
sell to us,
then we'll just
bankrupt them.
And I know that you're in good
with Erica and Julianne.
What're you asking me
to do?
I want you to track
every deal
that 50/50 has in the works,
go in and bid higher.
I don't care
if we lose money.
But we're taking them down
one way or another.
I don't know if I...
BK!
Oh... BK.
If you want to run
with the lions, hm?
You can't be friends
with the antelopes.
I know that you've done
this kind of thing before.
Excellente.
I respect the courage it takes
to come in here
and fight for your job.
Now I wanna see your loyalty.
Hey there!
Hey.
I brought you some dinner.
- Sushi?
- Chinese.
Well...
I, um...
I brought you something too.
- What is this?
- I don't know.
You tell me.
You look hot.
Yeah? Good.
'Cause I am never
taking this off.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I love it.
Oh, I was so bummed out
this morning,
thinking that you wouldn't
come round about the bike
and...
So why don't we go for a ride
before dinner?
I'll go really slowly
and I'll take the side roads.
I promise,
you'll be totally safe.
Adam, actually...
What?
Look, I mean, I get it.
Guys, they like motorcycles.
It's in your DNA--
You know, the danger
and the adrenaline surge.
But can't you just...
look the part instead?
Look the part?
That makes me sound crazy,
doesn't it?
Yeah.
Okay, well, call me crazy,
or overprotective,
or whatever you're gonna
accuse me of,
but, Adam,
when you're on a bike,
there's nothing between you
and the other cars.
There's nothing between you
and the road!
Which is the point!
It's a rush, Erica.
You wanted exciting.
Riding a bike is about
as exciting as it gets.
Even if it lands you
in the hospital?
Well, if that happens,
it happens.
Wow! I think that that's
the stupidest thing
that you've ever said to me.
- Really?
- Really.
Is it more stupid
than you buying me
some leather jacket
and expecting me
to sit in your apartment
and play dress-up?
Look, some of the guys are
going for a drink after work.
I think I'll just go
join 'em.
Okay.
Do whatever you have to do.
Okay.
Trouble in paradise?
Why do guys have
to be...
Guys? You know?
'Cause I swear that every
problem in this world,
it goes back to testosterone.
Takes two to Salsa.
You could put on
that helmet
and buy a leather jacket.
You said it yourself,
the ability to adapt is useful.
Well, obviously,
you know,
what do I know if the way
that I handled Brent and J.C.
is any indication?
Mm, I think you're being
too hard on yourself.
- Really?
- Yup.
Because I didn't help Brent
at all.
And I didn't do J.C.
any favours either.
I mean, I told Brent
to be himself
and it got him fired.
I told J.C.
to be someone else
and then she had a breakdown
in my kitchen.
The answer, Erica,
is there's no right answer.
There is no absolute
in this case.
It's a question
of finding the balance.
What doesn't bend, breaks,
right?
- Mm-hm.
- I mean, you need to bend,
in order to survive
in the world.
Conversely,
you bend too far...
So how do you know
how far to bend?
Well, that's
the million-dollar question,
isn't it?
And the answer is
it's different for everyone.
And the trick is,
knowing when to bend
and when not to.
Well, I think that
you should compromise.
Like a man who won't
take Salsa lessons
for his girlfriend.
Or a girlfriend
who won't get on the back
of a motorcycle for fun.
Point taken.
Oh no!
Whoa! Oh no!
Whoa! Lucky! You're lucky.
All me, all right.
Just cause you're my boss,
don't think
I won't kick your ass.
Come on! Come on! Agh!
Whoa! Ha ha ha! Wooo!
Come on, come on.
Whattaya got? Whattaya got?
Whattaya got?
Whattaya got?
Hey, BK, what's up?
Thank you
for the opportunity, Scott.
After all that, eh?
Thing is,
it turns out I'm not a lion.
I can dress like a lion.
I can learn to play foosball
and golf.
But I don't think
I like the way
the games around here
are being played.
Mm.
Good luck, Brent.
You too.
Me?
Why not you?
You're smart,
you're talented,
you've got an incredible eye
for books.
And you feel you could
trust me,
after everything that I did
to you last year?
Well, the boundaries
would have to be perfectly clear--
You would be
working for us.
Well, it seems you have
more faith in me
than I probably deserve.
You're an excellent editor,
Brent,
with marketable ideas.
And you didn't have to
tell us about Scott's evil offer.
So yeah,
we have faith in you.
And if the best defense
is a strong offense,
we want you fighting
on our team.
So, what do you say?
I will accept
with unseemly glee
and promise to bring
some sparkle to 50/50.
Aw!
So, should we shake on it?
Hey.
Hi.
I'm sorry
for walking out.
I'm sorry too.
Buying you a leather jacket
and expecting that
to replace this...
was ridiculous of me.
No, what was ridiculous
was me spending all my money
on a bike
that probably needs
a new gear box.
Ouch!
If...
I get on that bike,
you have to promise me
something...
Anything.
No highways
and no bad weather,
and none of that swerving
in and out of cars thing.
Deal.
Okay.
Okay.
What the hell.
- What are you doing?
- Just...
What...?
Go with it.
Oh, sorry.
It's okay.
This isn't even
Salsa music.
Well, then, teach me
one of the other dances
that you wanna learn,
like Ballroom
or "Meringue".
Uh, it's Merengue.
See, meringue is a dessert.
- Shut up and dance.
- I'm just saying.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
- It's okay, I have nine more.
♪ We will always be
best friends ♪
♪ and yeah, you will see me ♪
♪ ah ah-ah! ♪
♪ Again and again and again ♪
♪ la la-dee da da ♪
♪ Oh, we will always be
best friends. ♪
♪ And yeah, you will see me ♪
♪ again and again ♪
And the lucky
editor who will be leading us
through this
sexual revolution...
Erica Strange.
Business is war
and as you made crystal clear
at the festival of authors,
we are not friends.
You were looking out
for numero uno,
and Frank is either too naive
or in the early stages
of Alzheimer's
not to see that.
Julianne, Erica,
the boardroom.
Now.
I'm really sorry.
I was awful.
Why?
You really hurt me.
Let's just leave it
at that.
That was Dori from River Rock.
Your old boss, Frank Galvin,
had a heart attack.
♪ like a lightning bolt ♪
♪ you're heart will blow ♪
♪ and when it's time
you'll know ♪
♪ you just gotta ignite
the light ♪
♪ and let it shine ♪
♪ just own the night ♪
♪ like the Fourth of July ♪
♪ 'cause, baby,
you're a firework ♪
♪ come on,
let your colours burst ♪
♪ make 'em go
oh, oh, oh... ♪
♪ you're gonna leave 'em all in
awe, awe, awe... ♪
♪ Boom, boom, boom. ♪
♪ Boom, boom, boom. ♪
Look out, Katie Perry,
that was amazing.
Oh you're just saying that.
Beauty, brains,
and one bodacious
set of pipes.
Okay, so?
Who else wants to show
some talent? Adam?
No, I'm contributing
to your bottom line, okay?
Brent?
What do you say?
Don't think so, dude.
Yeah... so, since when
do you say "dude"?
Oh! Since Scott took over
River Rock.
Oh, excuse me.
"The Rock"
as it's now monikered.
Wait, wait, wait...
He calls it "the Rock"?
Yup. Things are changing
at the ol' double R.
Scott's rebranding--
It's all testosterone,
all the time.
Wow, that must be
a really hard adjustment.
Especially for you.
Why "especially"
for me?
Well...
you know, uh...
They kinda broke the mold
when they made you, Brent.
You are very unique.
Why? Because I'm a red-blooded
heterosexual
and a sassy bitch?
Exactly.
Well,
Brent is a trailblazer.
But now that the Rock
is changing,
I have to dial
that blaze down.
'Scuse me.
Well, that concludes
our fun-filled evening.
Oh. Uh...
Scratch that.
It seems we have
one last guest.
Put your hands together for...
Mr. Brent Kennedy!
Brent!
You signed up!
You wanted to see
my talent?
You got it,
on one condition.
What's that?
Oh, Brent,
what are you doing?
Take my hand
and watch my hips.
'Cause these hips?
These hips don't lie.
We are, all of us,
in the words of Katy Perry,
original, unique,
and one-of-a-kind.
And yet, we spend our lives
twisting ourselves into knots,
making ourselves smaller
or larger to fit in.
At school, at work,
at home,
we adapt;
We change.
And the truth is,
that's not always a bad thing.
Or is it?
Amazing!
Ooh la la!
♪
Being Erica 04x04 "Born This Way"
Original Air Date: October 17, 2011.
♪ It's clearer inside of me ♪
♪ who I will always be ♪
♪ open me up to my heart. ♪
♪ Feels like I'm seeing
in the dark. ♪
♪ Waking me up to my to heart ♪
♪ to do it all over ♪
♪ again and again
until the end. ♪
♪ The sum of my dreams. ♪
♪ And everything
I ever wanted to be. ♪
I could lie here all morning.
Mmm... you have to get
to a golf tournament.
Mmm. Yes...
Yes, I do.
Did you have fun
last night?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, Brent, he blew me away.
I mean, I had no idea
that he could dance like that.
Yeah, he's very light
on his feet.
Adam, Brent's not gay.
Oh, come on.
No, I'm serious.
I saw his, uh...
Heterosexuality
with my own eyes.
Trust me,
you don't wanna know.
Anyway, back to dancing.
Brent said that learning
the Salsa
is actually quite easy,
and everyone knows
that couples should do
new things together.
Yeah, the only kind of salsa
I like
comes in a little bowl
next to your Nachos.
I guess that I will
just have to work
at convincing you...
Later.
Oh...
I feel like a
bag of cotton candy.
Well, you look like
you're part of the team. okay?
And that's how you have to act
if I'm gonna continue
my winning streak.
You have to worry less
about our clothes
and more about...
Oh my God,
what is Brent wearing?
Wow. I don't know,
but it looks like
he borrowed it from my dad.
- 'Sup, ladies?
- Hi.
Who replaced fancy,
fancy Brent
with... with Mike Weir?
Hey, BK, we're up.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I'll watch out
for this one.
She spanked us good
last year.
Now it's our turn.
Yeah, let the spanking begin.
Payback is a bi-atch.
Come on, Julie-Jack.
You blame us for being
on the defense?
Everybody wrote off 50/50
as a doomed vanity project,
but here you two are,
stronger than ever.
Well, we are in it
to win it, Scott,
and I'm not just
talking golf.
Oh, I hear ya.
Credit where credit's
deserved.
You've built
an impressive business.
Thank you.
Might just be time
to take the money and run.
Well, if some media mogul
offered us a place in the Keys
and the right price...
So name it.
50/50's not for sale.
Oh. Suit yourselves.
Yeah!
Wow, you almost hit
that one.
465 yard dogleg right.
Don't go in the garbage.
Yeah, I got into the
garbage on this hole one day.
Double bogey.
It's a world a hurt.
Look out, Scott,
you got the bogey man
on your squad.
Gonna scare away
your good scores.
Okay.
Nice.
All right, BK,
put it out there, buddy.
Don't over-think it.
Boom!
Oh my God,
did you see that?
Dude!
Show me some love.
Ha!
Nobody told me we're rolling
with Tiger Woods today.
Sweet.
Nice hit.
Here you go.
Keep the change.
Well...
Look at you.
The rest of us are still out
on hell's half acre,
and here you are buying
a round for the boys.
I am not worthy.
What're you doing?
I'm worshipping at the altar
of my little chameleon.
You saw the tide turning,
and instead of going down
with the ship,
you stole a rowboat
and you steered yourself
towards the new world order.
So I took
some golf lessons...
Golf lessons.
Followed by a shopping spree
at...?
Sporting Life.
Mm. You know, when I heard
that Scott hired Sebastian.
I thought to myself:
Brent's days are numbered
at the Rock.
But after today?
You might just make it.
Might?
If you wanna survive
at the Rock,
you're gonna have to continue
being a little less Brent and--
A little more that.
You are not seriously
taking advice
from Thomas Friedken?
He made some good points.
Oh, Brent,
come on.
You don't even
drink beer.
Ugh!
Don't some people
put limes in these?
Could I do that?
No, it's not gonna help.
Look, Brent...
This isn't you.
I mean, look at you!
Hey, you gotta fake it
till you make it.
No, actually, you don't.
I mean, you can't.
What's your next book
gonna be?
"The History of the Hammer"?
"Extreme Fishing:
Babes, Bait, and Boats."
Brent!
It's what Scott Galvin wants
and he's my boss, Erica.
Okay.
Yeah, I get it.
But, you know...
Pitch him something
that you're passionate about
that also targets men.
It's not that easy.
Oh, why not?
Find Brent's version
of "Babes, Bait, and Boats"
and give him that.
Yo, BK!
We're holding up the course.
Whoa! What the hell?!
Have fun.
Morning.
My God, you...
you scared me.
What're you doing here?
Well, you said you wanted
to do something exciting
together?
- Mm-hm.
- Close your eyes.
Close your eyes.
Okay,
come with me.
- What is it?
- Keep 'em closed.
Keep 'em closed.
Almost there...
Okay, stop.
Open 'em.
It's a motorcycle.
Yeah. I always wanted a bike,
and I'd socked
some money away,
so when I saw this ad
on Craigslist...
What, you bought it?!
Yes, I did.
And for you...
Ta da!
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no.
Come on, let me
give you a ride to work.
You're in safe hands,
I promise.
Adam, you like your salsa
in a bowls;
I like my bikes with baskets
and streamers.
You think dancing is hot?
You haven't seen hot.
This baby has 50 horses.
Do you know
what that means?
Yeah, it means
it's dangerous.
I mean,
they're very dangerous.
You get in one accident
and you're just...
You're dead.
Oh, I'm sorry, Adam.
It's just...
It's just not my kind
of adventure.
Okay.
Morning, gentlemen.
BK, rocking
a different look today.
Just being me, boss.
Just being me.
All right...
Pitches, bitches.
Who's got something so hot
it sets my hair on fire?!
- Check it, big s...
- I have something...
Canadian males--
What two things do they love
more than anything?
- Barbeque.
- Oh.
Stanley Cup.
So, "MVP Barbeque:
Grilling with the Champs."
Anyone smell smoke?
Hmm?
Because that is my hair
on fire!
- Bedang!
- Yes!
Ungh!
Crushed it!
All right, all right,
let's keep this forest
fire blazing.
BK?
Well, with all this talk
of red meat and hockey,
it seems to me that
were ignoring
a significant
group of men.
In researching
this pitch,
I asked myself...
How can we be different?
How can we service men
in a new way?
And that's when
it came to me.
Urban Peacock.
The urban peacock will be
the definitive guide
for straight men
who want the style,
the moves,
and the know-how
of their gay counterparts.
Think Esquire Magazine
and "Queer Eye
for the Straight Guy"
all rolled into one
handy manual.
Yeah.
All right,
I'm gonna jam on it,
noodle it around a bit.
A'ight...
Yeah, who's up next?
You got a minute?
Scott, I know I was a bit
off-base with my pitch,
but I'm brainstorming here--
You familiar at all
with the work of Clint Eastwood?
I've seen
"Bridges of Madison County."
I'm thinking about
"Magnum Force."
Clint's got the line:
"A man's
got to know his limitations."
I'm re-branding the Rock.
Scott, please...
We can keep
pretending that you mesh, BK,
but I think it's best that
we just rip the band-aid off.
Fact is that it's clear,
in the long run,
this...
Ain't gonna work.
You know,
pop always appreciated
what you've done
for the company.
I think you'll find
the severance generous.
I can't believe it.
I gave years of my life
to that company.
And in one afternoon,
Scott ripped it all away.
Oh, honey,
Scott is an ass
and he's gonna regret this.
You know, Brent,
she's right.
And River Rock,
it's...
It's not the only game
in town.
I just got fired from the biggest
publishing house in the city.
Who's gonna want me now?
Brent,
it's gonna be okay.
Like Mother Superior
said to Maria:
"When the lord closes
a door,
somewhere he opens
a window."
Preferably from the top floor
of a very tall building.
I'm not like you two;
I can't open my own company.
I just wanted to keep my job.
Why did I do that?
Why did I pitch something
I knew, in my gut,
wasn't right for Scott?
I'm just gonna go
get some tissues.
Ugh...
Dr. Tom, I am supposed
to be helping people,
and I just helped Brent
right out of a job.
Well, why don't you
tell me about...
J.C.
No, look,
come on, with the list.
Didn't you hear
what I just said?
My stupid, cliche advice--
Just be yourself--
Just got Brent fired.
I mean, I don't...
I don't care about J.C.
right now.
I care about Brent.
So please send me back
to yesterday,
so I can keep
my big mouth shut.
Brent is your patient,
Erica.
Oh.
And if you wanna help him,
then I suggest that you
tell me about J.C.
Okay.
Um...
J.C.
Julie-Catherine
from Quebec?
Right!
It was like this twinned
exchange program thing,
where Sam went to Tremblant
for two weeks
and we got J.C.
And the poor thing,
she just didn't fit in.
She hardly spoke any English
and she dressed like a refugee
from a late '80s
heavy metal video.
Anyway....
One day,
she cornered me for advice.
You know, she wanted help
making friends
and fitting in.
And...
I just wanted her
to leave me alone,
so I said the easiest thing
that came to mind, you know?
Just be yourself.
And because I didn't actually
take the time to help J.C.,
she kept sticking out.
And I mean,
a week at that age?
It's...
It's forever.
So when she was leaving,
I gave her a hug
and I said something polite
like, "come back and visit."
And she just lost it.
You know,
she burst into tears
and said that she would
never come back,
and she blamed me
for trying to get rid of her,
for not helping her,
for the fact that...
It was the worst experience
of her life.
I could have helped her,
but I was just too caught up
in my own life.
And if you could go back?
Well, obviously, I...
I would try to help J.C.
fit in.
I mean, you know, look.
People, they don't always
like to admit it,
but sometimes
just "being yourself"
it isn't the right thing to do.
Just ask Brent.
Well, then, go back
and help J.C. be someone
that she's not.
Oh!
Whoa-oa-oa-oa!
Ungh!
Erica?
Okay...
I'm okay.
It's okay,
it's okay.
I'm, um... I'm okay.
Uh...
you're not. Your skirt.
- Whoa.. Oh yeah
- Oh!
Oh, don't worry.
Maybe we'll get
a higher price for you
with all the goods on display
in the window.
What're you talking about?
The auction
for the suicide prevention
help line?
"Buy a Babe." Best title ever!
Don't you guys think
it's just a little offensive?
We're selling ourselves
so at-risk youth
don't kill themselves?
Well, Erica,
maybe if Kurt Cobain
had someone to talk to,
he wouldn't have
committed suicide.
Oh my God, don't.
It's too fresh.
I'm not ready
to talk about it yet.
Hey, heard you put
on a peep show, Erica.
Any chance of an encore?
Ah, no pay,
no play, Zachary.
Keep it moving,
we'll see you at the auction.
Mm-mm.
Oh my God, this
is when it happens.
This is when Zach
and I hook up.
Because he buys me
at the auction
and then we start dating.
Wow! Over-confident much?
Jeez.
Well, excusez me,
monsieur!
So unfair.
Sam gets to spend
two glorious weeks in France.
In Quebec.
You get saddled
with bonhomme de loser.
You know what?
She's actually really nice,
and she doesn't have friends
or anyone to talk to.
And I think that we should
go sit with her.
What am I,
like UNICEF?
No.
You know, she cries
in her room every night.
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
I mean, she's having
the worst time.
But we have the power
to change that.
How?
Two words:
Make. Over.
Oh my God,
like on Ricki Lake?
Totally like on Ricki Lake.
So I'll meet you guys upstairs
in five minutes, okay?
We're gonna need clothes,
we're gonna makeup,
- and hair product.
- On it, on it, and on it.
Woo! Yeah!
Hey, J.C.
Erica, hi.
You know what?
What do you...
Say you and me spend
some girl-time together?
Okay. Heh.
What are we doing?
♪ Street's like a jungle ♪
Your hair is so beautiful.
♪ so call the police ♪
♪ following the herd ♪
♪ down to Greece ♪
Oh!
♪ on holiday ♪
♪ love in the 90's ♪
- Damn!
- I like it a lot!
See, sometimes,
I feel like we're here.
Voulez Rouge!
Oh perfect! Let's go!
♪ take your chances ♪
♪ looking for girls
who are boys ♪
♪ who like boys to be girls ♪
♪ who do boys
like they're girls ♪
Sha-wing!
Yo, yo, ladies.
French girl's rockin'
a new look.
I like.
I like a lot.
Party on, dudes!
Yeah, all right, okay.
Oh, hey, Erica,
don't worry,
I still got 30 bucks
with your name on it,
right here.
Lucky me!
My God, Brian cannot
keep his eyes off you.
You should totally join
the babe auction!
Oh yeah,
such a good idea.
You know, it could be fun
and a great way for you
to meet people.
Okay,
I will join this.
Oh! Great!
Our next babe
is the beautiful...
Jennifer Zahlen, everybody.
Jenny loves going to
the movies at the uptown,
is a huge Ace of Base fan,
and her claim to fame
is she appeared in an episode
of Degrassi High, everybody.
Our next babe, Erica,
is a natural redhead.
Fire above, fire below.
And she likes reading,
spending her summers
at Camp Tamawka,
and one day she hopes to write
something as beautiful
as "Clan of the Cave Bear."
Really?
We'll start the bidding off
$10 dollars.
Agh! $30 dollars!
Sold!
Zach Creed.
Erica Strange,
sold for $30 dollars.
Thank you.
Sold for $7 dollars.
And now for our
last Buy-a-Babe babe,
our Bella
from the Belle Provence,
J.C. Page.
Yeeeaaah!
J.C. Loves horseback riding,
and one day she hopes
to attend clown school.
We'll start the bidding off
at five dollars.
Ten!
Ten. Do I hear fifteen?
Thirty.
Thirty. Thirty-five?
Over here. Right here.
- Forty?
- Oh!
Fifty?
One hundred big ones,
right here!
Whoa!
Sold for $100 dollars.
Woo!
Yeah!
Oh my God, that is hi-larious.
That is so... so not right.
Jenny, Judith, check this out.
Who am I?
Goo-goo gah-gah,
Erica Strange.
Oh, oh, she's Princess Leia
and you're the fat green guy,
Jabba the Hut!
Zach! No.
Okay,
Erica Strange-ly boring.
If you don't,
uh, I don't know,
start to be more fun,
I am gonna exchange you.
Yeah,
couple minor niners.
Yo, Zack's babe,
hey, we still on
for tonight?
On for...?
Movie night
at your place?
Right, right.
Yeah!
Yeah, we're still on.
I can't wait.
Here, Zach's babe,
why don't you take my babe home
and get her ready
for tonight.
Our Masters are waiting.
we'll be by around seven.
- Okay?
- Okay. Bye.
This the most fun
I did since I arrived!
And maybe after tonight
I will have a boyfriend!
Oh! J.C., I'm so glad
that you're happy,
but you just have to remember
that it's a joke.
Like a... a game.
You don't really have
to do what he says.
I know, it's just fun.
You're the best big sister
I ever had.
Thank you, bye.
Okay, bye.
Ugh!
Oh...
Zach.
Stop that.
Oh, you know, Brian,
if, uh...
If you're gonna smoke
in here,
we should like probably
open a window.
Erica, would you
just chill out?!
It's just gonna like
reek in here.
Yeah, we'll hotbox the house.
Right?
That'd be awesome.
Hey, J.C.,
have you ever smoked before?
One time.
Euh, I cough a lot.
Oh...
You know, J.C.,
I'm not gonna partake tonight
and you don't have to either.
Hey, if you want,
I can teach you how to do it
so you don't cough.
Okay.
Take a small puff, 'kay,
and open your mouth,
let some cooler air in.
'Kay? And then hold it
and...
Exhale.
- Wooo!
- See?
Thank you, Brian.
Master Brian.
Master Brian.
Oh! I love you so much, girl!
- Whoa.
- So much. Mmm!
Oh, easy there,
tiger.
I know!
Let's order pizza.
I'm hungry,
are you hungry?
No.
Oh yeah, someone's
got the munchies.
Hey, J.C.,
you want the last drag?
Erica, she's fine, okay?
I mean...
My God, you're like
completely obsessed with her.
Well, she goes from
friendship bracelets
to high as a kite
in one day?
I don't think that
we're doing her any favours.
Okay, don't be a dork.
Yesterday she was crying
in her room,
and today she's, uh...
She's happy!
She's unrecognizable.
Oh man, she's cool.
I mean, she's gonna go
back to Quebec
a total happy camper,
right?
Right. Yeah.
Ooh! Pinot Grigio!
Oh, Jenny!
That's my mom's.
Hey, I got some beer in my van
if you wanna come get--
Wait a minute,
why am I asking?
You have to do everything
I say, right?
Right.
Oh!
Be it ever so humble.
It's nice.
I like it.
Well, you have to.
I own you till midnight.
Now, why don't you come
give master Brian
a little frenchie kiss.
Okay.
Come on, you can do
better than that.
Hey, relax.
I think we should go
back inside.
Okay?
Okay. Okay.
Oh, hey.
Jenny, have you seen J.C.?
Oh my God, Erica,
these taste like actual
dill pickles.
You want?
No, thank you.
Hey, that took you guys
a while.
Hey, Zach,
let's smoke another fattie.
Hey, J.C.
Is everything okay?
I wanna go home.
Hey.
What's wrong?
Did something happen
with Brian?
We did some stuff.
I let him...
And I didn't want to,
and I did and I...
Okay, look, just...
Just slow down, okay?
Tomorrow?
You're gonna go back
to being you.
Okay? You're gonna put
your J.C. clothes on--
No, that's not
what I'm saying.
Okay.
It's everything else--
getting high and...
And Brian and...
Oh, you probably think
I'm so sensitive.
No, I don't.
Not at all.
I think that even though
you're way younger than me...
I'm only one year younger
than you.
You're actually a lot smarter
than I was--
Than I am.
I tell you what.
You keep the hair
and the clothes,
and why don't we go
back in there,
watch a bad movie,
we'll hang out,
we'll tell Brian
to get a new babe.
Okay. Yeah.
And we'll just have fun.
How's that sound?
Okay.
On y va.
Oh, Brent,
if that's what you feel
you need to do then...
Of course,
I am 100 per cent behind you.
Thank you, Jules.
100 per cent
behind you doing what?
Begging for my job back.
I need to talk the talk
and walk the walk,
convince Scott
that I can do this.
Chinos, beer,
ultimate fighting.
I will out-guy every guy
in that office.
Brent, just hang on.
You know, you can do that
if you feel that you should.
But just don't go too far,
okay?
Just stay you.
I have a mortgage
and bills,
and the Rock is my home.
I don't care anymore.
I'm gonna do
whatever it takes.
It gotta admit, BK,
takes a lot of courage
to come down here
and admit your mistakes
like you have today.
You've shown me something
that you've never shown me
before;
That you got a pair of balls
on you, dude!
Should've shown you my balls
a long time ago!
Now, the thing is,
what I'm doing here,
it's about more
than just books.
It's about building a...
an empire.
I am down for whatever,
boss.
You see, sea bass here
used to work
at Cresthill Press.
And he told me
about their weaknesses,
and, well,
I'm about to close that deal.
You're buying
Cresthill Press.
As an appetizer.
I'm targeting all
the small independents.
Panda, Briar Park,
50/50...
Erica said 50/50
wasn't for sale.
More than one way
to skin a cat.
And if they don't
sell to us,
then we'll just
bankrupt them.
And I know that you're in good
with Erica and Julianne.
What're you asking me
to do?
I want you to track
every deal
that 50/50 has in the works,
go in and bid higher.
I don't care
if we lose money.
But we're taking them down
one way or another.
I don't know if I...
BK!
Oh... BK.
If you want to run
with the lions, hm?
You can't be friends
with the antelopes.
I know that you've done
this kind of thing before.
Excellente.
I respect the courage it takes
to come in here
and fight for your job.
Now I wanna see your loyalty.
Hey there!
Hey.
I brought you some dinner.
- Sushi?
- Chinese.
Well...
I, um...
I brought you something too.
- What is this?
- I don't know.
You tell me.
You look hot.
Yeah? Good.
'Cause I am never
taking this off.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I love it.
Oh, I was so bummed out
this morning,
thinking that you wouldn't
come round about the bike
and...
So why don't we go for a ride
before dinner?
I'll go really slowly
and I'll take the side roads.
I promise,
you'll be totally safe.
Adam, actually...
What?
Look, I mean, I get it.
Guys, they like motorcycles.
It's in your DNA--
You know, the danger
and the adrenaline surge.
But can't you just...
look the part instead?
Look the part?
That makes me sound crazy,
doesn't it?
Yeah.
Okay, well, call me crazy,
or overprotective,
or whatever you're gonna
accuse me of,
but, Adam,
when you're on a bike,
there's nothing between you
and the other cars.
There's nothing between you
and the road!
Which is the point!
It's a rush, Erica.
You wanted exciting.
Riding a bike is about
as exciting as it gets.
Even if it lands you
in the hospital?
Well, if that happens,
it happens.
Wow! I think that that's
the stupidest thing
that you've ever said to me.
- Really?
- Really.
Is it more stupid
than you buying me
some leather jacket
and expecting me
to sit in your apartment
and play dress-up?
Look, some of the guys are
going for a drink after work.
I think I'll just go
join 'em.
Okay.
Do whatever you have to do.
Okay.
Trouble in paradise?
Why do guys have
to be...
Guys? You know?
'Cause I swear that every
problem in this world,
it goes back to testosterone.
Takes two to Salsa.
You could put on
that helmet
and buy a leather jacket.
You said it yourself,
the ability to adapt is useful.
Well, obviously,
you know,
what do I know if the way
that I handled Brent and J.C.
is any indication?
Mm, I think you're being
too hard on yourself.
- Really?
- Yup.
Because I didn't help Brent
at all.
And I didn't do J.C.
any favours either.
I mean, I told Brent
to be himself
and it got him fired.
I told J.C.
to be someone else
and then she had a breakdown
in my kitchen.
The answer, Erica,
is there's no right answer.
There is no absolute
in this case.
It's a question
of finding the balance.
What doesn't bend, breaks,
right?
- Mm-hm.
- I mean, you need to bend,
in order to survive
in the world.
Conversely,
you bend too far...
So how do you know
how far to bend?
Well, that's
the million-dollar question,
isn't it?
And the answer is
it's different for everyone.
And the trick is,
knowing when to bend
and when not to.
Well, I think that
you should compromise.
Like a man who won't
take Salsa lessons
for his girlfriend.
Or a girlfriend
who won't get on the back
of a motorcycle for fun.
Point taken.
Oh no!
Whoa! Oh no!
Whoa! Lucky! You're lucky.
All me, all right.
Just cause you're my boss,
don't think
I won't kick your ass.
Come on! Come on! Agh!
Whoa! Ha ha ha! Wooo!
Come on, come on.
Whattaya got? Whattaya got?
Whattaya got?
Whattaya got?
Hey, BK, what's up?
Thank you
for the opportunity, Scott.
After all that, eh?
Thing is,
it turns out I'm not a lion.
I can dress like a lion.
I can learn to play foosball
and golf.
But I don't think
I like the way
the games around here
are being played.
Mm.
Good luck, Brent.
You too.
Me?
Why not you?
You're smart,
you're talented,
you've got an incredible eye
for books.
And you feel you could
trust me,
after everything that I did
to you last year?
Well, the boundaries
would have to be perfectly clear--
You would be
working for us.
Well, it seems you have
more faith in me
than I probably deserve.
You're an excellent editor,
Brent,
with marketable ideas.
And you didn't have to
tell us about Scott's evil offer.
So yeah,
we have faith in you.
And if the best defense
is a strong offense,
we want you fighting
on our team.
So, what do you say?
I will accept
with unseemly glee
and promise to bring
some sparkle to 50/50.
Aw!
So, should we shake on it?
Hey.
Hi.
I'm sorry
for walking out.
I'm sorry too.
Buying you a leather jacket
and expecting that
to replace this...
was ridiculous of me.
No, what was ridiculous
was me spending all my money
on a bike
that probably needs
a new gear box.
Ouch!
If...
I get on that bike,
you have to promise me
something...
Anything.
No highways
and no bad weather,
and none of that swerving
in and out of cars thing.
Deal.
Okay.
Okay.
What the hell.
- What are you doing?
- Just...
What...?
Go with it.
Oh, sorry.
It's okay.
This isn't even
Salsa music.
Well, then, teach me
one of the other dances
that you wanna learn,
like Ballroom
or "Meringue".
Uh, it's Merengue.
See, meringue is a dessert.
- Shut up and dance.
- I'm just saying.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
- It's okay, I have nine more.
♪ We will always be
best friends ♪
♪ and yeah, you will see me ♪
♪ ah ah-ah! ♪
♪ Again and again and again ♪
♪ la la-dee da da ♪
♪ Oh, we will always be
best friends. ♪
♪ And yeah, you will see me ♪
♪ again and again ♪