Beavis and Butt-Head (1993–2011): Season 2, Episode 20 - Sick - full transcript
When Beavis & Butt-Head are sick with the flu, they go to the doctor in hopes of getting subscribed to mind-altering cold medicine.
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HEROES
Tonight on "Cops".
- Police! Move it or dead!
- What?
Wow guns are cool!
Go for bust.
Tonight on "Cops".
This here is Bob down at
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
Come on down
and try one from our starter rifle.
Hey dude, wake up.
Whichever model of you after,
The skeets always fly down at
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
Is that that guy from "Cheers"?
Yeah. That's that Sam Malone guy.
- Hey Butt-Head, check out his eyes.
- That's cool!
I can do that.
Check this out.
Yes!
Wow.
This rules!
Wow.
- Cool!
- Yeah.
This video has bikini girls
and machine guns.
Yeah and you can see her cleavage.
- Is that Iggy Pop dude?
- No way.
- This guy can kick Iggy Pop´s ass.
- Yeah.
Wow, he's got a light in his mouth.
- If only all videos could be like this.
- Yeah.
That would be cool.
Hey there, welcome to
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
You boys 18?
No.
Let me start again.
Hey there, you boys 18?
No.
Six hours later...
Now, this how it works:
he yells "pull",
you pull the lever,
than he shoots what
come out, you got that?
Hey Beavis, pull my lever.
This is cool.
Push!
Pull!
Pull!
Pull!
Hey, maybe shoot up.
Yeah.
Pull!
...and we'll be getting up to about a
15.000 feet...
If you look after your left right now,
you'll see a shimmering
sea of trailer homes.
Like the fact you...
Wow! You bet the Jumbojet.
Do I get to keep it?
Wow, cool!
Oh my God! Someone's here!
Thank God! Help us!
Help us!
We're trapped in here!
Please!
We have to pregnant women on board!
- How did that happen?
- Yeah.
Look on the door!
There is some instructions!
Please, help us get out!
In.. case... of...
...pull... hand...l...
That's hard.
Hey Butt-Head, pull my finger!
No way.
Pull my leg!
Please! Just help!
Send someone!
Pull my lever!
Is this "Spinal Tap".
"Tap" is cool.
This isn't "Spinal Tap".
- This sucks!
- Yeah, this sucks!
Where'd these guys get their clothes?
They bought it at that rock
and roll store at the mall.
Yeah.
- Wow, look at his face!
- Yeah.
His face sucks!
I think these guys played
at the state fair last year?
Yeah.
They won a blue ribbon
in the pig contest.
Yeah.
Because he's fat!
- Shut up! Shut up!
- Yeah. Shut up!
You suck!
Stop! In the name of all
that which does not suck!
He has morning wood.
Morning wood is cool.
Sometimes I get morning wood
in the late afternoon.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Cool!
Settle down Beavis.
- Is that a dog?
- Yeah, dogs are cool.
Wow.
It's that dude... "The Grim Rapper".
Yeah. That's that dude with
that curved knife.
Whenever you see that dude
it means you're, like, gonna die.
Hey Butt-head, is that
mean we're gonna die?
Yeah.
- Cool!
- Yeah.
This is gonna be cool!
The mystery of down flight 404
has been solved today.
Survivors of the plane
which disappeared last Wednesday,
say that 2 young men,
pictured in this police sketch taunted
crew and passengers with hope of rescue.
But left the crash site when they
we're distracted by their own flatulence.
- Hey, move over!
- President Clinton was quoted this thing
and it a sad commentary
on the youth of America.
When the preoccupation with flatulence
takes precedence over human life.
Hey Butt-head...
does this suck?
- It's loud, that's pretty cool.
- Yeah.
It's loud.
Wow, is that Sean Penn?
Who is he?
He is that dude who had
sexual intercourse with Madonna.
Oh, yeah.
Hey Butt-Head, this guy has the
same last name as you.
Yeah.
Head.
Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
That was cool.
---
HEROES
Tonight on "Cops".
- Police! Move it or dead!
- What?
Wow guns are cool!
Go for bust.
Tonight on "Cops".
This here is Bob down at
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
Come on down
and try one from our starter rifle.
Hey dude, wake up.
Whichever model of you after,
The skeets always fly down at
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
Is that that guy from "Cheers"?
Yeah. That's that Sam Malone guy.
- Hey Butt-Head, check out his eyes.
- That's cool!
I can do that.
Check this out.
Yes!
Wow.
This rules!
Wow.
- Cool!
- Yeah.
This video has bikini girls
and machine guns.
Yeah and you can see her cleavage.
- Is that Iggy Pop dude?
- No way.
- This guy can kick Iggy Pop´s ass.
- Yeah.
Wow, he's got a light in his mouth.
- If only all videos could be like this.
- Yeah.
That would be cool.
Hey there, welcome to
"Bob's Fancy Skeet".
You boys 18?
No.
Let me start again.
Hey there, you boys 18?
No.
Six hours later...
Now, this how it works:
he yells "pull",
you pull the lever,
than he shoots what
come out, you got that?
Hey Beavis, pull my lever.
This is cool.
Push!
Pull!
Pull!
Pull!
Hey, maybe shoot up.
Yeah.
Pull!
...and we'll be getting up to about a
15.000 feet...
If you look after your left right now,
you'll see a shimmering
sea of trailer homes.
Like the fact you...
Wow! You bet the Jumbojet.
Do I get to keep it?
Wow, cool!
Oh my God! Someone's here!
Thank God! Help us!
Help us!
We're trapped in here!
Please!
We have to pregnant women on board!
- How did that happen?
- Yeah.
Look on the door!
There is some instructions!
Please, help us get out!
In.. case... of...
...pull... hand...l...
That's hard.
Hey Butt-Head, pull my finger!
No way.
Pull my leg!
Please! Just help!
Send someone!
Pull my lever!
Is this "Spinal Tap".
"Tap" is cool.
This isn't "Spinal Tap".
- This sucks!
- Yeah, this sucks!
Where'd these guys get their clothes?
They bought it at that rock
and roll store at the mall.
Yeah.
- Wow, look at his face!
- Yeah.
His face sucks!
I think these guys played
at the state fair last year?
Yeah.
They won a blue ribbon
in the pig contest.
Yeah.
Because he's fat!
- Shut up! Shut up!
- Yeah. Shut up!
You suck!
Stop! In the name of all
that which does not suck!
He has morning wood.
Morning wood is cool.
Sometimes I get morning wood
in the late afternoon.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Cool!
Settle down Beavis.
- Is that a dog?
- Yeah, dogs are cool.
Wow.
It's that dude... "The Grim Rapper".
Yeah. That's that dude with
that curved knife.
Whenever you see that dude
it means you're, like, gonna die.
Hey Butt-head, is that
mean we're gonna die?
Yeah.
- Cool!
- Yeah.
This is gonna be cool!
The mystery of down flight 404
has been solved today.
Survivors of the plane
which disappeared last Wednesday,
say that 2 young men,
pictured in this police sketch taunted
crew and passengers with hope of rescue.
But left the crash site when they
we're distracted by their own flatulence.
- Hey, move over!
- President Clinton was quoted this thing
and it a sad commentary
on the youth of America.
When the preoccupation with flatulence
takes precedence over human life.
Hey Butt-head...
does this suck?
- It's loud, that's pretty cool.
- Yeah.
It's loud.
Wow, is that Sean Penn?
Who is he?
He is that dude who had
sexual intercourse with Madonna.
Oh, yeah.
Hey Butt-Head, this guy has the
same last name as you.
Yeah.
Head.
Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
- Butt-Head!
That was cool.