Beavis and Butt-Head (1993–2011): Season 2, Episode 16 - Way Down Mexico Way - full transcript
Beavis and Butt-Head take a trip to Mexico and on their way back to the States they are questioned by border agents.
WAY DOWN
MEXICO WAY
"Pass the Old El Crasso,
taste the awesome quest".
- Pass the Old El Crasso
- Pass the Old El Crasso
- Tensions of the west.
- Hey, Beavis,
Pass the Old El Crasso.
Change it, dude.
Hey guys! Welcome back
to video wonderland.
This guy is a chode smoker.
They all are.
And here is a classic that you definitely
won't hear on Mexican radio.
"Wall of Voodoo"'s Mexican radio.
- It's a message, dude.
- A sign from our master.
I like when those bull's horns
tear up in a guy's stomach.
- And you can see his guts.
- Yeah.
One day in school, when
I was, like, paying attention,
They were teaching us about how cows
have 4 separate butts.
They can, like, digest their
food in each butt.
And they spit it up.
And they, like, chewed their crude.
That would be cool
if we had, like, 4 butts.
- I mean, like, 4 butts each.
- Yeah.
Than we would have, like,
7 butts all together.
That would be cool.
Yes!
These guys rock!
That would be cool.
if that guy jumped off the stage
and nobody caught him.
And he smashed his
head on the floor.
Yeah, yeah.
And then his...
then his head would crack open.
And there will be, like, blood
everywhere and brains.
That would be be cool.
Yeah, what if somebody starting slipping
around on his blood and brains.
And then he cracked his head open.
And than everybody was slipping
around on blood.
Yeah cracking their heads open.
That's like that movie.
Where that guy was riding in that
car and his, like, head exploded.
This is out of focus.
That sucks.
Hey, Beavis, there's
too many dudes in this video.
Yeah, there's no chicks
in sweaty t-shirts.
Let's see if we can get
scrambled porno flicks on UHF.
That would be cool.
Thanks for taking us
to Mexico, Dave.
This riding ain't free, boys.
Remember, I got
business down there.
And you are part
of the management team.
This is cool.
Yeah.
You boys ever been
to Mexico before?
Well, ain't no law down there.
It's every man for himself.
But take no prisoners
Well, actually they took a few.
And they torture them.
Cool.
Yeah, they don't care what you do.
Until you cross 'em.
It's a whole different world
down there.
We can buy fireworks, right? Like,
M-80's and stuff?
Fireworks, guns, wives, slaves
and dangerous species.
Hell, they got everything
down there.
Did he said fireworks?
We're almost there.
Cool.
Okay we'll meet back
here in 5 hours.
El Gringo!
Hey, Gringo, I'll kick you ass.
Let's go get some M-80's.
Cool.
Fireworks?
Fireworks?
M-80's?
Firecrackers?
Fireworks?
These people are stupid.
Yeah.
2 Tacos.
Uno (One).
- He wants a buck.
- Why didn't he say so.
Here doggy.
Here boy.
Here you go.
- Here doggy.
- Go for it.
Pass the old El Paso.
Cool.
- Water.
- Water.
Tenemos agua excelente en Mexico!
(We have excellent water here in Mexico!)
Is this foreign?
Yeah.
Check it out, Beavis.
She's got money
on her head.
Yeah,
money is cool.
She's gonna take all
that money on her head.
And go play video games.
On her horse.
- Yeah. Is this "Alla Hebdula"?
- Yeah.
Is this video about Jesus?
Yeah, Christ is cool.
- Yes!
- Cool!
Yeah!
Chains and chicks.
- That's more like it!
- Yeah.
Sluts are cool.
Hey, Beavis, have you ever
drank a beer?
- Yeah
- Oh, yeah? Where did you get it?
This, like, guy gave it to me.
You haven't drink
a beer, lying wuss.
I should, like, join this band.
Yeah, these chicks
would talk to us.
They talk to me.
Then they tell you get
your sorry-ass out of there.
Yeah, Rock N' Roll is cool.
Wow!
- Hey, Butt-Head?
- Yeah?
Cool, dude.
Check this out.
Mexico is cool.
She wants something.
Is that "Dianne Reeves"?
Yeah.
Depeche Mode is French
for "We are wussies".
Yeah.
Don't feel me, dude.
You can see parts
of her's thingies.
"This is the morning
of our love"
- Yes!
- Yes!
Yes! Yes!
No! No!.
Show the chick.
- Yes! Yes! Yes!
- Yes! Yes!
- No! No! No!
- No! No! No!
This sucks!
He's looking at you, Beavis.
He wants you.
No way.
Tattoos are pretty cool.
For a wussy.
We can't leave Mexico
without fireworks, dude.
- Check it out.
- Cool.
That game was cool.
Rico.
Suave.
Rico.
Suave.
Wow.
Ricoro, burritos, tacos.
Rabbaddadda.
Yeah,
guacamole.
That was cool.
Hey, Butt-Head, what's
a gigolo?
That's, like, one of
those really fat dudes
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Change it.
If I got a
hat like that.
I could be a lead singer.
I would be cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is stupid.
Yeah,
I like the fire,
but they need some
chicks in tight shorts.
Then it would be cool.
Yeah, with close-ups on her butt.
Yeah.
Yes!
It's about time
they play something cool.
Yeah.
This guy kicks-ass.
- This guy looks like Jesus.
- Yeah.
Christ is cool.
Wow, Seattle kicks-ass.
Yeah. Is everybody
in Seattle cool?
Yeah, if you go to Seattle
anybody you see is cool.
- We should go, dude.
- Yeah, yeah.
That's that dude from
the spin doctors.
He jams with
"Soundgarden" sometimes.
Alto! El Gringo!
(Foreigner, stop)
Come on, get in!
Alto, alto, Gringo, Gringo.
El Gringo.
That's time for you, guys,
to earn your keep.
Look in the glovebox.
Oh, no. Dave is gonna
boof us.
Time to fill 'em, boys.
I can't fill that.
With these, dork!
Pills. Cool.
All these stuff is legal
in Mexico,
and it's cheap too if
you know the right people.
Border is coming up. Better swallow
those rubbers, boys.
Make sure you
tie 'em a couple of times.
It's a ruff ride
to a digestive track.
Cool!
You, boys, did remember
to tie off those condoms,
before you swallowed
them, right?
You, boys, got
some identification?
ID?
You got ID?
No.
Get out of the car.
All of you.
So, you thought you'd
come down to Mexico,
and pick up a
couple of immigrants, huh?
Smuggles some illegals in, huh?
Is that your game?
These guys live in my
town. They are Americans.
What's the capital of Texas, son? Huh?
I said, what's the
capital of Texas?
It's Austin, man.
Let him go.
- What?
- They are obviously Americans.
Mexicans know the
capital of Texas.
Mexicans would care that they
being interrogated by the border patrol.
Those 2 are American
as they come.
Butthole.
No way.
God bless America.
Yes!
This kicks-ass.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Brian Johnson looks
like he's taking a dump.
Yeah, he's constipated, 'cause he is old
Hey, Beavis, you think we're on,
like, a highway to hell?
Yeah.
These guys dress cool.
Yeah, they always
wear the same thing.
Yeah.
Hey, we always
wear the same thing.
Yeah.
I had this shirt
on for 6 months.
Yeah, I had this
shirt on for 7 months.
That was cool.
What if you light one of
these in Dave's butt?
That would be cool.
Peckerwood.
I can't believe he made
us walk back from the border.
Mexico sucks.
Wow.
Special defect.
Hey, that's that dude that
works down at boot warehouse.
No way, that dude
works at leadership dodge.
On central half
of mile north of Walmart.
Hey, that was a wipe.
Yeah,
an asswipe.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Hey, Butt-Head,
I heard these guys are bilingual.
Yeah, these guys are
all sexual perverts.
That dude in the back,
he's got too linguals.
MEXICO WAY
"Pass the Old El Crasso,
taste the awesome quest".
- Pass the Old El Crasso
- Pass the Old El Crasso
- Tensions of the west.
- Hey, Beavis,
Pass the Old El Crasso.
Change it, dude.
Hey guys! Welcome back
to video wonderland.
This guy is a chode smoker.
They all are.
And here is a classic that you definitely
won't hear on Mexican radio.
"Wall of Voodoo"'s Mexican radio.
- It's a message, dude.
- A sign from our master.
I like when those bull's horns
tear up in a guy's stomach.
- And you can see his guts.
- Yeah.
One day in school, when
I was, like, paying attention,
They were teaching us about how cows
have 4 separate butts.
They can, like, digest their
food in each butt.
And they spit it up.
And they, like, chewed their crude.
That would be cool
if we had, like, 4 butts.
- I mean, like, 4 butts each.
- Yeah.
Than we would have, like,
7 butts all together.
That would be cool.
Yes!
These guys rock!
That would be cool.
if that guy jumped off the stage
and nobody caught him.
And he smashed his
head on the floor.
Yeah, yeah.
And then his...
then his head would crack open.
And there will be, like, blood
everywhere and brains.
That would be be cool.
Yeah, what if somebody starting slipping
around on his blood and brains.
And then he cracked his head open.
And than everybody was slipping
around on blood.
Yeah cracking their heads open.
That's like that movie.
Where that guy was riding in that
car and his, like, head exploded.
This is out of focus.
That sucks.
Hey, Beavis, there's
too many dudes in this video.
Yeah, there's no chicks
in sweaty t-shirts.
Let's see if we can get
scrambled porno flicks on UHF.
That would be cool.
Thanks for taking us
to Mexico, Dave.
This riding ain't free, boys.
Remember, I got
business down there.
And you are part
of the management team.
This is cool.
Yeah.
You boys ever been
to Mexico before?
Well, ain't no law down there.
It's every man for himself.
But take no prisoners
Well, actually they took a few.
And they torture them.
Cool.
Yeah, they don't care what you do.
Until you cross 'em.
It's a whole different world
down there.
We can buy fireworks, right? Like,
M-80's and stuff?
Fireworks, guns, wives, slaves
and dangerous species.
Hell, they got everything
down there.
Did he said fireworks?
We're almost there.
Cool.
Okay we'll meet back
here in 5 hours.
El Gringo!
Hey, Gringo, I'll kick you ass.
Let's go get some M-80's.
Cool.
Fireworks?
Fireworks?
M-80's?
Firecrackers?
Fireworks?
These people are stupid.
Yeah.
2 Tacos.
Uno (One).
- He wants a buck.
- Why didn't he say so.
Here doggy.
Here boy.
Here you go.
- Here doggy.
- Go for it.
Pass the old El Paso.
Cool.
- Water.
- Water.
Tenemos agua excelente en Mexico!
(We have excellent water here in Mexico!)
Is this foreign?
Yeah.
Check it out, Beavis.
She's got money
on her head.
Yeah,
money is cool.
She's gonna take all
that money on her head.
And go play video games.
On her horse.
- Yeah. Is this "Alla Hebdula"?
- Yeah.
Is this video about Jesus?
Yeah, Christ is cool.
- Yes!
- Cool!
Yeah!
Chains and chicks.
- That's more like it!
- Yeah.
Sluts are cool.
Hey, Beavis, have you ever
drank a beer?
- Yeah
- Oh, yeah? Where did you get it?
This, like, guy gave it to me.
You haven't drink
a beer, lying wuss.
I should, like, join this band.
Yeah, these chicks
would talk to us.
They talk to me.
Then they tell you get
your sorry-ass out of there.
Yeah, Rock N' Roll is cool.
Wow!
- Hey, Butt-Head?
- Yeah?
Cool, dude.
Check this out.
Mexico is cool.
She wants something.
Is that "Dianne Reeves"?
Yeah.
Depeche Mode is French
for "We are wussies".
Yeah.
Don't feel me, dude.
You can see parts
of her's thingies.
"This is the morning
of our love"
- Yes!
- Yes!
Yes! Yes!
No! No!.
Show the chick.
- Yes! Yes! Yes!
- Yes! Yes!
- No! No! No!
- No! No! No!
This sucks!
He's looking at you, Beavis.
He wants you.
No way.
Tattoos are pretty cool.
For a wussy.
We can't leave Mexico
without fireworks, dude.
- Check it out.
- Cool.
That game was cool.
Rico.
Suave.
Rico.
Suave.
Wow.
Ricoro, burritos, tacos.
Rabbaddadda.
Yeah,
guacamole.
That was cool.
Hey, Butt-Head, what's
a gigolo?
That's, like, one of
those really fat dudes
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Change it.
If I got a
hat like that.
I could be a lead singer.
I would be cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is stupid.
Yeah,
I like the fire,
but they need some
chicks in tight shorts.
Then it would be cool.
Yeah, with close-ups on her butt.
Yeah.
Yes!
It's about time
they play something cool.
Yeah.
This guy kicks-ass.
- This guy looks like Jesus.
- Yeah.
Christ is cool.
Wow, Seattle kicks-ass.
Yeah. Is everybody
in Seattle cool?
Yeah, if you go to Seattle
anybody you see is cool.
- We should go, dude.
- Yeah, yeah.
That's that dude from
the spin doctors.
He jams with
"Soundgarden" sometimes.
Alto! El Gringo!
(Foreigner, stop)
Come on, get in!
Alto, alto, Gringo, Gringo.
El Gringo.
That's time for you, guys,
to earn your keep.
Look in the glovebox.
Oh, no. Dave is gonna
boof us.
Time to fill 'em, boys.
I can't fill that.
With these, dork!
Pills. Cool.
All these stuff is legal
in Mexico,
and it's cheap too if
you know the right people.
Border is coming up. Better swallow
those rubbers, boys.
Make sure you
tie 'em a couple of times.
It's a ruff ride
to a digestive track.
Cool!
You, boys, did remember
to tie off those condoms,
before you swallowed
them, right?
You, boys, got
some identification?
ID?
You got ID?
No.
Get out of the car.
All of you.
So, you thought you'd
come down to Mexico,
and pick up a
couple of immigrants, huh?
Smuggles some illegals in, huh?
Is that your game?
These guys live in my
town. They are Americans.
What's the capital of Texas, son? Huh?
I said, what's the
capital of Texas?
It's Austin, man.
Let him go.
- What?
- They are obviously Americans.
Mexicans know the
capital of Texas.
Mexicans would care that they
being interrogated by the border patrol.
Those 2 are American
as they come.
Butthole.
No way.
God bless America.
Yes!
This kicks-ass.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Brian Johnson looks
like he's taking a dump.
Yeah, he's constipated, 'cause he is old
Hey, Beavis, you think we're on,
like, a highway to hell?
Yeah.
These guys dress cool.
Yeah, they always
wear the same thing.
Yeah.
Hey, we always
wear the same thing.
Yeah.
I had this shirt
on for 6 months.
Yeah, I had this
shirt on for 7 months.
That was cool.
What if you light one of
these in Dave's butt?
That would be cool.
Peckerwood.
I can't believe he made
us walk back from the border.
Mexico sucks.
Wow.
Special defect.
Hey, that's that dude that
works down at boot warehouse.
No way, that dude
works at leadership dodge.
On central half
of mile north of Walmart.
Hey, that was a wipe.
Yeah,
an asswipe.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Hey, Butt-Head,
I heard these guys are bilingual.
Yeah, these guys are
all sexual perverts.
That dude in the back,
he's got too linguals.