Batwoman (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 11 - An Un-Birthday Present - full transcript

The Kane sisters contend with demons from the past on their birthday; an unexpected guest makes a surprise appearance in Gotham.

Happy birthday!

How did you get in here?

Uh, easy. Hey. Did you guys fire

that hot front desk guy?

Because he was the
best part of this place.

Hi.

I'm back.

♪ Happy birthday ♪

- Did Sophie let you go?
- Who?

Kate, I finally come home
from a semester abroad,

and this is how you react?



It's bad enough that they converted

my apartment into a boys' dorm room,

and no one chose to tell... Kate!

Who are you?

What's wrong with you?

Ow, ow!

Who are you?!

It's me. It's Beth.

Beth?

Who the hell else would I be?

Ow! Kate... you're hurting me.

Not yet, but I will.

Aah! Argh! Agh!

Ugh!



Are there any lions
or tigers about here?

It's only the Red King snoring.

Happy birthday, Beth.

You remembered.

I hope you like blueberry.

I, uh... I got you a present.

I found this out by the shed.

- It's a kitty!
- Shh.

My dad can't know.

Has to be a secret.

Hi, little guy.

What are you gonna call him?

Chessy. You'll be our Cheshire Cat.

Johnny tells me it's your birthday.

Beth, you're very lucky to have

such a kind and thoughtful friend.

I suppose...

It wouldn't be official

without making a wish.

What'd you wish for?

To see my sister and father.

Beth...

if you say your wish out loud,

it means it will never come true.

Time for your classes, Johnny.

Beth's dead. Whatever happened

to her in that house erased
all traces of my daughter.

She's gone. Don't make
the mistake I made.

It'd be a mistake to not
even try to interrogate Alice.

So she can prattle off a bunch
of nonsensical nursery rhymes?

Or incriminate herself.

I appreciate the attempt,
but you're not getting

a confession out of her.

- It's too big a risk.
- Risk of what?

Letting Alice into your head.

Let's just keep her
on ice until she can be

transferred to Arkham.

After that, she's their problem.

Were you planning on telling
me that Alice escaped?

What are you talking about?

She showed up at my office just now.

That's impossible.

She's been in a holding cell

for the last 8 hours.

Is that a live feed?

Yes, with two guards at the door.

She's downstairs. You're
welcome to see for yourself.

I swear I just saw her.

Then you're not the only one.

Mary saw her, too.

I took prints off the messenger bag

the Alice lookalike left behind.

They're an exact match
for Alice's prints

in The Crows' database.

And look. There's more.

I found this in her wallet.

Now it's not in the system,

but that is hands down the
best fake I.D. I've ever seen.

Somebody went to a lot of trouble.

You're telling me.

Apparently, she wrote
a 300-page dissertation

on "theoretical extragalactic
astrophysics and cosmology".

Maybe there's some answers in here.

It's locked with a security code,

but I might be able to
crack it in a couple hours.

Or...

- "Waffles".
- How'd you know that?

Beth always used it.

The only password she
could ever remember.

Okay.

Oh, my God! How are you and her...

I don't know.

You two seem really close.

We should tell your dad about this.

No. Not until we figure
out what's going on.

- Uh-uh.
- Wait. Where are you going?

To see if anyone in Gotham University's

astrophysics department
has ever heard of Beth...

are we calling her Beth? Alice 2.0?

Well, when you figure
it out, let me know.

Okay. I have seen
pictures like this before

of Beth and me together.

Only it was on a different Earth.

So you think when that galactic dude
put all the Earths in a blender...

somehow she landed on this one,

but how is she Beth and not Alice?

What happened after the crash?

Maybe there was no crash.

Infinite Earths,
infinite variables I bet.

A butterfly flaps its wings.

No Cartwright, no Mouse, no Alice.

She was spared of all that.

Still, I mean, this world has got to be

a very scary place for her.

You know, one second,
she's on her Earth,

the next she's slingshot to this one,

where nobody knows her.

Yeah, and the only person
who does attacks her,

her own twin sister.

Happy birthday!

- I got to find her.
- Yeah.

Where do you think she is?

Where we'd always go on our birthday.

Beth, Beth, I'm sorry!

I'm really, really, sorry.

You gonna attack me again, psycho?

No, no. I... it's a long story,

but I didn't recognize you then,

but I do now.

Well, you are the only one.

Nobody else even knows who I am.

I feel like I'm going crazy.

What's happening?

My wish came true.

I understand you have a request.

Oh, I have a lot of requests,

but since I highly doubt that
you'll grant me my freedom

or my butterfly knife,

I'll settle for my book.

Your book?

Uh, yes. My copy of
"Alice in wonderland".

I imagine it's around here somewhere,

plundered by your Crows when
they raided my little hideaway.

It did bring me so much comfort

the last time I was locked in a cell.

Unless you're willing
to admit to framing

my boss for the murder of his wife,

I'm not interested in your comfort.

Well, that is no way to treat
someone on their birthday.

I wouldn't hold out hope
for me throwing you a party.

That's okay. One's already
being planned.

What's that supposed to mean?

Well, I wouldn't want
to ruin the surprise.

You see, Kate always hated surprises,

but me...

I love them.

Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

Hi. You have something I want,

and I have something
that you'll want back...

two things, in fact.

Say hello to Steven,
Commissioner Forbes's son,

and Bryan, Mayor Akins' heir apparent.

I'll give you till 9 p.m.
to release Alice.

If you don't, I'll snuff out Gotham's

best and brightest.

So literally no one
knows me on this Earth?

On the upside, I guess none
of my exes know me here either.

You're taking this whole
death of the multiverse thing

a lot better than I thought.

I do have a master's
degree in astrophysics,

so the whole concept
of multiple universes

isn't that bizarre.

Here's to making up lost time.

Mmm. I have to ask.

What the hell do all your tattoos mean?

So you're telling me
that the parallel Kate,

uh, did not have tattoos?

Are you kidding? Commander
Kane would have disowned you.

So my dad was still the head
of The Crows on your Earth?

Yeah, and technically, he was our dad.

- God, it's so weird.
- I know,

but you know what's really weird

despite your tats

and the fact that
this used to be my bank

is that it feels like
I'm back on my Earth

and it's just a normal day

just chatting to my sister,

and not to be a total creep,

but...

you still just feel like the best
friend I've had my whole life.

We were best friends.

Yeah. Ever since you
pulled me from the car,

- I've always...
- Wait. What car?

Right. Um...

When we were 13 driving
back from our bat mitzvah,

our car went off a bridge.

So there was a crash.

Yeah. It's how Mom died.

Mom, wake up! No, Mom!

But you... you climbed
back into the car and...

Kate, where are you going?

Wait!

And you pulled me out...

- Beth!
- Kate!

Grab my hand! Come out!

You saved me.

Beth! No! Beth!

And ever since then,
you've been my hero.

What is it?

You near a TV?

Gotham is on high alert

in the wake of the
Wonderland Gang committing

what could be their
most brazen crime to date

with the kidnapping of
the sons of two of Gotham's

highest officials.

Despite the unfolding hostage situation

involving Commissioner Forbes's own son,

the GCPD has not turned
on the Bat-signal.

Commissioner Forbes, does your refusal

to turn on the Bat-signal
have anything to do

with Batwoman coming out as a lesbian?

My wife and I are incredibly concerned

for the safety of our son
and that of Bryan Akins.

Let's not get distracted
by politics. Thank you.

Okay. If they're not gonna
take Batwoman's help,

they're sure as hell gonna need ours.

Oh. So now you come bearing gifts?

It is your birthday.

♪ I know what you're doing ♪

But the question is do you?

I'm granting your request.

I ran it through X-ray, thermal imaging,

even an ion mobility spectrometer.

Turns out it's just a book.

Oh, no.

It's so much more than that.

Yeah? So what makes it so special?

It set me free

from that house of horrors.

Hold still.

Johnny, if you don't keep still,

the adhesive won't set.

It's all wrong.

Seams. It's hideous.

You look like a quilt!

Turns out we were both trapped

in that awful place.

I was in that house.

Can't imagine what years in that place

must have been like.

But you do know...

what it's like to feel trapped...

don't you, Sophie?

I imagine you felt that
way your entire life.

It's unbearable when the only thing

you dream about is being...

out. Ha ha ha!

Prep the suit. I'm coming in.

How are we doing on the
location of the hostages?

I'm working on it,
but GCPD's got nothing,

which is not a total surprise

because they don't have enough
sense to turn on the Bat-signal.

Haven't you heard? I'm too political.

So they'd rather avoid
a political hot potato

than have Batwoman save
the kid of one of their own?

That's crazy.

Welcome to the world we live in.

I'm gonna save them anyway.

Sounds like something Bruce would say.

Yeah. Well, he'd probably
actually do it, too.

Okay. What is it?

I could have saved her, Luke.

Everybody told me that
if I went back in that car

to get Beth that I
would have been killed.

That's not true.

You want to hear the truth?

You got Beth back.

She doesn't need saving,

but right now, there are some
pretty high-profile hostages who do.

On my way.

According to Mouse's deadline,

you've got two hours
to find these hostages.

Copy.

West Harlow's clear.
Head down Sanders Avenue.

Thanks.

Kate, Batcave to Kate. Can you hear me?

Kate, say something!

Kate! Kate, hey!

You guys okay?

Did you enjoy your nap?

I thought it best to intercept you

before you made your wardrobe change.

You know, you are much more docile

without your evening wear.

How are they treating you?

Well, I'm chained to
a table on my birthday,

so I don't think they value the lives

of the hostages you've taken.

Well, I may have someone
that they might care

a bit more about.

Sophie.

- Kate?!
- Hi, sis.

Are you hurt? Are you okay?

No worse than survival training.

You remember that, don't you,

how we never would have made it through

- without each other?
- Yeah.

Then I need you to listen to me.

Let Alice go. Let Alice go.

Do you understand?

I understand.

Good because time's running out,

and my next call will be to tell you

where to find Kate's body.

Hey, Luke. Um... right.

You don't know me.

But you know me?

Yeah. You work for my cousin Bruce.

You're Lucius Fox's son.

Uh, yeah.

Um, I'm just looking for Kate.

She's been kidnapped.

Sorry. There's no easy
way for me to get that out,

but yeah.

Um... kidnapped, as in taken?

By whom?

There's no easy way for
me to get this out either,

but by... you.

- Yeah. That's not happening.
- What?

Did you hear Kate practically
begging for her life?

In survival training, Kate and I learned

to fool our captors by sending
coded messages in the open.

Repeat a message twice,
it meant do the opposite.

She was saying, "Don't let Alice go".

Hmm. Clever and sweet.

You two have your own
little language. Ha ha!

Let me tell you a secret.

Mouse and I had one, too. Heh.

See, we needed a way to make sure

the caterpillar didn't figure out

what we were up to.

Are there any lions
or tigers about here?

It's only the Red King snoring.

That was the little code
that the coast was clear

and we were safe.

You made Chessy a sweater.

I cut up one of my blankets.

He looks so... so fancy.

Johnny, get upstairs. Time for chores.

What was that?

No, no.

You know these creatures
carry all manner of diseases.

Please, Daddy. No. It's my fault.

- I brought him down here.
- Please don't hurt him.

Johnny can put him
back where he found him.

Please no.

I guess you could say

he made the Cheshire Cat...

disappear.

That's awful.

Tell me...

how awful...

it will be when you lose

the thing...

you love so dearly.

If Kate's been kidnapped,

shouldn't we, um, call my dad?

He'll know what to do.
He's, like, special forces.

- He's in jail.
- What?

For killing your stepmother,
but he didn't do it.

Alice did.

Okay. Um, dumb question.

Do police exist on this Earth?

Yes, but honestly, the Wonderland Gang

is always a few steps ahead,

but fortunately, I got a
little something the cops don't,

and that is a GPS on Kate's bike.

Uh, the signal's weak.

The transmitter must
have gotten damaged.

Uh, I just got to find
a way to boost it enough

to get a lock on the location.

- That's...
- Then we send in the cavalry.

No. No. They'll be ready for that,

and that'll just get Kate
and the others killed.

This Mouse guy is demanding Alice, yeah?

Well, what if we give her to him?

No. No. Sorry. That's...
that's not gonna happen, okay?

That's insane, and Kate
would never let you.

Kate saved my life in my world.

I'm gonna save her life in this one.

Batwoman's gonna save us, right?

Not sure I'd count on that.

Yeah, because my idiot dad isn't
gonna turn on the Bat-signal.

Dude, it's 2020.

Nobody cares about gay-straight anymore.

"'Oh, my ears and whiskers,

how late it's getting'."

Look. Alice...

I'm gonna be honest with you.

- Hmm.
- My heart breaks

for that little girl who
was trapped in that cell,

for everything that man did to her,

and I know somewhere deep down

that little girl is
still fighting to get out.

Kate used to think that, too,

but just like that little kitten,

Beth never made it out of the basement.

Did you make this?

Did you make this?

Answer me!

My dad will kill you.

Oh, my dear.

Your father has already
forgotten about you.

You've been replaced.

Now...

I want you to tell me

did you make this?

Yes, I did. I'm sorry.

Don't be sorry, my dear.

This is exactly

the kind of delicate
craftsmanship that Johnny needs.

Now... I want you

to use these nimble, little fingers

to do exactly...

what you did with this sweater...

with these.

That was the day I learned to make faces

out of human skin.

First were the eyebrows...

or was it the lips?

I don't remember.

Perhaps my thoughts were so preoccupied

with the horrid realization

that no one was coming to rescue me.

So she's basically got two go-to moves

in her repertoire of crazy.

Either say something terrible

in a really sweet voice,

or you say something sweet

but make it sound like it's

the scariest thing in the world.

She sounds lovely.

Yeah, and if you really
get into some trouble,

just... throw out a random quote

from "Alice in wonderland".

"Curiouser and curiouser"

or... "Off with her"...

- What? Do I look that bad?
- No, no.

You... you look perfect.

Then what is it?

Just... the last time

I looked into those eyes,

my mom was dying in my arms, poisoned

by Alice...

so it's just hard not to...

Hate me?

I don't blame you.

Alice is...

me, and...

I'm her

at least in some ways, I guess.

Which is why I can't
help but feel responsible

for what happened to your mom,

and I am so, so sorry.

You don't have to be.

You are nothing like that bitch.

Ha!

Hey. Uh, I got a lock.
I know where Kate is.

A scrapyard outside of town.

Time's almost up!

No, no, no, no. This is not happening.

No. I can't die, I can't die.

"The dormouse shook its head impatiently

and said without opening its eyes,

'Of course, of course.

Just what I was going
to remark myself'."

They let you go?

You played your part
well, my little Mouse.

You made them fear you,
and they set me free.

And alas, a deal's a deal,

and now we must do the same for them.

Why does she get to live?

She was perfectly happy
living her life without you.

Now it's time for you to live yours

without her.

Were you followed?

No. Of course not.

Are there any lions
or tigers about here?

What are you talking about?

Are there any lions
or tigers about here?

Who are you?

No!

Let me out! Help!

This is your last chance.

You can still be the
person you once were.

If you say your wish out loud,

it will never come true.

Your father has already
forgotten about you.

I want you to use these
nimble, little fingers...

Thank you...

For helping me look normal.

I'm sorry about the book,

but I got some of my dad's fishing line.

It's really strong.

We can fix it, Beth.

_

I'm gonna call you my little Mouse...

and you can call me Alice.

Shall we have a tea party?

The book was my escape.

That's how you dealt
with all that trauma,

by creating an entirely
different reality

and becoming someone else.

Isn't that what you did, Agent Moore?

Escaping your prison by
becoming someone else,

lying to yourself and everybody else

about who you really are,

retreating into the arms of that...

yummy boy scout?

Get her out of here.

Maybe Arkham will have
better luck bringing out

who you really are, Beth.

This is who I really am. Ha ha ha!

Drop it.

My dear, sweet, little birdie.

I may be free of my cage,

but you're still trapped in yours,

and you always will be

because it's one of your own making...

and that...

is a hell more unbearable...

than...

Let me out! Let me out!

- Get me out!
- Let me out! Kate!

Kate, help!

- Please help!
- Let me out!

- Err!
- Get me out of here!

Come on, please! Get me out!

Hurry up! Please! Please help!

Help! Help!

Get me out, please!

Help me!

Please, please get me out.
Please, please, please, please.

Someone, help! Please! Help me!

Kate!

Come on! Come on! Hurry! Come on!

Get back, get back, get back!

Evening, Gotham. Notice
how I didn't say, "Good evening"?

That's because Alice
is back on the streets,

and while Gotham's golden boys

may be safe and snug
in their beddy-byes,

I'll be sleeping with
a Louisville slugger

under the bed tonight

because with Batwoman on
the GCPD's do-not-call list,

it's the only Bat that's
going to protect me.

Shut down Brown and Loeb Bridge.

Leave Trigate open.
Give her one way out.

Search every vehicle top to bottom.

If she tries it, we'll stop her there.

What's the status on Mouse?

Just got out of surgery, in ICU.

I want a 6-person team
on him round the clock.

Kate, how are you?

I came to ask you the same thing.

Rattled, embarrassed,
pissed. Mostly pissed.

Well, I'm just glad
you remembered our code.

Of course I did. I remember everything.

For example, happy birthday.

- Heh.
- Did you get anything good

besides kidnapped?

I... I did actually.

And now with the city gripped by fear

with reports of Alice's bloody escape...

What's going on at the GCPD?

Protesters have taken to the steps

of the GCPD demanding

that they turn on the Bat-signal.

Sometimes, this city surprises you.

Turn on the light, turn on the light...

Any idea where she could be?

I don't know,

and I'm sorry, Commander.

I should have listened
to you, and now...

You didn't kill those agents.

Alice did.

Yeah, but because of
me, now she's escaped.

That's how we're gonna stop her.

If anything happened to Alice

when she was in Crows custody,

we'd have to answer for it,

but she's a fugitive now.

We can put a bullet in her,

and no one would bat an eye.

It's time we do exactly that.

Surprise!

I had nothing to do with this.

Yeah, yeah. She told me
that you would hate this.

She would be right. Twin intuition.

Happy birthday, Beth.

Happy birthday.

Whoo! Okay.

Mmm. Your bar needs bigger glasses.

You know, I'll be honest.

I never really understood
why you were so hell-bent

on redeeming that psychopath Alice,

but now that I've met
Beth, I totally get it.

- I see what you lost.
- Yeah.

To miracles.

Actually, I don't think
that that's what it is.

This could just be my
little friend talking here,

but I read your sister's thesis

on extra astrogalactic stuffy stuff.

I think Beth's being here is
some kind of cosmic anomaly.

Hear me out.

What if there are multiple universes,

kind of like a bunch of
different planet Earths,

and then they all kind
of pow, pow, pow, pow,

collapsed into one,

only there were some parts leftover?

Kind of like after you've
built an Ikea bookshelf

and Beth is just one of the parts

that made it into the box somehow.

Yeah. You're right. It's crazy. Ha!

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you... ♪

Okay. Uh, make a wish.

Well, all I ever wanted
was a second chance,

and here you are, so...

Ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

Hey. What's happening?

- Aah!
- Beth, what's happening?

- What is it?
- Aah!

Aah! Ohh! Ow!