Barney Miller (1975–1982): Season 8, Episode 15 - Obituary - full transcript

OKAY, MR. DELUCA.

YOU, UH, WANT TO JUST TELL
ME EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED?

SURE.

UNLESS I'M KEEPING
YOU FROM SOMETHING.

UH, IT'S OKAY.

THANK YOU.

WELL, LET'S SEE.

I WAS ON MY WAY

TO THE JEWISH HOME AND
HOSPITAL FOR THE AGED.

I ALWAYS GO THERE ON WEDNESDAYS.

OH?



I'M A VOLUNTEER.

I READ POETRY TO
THE OLD AND THE ILL.

THAT'S NICE.

YEAH.

WELL, ANYWAY,

I WAS JUST ABOUT
READY TO CATCH MY BUS

WHEN I SAW THIS WOMAN

LYING FACEDOWN ON THE SIDEWALK.

MM-HMM.

SO I RUN OVER THERE

JUST AS FAST AS MY WOODEN
LEG WOULD CARRY ME.

I KNELT DOWN BESIDE HER,

AND I ASKED HER IF THERE
WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO.

AND?



AND SHE SAYS, "SURE."

THEN SHE GRABS ME IN A HEADLOCK,

STARTS BITING MY EAR.

THE NEXT THING I KNOW,

HER AND THESE TWO BIG GUYS
ARE GOING THROUGH MY POCKETS.

THEY KICKED ME IN THE
RIBS A COUPLE OF TIMES

AND RAN AWAY.

THEY EVEN BROKE
MY READING GLASSES.

GOD, I'M REALLY SORRY.

OH, NO, NO, THAT'S OKAY.

I MEAN, BETTER ME

THAN SOMEBODY LESS
FORTUNATE, YOU KNOW?

RIGHT.

LOOK, WHY DON'T
YOU JUST SIT THERE

AND, UM, YOU KNOW,

TRY AND MAKE
YOURSELF COMFORTABLE?

I'LL GET YOU A CUP OF COFFEE.

I DON'T WANT TO PUT YOU OUT.

THAT'S OKAY. I DON'T MIND.

BUT I'M BEING A BOTHER.

IT'S OKAY. LOOK, I WANT A CUP.

I'LL GET IT.

HEY, I'LL GET IT.

- IT'S ALL THE WAY...
- I'LL MANAGE.

WELL, I... YEAH, IT'S
A BIT SUSPICIOUS

WHEN A WHOLE FAMILY
JUST DISAPPEARS LIKE THAT,

BUT, UH...

UM... LADY, LOOK,

THERE'S NOTHING
WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.

YEAH, SURE.

YES, WE'LL KEEP AN
EYE OUT FOR THEM.

RIGHT. BYE.

SOMEONE MISSING?

THE WALTONS.

OH.

SOMEBODY WANTED TO KNOW
WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM.

I THINK THE, UH,

I THINK THE MOTHER'S
A NURSE NOW.

I'LL HAVE TO CHECK IT OUT.

MARGINAL MAIL CALL.

JUST A BUNCH OF JUNK.

APPRECIATE IT.

THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.

HERE YOU GO, SERGEANT.

THANK YOU, CARL.

I READ THE BOOK.

- GOOD MORNING, LEVITT.
- MORNING, SIR.

BARNEY, ALARM JUST WENT OFF.

OFFICE BUILDING ON 5th.

OH, SIR, I'M AVAILABLE.

TAKE WOJO.

MAY I HELP YOU?

YES, I'M PERLITA AVILAR...

FROM THE PHILIPPINES.

OKAY.

THEY TOLD ME DOWNSTAIRS THAT...

FRANK MIGHT BE UP HERE.

FRANK WHO?

FRANK LUGER.

UH, WHAT DO YOU
WANT TO SEE HIM FOR?

WE'RE SUPPOSED TO GET MARRIED.

MY GOD.

DIDN'T HE, UH...

DIDN'T HE KNOW SHE WAS COMING?

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, HE WENT THROUGH
THAT, UH, MAIL-ORDER BRIDE THING,

WHAT, SIX MONTHS AGO.

I THOUGHT HE FORGOT
ABOUT THE WHOLE THING.

DID YOU?

WELL, I MEAN, WE, UH...

WE WENT THROUGH THE
MAGAZINES TOGETHER.

I PICKED HER OUT, AMONG OTHERS.

I WROTE ALL THE LETTERS.

I CAN'T IMAGINE HE WOULD
MAKE A DECISION LIKE THIS

WITHOUT CHECKING WITH ME.

BUT, BARNEY, HE
DIDN'T GET HER FOR YOU.

IT'S FREE NOW.

I STRAIGHTENED IT A LITTLE.

WELL, THAT REALLY
WASN'T NECESSARY.

OH?

I, UH, LEFT A MESSAGE
WITH THE INSPECTOR.

FRANK.

HE, UH, HE SHOULD
BE HERE MOMENTARILY.

THANK YOU.

HE WAS EXPECTING YOU, WASN'T HE?

I THINK SO.

I'M TELLING YOU, I
DIDN'T STEAL NOTHING.

DOUBLE NEGATIVE?

OKAY, I'M COLLOQUIAL. SO SUE ME.

WHAT, UH, WHAT HAVE WE GOT HERE?

THIS IS VINCENT BRYSOM.

AND YOU ARE?

WHAT HAPPENED?

DID LUGER SHOW UP YET?

WHAT HAPPENED?

UH, WELL, UH,

WE, UH, WE GOT TO
THAT BUILDING THERE.

WE CAUGHT VINNY HERE
SNEAKING OUT THE BACK,

TRYING TO CART OFF
A VIDEO RECORDER,

TWO ELECTRIC TYPEWRITERS,

AND THIS BUST OF EINSTEIN.

YEAH, HE'S A SNOB LIKE
ALL THE REST OF THEM.

ALL THE REST OF WHOM?

MENSANS.

MENSANS?

YEAH, WE CAUGHT VINNY
RANSACKING THE MENSA OFFICE.

MENSA... OH, THAT'S, UH...

IT'S BASICALLY AN ORGANIZATION

THAT CATERS TO PEOPLE
WITH AN I.Q. IN THE TOP 2%.

RIGHT.

SORT OF A SOCIAL
CLUB FOR GENIUSES.

WHAT'S THE MATTER,

YOU GOT SOMETHING
AGAINST SMART PEOPLE?

I'M A MEMBER.

YEAH, I BET.

NO, HE IS, BARN.

HUH?

HE HAD THIS ON HIM.

THIS SAYS HE'S A MEMBER
IN GOOD STANDING.

UNTIL NOW.

YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

NO.

NO, I WAS MAKING A POINT.

SEE, I JOINED MENSA

'CAUSE I THOUGHT I COULD
FIND PEOPLE LIKE ME THERE,

PEOPLE I COULD TALK TO.

AND?

THEY TOLD ME TO WISE UP.

THAT'S FUNNY.

SURE, MAKE JOKES.

LOOK, SIMPLE GUYS LIKE
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND

HOW FRUSTRATING IT IS

TO ZIP THROUGH THE
SUNDAY CROSSWORD

LIKE IT WAS NOTHING.

TO ALWAYS KNOW HOW THE
MOVIE'S GONNA TURN OUT.

I CAN'T HAVE A SIMPLE
CONVERSATION WITH SOMEBODY.

I JUST GET BORED.

WOJO, TAKE HIS STATEMENT.

OKAY, SMART GUY, SIT DOWN.

SO, WHAT DID YOU DO,

TEACH YOURSELF
ENGLISH ON THE PLANE?

NO, WE WERE TAUGHT
ENGLISH IN THE SCHOOL.

AND ALSO, FOR 10 YEARS, I
WORKED OUTSIDE OF MANILA

AT CLARK AIR FORCE BASE.

BOMBARDIER?

NO. I WORKED IN THE SNACK BAR,

AS A CASHIER. UH-HUH.

SEE, THAT'S SURPRISING.

A NICE GIRL LIKE YOU.

HOW COME YOU DIDN'T
MARRY A YOUNG FLYBOY?

OH.

I HAD MANY PROPOSALS.

BUT... MARRIAGE WAS
NEVER MENTIONED.

OH.

HOW ABOUT THAT
ALI-FRAZIER FIGHT, HUH?

THE THING IS, I WAS HAPPY
BACK IN GRADE SCHOOL...

YOU KNOW, HANGING
OUT WITH THE GUYS,

CUTTING ASSEMBLY,
SMOKING IN THE BOYS' ROOM.

I HAD A BALL.

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT.

THEN THEY GO AND THEY
GIVE ME THIS STUPID TEST.

NEXT THING I KNOW, I'M
A JUNIOR AT COLUMBIA,

MATHEMATICS.

I WAS 12.

TOUGH BREAK.

YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT.

NO MORE FRIENDS.

STRANGERS POINTING
AT ME IN THE CAFETERIA.

SORORITY GIRLS
PATTING ME ON THE HEAD.

THE FREAK.

INSIDE. YEAH, RIGHT.

SO ANYWAY, I'M OFF FOR
MY DOCTORATE, RIGHT?

I'M MAYBE HALFWAY THROUGH A
THESIS IN THEORETICAL TELEMETRY.

I SAID, TO HELL WITH THIS.

I PACKED MY BAGS,
GOT ON MY BICYCLE,

KNOCKED OFF A LIQUOR STORE,

AND I NEVER LOOKED BACK.

YOU KNOW IT TOOK ME
THREE YEARS TO PASS

THE STUPID SERGEANT'S EXAM?

REALLY?

WOW.

THAT'S GREAT.

HOLD IT, MABEL.

DON'T SET THE TABLE.

FRANKIE LUGER'S AT THE PLATE.

PYOW!

AND WE'RE GOING
INTO EXTRA INNINGS.

WELL, INSPECTOR...

YOU, UH, READY
TO HIT A HOME RUN?

HOW'S IT GOING, HAR?

DIET, BARN, WO.

Wojo: INSPECTOR.

ALOHA, WAHINE.

FRANK?

IT'S VERY NICE TO
MEET YOU, FRANK.

LIKEWISE, I'M SURE.

YOUR OFFICE, BARN?

I SHALL RETURN.

- WELL, BARNEY?
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "WELL"?

WELL, I GOT YOUR MESSAGE.
YOU WANTED TO SEE ME.

YES, ABOUT MISS
AVILAR OUT THERE.

WHO?

OH, SWEET LEILANI.

OH, WHAT DID SHE HAVE
TO SAY FOR HERSELF?

SHE IN TOWN FOR THE BOAT SHOW?

YOU DID SEND FOR HER.

NOT IN THE... IN THE
CLASSIC SENSE, BARNEY.

I SENT HER ONE LOUSY POSTCARD...

PICTURE OF THE
CHRYSLER BUILDING.

SCRIBBLED A LITTLE NOTE ON IT.

"THANKS FOR YOUR LETTERS.
THE WEATHER HERE'S FINE.

"IF YOU EVER GET IN THIS NECK
OF THE WOODS, LOOK ME UP.

MAYBE WE'LL GET
MARRIED. REGARDS, FRANK."

THAT'S ALL THERE WAS TO IT.

THAT'S ALL?

WELL, I DID APPLY

FOR ONE OF THEM SWEETHEART
VISA PERMITS, YOU KNOW,

WHATEVER THEY CALL THEM, BARNEY.

AND THEN IN A WEAK MOMENT

I MAY HAVE SIGNED SOME
GOBBLEDYGOOK IMMIGRATION PAPERS

THAT THEY STUCK UNDER MY
NOSE AS I'M WALKING OUT THE DOOR.

BUT I FIGURED ALL
THAT JUNK, BARNEY,

IT'D PROBABLY GET
LOST ON A JUNK.

YOU DID SEND FOR HER.

I WAS ONLY BEING POLITE, BARN.

YOU GOT A HELL OF
A WAY OF SHOWING IT.

THAT WOMAN JUST
TRAVELED 10,000 MILES

ON THE BASIS OF YOUR PROPOSAL.

SHE'S BEEN SITTING OUT
THERE IN THAT SQUAD ROOM,

STUCK ALL MORNING,
WAITING TO SEE YOU.

ALL RIGHT.

YOU'RE STARTING
TO GET COLD FEET?

FINE. WE CAN DEAL WITH THAT.

BUT YOU CANNOT AVOID
THE ISSUE BY HIDING IN HERE.

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, BARN.

I'LL BE DOWNSTAIRS.

INSPECTOR...

I DON'T WANT TO GET MIXED UP
IN THESE DOMESTIC SQUABBLES.

YOU'LL GET RID OF HER, BARNEY.

THANKS.

UH, HEY, GOT TO RUN.

CAPTAIN?

UH, MISS AVILAR.

IS SOMETHING WRONG?

NO. NO, NO, NO.

UH, THE INSPECTOR JUST
REMEMBERED SOMETHING

HE HAD TO DO DOWNSTAIRS.

POLICE MATTER.

OH, I SEE.

IS HE COMING BACK?

OF COURSE.

OF COURSE. WHY SHOULDN'T HE?

WELL, PERHAPS I SHOULD LEAVE.

NO. NO, NO, NO.

PLEASE.

I PROMISE YOU HE'LL
BE BACK MOMENTARILY.

HE WILL? MAYBE I'LL LEAVE.

WHY DON'T YOU DO WHAT YOU CAN

TO MAKE MISS AVILAR
FEEL COMFORTABLE?

SOME COFFEE, TEA, A MAGAZINE?

I FEEL LIKE I'M
STILL ON THE PLANE.

SMOKING, NON-SMOKING?

I'LL GET YOU SOME TEA.

THANK YOU.

EXCUSE ME.

I'M NORMAN. I HAVE
17 FOSTER-CHILDREN.

HEY!

YEAH, CAN I HELP YOU?

I'M WILLIAM DIETZ... MENSA.

STANLEY WOJCIEHOWICZ... MORON.

AT ANY RATE, THEY
INFORMED ME DOWNSTAIRS

THAT YOU'RE HOLDING
OUR MR. BRYSOM HERE.

YEAH, THAT'S HIM OVER
THERE IN THE CAGE.

OH, MY.

THE POOR FELLOW LOOKS
LIKE HE'S ON EXHIBIT.

WELL, IT'S FREE.

HELLO, VINCENT.

BALDY.

YES.

ANYWAY, I WAS
RELAXING AT MY DESK,

THUMBING THROUGH
"THE ROSETTA STONE"

WHEN I HEARD THE DISTURBING NEWS

THAT YOU HAD PILLAGED
OUR LITTLE CLUB

AND MADE OFF WITH SOME
RATHER VALUABLE PROPERTY.

YEAH. SO?

MR. DIETZ, I'M CAPTAIN MILLER.

CAPTAIN, CAPTAIN,

I MUST SAY THAT I
AM QUITE DISPLEASED

WITH YOUR TREATMENT
OF MR. BRYSOM HERE.

UH, I ASSUME YOU'RE AWARE
THAT MR. BRYSOM WAS ARRESTED

FOR BURGLARIZING THE
OFFICES OF YOUR ORGANIZATION.

YES, YES, YES.

IF I COULD JUST HAVE A
WORD WITH MR. BRYSOM...

IN PRIVATE.

CERTAINLY.

THANK YOU.

ANYWAY, VINCENT,

THE THING I DON'T
QUITE UNDERSTAND,

SO TO SPEAK,

IS WHY YOU CHOSE
TO STEAL FROM US.

WHY NOT?

YES, BUT... WE'RE YOUR OWN KIND.

I MUST SAY THAT I FEEL
A LITTLE BIT BETRAYED.

DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL.
I STEAL FROM EVERYBODY.

VINCENT, WE ARE
HARDLY EVERYBODY.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

LISTEN. I MEAN... NO, LISTEN.

THE SOLE PURPOSE OF MENSA

IS TO BRING PEOPLE
LIKE US TOGETHER

AS INTELLECTUAL EQUALS...

A SELECT GROUP OF MINDS

MELDED INTO A
MAGNIFICENT CEREBRAL MASS

WHICH CAN HURTLE ITS WAY

ACROSS THE HORIZON OF KNOWLEDGE

UP TO THE VERY
EDGE OF ESOTERICA.

I JUST WANTED TO
TALK ABOUT BROADS.

EXCUSE ME. WOULD
YOU LIKE A TOOTSIE ROLL?

NO. THANK YOU.

I ALWAYS KEEP A HANDFUL
IN MY POCKET, YOU KNOW?

FOR THE KIDS WHO
COME INTO MY SHOP?

YEAH?

I FIX TOYS.

OH, THAT'S NICE.

THANK YOU.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

SO, ANYWAY, UH,

I'VE BEEN NOTICING YOU
SITTING HERE ALL DAY ALONE,

AND I FIGURE MAYBE YOU'RE
FEELING A LITTLE BIT SAD.

I MEAN, WHAT WITH
COMING ALL THE WAY OVER

AND NOT KNOWING EXACTLY
WHAT'S GOING ON AND ALL.

WELL, I JUST WANT TO SAY

THAT IF THINGS DON'T WORK
OUT EXACTLY LIKE YOU PLANNED,

AND IF IT ISN'T TOO MUCH
OF AN INCONVENIENCE,

THEN I'LL MARRY YOU.

I'M FLATTERED THAT
YOU OFFERED, NORMAN,

BUT I'M AFRAID I'VE ALREADY
MADE A COMMITMENT TO FRANK.

SURE. I UNDERSTAND.

NO PROBLEM.

BOY!

ANYWAY, VINCENT,

I MUST SAY THAT,
HAVING EVALUATED

THE PEDESTRIAN LIFESTYLE
YOU'VE EMBRACED...

YOU KNOW, SKULKING
DOWN DARK ALLEYWAYS,

CLIMBING OUT OF WINDOWS
WITH YOUR LITTLE SACK,

ALLOWING YOURSELF
TO VICTIMIZE PEOPLE

WHO HARDLY MERIT
YOUR ATTENTION...

WELL, I MUST SAY,

I FIND THE WHOLE NASTY BUSINESS

QUITE DISHEARTENING.

WHO CARES?

I CARE.

I DO, VINCENT. I
WANT TO HELP YOU.

I WANT TO HELP YOU TO
CULTIVATE YOUR POTENTIAL,

TO GROOM YOU FOR ACHIEVEMENT,

TO MOLD YOU INTO SOMEONE
PEOPLE ADMIRE AND RESPECT.

MM-HMM.

LIKE ME.

AFTER ALL, YOU KNOW,

I DID FOUND A BOOMING
INVESTMENT FIRM.

I'M HIGHLY REGARDED
ON THE LECTURE CIRCUIT...

ANTHROPOLOGY.

I HAVE A TOWN HOUSE IN THE CITY.

I HAVE AN ESTATE
IN VERMONT, GENEVA.

I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL,
INTELLIGENT WIFE, RUTH.

RUTH.

YOU'VE HEARD OF HER, THEN?

HMM?

YOU MUST HAVE SEEN HER...

THE BLONDE IN THE MASERATI.

ONE WHO LIKES HER
MEN YOUNG AND DUMB...

CONSTRUCTION
WORKERS, BARTENDERS,

HOCKEY PLAYERS, COPS.

UH, SARGE.

OKAY, SO MAYBE I DON'T
HAVE BULGING BICEPS

OR A SWARTHY COMPLEXION.

MAYBE I DO LACK A
CERTAIN ANIMAL MAGNETISM

OR HANDFUL UPON
HANDFUL OF DARK, WAVY HAIR.

MR. DIETZ.

WELL, GRASS DOESN'T GROW
ON A BUSY STREET, BUSTER.

SORRY.

DO YOU WANT TO STEP OVER HERE?

WE'LL SIGN A COMPLAINT.

ACTUALLY...

ACTUALLY, I THINK THAT
WE ARE BETTER EQUIPPED

TO DEAL WITH MR. BRYSOM
THAN THE PENAL SYSTEM

AS IT IS CURRENTLY CONSTITUTED.

YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE
NOT GONNA PRESS CHARGES?

NO.

PROVIDING THAT MR. BRYSOM

AGREES TO RETURN
WITH ME TO MENSA

AND ATTEND A FEW OF MY
PERSONALITY WORKSHOPS.

I'LL PASS.

I GET THAT FROM RUTH.

VINCENT.

VINCENT, ARE YOU GONNA ALLOW ME

TO WALK RIGHT OUT OF HERE

AND TO LEAVE YOU IN
THE CUSTODY OF THESE...

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE.

YEAH, I DO.

I'D RATHER BE HERE.

THANK YOU.

FINE.

MR. DIETZ,

WOULD YOU MIND HAVING A
SEAT AT MY DESK FOR A MINUTE?

YOU GOT A CHANCE TO WALK
OUT OF HERE A FREE MAN.

YOU'RE DOING A STUPID THING.

WELL, IT'S A START.

I'M BACK.

THANKS, TOOTS.

I SEE YOU'RE STILL HERE, HUH?

THERE WAS NOWHERE ELSE TO GO.

OH, YEAH. RIGHT.

INSPECTOR.

BARNEY.

DID YOU WANT TO SEE ME?

NO.

HER.

OH.

GENTLEMEN, IT'S
ABOUT CHECK-OUT TIME.

YEAH, I'M OUT OF HERE.

WE WERE JUST LEAVING.

YEP.

COME ON, VINNY.

ONE SEC. ONE SEC.

COME ON.

COULDN'T HELP IT.

UM, I GOT TO... RUN.

Luger: GO ON.

GOOD LUCK.

YOU CERTAINLY HAVE A
WAY WITH PEOPLE, FRANK.

OH, THANK YOU.

YOU KNOW,

I WAS BEGINNING TO THINK
YOU WEREN'T COMING BACK.

I ALMOST LEFT.

I GUESS I SAVED YOU A TRIP, HUH?

WELL, NO, ACTUALLY,
I GOT TO THINKING,

AND I FIGURED THAT...

UH, THAT I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY

FOR MY RUDE BEHAVIOR
BEFORE AND ALL.

THAT ISN'T REALLY NECESSARY.

OH, NO?

I MEAN, IF YOU FIND
ME UNATTRACTIVE,

IF I'M JUST NOT WHAT YOU'RE
LOOKING FOR IN A WIFE,

THEN JUST TELL ME.

OH, NO.

I'LL UNDERSTAND.

YOU LOOK FINE.

REALLY?

YEAH.

YEAH, A LITTLE YOUNG, MAYBE.

YOU'RE NOT TOO TALL.

BUT... YOU'RE HEALTHIER
THAN I HAD PLANNED.

I SENT YOU MY PHOTOGRAPH.

OH, YES, BUT I KIND OF...

I FIGURED THAT WAS
A PICTURE OF, MAYBE,

YOUR GREAT-GRANDDAUGHTER
OR MRS. MARCUS

OR ONE OF THE LOCAL
BANANA QUEENS OR SOMEBODY.

THAT'S A REALLY NICE
THING TO SAY, FRANK.

YES. YES, IT IS.

OH, LOOK, BUT DON'T
GO GETTING ANY IDEAS

ABOUT PEOPLE THROWING
THE RICE AND OLD SHOES YET.

I WOULDN'T DO
THAT IF I WERE YOU.

OH?

NO.

THE LAST 30, 40 YEARS,

I'VE BEEN PRETTY MUCH ON MY OWN.

I GO AND COME WHEN
I PLEASE, YOU KNOW,

IN AND OUT OF MY LITTLE
ONE-ROOM APARTMENT,

QUIET DINNERS AT
THE HORN & HARDART,

TAKE IN A MOVIE NOW AND THEN...

AND AN OCCASIONAL
BURLESQUE SHOW,

IF YOU'LL PARDON THE EXPRESSION.

OH, IT'S PRETTY HARD

TO GIVE UP ALL THAT GOOD STUFF.

THEN... WHY DID YOU SEND FOR ME?

WELL, BECAUSE I'M LONELY.

ME TOO.

YOU TOO?

OKAY. NOW WHAT?

I'M A LITTLE HUNGRY.

HUNGRY?

WELL, THAT'S NO
PROBLEM, I, UH...

THERE'S A VENDING MACHINE
DOWNSTAIRS IN THE LOCKER ROOM.

OH, NO, I'M JUST KIDDING.

HUH? WHAT DO YOU SAY?

WE'LL GO OUT, FIND
A NICE LITTLE SPOT,

PUT ON A FEED BAG, OKAY?

OKAY.

OKAY. I'LL GET YOUR BAG.

OH, UH, THERE'S
JUST ONE OTHER THING

I THINK I OUGHT TO MENTION
BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER.

WE'LL GO OUT AND
HAVE A NICE DINNER.

BUT AFTER THAT, I CAN'T
PROMISE ANY DANCING.

KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

OKAY.

OKAY.

AFTER YOU, MISS... PERLITA.

PERLITA.

PERLITA LUGER.

EVERYTHING WORK OUT?