Barney Miller (1975–1982): Season 4, Episode 21 - Evaluation - full transcript

- ANY CALLS?
- NO.

AAH!

SOUNDED LIKE ROZ.

IT WAS.

DID YOU KNOW SHE WAS IN THERE?

NO.

DID YOU?

WHAT KIND OF QUESTION
IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE?

HMM, RHETORICALLY HUMOROUS?

GOOD MORNING.

- CAPTAIN.
- BARN.



WE SEEM TO HAVE A
SKELETON CREW TODAY, HUH?

HARRIS CALLED IN.

HE RAN INTO A DISTURBANCE
ON HIS WAY TO WORK.

HE'S GONNA BRING SOMEBODY IN.

ANYBODY SEEN ROZ?

WOJO HAS.

WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?

SHE'S IN THE BATHROOM.

ALL RIGHT. THAT'S ALL I ASKED.

WOJO?

I JUST WALKED IN ON HER
WHILE SHE WAS IN THERE.

OH, I SEE.

YEAH, SO DID I.

LOOK, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.



IT'S SORT OF
EMBARRASSING, THAT'S ALL.

SURE, I CAN SEE IT
WOULD BE EMBARRASSING.

DON'T TAKE MUCH TO EMBARRASS ME.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST
FORGET ABOUT IT?

GO BACK TO WORK.

IT HAPPENS, IT
HAPPENS, YOU KNOW?

RIGHT.

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING, CAPTAIN.

ALL RIGHT, COME ON. IN WE GO.

I'M TELLING YOU IT
WAS UNAVOIDABLE.

IT WAS A CONFLICT

WITH MY INHERENT RIGHT TO
BECOME SPIRITUALLY ACCEPTABLE.

HEY, HEY, HEY. I
KNOW HOW THAT IS.

OH, GOOD MORNING...
BARNEY. I'M LATE.

GOOD MORNING... HARRIS. I KNOW.

IT WAS UNAVOIDABLE, BARN.

I WAS AT MY BANK THIS
MORNING MAKING A DEPOSIT

WHEN I GOT THIS GUY.

HE, UM... HE TOOK A
SWING AT THE CASHIER.

HE REFUSED TO ACCEPT
MY NEED FOR UNIVERSALITY.

IT WAS SELF-DEFENSE.

I DIDN'T QUITE GET
THAT, MISTER, UH...

GO ON. TELL HIM.

1223.

NO, NO, NO, NO. YOUR NAME.

THAT'S MY NAME.

BARNEY, HE WAS TRYING TO
OPEN A CHECKING ACCOUNT

IN THE NAME OF 1223.

RIGHT.

UM, THEY REFUSED,
AND HE RETALIATED.

RIGHT.

NUMEROLOGY.

HEY, YOU WANT TO HAVE A
SEAT RIGHT OVER THERE, PLEASE?

THAT'S THE STUDY OF THE
OCCULT SIGNIFICANCE OF NUMBERS,

HOW THEY AFFECT YOUR LIFE.

UH, YES, DIETRICH,
WE'RE AWARE OF THAT.

OH, SURE.

IS THAT IT?

YEAH.

10-4.

12th PRECINCT, WOJCIEHOWICZ.

YEAH.

YEAH, OKAY.

UH, BYE.

BARN, UH, DISTURBANCE AT THE
GARDEN OF EARTHLY DELIGHTS.

THAT'S A PAINTING BY BOSCH.

IT'S A PORNO SHOP
ON LEXINGTON AVENUE.

OH, YEAH, THAT'S THE OTHER ONE.

ALL RIGHT, YOU AND, UH...

DIETRICH.

OKAY, THANKS.

BY THE WAY, I'VE
GOT THESE, UH, FORMS

I'M GONNA ASK YOU TO FILL
OUT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

NEW POLICY FROM DEPARTMENT...
PROFICIENCY EVALUATIONS.

WE'RE NOT GONNA RATE
EACH OTHER, ARE WE?

NO, NO, NO, NO,
NO. I DO THE RATING.

THANK GOD.

IT'S JUST ROUTINE... WORK
HABITS, JOB PERFORMANCE.

PBBT!

I WOULDN'T WORRY
ABOUT IT, WOJO. I...

I TRY TO BE AS FAIR AS POSSIBLE.

ANY LUCK ON HIS NAME YET?

NOT A THING, BARN. HE
HAD NO IDENTIFICATION.

ALL HE HAD WAS THIS LIBRARY CARD

WITH HIS NUMBER ON IT.

THEY'RE THE ONLY ONES
WHO HAVE BEEN COOPERATIVE.

- LOOK, MR., UH...
- 1223.

THAT'S IT. NO SURNUMBER.

ALL RIGHT, MR. 1223,

UH, WHAT WERE YOU CALLED
BEFORE YOU WERE 1223?

THAT'S IRRELEVANT.

UH, BARN, I SENT
HIS FINGERPRINTS

THROUGH FOR A CHECK.

MAYBE WE CAN GET
AN I.D. THAT WAY.

ALL RIGHT. ALSO
CHECK HIS ADDRESS.

MAYBE SOMEBODY THERE KNOWS HIM.

WELL, HE SAYS HE LIVES
AT, UH, 322 LEXINGTON, BARN.

THAT'S THE MARQUIS HOTEL.

322. I PICKED IT
FOR THE ADDRESS.

YOU SEE WHAT THE NUMBERS
ADD UP TO, DON'T YOU?

7.

7. THAT'S THE NUMBER OF
BEAUTY, RHYTHM, HARMONY,

COEXISTENCE WITH MY ENVIRONMENT,

COEXISTENCE WITH
THE ENTIRE GALAXY.

AND THERE'S A GREAT
LITTLE COFFEE SHOP.

WELL, JUST STEP
IN HERE, ALL RIGHT?

IRENE, WILL YOU PLEASE
COME ON ALREADY?

I HOPE THIS DOESN'T TAKE LONG.

YOU KNOW, WE REALLY HAVE
TO GET BACK TO THE STORE.

WON'T BE LONG. THERE'S
VIRTUALLY NOTHING WE CAN DO.

OH?

YEAH? WHAT, UH...
WHAT DO WE GOT?

THIS IS MR. AND MRS.
SCHUMAN. THEY'RE THE VICTIMS.

THEY OWN THE GARDEN
OF EARTHLY DELIGHTS.

A MA-AND-PA PORNO SHOP?

HOW REFRESHING.

IT'S CONFUSING.

WHAT, UH... WHAT HAPPENED?

UH, SOMEONE THREW A
BRICK THROUGH THEIR WINDOW.

YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, BUT
THAT'S ONLY THE LATEST THING.

EVER SINCE WE'VE BEEN IN
BUSINESS, NOTHING BUT TROUBLE.

FIRST THERE WERE PHONE
CALLS, THEN THREATENING LETTERS,

AND THEN IT REALLY STARTED...

BROKEN WINDOWS AND SIGNS.

EDDIE, HOW MANY NEON
LIPS DID WE LOSE LAST MONTH?

OH, PLEASE.

I HOPE YOU WON'T MIND MY ASKING
THIS QUESTION, MR. SCHUMAN,

BUT, UH... WHAT'S
A COUPLE LIKE US

DOING RUNNING AN
ADULT BOOKSTORE, RIGHT?

SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

SURVIVAL, SIR.

IF YOU DON'T GO WITH THE
TIMES, YOU DON'T SURVIVE.

WOULD YOU HAVE A SEAT, MA'AM?

OF COURSE. THANK YOU.

YOU KNOW, WE USED TO HAVE
A LOVELY LITTLE GROCERY.

OH, YES, MEATS AND
KOSHER DELICACIES.

AND ALL THE KIDS, REMEMBER?

THEY USED TO COME IN FOR THE
GUMBALLS AND THE CARAMELS.

OH, YEAH.

AND THOSE LONG PAPERS WITH
THE LITTLE CANDY STUCK ON THEM.

WHAT WERE THOSE CALLED?

BUTTONS.

OH, YEAH. I USED TO LOVE THOSE.

THANK YOU, HARRIS.

THEN THE A&P CAME AND OPENED
UP A STORE AT THE END OF THE BLOCK.

DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU ANY MORE?

UH, WOJO, YOU WANT TO
TAKE THEIR STATEMENTS?

SERGEANT WOJCIEHOWICZ WILL
GET THE REST OF THE INFORMATION.

WELL, JUST LAST WEEK,

SOMEBODY SPRAY-PAINTED
THE ENTIRE FRONT OF THE STORE

WITH FILTHY SAYINGS.

REMEMBER, EDDIE, HOW THE
BUSINESS PICKED UP AFTER THAT?

UH, I'LL BE IN THE
OFFICE IF YOU NEED ME.

- YES?
- EXCUSE ME, CAPTAIN?

YES. COME IN. COME IN.

- I HOPE I'M NOT BOTHERING YOU.
- NO, NO.

I CAN COME BACK AT A
MORE CONVENIENT TIME.

- THIS IS FINE. SIT DOWN, ROZ.
- I MEAN, IF YOU'RE BUSY.

ALL RIGHT, THEN.

WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?

WELL, I JUST WANT
TO TRY AND EXPLAIN

ABOUT SOME OF THE
UNFORTUNATE OCCURRENCES TODAY.

I WASN'T AWARE THERE WERE ANY.

WELL, THE WOJCIEHOWICZ INCIDENT.

OH, LOOK, THAT WAS, UH...

I MAY HAVE OVERREACTED.

IT'S FORGOTTEN.

I GUESS I'M JUST MOSTLY
A LITTLE APPREHENSIVE

THAT THESE THINGS

MIGHT UNCONSCIOUSLY
COLOR YOUR EVALUATION.

YOU DON'T HAVE MUCH
ELSE TO BASE IT ON.

YOU'VE NEVER REALLY HAD THE
OPPORTUNITY TO SEE ME IN ACTION.

I WAS REFERRING TO POLICE WORK.

I'M FULLY AWARE WHAT
YOU WERE REFERRING...

YES?

OH, UH, EXCUSE ME.

- THAT'S OKAY.
- THAT'S OKAY.

I WAS JUST LEAVING.

PARDON ME.

YES, WOJO? WHAT?

OH, UM...

OH, YEAH. I'M GONNA CHECK OUT

SOME OF THE OTHER PORNO
SHOPS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

YOU KNOW, MAYBE IT'S
ONE OF THEIR COMPETITORS.

GOOD IDEA.

YEAH, OR ELSE
MAYBE, UH, YOU KNOW,

IT'S A SYNDICATE MOVING IN.

I'LL CHECK THAT OUT, TOO.

FINE.

I'M NOT UP TO YOURS YET, WOJO.

I GUESS YOU'RE GONNA SAVE
THE LONGEST FOR LAST, HUH?

NEXT.

OH, BARN, I JUST
WANT TO LET YOU KNOW

THAT I'M GONNA BE
OUT FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

- OH?
- UH, YEAH.

I'M, UH, TAKING A LUNCH
MEETING WITH A LITERARY AGENT...

OH.

CONCERNING, UH,
POSSIBLE REPRESENTATION

AND FUTURE CAREER OPPORTUNITIES.

- HEY, GOOD LUCK.
- THANK YOU.

CAPTAIN?

GENTLEMEN, SHALL WE
ADJOURN TO THE SQUAD ROOM?

YEAH.

GOT A CALL FROM DISPATCH.

SQUAD CAR SPOTTED
SOMEBODY HAULING STUFF

OUT OF THE SCHUMANS' PLACE.

SEE THAT? WE'VE ONLY
BEEN GONE 20 MINUTES.

IT'S THE "0" IN THE 20.

IT'LL GET YOU EVERY TIME.

ALL RIGHT, WOJO,
YOU AND DIETRICH.

LISTEN, WOULD YOU PLEASE
WIPE OFF YOUR FEET FIRST?

I JUST WAXED THE
FLOORS OVER THERE.

YEAH, I PROMISE.

UH, SERGEANT WOJCIEHOWICZ
AND SERGEANT DIETRICH

ARE BRINGING A
COUPLE OF SUSPECTS IN.

I WOULDN'T BE
SURPRISED TO FIND OUT

THAT THE A&P IS BEHIND ALL THIS.

DO YOU REALLY THINK SO, EDDIE?

WHO KNOWS?

MAYBE THEY THINK OUR CUSTOMERS

ARE TAKING THE MONEY
FROM THEIR FOOD BUDGETS.

WELL, IN ANY CASE,
WHEN THEY BRING THEM IN,

YOU'LL HAVE TO SIGN COMPLAINTS,
AND THEN YOU'LL BE FREE TO GO.

THAT'S FINE WITH US, CAPTAIN.

ALL WE WANT TO DO IS END THIS
HARASSMENT ONCE AND FOR ALL.

WE DON'T WANT THIS
HANGING OVER OUR HEADS

DURING DOLLAR DAYS.

OF COURSE NOT.

YOU KNOW, SPRING IS
OUR BUSIEST SEASON.

YES, LOVE IS EVERYWHERE,
BUT SOME PEOPLE CAN'T GET IT.

DID YOU HAVE YOUR MEETING?

YEP, I HAD IT.

I TAKE IT ALL IT
DIDN'T GO TOO WELL.

YOU SHOULD HAVE HAD
THE MEETING AT 4:00.

THAT'S THE TIME
TO HAVE A MEETING.

HEY, I GOT TWO... COUNT
'EM... TWO WORDS FOR YOU.

WHAT HAPPENED?

BARNEY, LOOK, SHAPIRO DIDN'T
EVEN WANT TO READ MY MATERIAL,

MUCH LESS REPRESENT ME.

WHAT DID HE HAVE
THE MEETING FOR?

I DON'T KNOW, BARN.

I GUESS HE GETS HIS KICK
REJECTING PEOPLE IN PERSON.

HE SAID I DIDN'T HAVE
A TRACK RECORD YET,

THAT ONE SALE DIDN'T MAKE
ME A PROFESSIONAL WRITER...

YOU KNOW, CRAZY JUNK LIKE THAT.

AT LEAST YOU GOT
A LUNCH OUT OF IT.

OH.

OH, BARN, HOW YOU, UH...

HOW YOU COMING ALONG
WITH YOUR EVALUATIONS?

THAT'S THE FIRST TIME

YOU'VE SHOWN ANY
CONCERN ABOUT IT AT ALL.

OH, HEY, BARN, I MEAN, I'M
INTERESTED IN BOTH MY CAREERS.

THIS IS ALL A RIDICULOUS
MISUNDERSTANDING.

LOOK, WE ARE NOT
CRIMINALS. WE'RE FAMILY.

YEAH, WELL, WE'LL SEE.

MY GOD, RUSSELL, SUSAN,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

TAKE IT EASY, IRENE.

DIETRICH?

THIS IS RUSSELL SCHUMAN,
SUSAN SCHUMAN-EDWARDS.

HI, MOM, DAD.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

UH, WE, UH, CAUGHT THEM

WITH A STATION WAGON
PULLED UP BEHIND THE STORE.

THEY WERE HAULING
ALL THIS STUFF OUT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. THAT'S
MY OWN SON AND DAUGHTER.

WE DIDN'T BRING
THEM UP TO STEAL.

ESPECIALLY FROM US.

OH, COME ON, DAD.

WE DID THIS FOR YOUR OWN
GOOD, AND YOU KNOW THAT.

HOW LONG DO YOU THINK WE
WERE GONNA STAND AROUND

AND WATCH YOU TRYING TO EKE
OUT A LIVING SELLING SMUT AND FILTH?

YOU WOULDN'T SAY THAT
IF YOU SAW OUR MARKUP.

UH, I TAKE IT YOU TWO
WERE RESPONSIBLE

FOR THE OTHER
INCIDENTS, AS WELL?

I TRIED TALKING TO THEM. I
TRIED REASONING WITH THEM.

WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT, WAIT.
YOU DID THESE THINGS?

YOU DID ALL OF THESE
TERRIBLE THINGS?

WE WERE AFRAID FOR YOU.

I KNOW THE KIND OF PEOPLE
WHO ARE IN THE PORNO BUSINESS...

THE MOB... THE MOB, VIGILANTES.

YOU THREW A BRICK THROUGH
YOUR MOTHER'S WINDOW.

BETTER ME THAN SOME HOODLUM.

ALL RIGHT, WOULD YOU EXCUSE ME?

WOJO, LET'S GET A STATEMENT
FROM MR. SCHUMAN THE YOUNGER.

RIGHT HERE.

MRS. EDWARDS, IF YOU'LL
HAVE A SEAT RIGHT THERE.

DIETRICH.

UH, LICORI, YOU WANT
TO, UH, TAG THE EVIDENCE?

MR. AND MRS. SCHUMAN, YOU
CAN MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.

UH, LICORI, MAYBE YOU BETTER
GET MRS. EDWARDS' STATEMENT.

LOOK AT THIS, WILL YOU?

WHAT DO YOU GOT?

YOU GOT YOUR NOVELTIES.

YOU GOT SOME PARAPHERNALIA,
SOME PARTY FAVORS.

HOLD OFF, UH...

HOLD OFF TAGGING THAT STUFF
UNTIL WE SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

WHAT'S THAT THING
WITH THE FEATHERS?

NO IDEA.

IT'S REASONABLY PRICED, THOUGH.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. I GOT
TO GET AN ARREST FORM.

HERE YOU GO.

THANK YOU.

DON'T MENTION IT.

I WON'T IF YOU WON'T.

IT'S A DEAL.

IT'S INTERESTING
HOW THESE THINGS

HAVE A HABIT OF WORKING
OUT BY THEMSELVES, YOU KNOW?

OH, YEAH.

YOU KNOW, I GUESS YOU COULD SAY

THAT I GET ALONG GOOD WITH
MY FELLOW WORKERS, HUH?

AND I CAN HANDLE DIFFICULT
PROBLEMS ON MY OWN.

IS THAT YOUR EVALUATION?

WHATEVER YOU SAY.

HELLO... IRA.

WHAT THE HELL ARE
YOU TALKING ABOUT?

NOW WE KNOW.

IT'S IRRELEVANT.

NOT TO US, IRA.

DON'T CALL ME THAT.
LET ME HAVE THAT PAPER.

SORRY.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE, HARRIS?

YOU'RE A 5... A
LOUSY, STINKING 5.

I'VE BEEN CALLED WORSE
NUMBERS THAN THAT.

UH, BARN, I GOT AN I.D. ON
1223 FROM HIS FINGERPRINTS.

OH?

IRA GRUBB.

IRA GRUBB?

YEAH, IT SOUNDS SORT OF LIKE
A MOROCCAN RESTAURANT, HUH?

PUT IT ON HIS ARREST RECORD
AND GIVE HIM A DESK APPEARANCE.

YOU GOT IT.

YEAH?

UH, GOT THE PRELIMINARY
INFORMATION ON THOSE KIDS,

BUT, UH, I MEAN, YOU
WANT ME TO FIND OUT

IF THE SCHUMANS ARE GONNA
PRESS CHARGES OR WHAT?

'CAUSE, YOU
KNOW, IT'S KIND OF...

YEAH.

OR MAYBE I...

HARRIS, ONE WOULD THINK
THAT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

WOULD RESPECT THE
SANCTITY OF THE DESK.

OH, YEAH, BARN.

BUT, UH, I MEAN...

WELL, I MEAN, YOU'RE IN A ROOM.

YOU GOT TO PUT YOUR
EYES SOMEWHERE.

BARNEY, I'VE BEEN IN
THIS ROOM SO MANY TIMES,

I'M BORED AT LOOKING AT
THE PICTURES ON THE WALLS.

IS THAT A NEW CALENDAR?

I WANT TO ASK YOU SOMETHING!
I WANT TO ASK YOU SOMETHING!

WHY DON'T YOU SIT DOWN?

IF WE'RE SUCH AN
EMBARRASSMENT TO YOU,

WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE
A STICK OF DYNAMITE,

BLOW OFF THE DOOR WITH IT?

THIS IS A POLICE STATION!

PLEASE, LET'S... QUIET!

THANK YOU.

RUSSELL, LEAVE
YOUR FATHER ALONE.

ALL RIGHT, IT APPEARS BY THE
TENOR OF THIS CONVERSATION

THAT, UH, YOU INTEND TO
PROCEED WITH THIS MATTER,

SO LET'S GET A COMPLAINT FORM,

AND WE CAN SIGN IT SO THAT WE
CAN FORMALLY BOOK YOUR CHILDREN.

RIGHT, BARN.

BOOK?

BOOK MY CHILDREN?

YES, AND... AND
GENERALLY FOLLOWED

BY, UH, MUG SHOTS,

FINGERPRINTING,
ARRAIGNMENT, TRIAL.

OH, MY GOD, A TRIAL.

I LIKE YOUR STYLE.

SCARE THE HELL OUT OF THEM,
THEN JUST LEAN BACK AND WAIT.

DAD, YOU KNOW, THIS ALL
COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED

IF YOU JUST HAD TAKEN THAT
CONDOMINIUM DOWN IN FLORIDA.

YOU'RE STARTING AGAIN,
THAT SAME BUSINESS?

I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT.

THEY HAVE GOLF,
TENNIS, EXERCISE ROOMS.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO
DO... DROP DEAD IN THE SAUNA?

NO, DAD, I WANT YOU TO
BE HAPPY, FOR GOD'S SAKES!

WE ARE HAPPY.

YOU CAN'T BE, NOT
DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING!

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WE'RE MERCHANTS.

WE'VE BEEN MERCHANTS
ALL OUR LIVES.

WE SOLD BREAD AND TOMATOES.

NOW WE SELL MAGAZINES
WITH NAKED PEOPLE,

AND MAYBE THEY DISGUST YOU,

BUT THEY'RE OUR MAGAZINES IN
OUR STORE AND NOBODY ELSE'S.

BELIEVE ME, WE WOULDN'T LAST
THREE DAYS IN THAT CONDOMINIUM.

OKAY, BUT DON'T YOU SEE
THAT IT JUST TEARS US UP

EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN
AND SEE YOU IN THAT PLACE?

DAD, MOM...

IF ONLY YOU DIDN'T
LIVE OVER THE STORE.

OKAY.

YOU'RE GETTING OUT, IRA.

I'M NOT IRA ANYMORE.

I DON'T BLAME YOU.

LOOK, WE'RE ALWAYS
GETTING NUMBERS

FORCED ON US ANYWAY, RIGHT?

SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBERS, BANK
NUMBERS, CREDIT CARD NUMBERS,

DRIVER'S LICENSE
NUMBERS, ZIP CODES.

WHY SHOULDN'T WE BE ABLE
TO CHOOSE OUR OWN NUMBERS,

A NUMBER THAT HAS
MEANING FOR US, HMM?

YEAH.

9th HOUR, COURTROOM 28.

928? OH, NO, NO, NO.

THAT'S NOT SPIRITUALLY
ACCEPTABLE TO ME.

UNLESS... UNLESS...

I WEAR A 3-PIECE SUIT. THEN...

I'LL WORK IT OUT.

UH, LISTEN, CAPTAIN,

WE DECIDED WE'RE NOT
GONNA PRESS CHARGES.

OH, REALLY?

BESIDES, A MOTHER CAN'T
TESTIFY AGAINST HER CHILDREN.

NO, NO, NO, MOM.

IT'S A WIFE CAN'T TESTIFY
AGAINST HER HUSBAND.

RUSSELL, DON'T
CORRECT YOUR MOTHER.

BIG-SHOT ATTORNEY.

UH, IF THAT'S THE CASE,
YOU'RE ALL FREE TO GO.

WELL, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, CAPTAIN,

AND I'M REALLY SORRY
WE WASTED YOUR TIME.

QUITE ALL RIGHT.

WOULD YOU HAND ME THOSE
FLESH DIGESTS, PLEASE?

THANK YOU.

OH, WHO TORE THE
CELLOPHANE ON THIS ONE?

MAIL CALL.

CAPTAIN MILLER,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

MR. SCHUMAN, MRS. EDWARDS.

- THANK YOU VERY MUCH, CAPTAIN.
- MY PLEASURE.

- SHALL WE GO?
- MM-HMM.

DON'T FORGET YOUR BOX.

OH, I-I-I'M GONNA GO ON AHEAD.

OH, HELLO.

AFTERNOON, MA'AM.

YOU LOOK VERY FAMILIAR.

YES, SO DO YOU, MA'AM.

OH, YEAH.

AND HE'S A POLICEMAN.

WHAT IS IT, LEVITT?

- MAIL, SIR.
- THANK YOU.

OH, AND POSSIBLY I COULD HAVE A
FEW WORDS ABOUT THE EVALUATIONS?

LEVITT, I'M AFRAID I CAN
ENTERTAIN NO MORE QUESTIONS

ABOUT THE EVALUATIONS.

IT WASN'T A QUESTION, SIR.

I WAS JUST WONDERING IF I
CAN INCLUDE A STATEMENT.

THERE ARE NO PROVISIONS
FOR STATEMENTS, COMMENTS,

OR ANYTHING FROM ANYBODY BUT ME!

I SEE, SIR.

AND THEY'RE TAKING
YOUR WORD AS GOSPEL?

THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT THEY'RE DOING.

BARN, I MEAN, IS THIS A
POINT SYSTEM OR WHAT?

ALL RIGHT, GENTLEMEN,
WOULD YOU JUST WAIT HERE?

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

ANYBODY WANT TO GO TO LUNCH?

ALL RIGHT, HERE
YOU GO, WOJO, LICORI.

THE EVALUATIONS, UH...

READ THEM, DISCUSS THEM.

YOU MAY COPY THEM IF YOU WISH.

BARNEY, I MEAN, THIS
REALLY ISN'T NECESSARY.

NO, NO, NO, I INSIST.
PLEASE, READ THEM.

EVERYBODY SATISFIED?

OH, I MEAN, IF YOU HAVE
ANY, UH, QUESTIONS,

ANY CLARIFICATION
NEEDED, ANY SUGGESTIONS?

THIS IS FINE.

- FINE, SIR, FINE.
- IT'S ALL RIGHT WITH ME.

GOOD. I'M GLAD YOU ALL CONCUR.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE MEANT
BY "AGGRESSIVELY ZEALOUS."

I DON'T THINK I'M
THAT METHODICAL.

ANYBODY ELSE GET
"FLASHY EFFICIENCY"?

I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT HE MEANS BY THIS.

I'LL SEE YOU ALL ONE AT A
TIME, IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER.