Awkward. (2011–2016): Season 3, Episode 10 - Redefining Jenna - full transcript

Previously on Awkward...

I'm worried this Collin thing

might be more
than just a fantasy.

You've read
Jenna's paper, right?

There were no names,
no specifics,

and no way anyone could
figure out it was about Collin.

I read your paper.
You need to come over.

With delusions of desire
for Collin put to bed,

in the bed of my head,

I was free and clear to let
my conscience take a rest.

Collin had a girlfriend.
I had a boyfriend.



And we could just go
about our business

as casual classmates.

♪ By now ♪

♪ a strange love ♪

I have something for you.

Apparently his flirtation
was not laid to rest,

and I had to redefine
appropriate boundaries.

What Collin needed
was a subtle hint.

Or a strong suggestion.

[Bell rings]

Jenna, hold up.

What?

This is for you.

No.
I can't take it.



Why not?

Do I need
to spell it out for you?

Yes.

Stop with the sexy notes,

the eyelashes, the whispers,
and the touches.

I know what you're doing,
and it's not appropriate.

There's obviously
some chemistry between us,

but I am in a relationship,
and so are you.

May I?

This is an invitation
to an open house

for that photographer that
you liked, Elisabeth Caren.

Sexy notes.

You're hilarious.

And an idiot.

The party's on Friday.

It would be awesome
to have you there.

Show my parents I actually
made new friends.

- Hey, man.
- Hey.

I hope you guys
can make it on Friday.

In the meantime,
have a good Thanksgiving.

You too.

What was that?

Oh, Collin invited us
to a party

for that photographer we liked
at his girlfriend's house.

But Friday is the Julies'
Annual Black Friday party.

Why not go to both?
You can do that.

Yes, yes, I can.

Done.

There, we are RSVP'd.

We?

No, I don't wanna go.

- I can't go alone.
- Why not?

There were a million reasons.

Come on, we can go
early to Collin's

and show up fashionably late
to the next one.

Please.

Okay.

Everyone, pull out your phones
and get ready to flip.

It is all about to go down
in three, two...

[Phones chime]

Ah, we're invited
to the After Mall Ball.

What is that?

TBE.
Scroll to the hosts.

"Hosted by Julie, Julie,
and Tamara."

You're throwing a party
with the Julies?

Yes, I replaced Sadie,

and technically
it's Julie and Tessa

- because the other Julie--
All: - Which Julie?

The Julie that went to rehab.

Tessa looks like rehab Julie,

so everyone started
calling her "Julie,"

and she just went with it
because it's easier that way.

- How'd that happen?
- I don't know, she's easygoing.

No, how did you get
to host the party?

Well, the Black Friday party,
the BFP,

was getting confused
with the mafia's

Black Hearts Party, BHP,

and too many Asians
were showing up.

So I pitched calling the party
the After Mall Ball, the AMB.

The Julies loved
the new name so much,

they made me co-host.

I've been anointed.

And I think I have been too.

- Something weird is happening.
- What do you mean?

It all started when
I got to school this morning.

I was looking
for a place to park,

and then suddenly
for the first time,

I was waved into a prime spot

with my name on it.

As I got out of my Sonic,

I was handed a specialty latte.

Vanilla mocha half caf with--

A splash of splenda?
That's your fave.

No shit.

But that isn't even
the freakiest part.

Watch.

I was just snapping.

I have no idea what's going on!

What is going on?

Tamara is co-hosting?
This has got to be a joke.

Or a mistake.

Maybe they left your name off
by accident.

They probably
don't know this went out,

and when they see it, they are
going to have a conniption.

Julie, Julie,
I just got an invitation

to the Black Friday Party,
which I assume was bootlegged

since there were
some glaring errors.

Like what?

Well, in addition
to the stupid new title,

I noticed that some freak
of nature added her name.

I would be more than happy
to send out a retraction.

You're welcome.

Not necessary.

The party needed
to be reinvented,

so we made some changes.

- And left me out?
- Yes.

Explain.

Please.

It's simple.

You can't help us anymore,

'cause a bitch without money
is just a bitch.

And we don't need any help
in that department.

Good job on the mass text.

Thank you.

Don't thank us.
Not yet.

You're still going
to need to get us

everything on this list
by early Friday,

so we have time to set up.

- Tomorrow's Thanksgiving.
- And your point is?

I have a lot of work tonight.

Come on, let's get this done.

You really should add
one more thing to that list.

- What?
- Some balls.

[Alternative music]

Thanksgiving was over,

and I was still stuffed
with gratitude.

My appetite for food
and my boyfriend had returned,

and suddenly my Friday
didn't seem so black.

[Laughter]

It was amazing.

That was the most
exhilarating 11 hours

I've ever spent in a mall
without being on a toilet.

They've made a lot of leaps
in IBS medication.

It's all about going early
and with the proper preparation.

The leotards get you in and out

without pit stops
to the dressing rooms.

And the pads keep you
from pit stops to the ER.

L Dog, we gotta show our girl
our tag team maneuver.

Ah!

Here we go.

Yep.

Now imagine this
one-of-a-kind Afghan sweater

is just dangling
out in the open

near a frenzy of rabid whores.

For whatever reason,
they don't notice it

until you got to it,
grabbed it, and then--

Someone is on top of you,
taking the ugly--

Trendsetting.

Acquired tasteful garb

out of your hand.

What do you do?

You call in your teammate.

[Blows whistle]

Hut!

[Both grunt]

Yeah.

[Both grunting]

It was magic.

And I got some loot
for you too.

Anything I could wear tonight?

Totes, your mom scored you

a ton of your standard
snooze fest fashion.

[Pop music]

Oh, I bought that for me.

What she's trying to say is,
"it's too slutty."

Ahh.

No, what I'm trying to say

is that it feels
a little mature.

Would you mind?

I wanna make a statement.

200 bucks is a statement.

Spending a thousand is stupid.

It was worth every hour
of the last year of baby-sitting

to solidify my new status.

Plus I don't have
to save for a car anymore

now that I have you
to drive me around.

Oh, thanks.

There are only two bags of ice!

That's all they had
at the store.

The list said a minimum of ten.

You have to go
to another store.

You said to set up the tables.

You can do that
after you change your shirt.

You're looking sweaty.

Because I am.

I've been doing
all of your dirty work.

This isn't dirty work.
It's fun.

Just go change.

I'll have Jenna bring some ice
on her way over.

Go! Now!

Have fun!

[Line ringing]

- Hey.
- Could you grab some ice?

Uh, we just got to Collin's,

but we can pick up
some ice after we leave.

No, I need it now!
Damn it!

Jake texted me
the same request.

Call Tamara back.

Tell her we can have ice there
in 30 minutes.

- 30 minutes?
- We'll stop into Collin's,

we'll take a loop,
and then we'll hit the road.

We can't just stay
for 30 minutes. It's rude.

How long does it take
to look at pictures?

Photographs, and we can't
just walk in and walk out.

You go.
I'll pick you up later.

Get back in?

I said you were coming,

and if you don't,
you'll embarrass me.

I'll embarrass you in front
of who, people you don't know?

Yes, don't be an asshole.

Why not? You want me to go
into a house full of them.

Admit it, you're afraid
you'll sound stupid

and embarrass yourself.

Why are you being so bitchy?

Because you're embarrassing me,

and I have never
embarrassed you.

Oh, really?

What about the start
of sophomore year

when everyone thought
you tried to kill yourself?

I didn't try to kill myself.

I know that now,
but I didn't know that then.

I thought maybe
it was because of me.

You? Why you?

Because you had your accident

the same day we slept together.

How do you think
that fucked with my head?

You didn't even try
to explain it to me.

Instead you
obsessively stared at me

from a distance for weeks.

What was I supposed to think?

You didn't want
to be seen with me.

'Cause I was mortified.

You said you were
never embarrassed of me.

I lied.

And suddenly,
I died... inside.

[Gentle music]

I'm sorry, that came out wrong.

You lied to me?

I didn't want to.

I was just embarrassed

of how insecure
and stupid I was.

I never wanted you
to know, Jenna.

You know me.
You know how I feel.

But did I?

Suddenly my own feelings
on the matter

were missing in action.

I'm frustrated.

I didn't even want
to go to Collin's.

I just came here for you.

Sometimes it feels like
all I'm doing

is making amends
for how we started.

So now this is my fault?

No, no, it's my fault.

I'm the one who made a point
to focus on you,

to make sure you felt
secure and significant.

In the process, sometimes
you make me feel insignificant.

How?

When have you ever asked
how I'm doing with my parents?

It was really hard
for me, Jenna,

and you never checked in.

I just assumed--

Exactly, you assumed.

♪ Saving me love songs ♪

I thought it was something
you didn't want to talk about,

or you'd bring it up.

Matty, I'm sorry, you're right.

I'm being selfish.

And...

you don't have to go with me
to the party.

I'm not gonna go either.
Let's just both not go.

Come on, you want
to see the photos.

You'll feel bad if we don't go,
so we'll go.

I'll go, but, um...

you go help Jake, I insist.

You sure?

Pick you up a little later?

Don't worry about it.

I'll see if I can get a ride
with Collin and Angelique.

♪ I want to save ♪

♪ ♪

♪ you're still saving me... ♪

- This look okay?
- Looks fine.

- What about this one?
- Tamara!

Oh, yes?

There are
no bottle service tables.

Our VIPs need somewhere to sit.

Party starts in 15,

and everyone who's anyone
comes early.

Get it done.

Or you're done.

[Sighs]

Why didn't you remind me
about the bottle service?

I don't know.

Maybe because you never
told me about it.

Now I look like an idiot.

- Not true.
- Really?

Yeah, because I'm the idiot,

running around
at your beck and call,

allowing you to treat me
like your bitch.

Not anymore.

If you want a bitch,
look somewhere else.

I'm outta here.

Right after you get down.

I have mixers.

Ooh.

- Bad timing?
- Perfect.

Now you can give me a ride home

before I commit social suicide.

I forgot the VIP tables,

and I don't have time
to fix it.

- I think I can help.
- How?

It all went down
about five minutes ago,

- so I'm still processing.
- What went down?

The transition.

I was heading into the party

when I was escorted
to an idling car nearby.

There in the back seat
was a person

as elusive and mythical
as a unicorn--

the guy behind every answer
to every test.

The guy who runs the numbers
and launders mafia funds.

T, I met The Accountant.

No way.

Way.
And that's not all.

He opened his briefcase
and handed me a key.

A key to what?

Everything.

Does that mean you're--

Head of the mafia.

I don't believe you.

It's true.
I can prove it.

See this phone?

The accountant told me,

"There is only one number
programmed into it.

Use it whenever
for whatever."

So what do you need?

Small cocktail tables,
expensive booze,

and cotton candy.

Yes, I need
small cocktail tables,

expensive booze, cotton candy,

and a bouncy house.

Castle or jail?

Castle.

[Upbeat music]

Matty was right.

A 20-minute lap
would have sufficed.

I had no one to talk to,

and Collin
was nowhere in sight.

I had to trigger plan "B"
and call Matty to get me.

Holy shit.

You look stunning.

I'm so glad you decided
not to ditch me.

Nope.

Where's Matty?

Ditching.

But he sends his regrets.

And I send him mine,

because look
at what he's missing.

Wow.

They're amazing.

[Camera shutter clicks]

Sorry for the rogue photo.

Elisabeth's taking pictures
of all the guests

for an improvised installation.

That's so cool.
You are so cool.

Feel free to take
any and all pictures of me.

She's embarrassing herself.

Dare I say told you so?

We never should have
invited Tamara to co-host.

She's a spaz.

The night's still young,
ladies.

Kick her out, and I can
help you turn this around.

She did get a bouncy house.

Brills.

It's not brills.
It's amateur.

Anyone can rent one.

If that's the case,

then why didn't you
think of it last year?

I don't know.

Maybe because you seem to be
lacking something to bounce.

- Feel free to leave.
- And never come back.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean that.

Jesus, what has
gotten into you?

Jesus.

Can you believe
someone put that out?

No one should mock the dead,
no one!

Oh, God, I need another drink.

Where's Jenna?

Oh, she'll be here soon.

[Phone chimes]

_

Babe, please, can we just
talk about this tomorrow?

You know it's for the best.

Let's just talk this out
over breakfast, okay?

Good, I'll see you then.

- Everything okay?
- Sort of.

Angelique's not coming?

No.

Please tell me
you're not gonna leave.

I'm not going anywhere.

Do you have a condom?

For what?

You don't have sex.

Maybe I do.

You don't know me!

All right.

[Groans]

If you two want
to make a scene,

then you need
to take it outside.

We are outside.

Then you need
to take it inside.

Great idea.
Now help.

[Groans]

- Okay, okay.
- [Groans]

What is going on with you?

My life is over.

No, your neck
is almost straight.

You'll be back
on the squad soon.

No, not mylifelife.

My afterlife.
I'm a sinner.

No, you're a drunk.

And a murderer.

I killed Ricky Schwartz.

It was an accident.

Ricky wanted to get Sadie back

and had no one to turn to,

so he turned to me.

And I was just trying
to be a good friend.

So when he asked me
to go for a drive,

I didn't think
anything about it.

And then he started to cry,

and I hugged him,
and then he kissed me.

And one thing led to another,

and we kissed privates.

Lissa, he died
of an allergic reaction

to peanuts, not from sex.

I know, but that's just it.

Before we went for the drive,

I ate Thai food.

- Shit!
- Shit!

Sadie, he didn't love me.

He loved you.

I was just a rebound.
He said I was too skinny.

And now I'm gonna
pay the price.

I'm going to hell.

God already sent me a warning
by breaking my neck.

Okay.

You are not going to hell,

and God didn't break your neck.

I did.

There is no way that Ricky died

of secondhand
peanut consumption.

It's scientifically impossible.

My uncle's a doctor.

The amount of peanuts necessary

to send someone
into anaphylactic shock

is way greater than the sum

of what was simply mere
residue left on your lips.

His death, not your fault.

It's not?

No fucking way.

Believe me?

Good.

Now go, get fucked up.

You clearly need a drink.

- How did you know all that?
- I made it up.

My uncle's a jeweler.

She probably did kill Ricky,

but I don't want her
to beat herself up

for the rest of her life.

She'll end up in porn.

I'm so sick
of being the nice guy.

Tamara treats me
like her freaking purse, man.

"Jake, hold this.
Jake, hold that.

Jake, where are my tampons?"

So break up with her.

I can't.
I love her.

And I love you.

I'm sorry, I've been
so caught up in my own BS.

I sucked you dry
and myself hard.

You didn't suck that hard.

Dude, that bounce house
is intense.

Intensely popular.

Was that a smile or a smirk?

Smile.

This is the best night
of my life.

Where's Jenna?

Good question.

[Phone chimes] _

Am I keeping you?

No.

Yes.

But I'm enjoying being kept.

Come here.

I wanna show you something.

[Electronic music]

I can't believe
she put this together tonight.

Did you find yourself?

There.

I look so different.

It's what Elisabeth does.

She redefines you
through her lens.

Wish it were that easy.

What?

To redefine myself.

Why would you want to do that?

I don't know.

So that I could be
less of an embarrassment

to myself and others.

Like when I misread
your intentions

and the sexual tension
that clearly doesn't exist.

I never said it didn't exist.

It exists.

And it's part of the reason
why Angelique and I broke up.

You broke up?
When?

When I realized I wanted to be
with someone more like you.

So I should probably get going.

Right.

You have that other party
to get to.

Still need a ride?

I don't know.

It feels like
a bit of an imposition.

It's not.
I'll get my keys.

[All cheering]

[Laughter]

♪ We are ♪

♪ I've come apart,
and you made me ♪

Is it really midnight?

♪ A pretty box of your evil ♪

Yeah, just about.

♪ So tired ♪

♪ so easy, I ♪

Thanks again for the ride.

I'm sorry about your breakup.

Me too.

When it comes to love...

you think the hunt
is better than the kill?

I don't know.

With Matty, we had sex
before we knew each other.

So... the kill came
before the hunt.

[Phone chimes]

_

Jake, come on!

All right, I'm coming!

Jeez.

[Phone chimes]

_

Are you sure you want
to go to this party?

Honestly, no.

But if I don't,
I'll be selfish.

And apparently that's something
I need to work on.

That's ridiculous.

You're 16.

If there's ever a time
to be selfish, it's now.

You have no pressure,
no real responsibilities.

Why can't you
put yourself first?

'Cause it's not
the right thing to do?

I think
you should change it up,

redefine yourself
through your own lens.

Choose you.

Choose me?

It was a new concept

and scary yet exciting.

So I did.

[Rock music]

♪ ♪

Hey.