Awkward. (2011–2016): Season 2, Episode 8 - Time After Time - full transcript

- Previously on Awkward...
- Who is this Ben guy?

He's the guy your mom
should have married.

My mom's staying at the hotel,

so we've got the place
to ourselves.

Ask Matty, he had a piece
of your Hamilton Pie

long before you did.

And one more thing...

I love you, Jake Rosati.

Gone were the secrets
and heartache of my past.

I was looking at my future.

Timing.
It was everything,



and my time had arrived.

I was head over heels for Jake

and ready to show him,
because our love was the stuff

of poetry, of novels, of blogs.

We were like Romeo and Juliet,

except our love story didn't
involve a fake suicide.

Been there, done that.

How about we make our getaway
before things get ugly?

They already have.

- What's wrong?
- Us.

But "us" was great.
"Us" was perfect.

"Us" was about to go back
to my house and do it.

If you're not ready,
it's totally okay.

- There's no pressure.
- I don't want to do this here.



So how about we do this
at my house?

- Maybe in my bed?
- I'm not feeling it.

This relationship.
I don't want to lead you on.

- Are you being serious?
- Yeah.

I think our timing is off.

What does that mean?

I'm breaking up with you.

♪ ♪

What's wrong?
You look weird.

Are your control tops
making you nauseous?

I think I'm in shock.

Jake just broke up with me.

What?

Flower girl,
report to the dais, pronto.

This wedding is about
to go off the rails,

and it is my duty as
head bridesmaid to take charge.

You were
the default bridesmaid.

And lucky for the lady
I'm an experienced one at that.

Oh, J "Operation
Back Off Backstreet Boy"

is in full effect.

Someone spread a rumor that

Ben's got a big
sham-a-lama ding-dong.

"Someone" being me.
Now scoot.

Let's move this along
before Ally passes out.

Jenna, I don't even know what
to say, and I always have

something to say.

Okay, now I do.

Why would Jake dump you?
He busted out

the "L" word.
You must have misunderstood.

It's kind of hard
to misunderstand

"I'm breaking up with you."

No misinterpreting that.

He said our timing was off.

Maybe I waited too long
to say "I love you,"

and he started to doubt me.

That doesn't make sense.
I'm gonna get the real deets.

Please.

My heart was broken into
a million pieces,

but unfortunately,
my mind was still intact,

which meant I couldn't ignore
the unsettling realization

that I was... devastated.

Trouble in paradise?

Just feeling moved
by the magic.

They're called feelings.
You don't have them.

That's where
you're wrong, Jenna.

I do have feelings.

When I see you sitting there,

all alone,
in your little baby dress,

with your little sad face,
I feel...

so glad I'm not you!

Ladies and gentlemen,
please grab a partner

and stand by to join
the bride and groom

in their first dance.

My lady.

Whoo-hoo!

♪ It's an empty space
that stands beside me now ♪

My bad, not time
for the first dance yet.

Make it a dance mix.

♪ ♪

Yes! I totally destroyed
your bunker.

- How's that taste, McKibben?
- Eh, like victory.

Game over.

That is so not fair.

I told you not to take
your eyes off the screen.

Hey. How's the wedding?

I broke up with Jenna.

Wait, what?

Why?

I don't think
she's being honest with me.

- About what?
- That other guy.

The guy that she slept with.

You remember him, right?

The guy she was
with before you?

Or during.
I don't know.

I just have a gut feeling that
that guy is still around.

Dude, how could she
be seeing another guy?

- She's always with you.
- And you.

Are you sure there's
not something that

you've picked up on?

Maybe something
that I don't see?

No.

As my best friend,
if you knew something...

You'd tell me, right?

Yeah.

Then tell me,

what don't I know?

I-I think you know
it all, man.

Jenna really likes you,
and only you.

Listen, how about we meet up?
We can talk this out.

I gotta go.

What's going on?

Jake just broke up with Jenna.

Hmm.

- She really is in love.
- Yeah.

You can tell by how hard
she's humping his leg.

Hey.
Don't be sad, L-dawg.

You could get married again.

I mean, you still
got your looks,

and I'm sure there
are thousands of dating websites

that would love to sign you up.

You may have
to lower your standards,

but you should have
no trouble roping in some

frumpster like Dan.

I'm gonna get some air.

Why the pouty face, J?

Just tired.

Tired of my life.

Lighten up, girl.
It's a wedding, not a funeral.

Where's the boy scout?

Why aren't you two
tearing it up?

I don't know.

I just need a break.

You can't take a break.
You've got obligations.

What is with you Hamiltons?

This is not your day, okay?
It's not your day!

Rosati, what's going on?

Jenna has this crazy idea
you broke up with her.

It doesn't sound
that crazy to me.

I don't get it.
You guys are perfect.

Worthy of your own moniker,

like "Jakenna."

Perfection can be deceiving.

Why are you talking like
a fortune cookie?

Rosati, you're the good guy.

The kind of guy who reams Sadie

just to protect
his girlfriend's friend.

I did that for you.

You're my friend.

And as your friend,
it's my job to lay out the obvi.

If you really wanted to dump
Jenna, why are you still here?

Good point.

Jake, I really need
to talk to you.

What's happening?

He definitely DTR'd.
It's over.

I tried to get
to the bottom of it,

but he kept giving me
weird non-answers

like my cell phone robot.

Shenanigans.

You have to call shenanigans.

Then I call it.
He owes me an explanation.

I'll just keep working
this wedding!

For no reason.

Hey, beautiful.

Ricky, I told you
to stay the--

Hi, honey.
What can I do for you?

You can take off my pants.

Seriously?

Ugh.

Jake!

Jake!

Jake, stop!

Jake, please!

- Busted!
- Mm!

- Damn you, Ben.
- All right.

You know, I have been trying
to get to you all night,

but your daughter
has been on my tail.

I don't know if you know this,

but, uh, she has you
on lockdown.

- Get out of the way!
- No.

Not until you explain to me
what's going on.

Everything was great,

and then you just dump me
out of the blue?

- Move, Jenna!
- What happened?

Nothing happened.

Did you get my message?

Yeah. Yeah,
I got your message

loud and clear
that this isn't working.

Why are you being so cold?

I'm just-- I'm so confused.

Just-- please,
explain this to me.

Just talk to me.

Fine. Get in.

We were gonna go out
for some Mexican food,

'cause we took Spanish,
so, Dan and I, we're like,

"let's go get some enchiladas,"

'cause we both love enchiladas,
like, a lot.

We were pretty crazy
growing up.

The problem is
he's got no timing.

With comedy,
it's all about the timing.

Someone needs to put him
out of his misery

so I can be put out of mine.

- El gato!
- Wrap it up, Gary!

So, yeah, so-- cheers.

To my best friend
and his hot piece of tail.

Okay, that's good, all right.

Well, it looks like
our maid of honor is MIA

at the moment.

I'm Valerie, head bridesmaid,

- and I've known Abby for--
- Ally.

I've known Ally for...

Two weeks now?

Which doesn't seem like
a long time,

but if you think about it,

it's about a third of the time
that she's known the groom.

So let's just pretend like we're
dealing in dog years, right?

See, Gare?

How it's done.

I'd be lying if I said
I never thought about you.

Well, I know that we missed
our chance in high school,

but... now that we are

older and wiser.

Hmm, I might be older,
but I am definitely not wiser.

I don't know
if you heard, but...

I ruined my marriage,
and... my daughter hates me.

Utterly impossible.

The only one who could
ever hate you is me.

You? Why you?

For breaking my heart

and choosing the other guy,
what's his name?

Come on,
you were never heartbroken.

For years.

And I will stay that way,

unless you make good
on an outstanding debt.

And what would that be?

You offered
me a kiss good-bye.

Mm. Which, as I recall,
you did not collect.

But, see, that was a mistake,

and I would like
to right that wrong.

Suddenly, my timing
had gone from bad to worse.

Dad, you need to pick up.

Dad? Dad.
Dad, stop talking and listen.

Ben is here.

And then,

after a few Cuban hummers--

get your minds
out of the gutter,

it's a drink.

♪ To quietly remind us ♪

♪ time, though
it mostly slips away ♪

♪ doesn't seem
to mind the wait ♪

Like you care.

Drop the phone, McKibben.

I got something
a little more interesting

for you to look at.

♪ Do you feel
the same as I do? ♪

♪ close your eyes ♪

♪ think of what
you have beside you ♪

Stop moving so fast.
I need to talk to you.

I have to stay on the move
to avoid a pre-teen Ricky perv.

And I'm on clean-up duty.

I'm gonna go.

Wha--
You can't leave me here!

I'm sorry, T.
I can't stay.

How are you gonna
get home, walk?

Crap, I'm being paged.

Don't move, I'll be right back.

Lil' bitch, where's your mom?

With Ben.
I guess your plan

to ruin my parents'
relationship worked. Happy?

Listen, your dad's the one

who ruined their relationship,
and it started years ago.

What are you talking about?

Think about it.
Why would I hate buzzkill

this much for no reason?

Because I'm the one who had
to pick up the pieces

when he screwed over your mom
over and over again.

You're drunk.

And you're a dork.

But at least tomorrow,
I'll be sober.

For a while.

Why are you stopping?

Oh, I can't focus.
We've gotta put this on hold.

Seriously?

There's nothing you can do
about their break up.

- Let it go.
- I'm sorry,

but I gotta take care
of my friend.

- Ugh.
- Congratulations.

- What do you want?
- My wife.

Oh, mm, she's having
so much fun without you.

Ally, I don't want
to get into it

- on your wedding day.
- You're a schmuck.

Where is she?

♪ Well, you've got to go ♪

♪ you've got to go ♪

Yet again,
your timing is impeccable.

Now, leave.

It's what you do best.

♪ Felt too strongly

♪ now it's time ♪

I couldn't tell if it was
the two dozen Bobby Pins

making my brain hurt,
or Jake's merciless words

playing over and over
in my head.

Our timing was off?

Did he just throw that
out there

or was it something real?

And if so, was it off
with my parents too?

If what Ally said was true,

then Ben wasn't
my mother's Matty, my dad was,

which made me the living,
breathing manifestation

of my parents' bad timing.

The mistake who kept my mom
from her Jake.

And if that thought
didn't destroy me,

there was another one lying
in wait to finish the job.

Would my mom have ended up
with Ben if it wasn't for me?

That bartender
would not tend to me.

He cut me off.

Ugh.

At my own wedding.

Can you believe that crap?
Make sure we don't tip him.

Lucky for you, your fave niece
is here to save the day.

- You're welcome.
- Mm.

- Hey!
- Okay.

Hey, that's my shot.

The position of bridesmaid
should not be taken lightly.

Come on!
You're spoiling all the fun.

She is one drink away

- from peeing herself.
- No more.

We are responsible
for making sure that

the bride is presentable
for her consummation.

I can't believe you're gonna
be in my wedding pictures.

Maybe the photographer
can color you out.

You know what would
go well with this shot?

Vodka chaser.

Smile.

I love you guys!

Oof.

My walk of lame left me
with a lot of blisters

and a little clarity.

There was never a wrong time
to say "I love you."

If Jake left me because
I didn't meet his deadline,

maybe I was lucky
to get out when I did.

Or maybe I was just trying
to make myself feel better

because I was still
paralyzed by the pain?

♪ Will I break?
Will I stand strong? ♪

I heard what happened.

What happened?
Because I'm still in the dark.

He didn't say much.

How are you?

Numb.

Please tell me
what's wrong with me.

Nothing.

Nothing is wrong with you.

♪ I don't wanna break
your heart tonight ♪

Something's wrong
with this zipper.

Can you help me?

No! No, unzip it.

It's too restricting.

You know, I really didn't
come here for Ally tonight.

Ben, I have a lot of baggage.

Which I can carry.

- I am a strong guy.
- You are.

You have always been strong.

And you will be strong again.

♪ All alone, stay with me
until the dawn ♪

Hmm.

♪ Can't keep falling apart ♪

- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- ♪ We gotta let this go ♪

♪ my body can't say no ♪

I-I'd better
go wrangle the bride.

♪ Let's feel
what the beat is for ♪

Good to see you.

- You too.
- ♪ Yeah yeah yeah yeah ♪

- ♪ dance with me tonight ♪
- Mm-hmm.

♪ 'Cause I don't want
to break your heart tonight ♪

♪ Oh! ♪

And one more thing...

I love you, Jake Rosati.

What did I do?

Beautiful.

- I'm sorry.
- Save it.

My Ricky chapter is closed.
Consider yourself OOP.

Okay, I-I may be
out of print,

but I'm still available
in limited edition.

Ugh.

Okay, at least for a dance.

How about it?
For old times' sake?

Get in line!

The lady is with me.

♪ I'm thinking about
the only one ♪

I'm pretty sure I love you.

I feel it right here.

It's probably coming from
a little further south.

♪ I'm thinking about
the only one ♪

On your body, not mine.

This is surreal.

- Yep.
- I'm crying to you about Jake.

I'm listening to you
cry to me about Jake.

What does that say about us?

We're weirdos.

I'm weird. You?

You're wonderful.

Hey, this isn't the Matty hour.

Let's focus on you.

You feeling better?

Surprisingly, no.

I'm still...
racking my brain,

trying to figure out what
I could have done different...

better.

Guess I just waited too long
to tell him how I felt.

I can relate.

He'll come to his senses.

I suspect Jake's just trying
to get over his own insecurity.

Once he knows there's
no reason to be insec--

What if there is?

- Is what?
- A reason.

What if he could sense that
I was struggling to fall in love

with him because...

I haven't fallen
out of love with you?

♪ Decisions you do or make ♪

♪ I'm aware
they can haunt you ♪

Where's Jenna?

She's gone.

♪ You're here early ♪

My entire life has been
a series of bad timing.

My conception, my accident,
Jake's affection.

Us.

Us.

Maybe the timing's...

finally right.

And maybe,

finally,
it was time for my life

- to be less complicated.
- ♪ Bring on the fire ♪

♪ 'cause business is cruel ♪

♪ and Sophie's got
somewhere to be ♪

♪ take it out on me ♪

♪ take it out on me ♪

Next on Awkward...

Holy fuck!

Jake, I really need
to talk to you for just--

- He knows everything?
- Everything.

Well, who the hell told him?

Maybe telling Jake
was the wrong thing to do,

but what you and Jenna did
was way worse.

The wheel of pep!

Okay, McKibben,
time to come clean.

Please, don't do this.