Awkward. (2011–2016): Season 1, Episode 5 - Jenna Lives - full transcript

- I'M NOT GONNA HOOK UP
WITH MATTY AGAIN UNTIL WE DTR.

- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
- "DEFINE THE RELATIONSHIP."

- THANKS AGAIN FOR DITCHING
OUT OF THE PARTY WITH ME.

IT WAS THE BEST PART
OF THE NIGHT.

JENNA, I LIKE YOU.

I'M JUST NOT SURE
I'M READY

TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP.

- IN HIGH SCHOOL,
PERCEPTION'S EVERYTHING.

AND BEING DROPPED OFF
BY A PARENT

IS LIKE OWNING
A ROLLING BACKPACK

OR KISSING YOUR GRANDPARENT
ON THE MOUTH.



UNSAVORY.

IN AN ENVIRONMENT WHERE
EVERYONE WAS PLAYING THE ROLE

OF JUDGE AND JURY,

THE ONLY WAY TO SURVIVE
WAS TO ASSERT

SOME KIND OF INDEPENDENCE.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
ALL RIGHT--

I'M GETTING OUT.

- YOU NEED TO BLEND,
AND THEN CHANGE THAT SHIRT.

PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK THAT
WE CAN'T AFFORD NICE THINGS.

HERE.
AND IT'S BACKLESS,

SO YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO
WEAR A BRA.

- NICE. THAT'LL BE
INTERESTING IN GYM

WHEN I HAVE TO RUN THE MILE.

- JENNA, IT WOULD NOT KILL YOU
TO TAKE A RISK.



BE BOLD ONCE IN A WHILE.

- MY MOTHER'S PERCEPTION
OF BEING BOLD

WAS FREE-BOOBIN'.

I'D HAD ENOUGH.

- IF YOU'RE NOT INTO THE SHIRT,

AT LEAST TAKE THESE
SO YOU LOOK HIP.

THEY'RE FAKE.

AND THEY'LL HELP YOU HIDE
YOUR BIG UNIBROW.

- I WANTED AN EXCUSE
TO WALK IN TOGETHER.

BUT WHAT I REALLY NEEDED
WAS AN EXCUSE TO TALK.

MATTY SAID HE WASN'T READY TO BE
IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ANYONE.

- * DON'T STOP THE MUSIC NOW
COME ON *

*

* OH, OH, OH,
OH, OH, OH, OH *

- BUT MAYBE HE JUST DIDN'T WANT
TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.

AND WHY WOULD HE?

I WAS THE SUICIDE GIRL.

[computer keyboard tapping]

[gunshot]

[coach's whistle blowing]

SO THE FRONT SAID
"JENNA LIVES,"

AND THE BACK SAID
"IN TRIBUTE."

THAT'S CLEARLY ABOUT ME,
RIGHT?

- AS CLEAR AS THE COLD SORE
ON VERA HERBERT'S FACE.

I'D SAY IT'S OOZINGLY OBVI.

- I MEAN, CRAP
TO THE [bleep] PILE,

I SAW A GIRL GET OUT
OF MATTY'S TRUCK.

I MEAN, I THINK HE'S HOOKING UP
WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

- YOU'RE LIKE A DAYTIME
TALK SHOW.

- EXCEPT NOBODY'S PREGNANT...
YET.

- ALL THIS HAPPENED
BEFORE THE BELL EVEN RANG.

WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE
ALL THIS EFFED-UP KARMA?

OKAY, ACT TOTALLY NORMAL
AND DON'T LOOK NOW,

BUT UP ON THE RIGHT, SHE'S
THE ONE IN THE BLEACHERS.

- THE WHORE!
- YES, BUT DON'T STARE!

- NOT LOOKING.
- NO IDEA WHO SHE IS.

AH, CRAMP.
- ME EITHER.

I THINK SHE'S A JUNIOR.
AND SHE KINDA LOOKS LIKE YOU.

- YEAH, BUT PRETTIER.
AND COOLER.

WITH BIGGER BOOBS.
SHE'S JENNA PLUS.

- NO WAY.
SHE'S JENNA MINUS!

YOU DON'T TASTE LIKE ASHTRAY,
AND YOU PUT OUT.

- SHE PROBABLY
PUTS OUT TOO.

- BUT SHE'S OLDER, SO THE SEX
IS SUPER DIRTY.

WHAT?

I DON'T MEAN HOT DIRTY,
I MEAN GROSS DIRTY.

YOU KNOW,
LIKE AMATEUR PORN.

- THERE'S THAT GUY
WITH THE SHIRT.

NO WONDER MATTY WANTS TO
KEEP HIS OPTIONS OPEN.

IT'S HARD TO BE SEEN
AS GIRLFRIEND MATERIAL

WITH A LURKER AROUND.

- YOUR SUICIDE STIGMA
IS LIKE THE HERPS.

JUST WHEN YOU THINK IT'S GONE,
IT COMES BACK.

- SO HE GAVE SOMEONE A RIDE
IN HIS TRUCK.

WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?

YOU'RE GETTING ALL WORKED UP
OVER A JAGGOFF.

THE GIRL'S JUST SOME...

CHICK.

- YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M PROBABLY
JUST OVERREACTING.

- IT'S A FRIENDLY HUG.
LIKE THIS.

SEE, TOTES FRIENDLY.

THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON
WITH THIS.

NOTHING BELOW THE NECK.
PLATONIC.

- HEY. YEAH!

- YOU WISH, CRETIN!

- IT'S NOT A FRIENDLY HUG,
IS IT?

- SURRENDER YOUR PAIN
TO THE SUGAR.

- I'M FINE.

IT'S NOT LIKE HE'S
CHEATING ON ME.

WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.

HE CAN GET HPV
FROM WHOEVER HE WANTS.

- SEE YOU LATER.

- I COULDN'T CONTROL
JENNA PLUS

FROM SPREADING HER DISEASE,

BUT I COULD STOP KYLE
FROM SPREADING HIS.

YOU HAVE TO TAKE
THAT SHIRT OFF.

- NO.

- YES. YOU'RE GLORIFYING
THE SUICIDE

I DIDN'T EVEN COMMIT.

- "JENNA LIVES" IS MY BAND.
- REALLY?

YOU HAVE A BAND?

WHAT KIND OF MUSIC
DO YOU PLAY?

- IT'S NOT YOUR STYLE.
- OH, AND YOU KNOW THIS

BECAUSE YOU'RE CLEARLY
OBSESSED WITH ME,

SO GO CHANGE YOUR SHIRT!

- I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU.

PLUS, I KNOW, LIKE,
A HUNDRED JENNAS.

- IT SAYS "IN TRIBUTE."

- IT'S A TRIBUTE BAND.

- MAYBE IT WAS
ALL IN MY HEAD.

I WANTED TO BELIEVE HIM.

BUT EVERYWHERE I WENT...

HE WAS THERE!

WOULD YOU STOP FOLLOWING ME!

- YOU'RE IN THE BOYS'
BATHROOM.

- HEY.

[toilet flushes]

- I HAVE A STALKER.

IT'S THIS GUY NAMED KYLE,
AND HE'S FOLLOWING ME AROUND

MAKING LIGHT OF
A VERY SENSITIVE SITUATION

WITH A VERY INSENSITIVE
T-SHIRT.

I NEED YOU TO MAKE HIM STOP.
I MEAN,

ISN'T THAT, LIKE, A RIGHTS
INFRINGEMENT OR SOMETHING?

- ARE YOU SURE YOU AREN'T BEING

A LITTLE BIT PARANOID?
- NO!

I SEE HIM EVERYWHERE.

I MEAN, THE SHIRT IS
PRETTY BLATANT.

- MAYBE KYLE DESIGNED THAT SHIRT
AS A FAN.

YOU KNOW, MAYBE HE WANTS
TO BE YOUR DAWG.

- MY WHAT?

- I KNOW A LITTLE GIRL

WITH A NAME THAT RHYMES
WITH DALERIE,

AND SHE DIDN'T HAVE
ANY FRIENDS GROWING UP.

AND IT WAS VERY PAINFUL.

- OKAY, ARE YOU SUGGESTING
THAT THIS IS HIS WAY

OF TRYING TO BE MY FRIEND?

- IT'S CERTAINLY POSSIBLE.

- REALLY? 'CAUSE TO ME
IT JUST SEEMS LIKE

HE'D RATHER CUT OFF
A PIECE OF MY HAIR

AND WEAR IT IN A LOCKET
AROUND HIS NECK.

- I THINK THE WORST THING
YOU CAN DO RIGHT NOW

IS GO TO A CRAZY PLACE.

- OKAY, I'M TIRED
OF BEING SEEN

AS THE GIRL WHO TRIED
TO KILL HERSELF.

I DIDN'T.

KYLE'S SHIRT
ONLY REMINDS PEOPLE

THAT I'M STILL THAT GIRL.

AND THEN THEY DON'T WANT
TO BE SEEN WITH ME,

AND THEN THEY DON'T WANT
TO DATE ME.

AND HIS STUPID T-SHIRT
IS KEEPING ME FROM MOVING ON,

NOT TO MENTION,
IT IS IN REALLY BAD TASTE.

- OH, SWEETIE...

I THOUGHT IT WAS A FAN SHIRT.

YOU KNOW WHAT,
I'LL TAKE IT OFF.

I'LL TAKE IT OFF.
I DON'T NEED IT.

I DON'T CARE.
I'LL JUST TAKE IT OFF.

NEVER HAPPENED.

OKAY...

WHERE WERE WE?

- OH, I DON'T KNOW.

- THANKS FOR SAVING ME
SOME TOTS, KEL.

WHAT WOULD I DO
WITHOUT YOU?

- McKIBBS, NICE HAT TRICK
YESTERDAY, MAN.

- OH, THANKS, DUDE.

- OH, HEY.
I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE.

I'M SO HUNGRY.

YOU HUNGRY?
- STARVED.

- I COULD EAT, LIKE,
FOUR SANDWICHES OR SOMETHING.

MAYBE SOME SOUP.
MMM.

- WELL, I THINK THEY HAVE
CHICKEN TORTILLA.

- SO LISTEN, I KNOW WE NEVER
TALKED ABOUT IT,

BUT YOU KNOW I DIDN'T TRY
TO KILL MYSELF, RIGHT?

MISUNDERSTANDING.

- OKAY.

UH...JELL-O?

- MMM. HELLO.

UH...

YOUR MOUTH IS SAYING OKAY,
BUT YOUR EYES ARE SAYING,

"SAVE ME FROM THIS LUNATIC."

WHICH I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND
BECAUSE I'M RAMBLING

AND SOUNDING LIKE
A WHACK JOB.

BUT JUST SO YOU KNOW,
I WAS HAVING A BAD DAY,

AND I SLIPPED--
I HAD AN ACCIDENT.

NORMAL PEOPLE HAVE ACCIDENTS.

AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I HAD
BECAUSE I'M PERFECTLY NORMAL.

[forced laugh]

OH, WHAT WAS I SAYING?

- YOU'RE--
YOU'RE TOTALLY NORMAL.

- YES.
- I GOT IT.

I'LL SEE YA.
- OKAY.

MATTY DITCHED ME
TO BRING THAT CHICK A SANDWICH?

I FOOLED AROUND WITH THE GUY
AT LEAST EIGHT TIMES,

AND HE NEVER BOUGHT ME
A SANDWICH.

HE JUST BOUGHT HER A SANDWICH.
WE HAVE TO FOLLOW THEM.

- WHO?

- YOUR FACE IS ALL RED,
AND YOU HAVE CRAZY EYES.

DID YOU FEED THE RABID SQUIRRELS
IN THE QUAD?

- LISTEN, THOSE SHIRTS
ARE SPREADING,

AND I KNOW MATTY'S
SEEN THEM.

DID YOU SEE THOSE PEOPLE
WEARING THEM?

I JUST NEED TO FIND OUT
IF THEY'RE TOGETHER.

- YOU'RE GOING
TO A DARK PLACE, J.

STAY WITH US.

- I JUST NEED CONCRETE PROOF
THAT THEY'RE DATING.

I KNEW IT.

YOU'RE TOTALLY CASHING IN
ON MY FAUX SUICIDE ATTEMPT.

THAT IS ILLEGAL.
I COULD HAVE YOU ARRESTED!

YOU'RE STALKING ME.
ADMIT IT.

I SAW YOU AT LEAST
FIVE TIMES LAST PERIOD.

- I'M AN OFFICE AID.

- MM. YEAH?
TAKE THE DAMN SHIRT OFF--NOW.

YOU ARE RUINING MY LIFE.

- THOSE ARE MINE.

- TAKE IT OFF.
- NO.

- TAKE IT...OFF.

- NO.
- FINE.

I WILL.
JUST STOP IT, OKAY?

PEOPLE ARE GETTING
THE WRONG IDEA.

THEY THINK I'M CRAZY, OKAY?
JUST STOP IT!

STOP STALKING ME,
STOP WITH THESE STUPID T-SHIRTS!

JUST STOP IT!
JUST STOP IT! JUST STOP IT!

STOP IT!
- YOU'RE CRAZY.

- DOES THIS REALLY
WARRANT DETENTION?

- IF YOU WERE 18,

IT COULD WARRANT
SOME TIME IN THE SLAMMER.

SORRY I COULDN'T GIVE YOU
SPECIAL TREATMENT.

I MEAN, I COULD HAVE,

BUT THERE WERE SO MANY
WITNESSES.

- I SEE SOME NEW FACES...

MIXED IN WITH THE OLD.

TO THE ROOKIES--

WE'RE ON THE HONOR SYSTEM
HERE.

NOW, I'LL BE BACK
TO CHECK ON YOU,

BUT YOU WON'T KNOW WHEN.

SO YOU BEST
BE ON YOUR BEST.

LIKE BUSY LITTLE
WORKER BEES--

ZZZ--

YOU WILL BE WORKING ON YOUR
HOMEWORK HONEY POT,

AND I WILL BE IN MY OFFICE

ATTENDING TO MY PILES

AND PILES OF WORK.

SOMETIMES IT FEELS LIKE
I HAVE DETENTION TOO.

- WE HAVE EXACTLY TWO HOURS.

STARTING NOW.
[snaps]

- TWO HOURS FOR, UH,
FOR WHAT?

- VALERIE'S NAP.
WE'RE HEADING TO GIUSEPPE'S.

- GUESS JENNA PLUS
WAS A REGULAR IN DETENTION.

AND THE LEADER
AMONG THE REBEL HERD.

MAYBE MATTY THOUGHT
BEING BAD...WAS GOOD.

COME ON, NEWBIE.

FROM THE SMALL BIRD TATTOO
ON HER ANKLE

TO THE SIMPLE CARMEX SHE WORE
INSTEAD OF LIP GLOSS,

EVERYTHING ABOUT
JENNA PLUS WAS COOL.

BITCH.

- SO WHAT ARE YOU IN
DETENTION FOR, WONDER BOY?

- I WAS CAUGHT HOLDING
THE HOSE AT THE BONFIRE.

- KINKY.
- [laughs] YEAH.

- AND YOUR CRIME,
HAMILTON?

- OH, JUST A LITTLE...

[ahem]
MISUNDERSTANDING.

AT LUNCH.
WHAT ARE YOU IN FOR?

- I'M A DETENTION
REWARDS CARD MEMBER.

TODAY I BLEW OFF HISTORY

'CAUSE I WAS ON THE PHONE HAVING
A MELTDOWN WITH THIS GUY.

- WAS SHE TALKING ABOUT MATTY,

OR WAS I HAVING
A PARANOIA STROKE?

[cell phone tune]

- SPEAK OF THE DEVIL.

WHAT?

NO!

WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

- CAN I BUM A SMOKE?

- SURE.

- I WONDERED
IF MATTY LIKED SMOKERS.

AND IF SO,
COULD I FAKE A PRO?

- OKAY, THEN WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS TIME

TO THINK ABOUT IT
AND CALL ME BACK?

- [coughs]

EVERYTHING OKAY?

- YEAH. IT'S JUST MY EX.

WE'VE BEEN ON A BREAK,

AND WE'RE IN THE PROCESS
OF MAYBE GETTING BACK TOGETHER.

- DID THAT MEAN
I WAS MATTY'S REBOUND?

BREAKS ARE HARD.

SOMEONE ALWAYS HOOKS UP
WITH ANOTHER PERSON,

MAYBE EVEN FALLS FOR THEM.

THINK HE'S INTO SOMEONE ELSE?

- I THOUGHT SO.
BUT NOW I'M NOT SO SURE.

WHEN WE'RE TOGETHER, IT'S...
IT'S AMAZING.

IT'S LIKE...

THE WORLD FALLS AWAY...
THEN THE NEXT DAY,

HE'S INDIFFERENT,
HE DOESN'T CALL ME.

HE DOESN'T EVEN WANT
TO BE SEEN WITH ME.

SO STARTED TO WONDER

IF MAYBE I'M IMAGINING
ALL THE GOOD STUFF.

- JENNA PLUS AND I MIGHT HAVE
BEEN FROM DIFFERENT PLANETS,

BUT HER MATTY HEARTBREAK
WAS THE SAME.

[cell phone tune]

THERE IT WAS.

THE ANSWER I WAS CHASING.

I COULDN'T LIVE IN THE SAFETY
OF DENIAL ANYMORE.

SHE WAS WITH MATTY.
HE WAS WITH HER.

AND I WAS WITH CANCER.

- I'M GONNA LET HIM SWEAT IT
FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

THANKS FOR LISTENING.

ARE YOU OKAY?

WHATEVER THE MISUNDERSTANDING
WAS TODAY,

IT'LL BLOW OVER.

NOTHING'S EVER
AS BAD AS IT SEEMS.

HERE.

TAKE MY LAST SMOKE.
I'M GONNA GRAB ANOTHER PACK.

- AS MUCH AS I WANTED
TO HATE ON JENNA PLUS,

I COULDN'T.

THE BITCH WAS DECENT.

MAYBE EVEN SWEET.

AND IT MADE ME
REALLY WANT TO KILL MYSELF.

- I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU WERE A SMOKER.

- I'M NOT.

- WELL, I HEAR LUNG CANCER
DOES MAKE YOUR ASS LOOK HUGE.

- WELL, I'M HAVING
A CRAPPY DAY.

EVERYONE THINKS
I TRIED TO KILL MYSELF,

AND THERE'S A LAME GUY
SELLING T-SHIRTS

KEEPING THE STUPID STORY
ALIVE.

- I DON'T THINK
YOU TRIED TO KILL YOURSELF.

- REALLY?
- NO.

YOU'RE NOT THE TYPE.

WELL, UNLESS YOU KEEP SMOKING.

- AND THERE'S A GUY...

- OH. MYSTERIOUS.

- I REALLY LIKE HIM,
BUT HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND.

- WHO IS IT?

- I CAN'T SAY.

- OH. SO I'D KNOW HIM.

- NO COMMENT.

- AW, COME ON.

DOES THIS GUY EVEN KNOW
THAT YOU LIKE HIM?

- I'D SAY IT'S PRETTY CLEAR.

I MEAN...
HE'S FUNNY AND HE'S COOL,

AND EVERYBODY LIKES HIM,

WHICH IS PART OF THE PROBLEM.

BUT I FEEL LIKE I SEE
WHO HE REALLY IS,

AND HE GETS ME.

- YEAH.

- BUT WE'RE NOT
ON THE SAME LEVEL,

AND HE CAN NEVER BE
WITH A FREAK LIKE ME, SO...

IT'S KINDA HOPELESS.

- MAYBE YOU'RE MISJUDGING
THE SITUATION,

AND THIS GUY
REALLY DOES LIKE YOU...

JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

- NAPTIME'S ALMOST OVER.

[door slams]

- GOOD DAY TODAY!

I SNUCK BY EARLIER

AND CHECKED ON YOUR PROGRESS,

AND YOU WERE ALL BUSY
WORKING AWAY.

AS ALWAYS,
I APPRECIATE YOUR RESPECT

OF THE HONOR SYSTEM.

YOU MAKE MY JOB
A PLEASURE.

YOU'RE ALL DISMISSED.

- HEY, MOM, IT'S ME.

UH...WHEN YOUR TAN IS DRY,
COME PICK ME UP.

- JENNA.

I, UM...
I JUST WANTED TO SAY I, UH...

OKAY.

YOU KNOW THAT GUY THAT
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT?

- YES.

- UM, I JUST WANT TO THROW IN
MY TWO CENTS

AND SAY THAT I'M SURE
YOU'RE ON HIS RADAR.

I MEAN, HE'D BE LUCKY--

WELL, I--I MEAN, ANYONE WOULD BE
LUCKY TO BE WITH YOU.

- WELL, THANK YOU
FOR THE PITY PARTY.

BUT I THINK I'LL LIVE.

THE T-SHIRTS SAY SO.

- [chuckles]

NO, UM, SERIOUSLY.

I'LL BET YOU ANYTHING IF THIS
GUY DIDN'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND

THAT HE'D BE ALL OVER YOU.

- WOULD HE NOW?
- YEAH.

HE WOULD.

- IT WAS NICE TO HEAR.

IF JAKE COULD SEE ME
IN A POSITIVE LIGHT,

MAYBE OTHER PEOPLE COULD TOO.

THANK YOU.

- DON'T STOP ON ACCOUNT OF ME.

- SHE'S ACTING OUT.

WE GAVE HER TOO MUCH ROPE.

SHE'S NEVER HAD DETENTION
BEFORE.

THERE HAVE TO BE CONSEQUENCES.

- ISN'T DETENTION
A CONSEQUENCE?

- SHE NEEDS PARENTAL
PUNISHING TOO.

BUT NOTHING TOO HARSH.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

SHOULD WE SEND HER TO BED
WITHOUT DESSERT?

- SO THAT SHE WAKES UP SKINNIER?

NO, THAT'S NOT A PUNISHMENT,
THAT'S A REWARD.

- WE CAN'T LET HER THINK
WE'RE TAKING THIS LIGHTLY.

- HOW DO WE DO THIS?

- WE START BY PRESENTING
A UNIFIED FRONT.

- YOUR BEHAVIOR AT SCHOOL TODAY
WAS UNACCEPTABLE.

GETTING PHYSICAL WITH SOMEONE
IS NEVER THE ANSWER.

WE'RE...

DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.

- I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T MEAN TO FLIP OUT.

I WAS JUST TRYING
TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF.

I MEAN, MOM TOLD ME
TO TAKE MORE RISKS.

- YOU TOLD HER
TO TAKE MORE RISKS?

- IN THE CONTEXT
OF WHAT SHE WAS WEARING.

- WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

- I TOLD HER TO WEAR
A SHIRT WITHOUT A BRA.

- WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER THAT?

OUR DAUGHTER IS 15!

SHE DOESN'T NEED
TO SKIP THE BRA!

- IT WAS A BACKLESS SHIRT!

- DO YOU GUYS WANT ME
TO COME BACK IN TEN MINUTES?

both: 15!

- EVERYTHING THAT ONCE WAS
SIMPLE WAS NOW COMPLICATED.

MATTY'S BEST FRIEND
HAD KISSED ME.

AND MATTY DIDN'T WANT ME
TO BE HIS GIRLFRIEND.

'CAUSE HE ALREADY HAD ONE.

AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANTED
HER TO DISAPPEAR,

SHE WOULDN'T.

SHE WAS REAL
AND SHE HAD A NAME.

OLIVIA.

AS EXPECTED,
IT WAS PRETTIER THAN MINE.

[cell phone tune]

HEY.

- SO HOW WAS JUVIE?

- NOTHING LIKE I THOUGHT
IT WOULD BE.

- THAT'S PRETTY MUCH
THE THEME OF THE DAY.

BRACE YOURSELF, J.

I CSI'D YOUR BARNACLE.

CHECK OUT HIS PAGE.

YOU'RE NOT THE OBJECT
OF HIS AFFECTION.

SEE, HIS HAND IS ON
MISS BURNDAHL'S KNEE.

UM, HURL.

- [sighs]

HE IS AN OFFICE AID.

I AM SUCH A JERK.

KYLE'S NOT A STALKER,
JENNA PLUS IS NICE.

WHAT'S NEXT?

- SO YOU ATTACKED
AN INNOCENT OFFICE AID.

WE'RE ALL SPUN OUT
ON THE CRAZY CAR.

IT HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US.

I MEAN, I SHAME-SPIRAL,
LIKE, WEEKLY.

NO BIGS.

CALL ME IF YOU WANT
TO UGLY-CRY.

- [sighs]

TURNS OUT I HAD BEEN SMOKING
THE EMOTIONAL CRACK PIPE

AND I NEEDED TO TAKE A DRASTIC
12 STEPS BACK TO RECOVERY.

I HAD ALREADY ACKNOWLEDGED
I HAD A PROBLEM.

SO I DECIDED TO SKIP
THE MIDDLE STEPS

AND GO STRAIGHT
TO NUMBER NINE--

MAKING AMENDS.

- I'M NOT WEARING THE SHIRT!

- I KNOW! I'M SORRY!

LISTEN, I MADE A HUGE MISTAKE

CALLING YOU OUT
IN FRONT OF EVERYONE.

- YOU'RE SURPRISINGLY STRONG.

- I FEEL REALLY BAD
ABOUT ALL OF THIS,

AND I'D LIKE TO MAKE IT
UP TO YOU.

CAN I BUY A SHIRT
TO SUPPORT YOUR BAND?

- YOU CAN JUST HAVE IT.

- NO, LET ME PAY FOR IT,
I INSIST.

THIS WHOLE THING
IS JUST RIDICULOUS.

I MEAN, I JUST KEPT
SEEING YOU EVERYWHERE.

AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE
A...CREEPER.

TURNS OUT, I AM.

- OKAY.

- WE COOL?

- YEAH.

HEY!

YOU SHOULD HEAR MY BAND
PLAY SOMETIME.

WE KILL IT.

- YEAH, I'D LOVE TO.

[hinges squeak]

[comically ominous music]

*

- COME SIT WITH ME!

- COOL SPECS.

- THEY'RE NOT REAL
OR ANYTHING.

I LIKE TO WEAR THEM SO THAT
PEOPLE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY.

- FUNNY, EVEN JENNA PLUS
WAS CONCERNED

WITH HOW PEOPLE PERCEIVED HER.

- HEY!

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU TWO
KNEW EACH OTHER.

- BUSTED.

- WE'RE DETENTION BUDDIES.

I NEED RANCH.

- YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE THE TYPE
THAT WOULD BE IN DETENTION.

- MAYBE YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT TYPE I AM.

SO, UM...

HOW DO YOU GUYS
KNOW EACH OTHER?

- WHO, LIV?

SHE'S KINDA MY GIRLFRIEND.

IN-LAW.

SHE AND MY BROTHER HAVE BEEN
OFF AND ON FOR A WHILE.

I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON.

HEY.

WEIRD.

SO YOU TWO KINDA LOOK ALIKE.

- [laughs]

- YEAH.

- NAH, SHE'S WAY PRETTIER
THAN ME.

- IT WAS OUR FIRST LUNCH
TOGETHER.

AND I REALIZED IT WASN'T
MY STIGMA OR ANOTHER GIRL

KEEPING ME FROM MATTY.

IT WAS HOW I SAW MYSELF.