Arabian Nights (2000): Season 1, Episode 1 - Episode #1.1 - full transcript

In the twinkling of an eye.

More, more!!

More, more!!

Later... Magic is very exhausting,
and I am 542 years old.

Oh...
You don't look a day over 200.

Yes, I'm still as bad as ever I was.

We'll continue after I've got my rest.

Thank you for not telling your friend
the Demon.

He's not my friend,
he's my husband.

He keeps me in that box
because he's so jealous.

I saved you from him...



And now you must make love to me,
while my husband sleeps.

If you don't, I'll wake him up,
and he'll rip your head off.

Oh, not again, Sayyidi.

Giafar, I had that dream again.

The Demon's wife,
she tried to kill me, so I killed her.

You've had it now for five years...

Ever since your late wife
tried to do the same thing.

- I murdered her...
- It was an accident, Sayyidi.

It was an accident!

Allah is just...
you're free of her Sayyidi.

I'll never be free of her
she haunts me still.

Don't let her.

Don't you forget, I have to take
a wife by the next full moon,

Or the kingdom will be given
to my dear brother.



May he rot in hell!

Your father wanted you to marry.

I can't take another wife,
she'll try to kill me too. They all will!

You must.

You lose the kingdom unless
you marry as quickly as possible.

I know what it means even
the Demon was betrayed.

The dream tells me
all wives are treacherous.

No, no, you just had a
bad experience, Sayyidi.

There's only one way to deal with wives,
they have to be executed.

Well, I'm sure we've all felt like that.

I will marry. There will be a
wedding and a wedding night.

But in the morning,
I'll have my wife executed.

I'll kill her before she kills me.

She can't be a princess of the blood,
her death would cause problems.

Pick me a woman from the Harem, Giafar.

Someone bright and happy,
and with no thought for the future.

And in secret...
now send for the Chief Executioner.

He was loaded with riches and honours...
but that was not the end of the story.

After Douban was beheaded,
the King licked his fingers

And turned to the page
in the dead man's book.

He stared at the words,
and then slumped forward

- dead!
The pages of the book had been poisoned

So that the King, wetting his finger,
had executed himself.

Here again, mistress.
That's the sixth time this week.

These people sit for hours just
listening... it's a miracle.

People need stories more than bread itself. They tell us how to live, and why.

Sorry I'm late, father.

This is my daughter, Scheherazade.
She's my strong right arm,

You may speak freely in front of her.
How is the Sultan?

The Sultan is being eaten
by the worm of madness.

It reminds me a little
of the case of Gilgamesh

The king of Urak when his friend,
the grand warrior...

Can you cure the Sultan?

No... Only Allah can do that.

- How was Gilgamesh cured?
- It was a young woman who did it.

No one knows how... a complete amateur.
Beginner's luck.

That sort of thing can be really,
really distressing.

For an experienced
professional like myself.

When did Schahriar become so ill?

When I played with him as a child
in the palace he was always so happy.

Everybody loved him.

Madness creeps in unseen
and floods the soul.

You're no help!

Patients often say that,
but what do they know.

Should I get a second opinion?

Why not?
I can come back tomorrow.

I didn't know Schahriar was this ill.

I've been trying to keep it from everybody.

You look terrible father.

Oh, it's only natural. I have to deal
with the worst kind of madman...

a madman with power!

You understand what is needed?

I know my job Sayyidi. You wish your bride to
be executed the morning after the wedding.

Early.

There are certain procedural problems, Sayyidi...
as I will be executing her after the wedding

It means she will be Sultana,

Who by tradition cannot
be hung or beheaded.

Details... details!

Never fear, Sayyidi, where there's a will,
there's a way.

- I can strangle her.
- That's what I want.

But, I can't use hemp rope...

not on a royal throat.
- Must I be crossed at every turn?

But there's no objection to silk! A silk
rope would fulfill all legal requirements...

rely on me, Sayyidi.

They haven't seen
each other for years...

That's enough, girls.

The Sultan's going to kill us!

- Who told you that?
- My mother.

She got it from the cook...

who got it straight from the Chief
Executioner's Assistant, it's a secret.

And her mother's never wrong.
I heard it from a handmaid

who heard it from one of the guards.

He's going to marry one of us.

In the morning after the wedding he
is going to have the bride executed.

He's mad, isn't he?

And it won't stop there.

He'll get a taste for it
and kill us all!

I'm sure it's just a rumor.

Don't worry, I'll talk to my father.

- Father, I must speak with you.
- What are you doing here, child?

Put some clothes on Father, it's urgent.

I blame your late lamented mother...
it's all her fault.

Please be quick, Father, or they'll say
you're meeting women in the steam room.

The women in the Harem are frightened
that it won't stop at one girl...

The Sultan may get a
taste for killing them.

If Schahriar wasn't the Sultan, he'd be
locked away till the madness passed.

He was such a loving boy...

We used to climb his father's
favorite peach tree.

One day I fell and cut myself.

He bound up the wound.

Oh, what am I going to do child?
I can't go through with this.

I can't pick a poor girl from the Harem
knowing I'm condemning her to death!

I may have a way out for you, father.

I'll marry Sultan Schahriar myself.

I won't let you sacrifice yourself for me.

I'm not doing it for you, father...

I'm not even doing it
to save the girls in the Harem...

I'm doing it for Schahriar and myself.

I love him.

No, you love the boy he was,
not the man he is.

That boy is still there in him.

You'd have to dig very,
very deep to find him...

He's changed completely!

It's not just betrayal
by his wife and brother...

absolute power has eaten
his soul. I know him...

you think you can change him,
but you can't. No one can.

- I don't believe that.
- Scheherazade, listen to me, listen!

You are all I have.
I beg you, I beg you! Don't do this!

I can save him from himself...
I don't know how,

But I've made up my mind.
I know I can do it.

Daughter, when you walk
out onto that balcony,

You will be married and you will have
signed your own death certificate.

If you love me,
please, please, please...

please, don't do this.
- I know what I'm doing, father.

You don't.
You have no idea what you're doing.

- Sayyidi, your brother,
wishes to offer his blessings.
- May they choke him.

He wants to be reconciled...
it would be good, Sayyidi, for peace.

Think of the people.
Show them you're brothers again.

I hope you have better luck
this time, brother.

Your late wife loved me from the first.

How will we know when Sultan's ready?

He'll call...

I think...
pink will suit the Sultana.

You have such good taste, Chief.

Sayyidi, do you remember me?

From when we were children.

We played together here in the palace...
then I went away.

I don't remember anything
about my childhood.

What is it, Sayyidi?

I don't trust you.

There's something going
on I don't know about.

Your Giafar's daughter,
yet he let you...

Marry me.

Oh, I dream too much...

Forty nights...

Can't sleep, so I dream.

My father always takes a glass of wine
and a biscuit before going to bed.

This isn't a night
when a man is supposed to sleep.

There.

Is something the matter?

That biscuit has sesame seeds...
I don't like sesame seeds...

- Did I say something funny?
- No.

It's just that "sesame"
remind me of this wonderful story...

Would you like to hear it?

I don't like stories.

You will this one.
It's about Ali Baba and the forty thieves.

Forty thieves?

Forty nights of dreaming,
and now Forty Thieves...

That's strange!

Yes, but no stranger than the story itself.

You see, Ali Baba was a poor young man
who lived outside Damascus.

His best friend had a hump,
four legs, and very big teeth.

Saffron was one of the wisest camels
in all Syria.

Ali Baba's only family was
an older brother, Cassim.

I know Saffron, I know.

Cassim!

Wake up

It's time to get up. Come on.

Unlike his young brother,
Cassim was so lazy.

I told you I don't like stories.

A master storyteller once told me,

The audience must be hooked
in the first moments,

Otherwise you've lost them.

I'm lost.

That's because I haven't told you
about Black, Black Coda.

At the time the kingdom was
being ravaged by savage gangs.

Black Coda led the most murderous of them.

A monster.

Black.... Coda.

No one was safe.

What's he got to do with Ali Baba?

He made Ali Baba rich and famous.

No caravan could travel without fear.

They never knew when or where
Black Coda would strike next.

He was a master of disguise.

Meanwhile, Ali Baba was collecting
firewood to sell in the local market.

He was a really good-hearted young man.

It's a slow way to make a fortune, Saffron

And I've so many good ideas
for making money...

Like my scheme for watering plum trees
with alcohol to grow stewed plums.

I don't care what you think, Saffron,
I think it's a good idea.

You think that's trouble, do you Saffron?

I think you're right.

Saffron's warning saved Ali Baba.

Animals can be cleverer than their masters.

And you can trust them.

Open Sesame!

Down!

That must be Black Coda.

What do you think of that?

Sesame... that's the seeds that Mother used
to make those biscuits with, aren't they?

Why would it be...

Sesame?

Open Sesame!

Down boys!

Down?

Open Sesame!

Saffron!

Saffron!

We're rich!

Have you ever seen anything like it?

Only in your wildest dreams!
Well, not in your dreams, in mine.

It's raining.

Mother, bring in the washing.

No it's not raining, your mother's
been dead for five years. Get up!

- What's for breakfast?
- Fresh air.

Why are you sleeping on
the edge of the bed?

So I can just drop off.

Well, get up...
I've got something to show you.

We're going to have to move house...

In case the robbers find
out who was in their cave.

- I want my share.
- Of course. I don't want it all for myself.

- What half-and-half?
- Half-and-half.

- I'm going to the cave to get my share.
- No, it could be dangerous.

I can take care of myself.

If you must go, take Saffron,
she knows the way.

She'll see you don't get
into any trouble.

Saffron's a camel!

"You don't think I need a camel
to look after me, do you?"

Both Ali Baba and Saffron nodded.

There was no question
in their minds...

that Cassim certainly needed
someone to look after him.

Why was Cassim any
different from Ali Baba?

Ali had something Cassim never had...

a good heart.

You think a good heart can protect people?

Have you ever known anyone
with a good heart?

No.

Well, anyway, with Saffron's help,
Cassim found the robber's cave.

Open!

What is it?

Open.. Open..

Ali Baba has given Cassin two biscuit
to remind him of the password.

"Open sesame!"

Down boys! Down!

I must get Saffron.

Open.. Open!

How was it, then?
Open...

Open.. Open..

Open..
Open.. Open corn!

Open barley!

Open Sesame!

Open Sesame...

That was it. Open Sesame...

Meanwhile, whilst Cassim
was getting himself Killed...

Ali Baba had hired himself
a young serving girl, Morgiana...
to help him now he had money.

What was this Morgiana like?

Some said she was beautiful.

But she was certainly clever...
and very independent.

She sounds like you.

Like me?

Oh, no, she wasn't like me.
Not like me at all!

That's everything, sir.

Saffron...

Where's my brother?

Where's Cassim?

That should scare off anyone nosing about.

- Do you think he was with anybody else?
- Nah! They's still have been with him.

And get rid of those two
dragons, they're useless.

Oh...
Oh, poor Cassim!

I should have tried harder to stop him.

Oh no, Don't blame yourself.

Come, we should leave as soon as possible.

No...
No, we must take him with us.

Is that wise?

When the robbers come back
and see the body's gone,

They'll know Cassim had
friends or family...

They might try and find you, and do
to you what they did to your brother.

I know you're right Morgiana,
but he must have a decent burial.

We can't... we can't leave him
for the vultures to pick on his bones.

He's my brother.

Cassim had a wonderful funeral. It was
the talk of the city for weeks after.

Cassim must have been very popular.
He had many friends.

- I hope we gave complete satisfaction
- Very good job sir.

The "Damascus Mourners Association"
has a reputation second to none.

Did you see how Mustaffa
threw himself into the grave?

You only get that with
the "Damascus Mourners".

We not only provide all
the funeral arrangements,

But the weeping and gnashing of teeth too.

Remember us, if you have
more deaths in the family.

Somebody else knows.

I made a mistake. I have to correct it.

We had been robbed chief jewels
and gold coins are missing.

What should we do?

How much?

Only a couple of sackfuls.

That means there was only two
or three thieves at most.

We'll have to search
for them in Damascus now.

But where do we look?

They took the body for burial,
so we find out

who's come into money recently
and could afford a rich funeral.

That's very clever, Chief...
I would never've thought of that.

No "nor me."

Spare me your "nor mes."

We go into the city in ones
and twos and in disguise,

Or they'll hang us on sight.

Black Coda's men drifted
inconspicuously into the city.

Robbers find nothing wrong in robbery,
except when it happens to them.

- I feel... sad.
- But don't you like your new house?

Of course I do.

I just wish Cassim were here
to enjoy it with me. I miss him.

It's natural...
he was your brother.

Everyone should have good fortune...

But it just much better,

If there's someone to enjoy it with.

Coda's men were hot on the trail.

They dug up Cassim's body
to make sure they had the right man.

This belonged to the late Cassim,
brother of Ali Baba,

Who has just come into money.

You know where this Ali Baba lives?

An expensive villa on a hill
overlooking the City Park.

That's a particularly desirable residence,
with a view of...

I don't want to buy it!

I just want to kill him and
everyone else in the house.

How many of us do you want for the job?

All of us...
we don't know how many we'll have to kill.

How're forty of us going
to get past the guards?

I know how... I want Ali Baba and his brood
slaughtered by this time tomorrow night!

And so the evil Black Coda
walked up to the city gates...

ready to slaughter Ali Baba
and everyone in his house...

What's the matter?

Nothing, Sayyidi.

What happened to Ali and Morgiana?
What happened next...

and did Black Coda
kill them... and.. and..

And... don't you know?

Of course I know, but I'm tired.

It's already morning.

It can't be morning, morning never
comes for me, it's always night.

I've lost track of time.

So... you won't go on?

Yes... yes..
But storytelling's best done at night...

at least for me...

I mean, it's hard to create the right
atmosphere with the sun shining...

Don't you think?

It's a trick!
A trick to trick me!!

No!!
No!!!

- What is it, Sayyidi?
- I want...

you.. to meet..
Somebody!

Who are these men?

Friends, Sultana.

Please, stay calm.

Stay back!
Sayyidi!

Sayyidi!
Sayyidi!

No...
No!!

- Please, stay calm.
- Stay back!

Sayyidi!

Sayyidi, no..

You will finish the story
of Ali Baba.. tomorrow night.

I sit in the bazaar, telling stories,
but if the audience isn't interested in

what I'm saying, it walks away.

But if your audience isn't interested...
you're dead.

I thought it would be easy but it isn't.
I almost lost it before I got started.

I've told you before,
the first moments are vital.

I paused at a good point... with the thieves
sneaking into Damascus to kill Ali Baba.

Sneaking in how?
In what?

- A wagon.
- Too ordinary.

It has to be something more exotic...
your starting your story again...

you have to hook your audience...
again.

- How?
- I was walking last night past...

the Great Mosque
in the street of Sighs...

exactly an hour after sundown,

when I came face to face...
with Death.

Had he come for you?

You see...
you're hooked!

He's still insane and he'll kill you...

Now I've made arrangements for your escape.

It's too late... if I fled he'd punish you
and then pick the poor girls in the Harem.

So you'll stay and risk your life.

I promised I'd help... if I can make him
listen to my stories, maybe he'll change.

You don't sound as certain as you were.

I'm not.

As I was saying, Black Coda brought
his whole gang into Damascus,

in a wagon, to murder Ali Baba.

But it was no ordinary wagon.

The wagon was carrying
an amount of stone jars.

How did Black Coda explain the jars?

What's this, old man?

Forty jars of lamp oil
for the royal palace.

Forty jars of oil?

That's clever...
that's very clever...

obviously Black Coda had a black
heart but a very bright brain.

He had that, alright.

Naturally, Ali had no idea
of the danger he was in.

He didn't tremble...
when he should have trembled.

How're we going to protect him, Saffron?
He's a dreamer!

What about all those schemes
for making money?

He needs someone to look after him...

Yeah... I love him...

but does he love me?

Your a camel,
what do you know about love?

I'm sorry...

Your a wise camel, aren't you?

Turn to right to Ali Baba's house.

I thought you'd like some
hot lemon and nutmeg, sir.

Thank you, Morgiana...

I think it's time you
started calling me Ali.

Salute this.

I'll stay up late tonight
thinking of money-making schemes.

Why sir?

Ali?

Why think up such schemes?
You're rich.

I know, but that was luck...
I'm not going to stay lucky all my life.

I want to know
I can survive if my luck turns.

I'll be back in two hours when it's quiet...
then we'll kill everyone in the house.

It will be a pleasure, chief!

There's a wagon parked
in the street outside.

It's a merchant, lady,
with jars of oil for the palace...

he asked permission to leave his
wagon there for a few hours.

Did you check him closely?

Yes lady.

- How much did he give you?
- Nothing, lady, nothing!

Isn't there any more oil in the house?

We have to buy some tomorrow.

Didn't you say that merchant
had some jars of oil?

Yes.

Hm, he won't mind us talking
a little for the night.

We'll pay him in the morning.

Life often turns on such small things
as a flickering oil lamp...

Praise be to Allah... it can't be
long before the killing starts.

Morgiana, this man's got a marvelous idea

for breeding termites with wooden legs.

- I think I should invest...
- They've come, Ali!

Who?

The murderers you stole the money from.

I've got an idea...

follow me.

Chief?

- Chief? Is that you? Chief?
- Any moment now.

- Hear that men? Any moment now!
- Excellent.

The Black Coda's men.

Black Coda's men hung like ripe fruit.

It was all over.

Well, not quite.

Ali Baba threw a magnificent party,

to celebrate the defeat of
Black Coda and his gang.

The chief attraction was the most
famous entertainer in all of lslam.

- The Jokes of man Gibtail?
- It day to celebrate,

because with the help of my good friend,
Morgiana,

Black Coda's gang have been
crushed like.. a.. beetles.

Ask if Morgiana will dance for you,
Ali Baba,

she's a beautiful dancer!

I didn't know that, Morgiana...
I can't dance a step.

I'll show you.

Morgiana!

That's not funny. Not funny at all.

Morgiana, what have you done?

They all kill!
Women are born to hell!

They kill without reason!

She had her reasons.

I... I saw..
The tattoo when I offered him wine.

Oh, what would I do without you?

What happened to Ali Baba and Morgiana?

Ali Baba finally had one good idea,

He married Morgiana.

He wasn't clever but he was lucky.

I suppose, he needed someone like
Morgiana's to make sure he made the most of it.

Something like that.

It could've been a man who befriended him.

Yes, but she proved to be
a very good wife, Sayyidi.

I suppose it can happen, but not likely.

Just because you had a
bad experience once...

Bad? Bad! Do you know what she tried
to do to me? And I loved her!

Do you still love her?

She rots down, deep down,
deep down, six feet down!

Death doesn't change it.

She tried to kill me.

It doesn't matter...
if you love somebody enough,

you can forgive them anything!

Is that the end of the story?

No.. no.. no..

Fasil and his wife, Safil,

from Constantinople,
were at Ali Baba's wedding.

Fasil had designed
Morgiana's wedding dress.

He was one of the best tailors in the East,

but both he and his wife always looked like
they'd been stuffed by a good taxidermist.

At the wedding they met an extraordinary
friend they hadn't seen for years...

Who?

A hunchback.
His name was... Bacbac...

Good name, Bacbac.

Bacbac liked it too,

in fact, Bacbac liked most things
about himself, even his hump,

without it, he may not have become
the Sultan's favorite Jester.

I've always supported my family,
they've never wanted for anything,

apart from uncle Abdulah, he's wanted for
bigamy and murder, in that order.

Anyway, back in Constantinople,

Fasil invited Bacbac to supper...
and Bacbac never turned down a free meal.

You know Prince Sinbad?

Oh, he is so ugly even starvation
won't look him in the face!

I tell you, I tell you...
no tide would take him out...

when he eats a banana,
he eats it sideways.

And his wife! Oh! Her face is all
dried and wrinkled like a prune!

She's the sort of woman
you have to look at twice.

The first time,
you don't believe it!

At her wedding, everyone kissed the groom!

Bacbac?

- I think he's dead.
- Dead? He can't be dead.

You're fooling us, aren't you, Bacbac?
Another one of your jokes!

He must have suffocated.

Probably a bone, a fish bone
got stuck in his throat.

Oh.. poor Bacbac.
We must tell the authorities.

They'll blame us.

- It was an accident!
- They'll still blame us,

he was the Sultan's favorite...

"There they go, the people whom
killed poor little Bacbac."

- We'll lose all our customers!
- Reputation shattered...

credit destroyed, income lost.
What're we going to do?

We could take him
to that old physician next door.

It's too late for a physician,
he needs an undertaker.

I mean leave him there...

Let someone else take the blame...

that sounds good!

Calm!
Come on!

He is heavy!

- We'll leave him here.
- Good.

Come on. Let's go.

Who's that?

- Can I help you?
- We came to see Dr. Ezra...

for our friend, if it's not too late.

It's never too late with Dr. Ezra.

- You wanna bet?
- I'll get him.

Your friend doesn't look too good.

- Let's go.
- Come on, hurry.

Ezra, we have a customer.

- Another penniless vagrant?
- No... he's paid.

He's outside on the landing.

Show him to me, my dear,
before he gets away!

- He's waiting on the stairs.
- Be careful!

I can't see where he.... ahh!

Ezra... Ezra,
Ezra, speak to me!

You must wear your glasses, Ezra?

How do you feel?

- I don't know.
- You don't know, you're a physician!

So I'm a physician...

so what else you want you should tell me?

Sir... your friends said
you don't feel very well.

I'm sure my husband can help you.

- No, he can't.
- Of course you can.

No, I don't think so.
He's dead.

- The fall down the stairs!
- A terrible accident!

It's worse than that.

He comes here for medical treatment
and he ends up dead!

What will this do to your reputation, Ezra?

He looks familiar.

Oh... The Sultan's Jester!

- Alas, poor Bacbac.- I knew him well.
- We're doomed!

We'll be blamed...
we're foreigners!

Help me carry him upstairs...
hurry!

It's amazing how quickly people
can improvise when they have to...

the Ezra's had to take a gamble,

forgetting that gambling is only a way
of getting nothing... for something.

There's nothing worse than
being alone in a strange city.

Lift his arms up,
so he'll slide down easier.

It's as if he doesn't
like what we're doing.

Nonsense! He'd see the funny side of it.

Oh, Buddha, send me a sign...
say I'm not forsaken in a foreign land.

Robbers! Thieves!

Ha!

My hands are lethal!

Dead.

I told you about my hands!

I know you...

the famous Bacbac...
the Sultan's Jester...

Why you come down my chimney?

It's a joke to set the whole town laughing,

well, the laugh's on you,
Jester Bacbac...

No, the laugh's on me...

they'll say I murdered you.
I'll be hanged.

Think of something, Hi-Ching,
think of something.

Help! Murder! I'm being attacked!

You'll get no money from me!

You'll get not a penny from me...

Guards, guards, seize this man...

he just tried to kill me!

- Instead, you killed him.
- I... I did... splendid!

You're drunk.

- This is Bacbac...
- Drunk?

The Sultan's Jester.

- Bacbac?
- And you killed him.

Why should I kill him,
we haven't even been introduced?

That is for a judge to decide.

And when he has, we'll hang you!

The trial of Jerome Gribbin
was the social event of the season.

The judge in the case
was the venerable Judge Zadic.

Judge Zadic was totally incompetent,

but being a judge,
nobody had noticed.

which I suggest is death,
death by hanging.

Why did you kill him?

I thought he was trying to rob me.

Bacbac rob you?

Forty years administering justice...

worst excuse I ever heard!

- I made a mistake.
- You certainly did...

all Constantinople will miss
poor Bacbac...

we will never see the like of him again.
A fellow of infinite jest...

"infinite jest," that's a good one,

write that down, clerk,
before I forget it.

Bacbac lightened our lives...

he gave us laughter,
rich and overflowing...

laughter from the heart.
A heart as big as he was small.

We knew him, we loved him,
we laughed with him,

we'll remember him all our days.

I sentence you to hang.

Assassin!

No....
No, no, no, no.

- No, no, please! No.
- Who is this Chinese person?

I killed the poor hunchback.
I stuffed him in the alcove.

No! No!

I killed poor Bacbac, and dropped
him down Hi-Ching's chimney.

No! I killed poor Bacbac.

- I don't understand...
- I killed him...

my hands are lethal!
- I tripped over him in the dark!

He's very short-sighted.
You can't hang a man for that!

It was a fishbone!

I'm still the best tailor
in Constantinople!

- My head's splitting...
- Order in the Court! Order! Order!

I'll have a lamb shish-kebab!

Your Majesty.

Who killed my funny man Jester Bacbac?

I did!

Who do I hang, Sayyidi?

Nobody.

It was an accident!

Besides being my Jester,
Master Bacbac was my friend,

and if I knew him right
he would've appreciated,

the manner of his death,
it was his final jest,

dear Bacbac didn't have to
be alive to be funny,

even dead, he made us laugh!

Is that the end of the story?

Not quite...
as they were walking away they saw...

It's a different story!

It's the best one yet,
it's extraordinary...

- full of excitement and thrills and...
- Don't trick me again!

Once you start I want to know how it ends!

There's something...
devilish in there.

I see...
demons in them!

Our Mullahs say,
every good story has a moral.

What's the moral of Bacbac's death?

Faisal, Dr. Ezra and the others learned to
take responsibility for their actions...

we all should.

But if they had, Bacbac wouldn't have
fulfilled his destiny to make people laugh,

even when he was dead.

That's true, stories're less simple than
we think they are...

this new story for instance...

No! No! No!
No! No!

What's the matter, Sayyidi?
What can I do for you?

I just missed killing you, and you ask
if there's something you can do for me?

I'm concerned for you.

Be concerned about yourself, Scheherazade.

I'm concerned about you, my love.

Why?

I love you.

Why?

You need me.

It's going badly...
The Sultan's missed another chance...

his brother wouldn't have.
Schehzenan... never hesitated,

he was the Executioner's friend.

There're some who think the
wrong brother is the Sultan.

You spoke before about meeting death.

I didn't meet him, I passed
him on the Street of Sighs...

I told a close friend what had happened,

and he said he'd seen Death too in the street
and Death had given him a terrible look...

he was so frightened,

he was leaving for Samara that night...

I went to see death to find
out what was going on...

And?

Another time, perhaps.. you must learn
how to leave your audience in suspense...

As the crowd were leaving the courtroom...

the most famous magician
in Africa, Mustappa...

passed by on his
way to Samarkand.

He was a charismatic man with
piercing eyes a seductive voice...

and a manner that would freeze
friends at twenty paces.

When he came into a room
the mice jumped on chairs...

but he isn't the hero of this story.

Who is then?

Eh... Sinbad...

mmmm... Aladdin.
No...

Cheat... It's all a cheat.

That race was fixed!

No question...
anyone could see that, Aladdin!

Honest men like us go for
a day at the races...

and get cheated blind out
of our hard earned money.

- It just shows honesty doesn't pay.
- Let's get back to work.

Sorry, excuse me.

My purse!
I've been robbed!

- What's the matter, sir?
- That young rogue...

the one who bumped
into me picked my pocket!

I saw which way he went.
This way follow me!

Stop thief!

Who's in the coach?

Let's find out.

Who's that?

Princess Zubaïda,
the Caliph's daughter.

- Come on. Let's get out of here.
- I'm in love!

Come on!

There they are.

Where did you come from?

From the other side of the world... Africa.

- What do you want with me?
- Stay calm, Aladdin...

do I look like I'm with
the Caliph's guards?

I'm always calm.
How do you know my name?

- I was a friend of your late father.
- I didn't know he had any friends.

Oh, very few... just me.

Your father was so crooked...

he could hide in the shadow of a corkscrew.

You did know him!

- Do you want to become rich?
- Yes, but quick!

It's the best way.

Business? Shady business?

Shady... shifty... shadowy...

but profitable.

What do I have to do?

First of all, I have
to check your suitability...

Good. Meet me tomorrow outside
the city gates at dawn.

Here's a small token of my good faith.

That's the first thing I did, Mother.

It never hurts to get a second
opinion. They taste right.

He says he knew your father...
did you believe him?

No, I believed his money.

He must want something big from you,

twenty gold coins is a mighty
expensive introduction,

he could have four men killed
for that kind of money.

There's only nineteen coins here.

Are you accusing your poor old mother?

I'm accusing you of palming a piece.

Did you see me?

No, I know by the weight.

Oh, I thought my hands
had lost their cunning!

Your pick-pocketing hands
I'll never do that Mother...

you're still the best!

You know how to flatter a body,
you young rogue!

Take care tomorrow morning,
when you meet Mustappa!

Trust me Mother.

That's what you're dear father
used to say, but nobody ever did!

And so Aladdin and Mustappa
left Samarkand.

He didn't trust Mustappa,
but when there was money involved...

Aladdin was prepared to take a few risks.

I don't want to boast,
but I've never met anyone

who can live with me in
a straight fight, magic to magic...

So what do want me for if
you're so powerful?

All power has its limits...

I want you to retrieve an object for me...

I can't get it myself, for reasons
too complicated to get into...

its to do with the rules of magic...

they're tiresome, but they must be obeyed.

So why pick me?

You didn't believe I was a
friend of your father's?

Not for a moment... so why me?

I saw larceny in your soul.

What do you want me to do?

I want you to go into a tomb...

You'll find an old lamp there.
I want you to bring it to me.

What tomb?

- There.
- How much?

- We'll discuss that when you get back.
- No, we discuss it now, or I don't go.

Fifty gold pieces.

Please... don't insult me,
and don't ask me to trust you.

I don't even trust my own shadow...
Two hundred!

Done!
Here's half.

You gave me to easily.
I should have asked for more.

You do so remind me of me
when I was young!

Here now take this ring...
rub it if you get into any kind of trouble.

Trouble? What sort of trouble?

Two hundred is not enough!

A deal is a deal! Don't try and betray me...
if you do, I swear by Hector's feathers,

you'll never see your wedding day.

Who's Hector?

My pet raven and my best friend.

Aladdin didn't know what kind of
trouble he was getting into...

if he had, he wouldn't have
taken the two hundred...

on the other hand, he probably would...

Go on... go on!

Aladdin - have you got the lamp?

Hand it up to me... it'll be
easier for you to get out.

- It's no trouble, I can get up myself.
- Pass it up to me... there's a good boy.

I'm not a good boy!

Give it to me or you will
make me very angry.

I'm angry already! Do you think I'm
gullible enough to fall for that old trick?

You get the lamp and ride off
without paying what you owe me...

It's an insult to my
professional integrity.

You get your lamp when I get my gold!

- You think I'd ride off?
- Yes! You've got those shifty eyes!

- You cheap street scum!
- I resent the word "cheap"

I was going to raise you up,
now I cast you down into the depths!

You want the lamp?
Keep it, damn you!

Rot in darkness... Ingrate!

Mustappa... Musatappa... Mustappa...

why, why, why must you always
lose your temper? Why?

Now you lost the lamp!

Plenty more wonders
in the world for me to steal...

Iet's go home.

This was a crisis. And in a crisis, there's
nothing more effective than magic...

Who're you?

Omar Khayyam!
I'm the Genie of the Ring... who else?

Look... Stamp of authenticity!
But before I answer anymore questions,

what color was my smoke?

Was it blue? If it was blue, it means
that I am melancholy and sanguine.

That means that I need more "me" time.

What do you want?
I have enemies, I have a migraine...

What do you think I want?

I want out!

I, I, I, I, I, I,
always about you, what about me?

Get me out of here, take me home,
put me out, I'm on fire.

Allah! Allah! We're going to die!
I don't want to die!

Come on, pull yourself together!

Please spare me, I'm only seven
hundred and nineteen years old!

I was going to repent,
I was going on a diet, oh, please...

Get us out of here!

Have you ever heard of the
magic word please?

Because I work for you doesn't mean

Are we understood?

Ouh.. The light! The light!
I cannot see!

I am blind! It's too bright!

My body is aching! I shall go home.
Salam.

I don't understand.

Why would Mustappa pick the best rogue in
all Samarkand... to get this piece of junk?

- It's demeaning!
- It must be worth something or he
wouldn't have gone to all that trouble.

Hmmm... You're right, son.
Maybe it's a priceless antique!

Don't just stand there
like a leaning tower of jelly!

- Talk to him!
- Why me?

I'm just a poor, weak widow-woman!
It's your lamp!

Good evening.

- Friend?
- Speak up insignificant mortal lowly one!

- Who are you?
- Who am I?

Who am I?!
Have you not heard of me?

I am the Lamp Genie.
The Lamp Genie.

Wishes, avarice, dreams, power,
premature and violent death...

Well... scratch the last one.

You're like the Genie of the Ring?

Like the Genie of the Ring???
I who oppose the will of Heaven?

- Never! His powers are as nothing
as compared to mine!

- Are you two related?
- No. Maybe. I don't know.
The tests were inconclusive.

- What can you do?
- What can I do?

What can I do?
I don't know.

How about anything, for starters?

And that was the beginning of it...

Aladdin, a rogue, a son of a rogue,
from a family of rogues...

found he could have everything
he ever wanted. All he had to do was ask.

So? So?
So what did he ask for?

- We can save that for tomorrow night.
- I want to know now!

Not tomorrow night!
It's your fault!

You made the story so gripping with your
wit and your charm and... and your beauty.

What's my beauty got to do
with story-telling?

Because if I lose interest for a moment,
I see your face and I can't leave..

Please tell me what happened to Aladdin!

- Sayyidi, Tomorrow night.
- I order you!

It wouldn't be the same story
if I was ordered to tell it!

- It's all tricks!
- Remember what happened...

to Mustappa when he lost his temper.

- He lost his wonderful lamp!
- Tell me.

Tomorrow night.

Chief! Now!

Just wait till tomorrow night.
Tomorrow night. Tomorrow night!