Angel (1999–2004): Season 4, Episode 7 - Apocalypse, Nowish - full transcript

ANGEL: No.
LORNE: Why?

- No.
- Why?

I said, no.

I said, why? Let's meet in the middle
with a "Why no?"

It's too soon.

But she got her memory back.

Aren't you a weensy curious
if Cordy remembers anything...

...about her little stint
as Miss Higher Power?

Maybe something
about the thingamabad...

...Wolfram and Hart sucked out
of my noggin?

We need to give her time before we
come at her with a million questions.



How about one? One's good.

In a couple of days,
when she's more herself.

Chime in anytime.

- Love to.
- Really.

- We got a case.
- Need some backup?

No. Woman out in Hancock Park's
hearing spookies in her pipes.

I don't know whether to bring
my axe or a plunger.

See? Worst thing we got going on
is a haunted toilet.

So let's give Cordy a little space.

It's not like the world's gonna end
this second.

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

Chocodiles and some other stuff.

What?

Thought you might be hungry.



You want something else? I could...

No.

These are great.

What are you watching?

Some old movie. Pod People...

...or Mutant Pod Mushrooms,
or something.

I don't know. I can't remember.

I mean I don't remember,
because I was a kid when I saw it...

...so it's a little in the foggy,
but natural fog.

Don't worry.

I'm not gonna turn into
amnesia action-figure Cordy again.

She wasn't so bad.

Yeah. A real hoot, too,
with the panicking and the screaming...

...and running around like a nut.

Mm.

I love these.

Yeah, I know.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Not just for the snacky goodness.

Thank you for...

God, thanks for everything.

I don't know what I would have
done without you, Connor.

Panic, scream, nut.

Probably.

You should rest.

I'm okay.

You haven't slept since you came back.

I know.

Every time I close my eyes, I...

What?

See it.

Something...

...horrible.

Moving, deep down...

...clawing its way up.
- It's just a dream.

I can taste the blood of the people it's
going to kill, smell the burning flesh.

It's okay. You're safe with me.

No one's safe.

Don't you understand that?

It's coming,
and no one can stop it.

I wanna warn Angel,
but the words won't come out.

Why can't I tell him?

I feel it.

The thing in my dreams.

It's real...

...and it's almost here.

DEMON:
I know.

What is it? Are you all right?

Cordy!

[SOBBING]

Apocalypse, Nowish

Snakes?

Uh-huh.

And they came out of your what?

Okay, okay. Well, did they get up there
themselves, or was this part of a...?

You know, a thing?

No, I'm not judging.

- Do we fight snakes?
- Only if they're giant.

Or demons or giant demons.

Are they giant demon snakes?

Well, unless this guy's 30 feet tall, I'm
thinking they're of the garden variety.

Oh.

They could still be demonic.

They making any kind of
weird demon-y sounds?

The noises are horrible.
The thumping, the groaning.

It's impossible to sleep at night.

How long has this been going on?

- A week, maybe.
FRED: Good.

If it's a haunting, the longer a specter
is in the area...

...the harder it is to convince them
to leave.

Casper's dealing
with the big boys now.

We're very persuasive.

Anything you can do
about that terrible room.

I'll be in the kitchen.

You ready?

Is no an acceptable answer?

In this business, always.

[GUNN WHISTLES]

Man, look at this place.

- A family of four could live in here.
- With room for Uncle Earl.

Man, marble countertops,
whirlpool tub, bidet.

It's the kind of place I imagine
us moving into one day.

Yeah.

Well, I'm not saying tomorrow.

- I know, l...
- Just be nice one day, that's all.

Charles...

[DEEP ROARING]
[CLANKING]

Okay, that's not the bidet.

Where's it coming from?

Um, everywhere?

Maybe we should've brought a priest.

Or some consecrated Drano.

I think it stopped.

[GLASS CRASHING]
[SCREAMING]

[MICE SQUEALING]

These aren't ghosts!
These definitely aren't ghosts!

Well, they're gonna be!

It won't open!

GUNN:
Get them off me! Get them off me!

FRED:
You're okay! You're okay!

Um, you might wanna look into
an exterminator.

- Or just burn the place down.
- Either way.

LILAH:
Hard day at the office?

I've had worse.

LILAH: What happened?
- Bugs.

LILAH: Giant?
- Swarm.

Why are you dressed like that?

Isn't this what you like?
Big brain and a tight little...

- Lilah!
- Forget about that evil witch.

Let's talk about me.

I'm good, and I'm pure.
And science turns me on.

And one day, if I pray hard enough
and eat all my vegetables...

...I just might have hips.

Are you finished?

Did it turn you on?

Watching her up there in front
of all those brainiacs...

...knowing she was the smartest one
in the room?

- Her theories deserve attention.
- Just her theories?

I saw the way you looked at her.

Oh, come on. Do you think I
care about your little crush?

Moon all you want
over the Texas Twig...

...because I know whose bed you'll be
crawling into at the end of the day.

Or the middle of it.

[MOANING]

You think you know me?

Better than she ever will.

Leave them on.

Nasty, pink-nosed bastards,
I can still feel them crawling on me.

I'm gonna take a long bath and scrub
till my skin stops twitching.

We have bubbles?

I was kind of looking forward
to a quiet soak alone.

Oh.

Yeah, okay.

It's just, the tub's not that big, and...

Forget it. We'll squeeze in.

No, no, you go ahead.
I'll grab one later.

Can we not do this?

You mean, have a meaningful
conversation...

...the way that two people
who love each other are supposed to?

- Fine. We'll do this.
- Fred, what do you want from me?

- Nothing.
- Yeah, you've made that clear.

That's not what I meant.

You sure?

We don't talk.
We sleep on opposite sides of the bed.

We haven't even touched each other
since...

Since we murdered Professor Seidel.

- No, since I did.
- For me.

I couldn't let you carry that.

It wasn't your choice.

Fred, it's not who you are.
It isn't in your heart.

But it's in yours?

It is now.

I'm sorry.

Fred!

[PHONE RINGING]

No. No, that certainly doesn't
sound normal for a boy his age.

Look, we'll send someone out
as soon as we can.

Just don't poke him.

ANGEL:
Hey, how'd it go?

- Where's Fred?
- Bad. Out. I got it.

LORNE:
Bless you and all your parts.

Angel Investigations. Uh-huh.

And what is the nature
of your manifestation?

Business is really humming.

Word of mouth, I guess.
Got around that I'm back.

You think I should keep these
alphabetical or rearrange them...

...by how much damage they inflict?
- Damage.

Nomenclature goes out the portal
when hacking's afoot.

Still, good to know what you're using.

What if I'm fighting a Glurgg,
and I ask for a Khopesh to finish him?

- What would you throw me?
- A towel.

Glurggs are 90 percent pus.

Yeah, not speaking of sticky fluids...

...maybe we should get some help
around the office.

A certain somebody with a good
understanding of higher dimensions...

...could tell me what got Hoovered
out of my head.

Um, name starts with a C.

- Connor.
- No, I was leaning more...

...towards a perky love muffin, but...
Oh.

Hey.

Hey.

It's okay. The spell wore off.

Thanks for not letting me hurt Cordy.

Well, I don't know.

She probably would've staked you.

She's pretty tough.

Yeah, she is.

She's staying with me now.

- You know that, right?
- Yeah. That's good.

She needs a place she can feel safe.

Give her a chance to work things out.

Few days, everything will be
the way it was.

You should talk to her.

Oh, hallelujah.

No, it's not a good time, Connor,
after everything she's been through.

- The last thing she needs is me...
- Dad?

Please.

I'm gonna kill him.

He's just worried about you.

We all are.

That the royal "we" or the populace?

Always wanted to be a prince.

I hear you gotta be born into it.

How do you do that?

What?

Make everything feel like
it's not spiraling apart.

ANGEL:
You all right?

Getting there.

- The way you left the hotel...
CORDELIA: I know.

- Did I do something or...?
- Oh, Angel.

I love you.

I always will.

You know that.

I don't suppose we can stop there?

I wish I could...

...more than anything...

...but I can't.

When I got my memory back,
everything came rushing in.

Sunnydale, moving to Los Angeles,
meeting you again.

I wanted to tell you...

...but it was just too much.

Tell me what?

What I remembered when
I was a higher being.

I remember seeing you.

Your past, when you were Angelus.

I never tried to hide who I was
or what I've done.

You already knew.

Knowing's different than living it.

When I was up there,
I could look back...

...and see everything you ever did
as Angelus.

More than see.

I felt it.

Not just their fear and pain.

I felt you...

...and how much you enjoyed
making them suffer.

I love you, Angel.

But I can't be with you.

It's just too soon.

Maybe if we just give it a little time.

[HEAVY BREATHING]
[DEEP ROARING]

Cordy.

It's coming.

It's coming now.

You still have your visions.

I thought they weren't
supposed to hurt anymore.

CORDELIA:
This wasn't normal.

If that word actually applies to
anything that ever happens to me.

The visions are usually
like a lawn sprinkler.

This was like Niagara.

- We should let her rest.
- No, I'm okay.

ANGEL:
What else can you tell me?

Big, powerful.

Clawing its way up through the bowels
of the earth to slaughter us all.

Yeah, that pretty much covers it.

Did you see anything
that could give us a location?

No, just a big beastie.

It's coming, Angel, and it won't stop.

Not until we're all...

It won't stop.

He's right. You should probably
get some sleep.

Yeah, because impending doom,
almost as good as warm milk.

Well, whatever's coming,
I'll figure out a way to stop it.

It'll be too late. I can feel it.

There's something... I don't know.

I think I know more about this thing...

...or I knew more when I was all
high-and-mighty, I just can't get at it.

- Maybe if Lorne read you again.
- You think he would...

...after what happened the first time?
- I can hold him down.

Angel, we need to know more.

I need to know.

I'm sorry.

I know, but we're
pretty swamped right now.

[PHONES RINGING]

If Snowball hasn't tried to eat your spine
yet, hit her with catnip till we get there.

No, I don't think that much mucus
is ever a good sign.

Uh-huh. Please. Please, yeah.

Describe it in detail.

Hey, uh, this isn't letting up.

How about rustling up
some adorable reinforcements?

I don't know where she is.

That's where the rustling comes in.

If Fred wanted to be here, she would.

Uh, yeah, that sounds horrible.
Hold, please.

You two okay?

Ask her that. Maybe she'll talk to you.

Angel Investigations. Hold, please.

Hey, I don't know what's going on
between cupcake and her icing...

...but you know how she feels
about you.

It doesn't take horns and a beautiful
singing voice to be able to read that.

It's just, it's been hard
since the thing with her professor.

Yeah, well, being stuck
in Pylea's pretty crappy.

But being sent there on purpose
by someone you trust?

Hey, at least Dr. Ego got a taste
of his own portal.

Yeah. He got what he deserved,
didn't he?

[DOOR BANGS]

It's a sparrow.

It slammed right into the glass.

- Close the door.
- Might not be dead.

Close it!

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

I'm guessing this isn't a good sign.

Yeah, as harbingers go, not so much.

LILAH:
A 300-percent increase?

In the last hour? Uh-huh.

Oh, you think?
Well, don't. Just shut up.

Get me an incident report
cross-referenced by region...

...socioeconomic backgrounds
and species.

And get Gavin up here. Somebody's
muscling in on our apocalypse...

...and that's not gonna happen
while...

Let me get back to you.

ANGEL: Close the door.
- How did you get in here?

Vampire detectors, my ass.

Well, here we are, all nice and cozy.

Let's talk about, hmm, gee,
let me guess, Lorne.

How is he doing? Still green?

I told you we would have
a conversation.

Swell, but I'm having a bit of a day,
so let's say we skip the usual two-step.

You threaten me, I threaten you.
Yada yada, yawn.

Jump directly to throwing you out
on your thick, meaty head...

...because you know what?
You're not getting anything out of me.

Didn't think I would. But Gavin...

...he was more accommodating.

Couldn't you have tortured him
a little bit more?

Wanted to, but he wouldn't stop talking
long enough for me to get into it.

I have a cure for that.

Vindict on your own time.
I'm kind of on the clock here.

What did he tell you?

You're trying to decipher what
you took out of Lorne's head.

Hundreds of psychics,
probing and prodding.

Well, not quite that many now, because
every time they peel back a layer...

...their brains end up
decorating the walls.

You should see the cleaning bill.
That is terrifying.

Anything you got on what's coming,
now's a good time.

Not big on sharing.

You think I'm joking.

Not unless you got a sense of humor
to go with that soul.

Look, you got it right
from the weasel's mouth.

Whatever Lorne gleaned from
reading Wonder Girl, it's protected.

Try and unlock it, kablooey.

Thanks for stopping by.

You're trying to hide it,
but I can smell it on you.

Chanel?

Fear.

Well, you are very imposing
in this light.

You're not afraid of me, Lilah.

You're afraid of what's coming.

Maybe we can help each other, huh?

The enemy of my enemy...

Can kiss my ass too.

You wanna play hero,
go find another sandbox.

Normally, this would be the part
where I'd make a grand threat.

But thanks to Gavin...

LILAH:
Like he knows anything.

That's the point.

This thing caught you by surprise too.

You had no idea it was coming.

So I'm supposed to throw in
with Mr. Goody...

...because the great unknown
has me shaking in my pumps?

It's a win-win for you, Lilah.

You help me, I stop it, Wolfram and Hart
makes you employee of the month...

...for protecting everything they set
into motion the last 1000 years.

You help me, and I don't stop it...

...well, the only way that's gonna
happen is if this thing kills me.

And if that's the way it goes...

...you win again.

So you can keep playing it hard...

...or you can play it smart.

It's up to you.

Must be genetic.

- What?
- Sneaking up on people.

Your dad's an expert.

I was just making a sweep.
Where you going?

Been inside all day.

Thought I'd take a walk, clear the
cobwebs, recharge the chargeables.

Okay, stop with the look.

- I'm getting a stronger feeling.
- About the vision?

Yeah. Flashes, images,
tugging at me, pulling.

- Where?
CORDELIA: Don't know.

Maybe where it's gonna
jack-in-the-box.

- You were gonna face it by yourself?
- It's all right. I was a higher being.

CONNOR:
Was.

You're not anymore.

No, I'm not.

I remember wanting
to come back home.

To be able to touch, to feel.

To be human again.

- You are.
- But I can't remember how.

Am I on vacation?

Did I go cosmic AWOL?

Did I do something to piss off the
powers that be and get kicked out?

Why am I here?

Because you're important.

Yeah, the world really
stopped turning without me.

Well, you're important to me.

Guess the sneaking's not the only thing
you got from Angel.

Getting pretty good with saying
the right words too.

Complete sentences.

I've been working on it.

Maybe you're right.

Maybe I was sent back because I'm
important or needed for this.

To stop whatever's about to happen.

I have to find out if that's why I'm here.

CONNOR: And I have to go with you.
- No, it's dangerous.

That's why I'm coming.

CONNOR: Know where you're going?
CORDELIA: Exactly? No.

But for the first time since I've been
back, I feel like I have a purpose.

Like a reason for being here.

Before, all I felt was empty...

...like I was waiting
for my life to start.

I know how that feels.

Not knowing why you're here...

...what your place is in this world.

It's called being 18.

If you make it past 21,
things get a lot better.

They already have.

You really are getting
awfully good with words.

What is it?

This place...

...I've been here before.

- In your vision?
- No, I...

Oh, my God.

Darla.

My mother.

She died here.

Connor, this is
where you were born.

CORDELIA:
Connor!

No!

Stay away from her!

[LAUGHS]

[GROANS]

If you see Fred, could you have her
call me? Charles Gunn, two N's.

Yes, that's my real name.
Just please have her call me.

It might take a couple of days.
You're fifth on the bleeding walls list.

Spritz it with a little 409.
We'll get back to you.

- Hey, no word yet?
- Nobody's seen her.

Maybe she ducked and covered when
our feathered friends went kamikaze.

You good here? I'm gonna
drive around, see if I can...

I'm just gonna drive.

Let the machine work
its mechanical magic.

Come on.
I'll hang my head out the window...

...see if I can pick up her vibe.
- You can do that?

No, but it sounds comforting,
and I could use the air.

WESLEY:
It is a bit ripe in here.

- I'd suggest opening a window, but...
- Fred's not here.

- Didn't ask.
- Didn't have to.

- Since you brought it up, where is she?
- Not your business.

Call me kooky, but maybe we
could save the three rounds...

...until after the Chuck Heston
plague-a-thon ends.

You've noticed an increase
in paranormal activity.

You stepped in some on your way in.

Birds, rats, blood. The Ghostbuster lines
have been ringing off the hook.

I've been tracking similar reports.

- Maybe if we pool our data...
- Go pool yourself.

I'm gonna find my girlfriend.

ANGEL:
No, you're not.

If we don't stop what's coming, it won't
matter where Fred is or any of us.

That's everything Wolfram and Hart
could decipher...

...from what they took out of Lorne.
- They just handed these over?

- Lilah, she can be very giving.
GUNN: You trust her on this?

ANGEL: No, but she has an interest
in stopping the end of the world...

...before it ruins Wolfram and Hart's
end of the world...

- What's the plan?
ANGEL: You're holding it.

Figure out what this means,
then do something large and violent.

I see you've given it
considerable thought.

So all this came out of my head?
No wonder it made me greener.

If Wolfram and Hart hadn't extracted it,
you'd be a paler shade of dead.

Yeah, well, remind me to send them
a fruit basket.

[PHONE RINGS]

Saved by the continuous bell.

- You've been logging the calls?
- Every last squishy one.

Grab a map, start marking locations.
See if they're concentrated in one area.

Whatever's happening, whatever Cordy's
seeing, the answers are in these pages.

We need to figure this out.

- We'll never figure this out.
- We have to keep trying.

Normally, I'd agree,
but this is a waste of time.

- It's all we have.
WESLEY: Something's missing.

Bits and pieces of glyphs, archaic
languages, symbols, all jumbled together.

Do you recognize any of them?

Um, "heat, fallen, shrine, flesh."

- None of it makes sense.
- We gotta keep at it till it does.

- We should take a step back.
ANGEL: We don't have time.

Cordy said whatever's happening,
it's going down now.

You should've addressed this earlier.

We could sift through this muddle
from now till doomsday...

...whether that's tomorrow
or 1000 years from now.

Wait. Go back.

The last sheet, flip it back.

What is it?

- I don't see anything.
- It's because you're looking too close.

Okay.

So, what the hell is it?

The Eye of Fire.

Ancient alchemical symbol for fire.

And destruction.

You had me at "fire."

LORNE:
Um, boys?

I hate to be the little demon
that cried "apocalypse nowish," but...

I'll give you one more,
and then I am cutting you off.

Oh, sorry, I can pay for the next one.

It's not the free refills
that I'm worried about.

It's you vibrating into another
dimension after a 10th cup.

Nobody wants that.

Why don't you call him?
You've been sitting here all day.

He's probably worried sick.

Don't know what I'd say.

I think hello would probably do it.

I've seen the way he looks at you
when you come in here.

That man would do anything for you.

- I know.
WAITRESS: So cheer up.

Whatever's going on, as long as
you've got love, it can't be that bad.

Get away from the window!

I gotta go. I've gotta stop it.

Yeah. Getting yourself killed
should really slow that thing down.

Oh, God.

I think you broke a couple of ribs.

CONNOR:
I've never been broken.

Not even in Quor-toth.
I didn't think I could be.

You're hurt because of me.

Because I thought maybe I still had
some grand higher purpose.

That me being here could actually...

...make a difference.

Now I know better.

All you know is that
that thing can hurt you.

And if it tries again...

...I will find a way to kill it.

ANGEL:
That's it.

- What?
- The focal point of the disturbances.

Whatever's coming,
that's where we'll find it.

I know that area. The Kimball Building's
there. They did a retro on it.

Put a club up on the roof.
The Sky Temple or something.

Yeah, yeah, I've heard of it.
A watering hole for the tragically hip.

Actors, models,
all the hot mamas and yamas.

A shrine of the flesh.

So who's thirsty?

Let's do it.

Hey, I know location's everything...

...but maybe we should hold off
on the down payment...

...till we know what we're dealing with
or how to stop it.

If it's alive, we kill it.
If it's not, we bury it.

You in?

Ooh, uh, I'm gonna need a bigger arrow.

[GUN COCKS]

ANGEL: You might wanna hold
the gloat, chuckles.

We're just getting started.

[GROANING IN PAIN]

Do you really think she's safe with him?

No!

[YELLS]

[LABORED BREATHING]

[THUNDER ROLLING]

CONNOR:
What's happening?

CORDELIA:
I don't know.

It's him, isn't it?

It's that thing.

We don't know that.

I should have tried harder.

- I should have stopped it.
- It was too strong.

This isn't your fault.

What if it is?

What if that thing is...?

It chose the place where I was born.

- Is that why it's here? Because of me?
- No.

I was never supposed to happen.

The child of two vampires. What if...?

Connor, it's not you.

You don't know that.

Yes, I do.

In my heart.

It's not you, baby.

It's not you.

Not you.

Why did you...?

Because I don't think it matters
anymore.

I know how you feel about me, Connor.

When I think about what you've...

You never had a childhood...

...or a family or friends...

...or anything that's real.

And if this is the end...

...I want you to have something that is.

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