American Masters (1985–…): Season 25, Episode 7 - Woody Allen: A Documentary - full transcript

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As A New York Filmmaker

That It's Actually Come
As Quite A Shock

To Find Him Making Films

In England Or In Spain,
But The Truth Is

He's Still
The Same Filmmaker.

I Mean, He Was
A Metropolitan Filmmaker

And He's Become

A Cosmopolitan Filmmaker.

You Know, He's Still
Woody Allen,

But He's Just Changed
-Politans.

Insdorf: The Inspiration
Of London For "Match Point,"



Of Barcelona For
"Vicky Cristina Barcelona,"

Of Paris For
"Midnight In The Paris" --

And His Next Film
Will Be Set In Rome --

I Think These Are Providing
A Wonderful Way

For Woody Allen To Recharge
His Cinematic Batteries.

For Example, We Think We'Ve Seen
Everything Of Paris Onscreen,

Probably, By Now,
And Maybe We Have,

But, In "Midnight In Paris,"
It's The Nocturnal City

That Obviously Animates
Not Only The Character Gil,

But Woody Allen'S
Imagination.

It's Those Winding
Dark Streets,

This Geographical
Or Spatial Dislocation

That Creates The Time Warp In
"Midnight In Paris."

In Other Words,
It Comes From The Place



That, Suddenly, We'Re
Transported To The 1920s.

Oh, Hi,
Mr. Hemingway.

The Assignment Was
To Take The Hill.

There Were Four Of Us --
Five, If You Counted Vicente,

But He Had Lost His Hand
When A Grenade Went Off

And Couldn'T Fight As He
Could When I First Met Him

And He Was Young And Brave
And The Hill Was Soggy

From Days Of Rain And It
Sloped Down Toward A Road

And There Were Many German
Soldiers On The Road

And The Idea Was To Aim
For The First Group And,

If Our Aim Was True,
We Could Delay Them.

Were You Scared?

Of What?

Getting Killed.

[ Scoff ]

You'Ll Never Write Well
If You Fear Dying.

Do You?

Yeah, I Do.

I'd Say
It's Probably

My Greatest Fear,
Actually.

Well, It's Something
All Men Before You

Have Done,
All Men Will Do.

I Know, I Know.

Have You Ever Made Love
To A Truly Great Woman?

Actually, My Fiancee
Is Pret-Ty Sexy.

And When You
Make Love To Her,

You Feel True
And Beautiful Passion

And You, For At Least
That Moment,

Lose Your Fear
Of Death.

No, That
Doesn't Happen.

Insdorf: The Very
Geography Of The World

Is Inspiring Woody Allen
In This Phase Of His Career,

Much Like New York City Inspired
His First 25, 30 Years.

He Said, You Know,
One Of The Good Things

About Leaving New York
Is That He Shot

Just About Every Street
Corner That He Could.

Lax: He Came To The Point
Where, Suddenly,

It Became More Difficult
To Make Films In New York

Because They're
So Expensive To Do

And He Was Getting Money
To Go Abroad To Do It.

But I Think, In The End,
The Films Are The Films,

The Stories Are
The Stories.

So, Instead Of From Long Island,
People Came From London.

Aronson: I Forgot To Tell You
That Sidney Zion Died.

Who? What?

Sidney Zion.

Oh, Sidney Zion Died?
Oh!

And Gwathmey.

Charlie Gwathmey
Died?

Yes, He Had
Esophageal Cancer.

Really?

Yes, So That's
My News Of The Day.

Oh, My God.

Really?

One After The Other,
The Deaths Have Just Been

Mounting Up,
It's Awful.

Well, There Were Always
All Those Deaths,

These Just Happen To Be
People You Know.

It's Not Like
There Was Ever A Lull

In The Number
Of Deaths.

I Know Them All.

[ "Stompin' At The Savoy"
Plays ]

Allen: I Don't Do
Any Preparation.

I Don't Do Any
Rehearsals.

Most Of The Times, I Don't Even
Know What We'Re Going To Shoot.

When I Come, They Hand Me
The Couple Of Pages,

The Material That We'Re
Going To Do For The Day,

And I See What It Is
That I'm In For.

You Know, Because
I Don't Read The Script

After I'm Finished With It
And I Rewrite It.

I Don't Read It Again

Because It Gets Stale To Me
And I Start To Hate It.

He Has A Great Feeling
For Staging.

You Have To Know Where
The Camera Should Be

In Order To Tell
What The Scene Is About

And He Has A Great Feeling
About Where The Camera Should Be

And Then What Part
Of The Set

You Want To See.

He Doesn't Like Tricks,

He Doesn't Like Effects,
He Doesn't Use Gadgets.

He Likes Collaborators
Around Him.

You Know,
It's Just One Word,

Actually, I Would Say,
It's "Simplicity."

He Is A Director Who Believes
In The Written Word.

It's Not Rocket Science.
This Is Not Quantum Physics.

If You're The Writer
Of The Story,

You Know What You Want
The Audience To See

Because
You've Written It.

It's Just Storytelling
And You Tell It.

There's No Big Deal
To It.

[ "Stompin' At The Savoy"
Plays ]

Cavett: One Night, We Were
In Trader Vic'S And We

Uncharacteristically Started
Talking About The Future.

He Used The Phrase "I Have
Endless Ideas For Movies"

And I Remember It Felt Like
The Earth Moved.

I Just Thought,
"It Would Take Me A Year

"To Have One Idea
About A Movie,

And He's Able To Think Of Making
One Or Two Or Three Or... Many?"

I Might Even Have Thought,
Somewhat Condescendingly,

"Well, He May Find Out That
It's Not All That Easy."

This Is

My Collection.

This Is How I'll Start

And There's
All Kinds Of Scraps

And Things That Are Written
On Hotel Things

And I'll, You Know,
Ponder These Things.

I'll Pull These Out And I'll
Dump Them Here Like This.

I Go Through This
All The Time,

Every Time
I Start A Project,

And I Sit Here Like This
And I'll Look At --

Oh, Don't Like That.

Right.

No.

Man: Read Me
One Note

Off Of One Piece
Of Paper.

A Note Here Would Be

"A Man Inherits
All The Magic Tricks

Of A Great Magician."

Now, That's All I Have There,
But I Could See, You Know,

A Story Forming Where
Some Little Jerk Like Myself,

At An Auction
Or At Some Opportunity,

Buys All Those Illusions
And, You Know,

Boxes And Guillotines
And Things,

And Leading Me To Some Kind
Of Interesting Adventure,

Going Into One Of Those Boxes
And Maybe Suddenly Showing Up

In A Different Timeframe
Or In A Different Country

Or In A Different Place
Altogether

Or, You Know,
Some Kind Of Thing.

And, You Know, I'll Spend
An Hour Of Thinking Of That

And It'll Go No Place And Then
I'll Go On To The Next One.

If He Has An Idea --
And He Has A Lot Of Ideas --

If He Has An Idea
And He Starts To Write It

And It Seems Like
It's Going To Work Out,

The Writing Of It
Doesn't Take Him Very Long.

I've Never Seen Anybody
Write So Fast

And Perhaps That Explains,
To A Large Extent,

Why He's Made
So Many Films.

If You Want To Compare
Woody Allen,

In The Realm
Of Productivity,

You Actually Have To
Reach Back An Era.

You Have To Reach Back
To The 1930s,

When John Ford And Howard Hawks
And Raoul Walsh

And Guys Like That Were Making
More Than One Film A Year.

They We'Re Doing It
Under The Studio System.

They Were Basically Part
Of The Dream Factory.

Now, Woody Allen
Is Doing A Film A Year

And Writing A Film A Year
For 40 Years.

That's Unheard Of.

That's Almost Without Precedent,
Except For Ingmar Bergman.

Who The Hell Is Good
For 20 Years?

This Guy's Been
Good For 40 Years.

Who'S Good For 10 Years?

Five Years?

He's Kind Of Peerless.

The Closest Figure To
Woody Allen Would Be Babe Ruth.

Babe Ruth Led
The American League

With 54 Home Runs
One Year.

The Next Guy Had 13.

Not Everybody
Has The Staying Power,

Not Everybody Has
The Tenacity,

And Not Everybody Has So Much
To Say About Life Continually.

So, From A Purely Endurance

Point Of View,
Longevity And Quantity

Is An Achievement, Yes,
But Not The Valuable One.

The Achievement
That I'm Going For Is

To Try And Make
A Great Film

And That Has Eluded Me
Over The Decades.

Maltin: After A Pretty
Amazing 10-Year Run

Of Building Goodwill With
Critics And Audiences Alike

And Then Experiencing
This Misfire,

As It Was Seen
In Many Circles,

With "Stardust Memories" --

It Was Clear That He Was Not
Going To Be Boxed In

To Any Kind Of Corner
Or Pigeonhole,

He Was Going To Do
What He Felt Like Doing,

So The Question Remained --
"What's Next?"

I Was Going To Continue
To Make Funny Films.

I Mean, I Was Not Trying
To Get Away From It --

In Fact, Probably
The Next Film I Make.

I Haven'T Made A Really
Funny Film For A While.

I Would Like
To Try That Again.

If "Stardust Memories"
Was A Misstep, Then

"A Midsummer Night'S Sex Comedy"
Was A Return To Strength.

He Was Actually Going Back
To A Known Area,

Which Was Pure Comedy.

"A Midsummer Night'S Sex Comedy"
Is The First Farce

He's Done, Really,
Since "Love And Death."

[ Clatter ]

It Was Released
As A Summer Movie.

People Thought, "Ah," You Know,
"Here Comes Woody Again."

And I Think That The Studio
Backers, You Know,

Had To Be Heaving
A Sigh Of Relief

That It Was In Color
As Well.

And I Thought
I'd Like To Do Something

In The Country,
Just For Fun,

Just To See The Country
As A Beautiful Thing,

The Way I See The City,
Just For Amusement.

Willis: And Somebody

Saw The Movie And Said,
"It Was The First Time

I've Ever Come Out Of A Movie
Whistling The Photography,"

You Know, So I Thought
It Was Pretty Funny.

The Other Aspect Of
"A Midsummer Night'S Sex Comedy"

Is That It Introduces Mia Farrow
To His Body Of Work.

Yes,
We'Ve Met Before.

Ariel Told Me
About You.

It Was Such
A Funny Coincidence

When Leopold Said

That You Were
His Cousin'S Husband,

Because I Told Him
We Were Old Friends.

Acquaintances.

We'Re Like --

Allen: Mia Wrote Me Some
Fan Letters Over The Years.

Then, Once, I Had
A New Year'S Eve Party

And I Said, You Know, "Why
Don't We Have Lunch Sometime?"

And She Said, "Sure."

Boy, If I Had Only Acted
That Time, You Know,

When Were At The Brook
That Night!

Yeah.
It Just Haunts Me.

Yeah, Me Too.

You Know,
Not A Week Has Gone By

That I Haven'T Dreamt
About You.

We Made A Date, We Had Lunch,
And Then We Started Going Out.

[ Sneeze ]

Hey, Are You Okay?

Allen: Eventually,
We Started Going Out

In A More Serious Way
And Then,

I Got To Know Her
As An Actress.

Well, You Know,
For A Woman,

The Years
Slip Away Quickly.

Don't Tell Me
You're Getting Scared.

Maybe.

But Why?
I Don't Understand.

You're So Beautiful
And Charming.

You Could Get Any Man
That You Wanted.

Not You.

Me?

I Think, Amongst All
The Love Affairs

I Was Running Through
In Those Days,

You Were The One Person
That Could've Stopped Me.

Allen: She Was
Very Nervous

When We First Started
Working Together.

She Needn'T Have Been

And It Was A Pleasure
To Work With Her.

She Was, You Know,
Always Easy To Work With.

If You Lusted
After Me So,

Why Weren'T You Also
In Love With Me?

Can The Two Feelings
Really Be Separate?

Feeney: Mia Farrow
Became His Muse

And He Began To Show Us
A Range In Mia Farrow

That Had Been Denied Us
By, Say,

"Rosemary'S Baby"
Or "Hurricane," You Know,

Just Sides Of Her
We Were Not Be Able To See,

And Woody Allen Was Able
To Bring Her Out

In All Her Rainbow
Of Colors.

And Through Her,
He Explored

A Number Of Wonderful Modes
Of Filmmaking.

And, In A Way, By So Doing,
He's Also Testing His Own Range,

He's Fulfilling Every Key On
The Pianoboard That He's Got.

He Just Runs The Scales

In His Own Talent
Through The '80s

With Mia Farrow
As His Partner.

She Was An Excellent Actress
With A Very Big Range.

You Know, She Could Play
Comedy And Broad Comedy,

She Could Play Serious
Things, And I Felt

No One Had Really
Exploited Her Much

On The Screen
And So I Wrote Roles For Her

And She Never Disappointed,
She Always Came Though

And Did A Terrific
Job For Me.

That's What "Muse" Is,
You Know,

The More You Understand
The Person,

Then You Can Bring Out These
Different Qualities In Them,

You Know, And He Did It
With Mia For Years.

Like, Who Would Have Ever
Thought That Mia Could Be

This Actress In Some
Of These Films?

"Broadway Danny Rose" --
I Mean,

Who Would've Thought
That She Could've Played

These Different Characters
With Those Accents?

I Mean,
You Didn't Think Of Mia

As That Kind Of Actress,
But He Knew Her.

You Know,
I Never Feel Guilty.

I Just Think You Got To
Do What You Got To Do.

You Know?
Life'S Short.

You Don't Get Any Medals
For Being A Boy Scout.

Allen: We Always Ate
Up At Rao'S,

An Italian Restaurant Uptown,
And Mrs. Rao, Annie Rao,

Would, You Know, Come And Sit
At The Table With Us And Chat.

She Always Had The High Blonde
Hair And Smoked A Cigarette

And Wore The Sunglasses

And She Was A Great Character,
A Wonderful Woman.

And Mia Said To Me,

"Boy, I'd Love To Play
A Woman Like That Sometime.

It'D Be Great."

And Then, When I Was Going To Do
"Broadway Danny Rose,"

It Was Perfect.

Johnny'S All Right --
He Was Really Nice To Me

When My Marriage
Fell Apart.

Yes? And What Did
Your Husband Do?

Um, A Little
Bookmaking,

Some Loan Sharking,
Extortion, Like That.

So He's
A Professional Man.

What Did You Do,
You Divorced Him

Or You Got
A Separation, Or What?

Unh-Unh, Some Guy
Shot Him In The Eyes.

Really,
He's Blind? Dead.

He's Dead,
Of Course,

Because The Bullets
Go Right Through.

Maltin: By This Time,
If You Were Following Woody,

You Never Knew What
Was Going To Come Next,

What Tone It Would Take,
What Shape It Would Take.

And Who Would Think
That The Same Man

Who Made "Broadway Danny Rose"
Would Also Give Us "Zelig"?

The Relationship Of The
Private Person To Celebrity

Is The Theme That He Inaugurates
In "Stardust Memories,"

But Which He Continues
In "Zelig."

Narrator: Leonard Zelig

Continues
To Astound Scientists

At New York'S
Manhattan Hospital,

Where Numerous Tests
Have Led Nowhere

In Determining
The Nature

Of This Astonishing
Manifestation.

And It's Done In More
Radical Comedic Terms.

There's A Stylistic Thing --
He Discovered

This Optical Process Where He
Could Bleed Himself Into

All These Actual Photographs
Of Woodrow Wilson And Whomever.

I Wanted To Do It
Like A Real,

Actual Documentary,
Where You Just About

Couldn'T Tell
The Difference.

His Transformation
Into A Rabbi

Is So Realistic That
Certain Frenchmen Suggest

He Be Sent
To Devil'S Island.

And I Thought The Theme
Of The Character

Who Was Always
Trying To Be

Who He Was Around

Was A Universal
Psychological Theme.

As The Men Discuss
Their Obesity,

An Initially Reticent
Zelig Joins In,

Swelling Himself
To A Miraculous 250 Pounds.

Next, In The Presence
Of Two Negro Men,

Zelig Rapidly
Becomes One Himself.

What Will They
Think Of Next?

And I Felt That
That, Ultimately,

Would Lead To Fascism
Because

You Would Always Be Saying
What The Crowd Wanted To Hear

And Giving Up Your Own
Beliefs And Personality.

Maltin: There Is Leonard Zelig,
Sitting Next To Adolf Hitler,

And The Mia Farrow Character
Sees Him Blending In, As Usual,

And Yet, It's Him Noticing Her
Waving At Him

That Snaps Him
Out Of That.

So, Ultimately, It's Love That
Brings Him Back To Earth.

Lauder: I Like "Purple Rose
Of Cairo" Very Much.

The Mia Farrow Character
Has A Terrible Existence.

Her Husband, Danny Aiello,
Is An Abuser.

The Only Relief She Gets
Is Movies,

So She Goes To See
The Same Movie

Over And Over Again.

She Can't Find Any Meaning
In Her Day-To-Day Existence,

But The Escapism That Movies
Provide Is The Only Meaning,

Okay, That's It,
But At Least She Has This.

This Is Something

That Encourages Her
To Hope.

Things Are Bad, But It's
Going To Turn Out Okay.

I Think That's
Such A Clever Film.

I Intended It,
You Know,

On A Much More Pretentious,
Deep Level, You Know,

That People Are Faced,
In Life,

With Choosing Between
Reality And Fantasy

And It's Very Pleasant To
Choose Fantasy,

But That Way Lies Madness

And You're Forced, Finally,
To Choose Reality

And Reality Always Disappoints,
Always Hurts You.

You Know, That Was What Made Me
Do The Film And, Of Course,

The Idea That Someone
Comes Off The Screen,

That Was The Gimmick.

You Know, I Still Can't
Get Over The Fact That,

24 Hours Ago, I Was
In An Egyptian Tomb.

I Didn't Know Any
Of You Wonderful People,

And Here I Am Now,
I'm On The Verge Of

A Madcap
Manhattan Weekend.

My God, You Must Really
Love This Picture.

Me?

You've Been Here All Day And
I've Seen You Here Twice Before.

You Mean Me?

Yes, You, You!

This Is The Fifth Time
You're Seeing This.

Henry, Come Here,
Quickly.

I Got To Speak To You.

[ Woman Gasps ]
Man: Oh, My God!

Aah!

Listen, Old Sport,
You're On The Wrong Side.

Rita: Tom,
Get Back Here!

We'Re In The Middle
Of The Story!

Leave Me Alone. I'm Going To
Have A Look Around.

You Go On Without Me.
Who Are You?

C-Cecilia.

Let'S Get Out Of Here And Go
Somewhere We Can Talk.

But You're
In The Movie.

Wrong, Cecilia,
I'm Free!

After 2,000
Performances

And The Same Monotonous
Routine, I'm Free!

Henry: Call
Father Donnelly!

Tom!

Oh, Boy!

So That's What
Popcorn Taste Like.

Been Watching People
Eat It

For All Those
Performances.

Lax: The Role Of The Handsome
Young Guy In The Piece

Was Played
By Jeff Daniels,

Who Was Really
Quite Wonderful In It.

Woody'S Not Afraid
To Change Cast Members

As He Goes Along,
If Something Doesn't Work Out,

And The Best Example
Of This Is

Michael Keaton In
"Purple Rose Of Cairo."

Taylor: He Greatly Admired
Michael Keaton And Still Does,

But Never Took The Time
To Meet Him And Then,

Once He Was There, Just Felt
He Was So Contemporary

For A Movie That Took Place
In The 1930s,

That It Just Didn't
Feel Right.

And There Have Been
Other Instances Where,

For Whatever Reason,
An Actor Hasn't Worked Out.

I Would Say That
That Doesn't Happen Often,

But, When It Does,

He's Not At All Averse
To Saying,

"We Just Need
To Start This Over."

He Shot
"September" Twice,

With Different Casts,
And That,

I Think He Would Say,
Was A Writing Problem,

He Just Felt
He Didn't Nail It.

Lax: So He Completely Recast
The Movie, For The Most Part,

And Moved People Around, As If
It Were A Repertory Company.

Casting Was Just

A Process That He Had
Very Little Patience For.

You Know, When I First Started,
I Never Even Met The Actors.

I Had My Assistant Director
Meet Them And I Would Sit Back

In The Corner Of The Room
Somewhere And Look.

And Only Over The Years
Did I Gradually Start

To Speak To The Actors, And I
Have Nothing To Say To Them.

We Used To Have Three People,
Every Five Minutes,

In To Meet Him Because

He Didn't Want To Have To
Make Much Conversation.

That Was Very Painful For Him,
Very Hard For Him.

For The Smaller Roles,

The Meetings Were Very,
Very Quick.

I Always Felt Bad
For These Actors

That Would Come In
To The Office,

They Were Being
Sent Up For A Role.

They'd Ring The Bell,
I'd Let Them In,

They'd Wait For A Second,
And We'd Go In

And I'd Introduce Them --
"This Is So And So."

And They Would Come Marching
Into The Office, Like,

Expecting, You Know,
A Half-Hour With Mr. Allen.

And Woody Would Stand Up
And Remain Standing And Say,

"Oh, Hi," You Know, I Just
Wanted To Take A Look At You

"And Juliet Thought You
Might Be Right For Something

And, Okay,
So That's It."

The Whole Thing Is Awkward.
They Have Nothing To Say.

I Have Nothing To Say.
They're Being Looked At.

They Feel Fat, You Know.
[Laughs] It's Terrible.

And He Would Sort Of, Like,
Shake Their Hands And Say,

"Thank You For Coming"

And They'd Be Ready To Sit Down
And That Was It.

So I'd Walk Out And They
Would Always Look At Me

At The End Like,
"Are You Kidding? Is That It?"

And I'd Say, "That's It."

You Know,
10 Seconds, Sometimes.

And, Of Course, Woody Feels
"But I'm Doing Them A Favor.

"They Can Go On With Their Day.
They've Other Things To Do.

They Don't Want
To Hang Around Here."

And I Keep Saying,
"Oh, Yes, They Do,

They'd Love Nothing More."

Sometimes,
For The Bigger Actors,

They Were Just Flat-Out
Offered A Role.

Banderas: His Production
Office Connected

With My People
In Los Angeles

And They Just Offered Me
The Part.

I Got A Call From My Agent,
Asking Me If I Was Available

For A Woody Allen Movie
And I Said,

"Yeah.
Yeah, I'm Available."

We Have This Very Elaborate
Dropoff System.

The Material Does Not
Go Through The Agents.

The Material Goes Right,
Directly, To The Actor.

Of Course,
It Was Very Secretive

And So The Script
Was Brought Over.

Someone Who Flew
From New York With It

And Then Drove To My House
In Northern California.

Then He Told Me,
"You're Going To Get A Script.

"It's Going To Be
Hand-Delivered.

"You're Going To Get It
At 10:30

And You Have To
Return It By 4:30."

Ahem.
I Go, "All Right."

Someone Literally Sits
On The Stoop Of Their Building,

Waiting
'Til They Finish It,

Or, Occasionally,
Lets Them Keep It Overnight.

All I Remember Is
That The Script Arrived

And It Came Hand-Delivered
And I Had To Hand It Back

And It Was All
A Very Secret Process.

He Always Includes
A Handwritten Note

With The Script
To The Actor.

The Next Day,
I Was In The Office,

The Script Was Delivered,
And There's A Cover Letter.

And There Was A Letter
From Woody.

He Sent Me An E-Mail.

I Got A Letter.
A Note, From Him.

It's Obviously Written
On A Typewriter.

Handwritten.

With The Odd Mistake,
You Know, Xed Out.

I Actually Printed It Out
And I Put It On My Wall.

I Will Frame
That Letter.

I Probably Have
The Letter In A Drawer.

And It Said That
"You May Remember Me.

You Did A Movie Called
'Melinda And Melinda.'

I Was The Director."
[Laughs]

"I Plan On Shooting
This Film 'Match Point'

In London This Summer."

"I Have This Movie
That I Wrote."

"I Think You'D Be

Really Good
For The Part Of Boris."

"I Would Love
For You To Play

The Part
Of Nola Rice."

"I'd Be Interested
In You Doing It.

"You May Not Like It.
You May Like It.

If You Don't
Like It, It's Fine."

"I Hope I Can Get
To Work With You

In This Lifetime."

"If You Feel Like
There's Something There

That You Want To Do,
That Would Be Great."

"Feel Free
To Modify Some

Of The Lines,
If You Feel Like."

"If You Want To Change The
Lines, That's Fine With Me."

"Please Read It And I
Think You Have Something

To Contribute
To This Part."

I Don't Know, Maybe
I Made That Part Up.

As A Fan Of His Movies,
Every Time I Go,

I See That The Cast
Always Works.

It's Like Everybody'S Perfect
For Each Character

And He Can Make Those
Decisions In Five Seconds.

Just Saying, "Hi,
Nice To Meet You" To Somebody,

He Knows If That Person
Is Right For That Character.

Well, That's The Whole Secret,
Is If You Hire Great People

And You Don't Mess Them Up
With A Lot Of Analysis

And Conversation
And Speculation And Nonsense,

If You Just Get Out
Of Their Way And Shut Up,

They Give You The Performance
That Has Made Them

The Great Performer
That They Are.

Are You Angry With Me?

No.

Do You Feel, Um --

Are You Disenchanted
With Our Marriage?

I Didn't Say That.

Are You In Love
With Someone Else?

My God! What Is This,
The Gestapo?

No.

Well, What? What Are
You Not Telling Me?

What Kind
Of Interrogation --

Supposing I Said, "Yes,
I Am Disenchanted,

I Am In Love
With Someone Else"?

Are You?

No!

Allen: I Used To
Always Write

From The Point Of View
Of The Male

And Always A Particular
Perspective,

The Comic Male,
The Wisecracking Comic Male,

And Then
I Met Diane Keaton,

I Got A Different
Perspective,

I Saw A Lot Of Things
Through Her Eyes

And I Started Writing
For Women.

And One Of The Things
That I Gained Was

A Female'S
Perspective

And It Was, Eventually,

More Interesting
To Me

Than The Male
Perspective

And I Attribute That
To My Experience With Her.

Hannah: Holly --
I Just Want A Salad.

You Really Think
I'm A Loser, Don't You?

What Do -- You're
Being Ridiculous.

Lee: You Are, Holly.
Stop It.

You Treat Me
Like A Loser.

How?

You Never Have Any Faith
In My Plans,

You Always Undercut
My Enthusiasm.

Not So, No,

I Think I've Been
Very Supportive.

I Try To Give You Honest,
Constructive Advice,

I'm Always Happy
To Help You Financially,

I Think I've Gone
Out Of My Way

To Introduce You
To Interesting Single Men.

Holly: Losers!
All Losers.

You're
Too Demanding!

You Know, I Could Always Tell
What You Thought Of Me

By The Type Of Men
You Fixed Me Up With.

You're Crazy!
That's Not True!

Hey, Hannah,
I Know I'm Mediocre.

[Crying] Oh, Will You
Stop Attacking Hannah?

SHe's Going Through A Really
Rough Time Right Now.

Why Are You So Upset?

You Know, You've Been
Picking On Her

Ever Since
She Came In Here.

Now Just Leave Her
Alone For A While.

I'm Just Suffocating.

Feeney: I Think
"Hannah And Her Sisters"

Is The Movie That People
Expected After "Manhattan"

And When He Satisfied That,
He Was Back

To Even Deeper Strength
Than He Ever Was Before.

Now, He's In The Bergman
Zone, Quite Literally.

He's Got Max Von Sydow In There,
But In A Very Relaxed Way.

There's Nothing Imitative
Of Bergman.

They're Simply, You Know,

Drinking From Bergman'S Cup
At Bergman'S Dinner Table, But,

At The Same Time,
Bringing Woody Allen'S

Sensibility
To The Proceedings.

But The Worst Are

The Fundamentalist
Preachers,

Third-Rate Con Men,

Telling The Poor Suckers
That Watch Them

That They Speak
For Jesus

And To Please
Send In Money.

Money, Money, Money!

If Jesus Came Back
And Saw

What's Going On
In His Name,

He'D Never Stop
Throwing Up.

Greenhut: My Favorite Is
"Hannah And Her Sisters."

It Had One Component
Which I Love,

Which Woody Loathes,
Much Of The Time,

Which Is Some Sentiment.

Allen: It's Only Optimistic
In The Sections That I Failed.

I Mean, I Wanted It To Be
A Melancholy Film,

For The Most Part,
But, For Some Reason --

Incompetence In The Directing
Or The Writing Or Something --

The Emphasis Shifted So That
It Was Perceived By Audiences

As More Up And Optimistic
Than I Had Intended.

Early On In The Film,
There's Some Suspicion

He Has A Brain Tumor.

[ Thinking ]
It's Over.

I'm Face-To-Face
With Eternity.

Not Later, But Now.

I'm So Frightened,

I Can't Move
Or Speak Or Breathe.

Well,
You're Just Fine.

There's Absolutely
Nothing Here At All.

And, Finally,
He Finds Out He's Okay

And He Comes
Out Of The Hospital

And He's Jumping
Through The Street

And Then He Stops And He
Realizes That, You Know,

"I'm Not Going To Die
From This Brain Tumor Now,

But I'm Going To Die
Someday"

And Then, He Goes Back
Into A Blue Funk.

And Then He Begins To Look
Around At Different Religions

And He's Thinking
Of Becoming A Catholic,

So He Goes To See A Priest,
The Priest Gives Him Some Books.

And Then We Get A Scene,
He's At A High Mass.

He's Way In The Back,
He's The Outsider Looking In,

The Nonbeliever
Looking In.

The Character Wants To Believe,
But He Just Can't.

Mom, Come Out!

Of Course There's
A God, You Idiot.

You Don't Believe
In God?

But If There's
A God,

Then Why Is There So Much
Evil In The World?

Just On A Simplistic Level.
Why Were There Nazis?

Tell Him, Max.

How The Hell Do I Know
Why There Were Nazis?

I Don't Know How
The Can Opener Works.

I Do Think It's
On His Mind.

I Do Think That He Thinks
About Those Things.

I Think That, When You're
Extremely Sensitive,

Which Is What He Is,

You're Very In Tune
With What Life Is

And It Has To End
And It Can Be Very Cruel.

And I Think That These Are
The Issues That Haunt Him.

I Do Believe That's The Reason
Why It's A Theme In His Movies,

Is Because He Does Think
About It A Lot.

Woody Had Said, You Know,
Making A Film Preoccupies Him

And So He Doesn't Have To
Spend The Whole Day

Thinking About
The Meaning Of Existence,

But He Spends The Day
Making A Film

About The Meaning
Of Existence.

So It Doesn't Distract Him,
In The Usual Sense,

I Mean, He's Not Out,
Playing Golf Or Playing Tennis,

He's Working These Themes
Into His Films.

This Woman'S
Going To Destroy

Everything
I've Built.

That's What
I'm Saying, Judah.

If The Woman
Won'T Listen To Reason,

Then You Go On
To The Next Step.

What, Threats,
Violence?

What Are We Talking
About, Here?

She Can Be
Gotten Rid Of.

I Mean, I Know
A Lot Of People.

Money'Ll Buy
Whatever'S Necessary.

I'm Not Even Going To
Comment On That.

That's Mindboggling.

Judah Rosenthal,
The Character I Played

In "Crimes And Misdemeanors,"
Is A Pillar Of The Community,

He's Got A Family,
He's Respected,

But He Has An Affair

With This Stewardess

Played By
Anjelica Huston

And She Becomes
A Loose Cannon In His Life.

You Told Me,
Over And Over Again,

You'D Leave Miriam!
We Made Plans!

I Didn't!
You Did!

I Gave Up Things For You,
Business Opportunities!

Oh, Pipe Dreams!

He Doesn't Know How
To Handle It

And He Calls His Brother,

Who'S A Little
On The Shady Side,

And He Resolves It

In A Way That Is
Horrendous, Really.

When I See Her,

I'm Overwhelmed
By It.

He Has A Great Deal Of
Difficulty Living With It

And Flashes Back
On A Seder,

Passover Dinner,
That He Remembered,

Where A Lot Of Religion
And Philosophy Is Discussed.

Man: What Are You
Saying, May,

There's No Morality,

Anywhere
In The Whole World?

Listen, For Those Who Want
Morality, There's Morality.

Nothing'S Handed Down
In Stone.

Sol'S Kind Of Faith
Is A Gift.

It's Like An Ear For Music
Or The Talent To Draw.

He Believes
And You Can Use Logic

On Him All Day Long
And He Still Believes.

Must Everything Be
Logical?

And If A Man Commits
A Crime, If He --

If He Kills?

Then, One Way Or Another,
He Will Be Punished.

If He's Caught, Sol.

No, No, No! Whether
It's The Old Testament

Or Shakespeare,
Murder Will Out.

Who Said Anything
About Murder?

You Did.

Did I?

Woody Walks A Real Tightrope
In "Crimes And Misdemeanors,"

Because He's Telling,
Essentially,

A Very Serious Story,

Yet He Knows To Counterbalance
It With A Lighter Story,

Involving Him And Mia Farrow
And Alan Alda.

And It's That
Very Deft Combination

That Makes
The Movie Work.

It's Amazing --
I Couldn'T Graduate

And The Same School
Now Teaches A Course

In Existential Motifs
In My Situation Comedies.

Halley: Really?

Yeah.

I Could've Done
The Whole Picture

Just As The Murder Story

And Very Often Regretted
That I Didn't

Because I Found Marty Landau'S
Story So Compelling

And So Interesting
And Mine So Uninteresting.

And Then It Occurred
To Me That,

If My Character Made The Film
About Alan Alda,

It Tied The Whole Thing Up
Because It Was A Funny Idea,

That I Was Forced To Make
This Aggrandizing Documentary

About This Guy
That I Couldn'T Stand.

The Thing To Remember
About Comedy Is

If It Bends,
It's Funny;

If It Breaks,
It's Not Funny.

So You Got To Get Back From
The Pain, You See What I Mean?

Issues Of What Life Is About
And Why We'Re Here

And Why It's So Painful

And Relationships
Between The Human Being

And His Existence
And Human Loneliness,

That Never Gets Resolved

And So It's Of Constant
Interest To Me.

Hi, Cliff.
Cliff! Hello.

Allen: And I Can See,
If I Look Back On My Work,

I See Some Of Those Themes
Creep In All The Time.

I Wanted To Give You
This Letter Back.

It's My One
Love Letter.

I'm Cursed With
The Clown'S Approach To It

And I Always Have To
Approach It In A Comic Way.

I Plagiarized Most
Of It From James Joyce.

You Probably
Wondered

Why All The References
To Dublin.

I Wish I Had Been Born

A Gifted And Great Tragedian,
But I Wasn't.

What Are Your Views
On Divine Matters?

Excuse Me, Me?

I'm Asking You
If You Believe In God.

It's Incredible, That's
The Third Time Tonight

Somebody Asked Me That
Exact Same Question.

You Know,
I Would Love To,

Believe Me, I Know I
Would Be Much Happier.

Yeah,
But You Can't.

I Can't, No,
It's Just, You Know --

You Doubt His Existence
And You Can't Make

The Leap Of Faith
Necessary.

Listen, I Can't Make The
Leap Of Faith Necessary

To Believe
In My Own Existence.

Woman: Here'S
Your Drink, Kleinman.

That's Fine,
That's Tricky.

You Keep Making Jokes
Until The Moment Comes

And You've Really
Got To Face Death.

Why Are You Always
On Such A Morbid Subject?

I Just, You Know,
That's The Future.

Woman: If I Thought
That There Was Nothing

Except This,
I'd Kill Myself.

I've Thought Of It.

Believe Me,
There Have Been Many Times

When My Brain Has Said
"Why Not?"

I Mean, There's
No Point To Anything.

But, Somehow, My Blood
Always Said "Live, Live,"

And I Always Listen
To My Blood.

Cusack: Woody Allen,

He's Always Swimming Around
The Same Philosophical Issues.

There's Still That Thing
You Can Do With His Films

Where They'Ll Get You
Thinking And Talking

Or They'Ll Spur Something
In You That,

You Know,
It's Good Medicine.

I Think That Woody Allen
Asks These Important Questions,

"Is There A God?
Isn'T There A God?

Is There Life
Beyond The Grave?"

Makes Him Unique Among
Contemporary Filmmakers,

But Also Makes Him Unique

In The History
Of American Cinema.

These Are
The Two Key Questions

And He Just Keeps
Hammering Away At Them.

You Know Who Has These
Thoughts All The Time?

Is Schultz The Tailor.

He Thinks That Nothing
Is Real At All

And That Everything
Exists Only

In The Dream
Of A Dog.

But This Is Real,
Isn'T It?

And Beautiful.

Lax: So Woody And Mia Had
This Kind Of Idyllic Life --

Certainly,
In The Public Mind.

Here Were Two
Accomplished Artists,

They Had This Strange
Relationship

Where He Lived In His Place,
She Lived In Her Place,

But She Was In All His Movies
And He Was There Every Day

And Then They Adopted A Daughter
And Then They Had A Son

And It Seemed Kind Of
The Perfect Thing.

You Know, They'd Talk
About How They Could Each Go

Out Their Windows
Or Their Balconies

And Wave At Each Other
Across The Park

And This Came
To A Crashing End

During The Filming Of
"Husbands And Wives."

Things Fell Apart At The Very
End Of The Shooting.

Really, There May Have Been Two
Or Three Days Left Of Shooting.

She Must Have Called Him

And I Remember Him
Answering The Phone

Because We Were, Like, Waiting
For Him To Shoot The Sequence

And I Could Tell Something
Disturbing Was Happening

On The Other End
Of This Phone Call.

Mia Discovered That Woody
Was Having This Affair

With One Of Her
Adopted Kids.

Mia Had Gone Over To Woody'S
Apartment For Something And,

On A Mantelpiece
In A Room,

Discovered Some Nude Polaroids
Of Her Adopted Daughter Soon-Yi.

It Took Me

Two Or Three Days
To Convince Mia

To Come Back To Work
And Finish The Film

Because Her Reaction Was
"There's Absolutely No Way

I Could See This Person
Anymore."

And, Yet, They Had To,
In The Midst

Of This Terrible Emotional
Thing For Both Of Them,

Behave In A Professional
Manner To Finish The Work.

So She,
Like A Trooper,

Came And Finished
Her Job.

We Were Going To
The Faculty Dinner --

And I'll Never
Forget This --

Around Fifth Avenue
And It Was Just

An Icy Black Night,
We Were Walking Downtown.

Remember That?
And Then, Suddenly,

We Decided Not To Go
To The Dinner,

Just Said,
"The Hell With It."

It Was Just Such
A Beautiful Night.

We Walked Into
Central Park.

It Was, You Know,
So Snowy That Night.

I Remember
How Cold It Was.

We Could See
Every Star.

You Were So Beautiful
In That Black Dress.

Really -- Mmm.

Don't Do That.

Why Not?

Because It's Over
And We Both Know It.

Brickman: When The Great
Cosmic Rift Occurred,

You Know,
Across The Park

Woody Was The Antichrist

On The Front Page Of
The New York Post Every Day.

Lax: Their Life Blew Up
And This Just Became Fodder

For The Gossip Magazines

And For Television
And For Newspapers.

It Was Intensely Covered.

The 12-Year Relationship
Of Woody Allen

And Mia Farrow
Has Come To A Bitter End.

Director Woody Allen
Has Confirmed He Is

In Love With Mia Farrow'S
Adopted Daughter.

The Acrimonious Breakup
Caused By Allen'S Affair

With Farrow'S Adopted
Daughter Soon-Yi.

[ Speaking
French ]

Lax: And When It Became
A Custody Battle Between Them,

It Was Almost Lurid,
In The Way That It Was Handled.

There Was Nothing Too Small
That Wasn't Scooped Up.

Woody Allen And Mia Farrow
Have A Date Tomorrow...

In Court.

People Everywhere
In The Country

Are Talking About An Ugly
Child Custody Battle.

The Mud
Thickened Today

In The Child
Custody Battle

Between Woody Allen
And Actress Mia Farrow.

That Bitter Battle
Between Woody Allen

And Mia Farrow
Over Visitation

And Custody Rights
To Their Children

Heated Up Again
Today.

His Breakup With Longtime
Companion Mia Farrow

And Their Subsequent Fight
Over Child Custody

Has Turned His Private Life
Into A Public Soap Opera.

Believe It Or Not,
I Didn't Think

I Was That Famous,
To Warrant Such Coverage.

I Was On Magazine Covers.

I'm Thinking,
"You Got To Be Kidding.

I'm Not That Big A Deal,
To Warrant This Interest."

But, Apparently,
It Was A Good, Juicy Story,

A Very Juicy Story
And, You Know,

It Took A Little Edge
Off My Natural Blandness.

You Realize How These
Celebrity Cases Come To Play,

That Nothing Can Be More
Important In The Country

At That Moment Than Whatever
Celebrity Case Is Playing

And It Will Last Until
The Next One Comes Along.

A Judge Has Refused
Woody Allen'S Request

For Custody Of
His Three Children --

One Biological,
Two Adopted.

Aronson: The Custody
Issue Was --

Was Terrible.

That Was --
You Know, He Didn't --

He Never Cares What They Write
About Him In The Newspaper.

Even Though I Care And People
Who Care About Him Care,

He Doesn't Care And He Doesn't
Read It So It Doesn't,

You Know, Impact Him
In The Same Way.

Not Being Able
To See His Kids

Was Terrible For Him.

Taylor: All Through
This Upset With Mia

And The Scandal
Surrounding It,

He Was Never Late
For A Meeting.

We Would Have
A Casting Session

Before He'D Go To Court,
Half The Time.

He Never Missed A Beat.

It Was Almost As If

Woody Has Dreaded So Many Bad
Things Happening To Him In Life

That, When Something Really
Bad Did Happen To Him,

He Was Totally Prepared.

Everybody Had An Opinion
About My Private Life,

Which I Felt They
Were All Free To Have

And Free To Respond In Any Way
That Made Them Happy.

They Could Sympathize With Me,
Not Sympathize With Me;

They Could Dislike Me,
They Could Like Me;

They Could, You Know --

It Could Have No Effect
On Whether They Saw My Films,

They Could Never See
My Films Again.

None Of That Mattered
To Me.

I Really,
At The Time, Thought,

"Oh, My God, Is This Really
The Ruination Of Woody?"

But, You Know,

He Was Able To Continue
His Work And His Career,

Which, To Me,
Is The Main Thing.

How Much I Envy His Ability
To Compartmentalize.

He Was Able To Continue
To Work All The Time --

Woody Has The Ability
To Compartmentalize His Life.

So He Was Able To Sort Of
Compartmentalize --

Woody'S Ability
To Compartmentalize --

He Can Compartmentalize
His Life.

I'm Very Good
At Compartmentalizing,

For Better Or Worse.

When We Were Writing
"Bullets Over Broadway,"

The Custody Trial Was
About To Happen

And So There Were,
Of Necessity,

A Lot Of Interruptions
In Our Work.

We'd Be Talking
Through The Scenes,

As We Would Do
With Each Other,

And Then The Phone
Would Ring And He'D Say,

"Oh, Excuse Me, I Got To
Take This" And Then He'D Go Over

And You Would Hear A Very Hushed
"Hello," You'D Hear, You Know,

"Detective" And Maybe
"Get A Sample."

You Know, You'D Hear Kind Of
Hair-Raising Phrases

And Then He'D Hang Up
And He'D Come Back And He'D Go,

[ Snaps Fingers ]
"Okay, Let'S Go Back To Work."

I Just Remember This One Day,
We Had Been Interrupted

Three Times And,
After The Third Time,

When There'D Been Some Other
Grisly Exchange On The Phone,

He Came Back And He Looked
At Me And He Goes,

"Okay, Back To Work
On Our Little Comic Bauble."

We Got The Money!
We Can Do The Play!

What?!
When?! How?!

A Single Backer Going
For The Whole Show.

And No Hitches?

Well, Uh...

We'll Meet Tomorrow
And Discuss It, All Right?

I Just Thought
It Was A Funny Idea,

That A Guy Wants
To Put On A Show

And A Gangster, You Know,
Bankrolls It

And Makes His Girlfriend
The Star Of It,

Or One Of The Stars
Of It.

Nick: Hey, Dave,
She Read Your Play. Olive: Yes, Yes --

She Thinks It's Great.

It's Thrilling, Turbulent,
A Page-Turner.

Charmed, Charmed,
Charmed, Charmed.

SHe's A Great Little
Actress, You Know.

She Just Needs
As Break.

So What Have You
Been In, Miss, Uh...?

Olive, Olive, Olive.
Call Me Olive, Honey.

Olive. You're -- Well,
You're Experienced?

Well, I Had
A Little Experience.

Oh, She Ain'T Got
No Experience.

I Do, Too.
I Have, Too! SHe's A Natural.

They Ain'T Talking
Dancing, Olive.

He Doesn't Know What
He's Talking About.

You Don't Mean
Dancing, Do You?

She Used To Wiggle At This
Joint In Hoboken, You Know,

Pick Up Quarters Off
The Tabletops With Her --

Hey!
Hey! Hey!

I'm Just Trying To Break
The Ice, All Right?

Butt Out, Why Don't You!
They're Talking To Me!

Who Wants A Drink?
I'll Have A Double Anything.

"Bullets Over Broadway"
Is Just --

I Just Think
It's A Wonderful Movie.

I Mean,
You Know What They Say,

"Write About What You Know" --
Well.

It Must Be Difficult,
Getting A Work Like This On.

It's A Sad Reality
Of The Marketplace,

I'll Tell You.

We'Ve Never Really Had
A Chance To Talk.

No.
Hi, Folks. What Can I Get You?

Two Martinis,
Please, Very Dry.

How'D You Know
What I Drank?

Oh, You Want One, Too?
Three.

Mcgrath: We Spoke A Lot By Phone
When He Was Making "Bullets"

And So I'd Say,
"How'S The Movie Going?"

And He'D Say,
"Everything'S Going Great,"

But, At First,
Dianne Wiest,

Whom I Had Felt,
Right From The Beginning,

Was Wrong For That Part --
And Had No Trouble Telling Him.

I Kept Saying, "Dianne Wiest
For That Vain, Hammy Actress?"

Because You Know,

SHe's So Sweet And Vulnerable
And, You Know,

It Seemed So Not Like
Dianne Wiest.

And He Kept Saying,

"No, She Has To Do It.
She Can Do Anything."

So I Thought, "Okay, Go Ahead,
Sink Your Own Picture,

What Do I Know?"

What Happened Was This --
We Shot For Two Days.

He Said, "Tonight, Come And See
The Dailies With Me."

I Sat There And I Saw
This Painful, Painful Attempt

For Me To Do This Role,
Pathetic, Pathetic.

He Said, "Do You See?"
And I Said, "Yeah, I Do."

He Said, "Well," You Know,
"What Are You Going To Do?"

And I Said, "You've Got To
Pick Up The Phone

"And You've Got To Find
Somebody Who Can Do This.

It's Not Me.
You've Got To Replace Me."

He Said, "No, No, No, No.

There's Something We Can Do.
There's Something."

When I Was Talking To Her,
She Was Convinced

She Was Going To Get Fired.

And With The First Couple
Things We Reshot,

She Didn't Have
That Deep Baritone Voice

And I Think She Was
Sort Of Finding That.

Or They Were Finding It
Together.

Without My Own Voice,
I Was Free To Do

This Mad, Crazy, You Know,
Psychotic Woman.

Helen, Have You Thought
About What I Said Before,

About The Way I Feel?
Don't Speak.

But I Want
To Express --

Don't Speak, Don't.

There's Just A Few Things
That I Want To Tell You --

Don't Speak, No, No.

When We First Met,
I Was Thinking --

Don't Speak. Please,
Don't Speak, Please.

Don't Speak! No!
No, No, No!

Go, Go,
Gentle Scorpio, Go!

Your Pisces Wishes You
Every Happy Return.

Just One --

Don't Speak!

She Couldn'T Believe
That I Wanted Her

To Play It So Broadly,

And I Did,
I Wanted Her To Play It

Like Norma Desmond,
Just As Broad As Could Be.

She Went Straight
From There To Her,

I Think,
Second Academy Award.

Lax: And So It's Odd --

He's A Director
Whose Actors Get

Tremendous Numbers Of Awards
Or Nominations For Awards,

But If You Watch Him
On The Set,

He's The Least Directive
Director You Can Imagine.

I Love His Directing Style
Because, Honestly,

A Director Who Has
Confidence In His Actors

And Who Doesn't Try
And Muscle Them Around The Set,

Allows Them To Blossom
And Makes Them Take

The Responsibility
For Their Performance.

See, The Thing Is, If You're
With Somebody Who Says,

"It's All You Now, Go,"
It Really Then

Puts The Ball In Your Court,
You Got To Come With The Goods.

So Let Me Ask You
A Question --

Are You Ever
Frightened That,

When A Guy Comes Over
Your House And Pays You,

That He's Going To,
You Know,

Maybe Like Tie You Up
And Kill You?

Oh, No, I Always
Get Paid In Advance.

[ Fanfare Plays ]

Come On.

He Said That He Didn't
Really Like To Rehearse,

Unless I Wanted To, And I
Was Like, "No, That's Okay,"

Because I Actually Didn't
Really Love Rehearsing Either.

He Said, "You Don't
Have To Say Any

Of The Words I've Written,
If You Don't Want To"

And I Was Shocked
Because I Was Like,

This Is The Best, Genius,
Comedy Writer We Have.

His Script Is So Fantastic,
Why Wouldn'T I Say The Words?

And He Said, "No, The Script
Is Just A Blueprint.

"It's Whatever Makes You

"As Real, Natural,
And Funny As Possible.

"So If You Want To Say
Something Else,

Go Ahead And Say It."

And You Never Thought Of
Just Getting A Regular Job?

Well, Yeah, Sure I Did.
No, I Did Things.

I Waited On Tables,
I Worked

In A Massage Parlor,
I Did Phone Sex.

Now And Then,
I Would, You Know,

Turn A Few Tricks

In Order To Make
Some Dough.

And One Day, My Friend
Suzie Calls Me

And She Asks Me If I
Want To Be In A Film,

Something Called
"Snatch Happy,"

And I Said Sure
And I Remember

I Was Very Nervous Because
I'd Never Done It

In Front Of People
With A Camera Before,

You Know, And So, There
I Am On The First Day,

On The Set,
And There's This Guy

Fucking Me
From Behind, Right?

And There's These Two Huge
Guys Dressed Like Cops

In My Mouth
At The Same Time

And I Remember
Thinking To Myself,

"I Like Acting.
I Want To Study."

I Never Expected
To Win The Oscar, Never.

And I Was, Like,
Preparing To Be Happy

For Whomever'S Name
They Called,

And Then
They Called Mine.

I Think The Secret Is

That Everybody Wants
To Work For Him So Badly

That They Know
They Have To Do Their Best

And I Think They Bring
Their Very Best

To The Set Every Day
On A Woody Allen Film.

They Don't Want
To Disappoint.

Allen: We Gave Sean
Guitar Lessons.

Six Months
Before The Movie,

We Sent A Guitar --
We Paid For A Guitar Teacher

To Go Over To Europe
And Stay With Him.

So, I Didn't Have To, You Know,
Do One Of Those Shots

Where You Always Had To Cut Away
To Someone Else'S Hand.

That Was Sean.

Penn: He Didn't Ask
To See Or Know Anything

Until He Rolled
The Camera.

His Feeling Is That The Best,
Complete Thing He's Going To Get

Is Going To Come Out
Of The Actor'S Instinct

And That What He Finds Out
On Day One Is

Whether Or Not
He Cast It Well.

Really, I'm Not One
Of These Guys

Who Gets
His Head Turned

Every Time
Some Dame Walks By.

I've Had Plenty
Of Beautiful Women

And I Always Put 'Em
In Their Place.

Yeah, "Love 'Em
And Leave 'Em,"

That's My Motto.

"Love 'Em
And Don't Look Back."

I Never Once Regretted --
Not One Time

Did I Ever Regret
Dumping A Beautiful Dame.

Because You Got To
Keep Your Guard Up.

You Don't,
Them Pretty Ones

Get Their Worms
In You

And Then It's Over,
You're Done.

Particularly
If You're An Artist.

Nah, I've Seen Too Many
Guys Crying In Their Beer.

Me? I'm Going To Be
A Star.

Penn: After The "Cut"
Was Called,

I Looked At Him To Say,
You Know,

"Should I Choose Window
Or Aisle On My Way Home

Or Am I Sticking Around?"

And He Was Already Looking
At Somebody Else,

Getting, You Know, Ready To
Just, You Know, Do Another Take,

Or Do Something, And There
Was Never A Comment At All.

To This Day,
I've Never Heard Him Make

A Specific Comment About
The Character That I Played.

But When It Comes
To Directing An Actor,

It's A Bare-Bones Clarity
That Any Personality

Can Understand
And Interpret.

I Can't Write
All Night

And Then Drive
In The Daytime!

You Know, I Fell
Asleep At The Wheel.

Oh, God.
Well, Are You Okay?

Did Anyone Get Hurt?

Look, I Need Time
To Work On My Book.

When Are You Going To
Finish That Book?

Like That?

Y-Yes, Physically
Like That,

But What's Missing
From It Is

The Argumentation.

Watts: I Think I've Come
To Realize That He Is

The Best Actor'S Director
I've Ever Worked With,

And I've Worked With
Some Really Good Ones,

So I Say That

After A Lot Of Thought.

And So, While He's Giving Us
A Lot Of Free Rein,

He's Still Going For
Something Very Specific,

The Way He's Offering These
Suggestions All The Time,

But Then Sort Of
Backtracking And Saying,

"But We Don't Have To,"
And, You Know,

"If You Don't Feel
Comfortable With It,

Then Forget
I Ever Said It,"

So It Can Just Be
Real Life.

I Mean, How Many Times
Can You Write

And Tear Up And Rewrite
These Chapters?!

It's Like You're
Scared To Finish.

Okay, You Know What?
You're Right.

I'm Gun-Shy,
I Can't Handle It,

If It's Confirmed,
Yet Again,

That All Those Nice Things
Predicted About Me Were Wrong.

That I Was, What,
A Flash In The Pan?

Well, Stalling
Is Not The Answer.

All My Friends
Have Family!

Can I Do That?

Yeah, Sure, Yeah.

Sorry, I Didn't Mean
To Scare You.

Warn Me.

And You Shut The Door

Because We'Re Going To
Cut In Here.

I'm Anything But Comfortable
On This Set, For Sure.

I've Spent A Week And A Half
Here Getting Ready To Start

And It's Been The Most Torturous
Week And A Half Of My Life

Because He's One Of These Guys
That You Want To Please,

You Know, You Really Want
To Please Him.

It's Like Going Back To,
You Know, Acting School,

You Know?
I Feel Like I Know Nothing

And I Just Want To Please
This Guy's Vision.

And SHe's Sipping
Her Drink, Chatting.

Brolin: Right Here.
And I'm --

You're In Here
With Her.

"Why?" You Ask.

Uh-Huh.

No, I Didn't Ask Why,
I Just Asked Where.

I Mean, "Why?" Is Always
The Question,

Why We Do Have To Be
Alone Together?

That I Can Never Find
The Answer To.

What Could You Do
In Here?

Just Be
Uncomfortable.

Okay.

I Mean, What Could
I Do As An Action,

What Could I Do
As A...?

I Mean,
You Can Come In --

I Mean, You Can Come In
For Your Cigarettes,

You Know, Get Them
While You're Here.

You Can Come In
And Sit Down

In Anticipation
Of Your Salad.

You Know,
If They Say To Me,

"Would You Like Me
To Do It This Way?"

Or "Was I Too Mean In That?"

You Know, I Can't Just Stare
Back At Them And Not Answer,

So I Have To Say
"Yes" Or "No."

You Do Get Actors
That Want A Little Feedback

And They Do Ask Questions

And I Give Them
A Short Answer,

A Short, Flattering Answer --
"Oh, You Were Great,"

You Know, "Do Exactly
What You're Doing,"

Or Something,
And They're Fine.

Do It That Way
And Let'S See.

This Was Quite Good.

Now, If You're
Telling Me You Can Be

Even More Natural, Fine,
That Never Hurts Anything,

But This Was Not --

If You Saw This,
You Wouldn'T Think,

"Oh, It's Not Authentic"
Or "It's Artificial."

Right. Well, That's What
I Don't Want, By Any Means.

It Looks
Perfectly Natural.

Brolin: I Ask Him
A Lot Of Questions.

He Says, "Don't Worry About It.
Get A Good Night'S Sleep.

I'll See You Tomorrow,"
You Know, "Learn Your Lines

And I'll Point You In The Right
Direction And You'Ll Be Fine."

He Doesn't Really
Go Into Motivation Or,

Like, Acting Stuff, Like,

You Know, "What's The Back
History, What's The Story?"

He Doesn't Really
Go Into Any Of That.

I Think --
I'm Not Sure --

I Think He Once Gave
A Standard Direction,

"Do It Faster."

We Didn't Meet Until
Three Days Before Filming,

When I Showed Up In Paris,

And We Shook Hands And He
Asked Me How My Flight Was

And It Was A Good Flight
And Uneventful

And He Said, "Great. This Will
Be The Last You Hear From Me."

The Words I Think You Hear
Most Often On Set Are

"Make It Up.
Make Yourself Comfortable.

Put It In Your Own Words.
If You Get An Idea, Go With It."

Even If I Have To Say Something
Like, "Woody, Nobody Says

'Valise,'" You Know,
"I Can't Say 'Valise.'"

And He'll Say,
"Well, What Would You Say?"

"I Have A Suitcase,"
He'll Say,

"Fine, Say 'Suitcase.'
It Doesn't Matter.

"Say Whatever You Think,

As Long As It Has The Same
Intention As The Line."

Some Of The Directions
Would Be Like, You Know,

"What You're Doing Is
Very Good But, You Know,

There's A Knicks Game And...
Speed It Up."

"You've Got To Move This Along
Because I've Got To Leave.

The Knicks Are Playing."
Sure.

I Don't Have A Lot Of Patience,
In Life, Or In General,

So, You Know, I Don't Have
The Patience To Do Another Take.

If I've Gotten What I Want,

Then I Want To Move On,
Finish, And Go Home.

I Don't Have The Concentration
Or The Dedication

That You Really Need
To Be A Great Artist.

I'd Rather Be Home,
Watching The Ballgame.

He Is A Very Efficient Worker
And Runs His Set In A Way

Where Everyone'S Working Hard,
But Nobody'S Taxed

Or No One'S Like,
"Oh, My Gosh,

I Can't Believe We'Re
On Another 18-Hour Day."

You Only Do
A Handful Of Takes.

He Gets Most Of His Footage
In Master Shots,

So He'll Shoot A 4- Or 5-Page
Scene All In One Shot.

I'd Be Conscious Of
"Okay, One Page To Go.

You Got A Line Coming Up,
You Got A Line Coming Up."

Because You Didn't Want
To Screw Up Because Then You

Have To Go Back To The Beginning
And Do It All Over Again.

You Didn't Want
To Mess Up The Take.

It's Daunting.

Almost A Hundred Years After
The Abolition Of Slavery,

A Man Couldn'T Play
A Game Of Baseball

In The Big Leagues If His
Skin Color Was Black, Okay?

You're Harping
On One Point.

Okay, Forget Blacks!
Take Jews.

What?
Here We Go.

For Years, They Restricted
The Number Of Jews

In School --
Medical School.

In America, As Much As
They Hated Blacks,

They Hate Jews
Even More.

Why?

Blacks, They Were Scared
Had Too Big A Penis.

Jews, They Hated, Even
With Little Penises.

For God'S Sake,
I'm Eating!

After I Did My First Scene,
He Came Up To Me And Said,

"That Wasn't Horrible."

[ Laughs ]

But This Notion That I Hear
That He Doesn't Direct,

I Mean, That's Kind Of
Ridiculous.

He Gets What He Wants.

The Thing About Woody,
As A Director,

Was "Just Go, Be There
And Do Whatever You Want

And Mess Up The Lines And
Turn Your Back To The Camera

And Let's Grab It Here
And Lets Go."

You Got To Go Back
To Your Shrink.

I Want You To See
Dr. Ballard Again.

Larry, I Went
For Two Years!

Yeah, I Know,
But You Know How

General Motors Will
Recall Defective Cars?

You Got To Go In
For A Tuneup.

Larry, We'll Be In And Out
In Five Minutes, Honey.

No, No,
I'm Telling You!

I'm Your Husband.
I Command You To Sleep!

Well, I --
Sleep!

No!
I Command It! I Command It!

It Was So Easy.

It Was So Simple
And Relaxed And Fun

And No Pressure
And Nobody Expected Anything

And I've Never Worked
With Anybody Like That, Ever.

This Musical We Did,
"Everyone Says I Love You,"

We Had A Very Involved
Sequence With Goldie Hawn

Which Involved Dancing
With Wires In Paris.

As Far As Woody
Was Concerned,

"Oh, We'll Just Show Up
And Do It On The Day."

I Said, "Well, You Know,
There's, Like,

All These Flying Rigs And,
You Know, Dance Choreography

And, I Mean, This All
Has To Be Worked Out.

We Just Can't Show Up
On The Day With, You Know,

With A Hundred Guys
On The Quay."

I Used To Have To, Like,
Drag Him, Kicking And Screaming,

For, Like, One Or Two Rehearsals
For Something Like That.

™? Just You ™?

™? Just Me ™?

™? Let's Find
A Cozy Spot ™?

™? Where No One
Can See ™?

Allen: I Wanted To Do The Old-
Fashioned Kind Of Musical,

Where I Used
Old-Fashioned Songs.

I Didn't Want To Do Anything
More Innovative Or Modern,

I Just, You Know, Wanted
To Get People Who, You Know,

Like To Sing In The Shower
Or Couldn'T Sing.

None Of That
Mattered To Me.

™? What Are
My Arms For? ™?

™? Use Your
Imagination ™?

™? Just Us ™?

™? Just The Two
Of Us ™?

Allen: That Film
Has Got Its Fans,

But It Was Not
A Huge Success.

I Did It,
Like All My Films,

For The Few People
Who Like It.

Feeney: It's Interesting,
Because Of The Auteur Theory,

There Were A Lot
Of Filmmakers Who Felt,

"No, I Have To Make
A Great Film."

People Felt Obliged
To Top Themselves.

Woody Allen Has Never Felt
Obliged To Top Himself.

He's Felt Obliged To Do
Whatever Interests Him Most,

To Go There With
A Full Commitment,

But When He's Done,
He Moves On,

And He Just -- He Moves
Right Into The Next Thing.

Allen: "Deconstructing Harry"
Was Based On The Premise

That You Learned About
The Character And His Life

From What He Wrote.

So Harry Was A Writer
Who'S Having A Writer'S Block

And Was Going Through Bad Child
Custody Stuff With His Ex-Wife.

Sick, Sick, Sick
[Bleep] Bastard.

And I Thought That
Would Be Interesting,

That What He Wrote Was Telling

And Maybe Even Sometimes
More Telling About Him

Than How He Carried On
In His Actual Life.

I Like It.

A Character Who'S Too Neurotic
To Function In Life,

That Can Only Function In Art.

Allen: Now Harry'S
Nothing Like Me.

I've Never Had
A Writer'S Block In My Life.

You Know, I Would Never
Have The Nerve

To Kidnap A Child
In A Custody Thing.

I -- That's Not My Life.

What's The Man Like?

It's Me, Thinly Disguised.

In Fact,
I-I Don't Even Think

I Should
Disguise It Anymore.

It's --
You Know, I-It's Me.

Uh-Huh.

In The Late '90s And Then Into
The Turn Of The Next Century,

Some People Were Starting
To Write Him Off,

Saying That He Was Played Out.

There's A Period That Comes
After "Deconstructing Harry"

Where I Just Had To Think
Of It As Woody Adrift,

Because He Was Making
A Film A Year.

They Were Coming Out Steadily,

But There Was Something That
Was Off In Film After Film.

You Know, And There Would Always
Be Something That Was On

In Film After Film
At The Same Time.

But You'D See And You'D Go Into
Each New Woody Allen Film

And Hope,
'Cause You Never Do Know.

I Suggested Once To Him,

"What If You Were Only Making
One Film Every Two Years?

"Wouldn'T That Be
More Of An Event?

"Wouldn'T People Just Feel Like

There Was Something
Special About It?"

And He Said, "No, That Makes
No Sense At All."

He Just Has To Be
Out There Making Films.

He's Always Been A Person
Who'S Done What He Wanted,

Whether It Was Moving
From "Bananas" To "Annie Hall"

Or Moving From "Annie Hall"
To "Interiors."

There's Always Been...

His Career Has Been Guided
Purely By His Sense

Of What's The Right
Thing For Him To Do,

Not "What Does The Audience
Want Me To Do?"

And He's Not Afraid To Fail.
That's The Thing, Too.

Like, Failure Does Noth--
He Kind Of --

You Can Tell

He Kind Of Approaches It
Like A Baseball Player.

Like, "Okay, I'll Get 'Em
The Next Time."

I'm Willing To Fail Without
Any Problem Whatsoever.

I Just -- I Draw The Line

At An Obvious, Flagrant
Committing Suicide.

I Don't Really Care About
Commercial Success,

And The End Result
Is I Rarely Achieve It.

See, That's One Of The Great
Things About Woody.

He Really Doesn't Give A Hoot
What Anybody Says About Him,

You Know, Which I Think

Is The Hallmark Of
An Artistic Sensibility,

As Opposed To Kind Of A More
Normal Movie-Making Sensibility.

You Know, How Can You
Get Too Caught Up

In Reviews
Or How The Movie'S Doing

If You're Already On
To Your Next Movie?

Which Is Probably
A Good Way To Be,

'Cause It Kind Of Protects You
A Little Bit From, You Know,

"How'S This Doing?"

Or "What Are The Numbers
On This?"

It's An Artist

Who Continually Paints

And Has To Be Heard From
And Has To --

Maybe.

I Don't Know Why You Do This,

But Do You Do It
So That You Know You're Alive

And You Want To Let People
Know You're Alive

And You're Still Thinking

And You're Still In There
Punching?

You Know, I Think Probably
That's What It Is.

How Many Great Films
Has He Made?

A Lot.
You Know, So He's Made

A Few Clunkers,
But Even The Clunkers,

There's Always
Something About Them.

Always.

That's Art.

I've Been Working On
The Quantity Theory.

I Feel If I Keep Making Films
And Just Keep Making Them,

Every Once In A While,
I'll Get Lucky

And One Will Come Out,
And That's Exactly What Happens.

I Just Will Never Forget,
You Know,

After
"Curse Of The Jade Scorpion,"

After "Anything Else,"

After All Those Films
That Seemed To Wander...

In A Theater, Seeing A Movie.

Okay, Here'S A Coming Attraction

For A Film
That's Set In Britain.

It's A Thriller,

And It Looks Really Intense,
And It's Got A Good Cast.

People Are Nudging,
"Hey, Let's See This."

Man:
So You're Threatening Me?

If I Don't Do What You Say,
You're Going To Go To My Wife.

Hello?

Who Keeps Calling?

You Lied To Me.

You're A Liar!

You Can Learn
To Push The Guilt

Under The Rug
And Go On.

Otherwise,
It Overwhelms You.

[ Gunshot ]

Feeney: And Then,
Suddenly, Boom --

"Written And Directed
By Woody Allen."

"Match Point."
Hello, What's This?

I Grew Up On Woody Allen Movies,

So, For Me, Working With Woody
Was Always --

That Was Like, You Made It.

You Have To Lean In

And Hit Through
The Ball.

I Was Doing Just Fine
Until You Showed Up.

Ah, The Story Of My Life.

So Tell Me,

What's A Beautiful Young
American Ping Pong Player

Doing Mingling Amongst
The British Upper Class?

Did Anyone
Ever Tell You

You Play A Very
Aggressive Game?

Did Anyone Ever Tell You
You Have Very Sensual Lips?

Extremely Aggressive.

"Match Point" Is Sexy.

It's A Sexy, Sexy Movie.

You Know What I Mean?

I Mean --
I Mean, It's More Sexual

Than Anything From Guys
Half His Age.

This Can't
Lead Anyplace.

Johansson: It's Funny,
Because When We Were Shooting

"Match Point," We Shot That
Scene In The Wheat Field,

And It's Pouring Rain,

And I'm, Of Course,
Allergic To Wheat.

Woody Knows This And Thinks
It's Hilarious, I'm Sure.

I'm Dying And Sinus-Y
And Mucous-Y

And Itchy And Feeling
Not Sexy At All.

Not To Mention The Fact
That Jonathan Rhys Meyers

Totally Split My Lip
In The Middle Of The Scene

With His Tooth.

Woody Would Say Things Like,
"It Looked -- It Looked --

"No, I Saw The Dailies The Other
Day, And They Were Good.

"Very -- I-I Liked -- I Think
It's -- I Think It's --

I Think It's Working.
I Think It's Working."

You Know, And You're Just Like,
"Okay, Woody, I--

"Well, If You Think
It's Working, Then It Means

We Don't Have To Do Any Reshoots
Of That Last Scene."

It Was One Of The Best Summers
Of My Life Shooting That Movie.

I Had Such An Incredible Time.

And Part Of That Was Really Just
Forming A Friendship With Woody.

We Just Were Two Peas In A Pod.

I Feel Very Lucky

To Be Sitting On
This Couch With --

With A Proven Genius.

You Know, I Wear The Mantle
Of Greatness With Humility.

I Mean, I Think You Have To.

It Is Lonely At The Top.
Whoever Said That Knew.

You Know,
Maybe If She Was --

If I Was A Little
Less Intelligent,

Or Maybe She Was Slightly
Brighter Or Something...

Or If You Had Kind Of Brown --
More Brownish Hair.

Yeah, Maybe If I Had
Brownish Hair Or If I Was --

You Know, Who Knows What
Would Have Happened?

Scarlett, You Know,
Is A Crippler.

But Like Any Artist,
You Have To Say Something.

It Can't All Be Technique.

And With Scarlett

And Pen?lope,
They're Saying Something.

I Thought We Could Go For A Ride
To The Countryside Later.

I Mean, You Know,
The Weather Is Beautiful.

[ Speaking Spanish ]

In English.

Oh, No, It's Fine.

You Speak No Spanish?

No, I-I, Uh,
Studied Chinese.

Chinese?

Why?

When We Were In Barcelona,

And They Took Pen?lope
And Javier And Whatever,

They Were So Worried
About Getting Fired.

I Kept On Saying,
"Don't Worry About It.

"You Two Are So Great.

You Know, You Don't Have
Anything To Worry About."

That Was Their Main Concern,

'Cause Woody Has
That Reputation.

[ Arguing In Spanish ]

Cruz: He Completely Trusted
Javier And I

With The Translation
From The English To Spanish,

Because We Did
The Translation Ourselves,

And We Improvised So Much.

And He Was Always Walking
Around The Set --

"I Have No Idea What These Two
Are Saying, But I Trust Them."

I Don't Know What They Said.

I Mean, They Could
Have Been Talking About,

You Know, Building
An Atomic Bomb Or Something.

I Mean, I Just Know The Movie
Seemed To Go Over With People,

So They Must Have Been Doing
Something Correct.

Is It Reasonable Of Me
To Ask You

If You Will Both Join Me
In My Room?

I'm Engaged To Be Married.

I Have A Handsome, Lovely Fianc?
Who I Make Love With

And Also Holds A Very Real
Place In My Heart,

And To Be Perfectly Frank,
Juan Antonio,

If I Were The Type Of Person
That Played Around,

I Don't Think
It's In The Cards For Us.

And You?

I'll Go To Your Room, But...

You Have To Seduce Me.

He Loves Women,
He Appreciates Women.

He Has Written Some Of The Best
Female Characters Of All Time.

And I Love How Well
He Knows Neurotic Women.

I Know I'm Not
Going To Settle

Till I Find What
I'm Looking For.

Which Is What?

Um...

Something Else.

I Want Something Different,
Something More,

Some Sort Of...

Counterintuitive Love.

Meaning?

Meaning...

[ Chuckling ] I Don't Know.

I Don't Know What I Want.

I Only Know
What I Don't Want.

And If You Don't Start
Undressing Me Soon,

This Is Going To Turn Into
A Panel Discussion.

Feeney: He's Cast That Scene
So Perfectly

That Those Two Actors
Can Bring Off Their Own Heat,

But They Also Are Very
Comfortable With The Braininess

Of The Things They're Saying.

It Feels Like
A Much Younger Filmmaker

Because It Feels So Immediate.

But It's Also Somebody In
His 70s Knowing What Love Is,

Knowing What Attraction Is,

And Being Able
To Represent It Well.

You Age, But You Don't --

Until You're Really
Put Out Of Commission,

You Can Still Do That Stuff,
And You Know What To Say,

And You Know What They Say
In Retaliation All The Time.

So, I Haven'T Reached
The Age Yet

Where All That's Behind Me.

But There Will Come A Day When
I'll Just Be Able To Say,

"What? What?

Can You Move Your Lips?
What?"

You Know. [Laughs]

And Then -- Then I Won'T --

I Won'T Be Able To Do
Those Scenes In My Life,

So I Won'T Be Able
To Write Them So Well.

There Are A Lot Of Surprises
That Happen Between Writing It,

Doing It, And Seeing It
On The Screen.

Most Surprises Are Negative.

Most Surprises Are That You
Thought Something

Was Good Or Funny,
And It's Not.

I've Made Just About
40 Films In My Life,

And So Few Of Them Have Really
Been Worth Anything

Because It's Not Easy.

If It Was Easy,
It Wouldn'T Be Fun,

It Wouldn'T Be Valuable.

Mcgrath: He Gave Me This Theory
That Stayed With Me Ever Since,

And I Thought
It Was Really Great.

He Said, "Every Movie Has
A Sort Of Amount Of Time

That An Audience Will Sit
For That Story."

So He Is Ruthless About Looking
At Everything And Saying,

"It's Good, But Not Good Enough.
It's Out."

Let'S Run Through It
A Little Bit.

I Thought Just The Sparkler
And The Test Tubes.

Man: You Want To Go Back

And Make Some More
Of Those Others Then?

Yeah, Let'S Go Back.

Let'S Trim The Cut
Before That.

I Would Just Use That
And That's It.

I Wouldn'T Use Anything
After That.

I'd Move In To That And Lose
All The Footage After That.

Allen: When I First
Started Editing,

We Edited With A Movieola,

Which Is Really, Uh,
Like An Old Model T.

And We Spliced,
And The Film Was Spliced,

And We Looked At It,

And All Those Films
Got Made On Movieolas

And Steenbecks For Decades.

And They Were Fine,
They Were No Problem.

And It Was More Tedious,
And It Would Take Weeks.

Now I Can Edit A Picture
In Four Or Five Days,

From A Technical Point Of View,
Without A Problem

Because My Editor
Is Punching In Keys,

And It Goes Very, Very Fast.

But, You Know,
There's A Big Difference

Between What You Set Out To Make

And What You Make
Almost Every Time.

Man: Her Ex-Husband,
Alfie Shepridge.

He Awoke In The Middle
Of The Night,

Thought About Eternity,
Broke Out In A Sweat,

And It's Been Jogging
And Health Foods Ever Since.

Is That The Best -- Is That
The Best One We Have On Him

Or Do We Have --
Do We Have A More --

Angles.

Let'S Just Check And See If
We Have An Angrier One.

Just The "That's Enough"
Would Do It.

So It's A Fast Cut
To Him.

[ Speaking In Reverse ]

That's Enough.
Stop It.

All Right.
That's A Little Bit Better.

You Know, By The Time You Get
The Thing Together,

It's Such A Mess,

And You're Flitting
Around The Editing Room

Making All Sorts Of Compromises
And Saying,

"Oh, Gee, If I Put
The Last Scene First

"And The Middle Scene, You Know,
At The End Of The Picture

"And Get A Narrator
And Use Dissolves

"And Do Opticals,
And Put This In Slow Motion

And Use Titles Here."

And You're Struggling
For Survival.

And I Still Screw Up
A Lot Of The Times.

So That's Why I've Often Said --

And It Sounds Facetious,
But I'm Serious --

That The Only Thing Standing
Between Greatness And Me Is Me.

You Know, There Is No Excuse.

Man: My Question Is
For Mr. Woody Allen.

Your Film Says Many Things
About Death,

So I'd Like To Ask, How Is Your
Relationship With Death Now?

My Relationship With Death
Remains The Same.

I'm Strongly Against It

And, Um...

[ Laughter ]

[ Applause ]

Aronson: Woody Is Not Happy
To Have To Promote The Films.

He Doesn't Like
Doing Interviews,

And He Also Is A Big Believer

That None Of The Publicity
Ever Helps.

Woody Complains

About Doing
The Red Carpet In Cannes

Or In Any Festival
Or Any Premiere That We Have.

You Know,
It's A Brief Period Of Time,

And I Don't Think It's As
Terrible As He Likes To Portray.

The Whole Thing

Is A Psychological
Nightmare For Me,

But My Wife Likes Cannes,

The Kids Like Cannes.

The Distributors Of The Film,
It's Very Important To Them.

And So, You Know, I Do It.

It's A Surreal,
Preposterous Thing,

Because There's No Experience
In Reality

Where You're In A Tuxedo
And You're Walking Up

A Red Carpet.

Hundreds And Hundreds
Of People

Are Screaming Your Name,
And Flashbulbs Going Off.

This Doesn't Happen
To A Schoolteacher

Or A College Professor,
Or A Doctor Or -- You Know.

It Has No Reality To It.

Woody!

Woody!

Woody!

Woody!

Woody!

We'll Be
Passing Among Them,

Throwing Some Raw Meat
In A Little While.

[ Laughs ]

I've Always Been A Performer,
As Well,

So, For Me, It's Not Difficult.

I Can Address, You Know,

200 People Or 100 People

And Sit At Round Tables
With People Doing Interviews.

You Know, I'm Used To It.

And I'm Used To Doing
Two And Three Shows A Night

And Doing Nightclubs
And, So, You Know,

It's Not --
Not So Difficult For Me.

Man: Woody Allen!

Allen: When You Go
To A Screening

Like Here In Cannes,
The People Are Friendly,

They're Rooting For You.

They Love You.

They're, You Know,
In A Festive Mood,

And They're Here To See Films.

And So The Fact That They're
Clapping And All Of That,

And The Stars Of The Film
That They've Just Seen

Are Right There Live,
And They Stand Up.

Of Course They're Going
To Be Supportive

Just Out Of Common Politeness.

You Have To Learn Not
To Take That Seriously.

Well, It Was A Completely
Fake Reaction By The Audience.

They Faked It Very Well?

They Faked It, Yeah.
They're Good At That.

That's How They Keep
The Festival Going.

Allen: Nobody Ever Comes Up
To You And Says Anything Bad,

So You Learn To Disregard
All The Compliments That You Get

Because They Never
Mean Anything.

Yeah, Germany Loves You.

Oh. Who, Gemma?

Germany.

Oh, Germany!
The Entire Country?

Entire Country.

Great.
A Lot Of People.

A Lot Of People.

I'd Love To Come Up
With An Idea

That Pleased Multitudes

And, You Know, Huge Swarms
Of People Turned Out

And Saw The Picture Two
And Three Times,

And It Broke Box Office Records,

But I Don't Think That's Ever
Going To Happen In My Lifetime.

Tenenbaum: "Midnight In Paris"
Has Gone On To Be

The Largest Grossing Movie

That Woody Allen Has Ever Had,

Worldwide As Well
As In America.

At The Present Time,

"Midnight In Paris" Has Crossed
The $50 Million Mark

In Box Office.

Worldwide,
It's At About $106 Million.

So My Guess Is We'll Be
Well Above $120,

$125 Million
Before We'Re Done.

Wilson: It's Like It's A Smash.

It's Like He's Michael Bay
All Of A Sudden.

[ Laughs ]

I Don't Think He Has
A Great Expectation

Of His Movies Are Going To,
You Know, Make Much Money Here.

I Think A Lot Of It's The Title.

He Said That He Came Up With
The Title "Midnight In Paris"

Before He Had Any Story.

And So, You Know, People Love,
You Know, That City,

And It Has Such A Hold On
People'S Imagination.

And It's Gotten
Some Good Reviews,

And So It Seems Like People
Are Turning Out For This One.

What Are You Doing?

I Don't Know.

I...

I Did Feel, For A Minute
There While I Was Doing It,

Like I Was Immortal.

But You Look So Sad.

Because Life
Is Too Mysterious.

This Is The Time
We Live In.

Everything Moves So Fast,

And Life Is Noisy
And Complicated.

Allen: It's A Happy Accident,

Because You Try And Make
A Good Film Every Time Out.

And For Some Reason,
"Midnight In Paris"

Was Affectionately
Embraced By People.

I Think That's What They Are.

Aronson: I Do Believe

This Is The Happiest
I've Ever Known Woody.

He's In A Good Relationship,
He Has Two Lovely Children,

He's Very Devoted To Them.

He Seems To Enjoy His Life.

He's Doing The Work
That He Likes.

This Is Definitely
The Happiest I've Seen Him.

I Love That His Father
Lived To Be 100

And His Mother
Lived To Be 96,

Because He's Clearly Taking
Great Care Of Himself Anyway,

And With Those Kind Of Genes,
It Means That We Might Have

Woody Allen At The Age Of 105
Still Making A Film A Year.

Gloomy As He Is About
The Prospects Of Immortality,

I Think He Has A Fair Chance,

With A Handful Of Other
Filmmakers Of Roughly His Time,

To Have A Nice Little Place
In History.

I Have Referred To Woody Allen
In The Past As Albert Camus,

As Comedian.

Camus Said,
"I Do Not Want To Die.

"I Do Not Want
Anyone I Love To Die.

"I Am Going To Die, And Everyone
I Love Is Going To Die,

And That Makes Life Absurd."

And Woody Believes That,
But He's Able To Weave In Humor.

Now, I Think It Probably Does
Make It A Bit More Palatable.

But I Would Want To Ask Him,
If Life Really Is Absurd

And Horrible And Brutal,
Why Are We Laughing?

But Shouldn'T
I Stop Making Movies

And Do Something
That Counts,

Like Helping Blind People

Or Becoming A Missionary
Or Something?

Let Me Tell You,
You're Not The Missionary Type.

You'D Never Last.

And Incidentally,
You're Also Not Superman.

You're A Comedian.

You Want To Do Mankind
A Real Service?

Tell Funnier Jokes!

Yeah, But I-I've Got
To Find Meaning.

Allen: When I Look Back
On My Life,

I've Been Very Lucky
That I've Lived Out

All These Childhood Dreams.

I Wanted To Be A Movie Actor,
And I Became One.

I Wanted To Be A Movie Director
And A Comedian, I Became One.

I Wanted To Play Jazz
In New Orleans,

And I Played In Street Parades
And Joints In New Orleans

And Played In Opera Houses
And Concerts All Over The World.

There Was Nothing In
My Life That I Aspired Toward

That Hasn't Come Through For Me.

But Despite
All These Lucky Breaks,

Why Do I Still Feel
That I Got Screwed Somehow?

[ Laughs ]

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