American Horror Story (2011–…): Season 3, Episode 7 - The Dead - full transcript

Fiona finds new purpose in a dangerous love affair. A night out with LaLaurie leads Queenie to question her place in the Coven. Cordelia makes a fateful decision about her mother.

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[TOTO'S "ROSANNA" PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]

KYLE [SINGING]:
Meet you all the way, yeah!
Ripped By mstoll

Take you all the way

Der-ner-ner-ner

Rosanna, yeah

Take you all the way

Hoo-hoo-hoo

Oh, yeah

Take you all the way
Oh, yeah

Seriously, Toto is amazing.

Toto sucktitude.
I will not argue about this, bro.



Toto is amazeballs.

Shut up about your incredibly gay crush on
your incredibly gay band and get over here.

Seriously. Kyle, what are you gonna get?

Come on, check mine out.

KYLE: Let's see.
It means "beginning and end."

[GRUNTS]

Most of those don't mean
what the chart on the wall says they mean.

You might have "I'm a fricking idiot."

You're gonna go out for Chinese food
in a pair of shorts...

...and the staff is gonna be
laughing their asses off.

[CHUCKLES]

BILLY: What the hell does "beginning
and end" mean, even if that is what it says?

It's my life philosophy.
It means "live right goddamn now."

You're full of shit.
ALL: Ha-ha-ha.



Seriously, Kyle, get something.
No, dude. My morn would kill me.

That's cool. I'd totally bang her
to take her mind off it. Ha-ha-ha.

[CHUCKLES]

No, I got plans.

I'm not gonna grow up and work for Daddy
or sell pot to undergrads all my life.

You guys know why
the levees broke during Katrina?

The little Dutch boy ran out of fingers?

The levees were built
by the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.

But they built them for shit.

And where I'm from still hasn't recovered,
and probably never will.

What does a tattoo
have to do with Katrina?

I'm gonna be an engineer.

And I'm gonna make sure shit like that
never happens again.

I don't wanna walk into some meeting
with a mayor, roll up my sleeves...

...and have a Saints logo or Wile E. Coyote
or anything that's gonna make him think...

...that I'm anything
other than his knight in shining armor.

I got one life, and I'm not wasting it.

It's a pretty cool idea, Kyle.
Thank you, Jimmy.

Yeah, I do too. That's why I wanna wish you
the luck of the Irish.

Didn't know you were Irish.
BILLY: I'm not.

You're a little bitch. Heh.
BILLY: It looks good, right?

[WHIMPERING]

[GRUNTING]

[SOBBING]

[SCREAMS]

[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

KYLE: I...

Wha--?

What am I?

MANSON:
I am a millennial.

Generation Y.

Born between the birth of AIDS and 9/11,
give or take.

They call us the Global Generation.

We are known for our entitlement
and narcissism.

Some say it's because
we're the first generation...

...where every kid gets a trophy
for showing up.

Others think it's because social media
allows us to post every time we fart...

...or have a sandwich
for all the world to see.

But it seems that our one defining trait
is a numbness to the world...

...an indifference to suffering.

I know I did anything I could to not feel.

Sex, drugs, booze.
Just take away the pain.

Take away my mother and my asshole father
and the press...

...and all the boys I loved
who wouldn't love me back.

Hell, I was gang-raped. Two days later,
I was back in class like nothing happened.

Must have hurt like hell, right?

Most people never get over stuff like that.
I was like, "Let's go for Jamba Juice."

[GLASS SHATTERS]

I would give everything I have, or will
ever have, just to feel pain again, to hurt.

Thank God for minor-league Fiona
and her herb garden.

One advantage of being dead
is you don't have to sweat warning labels.

There was this one brown liquid...

...that I thought made
my nipples tingle for a second...

...but I think it was psychosomatic,
I polished off the rest and didn't feel shit.

I tried every eye of newt and wing of fly...

...until I found something that made me not
look like Marilyn Manson anymore.

[SIGHS]

And that's the rub of all this, isn't it?

I can't feel shit.

I can't feel anything.

We think that pain is the worst feeling.

It isn't.

How can anything be worse
than this eternal silence inside of me?

I used to not eat for days or eat like crazy
and then stick my fingers down my throat.

Now, no matter how much I binge,
I can't fill this hole inside me.

I can't take it anymore.

I think I'm going batshit.

I need to do something.

[KYLE WHIMPERING]

Hey.

[KYLE SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY]

You know how this has to go, right?

[KYLE MUTTERING]

You were a great guy, Kyle.

But you died. And I didn't
let you go when I should have.

I don't understand my power yet.

It's new.

I used it to bring you back.

You killed your mother, Kyle.

[SOBBING]

There's only one way left to fix this.

[KYLE YELLING]

[KYLE SCREAMS & ZOE GASPS]

No!

[BOTH YELLING]

No!

[SOBBING]

I don't want you to die.

QUEENIE:
Nothing. Goddamn nothing.

[QUEENIE MUMBLING]

I heard a noise.

Thought we had vermin.

Ain't no self-respecting rat gonna live here.
Ain't nothing to eat.

Nonsense.

These larders are bursting to full.

Well, that is disappointing.

I was feeling a tad peckish myself.

MAN [OVER SPEAKER]:
Welcome to Frostop. May I take your order?

Who said that?
Girl, relax. It's just a guy at the window.

Let me get two Jumping Jacks with cheese,
two fries, large, and two strawberry cyclones.

MAN: Would you care to
super-size your order for $1. 99?

Do we dare?

[CHUCKLES]

QUEENIE:
Hell, yeah.

DELPHINE:
Lord in heaven, the most delicious food...

...I have eaten in my entire life.

And that's saying something.
Ha, ha.

I know, right?

I'm starting to understand
why you're so enormous.

You're not exactly svelte yourself, okay?
I didn't mean to give offense.

Yeah, but you do, Miss Daisy.

All the damn time.

It's this century.

It still does perplex me so.

You think I'm any less perplexed?

I dragged my ass all the way here from
Detroit to be with my, quote, "sister witches."

And instead,
I'm sitting in a fast-food parking lot...

...at 3 in the morning
with an immortal racist.

How'd that happen?

Those girls, they're never gonna
see you as their sister.

Let me guess. Because I'm fat?

No, ma chère.

Because you're black.
Black as coal.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?
Shit, it's late.

Hank.

I miss you, baby. I wanna come home.

Go to bed, Hank.

I'll see you soon, baby.

CORDELIA:
Delphine?

Delphine?

[DOOR CLOSES]

Delphine?

[DOOR CREAKS]

Spalding?

Who is it?

I know you're there.

MADISON: Whoa, whoa. Hold it there.
CORDELIA: Madison.

FIONA: I know.
I was standing where you're standing.

MADISON: Just stop yelling at me!
FIONA: Do it! Do it!

[BOTH GASP]

CORDELIA:
Oh, my God.

[GASPS]

Fiona.

[DOOR OPENS]

I wasn't expecting company.

Heh, I wasn't expecting
Buckingham Palace.

A woman like yourself deserves
to be surrounded by beauty and grace.

[FATS FITZGERALD AND THE PLAYBOYS'
"HAUNTED BLUES" PLAYING]

Sit down.

All I have to offer is some decent bourbon,
and hopefully good company.

"The reason for living was to get ready
to stay dead a long time."

Faulkner.

As I Lay Dying.

I get it.

You're not just any old broke-down sax man,
you're a college-educated one.

I've led a solitary life.

[FIONA CHUCKLES]

Come on, you don't really
expect me to believe that.

You know, when I was coming up in
the clubs, musicians weren't so respected.

Hmm.
They were considered poor, indigent.

I had to be content, uh,
being a backdoor man...

...never invited to stay the night.

It's more dangerous that way.

Yeah.

And you like danger.

I can tell that about you.

And I like it.

Who's he?

We call him Prince.

Prince of the ivories.

I hope you understand, Fiona,
that this is a rare night.

A celestial creature like yourself, uh,
gracing this humble abode.

In short...

...hot damn.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

You're gonna have to excuse me
a minute.

AXEMAN:
It's not very inviting in there.

AXEMAN:
Another bourbon?

Absolutely.

AXEMAN:
ls the bourbon smooth enough?

Heh. Women don't usually like
a harsh whiskey.

Well, don't assume anything about me.
My taste in whiskey or men.

May I assume that
you'd like to kiss me?

This was a mistake.

I ran out of sleeping pills.

It was a bad idea.
Don't go.

This is not just a one-night stand.

That is exactly what it is,
a one-night stand.

It could be our destiny.

Oh, no. Heh.

Do you actually think my destiny is here
in this roach-infested shithole?

Life is full of surprises.

Well, I've had enough surprises
for two lifetimes.

I'm through with surprises.
Were you surprised you wanted to kiss me?

[SCOFFS]

FIONA:
No, you don't want anything to do with me.

I am a wretched human being.

A miserable, mean goddamn bitch.
I always have been.

I've had three husbands.

I've destroyed every decent relationship
I have ever had...

...including one with my daughter.

Love transforms.
Oh, come on, you don't believe in love.

AXEMAN:
Okay, let's table love, then.

What about sex?

Good old-fashioned great sex.

[FIONA CHUCKLES]

AXEMAN:
That's why I took up the saxophone.

You really are good with the ladies.

Oh, I'm good.
Ha, ha.

The joke was, they always
watched the bass player.

But they should've watched my fingers
on the keys.

[FIONA GIGGLES]

[PLAYING JAZZ MUSIC]

My body in perfect synchronization.

[GIGGLES]

An extension of my instrument.

No effort at all, just one with it.

Now, the way my lips and tongue
wrapped around my instrument...

...was impeccable.

My embouchure, heh...
Ha-ha-ha.

...that's how I calibrate...

...hit those clear, high notes.

[GASPS]

I wanna trust you, Kyle.

You need to learn
how to communicate.

When you're hungry,
when you're tired, when...

When you feel like
you might do something bad.

When you're hungry,
I want you to say "food."

Food.

"Food?

Good.

When you're tired, you can say...

You can say "bed."

Not...

...stupid.

I know you're not.

You're not stupid.

Everything you know, it--

It's stuck in your head.

I'm trying to help you
so you can function like a person.

Aah! No!

[KYLE GRUNTING]

Stop.

Stop it.
Jesus, who's this?

ZOE:
Don't you remember?

It's Kyle.

We used a spell,
brought him back to life?

You killed him.

Oh, uh, Cordelia wants to see you.

Uh, actually, that would be impossible,
but she does wanna talk.

She knows you're alive?
She knows a lot more than you think. Go.

I'll take care of him.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[KYLE GRUNTS]

Looks like we had to put you
back together.

Lucky I picked out all the best pieces.

[YELLS]

You were dead.

So was I.

I didn't see a light, did you?

Mine was cold and dark...

...and then nothing.

But we both came back.

To this.

Somehow, it feels more empty here.

You know exactly how I feel.

You've been wondering
if it was worth the trouble.

And I've been wondering
that same thing.

You say you're leavin'

I'll check on you, all right?

MARIE: Here, Walter.
You got some good ones for me today?

[CHUCKLES]

MARIE:
Ooh. Yeah. Give me three of them.

Ha, ha. Are you gonna come in?

Or you just gonna stare
from the doorway, Queenie?

How do you know my name?

Black witch come to town,
I'm gonna hear about it.

Surprised it took you this long
to come see me.

You doing some kind of voodoo
with them fish heads?

It's Sunday night.

I'm making gumbo.

I never even had gumbo.

Not surprised. Living over there
in Wonder Bread land.

They probably feed you Shake 'N Bake
and watermelon for dessert. Hmm.

They don't care that I'm black.

I just think that
they just don't like me.

Oh, they care plenty. Heh.

Their power is built
on the sweat of our backs.

The only reason you and I
are in this country...

...is because our great-great-grandpas
couldn't run fast enough.

We'll never be welcome here.

And those witches are the worst.

They're not so bad.

No? Even right now,
they got evil sleeping under their roof...

...eating alongside of them.

I locked that horror in a box
and buried her in the ground.

Fiona Goode digs her up,
gives her a warm bed and three meals a day.

Delphine?

Fiona made her my slave.

Slave's too good for her.

You heard the stories, I'm sure.

That ain't the half of it.

Ask her what she done.
You ask her.

Then you see.

You wanna come live with us?

With your own people?

The price of admission
is Madame Delphine LaLaurie.

Bring her to me,
and you will have a home.

I never said I wanted to come join you.

Voodoo doll belong
in the house of voodoo.

And I know you didn't cross the line
and break the truce for no bowl of gumbo.

Every man, woman and child in this house
know what it feel like...

...to have to live as second best
to some pretty little white girl.

You come here, and you ain't never
gotta feel that way again.

More than that...

...you mix your witch with our voodoo...

...and even the Supreme
won't be able to touch you.

I should get back.

What are you gonna do to her?

If I bring Delphine to you?

Oh, don't you worry about that, child.

Now, you just get you home
before it get dark.

You go into the hospital, and you wonder
if you'll ever come out again.

You come out and you wonder:

"Goddamn,
what have I been doing all these years?"

Tea?
No, thank you.

I would say everything is different now...

...but it's not.

Everything around here
is exactly the same.

Only difference is...

...now I see it.

The Axeman was a bad spirit.

You not only brought him here,
you sent him packing...

...which means you are
one hot-shit witch.

Power like yours
does not go unnoticed.

Which means you've got a bull's-eye
on your back, kiddo...

...and our biggest enemy is locked,
loaded and looking at you.

Marie Laveau.

My mother.
But she's on our side.

Fiona Goode has been on the same side
her whole life, her own.

Now, I don't know if you are
the next Supreme, nobody does...

...but if she jumps to that conclusion,
right or wrong...

...she will slit your throat
just like she did to Madison.

Nobody knows who killed Madison,
not even Madison.

She doesn't, but I do.

My mother killed her because she thought
Madison was the next leader of our coven.

She wanted to absorb her power,
her life force.

So if she even thinks you're next...

...you're next.

Holy shit.
Right?

Fiona is fading, growing weaker.

Which only makes
her more dangerous.

A wounded animal will
rip you apart if it's cornered.

So, what do we do?

CORDELIA:
It's simple.

We're going to kill my mother.

Kill her once, kill her good...

...kill her dead.

[KYLE GRUNTING]

Where do you think you're going?

We've only just begun. Heh.
Heh.

You know, it was a charming evening,
but, uh, that dead body in your bathtub...

...is going to start putting off
some very noxious odors soon.

Just a few fumes.

You're no angel.
Heh.

Although you always did have someone
tidy up after you, didn't you?

You know, it was fun,
our little romantic game...

...but I've called the police,
and they're gonna be coming shortly.

Oh, you'd never do that.

You hate the coppers.

We're one and the same, you and me.

When was the last time
that your body made a light show, huh?

My guess is never.

Oh, you're afraid.

You're afraid of your own pleasure.

It makes you feel weak...

...like you need somebody.

That's why you're going.
You're drawing ridiculous conclusions.

I don't even know your name,
and I don't care to.

Oh, you don't know me,
but there's nothing I don't know about you.

Your secrets,
your dreams, everything.

I've been watching over you
since you were 8 years old.

[GIRLS SCREAMING]

You think you're special, little witch?

What's your name?

Fiona Goode.
HELEN: Do you know what happens...

...to scrawny little girls
who stick their heads up above others?

They get it chopped off.
I'm not afraid of you, Helen.

Pick it up.

Now hold the glass above your head.

You know what to do.

No!

You little shit.

FIONA:
No.

[GIRLS LAUGHING]

[GIRLS SCREAM]

That was you?
That bully had it coming.

I knew I didn't do it.

Why did you help me?

Who are you?

What are you?

At first, I saw you
as the daughter that I never had.

I wanted to protect my little flower.

But you are no hothouse orchid.

There's nothing fragile about you, Fiona.

As you...

As you grew,
I began to see the fire in your belly...

...and the steel running down your back.

You were the most fearsome thing
that ever lived.

And while others
only saw the ruthless manipulator...

...I saw so, so much more.

And my feelings became complicated.

And I fell in love.

But not like a father.

Like a man.

I don't believe in ghosts.

Nor did I feel like one.

I felt like I was locked
in an airless closet for eternity.

And when you arrived, you gave meaning
to my endless, tortured days.

All I wanna do is give you pleasure.
You deserve it.

Baby, you've lived through so much.

[FIONA MOANS]

[AXEMAN GRUNTS]

Jesus Christ.

You call that a seduction, huh?

What an idiot, telling me my life story.

How you watched me grow old.

What was that, a mercy lay?

It was a culmination.

Zip me UP-

No.

You keep your distance, lover boy.

Go haunt someone else's life.

[GASPS]

Hey, Spalding.

How are you feeling?
Fine.

I feel fine.

How am I...?

Whose tongue is this?

Yours.

I found it the other day, hidden away.

I didn't realize what it was.

I mean,a severed tongue
stored away for 40 years?

You'd think it'd be shriveled up
like a slice of beef jerky by now.

[GASPS]

But it wasn't.

It was wet, alive...

...because someone enchanted it.

Isn't that right?

Yes.

ZOE:
"M. S."

Myrtle Snow.

She wanted you to tell the truth.

But that was the last thing
you wanted to do.

So you cut it out of your own head.

Answer me!
Yes.

But you didn't know that she kept it.

But Myrtle wasn't witch enough
to restore it.

But I'm not Myrtle.

[ZOE SPEAKING INCANTATION
IN LATIN]

[BLOWS]

[CHUCKLES]

Tsk.

What do you want from me? Heh.

The only thing that you can't refuse me.

The truth. Did you kill
Madison Montgomery?

[GRUNTS]

Madison Montgomery...

...is alive.

That wasn't the question.

No!

I didn't kill her.

But you know who did.

Yes...

...I do.

Say the name.

[GRUNTS]

Please don't make me.

Say the name.

[GROANING]

Say it.

Fiona.

Fiona Goode.

I say her name.

I bless it.

As long as there is a tongue in this head,
I will say it. I will always say her name.

Fiona Goode!

Our Supreme.

She's not your Supreme, Spalding.

She's your employer.

You're not a part of this coven.

My family has served this coven...

...for 10 generations.

I have devoted my life to it.

Not anymore.

[SPALDING GROANING]

You're done talking.

Care for a nibble?

I'm not here for that.

I need to ask you something.

What's the worst thing you ever did?

The past is best left buried.

I feel like maybe we have a connection.

And my mama always said
that in order to be a true friend...

...you have to see the ugly
to appreciate the good.

You think we could be true friends?

I perhaps had one slight regret.

DELPHINE:
Sally.

I've missed your presence
for the last fortnight.

Rumor has it that you gave birth
to a baby.

Yes, ma'am, a healthy baby boy.

Oh, Ida says he's beautiful
with a complexion as light as cream.

What's the boy's name?

Haven't settled on one yet, ma'am.
DELPHINE: Mm.

LOUIS: I've always been fond of Pierre
as a boy's name.

Have you, now?

Kitchen's too hard for a new mother.

Now that Borquita is serving her
punishment, I need a new handmaiden.

Would you come to my boudoir tonight?
Help me with my beauty treatments?

SALLY:
Yes, ma'am.

Thank you, ma'am.

[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]

This little jar came all the way from Paris.

Madame Lafayette swore
it took 10 years off her face.

I could've saved a fortune
if I'd only seen the bitch in broad daylight.

They're all worthless.

Every single one.

Except this.

My own concoction.

The formulation of which
I will carry with me to my grave.

Let's play a game.

Can you guess
one of the secret ingredients?

It looks like blood, ma'am.

Very good.

You're a smart girl.

But this batch is extra special.

Can you guess why?

Came from a boy.

Newly born.

Youth begets youth.

I know who's been between your legs, whore.

You needn't bother
to give that baby a name.

[WHIMPERS]

You didn't.

Couldn't have a high yellow bastard
growing up in my house...

...laying claim to our fortune.

The poor girl, next morning
she threw herself off the balcony.

Cracked her head open on the pavement.

Cracked it open like an egg.

We buried her with her baby.

It was the right thing to do.

You have no idea
what doing the right thing even means.

I'm learning, Queenie.

You must understand.

It wasn't only a different time.

It was a different world.

I'm just...

I'm grateful...

...to have someone.

A true friend to guide me.

[GRUNTS]

[BUZZING]

What have you been up to?
Nothing. Do you mind?

MADISON:
No, I don't mind.

But you do.
What are we talking about?

Come on, Zoe.
What you walked in on before.

None of my business.
You brought the dude back from the dead.

You must like him a little.

Brought you back too.

Starting to wish you hadn't?

Look, it's not like we can be together
anyways.

Why not?

It's gonna be different with Kyle.

He already died once. It'll take more than
just that thing between your legs to kill him.

Don't be disgusting.
Heh.

So, what?

You're done with him?

Not even close.

Being with him is the only time I felt
anything since I came back.

I'm not giving him up.

But that doesn't mean you have to either.

Right.

We'll just take turns.

Come here.

[BAND PLAYING JAZZ MUSIC]

[CROWD CHEERING]

Can I buy you a drink?

Yeah.

DELPHINE:
I must confess...

...my nerves do flutter a bit
when I think of changing my hair stylings.

Girl, you had that same old stanky hairstyle
for over 150 years.

It's time to switch it up, okay?

Oh...

[GASPS]

Oh!

Hello?

We're here.

Ah.

MARIE:
Madame LaLaurie.

Welcome back.

It's been such a long time.

No.

You don't know this woman.

What she'll do to me.

QUEENIE:
Yes, I do.

It's the reason I brought you here,
you dumb bitch.

No.

No.

No! No!

No!

No!

No! Please!

Please! No!

MARI E:
Ma chérie...

...it's been such a busy day.

I forgot to apply my Retin-A.

You care to make the first cut?

I'd love to.

Wha--? No.

You stay away from me.

You stay away from me, you hear me?

[IN DISTORTED VOICE]
You stay away!

Beautiful.
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