American Horror Story (2011–…): Season 2, Episode 2 - Tricks and Treats - full transcript

(screaming)

Leo, Leo, come on, get up.

(whimpering)

(screaming)

Help me!

(screaming)

(loud bang reverberates)

Don't answer it.

There's a killer of women
on the loose.

(pounding)

They caught that guy.



Threw him in the nuthouse.

In Briarcliff.

He's in there with Lana.

I have to recant.

I'm recanting tomorrow.

That might be tough.

You signed a document.

Not that anyone would blame you.

(sobbing): I'm gonna be sick.

(loud knocking)

Lois, don't.

You don't know who's out there.

(door opens)

CHILDREN: Trick or treat.



Check out the mass murderers, Barb.

WENDY: Is today Halloween?

LOIS:
Tomorrow. These little monsters

are just getting a jump
on the competition.

(crying):
I don't have any candy.

That's okay, Miss Peyser.

We'll come back tomorrow.

God, the job, the kids,

Halloween...

Nothing makes sense without her.

I just hate myself.

Hey, you want me to stay over tonight?

No, I-I'll be okay.

I just need a hot shower

and a good night's sleep.

And tomorrow I'm gonna get her
out of that place.

You can say that you made a mistake.

You got scared
and you hit the panic button.

I have to get her out.

♪ ♪

♪ Wishing and hoping ♪

♪ And thinking and praying ♪

♪ Planning and dreaming ♪

♪ His kiss is the start ♪

♪ That won't get you into his heart ♪

♪ So if you're thinking how great ♪

♪ True love is ♪

♪ All you've got to do is ♪

♪ Hold him and kiss him
and squeeze him ♪

♪ And love him, yeah, just do it ♪

♪ And after you do ♪

♪ You will be his ♪

♪ You will be his ♪

♪ You will be his. ♪

(screams)

I'm... I'm a schoolteacher.

The children...
they won't understand.

(buzzer sounds, door clanks open)

(knocking)

MAN:
Everybody, up and out! Now!

(woman screaming)

Come on, stand out in the hall.

(knocking)

Room search, Miss Winters.

We find it keeps our charges honest.

Food violation.

Oh, Pepper.

Now, tell me, why is it we don't allow

food in the rooms?

Rats! That's right, Pepper.

Why can't you get that through
your pointy little head?

Huh? SHELLEY: Hey, Sister.

I have a cucumber in my room.

But not because I was hungry.

Stifle yourself, Shelley.
I'll be with you in a minute.

Find anything, Frank?

No, looks clean to me.

Check the pillowcase.

FRANK: Uh-huh.

Here we are. (Chuckles)

What do we have here?

"October 28.

Strip-searched and deloused.
Denied phone call."

Who would you like to
call, Miss Winters?

The American Civil Lesbians Union?

My editor knows I came here
to write a story.

And, boy, do I have
a great scoop for him now.

Ah, yes. You know,
I've read your columns

about baked beans,

gallivanting geese who
lost their way home.

Riveting.

Too bad your ambition
outweighs your talent.

I don't need those, Sister.

I have an excellent memory.

Yeah?

We'll see about that.

(knock on door)

ARDEN: Ah. Sister Jude.

Always a pleasure to lay
one's eyes on your sunny visage.

We have a problem.

The little sapphic reporter?

Yes, I noticed

she'd been giving you fits.

I believe that

her memories are her worst enemy.

They're terrorizing her,

impeding repentance.

So you would like to help
erase some of them.

Bring her a little peace of mind.

Correct.

Is electroshock therapy
something you would suggest?

My...

that is quite a turnaround, Sister.

The last time I suggested

electroshock therapy, you accused me

of being a sadistic barbarian.

I prayed about it.

When I wasn't praying for you

to find a halfway decent haberdasher.

And I came to the understanding

that this therapy

is just another tool

in His bountiful tool chest.

LANA: Get them off! Help me!

Help me! Please let me go.

Stop! (Screams)

Get off! Get off of me!

(pants) This woman is a kidnapper.

She's a kidnapper.

She blackmailed my lover
into committing me.

Please help me!
I don't belong here!

Get me out of here!

You're right.

She is a noisy one. Help me!

(muffled yelling and whimpering)

Given your interest, Sister,
perhaps you'd like to assist.

Just hold these by her temples.

You're not squeamish, are you?

Sister.

(electrical crackling)

(electrical crackling stops)

(muffled groaning)

(music playing quietly)

Gentlemen.

I can handle it from here.
Thank you.

Mr. Walker,
Dr. Oliver Thredson.

Patient is 24 years old.

All right if I call you Kit?
Sure.

Completed grades K through 12,
no higher education.

Patient is believed responsible

for the murders of multiple women,

including his wife.

Seems unreasonable to me that a man

should be denied the right to smoke.

The murders may have started
as a purging of racial guilt

at what his conditioning

would have viewed
as an illicit coupling.

Do you know why I'm here, Kit?

You're the headshrinker

the courts sent to see if I'm crazy.

If you say I am, they
leave me here to rot,

and if you say I'm not, they put
me on trial, and then fry me.

Patient is manipulative.

Trouble is...

I'm not crazy.

And I didn't kill those ladies.
What about your wife?

Alma's not dead.
That body didn't have a head.

None of the bodies had heads, Kit.

Initially, you told
police that you were...

I know what I said!

But it wasn't Alma.

See, I know that now.

'Cause I'm starting to remember.

And I saw her.

After they took us, she was alive.

They?

The men from outer space?

They have her.

(typewriter keys clacking)

Diagnosis:
Acute clinical insanity.

(rustling)

(gasping)

Dr. Arden,
you're like a shadow.

How is my favorite
little helper today?

They had quite the ferocious
appetite last night.

Did you hear them? No.

Expected to find the
basket torn to pieces.

Please, Doctor,
you must tell me...

what are these creatures?

All in good time.

You haven't said anything
to Sister Jude, now, have you?

No, of course not.
It's our secret.

Good.

A small token of my gratitude.

Oh! (Chuckles)

A candy apple.

Looks delicious, but...

mm-mm, I can't.

Go ahead.

Have a bite.

Oh, Sister, life is too short
for regrets.

Take a taste.

No, I really shouldn't.

Sister Jude says sweets lead to sin.

I said...

take a taste.

(chuckles)

(music playing quietly,
electrical crackling)

(electrical crackling)

(distorted music playing quietly)

GRACE (distorted): Did you do what I said?
Did you toss your shit

at him?

Did you at least spit at him?
I can't do it.

I can't fake crazy.

What I need to do is

escape this place now

before he files that report

and I'm screwed.

There is no escape.

I gave you your way out.

Think.

Think hard.

There's got to be
a way out of this place.

I need to find Alma.

Now, what about the bakery?

Aren't there delivery vans?

How does that work?

You disguise yourself as a
giant loaf of pumpernickel?

Sister Jude?

I'm Dr. Oliver Thredson.

Ah, the court-
appointed psychiatrist.

You've seen our killer
of women, I trust.

So what's it going to be?

We gonna spare the taxpayers
the expense of a trial

or will I have a bed opening up?

I haven't made a determination yet.

Might we speak privately
about the conditions here?

Conditions?

What conditions might those be?

In just the short time
that I've been here,

I have witnessed appalling things.

Abuse.

(electrical crackling)

Malpractice.

Candidly, I'm shocked.

It's a madhouse, Doctor.

What did you expect?

I expected some form of treatment.

Therapy.

Sister, your hospital
still administers

electroshock therapy
to treat homosexuality.

It's barbaric.

Behavior modification
is the current standard.

Tomato, "tomahto."

You know, Dr. Thredson,
let me remind you,

your job here is
to write a recommendation

to the court regarding
the sanity of one patient.

So I suggest you do your job
and let me do mine.

Now if you'll excuse me,

there's another unfortunate
family who requires our care.

WOMAN: Jed's been a good boy.

He's always listened.

He's never talked back.

Our problem started a month ago.

Mrs. Potter, you needn't worry.

Good boys gone bad
is my area of expertise.

I've had great success in curbing

the chronic masturbator.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to interrupt.

We weren't finished

our conversation, Sister Jude.

I didn't realize you had company.

I'm Dr. Thredson,
psychiatrist here.

I'm at your service.
You need to leave, Doctor.

MRS. POTTER:
Uh, Sister Jude, please.

Our boy is troubled;
We could use a doctor's opinion.

How can I help?

Jed just turned 17.

Over the last month, he's
grown listless, moody.

Sometimes he doesn't get
up from bed for days.

And then, the next moment,
it's like someone

tied a live wire to his body.

Adolescence can be a time
of conflict and rebellion.

No, Doctor.

Jed...

...sees things.

He hears voices that aren't there.

I'm afraid he'll bring us harm.

Yesterday, we heard terrible
cries coming from the barn.

When I got there,

I found Jed covered in blood,

speaking a language
no one could understand.

(speaking in tongues)

Then I saw what he had done.

He had ripped opened the belly

of our best Guernsey.

Jed?

(growling)

Ate her heart.

It was unholy.

It was... it was
like some... thing

had stepped inside my boy's body

and taken over his soul.

Nothing?

For a man whose profession
relies on talk, talk, talk,

you appear to be at a
loss for words, Doctor.

I-I would need to see him

in order to provide
an accurate diagnosis.

We brought him here.
Let's go see the boy now.

Dr. Thredson,

you are but a guest
in our institution.

Don't wear out your
welcome the first day.

(panting)

Mother, where am I?

I'm scared.

Jed, this is a hospital.

Doctors are here to help you.

(gagging)

Jed?

(roars)

(screams)

(speaking in tongues)

Jed needs to be immediately medicated.

No, Doctor. (Hissing)

That's not what this boy needs.

LANA: This hurts my burns.

GRACE: The harder you fight,
the hotter it feels.

LANA: What are you doing
under there?

Colonel Mustard
in the library with the wrench.

I like the view from this window.

All the bare trees.

Bleak and beautiful.

Do you ever dream of escaping?

All you new people.

There is no way out.

What if I said I know a way?

You'd be full of shit.

There's a tunnel.

It's real.

I came in through it. Wow.

They really messed with your mind.

What meds are you on?

I need someone to help me

pull off an escape.

But nobody else can know.

We have to take Kit.

Absolutely not.

He's a vicious murderer.

They can make you believe anything.

There have been plenty
of killers here.

Kit's not one of them.

He can't come.

That's my line in the sand.

(sighs)

You have trouble trusting people, yes?

You would too if the person you loved

most in the world betrayed you.

Threw you away forever.

I know what that's like.

I saw you flirting with.

Our Lady of Perpetual Virginity.

You want to see my candy apple?

Get your filthy hands off me!

(gasps softly)

Come on, Doc.

Bend me over

a bread rack and pound me into shape.

You're a dirty little slut
with a poisonous tongue.

I just want to go outside

for 15 minutes in
the sun. Please.

I just want to feel
the sun on my skin.

I'll do anything.

No.

Whores get nothing.

Men like sex,

no one calls them whores.

I hate that word.

It's so ugly!

I'm into pleasure.

Ever since I was

five years old
and I slipped my fingers inside

for the very first time.

I could do it all day.

My mother made me

wear mittens to bed.

Because you're a little slut.

No. Because she
didn't understand me.

So I ran away from home,

met some jazz musicians,
real free thinkers.

I fell in love with the bass player.

Mistake.

As soon as he put a ring on
my finger, I was his property.

He could screw every Betty in town,

and I had to stay home and scrub

his dirty drawers.

So come fleet week,
he gets home and finds me

in bed with two Navy guys.

And I told him, "It's not
for self, but for country."

He decked me flat out,

threw me in the car
and locked me in the nuthouse.

And the sickest part is, they let him.

Because I like sex.

That's my crime.

Am I supposed to be moved
by that pathetic tale of woe?

Please.

I'm just asking for
five minutes in the sun.

A little fresh air.

You make me sick.

Whore.

In my estimation, the county hospital

might be better equipped
to treat your son.

They already called in the specialist.

Mr. and Mrs. Potter,
are you aware

what kind of specialist
is on his way here?

The monsignor explained
the situation to us.

SISTER JUDE: I've instructed.

Sister Mary Eunice to observe

lights out at 7:00.

Excuse me.

I will not tolerate tomfoolery

from the residents tonight.
A wise precaution, Sister.

Monsignor.

Ah, this must be...

SISTER JUDE:
The tiresome Dr. Thredson.

Dr. Thredson.

Sister Jude was just sharing
with me your concern.

It is 1964.
For God's sake, an exorcism?

You can't be serious.

The times may have changed, Doctor,

but the nature of evil has not.

You expect me to stand by
as some witch doctor

comes in here... Stand by?

On the contrary, Doctor.

What I expect is for you to assist.

I beg your pardon?

You may view us as...
backward and barbaric,

but the Church requires

a licensed physician

to be present at all exorcisms.

As a psychiatrist,

you're also a medical doctor.

You are mistaken if you think that

by making me an accomplice to this

I won't report what I've seen here.

MAN: An unbeliever.

Good.

I like having one in the room.

Ups me game.

(patients murmuring, sobbing,
music playing quietly)

(whispers):
You're asking for it.

I have to write it down
or I'll forget.

Then you better tell me now, Lana.

Before you forget, tell
me where the tunnel is.

(whispers): No.

We go together.
That's the only way.

And not a word to him.
That's my deal.

There you go.

What the hell are you doing?

FRANK:
Okay, everybody, let's go.

Sister Jude wants everyone to
get an extra good night's sleep,

so the common room is closing early.

Thank you. But give
me back my notes.

What's the matter, don't you trust me?

Let's go!

No woman should trust you.

Come on, up and at 'em!
Move your feet!

They can't find these on you.

FRANK: Let's go!
(clapping hands)

(patients sobbing, moaning, murmuring)

(door slams)

(sobbing): Please...

Please, no, stop, please!

Make it tight now.

You're hurting me.
Why are you hurting me?

Don't listen to it.
The demon is a liar.

If it speaks to you, do not
answer, just do your job.

My God, this boy's pulse
is almost nonexistent.

(screaming, growling)

Prayer book, Sister!

Your work here is done, my daughter.

Go sit with the parents.
This is no place for a woman.

I'm stronger than you think.

The Potters will be
needing some of that strength.

MONSIGNOR: Godspeed...

Sister Jude.

(Jed laughs evilly)

Yes, Father.

(speaking in tongues)

All right, gentlemen,
it's time to do God's work.

(speaking in tongues)

(door slams, evil laughter echoes)

(gentle classical music playing)

(doorbell chimes)

Stanley?

May I? Oh...

Thank you. Mm-hmm.

Are we having dinner?

You only booked me for
an hour and a half.

Actually, I find the anticipation

far more erotic than the act itself.

(laughs gently)

I find a big cock even more erotic.

If you're going to be vulgar,

I'd just as soon you not speak at all.

I'm sorry.

I can be classy, if you want.

It's just that most men
like to hear me talk dirty.

Of all the composers
from the Romantic Era...

I love Chopin the most.

Oh.

Are you familiar with this waltz?

No... "Les Adieux."

It was inspired by
his childhood sweetheart

who refused his hand in marriage.

♪ ♪

Can you hear the longing?

Oh... yes.

To us.

To... an evening of romance.

To us.

This is a Chateau St. Estephe,

one of the finest bottles
of cabernet sauvignon

you will ever taste
in your entire life.

Yes, well,
you'll have to forgive me, Stan.

I have to keep my wits about me.

I don't drink alcohol on dates,
and I don't kiss...

not on the mouth. Hey...

...what do you say
I dance for you?

Come on, Stan...

I can really shake it

if you've got something with a beat.

You... will sit down.

In your line of work,

it must have been frightening

meeting strange men...

what with a killer on the loose,

skinning and decapitating women.

A great weight must have been lifted

now that he's been captured

and you're perfectly safe.

(Father Malechi praying in Latin)

MONSIGNOR:
...we exorcise you...

...every Satanic power,

(evil laughter)

every legion...
every congregation...

Heart rate increasing,
blood pressure rising...

(old woman's voice): Oliver...

look at you.

I see what you've become.

I'm glad I gave you up.

(evil laughter)

Don't listen to it, Doctor.

Lose your place, old man?

We honor You in Jesus Christ...

Stick it up your ass, Father!

(Father Malechi praying in Latin)

Ominus immundus spiritus.

Every impure spirit, yes.

We already heard that bit.

Now skip ahead.

You're boring the hell out of me.

Ominus spiritus...

(laughing)

And the Lord said to the cripple,

take up thy bed and fly!

(yelling)

(evil laughter)

(Sister Jude praying quietly)

Our boy...

How's our boy?

He's fighting.

Very hard.

Sister Jude, will you join me?

We've taken Father Malechi
to the infirmary.

I may have to say last rites.

(growling)

Watch over him. I'll be back.

And pray, Sister.

Speak only to God.

(yelling, screaming,
electricity crackling)

I can't see!

It burns! I can't see!

Mommy, please! Somebody!

Somebody help me!

Please! I can't see!

Please! Someone help me.

Somebody help...

It drives you crazy, doesn't it?

To be the smartest person
in the room, with no willpower

because of that smelly clam
between your legs.

Oh, that's why you became
a whore, isn't it, Sister?

You're wearing red knickers right now.

Come on, Sister, put me in your mouth.

You've had 53 cocks in there already.

You were the town pump,
weren't you, Sister?

♪ A little bit later on ♪

♪ A little bit later on ♪

♪ Just wait and you'll see
how lonely you'll be ♪

♪ A little bit later on... ♪

Come on, boys.

Who wants to dance with me?

(man whistling)

(giggles)

Hello, soldier.

(moaning passionately)

Take me home.

I can't.

The baby's sleeping.

SISTER JUDE:
In the name of Jesus Christ,

strengthen me, the intercessor...

Tell me about the little girl
in blue, Judy.

The young girl, the innocent.

And you so drunk you couldn't
find your way home.

(evil laughter, electrical crackling)

♪ Give me Eastern trimmin'
where women are women ♪

♪ In high silk hose
and peek-a-boo clothes ♪

(tires screech)

♪ I'm all yours
in buttons and bows... ♪

Oh, my God.

♪ Buttons and bows ♪

♪ Frills and flowers
and buttons and bows ♪

♪ And rings and things
and buttons and bows... ♪

(gasping, crying quietly)

You never even bothered
to get out of the car.

You are a murderer, Judy.

(growling): You're a murderer!

Murderer! Murderer!

Shut up!

You shut up!

Shut up! Liar!

Hit me harder, you old whore.

(all yelling, talking at once)

Don't listen to it!

That's right, Father,
protect your whore.

It's you she thinks of when
she touches herself at night.

You're a liar!

(evil laughter) Oh, yes.

Protect your whore.
Cover yourself!

(door slams)

I was weak...

I'll purge the demon myself.
Go, be with the parents.

Go.

Little piggies...

O Lord Jesus Christ...

(electrical crackling and sizzling)

(evil laughter)

There's no more time
for prayers, Monsignor.

His heart can't handle it!

Help him! Help him now!

I'm going to sedate him!

(growling, yelling)

(rattling, creaking)

(rattling, creaking)

(distant siren wailing)

What's happening?

I don't know.

It's a power failure.

This is our chance.

(screams)

SISTER EUNICE: Sister Jude!

Sister Jude, there's trouble
in the wards.

(choking)

THREDSON:
Something's gone wrong.

He's in cardiac arrest.

LANA: I think
it's just through that door.

KIT: Grace.

Come on. Lana knows a way out.

No. He can't come with us.

Get away from us.
I read what you wrote about me.

I'm not a killer or a psychopath.

You're a liar.
Get away from us.

Stop. I'm not leaving
without him.

I'm not setting him loose
so he can kill again.

You're wrong. We'll go
find the way out ourselves.

Come on.

(distant siren wailing)

Help!

He's escaping!

The killer is escaping!

Help me!

In the hallway!

He's trying to get out!

(distant siren wailing)

(struggling, yelling)

GRACE: No! Stop it!

(gasps)

(panting)

Four, five, six,

seven.

He's dead.

(creaking)

(thud) Sister?

Almost ready.

Is that trashy makeup gone?

Clean as a virgin.

(chuckles)

What is taking you so long?

(whispering): Holy shit.

I'm just...

Oh!

I told you not to touch anything.

You don't have to pay me; I
just have to get the money...

(gasps)

You're not going anywhere, Sister.

Now, pick those up

and go lie on the bed.

(screams)

I told you

to lie on the bed.

Did you take off your panties
like I asked you?

Now...

...slowly...

...show me your mossy bank.

Slowly.

(screams)

(screaming)

(groaning)

(Sister Jude speaking quietly)

(Mrs. Potter screams)

(sobbing)

Shh, shh.

(sobbing)

No!

(gasps) Oh.

I'm so sorry, Sister.

I didn't mean to frighten you.

I was only trying to
protect your modesty.

Oh, you could never
frighten me, Doctor.

You make me feel safe.

(exhales)

I heard about your fainting spell.

I wish I could have been there.

I did ask for you,
but I know how busy you are.

Saving lives.

Yes.

Well, I'm here now

with strict instructions.

Rest and relaxation.

But what about the creatures?

Forgive me.

It's a bit disconcerting

to see you out of costume.

Oh.

I'm sorry, Doctor.

I would hate to distract you

from the important work of the day.

Don't be silly.

To me, the human body is nothing
more than a complex machine.

Like a clock,

full of... cogs and sprockets.

Now, uh, you try to get some rest.

I'll check back with the nurse

in a few hours.

(door closes)

Are you going to cane me?

If so, can we get on with it?

Now, why would I cane you?

I've learned to assume the worst.

It was a long night for all of us.

A lesson in the power of Satan.

One can never let one's guard down.

Until last night, I considered you

a corrupt little opportunist,

but God always surprises me.

I know what it took for
you to call the orderlies.

It couldn't have been easy,

but you did it anyway, and for that,

you deserve something special.

Open the door.

Go ahead.

Open the door and see your treat.

Bring them in.

These two didn't show
your courage and wisdom

and as such will be punished.

Your reward is

you will not.

You're so twisted.

Don't make me change my mind,

Miss Lana Banana.

Which of these

would you like to see on our Grace's

bare behind,

and which one on our doe-eyed

James Dean copycat?

Go ahead, pick one.

Oh, come on, Miss Winters, live large.

I'm so sorry, Grace.

Screw you, Judas bitch.

Stand up, Grace.

Stand up.

I'm the guilty one here,

Sister; she was a pawn.

She's not the one

who deserves
to be punished. I am.

She was just trying to help a friend.

He seems to think

you're just one big scoop

of melting strawberry ice cream.

(chuckles) Go stand over there.

So that was

20 lashes each.

So that makes 40 for you,

Sir Galahad.

(whacking)