American Dad! (2005–…): Season 10, Episode 14 - American Fung - full transcript
A Chinese billionaire purchases the "American Dad!" TV show and remakes it as he sees fit.
Don't turn channel!
Please.
Hello.
This is "American Dad!"
you are watching.
So, who am I?
Fung Wah, Chinese billionaire.
You don't believe me?
That's mine.
I am C.E.O.
of Fung Wah Enterprises --
big conglomerate
with many assets.
Sure, I make money.
But what make me happy?
American television -- so funny.
And who is funniest?
I give you time to guess.
Seth MacFarlane!
He shine like a diamond.
So we talk.
He admits he's bored of only
being a cartoon emperor.
So I give him
tennis-shoe business,
and he give me "American Dad!"
It's all mine!
But don't worry.
It will be same show
you always love.
Look at my money.
Okay?
So, here is your "American Dad!"
Please enjoy.
♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪
♪ I got a feelin' that
it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪
♪ the sun in the sky
has a smile on his face ♪
♪ and he's shinin' a salute
to the American race ♪
♪ oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪
♪ good -- ♪
♪ good morning, U.S.A. ♪
Keep it cool, Stan.
No one can tell
you have an erection.
'Sup, bud?
Super-soft over here.
Hello?
Smith, happy anniversary.
Huh? Sir?
It's not my anniversary.
Well, that just proves
it is your anniversary,
since you always forget
your anniversary
precisely on the day
of your anniversary.
Oh, my God!
It's my anniversary!
Francine's gonna kill me.
I have nothing prepared.
Well, perhaps you can use
the C.I.A. time machine
to go back a few days
and arrange
for the perfect anniversary.
We have a time machine?
Sadly, no.
Not after you used it for
your anniversary last year
and altered the timeline.
Now we have a margarita machine
and something called Israel.
Israel.
Please, sir,
I'm in real big trouble here.
If you have any suggestions
regarding my anniversary --
well, years ago, when I thought
I was possessed by demons,
they locked me up
in a mental hospital.
Smith, those demons took
over my every thought.
But luckily, the story
has a happy ending.
The demon moved on into a baby.
That is a happy ending.
Don't interrupt, Smith.
Point is, it's a shame
your wife is of sound mind.
Because if she were to be kept
in a mental institute
it could buy you some
much needed
anniversary-planning time.
Wait a minute.
We can just accuse Francine
of being crazy
and get her locked up
on a 72-hour psych hold.
Capital idea.
Thank you, sir.
And, by the way,
I should mention,
this is the longest I've ever
spoken on the phone before.
Not me, and I don't intend
to break my record now.
Stan?
W-w-what are you doing
over there?
Is this part of some
weird surprise thing
for our anniversary?
That's her! Go, go, go!
Beautiful.
Got to find the perfect
anniversary gift for Francine.
Oop, I'm at the top.
Diamonds should do the trick.
Whoa!
I always wanted one of those.
Whoa!
♪ We're gonna give it
a jumpstart ♪
♪ 4, 3, 2, 1, go ♪
♪ what's up? ♪
♪ When we get it going,
no way we're gonna stop ♪
♪ and all you need
is a spark, spark ♪
♪ if it's all that you got,
got, got, got, got ♪
♪ we're gonna gi-- ♪
♪ go, what's up? ♪
♪ We're gonna dance until
our l-l-legs go into shock ♪
♪ Like an adrenaline shot, shot
going straight to the heart ♪
♪ heart, heart, heart,
heart, heart ♪
♪ we're gonna give it a jump ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ I wanna rock ♪
♪ rock! ♪
♪ I want to rock ♪
Yeah, Smith here.
Good afternoon, Mr. Smith.
This is Fairfax County
Psychiatric Hospital
calling with some good news
regarding your wife.
The doctors have given her
a clean bill of health.
She's ready to be picked up.
Why are you telling me?
I'm not her dad.
I'm her kids' dad,
because we're married.
Yep.
For 19 years and 72 hours.
Ooh! Our anniversary.
Oh, shi-i-i-i-i-i-t!
Roger!
I knew this day would come.
I have too many clothes.
I got some new pants
from Lululemon
and tried to add them to the
closet, and it just burst.
Like I did,
through my Lululemon pants.
They make them too tight.
Roger, your room's
getting dangerous.
You clearly have to get rid
of some of your clothes.
I'd love to get rid
of some stuff,
but I-I wouldn't know
where to start.
What about this huge pile
of no fear T-shirts?
You could get rid of this one.
No!
People need to know
that "2nd place
is first loser."
What about this one?
No.
People need to know
that "You miss 100% of the shots
you don't take."
What about this one?
Yeah, I guess
we could scrap that.
Wait! No!
People need to remember
that "Pain is just weakness
leaving the body."
We got to find a way to help
you get rid of some stuff.
She's right, Roger.
Whoa, my God!
Listen to this.
Says here
that billionaire Fung Wah
has increased
his already vast fortune.
Mwah! Mwah!
Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!
Happy anniversary!
It was you.
You put me in here!
Okay, okay. You got me.
But it's not a problem.
No.
Because it was all
for a bigger cause --
to plan the perfect anniversary.
The perfect --
For love -- I did it for love.
Why does any man go
to great lengths?
For the love of his woman.
Love?
Three days in a loony bin?
And a bucket of chicken.
I...hate you.
Ah, that's nice --
the calm before the resolution.
Hate you! I hate you!
I hate you!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Wait a minute!
She's been discharged.
Hospital says she's free to go.
I'm Dr. Miller.
I am this hospital,
and this woman is staying here
until I say
she is ready to leave.
Wait! Francine!
Oh, my God.
I totally ruined this...
birthday?
Uh, excuse me.
I'm Stan Smith,
here to see my wife.
Ah, we meet again.
Dr. Miller.
Stan Smith.
We meet again.
Okay.
Your wife has been suffering
from an increasingly
frequent number
of semi-psychotic episodes.
Mr. Smith,
in layman's terms,
you seem to be
Francine's trigger.
Ahh.
I'm not her trigger.
Thoughts of you,
even mentions of your name
send her into a literal state
of hysteria.
It's in the best interest
of her recovery
that we keep you separated
for a while.
You have my wife, and I demand
that you release her now.
Try to understand.
It could be months
before she's well enough
to reengage with society.
I refuse to accept that.
The human mind heals itself
at its own pace.
No!
This is all my fault.
I have to come up with some way
to break you out
of the hospital.
Uh, whoopsie-doodles!
I'm a nutso!
Bl-bl-bl-bl-bl!
Yeah, yeah, we get it.
You're crazy.
If you wanted to come in here,
you could've just
admitted yourself.
You didn't have
to dry-hump our mailbox.
Yeah, you go out and get your
mail and tell me if it's dry.
These are size 2s.
You're not getting
into these again.
Come on. Be real.
I'm keeping them for motivation.
Look!
Now I cartoon character!
Is that really you,
billionaire Fung Wah?
Yes, it's really me!
I stop by just to tell you
that the TV program
"American Dad!"
is now better than ever!
Oh, yeah!
Very, very cool.
I love cartoons!
I have lots of fun learning
entire system of animation.
Then, some congratulations
are in order.
That's absolutely fantastic.
Thank you!
So, you out there,
always remember to watch
"American Dad!"
and tell all your friends.
Goodbye! So long!
Goodbye!
Bye! Take care!
Wow. Seriously?
Great, great guy.
Just one of the best.
An important man.
Francine Smith?
Where is she?
Oh, Mrs. Smith is downstairs
at "Puddin' on the hits."
It's a big talent show
for the patients.
Everyone gets dressed up
and has a ball.
Boy, he sure smelled good.
Probably wearing "Success
by Fung Wah" brand cologne.
He seemed very determined.
No surprise,
since "Success by Fung Wah"
captures the spirit
of the driven man.
The scent is an inspiring blend
of fresh lavender
and red currant brushed
with hints of coriander.
As it evolves, the mix of ginger
and fresh bamboo leaves emerges
while a masculine combination
of rich vetiver, tonka bean,
cedarwood, and musk create a
powerful presence day or night.
Oh, well. Back to work.
All right.
Who's ready
for "Puddin' on the hits"?
Remember,
if you eat your pudding,
you don't have to take
your mood stabilizers later.
'Cause they're in the pudding.
First off, miss Tina Turner!
With six career top-10 hits
and legs insured
by Lloyd's of London,
she's our very own
private dancer.
And look at her eating
her butterscotch pudding
like a good girl.
And now, daddy-os
and daddy-ettes,
"Puddin' on the hits" wants
to take you on a trip
back to the 1950s
as we welcome Bowzer!
♪ Bow-ba-ba,
ba-bow-ba-bow-bow ♪
♪ ringy-dingydingy-
dingy-doo-doo ♪
Francine!
There are orderlies everywhere
keeping things in orderly.
Need to create
some kind of distraction
so Francine can make her escape.
Bingo.
Sorry, pal, but I need
that outfit more than you.
Yeah, I don't think those
clothes are gonna fit me.
You look more my size.
Next up,
it's the Blues Brothers.
Damn. No time to change.
Come on.
It's showtime.
Roger, what about
this pink skirt?
It has sentimental value.
I lost my virginity
in that pink skirt.
What about these jeans?
I took pink skirt's virginity
in those jeans.
And hello!
Mr. Fung!
You're back!
Gather 'round
for big, big announcement.
Everybody, I have decided
to set out on a grand adventure
of my own.
That's amazing.
Congratulations again.
Just...wow.
Guess what!
You coming with me, too!
Aw, we can't right now.
We're clearing out
Roger's clothes
'cause his closet's too small.
Why don't you use this closet?
Nothing in here but umbrella!
Problem solved.
Yay!
Can I just, uh,
stop everyone for a second
and point out the elegance
of Fung Wah's solution?
So, we can go on your adventure.
What did you have in mind?
Who know what kind
of thrill and chill?
Stay tuned to find out.
All right, Jake.
Let's do this.
You're here?
Sounds like Ringo
needs some pudding.
I'd like to thank everyone
for coming out.
Hope you're all ready
to boogie tonight.
Hope one of you in particular
is ready to boogie, like, now.
This is dedicated
to the late, great magic Sam.
♪ Come on ♪
♪ oh, baby,
don't you wanna go? ♪
Psst! Francine, while
I'm distracting them,
you head for the exit.
♪ Hidehey ♪
Exit.
♪ Baby, don't you wanna go? ♪
What are you waiting for?
Make for the exit, Francine.
♪ Back to that same old place ♪
Come on, Francine.
Let's go.
♪ Oh, sweet home Chicago ♪
Exit.
Oh, my God.
What did they do to you?
Sta-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-n.
This is Stan?
You can't be here.
Going to plan "B," honey.
Stop! Stop them!
Wah!
Here's the exit.
If we can make it there,
we're home free.
You're doing great, baby.
Tranq guns! Look out!
Good job, honey.
We are some kind of team.
Well, looks like
they've decided to put us
in a private room.
Let the anniversary begin.
I'm not kissing you, you jerk.
This was supposed to be
our anniversary,
and we're spending it in a...
Is -- is this
an operating room?
Yeah, and I am
trying to operate.
Stan, I think they're gonna do
something to us.
Oh, God! No!
Wait.
What do you think?
Doctor, we shouldn't even
be in here.
Let us go!
We're thirsty, too.
We want orange juice now.
My apologies,
but a hospital can't allow
their violent patients
to run about freely.
And w-what does that mean?
A better life
through lobotomies.
Oh, God!
Was that the lobotomy?
Nope.
Just a little spot of ink
to show me where
to stick this drill.
You can't really be doing this.
Francine!
Francine, I'm so sorry!
Don't bother apologizing.
After this, neither of you will
remember what she was mad about.
Stan!
Come on, Stan.
You always think of something.
Get us out of this.
Easy, bud.
Your troubles are over.
Really?
'Cause, to me,
they seem to be starting.
Why don't you turn off
the drill,
and we'll talk
about point of view.
You see, every villain
is the hero of his own --
apple, cinnamon,
monkey, toaster.
Whoa!
No hands.
Time is ripe
for great adventure.
Wherever you lead, Mr. Fung,
we will follow.
Even if it takes us
to the very end of earth itself.
You know, I'm pretty good
at doing voices.
Check it out.
I'm the girl.
Listen.
Now I a dog, I think.
Mr. Fung,
you have Mr. Lee on line two.
No! I am very busy now!
You say I call him other time!
Quick! Down there!
Millions of dollars in jewels!
I told you!
Fung Wah always make
big, beaucoup bucks.
You! Take to my vault.
Anyhow, that's our show!
"American Dad!" --
Famous cartoon.
Keep watching
and tell your friends.
I love all my viewers.
Bye!
Oh, I forgot to mention what
happened to Stan and Francine.
So, then,
everything just work out.
Stan and Francine
leave insane asylum
and fix all their problems
at Fung Wah resort in Bali!
What a paradise!
850-acre luxury hotel.
Damaged brains
make a full recovery
in the 1.6-kilometer lazy river.
Marriage got stronger, too --
best it ever been.
Could be because Francine
and Stan hit the links
at one of five incredible golf
courses, including professional,
world-famous naga pantai
18 hole!
Uh-oh!
Then vacation ends.
But, no, because I also
own clothing line.
Stan looks so dapper
in Fung Wah signature collection
Navy pinstripe vested suit!
Also, buy my premium
Swiss-style Fung Wah chocolate,
made with real fresh butter
and the finest roasted almonds.
You not want
to miss crystal stemware!
Superior craftsmanship
bring out stunning brilliance
and the clarity of crystal.
So, did you like episode?
If you do or not do, I not
really care anymore, okay?
So why?
Because I sell show.
I flip "American Dad!"
for a profit.
Another billionaire buy it.
He is here.
Li Quan, come out.
He is shy,
but love good fart joke.
Li Quan take "American Dad!"
show from U.S.
And move it here to China.
Now, you talk.
You must say something.
Okay.
Uh, TV show now called
"American Chinese Dad!"
Uh, program is 1,000% better.
He go and improve it.
Okay, then, watch now.
You watch now.
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Please.
Hello.
This is "American Dad!"
you are watching.
So, who am I?
Fung Wah, Chinese billionaire.
You don't believe me?
That's mine.
I am C.E.O.
of Fung Wah Enterprises --
big conglomerate
with many assets.
Sure, I make money.
But what make me happy?
American television -- so funny.
And who is funniest?
I give you time to guess.
Seth MacFarlane!
He shine like a diamond.
So we talk.
He admits he's bored of only
being a cartoon emperor.
So I give him
tennis-shoe business,
and he give me "American Dad!"
It's all mine!
But don't worry.
It will be same show
you always love.
Look at my money.
Okay?
So, here is your "American Dad!"
Please enjoy.
♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪
♪ I got a feelin' that
it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪
♪ the sun in the sky
has a smile on his face ♪
♪ and he's shinin' a salute
to the American race ♪
♪ oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪
♪ good -- ♪
♪ good morning, U.S.A. ♪
Keep it cool, Stan.
No one can tell
you have an erection.
'Sup, bud?
Super-soft over here.
Hello?
Smith, happy anniversary.
Huh? Sir?
It's not my anniversary.
Well, that just proves
it is your anniversary,
since you always forget
your anniversary
precisely on the day
of your anniversary.
Oh, my God!
It's my anniversary!
Francine's gonna kill me.
I have nothing prepared.
Well, perhaps you can use
the C.I.A. time machine
to go back a few days
and arrange
for the perfect anniversary.
We have a time machine?
Sadly, no.
Not after you used it for
your anniversary last year
and altered the timeline.
Now we have a margarita machine
and something called Israel.
Israel.
Please, sir,
I'm in real big trouble here.
If you have any suggestions
regarding my anniversary --
well, years ago, when I thought
I was possessed by demons,
they locked me up
in a mental hospital.
Smith, those demons took
over my every thought.
But luckily, the story
has a happy ending.
The demon moved on into a baby.
That is a happy ending.
Don't interrupt, Smith.
Point is, it's a shame
your wife is of sound mind.
Because if she were to be kept
in a mental institute
it could buy you some
much needed
anniversary-planning time.
Wait a minute.
We can just accuse Francine
of being crazy
and get her locked up
on a 72-hour psych hold.
Capital idea.
Thank you, sir.
And, by the way,
I should mention,
this is the longest I've ever
spoken on the phone before.
Not me, and I don't intend
to break my record now.
Stan?
W-w-what are you doing
over there?
Is this part of some
weird surprise thing
for our anniversary?
That's her! Go, go, go!
Beautiful.
Got to find the perfect
anniversary gift for Francine.
Oop, I'm at the top.
Diamonds should do the trick.
Whoa!
I always wanted one of those.
Whoa!
♪ We're gonna give it
a jumpstart ♪
♪ 4, 3, 2, 1, go ♪
♪ what's up? ♪
♪ When we get it going,
no way we're gonna stop ♪
♪ and all you need
is a spark, spark ♪
♪ if it's all that you got,
got, got, got, got ♪
♪ we're gonna gi-- ♪
♪ go, what's up? ♪
♪ We're gonna dance until
our l-l-legs go into shock ♪
♪ Like an adrenaline shot, shot
going straight to the heart ♪
♪ heart, heart, heart,
heart, heart ♪
♪ we're gonna give it a jump ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ whoa, oh, eh, oh ♪
♪ I wanna rock ♪
♪ rock! ♪
♪ I want to rock ♪
Yeah, Smith here.
Good afternoon, Mr. Smith.
This is Fairfax County
Psychiatric Hospital
calling with some good news
regarding your wife.
The doctors have given her
a clean bill of health.
She's ready to be picked up.
Why are you telling me?
I'm not her dad.
I'm her kids' dad,
because we're married.
Yep.
For 19 years and 72 hours.
Ooh! Our anniversary.
Oh, shi-i-i-i-i-i-t!
Roger!
I knew this day would come.
I have too many clothes.
I got some new pants
from Lululemon
and tried to add them to the
closet, and it just burst.
Like I did,
through my Lululemon pants.
They make them too tight.
Roger, your room's
getting dangerous.
You clearly have to get rid
of some of your clothes.
I'd love to get rid
of some stuff,
but I-I wouldn't know
where to start.
What about this huge pile
of no fear T-shirts?
You could get rid of this one.
No!
People need to know
that "2nd place
is first loser."
What about this one?
No.
People need to know
that "You miss 100% of the shots
you don't take."
What about this one?
Yeah, I guess
we could scrap that.
Wait! No!
People need to remember
that "Pain is just weakness
leaving the body."
We got to find a way to help
you get rid of some stuff.
She's right, Roger.
Whoa, my God!
Listen to this.
Says here
that billionaire Fung Wah
has increased
his already vast fortune.
Mwah! Mwah!
Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!
Happy anniversary!
It was you.
You put me in here!
Okay, okay. You got me.
But it's not a problem.
No.
Because it was all
for a bigger cause --
to plan the perfect anniversary.
The perfect --
For love -- I did it for love.
Why does any man go
to great lengths?
For the love of his woman.
Love?
Three days in a loony bin?
And a bucket of chicken.
I...hate you.
Ah, that's nice --
the calm before the resolution.
Hate you! I hate you!
I hate you!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Wait a minute!
She's been discharged.
Hospital says she's free to go.
I'm Dr. Miller.
I am this hospital,
and this woman is staying here
until I say
she is ready to leave.
Wait! Francine!
Oh, my God.
I totally ruined this...
birthday?
Uh, excuse me.
I'm Stan Smith,
here to see my wife.
Ah, we meet again.
Dr. Miller.
Stan Smith.
We meet again.
Okay.
Your wife has been suffering
from an increasingly
frequent number
of semi-psychotic episodes.
Mr. Smith,
in layman's terms,
you seem to be
Francine's trigger.
Ahh.
I'm not her trigger.
Thoughts of you,
even mentions of your name
send her into a literal state
of hysteria.
It's in the best interest
of her recovery
that we keep you separated
for a while.
You have my wife, and I demand
that you release her now.
Try to understand.
It could be months
before she's well enough
to reengage with society.
I refuse to accept that.
The human mind heals itself
at its own pace.
No!
This is all my fault.
I have to come up with some way
to break you out
of the hospital.
Uh, whoopsie-doodles!
I'm a nutso!
Bl-bl-bl-bl-bl!
Yeah, yeah, we get it.
You're crazy.
If you wanted to come in here,
you could've just
admitted yourself.
You didn't have
to dry-hump our mailbox.
Yeah, you go out and get your
mail and tell me if it's dry.
These are size 2s.
You're not getting
into these again.
Come on. Be real.
I'm keeping them for motivation.
Look!
Now I cartoon character!
Is that really you,
billionaire Fung Wah?
Yes, it's really me!
I stop by just to tell you
that the TV program
"American Dad!"
is now better than ever!
Oh, yeah!
Very, very cool.
I love cartoons!
I have lots of fun learning
entire system of animation.
Then, some congratulations
are in order.
That's absolutely fantastic.
Thank you!
So, you out there,
always remember to watch
"American Dad!"
and tell all your friends.
Goodbye! So long!
Goodbye!
Bye! Take care!
Wow. Seriously?
Great, great guy.
Just one of the best.
An important man.
Francine Smith?
Where is she?
Oh, Mrs. Smith is downstairs
at "Puddin' on the hits."
It's a big talent show
for the patients.
Everyone gets dressed up
and has a ball.
Boy, he sure smelled good.
Probably wearing "Success
by Fung Wah" brand cologne.
He seemed very determined.
No surprise,
since "Success by Fung Wah"
captures the spirit
of the driven man.
The scent is an inspiring blend
of fresh lavender
and red currant brushed
with hints of coriander.
As it evolves, the mix of ginger
and fresh bamboo leaves emerges
while a masculine combination
of rich vetiver, tonka bean,
cedarwood, and musk create a
powerful presence day or night.
Oh, well. Back to work.
All right.
Who's ready
for "Puddin' on the hits"?
Remember,
if you eat your pudding,
you don't have to take
your mood stabilizers later.
'Cause they're in the pudding.
First off, miss Tina Turner!
With six career top-10 hits
and legs insured
by Lloyd's of London,
she's our very own
private dancer.
And look at her eating
her butterscotch pudding
like a good girl.
And now, daddy-os
and daddy-ettes,
"Puddin' on the hits" wants
to take you on a trip
back to the 1950s
as we welcome Bowzer!
♪ Bow-ba-ba,
ba-bow-ba-bow-bow ♪
♪ ringy-dingydingy-
dingy-doo-doo ♪
Francine!
There are orderlies everywhere
keeping things in orderly.
Need to create
some kind of distraction
so Francine can make her escape.
Bingo.
Sorry, pal, but I need
that outfit more than you.
Yeah, I don't think those
clothes are gonna fit me.
You look more my size.
Next up,
it's the Blues Brothers.
Damn. No time to change.
Come on.
It's showtime.
Roger, what about
this pink skirt?
It has sentimental value.
I lost my virginity
in that pink skirt.
What about these jeans?
I took pink skirt's virginity
in those jeans.
And hello!
Mr. Fung!
You're back!
Gather 'round
for big, big announcement.
Everybody, I have decided
to set out on a grand adventure
of my own.
That's amazing.
Congratulations again.
Just...wow.
Guess what!
You coming with me, too!
Aw, we can't right now.
We're clearing out
Roger's clothes
'cause his closet's too small.
Why don't you use this closet?
Nothing in here but umbrella!
Problem solved.
Yay!
Can I just, uh,
stop everyone for a second
and point out the elegance
of Fung Wah's solution?
So, we can go on your adventure.
What did you have in mind?
Who know what kind
of thrill and chill?
Stay tuned to find out.
All right, Jake.
Let's do this.
You're here?
Sounds like Ringo
needs some pudding.
I'd like to thank everyone
for coming out.
Hope you're all ready
to boogie tonight.
Hope one of you in particular
is ready to boogie, like, now.
This is dedicated
to the late, great magic Sam.
♪ Come on ♪
♪ oh, baby,
don't you wanna go? ♪
Psst! Francine, while
I'm distracting them,
you head for the exit.
♪ Hidehey ♪
Exit.
♪ Baby, don't you wanna go? ♪
What are you waiting for?
Make for the exit, Francine.
♪ Back to that same old place ♪
Come on, Francine.
Let's go.
♪ Oh, sweet home Chicago ♪
Exit.
Oh, my God.
What did they do to you?
Sta-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-n.
This is Stan?
You can't be here.
Going to plan "B," honey.
Stop! Stop them!
Wah!
Here's the exit.
If we can make it there,
we're home free.
You're doing great, baby.
Tranq guns! Look out!
Good job, honey.
We are some kind of team.
Well, looks like
they've decided to put us
in a private room.
Let the anniversary begin.
I'm not kissing you, you jerk.
This was supposed to be
our anniversary,
and we're spending it in a...
Is -- is this
an operating room?
Yeah, and I am
trying to operate.
Stan, I think they're gonna do
something to us.
Oh, God! No!
Wait.
What do you think?
Doctor, we shouldn't even
be in here.
Let us go!
We're thirsty, too.
We want orange juice now.
My apologies,
but a hospital can't allow
their violent patients
to run about freely.
And w-what does that mean?
A better life
through lobotomies.
Oh, God!
Was that the lobotomy?
Nope.
Just a little spot of ink
to show me where
to stick this drill.
You can't really be doing this.
Francine!
Francine, I'm so sorry!
Don't bother apologizing.
After this, neither of you will
remember what she was mad about.
Stan!
Come on, Stan.
You always think of something.
Get us out of this.
Easy, bud.
Your troubles are over.
Really?
'Cause, to me,
they seem to be starting.
Why don't you turn off
the drill,
and we'll talk
about point of view.
You see, every villain
is the hero of his own --
apple, cinnamon,
monkey, toaster.
Whoa!
No hands.
Time is ripe
for great adventure.
Wherever you lead, Mr. Fung,
we will follow.
Even if it takes us
to the very end of earth itself.
You know, I'm pretty good
at doing voices.
Check it out.
I'm the girl.
Listen.
Now I a dog, I think.
Mr. Fung,
you have Mr. Lee on line two.
No! I am very busy now!
You say I call him other time!
Quick! Down there!
Millions of dollars in jewels!
I told you!
Fung Wah always make
big, beaucoup bucks.
You! Take to my vault.
Anyhow, that's our show!
"American Dad!" --
Famous cartoon.
Keep watching
and tell your friends.
I love all my viewers.
Bye!
Oh, I forgot to mention what
happened to Stan and Francine.
So, then,
everything just work out.
Stan and Francine
leave insane asylum
and fix all their problems
at Fung Wah resort in Bali!
What a paradise!
850-acre luxury hotel.
Damaged brains
make a full recovery
in the 1.6-kilometer lazy river.
Marriage got stronger, too --
best it ever been.
Could be because Francine
and Stan hit the links
at one of five incredible golf
courses, including professional,
world-famous naga pantai
18 hole!
Uh-oh!
Then vacation ends.
But, no, because I also
own clothing line.
Stan looks so dapper
in Fung Wah signature collection
Navy pinstripe vested suit!
Also, buy my premium
Swiss-style Fung Wah chocolate,
made with real fresh butter
and the finest roasted almonds.
You not want
to miss crystal stemware!
Superior craftsmanship
bring out stunning brilliance
and the clarity of crystal.
So, did you like episode?
If you do or not do, I not
really care anymore, okay?
So why?
Because I sell show.
I flip "American Dad!"
for a profit.
Another billionaire buy it.
He is here.
Li Quan, come out.
He is shy,
but love good fart joke.
Li Quan take "American Dad!"
show from U.S.
And move it here to China.
Now, you talk.
You must say something.
Okay.
Uh, TV show now called
"American Chinese Dad!"
Uh, program is 1,000% better.
He go and improve it.
Okay, then, watch now.
You watch now.
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