Alone (2015–…): Season 2, Episode 1 - Once More Unto the Breach - full transcript
The first day of the adventure begins, with 10 people prepared to head out into unknown wilderness and survive for as long as they can, in total isolation. But when the survivalists confront rocky terrain, wet environments, and hungry predators, all of them begin to question their resolve.
[dramatic music]
*
- This is gonna be
one of the most epic
experiences of my life.
- You're by yourself.
Anything could happen
at any point in time.
- All of your success
and all of your failure
is all on you.
- This is it.
It has begun.
- Who are you when everything's
been stripped away?
[bleep].
- [yelping]
- It's scary out here
in these woods.
- I have not had
a serious meal in a week.
- If I can't get a fire,
then I can't stay here.
- It's always in the back
of your mind,
"Well, I could tap out."
- Putting up
with this filming [bleep]?
- Running into a predator,
it's not an if.
It's a when.
Get the hell out of here.
I see you.
Get out of here!
- I need to get
out of the woods.
- I'm just demolished.
- I'm living
a hand-to-mouth existence.
Yes!
Ah!
- $500,000
is a lot of money.
- It's just gonna keep
getting harder.
- It's not the world
that needs to change.
It's me
that needs to change.
- [moans]
*
- We're about to embark
on an extended wilderness
survival experience.
How long,
I don't know.
- What we're doing out here
is dangerous.
The wilderness
is the unexpected.
We have an idea
of the conditions.
We have an idea
of the resources.
But until you get
on the ground,
you have no idea
what you're going to do.
- Oh, my God,
I'm alone.
[laughs]
- Last person left
wins $500,000.
That can make you
push yourself past the limit.
- Holy crap.
What the hell
have I done?
*
- We get to take
only ten survival items,
which is hard enough
as it is,
but documenting everything
is an entirely different level
of craziness.
*
- There they go.
*
Alone at last.
- That's past the boot line.
[bleep].
Go, go, go, go.
Damn it!
Now I'm soaking wet.
I'm in for it.
- It's beautiful,
but with beauty
also comes the danger.
The predators--
the bears, the cougars,
or the wolves--
they are part of the circle,
and I just need
to learn to find my order.
- What's gonna be
more difficult,
being alone
or staying alive?
[pensive music]
*
- All right,
just got dropped off.
Uh...
the bush is just crazy,
crazy thick over here.
Uh, got a good
water source already.
Won't have to worry
about water at all.
Uh, right now,
I'm just looking
for a area
to set up my shelter.
*
Water, shelter, and food--
those are the orders
that I'm gonna go in,
and then fire,
of course.
Mike Tyson said,
"Everybody has a plan until
they get hit in the face."
As long as I come out here
with a open mind,
taking everything
day by day,
I know I can develop my plan
as I go along.
$500,000
is a lot of money.
Motivates you to do
a lot of things out here.
Wow.
Area's really thick.
The woods are really wet,
not what I expected it
to be.
Look, look, look.
*
[exhales]
That's bear scat.
Definitely
a bear presence here.
*
I'm not gonna sugarcoat it.
I'm a little concerned
right now.
Feeling a little anxious
right now.
The woods have
a eerie feeling with them.
I swear they do.
Feels eerie out here,
but, uh, I'm gonna keep
pushing forward,
see if I can find a place
to make this shelter.
*
In the military, you have
to push through everything,
so that's what I plan
on doing while I'm out here.
Hello, everybody.
How's everybody doing?
all: Hey!
- I did seven years, ten months
in the army.
Enjoyed every moment
of it.
It's a great experience.
Love to serve my country.
This is the rest
of my family right here.
That's my mom
right here.
- Hey.
- Hi.
I'm doing this because
it's just another opportunity
for me to be
a positive role model
to my family, friends,
and people that look up to me.
Put it in the bag.
Put it in here.
Oh!
Being alone
won't bother me one bit.
I look forward to it.
60 days.
I think it'll be easy to do.
Being in the military
helps me out here
by giving you
the intestinal fortitude
to push through
any adversity
that you might have
or you might encounter.
The military has just
given me drive.
There's no stop.
You know, I ain't gonna tap out,
that's for sure.
Bear gonna have
to grab me, you know?
- You got to do some
physical altercation.
- Yeah, and then
if the bear grab me,
if somebody see the bear fight,
they need to help the bear.
- Right.
[laughter]
- I'm just saying.
I'm gonna be fine
out there.
*
This area's dense.
Really dense.
Oh, [bleep].
This is fresh.
This is fresh bear scat
right here.
I mean,
this is probably
20 to 30 minutes old.
I'm not sure,
maybe a hour.
Um, I got
to get out of here.
All right, let me, uh,
get moving.
[ambient music]
*
- That's a super steep
slope right there.
So, I mean,
I can't really
pitch a tarp
right there or anything.
I need to--
I don't really want
to dive into the woods
right there.
So...
let's get off
this beach.
Let's go exploring.
*
My priorities for tonight
are--are purely shelter.
I-I just want to make sure
I got a shelter,
and it doesn't have to be
an elaborate shelter.
There's no flat spots.
It's all deadfall.
It's all, you know,
super brushy.
It's gonna be hard to find
a good shelter location.
And directly
in front of me
is a--
is a creek bed.
If it starts
to rain,
that creek is gonna rise,
and it's gonna flood me out.
So what I'm gonna do
is rethink my situation.
And, you know,
if I have to climb this hill
to find a good night's sleep
tonight, I will.
But...
I barely scratched the surface
of where I'm at,
barely.
Okay.
I've reassessed
my plan,
and that's okay.
I'm gonna just do
something super simple.
You can see these
cedar trees behind me?
I'm just gonna take my tarp
and drape it over it.
That's all I'm gonna do.
The heck with it.
That's my shelter
for tonight.
*
You never know, when you
come out into the woods--
it could be an hour,
two days, three months
before you are
sick and tired of things
or something scares you
or, you know,
you miss your family too much
or whatever.
Your mind
gets ahold of you.
Hunger gets ahold of you,
whatever.
So you never know
what's gonna happen,
but I'm not sure
what could want me
to come out
of this place.
*
All right, after looking
at where I put my shelter,
I--this is my first
moron moment.
I was a moron
for putting it there.
The water's
right next to it,
but we're talking
by not very much.
That's a stupid place
to put a shelter.
My first moron moment.
That's all right.
It'll happen.
I can change it.
[water rushing]
I need to find
a shelter location.
The shelter location
I have sucks.
I could sleep there tonight
if I absolutely have to.
I would really rather
not sleep there.
I'm gonna follow
this creek up
and see what happens
after that.
[tense music]
*
Honestly, I still
can't believe
that I'm actually
out here doing this.
Before I came out here,
I shaved my beard.
It was kind of a
"I'm gonna start changing
the way that I live
my life now."
[soft music]
I've been married
a long time.
My two kids,
they're already grown up.
They already left.
This is my son.
This was
a graduation picture.
This is my daughter.
This is, uh,
my wife, Rachel.
So we've been
married for--
How long has it--
[both chuckling]
How long
has it been now?
27 years,
something like that?
- 26.
- I think what I want to put
in there next is my ax.
I just focused
my entire adult life--
after 18, basically--
in raising my kids.
Obviously, I love my wife
and I love
my family dearly,
but there comes a time
sometimes in a person's life
where they need to step back
away from their life
and have an experience,
have a journey,
a spiritual journey,
kind of.
I don't know how else
to explain it.
Like, really excited.
- I know you are.
And when you're out there,
remember us,
and remember
that we support you
and we love you
and we're really happy for you.
I love you.
- Love you too.
I want to step back away
from the life that I'm living
right now,
get a little more
introspective,
and find out
what's my next step in life.
- You're welcome.
There was never any question.
[ambient music]
- That is where
I came from.
Right down there.
I'm gonna keep up
this steep son of a gun
'cause I see this one overhang
is pretty small,
but there's
another huge one up there.
It looks like
it flattens out.
God, I hope it gets easier.
[laughs]
Oh, I need a shelter.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
Back up the mountain,
one step at a time.
[rain pattering]
*
It's crazy
walking here.
You can be walking along,
and then all of a sudden,
you can step in a hole, and you
can be up to your armpits,
or you can be down
to your ankle.
You never know.
It's not solid ground.
*
Oh, [bleep],
this next bit's gonna be fun.
*
It's just so thick.
Holy crap.
All right, onward.
*
[grunts]
[grunting]
Yeah, this is
pretty freaking steep.
*
I used to have [indistinct].
*
[bleep].
[grunts]
Damn it.
Fricking jacket's getting wet.
*
Damn it!
Stick in the eye,
stick in the eye.
*
Red alert, stick in the--
God.
[bleep].
Piece-of-[bleep] [bleep].
Get the [bleep]
out of my way, you [bleep].
[bleep] you.
Get the [bleep]
out of my way.
[bleep].
Damn it!
[bleep] hate this place.
*
[dramatic music]
*
- I've seen a lot of sign
of bear around here.
What I want to do is make sure
I have my food out of reach
and away from--
um, away from me as well.
That way, I don't
attract anything into my area.
[tense music]
*
In Iraq or in Afghanistan,
any of those places
that I've been before,
at least I know what--
what conditions
I'm gonna be in
and, you know,
what to expect,
and, you know,
at the end of the day,
I know I have, um,
other people there
that have my back.
If something happens
to me here,
the only person
you have is yourself.
Aw, man.
The fear factor
of the unknown,
it's just overwhelming.
[line snaps]
[bleep].
I won't be able to get it up
without the line breaking off.
Either have
to find some rope,
or I have to think of
a different option for tonight.
Let's go see if I can find
a different location.
[dramatic music]
*
- I can't believe
this weather.
It's amazing.
But after jumping off
the plane today
and getting
soaking wet,
my boots are wet,
and so I got to move fast.
I was hoping that maybe
I wouldn't need a fire tonight,
um, 'cause it's
warm enough,
but now that all my gear's wet,
I'm pretty much screwed.
Um...
so that--that was
all the unknowns
I was worried about.
[laughs]
It's what
makes me nervous.
It's thick.
It's dense.
It's green today,
but it's gonna be
dark tomorrow.
This is it.
This is it.
It's what I got.
It's here.
Let's do it.
*
Go look around here,
see what I got
for shelter space.
There's so much going through
my mind, it's--it's unreal.
I'm scared.
I'm nervous.
I'm excited!
Just the thought
of being alone
and--and the unknown,
it's--it's not gonna be easy.
I'm gonna set up over here,
I think, for the night.
So I'm gonna clean out
this area over here,
um, this way.
*
The hardest challenge
is going to be
leaving my children.
I miss my daughters
terribly.
They're always
on my mind.
Here--
- [giggling]
- Good girl.
My daughter's
all over the place.
She's four now.
- Hey, don't stop swinging.
- She does know
I'm gone.
She does know
that I love her.
Greta, she's just a baby,
uh, so I don't get
to talk to her much,
but I get to hear her.
She's rolling around.
She's doing good.
I was part
of the Hobart Hotshots
out of the
Tahoe National Forest.
Hotshots are
wildland firefighters.
They are known to be
the biggest, the best,
the strongest in the field.
And it was one of the hardest
challenges I've ever done.
What I learned
was that
mental strength can
get you just about anywhere.
I'm doing this
because I want to see
how far I can
actually make it.
How far mentally and physically
can I survive on my own?
I want my kids to say,
"My mom did that,"
or, "Why would
something stop me?
I can do that."
Are you gonna miss me?
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna go
high to low with this guy.
[sniffles]
I feel that if I pass
this adventure up,
I would be shorting myself
and my children,
because there should be
no limits in life.
There shouldn't--you should
push yourself
to your personal extremes
and see how far
you can always go
to better yourself
and those around you.
Uh, anyway,
it looks like [bleep].
It's kicking my ass.
I wasn't--
It's good.
It is what it is.
It's a large tarp.
I'm going to go ahead
and brace down
the other side of my tarp
so that it's usable
for tonight.
[tense music]
*
- Pretty much right now
just feeling, uh--
feeling the place out.
I haven't been
out here very long.
Couple hours.
Everywhere I go,
I'm starting to see
more and more
signs of bears.
Um, just, uh,
looking for a area
to set up my shelter.
Just want to stay focused,
don't want to start
getting upset right now.
Got a lot of things
to accomplish and do.
Anytime you get frustrated
out here in this environment,
it can, uh,
mess with you.
*
[animal calling]
I just heard a noise,
a loud noise, out there.
I'm not sure
where it was.
Um, it was kind of
a little far off, uh,
but definitely
heard something.
[whistles]
Hey, bear.
Yo, bear.
*
This is real now.
This is real.
*
[animal calling]
This is bad.
I got to get
out of here.
*
This is crazy.
*
*
- I got to get hustling.
I got much to do.
Well, I'm gonna get in here
and try to get things situated.
That way, I can make
the first night easy
and not stress myself out
too much.
[ambient music]
*
So I'm going to, uh,
get my shelter up
for tonight.
*
You never know what's
over your head unless you look.
And I'm gonna
show you why
it's so important
to look.
[wood cracks]
[exhales]
That could have
come down on me
while I was sleeping
with the right
kind of, uh,
wind coming
through here.
So...
always check above.
Look for, uh,
widowmakers,
deadfall.
'Cause you never know
what you got above your head.
*
There are certain skills,
you know, basic techniques
that if you
don't follow
and you suffer
a mechanical injury,
there's nobody here
to help you.
You have to know
how to help yourself
because rescue
is a ways away.
This is the type
of environment
that you need to know how
to effect self-rescue first.
If you don't, then it could
be pretty harsh for you,
and it could definitely
take you out.
That's difficult.
So I'm looking forward
to using that knowledge
that I have gained
over the years
in helping me
in this experience.
*
[gunshot]
I am former military
and former law enforcement.
[laughter]
I am very fortunate.
I still have my parents.
- All right,
good boy.
- I have my daughter
and my son,
three grandchildren,
and my best friend, Molly.
[dog growls]
[growls]
With the children
having grown and left,
living their lives,
Molly's always been there.
Molly, here.
I think she's upset
with me right now
because I am leaving.
For me, this is
a spiritual journey.
I'm looking forward
to having this time
to go within myself
to resolve a lot
of unanswered feelings
and emotions
and events
in my law enforcement
and military career.
- Be safe,
always.
Remember I love you.
- I love you too.
Been witness to a lot
of very difficult things.
I'm here
for the inner journey
and spiritual aspects
of healing myself.
*
I can't forget it,
but at least I can
make peace with it
and try to step forward
with a new perspective
and a new beginning.
All right.
One throw-together
temporary shelter.
This will get me
through tonight.
[dramatic music]
*
- Okay, well,
I'm gonna be brutally honest.
I am at a loss as to
what to do for a shelter.
I mean,
I want to do
a plow point of some sort,
but...
I thought
I'd have, like,
a little bit
of level ground.
And, I mean, I do have
a little tiny bit,
but it's right next
to this creek.
I've been up
along this ridgeline.
Tomorrow I'm gonna explore
around that ridgeline.
What I need
to do today
is quit
screwing around.
I need to start
cutting some logs.
*
So my preferred shelter
is a plow point shelter.
*
Basically what I do is,
I take a square tarp.
You take one corner
and you incline it
on a tree branch.
And I can drape my tarp
over the top of that.
Pretty tough to work
with a tarp
when you don't have
much real estate to work with.
*
And just manufacture
stakes.
And then I can stretch my tarp
tight enough
so I don't have
to worry about cordage.
That will at least work
for this first night.
*
Man, it's beautiful here.
Holy crap.
Wow.
*
- Um...
I'm being honest with you,
I'm feeling a little worried.
I feel like I bit off
more than I can chew,
uh, being out here
right now.
Um, a little frustrating.
[brooding music]
*
Didn't think I'd have a problem
worrying about animals,
but the minute
I seen that bear scat
when I got
off the boat,
um, really changed me.
It changed my whole psyche
about the--the situation.
*
The woods, they have
a eerie feeling about them.
The forest
is so dense.
Every little sound
that I hear is bothering me.
It's getting to me.
*
It's a different animal
being out here
and knowing you have
to do this all by yourself.
I know everything
to do.
I know--I know
what I want to do,
but going inside
them woods is, uh...
*
Just--I just don't know.
*
I got a military
background.
I'm thinking I'll be able
to go off in here
and turn on that switch
and, you know, just focus
on what I need to do
in order to survive.
But, uh,
as of right now...
*
As of right now,
I'm not, uh--
I'm not feeling it.
I'm not feeling it
at all.
[dramatic music]
*
- That's just incredible.
[sniffles]
Check this out.
The whole place
is a mussel bed.
Look at that.
Everything right here.
Mussels...
are my absolute
favorite.
This would be
enough food
that I could collect
every day...
[sniffles]
and not run out
for six months,
and I can't touch it.
*
When we came out here,
they told us that we
could not partake
in any of the shellfish
out here
because of red tide.
*
Ugh.
This is tough.
This is
a hard part.
It's so hard looking
at something so awesome
knowing that it
could kill you.
This is one
of those little things
that rocks your world.
[sniffles]
Ugh.
*
- Right now, this is feeling
like the toughest thing
I've ever done
in my life.
It's like I had
all these ideas in my head
about what
I wanted to do,
but everything just went
out the window.
It's like I don't
know anything right now.
It's like I'm--
I've never been
out here
in the woods.
My entire morale
just went
down the drain.
*
This was
a personal choice
to come and do something
to make a better living
for myself
and my family.
I don't know
that it was right decision.
At this point
right now,
all I want to do
is go back home.
*
[somber ambient music]
*
- I mean,
it was just--
I-I just never experienced
nothing like that before.
*
I'm good.
So I guess
I'm officially tapping.
*
I'm good.
*
Got a lot of people
looking up to me
to do good things.
I'm feeling like
I've let them down.
*
It's a different animal
being out here
and knowing you have
to do this all by yourself.
*
I mean, 'cause
when they say "alone,"
you're really alone.
[ominous music]
*
[rain pattering]
[branches rustling]
*
- I believe
I hear...
*
The neighborhood
residents.
I just have not
seen any.
But my thought
is that
they will come
to visit tonight.
*
[rain pattering]
*
[branches snapping]
There was a crashing
through the brush.
*
It is just amazing
the amount of noise
that I'm hearing
in the woods here.
*
I mean, I figured
I'd hear a bit,
but this is
quite a bit.
*
[branches rustling]
Like that.
[branches rustling]
*
[branches snapping]
*
[dramatic music]
*
[rain pattering]
- It's raining.
It's gonna
be raining
cats and dogs
probably all day.
My shelter's
holding up okay, though.
That's all
that matters.
[sighs]
And my boots
are still wet,
which pisses me off.
I can't stop
thinking about that.
I don't have
dry boots.
[sighs]
All right, I'm gonna try
and go back to bed.
*
[rain pattering]
- [laughs]
*
Well, let's see here.
*
See if we see
an eye shine back,
'cause I heard...
*
I am mostly concerned
with the cougars.
I will do my very best
to stay out of their way
and let them do
what they need to do
to get through
their winter,
and I'm hoping
they'll do the same for me.
But when you weigh
275 pounds,
you learn that running
isn't much of an option,
so you better
be ready to fight.
Hopefully, they will
find me not interesting.
*
Little thump-thumps
in the night.
*
[dramatic music]
*
- [sighs]
*
[sighs]
It rained all night.
No big surprise.
[sighs]
I'm still just pissed off
about my boots.
I can't--
It's gonna be days
before my boots dry out.
Days.
*
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Stop right there.
I'm finding all kinds
of [bleep] water
in my tent.
The bottom of my bag
is soaking wet.
*
My sleeping bag
is down,
and once down gets wet,
it's near impossible
to get dry
in these conditions,
and I need
a dry sleeping bag.
*
[ominous music]
*
All of my kindling,
everything I collected,
wet.
Soaking wet.
What the hell?
[exhales]
I screwed up.
Day one.
All my [bleep]'s wet.
[sighs]
First things first.
Ridgepole check.
So I plan on
building, uh,
the same sort of structure,
an A-frame.
The construction
that will be different
is the fact
that I'm going to tie
my grommets together
underneath,
and then I'm going
to put the grommets
under my ridgepole.
Uh, point being
that the rain
can't get in
on the sides at all.
The rain will come in
from underneath.
And then from there,
I have an extra tarp
as one of my items,
and I'm going to lay that
on the floor
and create a boat
so that if any water sheds
from the inside of the tarp,
it misses me
in the center of the boat.
I put that green tarp
on top
so if any water comes in
on my ground tarp,
my bottom tarp
should stay dry.
Hopefully.
See, it's all up
on the sides there.
*
If I can stay dry,
I can stay out here
as long as I want to.
*
*
- Where to look for firewood
in a rain forest...
When it's dry out,
no less?
Winter's gonna be
a bitch.
*
[snipping]
[exhales]
All of that just
for one little handful
of firewood
that's wet anyway.
[ambient music]
*
Let's hope I can
get this fire going.
[flint striking]
*
Wow, winter's gonna be
a pain in the butt, man.
*
I'm just...
*
This creek by me,
I know it's gonna swell
as soon
as the rains start.
And trying to make
a move in the rain
is just gonna be
just a pain.
So I don't know.
[sniffles]
*
The alone part
doesn't bother me
at all,
but it's only
been two days.
But just the--
the crappy-ass shelter
that I made
and the freaking difficulty
I'm having with fire
and just the steep terrain
is kicking my butt.
I mean, if--if I--
if the terrain
was just even just
a little bit easier...
These have got to be
just about the hardest woods
I've ever had
to try to survive in.
I just feel like
I'm not, uh,
performing
like I should be.
*
[insects chirping]
*
[bears grunting]
*
There's a bear outside.
[bear growls]
Hey, don't come over here.
[bear grunting]
Sounds like
a damn bear to me.
I don't know
what else it could be.
[harsh voice]
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
[dramatic music]
- It is not easy going
up here.
Oh, ah.
- I woke up, and the whole side
of my shelter was glowing.
I almost caught
the entire forest on fire.
- It's basically fighting
an inner battle all day long.
I can't do no more!
- I way underestimated
this place.
[air horn blares]
- You heard me, get!
[air horn blares]
- One wrong move
and I'm done.
- Ooh!
- What am I doing
out here?
- Look at that.
Squished mouse,
my favorite.
- Oh!
- God, I just feel like
I'm letting her down.
- I'm slowly
dying of starvation.
- Oh, my God.
Mama bear just stood up
on her hind legs.
Not good.
*
*
- This is gonna be
one of the most epic
experiences of my life.
- You're by yourself.
Anything could happen
at any point in time.
- All of your success
and all of your failure
is all on you.
- This is it.
It has begun.
- Who are you when everything's
been stripped away?
[bleep].
- [yelping]
- It's scary out here
in these woods.
- I have not had
a serious meal in a week.
- If I can't get a fire,
then I can't stay here.
- It's always in the back
of your mind,
"Well, I could tap out."
- Putting up
with this filming [bleep]?
- Running into a predator,
it's not an if.
It's a when.
Get the hell out of here.
I see you.
Get out of here!
- I need to get
out of the woods.
- I'm just demolished.
- I'm living
a hand-to-mouth existence.
Yes!
Ah!
- $500,000
is a lot of money.
- It's just gonna keep
getting harder.
- It's not the world
that needs to change.
It's me
that needs to change.
- [moans]
*
- We're about to embark
on an extended wilderness
survival experience.
How long,
I don't know.
- What we're doing out here
is dangerous.
The wilderness
is the unexpected.
We have an idea
of the conditions.
We have an idea
of the resources.
But until you get
on the ground,
you have no idea
what you're going to do.
- Oh, my God,
I'm alone.
[laughs]
- Last person left
wins $500,000.
That can make you
push yourself past the limit.
- Holy crap.
What the hell
have I done?
*
- We get to take
only ten survival items,
which is hard enough
as it is,
but documenting everything
is an entirely different level
of craziness.
*
- There they go.
*
Alone at last.
- That's past the boot line.
[bleep].
Go, go, go, go.
Damn it!
Now I'm soaking wet.
I'm in for it.
- It's beautiful,
but with beauty
also comes the danger.
The predators--
the bears, the cougars,
or the wolves--
they are part of the circle,
and I just need
to learn to find my order.
- What's gonna be
more difficult,
being alone
or staying alive?
[pensive music]
*
- All right,
just got dropped off.
Uh...
the bush is just crazy,
crazy thick over here.
Uh, got a good
water source already.
Won't have to worry
about water at all.
Uh, right now,
I'm just looking
for a area
to set up my shelter.
*
Water, shelter, and food--
those are the orders
that I'm gonna go in,
and then fire,
of course.
Mike Tyson said,
"Everybody has a plan until
they get hit in the face."
As long as I come out here
with a open mind,
taking everything
day by day,
I know I can develop my plan
as I go along.
$500,000
is a lot of money.
Motivates you to do
a lot of things out here.
Wow.
Area's really thick.
The woods are really wet,
not what I expected it
to be.
Look, look, look.
*
[exhales]
That's bear scat.
Definitely
a bear presence here.
*
I'm not gonna sugarcoat it.
I'm a little concerned
right now.
Feeling a little anxious
right now.
The woods have
a eerie feeling with them.
I swear they do.
Feels eerie out here,
but, uh, I'm gonna keep
pushing forward,
see if I can find a place
to make this shelter.
*
In the military, you have
to push through everything,
so that's what I plan
on doing while I'm out here.
Hello, everybody.
How's everybody doing?
all: Hey!
- I did seven years, ten months
in the army.
Enjoyed every moment
of it.
It's a great experience.
Love to serve my country.
This is the rest
of my family right here.
That's my mom
right here.
- Hey.
- Hi.
I'm doing this because
it's just another opportunity
for me to be
a positive role model
to my family, friends,
and people that look up to me.
Put it in the bag.
Put it in here.
Oh!
Being alone
won't bother me one bit.
I look forward to it.
60 days.
I think it'll be easy to do.
Being in the military
helps me out here
by giving you
the intestinal fortitude
to push through
any adversity
that you might have
or you might encounter.
The military has just
given me drive.
There's no stop.
You know, I ain't gonna tap out,
that's for sure.
Bear gonna have
to grab me, you know?
- You got to do some
physical altercation.
- Yeah, and then
if the bear grab me,
if somebody see the bear fight,
they need to help the bear.
- Right.
[laughter]
- I'm just saying.
I'm gonna be fine
out there.
*
This area's dense.
Really dense.
Oh, [bleep].
This is fresh.
This is fresh bear scat
right here.
I mean,
this is probably
20 to 30 minutes old.
I'm not sure,
maybe a hour.
Um, I got
to get out of here.
All right, let me, uh,
get moving.
[ambient music]
*
- That's a super steep
slope right there.
So, I mean,
I can't really
pitch a tarp
right there or anything.
I need to--
I don't really want
to dive into the woods
right there.
So...
let's get off
this beach.
Let's go exploring.
*
My priorities for tonight
are--are purely shelter.
I-I just want to make sure
I got a shelter,
and it doesn't have to be
an elaborate shelter.
There's no flat spots.
It's all deadfall.
It's all, you know,
super brushy.
It's gonna be hard to find
a good shelter location.
And directly
in front of me
is a--
is a creek bed.
If it starts
to rain,
that creek is gonna rise,
and it's gonna flood me out.
So what I'm gonna do
is rethink my situation.
And, you know,
if I have to climb this hill
to find a good night's sleep
tonight, I will.
But...
I barely scratched the surface
of where I'm at,
barely.
Okay.
I've reassessed
my plan,
and that's okay.
I'm gonna just do
something super simple.
You can see these
cedar trees behind me?
I'm just gonna take my tarp
and drape it over it.
That's all I'm gonna do.
The heck with it.
That's my shelter
for tonight.
*
You never know, when you
come out into the woods--
it could be an hour,
two days, three months
before you are
sick and tired of things
or something scares you
or, you know,
you miss your family too much
or whatever.
Your mind
gets ahold of you.
Hunger gets ahold of you,
whatever.
So you never know
what's gonna happen,
but I'm not sure
what could want me
to come out
of this place.
*
All right, after looking
at where I put my shelter,
I--this is my first
moron moment.
I was a moron
for putting it there.
The water's
right next to it,
but we're talking
by not very much.
That's a stupid place
to put a shelter.
My first moron moment.
That's all right.
It'll happen.
I can change it.
[water rushing]
I need to find
a shelter location.
The shelter location
I have sucks.
I could sleep there tonight
if I absolutely have to.
I would really rather
not sleep there.
I'm gonna follow
this creek up
and see what happens
after that.
[tense music]
*
Honestly, I still
can't believe
that I'm actually
out here doing this.
Before I came out here,
I shaved my beard.
It was kind of a
"I'm gonna start changing
the way that I live
my life now."
[soft music]
I've been married
a long time.
My two kids,
they're already grown up.
They already left.
This is my son.
This was
a graduation picture.
This is my daughter.
This is, uh,
my wife, Rachel.
So we've been
married for--
How long has it--
[both chuckling]
How long
has it been now?
27 years,
something like that?
- 26.
- I think what I want to put
in there next is my ax.
I just focused
my entire adult life--
after 18, basically--
in raising my kids.
Obviously, I love my wife
and I love
my family dearly,
but there comes a time
sometimes in a person's life
where they need to step back
away from their life
and have an experience,
have a journey,
a spiritual journey,
kind of.
I don't know how else
to explain it.
Like, really excited.
- I know you are.
And when you're out there,
remember us,
and remember
that we support you
and we love you
and we're really happy for you.
I love you.
- Love you too.
I want to step back away
from the life that I'm living
right now,
get a little more
introspective,
and find out
what's my next step in life.
- You're welcome.
There was never any question.
[ambient music]
- That is where
I came from.
Right down there.
I'm gonna keep up
this steep son of a gun
'cause I see this one overhang
is pretty small,
but there's
another huge one up there.
It looks like
it flattens out.
God, I hope it gets easier.
[laughs]
Oh, I need a shelter.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
Back up the mountain,
one step at a time.
[rain pattering]
*
It's crazy
walking here.
You can be walking along,
and then all of a sudden,
you can step in a hole, and you
can be up to your armpits,
or you can be down
to your ankle.
You never know.
It's not solid ground.
*
Oh, [bleep],
this next bit's gonna be fun.
*
It's just so thick.
Holy crap.
All right, onward.
*
[grunts]
[grunting]
Yeah, this is
pretty freaking steep.
*
I used to have [indistinct].
*
[bleep].
[grunts]
Damn it.
Fricking jacket's getting wet.
*
Damn it!
Stick in the eye,
stick in the eye.
*
Red alert, stick in the--
God.
[bleep].
Piece-of-[bleep] [bleep].
Get the [bleep]
out of my way, you [bleep].
[bleep] you.
Get the [bleep]
out of my way.
[bleep].
Damn it!
[bleep] hate this place.
*
[dramatic music]
*
- I've seen a lot of sign
of bear around here.
What I want to do is make sure
I have my food out of reach
and away from--
um, away from me as well.
That way, I don't
attract anything into my area.
[tense music]
*
In Iraq or in Afghanistan,
any of those places
that I've been before,
at least I know what--
what conditions
I'm gonna be in
and, you know,
what to expect,
and, you know,
at the end of the day,
I know I have, um,
other people there
that have my back.
If something happens
to me here,
the only person
you have is yourself.
Aw, man.
The fear factor
of the unknown,
it's just overwhelming.
[line snaps]
[bleep].
I won't be able to get it up
without the line breaking off.
Either have
to find some rope,
or I have to think of
a different option for tonight.
Let's go see if I can find
a different location.
[dramatic music]
*
- I can't believe
this weather.
It's amazing.
But after jumping off
the plane today
and getting
soaking wet,
my boots are wet,
and so I got to move fast.
I was hoping that maybe
I wouldn't need a fire tonight,
um, 'cause it's
warm enough,
but now that all my gear's wet,
I'm pretty much screwed.
Um...
so that--that was
all the unknowns
I was worried about.
[laughs]
It's what
makes me nervous.
It's thick.
It's dense.
It's green today,
but it's gonna be
dark tomorrow.
This is it.
This is it.
It's what I got.
It's here.
Let's do it.
*
Go look around here,
see what I got
for shelter space.
There's so much going through
my mind, it's--it's unreal.
I'm scared.
I'm nervous.
I'm excited!
Just the thought
of being alone
and--and the unknown,
it's--it's not gonna be easy.
I'm gonna set up over here,
I think, for the night.
So I'm gonna clean out
this area over here,
um, this way.
*
The hardest challenge
is going to be
leaving my children.
I miss my daughters
terribly.
They're always
on my mind.
Here--
- [giggling]
- Good girl.
My daughter's
all over the place.
She's four now.
- Hey, don't stop swinging.
- She does know
I'm gone.
She does know
that I love her.
Greta, she's just a baby,
uh, so I don't get
to talk to her much,
but I get to hear her.
She's rolling around.
She's doing good.
I was part
of the Hobart Hotshots
out of the
Tahoe National Forest.
Hotshots are
wildland firefighters.
They are known to be
the biggest, the best,
the strongest in the field.
And it was one of the hardest
challenges I've ever done.
What I learned
was that
mental strength can
get you just about anywhere.
I'm doing this
because I want to see
how far I can
actually make it.
How far mentally and physically
can I survive on my own?
I want my kids to say,
"My mom did that,"
or, "Why would
something stop me?
I can do that."
Are you gonna miss me?
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna go
high to low with this guy.
[sniffles]
I feel that if I pass
this adventure up,
I would be shorting myself
and my children,
because there should be
no limits in life.
There shouldn't--you should
push yourself
to your personal extremes
and see how far
you can always go
to better yourself
and those around you.
Uh, anyway,
it looks like [bleep].
It's kicking my ass.
I wasn't--
It's good.
It is what it is.
It's a large tarp.
I'm going to go ahead
and brace down
the other side of my tarp
so that it's usable
for tonight.
[tense music]
*
- Pretty much right now
just feeling, uh--
feeling the place out.
I haven't been
out here very long.
Couple hours.
Everywhere I go,
I'm starting to see
more and more
signs of bears.
Um, just, uh,
looking for a area
to set up my shelter.
Just want to stay focused,
don't want to start
getting upset right now.
Got a lot of things
to accomplish and do.
Anytime you get frustrated
out here in this environment,
it can, uh,
mess with you.
*
[animal calling]
I just heard a noise,
a loud noise, out there.
I'm not sure
where it was.
Um, it was kind of
a little far off, uh,
but definitely
heard something.
[whistles]
Hey, bear.
Yo, bear.
*
This is real now.
This is real.
*
[animal calling]
This is bad.
I got to get
out of here.
*
This is crazy.
*
*
- I got to get hustling.
I got much to do.
Well, I'm gonna get in here
and try to get things situated.
That way, I can make
the first night easy
and not stress myself out
too much.
[ambient music]
*
So I'm going to, uh,
get my shelter up
for tonight.
*
You never know what's
over your head unless you look.
And I'm gonna
show you why
it's so important
to look.
[wood cracks]
[exhales]
That could have
come down on me
while I was sleeping
with the right
kind of, uh,
wind coming
through here.
So...
always check above.
Look for, uh,
widowmakers,
deadfall.
'Cause you never know
what you got above your head.
*
There are certain skills,
you know, basic techniques
that if you
don't follow
and you suffer
a mechanical injury,
there's nobody here
to help you.
You have to know
how to help yourself
because rescue
is a ways away.
This is the type
of environment
that you need to know how
to effect self-rescue first.
If you don't, then it could
be pretty harsh for you,
and it could definitely
take you out.
That's difficult.
So I'm looking forward
to using that knowledge
that I have gained
over the years
in helping me
in this experience.
*
[gunshot]
I am former military
and former law enforcement.
[laughter]
I am very fortunate.
I still have my parents.
- All right,
good boy.
- I have my daughter
and my son,
three grandchildren,
and my best friend, Molly.
[dog growls]
[growls]
With the children
having grown and left,
living their lives,
Molly's always been there.
Molly, here.
I think she's upset
with me right now
because I am leaving.
For me, this is
a spiritual journey.
I'm looking forward
to having this time
to go within myself
to resolve a lot
of unanswered feelings
and emotions
and events
in my law enforcement
and military career.
- Be safe,
always.
Remember I love you.
- I love you too.
Been witness to a lot
of very difficult things.
I'm here
for the inner journey
and spiritual aspects
of healing myself.
*
I can't forget it,
but at least I can
make peace with it
and try to step forward
with a new perspective
and a new beginning.
All right.
One throw-together
temporary shelter.
This will get me
through tonight.
[dramatic music]
*
- Okay, well,
I'm gonna be brutally honest.
I am at a loss as to
what to do for a shelter.
I mean,
I want to do
a plow point of some sort,
but...
I thought
I'd have, like,
a little bit
of level ground.
And, I mean, I do have
a little tiny bit,
but it's right next
to this creek.
I've been up
along this ridgeline.
Tomorrow I'm gonna explore
around that ridgeline.
What I need
to do today
is quit
screwing around.
I need to start
cutting some logs.
*
So my preferred shelter
is a plow point shelter.
*
Basically what I do is,
I take a square tarp.
You take one corner
and you incline it
on a tree branch.
And I can drape my tarp
over the top of that.
Pretty tough to work
with a tarp
when you don't have
much real estate to work with.
*
And just manufacture
stakes.
And then I can stretch my tarp
tight enough
so I don't have
to worry about cordage.
That will at least work
for this first night.
*
Man, it's beautiful here.
Holy crap.
Wow.
*
- Um...
I'm being honest with you,
I'm feeling a little worried.
I feel like I bit off
more than I can chew,
uh, being out here
right now.
Um, a little frustrating.
[brooding music]
*
Didn't think I'd have a problem
worrying about animals,
but the minute
I seen that bear scat
when I got
off the boat,
um, really changed me.
It changed my whole psyche
about the--the situation.
*
The woods, they have
a eerie feeling about them.
The forest
is so dense.
Every little sound
that I hear is bothering me.
It's getting to me.
*
It's a different animal
being out here
and knowing you have
to do this all by yourself.
I know everything
to do.
I know--I know
what I want to do,
but going inside
them woods is, uh...
*
Just--I just don't know.
*
I got a military
background.
I'm thinking I'll be able
to go off in here
and turn on that switch
and, you know, just focus
on what I need to do
in order to survive.
But, uh,
as of right now...
*
As of right now,
I'm not, uh--
I'm not feeling it.
I'm not feeling it
at all.
[dramatic music]
*
- That's just incredible.
[sniffles]
Check this out.
The whole place
is a mussel bed.
Look at that.
Everything right here.
Mussels...
are my absolute
favorite.
This would be
enough food
that I could collect
every day...
[sniffles]
and not run out
for six months,
and I can't touch it.
*
When we came out here,
they told us that we
could not partake
in any of the shellfish
out here
because of red tide.
*
Ugh.
This is tough.
This is
a hard part.
It's so hard looking
at something so awesome
knowing that it
could kill you.
This is one
of those little things
that rocks your world.
[sniffles]
Ugh.
*
- Right now, this is feeling
like the toughest thing
I've ever done
in my life.
It's like I had
all these ideas in my head
about what
I wanted to do,
but everything just went
out the window.
It's like I don't
know anything right now.
It's like I'm--
I've never been
out here
in the woods.
My entire morale
just went
down the drain.
*
This was
a personal choice
to come and do something
to make a better living
for myself
and my family.
I don't know
that it was right decision.
At this point
right now,
all I want to do
is go back home.
*
[somber ambient music]
*
- I mean,
it was just--
I-I just never experienced
nothing like that before.
*
I'm good.
So I guess
I'm officially tapping.
*
I'm good.
*
Got a lot of people
looking up to me
to do good things.
I'm feeling like
I've let them down.
*
It's a different animal
being out here
and knowing you have
to do this all by yourself.
*
I mean, 'cause
when they say "alone,"
you're really alone.
[ominous music]
*
[rain pattering]
[branches rustling]
*
- I believe
I hear...
*
The neighborhood
residents.
I just have not
seen any.
But my thought
is that
they will come
to visit tonight.
*
[rain pattering]
*
[branches snapping]
There was a crashing
through the brush.
*
It is just amazing
the amount of noise
that I'm hearing
in the woods here.
*
I mean, I figured
I'd hear a bit,
but this is
quite a bit.
*
[branches rustling]
Like that.
[branches rustling]
*
[branches snapping]
*
[dramatic music]
*
[rain pattering]
- It's raining.
It's gonna
be raining
cats and dogs
probably all day.
My shelter's
holding up okay, though.
That's all
that matters.
[sighs]
And my boots
are still wet,
which pisses me off.
I can't stop
thinking about that.
I don't have
dry boots.
[sighs]
All right, I'm gonna try
and go back to bed.
*
[rain pattering]
- [laughs]
*
Well, let's see here.
*
See if we see
an eye shine back,
'cause I heard...
*
I am mostly concerned
with the cougars.
I will do my very best
to stay out of their way
and let them do
what they need to do
to get through
their winter,
and I'm hoping
they'll do the same for me.
But when you weigh
275 pounds,
you learn that running
isn't much of an option,
so you better
be ready to fight.
Hopefully, they will
find me not interesting.
*
Little thump-thumps
in the night.
*
[dramatic music]
*
- [sighs]
*
[sighs]
It rained all night.
No big surprise.
[sighs]
I'm still just pissed off
about my boots.
I can't--
It's gonna be days
before my boots dry out.
Days.
*
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Stop right there.
I'm finding all kinds
of [bleep] water
in my tent.
The bottom of my bag
is soaking wet.
*
My sleeping bag
is down,
and once down gets wet,
it's near impossible
to get dry
in these conditions,
and I need
a dry sleeping bag.
*
[ominous music]
*
All of my kindling,
everything I collected,
wet.
Soaking wet.
What the hell?
[exhales]
I screwed up.
Day one.
All my [bleep]'s wet.
[sighs]
First things first.
Ridgepole check.
So I plan on
building, uh,
the same sort of structure,
an A-frame.
The construction
that will be different
is the fact
that I'm going to tie
my grommets together
underneath,
and then I'm going
to put the grommets
under my ridgepole.
Uh, point being
that the rain
can't get in
on the sides at all.
The rain will come in
from underneath.
And then from there,
I have an extra tarp
as one of my items,
and I'm going to lay that
on the floor
and create a boat
so that if any water sheds
from the inside of the tarp,
it misses me
in the center of the boat.
I put that green tarp
on top
so if any water comes in
on my ground tarp,
my bottom tarp
should stay dry.
Hopefully.
See, it's all up
on the sides there.
*
If I can stay dry,
I can stay out here
as long as I want to.
*
*
- Where to look for firewood
in a rain forest...
When it's dry out,
no less?
Winter's gonna be
a bitch.
*
[snipping]
[exhales]
All of that just
for one little handful
of firewood
that's wet anyway.
[ambient music]
*
Let's hope I can
get this fire going.
[flint striking]
*
Wow, winter's gonna be
a pain in the butt, man.
*
I'm just...
*
This creek by me,
I know it's gonna swell
as soon
as the rains start.
And trying to make
a move in the rain
is just gonna be
just a pain.
So I don't know.
[sniffles]
*
The alone part
doesn't bother me
at all,
but it's only
been two days.
But just the--
the crappy-ass shelter
that I made
and the freaking difficulty
I'm having with fire
and just the steep terrain
is kicking my butt.
I mean, if--if I--
if the terrain
was just even just
a little bit easier...
These have got to be
just about the hardest woods
I've ever had
to try to survive in.
I just feel like
I'm not, uh,
performing
like I should be.
*
[insects chirping]
*
[bears grunting]
*
There's a bear outside.
[bear growls]
Hey, don't come over here.
[bear grunting]
Sounds like
a damn bear to me.
I don't know
what else it could be.
[harsh voice]
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
[dramatic music]
- It is not easy going
up here.
Oh, ah.
- I woke up, and the whole side
of my shelter was glowing.
I almost caught
the entire forest on fire.
- It's basically fighting
an inner battle all day long.
I can't do no more!
- I way underestimated
this place.
[air horn blares]
- You heard me, get!
[air horn blares]
- One wrong move
and I'm done.
- Ooh!
- What am I doing
out here?
- Look at that.
Squished mouse,
my favorite.
- Oh!
- God, I just feel like
I'm letting her down.
- I'm slowly
dying of starvation.
- Oh, my God.
Mama bear just stood up
on her hind legs.
Not good.
*