'Allo 'Allo (1982–1992): Season 6, Episode 2 - The Gestapo for the High Jump - full transcript

The Gestapo wants to find the headquarters of the Resistance by pretending to be shot-down British airmen.

( theme music playing )

AS YOU MAY IMAGINE
FROM THE ACTIVITY YOU ARE SEEING,

I HAVE BEEN UNDER
A GREAT STRAIN.

OW! THAT HURTS!

THE REASON FOR THIS WILL
BE EASY TO UNDERSTAND, IF HARD TO BELIEVE.

THE RESISTANCE
HAVE DEVELOPED A NEW TELESCOPIC RADIO AERIAL,

WHICH WAS CONCEALED
IN A TOMB IN THE CHURCHYARD.

I WAS, UNFORTUNATELY,
ASTRIDE AND ABOVE THIS MECHANISM,

WHEN MY STUPID WIFE
OPERATED THE SWITCH.

THE AERIAL CAME UP
BETWEEN MY LEGS,

MADE A MIRACULOUS DIVERSION
AT A CRITICAL MOMENT,



CAUGHT ON THE COLLAR
OF MY OVERCOAT,

AND THRUST ME UPWARDS
THROUGH THE OPEN GRAVE,

LEAVING ME SUSPENDED
ABOUT 10 FEET IN THE AIR.

LIEUTENANT GRUBER,
WHO WAS PRESENT AT THE TIME,

THOUGHT THAT I WAS THE GHOST
OF MY DEAD TWIN BROTHER.

AND WAS LAST SEEN
WITH HIS EYES ON STALKS,

LEGGING IT THROUGH
THE LYCH-GATE.

AND THAT IS WHY
I AM STIFF ALL OVER.

( groaning )

HAVE MY HANDS
RELAXED YOU?

UP TO A POINT, YES.

OH, RENE.

JUST THE SIGHT OF YOU
IN YOUR VEST

HAS SENT EROTIC THOUGHTS
COURSING THROUGH MY BRAIN.



IT DOES NOT TAKE MUCH
TO GET YOU GOING, DOES IT?

OOH! IT STILL HURTS
LIKE HELL, YOU KNOW.

LIE FLAT ON THE TABLE.
LET THE BLOOD CIRCULATE.

THAT WILL TAKE
AWAY THE HURT.

SIT, LIE
ABSOLUTELY FLAT.

PUT THIS CUSHION
UNDER YOUR HEAD,

AND I WILL BE BACK
IN FIVE MINUTES.

OH, THANK YOU, YVETTE,
YOU DEAR SWEET CHILD.

OH, RENE, WHEN WE
ARE MARRIED,

I WILL DO THIS FOR YOU
EVERY MORNING.

I HOPE I WILL NOT BE
IN THIS STATE EVERY MORNING.

OH, RENE.

OH, YVETTE.

'ALLO, ELAINE.

HOW IS MONSIEUR RENE?

OH, HE IS IN
A TERRIBLE STATE.

HE HAS TWISTED EVERY
MUSCLE IN HIS BODY.

BEFORE I JOINED
THE RESISTANCE,

I WAS ASSISTANT TO
A VERY FAMOUS OSTEOPATH.

I'M SURE
I CAN HELP YOU.

SEE WHAT YOU CAN DO.

HE IS IN THERE.

HELLO, MONSIEUR RENE.

( moans )
WHO ARE YOU?

MY NAME IS ELAINE CERISE,
BUT MY FRIENDS CALL ME E.C.

AH, RIGHT.

IN MY CONDITION,
I DO NOT WISH TO KNOW THAT.

NOW WHERE IS THE PAIN?

OH, EVERYWHERE.

DOES THIS HURT?

- OW, YES!
- AND THIS?

THAT IS WORSE!

THIS ALL COMES
FROM THE BACK OF THE NECK.

I KNOW WELL
THIS CONDITION.

YOU MUST RELAX
COMPLETELY.

ARE YOU SURE YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU ARE DOING?

TRUST ME.
( knuckles crack )

( moaning )

YOU ARE NOT RELAXING,

TAKE IN A DEEP BREATH.

BREATHE IN,
BREATHE OUT.

BREATHE IN,
BREATHE OUT.

NOW!

Yvette:
LIEUTENANT GRUBER IS--

Gruber: RENE...

HAVE I CAUGHT YOU
AT AN AWKWARD MOMENT?

YOU COULD SAY THAT.

- YOU SENT FOR ME,
HERR FLICK? - YES, HELGA.

HAVE YOU OBTAINED FOR ME
THE BRITISH PARACHUTES?

I FORGED THE REQUEST
ON THE GENERAL'S VERY OWN NOTEPAPER.

WHERE ARE THEY?

BRING THEM IN HERE!

GO AWAY!

WELL DONE, HELGA.

WHEN DO YOU INTEND
TO PUT INTO OPERATION

YOU INGENIOUS PLAN
TO COMMANDEER

A CAPTURED BRITISH
WELLINGTON BOMBER

WITH ARTIFICIAL SMOKE
BELCHING FROM THE ENGINE,

FROM WHICH YOU WILL LEAP
DISGUISED AS BRITISH AIRMEN,

HOPING TO BE PICKED UP
BY THE RESISTANCE

AND TAKEN TO THEIR SECRET
HEADQUARTERS,

SO YOU MAY INFILTRATE
THE RESISTANCE, ESCAPE,

AND ORGANIZE
THEIR CAPTURE?

CONGRATULATIONS, HELGA.
YOU HAVE EXPOUNDED THE PLOT WELL.

IT IS BECAUSE YOU HOLD SUCH
SNAKELIKE FASCINATION FOR ME.

IN ANSWER TO YOUR
RECENT QUERY,

WE INTEND TO PUT
THE PLAN INTO EFFECT

AS SOON AS VON SMALLHAUSEN
HAS PERFECTED HIS DISGUISE.

VON SMALLHAUSEN?

Flick:
WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I THINK THE REALITY
IS DESTROYED BY THE CRICKET BAT.

I KEEP TELLING HIM.

HOW MANY TIMES
HAVE I TO TELL YOU,

DON'T TAKE
THE CRICKET BAT?

LEAVE THE BAT BEHIND.

I'M SORRY, HERR FLICK.
I THOUGHT I WOULD TRY ONCE MORE.

IT IS A LEN HUTTON.

NO.

WILL THEY NOT BE SUSPICIOUS
IF YOU DO NOT SPEAK ENGLISH?

POINT ONE-- VERY FEW
FRENCH PEASANTS SPEAK ENGLISH.

ESPECIALLY
COMMUNIST ONES.

POINT TWO-- WE HAVE BEEN
STUDYING THE ENGLISH

WITH THE AID OF A RECORD
FROM THE GESTAPO LIBRARY,

ENTITLED, "HOW TO FOOL
THE FRENCH THAT YOU ARE ENGLISH

IN ONE EASY LESSON."

VON SMALLHAUSEN,
DEMONSTRATE.

♪ FA FA FA FA
FA FA FA FA ♪

♪ FA FA FA FA FA
FA FA FA. ♪

BIG BEN.

INCREDIBLE.
I, WHO DO NOT SPEAK ENGLISH,

WOULD BE COMPLETELY
DECEIVED.

THANK YOU, HELGA.

♪ FA FA FA FA
FA FA FA FA ♪

♪ FA FA FA FA
FA FA FA FA ♪

- ♪ FA FA FA-- ♪
- SHUT UP!

HERE, LIEUTENANT GRUBER.

- HAVE ANOTHER COGNAC.
- THANK YOU, YVETTE.

AH, THERE YOU ARE,
LIEUTENANT.

I'M SORRY TO HAVE
LEFT YOU.

I WAS A LITTLE BIT
TIED UP.

PLEASE COME OVER HERE.
I WISH TO TALK TO YOU.

OH.

SIT DOWN, RENE.

YOU'LL FIND ME
A LITTLE DISTURBED,

BECAUSE APART
FROM SEEING YOU

IN THAT INTERESTING
POSITION, I--

I HAVE RECENTLY HAD
A TERRIBLE SHOCK.

OH, DEAR.

I HAVE SEEN THE GHOST
OF YOUR DEAD TWIN BROTHER.

- NO.
- YES.

HE ROSE FROM THE TOMB
IN HIS OVERCOAT AND BOWLER HAT.

AND, RENE,
HE FORGAVE ME-- FOR SHOOTING HIM.

THAT WAS NICE OF HIM.

YES, IT WAS
A BIZARRE EXPERIENCE, I CAN TELL YOU.

AND YET AT THE SAME TIME,
IT WAS VERY REASSURING

TO KNOW THAT THERE IS
LIFE AFTER DEATH.

AND THAT ONE IS
STILL WELL-DRESSED.

YES, WELL, ANYWAY,

THIS PHENOMENON HAS
CONVINCED ME EVEN MORE STRONGLY

THAT I MUST GIVE YOU
A WARNING.

THERE IS A PLOT
AFOOT, RENE,

THAT COULD GET YOU
INTO GREAT DANGER.

THE GESTAPO ARE GOING
TO DISGUISE THEMSELVES AS BRITISH AIRMEN,

IN THE HOPE
THAT THE RESISTANCE WILL CAPTURE THEM

AND LEAD THEM
TO THEIR HEADQUARTERS.

WHY ARE YOU TELLING
ME THIS, LIEUTENANT?

I DO NOT KNOW
THE RESISTANCE.

I AM MOST RELIVED
TO HEAR THIS.

NOT THAT I AM
CONCERNED, OF COURSE,

BUT WHEN WILL THIS PLAN
BE PUT INTO OPERATION?

WELL, ALTHOUGH IT DOES
NOT CONCERN YOU...

IF I SHOULD HEAR ANYMORE
I WILL, OF COURSE, LET YOU KNOW.

THANK YOU, LIEUTENANT.

OH, AND RENE,
IF I AM WITH THE COLONEL,

IT MAY BE DIFFICULT
TO SPEAK, SO I WILL GIVE YOU A SIGN.

OH, THAT IS VERY KIND,
LIEUTENANT.

WHAT WILL
THIS SIGN BE?

WELL, THIS WILL MEAN
THAT IT IS ON FOR TONIGHT.

YES, WELL,
IT USUALLY DOES.

( bell chimes )

- RENE!
- ( shrieks )

WHAT ARE YOU
DOING THERE?

I OVERHEARD
EVERY WORD.

THIS IS A VERY
SERIOUS SITUATION.

WE DARE NOT NOW
RESCUE ANY BRITISH AIRMEN

IN CASE THEY TURN OUT
TO BE THE GESTAPO IN DISGUISE.

YOU ARE RIGHT.
YOU MUST DISMANTLE THE WHOLE ORGANIZATION.

WE HAVE HAD A GOOD RUN.
THANK YOU, MICHELLE, FOR ALL YOU HAVE DONE.

NO NO, I WILL
THINK OF A PLAN.

WHATEVER THE PLAN IS,
I WANT NO PART OF IT.

YOU! YOU ARE
IN IT UP TO HERE!

WHAT IS MORE, BY YOUR
CLUMSINESS AND INCOMPETENCE,

THE MECHANISM OF THE AERIAL
IN THE TOMB IS COMPLETELY KNACKERED.

YOU OWE US ONE,
AND IT WILL GO DOWN ON YOUR REPORT AS A BLACK MARK.

WOULD YOU LIKE ME
TO DO A HUNDRED LINES AS WELL?

- WHO WAS THAT?
- MICHELLE.

THAT GIRL IS BEGINNING
TO GET RIGHT UP MY NOSE.

- OH, RENE, YOU NEED
A HOLIDAY. - OWWW.

WHY DO WE NOT RETURN
TO THAT LITTLE HOTEL

ON THE COAST
WHERE WE USED TO GO BEFORE THE WAR?

- THE ONE WITH
THE LITTLE GOLF COURSE? - THAT IS THE ONE.

OH, YES, I REMEMBER IT.
NINE HOLES.

DO YOU REMEMBER
HOW WE USED TO LAUGH AT YOUR BIG HANDICAP?

WELL, YOU MORE THAN ME.

OH, RENE, THESE ARE
SUCH DANGEROUS TIMES IN WHICH WE LIVE.

IF I SHOULD
BE STRUCK DOWN, WOULD YOU MARRY AGAIN?

WELL, POSSIBLY, EDITH,
OUT OF LONELINESS, YOU KNOW.

WOULD YOU TAKE HER
TO THAT SAME LITTLE HOTEL

WHERE WE BOTH KNEW
SUCH HAPPINESS?

POSSIBLY, TO TRY TO FIND
THAT HAPPINESS AGAIN.

WOULD YOU PLAY
ON THE SAME GOLF COURSE?

WELL, IT WOULD
BE SOMETHING TO DO.

YOU WOULD NOT
GIVE HER MY CLUBS, WOULD YOU?

- OH, DEFINITELY NOT.
- OH, RENE.

BECAUSE OF YOUR
LOVE FOR ME.

NO, SHE IS LEFT-HANDED.

OH, RENE.

OH, JUST A LITTLE JOKE,
MY SWEET.

( doorbell chimes )

GOOD MOANING.

GOOD MOANING.

I HAVE A BOON
TO PECK WITH YOU.

OH, YES?

LAST NIT,
YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SEND A MASSAGE,

SO THAT THE BRITISH
SUBMAROONE COULD MEET THE EARMEN.

RENE, WE FORGOT
ABOUT THE AIRMEN.

WELL, SOMEONE SHOULD'VE
TIPPED ME THE WONK.

FOR THE LAST 24 WHORES,

THEY HAVE BEEN
STANDING IN WITTER UP TO THEIR NICKS.

OH, RENE, THEY WERE
UNDER THE UPTURNED BATH

IN THE ESTUARY,
WAITING FOR THE SUBMARINES.

- YES, WE ARE VERY SORRY.
- SO I SHOULD THONK.

YOU MADE ME LOOK
A RIGHT DUCKHEAD.

GOOD DOO TO YOU BOTH.

( chuckles )

NEWS OF OUR ENGAGEMENT
SPREADS QUICKLY.

COME, FANNIE,
YOU MUST BE TIRED.

YES, MAMA.

COME AND SIT DOWN.

SHE HAS BEEN SHOPPING
FOR HER BOTTOM DRAWER.

WHAT HAS SHE BOUGHT,
MOTHBALLS?

EDITH, COME HERE.

DO YOU THINK
THAT I SHOULD GET MARRIED IN WHITE?

WHY NOT?
YOU ALWAYS HAVE DONE BEFORE.

SEE?
IT IS IN THE PAPER!

"THE ENGAGEMENT IS ANNOUNCED
BETWEEN ERNEST LECLERC,

SON OF ANDRE LECLERC,
THE POPULAR PARIS CONDUCTOR..."

- SYMPHONY?
- BUSES.

"...AND FANNIE LAFANNE,
LATE OF THE FOLIES BERGERES."

HOW LATE CAN YOU GET?

EDITH,

ERNEST WOULD LIKE RENE
TO BE THE BEST MAN.

Edith:
OF COURSE.

HE WOULD BE HONORED.

AND I WOULD LIKE
THE SERVING GIRLS

TO BE THE BRIDESMAIDS;

AND YOU, OF COURSE, EDITH,
TO BE MY MATRON OF HONOR.

OH, YOU WILL
ALL BE DRESSED

IN BILLOWING
CHAMPAGNE LACE.

HANG ON, WHO IS PAYING
FOR ALL THIS?

OH, RENE, DO NOT BE
SUCH AN OLD SKINFLINT.

CAN YOU NOT SEE
HOW HAPPY THEY BOTH ARE?

LOOK AT THE SMILE
ON THEIR WRINKLED OLD FACES.

COME, ERNEST.

HELP ME UP
TO MY ROOM.

OH, MAMA,
THERE IS JUST ONE MORE THING:

WHO IS TO GIVE
YOU AWAY?

WELL, THAT IS
THE SADNESS.

THERE IS NOBODY LEFT.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
WE WILL MAKE YOU THIS WEEK'S AMAZING FREE GIFT.

YOU DID WELL
TO DISCOVER THIS PLAN.

THANK YOU, GENERAL.
ALL IN A DAY'S WORK.

ALL OF THE CREDIT SHOULD
GO TO THE BEAUTIFUL HELGA.

SHUT UP!

IT IS VITAL
THAT THE CREDIT FOR THE DISCOVERY

OF THE RESISTANCE HEADQUARTERS
AND THE ESCAPE ROUTE OF THE BRITISH AIRMEN

SHOULD NOT GO
TO THE GESTAPO.

TO THWART THEIR PLANS,
THIS IS WHAT WE SHALL DO:

WE SHALL ADOPT
THEIR PLAN, BUT PUT IT INTO OPERATION FIRST.

WHAT A BRILLIANT
AND ORIGINAL THOUGHT.

THANK YOU.

YOU ARE ONLY A PRIVATE,
BUT RIPE FOR PROMOTION.

GENERAL, OUR FACES
ARE FAMILIAR.

WE CAN NOT PASS
OURSELVES OFF AS BRITISH AIRMEN.

MY MEN HAVE THE FACES
THAT IS NOT-A KNOWN.

ME, I AM NOT
SURE OF THEM MYSELF.

EXCELLENT. THEY WILL
BE DRESSED IN CAPTURED BRITISH FLYING CLOTHES.

THE ANTIAIRCRAFT BARRIERS
WILL FIRE BLANK SHELLS

AT THE CAPTURED
BRITISH AIRPLANE,

THEY WILL JUMP OUT,
THE RESISTANCE WILL PICK THEM UP

AND LEAD THEM
TO THEIR SECRET HEADQUARTERS.

- WONDERFUL
- MARVELOUS.

I SEE A TEENSY-WEENSY
SNAG.

IF I GET TOO CLOSE
WITH MY TROOPS,

THEY WILL SPOT US.

AND IF I'M
TOO FAR AWAY, WE WILL LOSE THEM.

IT IS VERY SIMPLE,
COLONEL.

THE ITALIAN SOLDIERS
WILL HAVE IN THEIR POCKETS ANISEED BALLS.

THEY WILL DROP A BALL
EVERY 10 METERS.

WE WILL OBTAIN TRACKER DOGS
WHO WILL HAVE NO DIFFICULTY IN FOLLOWING THE SCENT.

AN INCREDIBLY
BRILLIANT SOLUTION.

THE PLAN IS WORTHY
OF ROMMEL.

THANK YOU,
LANCE CORPORAL HELGA.

IN FACT, I'D SAY,
IT WAS WORTHY OF HITLER HIMSELF.

ONE STRIPE
IS ALL YOU'RE GETTING.

( off-key )
♪ DON'T YOU KNOW, LITTLE FOOL ♪

♪ YOU NEVER CAN WIN? ♪

♪ USE YOUR MENTALITY ♪

♪ WAKE UP TO REALITY ♪

♪ BUT EACH TIME I DO,
JUST THE THOUGHT OF YOU ♪

♪ MAKES ME STOP-- ♪

HAS SHE FINISHED?

NO SUCH LUCK.

♪ BEFORE I BEGIN ♪

♪ FOR I'VE GOT YOU ♪

♪ UNDER MY SKIN. ♪

RENE, MICHELLE--
BACKROOM.

OH HECK.
MONSIEUR LECLERC-- BAR.

LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY,
I SHALL SAY THIS ONLY ONCE.

HERE IS THE PLAN:

WHEN THE GESTAPO DISGUISED
AS BRITISH AIRMEN LAND,

THEY WILL BE TAKEN
BY AGENT CRABTREE,

WHO WILL BE DISGUISED AS
A MEMBER OF THE RESISTANCE,

TO AN OLD DISUSED
CHATEAU.

YOU WILL MEET THEM THERE,
BUT YOU ALSO WILL BE DISGUISED,

SO THAT YOU
WILL NEVER BE TRACED FROM A DESCRIPTION.

YOU WILL LOCK THEM
IN THE CELLAR AND DISAPPEAR.

AND THE GERMANS WILL SPEND
WEEKS LOOKING FOR PEOPLE WHO DO NOT EXIST.

I DO NOT BELIEVE
WHAT I AM HEARING.

YOU HAD BETTER
SAY IT ALL AGAIN.

BUT HOW DO WE DISGUISE
OURSELVES IN SUCH A MANNER?

WE HAVE NO EXPERIENCE.

MY GIRLS COME
FROM MANY WALKS OF LIFE.

ONE OF THEM WAS MAKEUP ADVISOR
TO BORIS KARLOFF.

ALL WE HAVE TO DO NOW IS
TO FIND OUT FROM YOUR CONTACT

WHEN THE JUMP
IS TO TAKE PLACE.

- ( knocks )
- Gruber: RENE?

RENE, I HAVE TO BE
GOING NOW.

IT IS TONIGHT?

COLONEL, GENERAL,

CAPTAIN BERTORELLI
IS HERE WITH HIS MEN.

GOOD, LET THEM
BE BROUGHT IN.

CAPTAIN BERTORELLI
AND HIS MEN!

GENERALLY, I HAVE-A
THE GOOD NEWS, EH?

OH, COLONELO,
MY FRIEND.

HOW'S IT
GOING ON, EH?

EVERYTHING
IS SET UP.

I PICK-A THE FOUR
MOST BRAVE VOLUNTEERS.

YOU MEET THEM, EH?

HERE, BRAVE TROOPS,

YOU COME HERE, YOU SAY
HELLO TO THE GENERALLY AND THE COLONEL!

( all greeting )

COLONEL,
HOW'RE YOU DOING?

ABSOLUTE SHOWER.

HAVE THEY
BEEN BRIEFED?

- YEAH, I TELL
THEM EVERYTHING. - GOOD.

HELGA, HAND OUT THE UNIFORMS
AND PARACHUTES.

PARACHUTES?
HEY, WHAT FOR WE NEED-A THE PARACHUTES?

YOU'RE IN THE AIRPLANO,
STUPIDO.

YOU'RE THE BRITISH PILOTS.

ALL THE TIME,
YOU WEAR THE PARACHUTES.

GRUBER, HAND OUT
THE ANISEED BALLS.

OH, YEAH.
HERE THEY ARE. THERE ARE 50 EACH.

WOW, IS THIS SWEETIES?

NICE, MY FAVORITE!

YOU NO EAT-A
THE ANISEED BALLS.

YOU PUT THEM
IN YOUR POCKET LIKE I TELL YOU.

WHEN YOU'RE IN THE WOODS,
YOU WALK.

AND EVERY 20 PACES,
YOU DROP THE BALLS.

- REMEMBER?
- SI.

THEN TELL ME
WHAT YOU DO EVERY 20 PACES.

- WE DROP-A THE BALLS.
- AGAIN!

WE DROP-A THE BALLS!

HERE ARE
THE DISGUISES.

HERE WE HAVE DISGUISE.
ONE EACH.

THERE YOU GO.
VERY GOOD.

General:
PUT THEM ON.

PUT IN THE PIPES.

NOW YOU DO THE ENGLISH.

All:
♪ FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA. ♪

I CAN HEAR
THE PLANES.

WHY ARE THEY
SHOOTING AT THEM?

THEY ARE USING
BLANK SHELLS TO TRY TO FOOL US

THAT THEY ARE
BRITISH PLANES.

WE KNOW BETTER.

IT IS LUCKY
WE ARE ON THE BALL.

WHEN I JOINED
BRITISH INTOLLIGONCE

I DID NIT KNOW THAT
I WAS GOING TO BE A TRANSVESTUTE.

DRESSED LIKE THAT,
THEY WILL NEVER RECOGNIZE YOU.

THANK GID FOR THAT.

WILL THE MUSTACHE
NOT GIVE HIM AWAY?

MANY OF THE PEASANT
GIRLS IN THE RESISTANCE DO NOT SHAVE.

- ( plane engine hums )
- THEY'RE GETTING NEAR.

STAND BY
TO LEAD THEM TO THE CHATEAU.

RIGHT, WE MUST
STAND BY.

IT SEEMS
A LONG WAY DOWN!

HOW LONG
WILL IT TAKE US TO REACH THE GROUND?

IF YOU
FORGET TO PULL THE LITTLE RING,

ABOUT 10 SECONDS.

HOW WILL WE KNOW
WHEN TO JUMP?

THERE WILL BE
A RED LIGHT FLASHING.

IT IS FLASHING NOW.

ONE... TWO... THREE...

FOUR... FIVE... SIX.

( screams )

I SEE PLANES.

OUR GUNS ARE
SHOOTING THE BLANKS?

HERE COMES
LIEUTENANT GRUBER IN HIS LITTLE TANK.

I HOPE
HE HAS WITH HIM THE TRACKER DOGS.

GOOD EVENING, GENERAL.

DO YOU HAVE WITH YOU
THE TRACKER DOGS?

- UH... YES.
- GOOD.

DO NOT RELEASE THEM
UNTIL WE SEE THE PARACHUTES LEAVING THE PLANES.

YES, GENERAL.

- CAPITANO!
- SI.

IT'S A LONG
WAY DOWN.

OF COURSE IT'S
A LONG WAY DOWN.

YOU'RE IN
THE AEROPLANE,

AND YOU NO EAT
THE BALLS!

WHERE DO WE LAND?

I NO SEE THE AERODROME!

WHO SAY ANYTHING
ABOUT THE AERODROME?

DO I TALK TO YOU
ABOUT THE AERODROME?

THEN HOW DO WE LAND?

YOU MAKE THE JUMP,

YOU PULL THE STRING,

YOU FLOAT DOWN,
YOU HIT THE GROUND.

CAPITANO,

WE NO WANT
TO MAKE THE JUMP.

ARE YOU THE MEN
OR ARE YOU THE MICE?

WE ARE THE MICE.

I SEE.

NOW YOU ARE
THE FLYING MICE.

( bell rings )

DO NOT FORGET-A
TO PULL THE STRING!

THE PARACHUTES
HAVE LANDED OVER THERE.

GO TO IT.

WHAT IS
THE MATTER?

THE ELASTIC HAS GONE
ON MY KNACKERS.

REMEMBER, FROM NOW ON,
YOU ARE ENGLISH.

Crabtree:
PSST! FOLLOW MOO.

Both:
♪ FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA. ♪

THE PARACHUTES HAVE
LANDED IN THE CLEARING BEHIND THE WOODS.

RELEASE
THE BLOODHOUNDS.

POODLES.
IS THAT THE BEST YOU COULD DO?

ALL THE BIG DOGS
ARE AT THE DOG SHOW.

I COMMANDEERED THESE
FROM THE LADIES OF THE TOWN,

AND I PROMISED
TO HAVE THEM BACK BY HALF PAST 9:00.

GO! FIND.
SEEK. FETCH.

I THINK THEY'RE
ONLY USED TO FOLLOWING THE LADIES OF THE TOWN.

HELGA,
HEAD FOR THE WOODS

WHERE THEY CAN PICK UP
THE IRRESISTIBLE SCENT OF THE ANISEED.

COME ALONG.
FOLLOW ME, DARLINGS.

( bell rings )

I MUST LEAVE YOU NOW.

I HAVE TO POWDER
MY KNEES.

GOOD LICK.

DID YOU GET
HER DESCRIPTION?

6'4", MUSTACHE,

BIG EARS, KNICKERS
ROUND ANKLES.

SHE SHOULD BE
EASY TO TRACE.

( door creaks )

Both:
♪ FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA. ♪

( cackles )

WE HAVE BEEN
EXPECTING YOU.

WELCOME.
WELCOME.

CHANTAL, THEY ARE HERE.
( cackles )

YOU HAVE ARRIVED
AT A BAD TIME.

THE BARON IS HAVING
ONE OF HIS TURNS.

( growling )

DO NOT LET HIM LOOSE.
THEY ARE FRIENDS.

WHY, IT WILL BE ALL RIGHT
IF HE SNIFFS THEM.

( growls )

( cackles )
SEE? HE LIKES THE LITTLE ONE.

KEEP A TIGHT HOLD.

HE HAS NOT EATEN
FLESH THIS DAY.

BACK. BACK!

OW OW OW.
OW!

COME, WE WILL HIDE YOU
IN THE DUNGEONS.

NO ONE WILL EVER
FIND YOU THERE.

( cackles )

( gasping )
DINNER IS SERVED.

( ringing )

WE THINK, IF IT IS
ALL THE SAME TO YOU,

WE WILL HEAD TO THE COAST
AND TRY SWIMMING.

( growling )

BACK!
BACK!

BACK!

( theme music playing )