Alias Smith and Jones (1971–1973): Season 3, Episode 6 - What Happened at the XST? - full transcript

This show could also be called "Alias Frank Canton." An outlaw the boys rode with in Texas got into a little too much hot water, hightailed it north, changed his name and passed himself off as a lawman. As such, he became sheriff of Johnson County and chief enforcer for the Wyoming Stock Growers' Association. "Canton" is willing to tolerate Smith and Jones for a while as long as they don't call him by his real name -- which they have an annoying habit of doing. In "Heaven's Gate," Canton has an even larger role (in fact, he's an association member who hires all the killers) -- and is killed at the end by Jim Averill; in this episode, a title card over a freeze-frame shows that he outlived the Johnson County War by forty years, went back to Texas, begged a pardon from a new governor and became a high-ranking Oklahoma state executive.

Get going!
Ring it, ring it, bang that thing.

Everybody outta here!

Come on outta here,
I got an important announcement to make.

This is an order.

Come out, fellas.

All right now, you listen close you fellas, 'cause I'm only gonna say this once.

Sheriff Canton's got Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry all over the KC.

And he wants everybody down there to help him out.

And he's gonna split the reward with everybody who shows up, so let's go.

Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry.

The two most successful outlaws
in the history of the West.



And in all the trains and banks they robbed,
they never shot anyone.

This made our two
Kansas cousins very popular.

With everyone
but the railroads and the banks.

One thing we gotta get Heyes.
What's that?

Outta this business.

The governor can't come flat out
and give you amnesty now.

First you gotta prove you deserve it.

Lom, are you saying that all
we have to do is stay out of trouble

until the governor figures
that we deserved amnesty?

And in the meantime
we'll still be wanted?

That's true.

Till then only you me and the governor
will know about it.

It'll be our secret.

That's a good deal?



I sure wish the governor would let a
few more people in on our secret.

Kid, you ever notice anything odd about the snow in Wyoming?

Yeah, yeah, I've Heyes.

You have what?

I've noticed something odd about the snow in Wyoming.

Doesn't melt.

It just blows around till he wears out.

Well, I'm sorry.

But you said it before and when you say something worth remembering,

I remember it.

Howdy, ma'am.

Ma'am.
Afternoon, boys.

Could you tell us how much further it is to Buffalo?

You're almost there.

Less'n five miles on, I reckon.

Well, thank you, ma'am.

Say, we were trying to recall who's the sheriff this year in Johnson County.

Same as last year

and the year before that.

Frank Canton.

Well, thank you ma'am.

You're welcome.

Good luck.

Good luck to you.

Frank Canton.

Never ran into him.

Nope, things are still looking good.

Still?
When did I ever say things looked good?

Well, at least the sheriff's a stranger.

Now I just take three cards.

Well, did you spot 'em?

Yup.

One of 'em is sitting over there next to Jack Slag on his left.

The other one's over to the other table.

with Billy Hill and Luke Webb.

Has our friend checked in yet?

Sorry, nobody named Gorman has checked in yet.

Nor anybody fitting his description.

Why'd you say that?

Mr. Gorman wouldn't check in under any other name.

You gentlemen gave the description.
I assume you had some reason for doing that

Not really.

Good night.

Good night.

Evening, gents.

Well now, somebody's got the wrong room.

Nobody's got the wrong room.

We want to know what you two are doing here in Buffalo.

Just passing through.

You're a liar, you've been asking about a man named Gorman.

It's an old friend of ours.
Said he might be coming through here.

How come you're interested in him?

He's just a harmless old man looking for a place to settle.

We ain't interested in him.

You two boys we're interested in.

In us?
Uh-huh.

You want to make life easy for yourselves?

Well...
We do, yes.

least, we try to.

Well, then keep on moving out of Buffalo.
That'll make life easy.

Won't be easy if we stay?

Well, as you can see, we're deputy sheriffs.

We could throw you in jail right now.

If we wanted to make life hard on you.

Even if we haven't done anything wrong?

But you have.

You see we got a law here in the Territory of Wyoming it says

that no weapon concealed or otherwise can be carried in any town, city or village.

Oh, then most of people in this town are breaking the law.

This's right.

We can throw every mother's son of them in jail if we want to.

And in your case, we will, if you're still here tomorrow.

We won't be looking for you till after 10:00.

Fellas, I really meant it when...

when I said that, I don't want to make it hard on you boys.

Well, could you give us a little hint why we aren't welcome here?

No, we'll do better than that.

if you're not gone tomorrow.

Gentlemen.

Burk.

I swear, you find something to laugh about at your best friend's funeral.

You know, I could hardly keep from laughing right in their faces.

If they even suspect it who we really are they sure wouldn't be inviting us to move on.

It's wonderful now we know we're safe.

Safe?

What are you out of your mind?
We just got ordered out of town!

Why, it's a little mysterious, but it's not worrisome.

Oh, no?
What day is this?

April the 9th.

Yeah, what did Gorman ask us to meet him here?

The 12th.
Right again.

That gives us 3 more days before Gorman's even supposed to arrive.

That's assuming that he gets here on time.

Now, what's so wonderful about that, huh?

Kid, when we left Denver, did I know that the sun was gonna shine every doggone day?

Now, it's supposed to be blowing blizzards in this part of the country in April.

Is it my fault if it doesn't even snow, huh?

At least I managed to wipe that silly grin off your face.

Aren't you even curious to know why they want us out of town?

Curiosity's a vice.

It's one of the few I don't have

But when they look for us tomorrow, we're gonna be gone, right?

And on the 12th we're gonna sneak right back in.

I got better idea.

Sneak up to Montana.

Gorman's probably get a scheme that's not only illegal, but stupid.

He told us kid it's gonna be profitable, easy and straight.

And I don't believe it.

Prison hasn't reformed, Artie.
He's too old to reform.

Well, maybe,

but we can't let him down, Kid.

We owe him a large favor.

Remember?

That's the only reason I'm here.

Sure, would like to know why we ain't wanted in Buffalo.

So, would I, Kid.

I sure hope we never find out.

I got no bother

I got no sister

No sister and no brother

To ride the range with me

Oh, I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

And a long, long way from home

Come on, ding-a-ling.

I ain't got no father

I ain't got no mother

No father and no mother

Take good care for me

Kid, now I know why there's a reward out on you dead or alive.

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

And a long, long way from home

Kid, one more chorus to that

and I'm gonna turn you in myself.

I ain't got no sister

I got no brother

I ain't got no sister

No sister or no brother

Take good care of me.

I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

You gonna fear for a lonesome cowboy, if you don't shut up.

Oh, I'm a poor lonesome cowboy.
I'm a poor lone...

Dear Lord...
I'm a poor lonesome cowboy

Hey, kid.

Huh?

Look kid, do you want to earn 50 cents?

How?

Go over to the hotel and find out
if a man named Artie Gorman is registered.

Just ask if Mr. Gorman's in, and come back and give us an answer.

And we'll give you this.

Artie who?
Gorman.

Hold it.

You want to try?

Well...?

Well, where's my 50 cents?

The clerk at the desk said,

tell the two gentlemen

neither Mr. Gorman and nobody else by that description is checked in yet.

Thanks.

You know, Heyes it's like you said

if those deputies knew who we were they wouldn't be telling us to leave town.

Now I'm hungry, I'm tired, I'm sleepy and I need a bath.

I'm gonna go over to that hotel and register and take care of all 4 of those problems

and I'm gonna stay there till Artie comes.

All right, Kid.

If anything happens,

I mean if we get in any trouble,

it's your fault.

Heyes, I knew you'd find a way to make this whole trip my fault.

Well, didn't you get my message?

We did.
Now we'd like a room.

Will the same one do?

Just fine.

Unless you've got one that doesn't fit the local deputies? passkeys.

Thank you.

Here they come, all smooshed up for supper.

Mr. Smith.

Mr. Jones.

I hope you fellas are not gonna take this too hard and go and do something foolish,

but you're both under arrest.

Why?

Well, you are wearing guns.

So is a whole town.

What you got against us anyway?

That'll all be explained to you at the jailhouse.

You want to come peaceful?

Look,

we just came back here to see if a friend of ours had arrived and he hasn't.

So in the morning, we'll be on our way and we won't be coming back.

Say,

do you mind telling that to my partner?

At the jailhouse.

You gonna insist on it?

Like I said fellas, you're both under arrest.

Jail is right over yonder.

I tried being reasonable. It didn't work.

Maybe this will.

Sheridan is due north, Gilette his due east.
Just don't return again to Buffalo.

Who you talking to?

Nobody, I was reading.

I found this nice little note tucked under your vest.

It says, don't come back to Buffalo.

You know, Kid,

I don't think they like us in that town.

Well, that's too bad 'cause that's right where I'm going.

Are you crazy?

You can't go in there alone.

Well, I can't ask you to go with me.
You ain't crazy, I am.

I just can't stand that people beat me till I ache all over not do anything about it.

So I'm going back there I'm gonna do two things: first of all

I'm gonna put twice as many bruises on that deputy with the mustaches he put on me

and then I'm gonna make him tell me why we're not welcome in Buffalo!

I'll meet you up in Sheridan.

Hey, hold it.
Stop right there.

Yeah?
What for?

'Cause I'm coming with you.

Why?

Well, this is something I was hoping I'd never have to tell you, Kid,

but I'm as crazy as you are.

All right, now you're gonna tell us why.

Why what?

What Buffalo's got against two poor harmless out-of-work cow hands.

I don't know.

Yes, you're doing.
You're gonna tell us, right?

I can't tell you anything.
I'd be in terrible trouble, if I did.

In case you haven't noticed, you're in terrible trouble right now.

You're also running out of time.

Will you take that gun out of my face?

I will, when you answer the question.

I'll tell you, but you put that gun down.

And I'll make a deal with you.

Tell me the deal first.

I'll tell you what you want to know,

but you gotta forget where you heard it from.

All right, you got yourself a deal.

Our boss ordered us

to get you two out of Buffalo, fast.

Did he tell you to work us over, too?

Well, no.

He was sore about that,

but we explained to him that you fellas came back here

and that talking wasn't gonna do the job.

And your boss is the Johnson County Sheriff, huh?

That's right, Frank Canton.

But if you tell him, I told you, he'd like to kill me.

Nobody move.

Just freeze right we are.

Orville, I never been so glad to see anybody in my whole life.

Now, will you tell 'em to drop that gun?

Just uncock that gun and drop in the sawdust.

Mr. Smith,

you take off your gun belt, too.

What are we gonna do with him now, Orville?

I gonna do just what I was told to do.

Gonna take him to the jailhouse.

The jailhouse?
That's right.

I see 'em riding up Laurel, I went and told Frank.

He says bring 'em on in.
He wants to see 'em.

We made a deal, mister.

You better live up to it or you're gonna have to deal with me.

It'd be a real pleasure to deal with you.

But I gave you my word, I'll keep it.

Who knows, we may need you.

But you better work on your partner there.

He didn't promise you a thing.

Come on out this door.

Straight ahead.

Where's Sheriff Canton?

He'll be here soon enough.

He's across the street have a cup of coffee.

Joe?

Joe Horner?

Hello, Heyes.

Hello, Kid.

Joe, what are you doing 2,000 miles away from home?

Not that we aren't awful glad to see you, Joe.

Joe Horner!
Come on out.

You fellas want to put your guns back on?

No need to ask.

No indeed.
Frank Canton will be here in any minute.

He already is.

You're looking at him.

Huh?
Looking at him?

Isn't anybody in this whole territory that don't know me by the name of Frank Canton.

Excepting for you two.

It was you,
that wanted us out of town?

See fellas, look, I'm...uh...
I'm a very popular man in Johnson County.

I was elected to this office.

Well, some of the biggest people in this whole territory are close personal friends of mine.

Even the Stockgrower's Association.
They want to make me chief of detectives.

In other words

things are going real good for me around here now.

Sure are.

And we couldn't be happier.

Then of course you come riding into town, looking like he might want to stay a spell.

You see, that gives me a choice.

Whether to go up to your hotel room and talk to you, and say

you know, when you see me walking down the street don't say 'hi Joe'.

Because I'm not Joe Horner anymore.

I'm Frank Canton.

And don't ever...

don't ever mention the state of Texas,

or...

or I get a couple of my deputies, that just kind of...

ease you out of town.

Sure, we should have took that first choice, Joe.

Yeah, so do I now.

I don't know, I figured of all people

West of the Big Muddy you two will take the hint

and not come back into Buffalo anymore.

I guess, I forgot how mule stubborn you two.

Why'd you change your name?

You weren't any trouble when you rode with us in Texas.

No more than I'm in trouble now, serious trouble.

Look, who is this Artie Gorman in here?

He's just an old friend.

He was in prison in Utah and asked us to meet him up here.

Why?

Well, we don't exactly know.

Probably needed a helping hand.
We owe it to him.

Oh, I see.

He just checked in over the hotel about three hours ago.

Listen, do me a favor, will you fellas?

Sure, Joe.

Maybe you better make it two favors.

One don't call me Joe anymore.
Every time you do it makes me jump.

And the other one is this friend of yours.

Make sure he doesn't get himself, or you two boys either,

in trouble, will you?
As long as you in my County.

Will you promise to do that, as a personal favor to me, please?

Don't you worry...
Frank.

You may not believe this, but the Kid in me have gone straight.

Well, I believe it, all right.

I even heard a rumor about it.

But you still want us out of town, huh?

I'll tell you, it ain't easy on me,

having Kid Curry and Hannibal Heyes sitting here in my lap.

And since I can't...

well, since I won't arrest you,

I mean...maybe it'd be a good thing when

you ought to move on in the day or so, huh?

Sooner than that.

But how about us going over the saloon heaviness a nice drink together, huh?

Talk about old times.

Nah, I'm sorry fellas, I can't risk it.
I got too much to lose here.

Well, so long, Joe.

I'm sorry,

I meant, Frank.

So long, Kid.

Good luck to you.
Good luck to you, boys.

Now look, stay out of trouble, will you?

Say if Governor Warren is one of those big friends you mentioned,

put in a word for us, would you?
A word?

He'll know what you mean.

If you know him well enough, he might even explain it to you.

Well, I have news for you.

Just tell us what room he's in, huh?

Well, since he had no luggage

and no money I put him in your room.

And may I say that he in no way fits the description you gave me!

Now, Heyes, take a look at what prison does to men.

Yeah, we can't overlooked that when we described him, didn't we?

Ah, we sure did.

Artie.

Artie.

Wait a minute.

Hey.

We didn't think you're ever gonna show up.

Artie, you old thief, you look like the north end of a chicken heading south.

?You fellas are a cure for anything that ails me.

Say, I've been looking all over this room for some whiskey.

You fellas got any whiskey?

Not a drop.

Now, please fellas,

I got something to tell you, that's gonna make you dance up the walls,

but I gotta cut through the dust before I can get it out.

I'll get us a bottle.

Yeah, Kid, you looking all right.

Put on a little weight, but that's okay.

And you should talk.

It's lucky there's no thing as bad whiskey.

'Cause if there was this is sure be it.

Well, now that you cut the dust, Artie,

let's see if you can come up with an excuse

for bringing us all the way to Buffalo Wyoming.

An excuse?

Listen, Heyes, you'll be thanking me to your dying day.

Well, that's what worries me.

Come on, Artie, all we know so far is you said it's not illegal or dangerous,

which usually means what you're talking about is illegal and dangerous.

Not this time.

You remember Jack Cheseboro?

No.

You mean, you don't remember me telling you about old Monterey Jack?

No, Artie.

Well, he died.

They let him out of jail

and he was dead five weeks later.

Couldn't stand the freedom.

Artie, will you get to the point?

That it: Jack and me stole $80,000 from a bank in North Platte years ago.

We was on the run so we buried it.

13 miles south of here.

And then we're working our way throughout the West without the money

broken into a general store in Utah and were caught.

Artie, you're scaring me.
Would you get to the point?

I think he already has.

I sure have.

As soon as Jack got out, he come back up here to dig up that loot.

And, I'll be dogged if some rancher hadn't gone and

built an ice house right on the spot where we buried our $80,000.

You know, Jack he came into the pen to see me, figure out something to do.

Then he turned sick, and in 9 days he was dead.

And you want us to help you get your $80,000 back.

That's right, plumb in the middle of that ranch.

Now, you're a smart fella, Heyes, you can figure out some way to dig that out.

And I'll split it right down the middle, with you and the Kid.

And that's not dangerous?

Not for you two.

And that's not illegal?

No siree, the statute of limitations ran out on that crime years ago.

Well, I could stand up here

and tell the whole world I stole that money and nothing would happen.

I know one thing for sure would happen, they'd take the money away from you.

Well, I'm not about to stand up here and make an announcement to everybody.

What's gotten into you two?

Nobody knows that money is buried there.

I'm not gonna go to jail 'cause I stole it,

and you're not gonna go to jail for digging it up.

Isn't that right?

Right.
Right.

Well, what's the matter with you fellas?

Like we told you, Artie, we're trying to go straight.

We're making it with no help from old buddies like you

But I'm not trying to make you go crooked!

It's no crime to dig up that money.

True. The crime begins when we try to start using it.

But that statute has run out.

Look, Kid, would anybody be chasing us?

No.

Will there be a hue?
No.

A crime?
No.

Any stories about the robbing in the paper?
No!

Then why are you fellas give me so much trouble?

Heyes, would you explain it to him?

Artie, it wouldn't be honest to keep it.

Did I hear you right?

Did you really use the word honest?

What's got into you guys?

You're gonna got religious or something?

No, Artie, not exactly.

We're just trying to act like ordinary honest citizens.

And you don't need $40,000, so you're just gonna leave it there.

Well, let me tell you something and you owe me this.

If I hadn't come across you boys when you were 16,

neither one of you would have made it till 17.

Well, I'm here now.

And if you don't help me, I'm gonna have to find somebody else who will help me.

Who'll probably try and cut me out,

probably cut my throat.

Are you gonna say no to your oldest friend?

Not only old, but part and broke?

Artie,

you take this

and go on downstairs and get yourself a room.

The Kid and me want to talk about it.

Nah, well, I'll be back.

Kind of hard to argue with, ain't he?

Yeah,

And I guess he's right.

At least he can't be arrested for using the money,

maybe nobody can.

All right, 40,000 dollars...

with that kind of money, we could live in Paris, Rome...

The statute of limitations would run out on our crimes

long before we ever ran out of money.

Yeah.

What could go wrong, Heyes?

Kid, I've been asking myself that same question.

What could go wrong?

If we don't help him get the money, somebody's gonna do it.

You know, he's right. They'll probably take the money and maybe even kill him.

And you've got to admit Heyes, we owe him a whole lot more than he's ever asked of us.

At least we can help him do is find the money.

Then we can figure out what to do with our share.

Will you're gonna help me

or are you gonna treat me like an old nobody who you owe nothing to.

We're gonna help you, Artie,

at least we're gonna help you dig it up.

Hey, that's great, now, you're talking!

Hey, haven't you got any whiskey up here?

No more whiskey, Artie.

Come on, sit down, we got some thinking to do.

Hey, you know that's right.
Maybe we could use a little more help.

That ice house is right in the middle of the ranch.

Maybe three guns is not enough.

We don't need any help and we don't need any guns.

We'll have the money for you tomorrow afternoon.

All we need's the time to dig it up.

Heyes, you don't understand.

The barn is there,
the ranch house is there

and that ice house is right in the middle of everything.

How deep's the money buried?

2 - 3 feet.

The whole job will be done in one half-hour.

How?

Hey,

start rining that gong!

Get going!
Ring it, ring it, bang that thing.

Everybody outta here!

Come on out there, I got an important announcement to make.

This is an order.

Come out, fellas.

All right now, you listen close you fellas, 'cause I'm only gonna say this once.

Sheriff Canton's got Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry all over the KC.

And he wants everybody down there to help him out.

And he's gonna split the reward with everybody who shows up, so let's go.

All right boys, get into that barn.

Get those shovels out.

Git over there.

Come on, hurry it up!

Well, boys, start digging.

Now, I worked the line crew up out of Denver once.

An old man up there taught me the secret of this.

What's that?
Just keep digging.

It's a little hard.
Just keep digging.

Watch out for the foot there, boy.

Can't you dig any faster, Kid?

It's all yours, Kid.

Well, come on fellas, we haven't got all day! Let's dig, dig!

Come out!

Pull out.

Hey, that's it!
That's it!

You've done it, boys, you've done it!

That's my money!

Oh no, it ain't.

One at a time you drop your guns.

One finger and a thumb.

You first, Smith.

Now you.

All right old timer.

And you go get Jones's gun and you throw it right out here.

Real cautious.

All right, now all of you
over here and in the barn.

And bring that bag.

Well, Thaddeus, I guess we'll never know what we woulda done next.

I know, what I'd like to do next.

Come on inside.

You two sit down here.

Tie 'em up.

And do it right.

I was dead right, Orv.

It's money.
Lots of it.

I'll now count it.
We haven't got time for that.

Oh, sure we do.

They can't get out of here, they're all tied up anyhow.

You two boys doing this in the line of duty or just sorta on your own?

Shut up, both of you.
Just keep shut.

Snap it up.

You do it good.
I'm gonna check every knot.

How much?

Ssshh.

You can move faster than that old man.

I'm going as fast as I can go.

I got a bad back.

You're gonna have worse than that.

My knees ain't so good either.

Now right they're tied.

Sit down right over there.

All right, all you gotta do is ask.

That's tight enough!

Move over.
All right.

Orv, there's over $80,000 in here.

Sure?
Sure, I'm sure.

Let's get out of here.
Orv, wait!

We got us a fortune in here.

Except for those three no-good drifters

nobody knows we have it.

We ain't killing nobody!

I don't mind taking this money and running for it,

as long as I don't kill nobody.

They're still gonna be there when those cow hands get back.

Well, it's stupid just leaving 'em here.

No, it's not!

What are they gonna do?

They're gonna say we ran off with $80,000?

They can't do that without admitting they stole it in the first place.

Now, so long as they don't say nothing,

they ain't no trouble.

Get outta here.

C'mon.

Artie did you really have to do this good a job?

You heard him say he was gonna check every knot, didn't ya?

Hey, who were those fellas anyhow?

Deputy sheriffs.

I should say former deputy sheriffs.

You should say rich former deputy sheriffs.

Not for long if I can help it.

I'll be happy if we can just get out of here before that crowd gets back.

They'll be saddle sore and slaying mad.

And it won't take 'em that long to put Artie's story together with us.

We should have Artie tell 'em it was Bill Longley and Wes Hardin cold up at the KC.

Kid, the Union Pacific Railroad is not putting money up on Hardin and Longley.

No, they went after that $20,000 not glory.

Hey, hey, fellas!

Look!

Go on.

The thing about you, Artie, when you tie a knot you tie it good.

Shut up.

Give they got a two-hour lead on us,

they probably already reached the railroad by now.

So, what are we doing?

Oh, will you shut up, Heyes.
At least we're going in the right direction

out of Wyoming.

Dead.

Look at here.

Well, I guess Orville got out a shot, too.

The other one's wounded.

Kid, it must have been the horse that got a hit.

If it'd been a man, he had'd dropped by now.

Yeah, I know it was a horse.

You can tell it by the way the drops are spaced.

We should have a pretty good chance now, shouldn't we?

Yeah, a pretty good chance Artie.

God chance of getting ourselves killed.

On foot, he's gonna be tired and a little desperate,

he may just decide to wait out there for us.

Well, if you want to be cautious that's up to you, but I want my money.

Boys,

come on you fellas promised me something.

I want you to stay right here.

Artie, keep down!

Artie, get back here!

Heyes, I wanna move closer.
Cover me!

Kid, he's been hit again.

Easy, easy does it.

Kid, he's hurt bad.

We can't be too far from Gillette.

I'm going in and get a wagon,

see if I can find a doctor.

Artie, Artie...

why'd you have to go and do that, huh?

Anyone gonna get away from us.

You know, Kid,

I spent so many years

just thinking about that money.

Just thinking,

thinking,

and he had it!

Heyes,

you don't have to go anywhere.

Still thinking?

No,

just brooding.

And I already know what we got to do.

Wait a minute, don't tell me, I want to guess.

We're gonna taking the money,

and Artie and the two deputies

and go back to Buffalo.

That's right.

Well, we could take the money and run,

but then we'd be wanted for murder.

Killing a couple of deputies, no less.

And we'd really be on the jump for the rest of our lives.

Which no doubt would be very short.

Well, you think telling Joe our - I mean Frank Canton -

our story, you think that'll do it for us?

Oh, yeah.

As long as we turn the money in with it, I'm sure that,

he'll let us ride out of town.

Be glad to see us go.

Yeah.

Remember back in Buffalo one of us said 'what could go wrong'?

You remember that?

Yeah, I remember.

Which one of us said that?

Both of us, Kid.

Both of us.

So, we thought it over a few hours and decided to do...

well, what we done.

And you boys been telling me you're trying to go straight, huh?

But Joe, we never got past digging it up.

In our minds,

digging it up certainly 's not a criminal act.

Who knows what we would have done after that?

In any case, we never got a chance to find out,

except, that here it is.

We've turned it down every last cent of it.

Now, you're feeling pretty stupid about the whole business, aren't you?

Not just stupid.

We wouldn't mind so much, if stupid was all we felt.

Well, boys, I'll tell you what I wanna do.

I'm gonna let you ride out of here, now.

Today.

It's not because I believe your story either,

or because I believe you're trying to go straight.

It's because neither one of you can remember my name isn't Joe.

Thanks, Joe.

And listen, you can even take the money with you if you want.

What?

You mean, you didn't even look at it?

Well, here...

that money's issued by the Bank of North Platte.

It went broke.

This money haven?t been worth a dime for years.

Good luck, Frank.

I see you.

Thank you.

You boys,

listen,

stay out of trouble, will you?

Sure.

I am the resurrection and the life, says the Lord.

He that believeth in me though he were dead,

yet shall he live.

And whosoever liveth and believeth in me,

shall never die.

We brought nothing into this world and

it is certain we carry nothing out.

The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

Gentlemen, I want to thank you for coming here today.

No man should pass on into the unknown, without someone to wish him well.

It was our friend.

Well, then perhaps you know

what was in that old canvas sack that was placed in the coffin with him?

It wasn't anything much, Reverend.

Like you said,

he brought nothing into this world.

And it's certain we carry nothing out.

Job chapter 1 verse 21

You two boys have a real attachment to the town of Buffalo, don't you?

Well, Joe I'll tell you, we got about

ten miles past Fort McKinney when we decided we had to come back.

Yeah, Joe, we just couldn't let him be buried without

somebody around to say goodbye.

Yeah.
Yeah, that's the way I felt.

It's how come I'm here.

Of course, I didn't expect to find anyone else around, you know.

Yeah, we're sorry about that, Joe.
We're gonna be moving on now.

Thanks a lot for letting him take it with him.

Listen boys, I'm gonna be heading over to Cheyenne next week.

Suppose I just happen to mention to Governor Warren that two

good, honest men came passing by here by the name of

Thaddeus Jones and Joshua Smith.

You suppose that might mean something to him?

It sure would.

And it just might help.

How?

Well, we can't say sheriff, but we'd be much obliged.

All right.

You boys stay out of trouble now, you hear?

Take it easy.
Seeing you, Joe.

Heyes,

what do you call the kind of question you ask

when it doesn't matter what the answer is?

A stupid question.

Oh, come on, be serious.

I think, you're referring to a hypothetical question, Kid.

and I take it you're about to ask me one.

It's a matter of fact, yes.

Let's say that nobody got killed,

and we made off with our share of the money.

Now if it happened like that,

would we have turned the money in?

Yeah, that's not only hypothetical, it's unfair.

Maybe so, but it's worth thinking about.

All right, what do you think we'd have done?

Well, since we didn't have to face that situation

I've decided we would have done the noble thing.

You mean keep?

Now, is that what you call a hypothetical answer?

Of course, Kid, I always answer a hypothetical question with a hypothetical answer.

And I agree.

Does that mean, you think we'd have really kept the money?

Maybe it does.

Then again, maybe don't.