Alias Smith and Jones (1971–1973): Season 2, Episode 21 - Don't Get Mad, Get Even - full transcript
Heyes is cheated at poker by big, obnoxious Wheelwright. Georgette Sinclair, in the second of three appearances, is hired to help Heyes carry out the title phrase, which Heyes utters while leaving. "Wheelwrong" also cheats George and gives her a literal horselaugh when she tries to bewitch him with a string of pearls. The group goes to Silky O'Sullivan, who lent them the necklace to begin with, and after enduring his rage talk him into lending them money to "ransom" the necklace.
Throw these two out.
Don't ever let them back in.
All right, on your feet.
You try throwing us out of here, someone's liable to get hurt.
I really don't think Mr. Wheelwrong wants that.
You talk real tough.
Mr. Wheelwright said to throw you out,
that's what we gotta do.
Well now, gentlemen, I think you'd be smart just to
step back.
We're willing and able to
walk out without any help at all.
Sorry, you ain't do that.
And I hope you don't try for your guns, because
Mr. Wheelwright didn't say to kill ya, he just said throw you out.
Fellas, if you'd just step aside,
nobody will get killed.
Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry
The two most successful outlaws
in the history of the West
and in all the trains and banks
they robbed they never shot anyone.
This made our two
Kansas cousins very popular
with everyone
but the railroads and the banks.
One thing
we gotta get, Heyes.
What's that?
Out of this business.
The governor can't come flat out
and give you amnesty now
first you gotta prove you deserve it.
Lom, are you saying that all
we've got to do is stay out of trouble
until the governor figures
that we deserve amnesty?
And in the meantime
we'll still be wanted?
Well, that's true
until then only you me and
the governor will know about it.
It'll be our secret.
That's a good deal?
I sure wish the governor let
a few more people in our secret.
Heyes, I almost hate to go in there.
What if you're wrong?
What if we really don't have $15,000 worth?
Kid, I said a $15,000 at minimum.
We probably got us $18,000 worth.
Come on.
$15,000 minimum...
Why do I listen? Why?
How can I know our scale was off?
Anyway, what's so awful about the $8,000?
It's not exactly Irish wages.
I wish you'd stop making cracks about the Irish!
Our grandfather was Irish.
You didn't answer the question.
Our plan won't work if all we've got is $8,000.
That's what's so awful about $8,000.
You're right.
We can't go to Bolivia with only $8,000 it's not enough.
All right, what's the plan now?
We double the 8,000.
How?
How?
Do I have to come up with all the answers?
Kid, I got it.
Heyes,
may I remind you of times past when you said those very words with
results I'd rather not even bring up at this time.
Remember Wheelwright?s Palace in Centralia?
What about Wheelwright?s Palace in Centralia?
Remember the poker game with $1,000 buy-in?
Oh, the one you wanted to get into by selling the horses, burros, saddles and equipment?
Yeah, that's the one.
I remember it.
Kid, I could do it.
They play terrible poker there, I could double our money.
You could also undouble our money.
Now, you know that I never lose at poker.
The other players really understand the game - I quit.
Those guys at Wheelwrights don't understand the game.
I've watched them.
All right,
I'll admit,
if the game isn't crooked you can't lose.
It's probably crooked.
Well, that's when I really win.
There is no way to cheat at poker that I can't spot
like that!
And take full advantage of it.
All right,
maybe it's a good idea.
Yeah.
Except for one thing.
It doesn't leave me anything to do.
Well, sure it does.
You stay here and sell our horses, burros, saddles and equipment.
I'm out.
I call.
I call.
I'm out.
Pass.
Aces and queens.
Three jacks.
Ah, another nice pot.
Ante up, gentlemen.
Get your money in there.
There we go.
It?s about time I got one of those hands.
Just about your turn.
Ante up, fellas.
My hand, right?
Pass.
Pass.
Open for 50.
Too steep for me.
I'm out.
Fold.
I'm in.
I call.
Out.
Cards, gentlemen?
Three.
Take one.
Three.
Opening bet's 100.
Well sir, if you compare, I'll raise you.
Make it an even 1,000.
I'm out.
I call the 1,000
and raise you 2,000.
Well, that is mighty strong.
I don't think it's strong enough.
Call your 2.
Now, let's see where the strength really is.
Up $5000.
Now, if you'd only drawn one card I just call.
But since you drew three,
I'll call 5,000.
I think, I'll raise you what I've got in front of me here.
There's 4,000 back at you Mr. Wheelwright.
Since the table stakes rule forces me to just call you,
Here's your 4,000.
Show your hand, you're called.
Four kings.
Well, now that is a mighty strong hand,
but not quite strong enough.
Four aces.
Sheesh, that's something.
You had a pair of aces and refused to open?
Well, I was under the gun,
so I decided to take a little risk.
But maybe I just read your face.
Nobody reads my face, Mr. Wheelwright.
Unless I want him to.
You don't pass the open with a pair of aces, not in a game like this.
Really?
I just did.
That paid handsomely.
Aren't going away mad, are you?
No, Mr. Wheelwright.
No, I had a grandfather
who was born in Kilkenny.
They've got an old saying there:
Don't get mad,
get even.
218, please.
Don't you have your key?
You know I left it here.
You sure?
It's not in the box.
It's my mistake. I've got it right here.
Good night.
Good night.
I learned a few tricks from you, Joshua.
Your key's over there on the dresser.
Well, how we doing?
Heyes,
how we doin'?
I'm broke flat.
The money you got for the burros, horses and equipment
that's what we got.
You are broke?
A man who can't lose at poker is broke?
The man who quits when other players know what they're doing is broke!?
$4,000 I was ahead $4,000.
And then suddenly they made a switch.
Brought in a mechanic.
May I quote:
There's no way to cheat at poker that I can't spot like that.
Don't stop now.
All right, how'd it happen?
I guess, Wheelwright decided here I was
a stranger in town about to take away a lot of homegrown money
so he brought in an artist.
I mean a real artist.
Hands like Paganini and twice as talented.
He must have pawned the whole deck after the cut and then dealt from the stack
when I didn't see it.
I didn't even get a hint of it.
You think the game was crooked just for one hand?
Wheelwright knew that that was all he could get away with, it was all he
was all he needed.
Boy, they sent me up like real masters.
Wheelwright checked with aces, I opened with a pair of kings,
he stayed, drew three cards, I drew the ones I was supposed to, two more kings,
They knew I'd figure Wheelwright for anything but aces.
He'd have opened if he'd had aces.
It was beautiful.
I had to figure I had a lock on the game,
so I bet it that way.
Well,
as grandpa Curry used to say:
You show me a poor man and I'll show you a man who ain't got any money.
Well, we're gonna get it back.
The whole 12,000.
How?
I'm working on it.
You're working on it?
Heyes, if anything happens to Wheelwright - anything -
you're the man they're gonna be looking for.
Kid, I didn't say I was gonna steal it, I said we're gonna get it back.
And I said how?
I haven't got the foggiest idea.
But there's got to be a way.
Kid, the fog is cleared.
I think I know a way.
We begin by you going to Denver and finding Georgette.
I go to Denver?
Why don't you go to Denver?
Because I've got to go to San Francisco to see Silky.
He's got something I have to borrow.
By something you mean money?
No,
no, it's kind of a
weapon.
Miss Charlotte Brandon.
Mr. Chauncey Gaylord Brandon.
My sister and I would like adjoining suites, please.
Of course, Mr. Brandon.
How long do you plan on staying?
Perhaps permanently.
We're here looking into investment opportunities.
Is that so?
May I recommend you to speak with Mr. Wheelwright?
Mr. who?
Wheelwright.
He owns this hotel, the feed and grain company and who knows...
May we see our accommodations now,
please?
Yes, ma'am.
George,
way you handle that room clerk
it was beautiful.
It was like the sound that one...
Now, that is timing.
Timing?
You are two days late.
I have been holed up in a loft at the livery stable.
I haven't had a shave or a bath.
I am miserable.
Timing!
Hello, Heyes, how are you?
Fine, George.
Now.
Need a nickel for a bath?
Oh, hi Kid.
Now, here it is.
Isn't that a thing of beauty, huh?
Oh yes, but
it scares me to death, Heyes.
You...
you better go over this whole thing with me.
No George, I can't. I gotta get out of here now.
I'll meet you both in Westfield.
Now...
here's the fake.
Now, don't get them mixed up.
It's a good fake.
I'll see you both in Westfield.
Heyes, nothing is gonna happen,
unless you tell me exactly how this is supposed to work - 3,000 or no 3,000.
3,000?
Well, it was 3,000 or find somebody else, and believe me there was nobody else.
3,000.
All right,
with expenses Wheelwright now owes us 15,000.
George,
sit down.
Now George, I know the kid explained it just fine,
but here's how it goes.
First, you do absolutely nothing.
We let Wheelwrong - I mean Wheelwright - make the first move.
Go get Sam,
have him take over the care of feeding these nice young ladies.
Yes sir, Mr. Wheelwright.
Please pardon my intrusion, but aren't you Miss Brandon, Mr. Brandon?
Yes sir, we are.
I'm Verle Wheelwright.
I just want to welcome you and Miss Brandon to our fair city.
Well, that's most gracious of you, sir.
May I present my sister Charlotte.
Verle Wheelwright, Charlotte.
How do you do.
Charmed.
I see you are having coffee.
May I order a brandy for you?
Well now only if you?ll enjoy it with us.
I'd be delighted.
Brandy, the best.
So even before he died,
our father convinced us that the West was the place to invest our inheritance.
In his will he mentioned several places he felt promising and in this area is one of them.
He was entirely correct in both his conclusions.
I'd like to offer a toast.
To your success,
may it be swift and sure.
Mr. Wheelwright, your sense of humor will put Mr. Twain himself to shame.
I know him.
I met him when he was a struggling young reporter.
And he isn't funny at all at a dinner table.
But of course, I'm not funny when I get a pen in my hand.
Oh, oh my goodness, my pearls!
Oh, what a shame.
Quickly.
There, here are some.
Chauncey you just hand them to me.
I'll put them...
Yes, sister dear.
There's one over there.
That looks like about all.
...seven.
Ah,
48, 49, 50.
Oh, thank goodness, they're all here.
Mr. Wheelwright,
may I ask you a great favor?
Of course.
You surely know the
the best jeweler in town not to mention the most honest one.
Could you have these restrung for me?
I'll pay for them, of course.
Oh no, you won't, young lady.
After all it was my joke you're laughing at when they broke.
Oh, you're very kind.
There you are, Mr. Wheelwright.
I hope you know,
this is not just the necklace,
this
is a work
of arts.
How much would you say this is worth, Otto, in cold cash?
$50,000 at least.
You're sure?
Absolutely.
Those are the most beautifully matched pearls.
I would give $40,000 for the necklace myself.
Sorry, Otto,
it's not for sale.
Oh, thank you very much, Mr. Wheelwright.
Who is it?
Verle Wheelwright, Miss Brandon.
Oh, just a minute.
I have your necklace, may I come in?
I can see there's something troubling you.
May I ask what it is?
My brother and I are leaving for Atlanta on the next stagecoach.
But...
but why?
I was supposed to receive a large sum of money this morning and
instead I received a telegram
saying that our estate was being challenged by some
Yankee nephew of my father.
Our money is being held up by the bank.
We have to go home and fight this thing.
I'm truly sorry to hear all this.
I have your necklace here.
Good as new.
Thank you, Mr. Wheelwright.
Is there anything I can do?
Oh, no, no, but I...I do thank you for offering.
We'll win, and we'll be back I promise you that.
You know, it takes money to fight court battles.
I'll borrow it.
Mr. Wheelwright,
did your jeweler
mention anything about my
necklace.
He admired it very much.
Did he happen to say anything about its value?
Yes, he did happen to mention that
he'd be willing to pay $40,000 for it.
himself.
It's worth much more than that!
Oh, I'm sure it is.
Mr. Wheelwright,
would you be willing to take my necklace as collateral
and lend me at interest of course
uh...say $15,000?
Miss Brandon,
I was about to suggest that very thing myself.
Can we arrange it immediately?
We certainly can.
There.
Well, I wish all business dealings could be handled so well
and so quickly.
It isn't over yet.
There's the matter of the money.
5,000 10,000 $15,000.
Thank you. And now I have one more favor to ask.
May I see where my necklace will be kept?
I mean it once belonged to my grandmother,
Charlotte Jefferson Beauregard and I
well I treasure it.
Miss Brandon, you just come with me.
They're safer here than in any bank vault you could name.
Banks are dark and empty at night,
thieves can sneak in and blow their safes.
This casino never closes, that's why it's never been robbed.
They'll be safer here than it's ever been before.
Miss Br...
may call you Charlotte?
Only if I may call you Verle.
Now, Charlotte,
if I can help you in any way at all you just telegraph me.
Mr. Wheelwright.
Mr. Bran...
you know I feel very strange calling your sister by her first name but not you.
May I?
Of course, Mr. Wheelwright. It's Chauncey, it's Chauncey Beauregard Brandon.
Now remember, Chauncey,
you can always count on Verle Wheelwright, if the need arises.
All right, folks let's go.
We're ten minutes late already.
Good luck, Chauncey.
Why, thank you, Verle.
Charlotte.
Yes.
Put up a good fight.
We certainly will,
and thank you, Verle.
Go wake Fanny up, tell her to get dressed in the gladdest rags she?s got.
Right away, Mr. Wheelwright.
For the life of me, I'll never figure out why you and Heyes went straight.
You can get rich doing things like that.
George, what's happening to you?
You're the one that used to give Heyes and me lectures on honestness.
Well, if all people are as miserable and evil as Wheelwrong,
I don't see anything wrong with stealing from them.
Yeah.
The jails are full of people that said things just like that.
Oh, oh...
What's the matter?
You told him your name is Chauncey Beauregard Brandon.
Well, why not?
I kind of took a liking to dear old grandma Beauregard.
But that isn't how you signed the register.
It isn't?
No, you signed it Chauncey Gaylord Brandon.
Well, who reads all hotel registers anyway?
Verle Wheelwrong might.
George,
how'd you do, huh?
Are you still scared?
Oh let go, I can't breathe.
Just kiss me.
It went so smoothly I don't believe it.
Great.
Where's the money?
In my pocket.
Why?
'Cause we got to put it in the bank.
I thought we were going to San Francisco
We are. The northbound stage leaves tomorrow and meets up with the train at Waterford.
Then why put our money in the bank here?
'Cause those banks have a business called transfer of funds.
Our money's gonna be waiting for us in San Francisco safe and sound.
I sure wish we could do that with the you-know-what.
We'll do the next best thing with a you-know-what.
What?
We'll guard it with your life.
Forgive me, Mr. Wheelwright,
but I saw the pearls from my table.
Did you purchase them?
Not exactly although you might say I took a lien on 'em.
I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up owning 'em.
Oh, wonderful.
Those are the loveliest...
Mr. Fielder, what do you think you're doing?
It's all right, Miss Turpin.
I was examining the pearls, not you.
There's something wrong.
Huh?
Excuse me, Miss Turpin.
Just one moment, please.
I don't understand.
No.
No, those are not the pearls you brought me.
In fact, they're not even pearls.
Otto,
you're trying to fox me or something?
Mr. Wheelwright,
I'm an honest man, you know.
This is a paste duplicate of the necklace you brought me.
Absolutely worthless.
Can you prove that?
Yes, come to my shop and I do just so.
Please, excuse me.
I stay.
You shoulda hit, Kid.
Hit a 15 when she?s got a 4 showing?
Well, sure there's only one face card left in the deck,
no tens, no eights, only one nine,
the odds were with you all the way.
Heyes, don't you ever let that mind of yours rest?
No, I'm not smart enough to be lazy....
like you.
I think he was trying to compliment you.
Come on out of there, there?s four shotguns on ya.
Get out of there fast or we'll blast that coach.
Come on, get outta there!
Hurry up!
Up!
Up!
Up.
Hey, boys, look at what I found.
Let's get out of here.
Folks, I'm sorry about this.
First hold up on this line in 3 years.
Lose anything of value?
No, no, no, no...
just a $50,000 pearl necklace.
A $50,000 what?
I thought we were guarding it with your life.
No, Heyes thought we were guarding it with my life.
You'd get the feeling they knew what they were looking for?
Feeling...
I know they knew what they were looking for.
Which tells us who's behind it, right?
Who?
Wheelwrong.
He must have got suspicious and checked the necklace.
Nah,
no, George handled him fine, he couldn't got suspicious.
Probably he just took the necklace out and hung it onone of his women
and somebody took a good look at it.
Do you really think Wheelwrong, I mean Wheeleright's got it?
What are you gonna tell Silky?
Silky?
Why, I'm not worried about Silky.
Silky O'Sullivan has the warmest heart of any man I ever knew.
You haven't got it?
You let somebody steal it?
I don't believe it!
You wouldn't dare come back here if that had happened.
Hey, you're joking, aren't you?
My necklace isn't really lost at all, is it?
Because if it is
I think I'll kill you.
Answer me, Heyes!
Well, now Silky it's not exactly lost.
We know who's got it.
And don't you worry, Silky,
we're gonna get it back for you.
How?
Well, we start by borrowing some money,
say $15,000?
Heyes, why do you keep saying we?
Charlotte,
or I may I call you Miss Brandon?
You're back much sooner than I expected.
Could we speak alone, Mr. Wheelwr...wright.
Why not?
Thank you.
Mr. Wheelwright,
I want to make this perfectly clear:
I tried to swindle you.
Is that so?
Yes.
You aren't being candid Mr. Wheelwrong...wright,
you know I tried to swindle you.
But I was forced into it.
That is so?
Yes.
By my scheming brother Chauncey.
He's dominating me since we were children.
I did inherit that necklace from my grandmother Charlotte Beauregard.
And my brother saw a way to use it for gain.
He was finally able to coerce me into doing what we did.
Is that so?
Yes.
I'm throwing myself upon your mercy, Verle.
And I'm deeply ashamed.
I want to undo what I did.
I want to give you back your $15,000 and I have it right here.
Miss Brandon,
I'll be candid with you, truly candid.
You did try to swindle me,
since I didn't exactly come down with yesterday's rain you didn't get away with it.
Now having failed,
you come and offer to give me back what you took me for if I'll call it all even.
and forgotten, right?
Charlotte,
you are a charming,
pretty, young lady,
but you're not that charming,
that pretty.
The answers is no.
But...but Verle, I...
I was a victim, too...a victim of my brother's...uh...
greed and domination.
Oh, Charlotte,
I doubt if there's a man alive who could dominate you.
In any case, as I said the answer is no.
But I have the money right here
and our signed agreement.
I want to give the money back to you and have my necklace returned to me,
as per our agreement.
Little lady,
you'll give me my money I'll be happy to give you back your necklace.
The necklace you gave me to put my safe.
Otto, tells me it's worth about two or three hundred dollars.
I...I never gonna see my bother again...
he's all this doing this to me...
Oh, Charlotte,
crying doesn't do a thing for me
and it sure isn't doing anything for you.
All right,
we try Plan B - frontal assault.
And just who is involved in this
frontal assault.
All three of us.
Sorry,
plan A was little old me alone, and Plan B is you and the Kid alone.
If I had to listen to him laugh once more, I kill!
Who?
You - for getting me into this.
For getting you into this?
Yeah!
George, you named your prize and fought your way in.
Now, just wait a minute...
All right!
It's all right now, George.
You don't have to be there.
We'll handle it.
Thank you, Heyes.
Don't mention it, George.
We're saving you for Plan C.
Well, well, well...
I should have figured it all out long before now, but I didn't.
I never put you two together.
We didn't figure you would.
We'd like to talk.
I already talked
to your...sister.
Charming little thing.
She cries even better than Sarah Bernhardt herself.
But I can't stand crying.
Oh, we'd like to talk about something else.
And we seldom cry.
Well, like I you know, you can't sell that necklace, Mr. Wheelwright,
it's too well-known.
You sell it and we'll know in a matter of days
and there goes your claim my sister gave you a fake.
And she just offered to pay back the money you loaned her.
You could get yourself in serious trouble.
You fellas really want to push this?
Yup.
But you do, I'll get that string of fake pearls out
and have all three of you thrown into jail so fast you'll think it's yesterday.
Why don't we just settle this peacefully, huh, Mr. Wheelwright?
If you try and sell that necklace or even use it, we'll have you in jail just like that.
The one way you're getting money from that necklace
is to break it up and sell those pearls one at a time
and that way you'd net less than $15,000.
Now, we're willing to buy the necklace from you.
The real one.
For $15,000.
Let you off scot-free.
Not on your life.
Scot-free!?
You've still got the money you stole from me with that stacked deck.
I don't know what you're talking about.
The answer is no
like I gave the little lady.
Throw these two out.
Don't ever let them back in.
All right, on your feet.
You try throwing us out of here, someone's liable to get hurt.
I really don't think Mr. Wheelwrong wants that.
You talk real tough.
Mr. Wheelwright said to throw you out,
that's what we gotta do.
Well now, gentlemen, I think you'd be smart just to
step back.
We're willing and able to
walk out without any help at all.
Sorry, you ain't do that.
And I hope you don't try for your guns, because
Mr. Wheelwright didn't say to kill ya, he just said throw you out.
Fellas, if you'd just step aside,
nobody will get killed.
Let 'em go.
I don?t want a ruckus here in the casino
Well now,
where were we?
We were finished.
The answer was no
it still is.
Can't even steal it back.
Can't get near that safe the casino never closes.
I know,
we gotta use Plan C.
We can't,
it isn't any good.
I know, but it's all we've got.
Yeah, but it depends on split-second timing, Heyes.
Worked fine if we could rehearse it with Wheelwright,
but I don't think he'd be too cooperative.
The Kid's right.
I thought you weren't a gambler. Plan C is all gamble.
The odds aren't that bad, maybe two to one.
Those are good odds?
Kid, we've looked at worse.
With odds like that, you're willing to risk losing Silky's $15,000?
On top of the pearls?
You really want to take that chance?
I want that necklace back.
And I want our money back.
Not to mention George's 3,000.
Now George,
we can't do this without you.
You're willing to give it a try?
Well, I guess so.
Silky will come looking for you, not me.
But promise me you won't make Verle laugh.
Oh well, you're safe there George,
he doesn't find us very funny.
Miss Brandon,
I almost sent you a message refusing to see you.
I was playing poker.
But you are a woman
you really are a young and pretty one,
so here I am.
But I'll speak to you on only one condition.
What?
That you promise not to cry.
All right,
But I'd like to make a condition, too.
That you promise not to laugh.
Oh dear,
what can I do for you, Charlotte?
My friends would like to make another offer.
Oh, no, not interested.
You're not interested in selling us back the necklace for $30,000?
30,000?
Cash?
Yes.
The 15,000 we took from you and $15,000 profit.
When?
Now.
Well, well...
your friends are full of surprises.
Tell 'em meet me at my table in a half hour.
Takes me that long to close the game and get your necklace.
And thank you, Verle.
They're doing this for me and
I really do appreciate you're cooperating with them.
Brandon, gentlemen, have a seat at my desk.
Well,
a certain sum of cash money was mentioned.
Shall we start with that?
Why not?
5,000
10,000
00:42:38,609 --> 00:42:39,641
00:42:40,841 --> 00:42:41,983
00:42:45,056 --> 00:42:46,330
30,000
We're off to a good start.
Before you put that money away, Mr. Wheelwright, I'd...
I'd like to see my necklace.
That's a reasonable request.
Mr. Wheelwright,
this is not the genuine necklace.
I am shocked, Verle, that you would try to cheat me!
These are the faked pearls, that's the good one.
I do apologize, Verle.
This is the...genuine one.
See you're keeping both.
Planning to try this little game with somebody
a little stupider than I am?
Oh, no.
You've taught me a lesson I'll never forget.
You can't cheat an honest man
Verle, we want to thank you very much.
You've been more than generous.
And I want you to know we mean that sincerely.
I think so, too.
Don't get mad, get even.
Oh, dear...
Verle, bye.
Bye.
It didn't take 'em long, did it?
It's untraceable here, Mr. Wheelwright.
They must have double backed.
Mr. Wheelwright,
found this note the horse's bridle.
Dear Verle,
I didn't want to go away mad.
Can I go back to San Francisco with you?
I saw just enough of it to want to see more.
You think I'd take Silky's money and pearls back to him without you there to watch it?
No, I didn't think you would.
Heyes, I know you're smart, but you're not a mind reader.
How did you know Wheelwright was gonna seal that envelope?
Well, I was pretty sure he would.
But I reduced the odds a little
by heaving this one along, too.
Don't ever let them back in.
All right, on your feet.
You try throwing us out of here, someone's liable to get hurt.
I really don't think Mr. Wheelwrong wants that.
You talk real tough.
Mr. Wheelwright said to throw you out,
that's what we gotta do.
Well now, gentlemen, I think you'd be smart just to
step back.
We're willing and able to
walk out without any help at all.
Sorry, you ain't do that.
And I hope you don't try for your guns, because
Mr. Wheelwright didn't say to kill ya, he just said throw you out.
Fellas, if you'd just step aside,
nobody will get killed.
Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry
The two most successful outlaws
in the history of the West
and in all the trains and banks
they robbed they never shot anyone.
This made our two
Kansas cousins very popular
with everyone
but the railroads and the banks.
One thing
we gotta get, Heyes.
What's that?
Out of this business.
The governor can't come flat out
and give you amnesty now
first you gotta prove you deserve it.
Lom, are you saying that all
we've got to do is stay out of trouble
until the governor figures
that we deserve amnesty?
And in the meantime
we'll still be wanted?
Well, that's true
until then only you me and
the governor will know about it.
It'll be our secret.
That's a good deal?
I sure wish the governor let
a few more people in our secret.
Heyes, I almost hate to go in there.
What if you're wrong?
What if we really don't have $15,000 worth?
Kid, I said a $15,000 at minimum.
We probably got us $18,000 worth.
Come on.
$15,000 minimum...
Why do I listen? Why?
How can I know our scale was off?
Anyway, what's so awful about the $8,000?
It's not exactly Irish wages.
I wish you'd stop making cracks about the Irish!
Our grandfather was Irish.
You didn't answer the question.
Our plan won't work if all we've got is $8,000.
That's what's so awful about $8,000.
You're right.
We can't go to Bolivia with only $8,000 it's not enough.
All right, what's the plan now?
We double the 8,000.
How?
How?
Do I have to come up with all the answers?
Kid, I got it.
Heyes,
may I remind you of times past when you said those very words with
results I'd rather not even bring up at this time.
Remember Wheelwright?s Palace in Centralia?
What about Wheelwright?s Palace in Centralia?
Remember the poker game with $1,000 buy-in?
Oh, the one you wanted to get into by selling the horses, burros, saddles and equipment?
Yeah, that's the one.
I remember it.
Kid, I could do it.
They play terrible poker there, I could double our money.
You could also undouble our money.
Now, you know that I never lose at poker.
The other players really understand the game - I quit.
Those guys at Wheelwrights don't understand the game.
I've watched them.
All right,
I'll admit,
if the game isn't crooked you can't lose.
It's probably crooked.
Well, that's when I really win.
There is no way to cheat at poker that I can't spot
like that!
And take full advantage of it.
All right,
maybe it's a good idea.
Yeah.
Except for one thing.
It doesn't leave me anything to do.
Well, sure it does.
You stay here and sell our horses, burros, saddles and equipment.
I'm out.
I call.
I call.
I'm out.
Pass.
Aces and queens.
Three jacks.
Ah, another nice pot.
Ante up, gentlemen.
Get your money in there.
There we go.
It?s about time I got one of those hands.
Just about your turn.
Ante up, fellas.
My hand, right?
Pass.
Pass.
Open for 50.
Too steep for me.
I'm out.
Fold.
I'm in.
I call.
Out.
Cards, gentlemen?
Three.
Take one.
Three.
Opening bet's 100.
Well sir, if you compare, I'll raise you.
Make it an even 1,000.
I'm out.
I call the 1,000
and raise you 2,000.
Well, that is mighty strong.
I don't think it's strong enough.
Call your 2.
Now, let's see where the strength really is.
Up $5000.
Now, if you'd only drawn one card I just call.
But since you drew three,
I'll call 5,000.
I think, I'll raise you what I've got in front of me here.
There's 4,000 back at you Mr. Wheelwright.
Since the table stakes rule forces me to just call you,
Here's your 4,000.
Show your hand, you're called.
Four kings.
Well, now that is a mighty strong hand,
but not quite strong enough.
Four aces.
Sheesh, that's something.
You had a pair of aces and refused to open?
Well, I was under the gun,
so I decided to take a little risk.
But maybe I just read your face.
Nobody reads my face, Mr. Wheelwright.
Unless I want him to.
You don't pass the open with a pair of aces, not in a game like this.
Really?
I just did.
That paid handsomely.
Aren't going away mad, are you?
No, Mr. Wheelwright.
No, I had a grandfather
who was born in Kilkenny.
They've got an old saying there:
Don't get mad,
get even.
218, please.
Don't you have your key?
You know I left it here.
You sure?
It's not in the box.
It's my mistake. I've got it right here.
Good night.
Good night.
I learned a few tricks from you, Joshua.
Your key's over there on the dresser.
Well, how we doing?
Heyes,
how we doin'?
I'm broke flat.
The money you got for the burros, horses and equipment
that's what we got.
You are broke?
A man who can't lose at poker is broke?
The man who quits when other players know what they're doing is broke!?
$4,000 I was ahead $4,000.
And then suddenly they made a switch.
Brought in a mechanic.
May I quote:
There's no way to cheat at poker that I can't spot like that.
Don't stop now.
All right, how'd it happen?
I guess, Wheelwright decided here I was
a stranger in town about to take away a lot of homegrown money
so he brought in an artist.
I mean a real artist.
Hands like Paganini and twice as talented.
He must have pawned the whole deck after the cut and then dealt from the stack
when I didn't see it.
I didn't even get a hint of it.
You think the game was crooked just for one hand?
Wheelwright knew that that was all he could get away with, it was all he
was all he needed.
Boy, they sent me up like real masters.
Wheelwright checked with aces, I opened with a pair of kings,
he stayed, drew three cards, I drew the ones I was supposed to, two more kings,
They knew I'd figure Wheelwright for anything but aces.
He'd have opened if he'd had aces.
It was beautiful.
I had to figure I had a lock on the game,
so I bet it that way.
Well,
as grandpa Curry used to say:
You show me a poor man and I'll show you a man who ain't got any money.
Well, we're gonna get it back.
The whole 12,000.
How?
I'm working on it.
You're working on it?
Heyes, if anything happens to Wheelwright - anything -
you're the man they're gonna be looking for.
Kid, I didn't say I was gonna steal it, I said we're gonna get it back.
And I said how?
I haven't got the foggiest idea.
But there's got to be a way.
Kid, the fog is cleared.
I think I know a way.
We begin by you going to Denver and finding Georgette.
I go to Denver?
Why don't you go to Denver?
Because I've got to go to San Francisco to see Silky.
He's got something I have to borrow.
By something you mean money?
No,
no, it's kind of a
weapon.
Miss Charlotte Brandon.
Mr. Chauncey Gaylord Brandon.
My sister and I would like adjoining suites, please.
Of course, Mr. Brandon.
How long do you plan on staying?
Perhaps permanently.
We're here looking into investment opportunities.
Is that so?
May I recommend you to speak with Mr. Wheelwright?
Mr. who?
Wheelwright.
He owns this hotel, the feed and grain company and who knows...
May we see our accommodations now,
please?
Yes, ma'am.
George,
way you handle that room clerk
it was beautiful.
It was like the sound that one...
Now, that is timing.
Timing?
You are two days late.
I have been holed up in a loft at the livery stable.
I haven't had a shave or a bath.
I am miserable.
Timing!
Hello, Heyes, how are you?
Fine, George.
Now.
Need a nickel for a bath?
Oh, hi Kid.
Now, here it is.
Isn't that a thing of beauty, huh?
Oh yes, but
it scares me to death, Heyes.
You...
you better go over this whole thing with me.
No George, I can't. I gotta get out of here now.
I'll meet you both in Westfield.
Now...
here's the fake.
Now, don't get them mixed up.
It's a good fake.
I'll see you both in Westfield.
Heyes, nothing is gonna happen,
unless you tell me exactly how this is supposed to work - 3,000 or no 3,000.
3,000?
Well, it was 3,000 or find somebody else, and believe me there was nobody else.
3,000.
All right,
with expenses Wheelwright now owes us 15,000.
George,
sit down.
Now George, I know the kid explained it just fine,
but here's how it goes.
First, you do absolutely nothing.
We let Wheelwrong - I mean Wheelwright - make the first move.
Go get Sam,
have him take over the care of feeding these nice young ladies.
Yes sir, Mr. Wheelwright.
Please pardon my intrusion, but aren't you Miss Brandon, Mr. Brandon?
Yes sir, we are.
I'm Verle Wheelwright.
I just want to welcome you and Miss Brandon to our fair city.
Well, that's most gracious of you, sir.
May I present my sister Charlotte.
Verle Wheelwright, Charlotte.
How do you do.
Charmed.
I see you are having coffee.
May I order a brandy for you?
Well now only if you?ll enjoy it with us.
I'd be delighted.
Brandy, the best.
So even before he died,
our father convinced us that the West was the place to invest our inheritance.
In his will he mentioned several places he felt promising and in this area is one of them.
He was entirely correct in both his conclusions.
I'd like to offer a toast.
To your success,
may it be swift and sure.
Mr. Wheelwright, your sense of humor will put Mr. Twain himself to shame.
I know him.
I met him when he was a struggling young reporter.
And he isn't funny at all at a dinner table.
But of course, I'm not funny when I get a pen in my hand.
Oh, oh my goodness, my pearls!
Oh, what a shame.
Quickly.
There, here are some.
Chauncey you just hand them to me.
I'll put them...
Yes, sister dear.
There's one over there.
That looks like about all.
...seven.
Ah,
48, 49, 50.
Oh, thank goodness, they're all here.
Mr. Wheelwright,
may I ask you a great favor?
Of course.
You surely know the
the best jeweler in town not to mention the most honest one.
Could you have these restrung for me?
I'll pay for them, of course.
Oh no, you won't, young lady.
After all it was my joke you're laughing at when they broke.
Oh, you're very kind.
There you are, Mr. Wheelwright.
I hope you know,
this is not just the necklace,
this
is a work
of arts.
How much would you say this is worth, Otto, in cold cash?
$50,000 at least.
You're sure?
Absolutely.
Those are the most beautifully matched pearls.
I would give $40,000 for the necklace myself.
Sorry, Otto,
it's not for sale.
Oh, thank you very much, Mr. Wheelwright.
Who is it?
Verle Wheelwright, Miss Brandon.
Oh, just a minute.
I have your necklace, may I come in?
I can see there's something troubling you.
May I ask what it is?
My brother and I are leaving for Atlanta on the next stagecoach.
But...
but why?
I was supposed to receive a large sum of money this morning and
instead I received a telegram
saying that our estate was being challenged by some
Yankee nephew of my father.
Our money is being held up by the bank.
We have to go home and fight this thing.
I'm truly sorry to hear all this.
I have your necklace here.
Good as new.
Thank you, Mr. Wheelwright.
Is there anything I can do?
Oh, no, no, but I...I do thank you for offering.
We'll win, and we'll be back I promise you that.
You know, it takes money to fight court battles.
I'll borrow it.
Mr. Wheelwright,
did your jeweler
mention anything about my
necklace.
He admired it very much.
Did he happen to say anything about its value?
Yes, he did happen to mention that
he'd be willing to pay $40,000 for it.
himself.
It's worth much more than that!
Oh, I'm sure it is.
Mr. Wheelwright,
would you be willing to take my necklace as collateral
and lend me at interest of course
uh...say $15,000?
Miss Brandon,
I was about to suggest that very thing myself.
Can we arrange it immediately?
We certainly can.
There.
Well, I wish all business dealings could be handled so well
and so quickly.
It isn't over yet.
There's the matter of the money.
5,000 10,000 $15,000.
Thank you. And now I have one more favor to ask.
May I see where my necklace will be kept?
I mean it once belonged to my grandmother,
Charlotte Jefferson Beauregard and I
well I treasure it.
Miss Brandon, you just come with me.
They're safer here than in any bank vault you could name.
Banks are dark and empty at night,
thieves can sneak in and blow their safes.
This casino never closes, that's why it's never been robbed.
They'll be safer here than it's ever been before.
Miss Br...
may call you Charlotte?
Only if I may call you Verle.
Now, Charlotte,
if I can help you in any way at all you just telegraph me.
Mr. Wheelwright.
Mr. Bran...
you know I feel very strange calling your sister by her first name but not you.
May I?
Of course, Mr. Wheelwright. It's Chauncey, it's Chauncey Beauregard Brandon.
Now remember, Chauncey,
you can always count on Verle Wheelwright, if the need arises.
All right, folks let's go.
We're ten minutes late already.
Good luck, Chauncey.
Why, thank you, Verle.
Charlotte.
Yes.
Put up a good fight.
We certainly will,
and thank you, Verle.
Go wake Fanny up, tell her to get dressed in the gladdest rags she?s got.
Right away, Mr. Wheelwright.
For the life of me, I'll never figure out why you and Heyes went straight.
You can get rich doing things like that.
George, what's happening to you?
You're the one that used to give Heyes and me lectures on honestness.
Well, if all people are as miserable and evil as Wheelwrong,
I don't see anything wrong with stealing from them.
Yeah.
The jails are full of people that said things just like that.
Oh, oh...
What's the matter?
You told him your name is Chauncey Beauregard Brandon.
Well, why not?
I kind of took a liking to dear old grandma Beauregard.
But that isn't how you signed the register.
It isn't?
No, you signed it Chauncey Gaylord Brandon.
Well, who reads all hotel registers anyway?
Verle Wheelwrong might.
George,
how'd you do, huh?
Are you still scared?
Oh let go, I can't breathe.
Just kiss me.
It went so smoothly I don't believe it.
Great.
Where's the money?
In my pocket.
Why?
'Cause we got to put it in the bank.
I thought we were going to San Francisco
We are. The northbound stage leaves tomorrow and meets up with the train at Waterford.
Then why put our money in the bank here?
'Cause those banks have a business called transfer of funds.
Our money's gonna be waiting for us in San Francisco safe and sound.
I sure wish we could do that with the you-know-what.
We'll do the next best thing with a you-know-what.
What?
We'll guard it with your life.
Forgive me, Mr. Wheelwright,
but I saw the pearls from my table.
Did you purchase them?
Not exactly although you might say I took a lien on 'em.
I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up owning 'em.
Oh, wonderful.
Those are the loveliest...
Mr. Fielder, what do you think you're doing?
It's all right, Miss Turpin.
I was examining the pearls, not you.
There's something wrong.
Huh?
Excuse me, Miss Turpin.
Just one moment, please.
I don't understand.
No.
No, those are not the pearls you brought me.
In fact, they're not even pearls.
Otto,
you're trying to fox me or something?
Mr. Wheelwright,
I'm an honest man, you know.
This is a paste duplicate of the necklace you brought me.
Absolutely worthless.
Can you prove that?
Yes, come to my shop and I do just so.
Please, excuse me.
I stay.
You shoulda hit, Kid.
Hit a 15 when she?s got a 4 showing?
Well, sure there's only one face card left in the deck,
no tens, no eights, only one nine,
the odds were with you all the way.
Heyes, don't you ever let that mind of yours rest?
No, I'm not smart enough to be lazy....
like you.
I think he was trying to compliment you.
Come on out of there, there?s four shotguns on ya.
Get out of there fast or we'll blast that coach.
Come on, get outta there!
Hurry up!
Up!
Up!
Up.
Hey, boys, look at what I found.
Let's get out of here.
Folks, I'm sorry about this.
First hold up on this line in 3 years.
Lose anything of value?
No, no, no, no...
just a $50,000 pearl necklace.
A $50,000 what?
I thought we were guarding it with your life.
No, Heyes thought we were guarding it with my life.
You'd get the feeling they knew what they were looking for?
Feeling...
I know they knew what they were looking for.
Which tells us who's behind it, right?
Who?
Wheelwrong.
He must have got suspicious and checked the necklace.
Nah,
no, George handled him fine, he couldn't got suspicious.
Probably he just took the necklace out and hung it onone of his women
and somebody took a good look at it.
Do you really think Wheelwrong, I mean Wheeleright's got it?
What are you gonna tell Silky?
Silky?
Why, I'm not worried about Silky.
Silky O'Sullivan has the warmest heart of any man I ever knew.
You haven't got it?
You let somebody steal it?
I don't believe it!
You wouldn't dare come back here if that had happened.
Hey, you're joking, aren't you?
My necklace isn't really lost at all, is it?
Because if it is
I think I'll kill you.
Answer me, Heyes!
Well, now Silky it's not exactly lost.
We know who's got it.
And don't you worry, Silky,
we're gonna get it back for you.
How?
Well, we start by borrowing some money,
say $15,000?
Heyes, why do you keep saying we?
Charlotte,
or I may I call you Miss Brandon?
You're back much sooner than I expected.
Could we speak alone, Mr. Wheelwr...wright.
Why not?
Thank you.
Mr. Wheelwright,
I want to make this perfectly clear:
I tried to swindle you.
Is that so?
Yes.
You aren't being candid Mr. Wheelwrong...wright,
you know I tried to swindle you.
But I was forced into it.
That is so?
Yes.
By my scheming brother Chauncey.
He's dominating me since we were children.
I did inherit that necklace from my grandmother Charlotte Beauregard.
And my brother saw a way to use it for gain.
He was finally able to coerce me into doing what we did.
Is that so?
Yes.
I'm throwing myself upon your mercy, Verle.
And I'm deeply ashamed.
I want to undo what I did.
I want to give you back your $15,000 and I have it right here.
Miss Brandon,
I'll be candid with you, truly candid.
You did try to swindle me,
since I didn't exactly come down with yesterday's rain you didn't get away with it.
Now having failed,
you come and offer to give me back what you took me for if I'll call it all even.
and forgotten, right?
Charlotte,
you are a charming,
pretty, young lady,
but you're not that charming,
that pretty.
The answers is no.
But...but Verle, I...
I was a victim, too...a victim of my brother's...uh...
greed and domination.
Oh, Charlotte,
I doubt if there's a man alive who could dominate you.
In any case, as I said the answer is no.
But I have the money right here
and our signed agreement.
I want to give the money back to you and have my necklace returned to me,
as per our agreement.
Little lady,
you'll give me my money I'll be happy to give you back your necklace.
The necklace you gave me to put my safe.
Otto, tells me it's worth about two or three hundred dollars.
I...I never gonna see my bother again...
he's all this doing this to me...
Oh, Charlotte,
crying doesn't do a thing for me
and it sure isn't doing anything for you.
All right,
we try Plan B - frontal assault.
And just who is involved in this
frontal assault.
All three of us.
Sorry,
plan A was little old me alone, and Plan B is you and the Kid alone.
If I had to listen to him laugh once more, I kill!
Who?
You - for getting me into this.
For getting you into this?
Yeah!
George, you named your prize and fought your way in.
Now, just wait a minute...
All right!
It's all right now, George.
You don't have to be there.
We'll handle it.
Thank you, Heyes.
Don't mention it, George.
We're saving you for Plan C.
Well, well, well...
I should have figured it all out long before now, but I didn't.
I never put you two together.
We didn't figure you would.
We'd like to talk.
I already talked
to your...sister.
Charming little thing.
She cries even better than Sarah Bernhardt herself.
But I can't stand crying.
Oh, we'd like to talk about something else.
And we seldom cry.
Well, like I you know, you can't sell that necklace, Mr. Wheelwright,
it's too well-known.
You sell it and we'll know in a matter of days
and there goes your claim my sister gave you a fake.
And she just offered to pay back the money you loaned her.
You could get yourself in serious trouble.
You fellas really want to push this?
Yup.
But you do, I'll get that string of fake pearls out
and have all three of you thrown into jail so fast you'll think it's yesterday.
Why don't we just settle this peacefully, huh, Mr. Wheelwright?
If you try and sell that necklace or even use it, we'll have you in jail just like that.
The one way you're getting money from that necklace
is to break it up and sell those pearls one at a time
and that way you'd net less than $15,000.
Now, we're willing to buy the necklace from you.
The real one.
For $15,000.
Let you off scot-free.
Not on your life.
Scot-free!?
You've still got the money you stole from me with that stacked deck.
I don't know what you're talking about.
The answer is no
like I gave the little lady.
Throw these two out.
Don't ever let them back in.
All right, on your feet.
You try throwing us out of here, someone's liable to get hurt.
I really don't think Mr. Wheelwrong wants that.
You talk real tough.
Mr. Wheelwright said to throw you out,
that's what we gotta do.
Well now, gentlemen, I think you'd be smart just to
step back.
We're willing and able to
walk out without any help at all.
Sorry, you ain't do that.
And I hope you don't try for your guns, because
Mr. Wheelwright didn't say to kill ya, he just said throw you out.
Fellas, if you'd just step aside,
nobody will get killed.
Let 'em go.
I don?t want a ruckus here in the casino
Well now,
where were we?
We were finished.
The answer was no
it still is.
Can't even steal it back.
Can't get near that safe the casino never closes.
I know,
we gotta use Plan C.
We can't,
it isn't any good.
I know, but it's all we've got.
Yeah, but it depends on split-second timing, Heyes.
Worked fine if we could rehearse it with Wheelwright,
but I don't think he'd be too cooperative.
The Kid's right.
I thought you weren't a gambler. Plan C is all gamble.
The odds aren't that bad, maybe two to one.
Those are good odds?
Kid, we've looked at worse.
With odds like that, you're willing to risk losing Silky's $15,000?
On top of the pearls?
You really want to take that chance?
I want that necklace back.
And I want our money back.
Not to mention George's 3,000.
Now George,
we can't do this without you.
You're willing to give it a try?
Well, I guess so.
Silky will come looking for you, not me.
But promise me you won't make Verle laugh.
Oh well, you're safe there George,
he doesn't find us very funny.
Miss Brandon,
I almost sent you a message refusing to see you.
I was playing poker.
But you are a woman
you really are a young and pretty one,
so here I am.
But I'll speak to you on only one condition.
What?
That you promise not to cry.
All right,
But I'd like to make a condition, too.
That you promise not to laugh.
Oh dear,
what can I do for you, Charlotte?
My friends would like to make another offer.
Oh, no, not interested.
You're not interested in selling us back the necklace for $30,000?
30,000?
Cash?
Yes.
The 15,000 we took from you and $15,000 profit.
When?
Now.
Well, well...
your friends are full of surprises.
Tell 'em meet me at my table in a half hour.
Takes me that long to close the game and get your necklace.
And thank you, Verle.
They're doing this for me and
I really do appreciate you're cooperating with them.
Brandon, gentlemen, have a seat at my desk.
Well,
a certain sum of cash money was mentioned.
Shall we start with that?
Why not?
5,000
10,000
00:42:38,609 --> 00:42:39,641
00:42:40,841 --> 00:42:41,983
00:42:45,056 --> 00:42:46,330
30,000
We're off to a good start.
Before you put that money away, Mr. Wheelwright, I'd...
I'd like to see my necklace.
That's a reasonable request.
Mr. Wheelwright,
this is not the genuine necklace.
I am shocked, Verle, that you would try to cheat me!
These are the faked pearls, that's the good one.
I do apologize, Verle.
This is the...genuine one.
See you're keeping both.
Planning to try this little game with somebody
a little stupider than I am?
Oh, no.
You've taught me a lesson I'll never forget.
You can't cheat an honest man
Verle, we want to thank you very much.
You've been more than generous.
And I want you to know we mean that sincerely.
I think so, too.
Don't get mad, get even.
Oh, dear...
Verle, bye.
Bye.
It didn't take 'em long, did it?
It's untraceable here, Mr. Wheelwright.
They must have double backed.
Mr. Wheelwright,
found this note the horse's bridle.
Dear Verle,
I didn't want to go away mad.
Can I go back to San Francisco with you?
I saw just enough of it to want to see more.
You think I'd take Silky's money and pearls back to him without you there to watch it?
No, I didn't think you would.
Heyes, I know you're smart, but you're not a mind reader.
How did you know Wheelwright was gonna seal that envelope?
Well, I was pretty sure he would.
But I reduced the odds a little
by heaving this one along, too.