Alfred Hitchcock Presents (1955–1962): Season 6, Episode 37 - Make My Death Bed - full transcript

Good evening fellow creatures,

this evening we are making
a daring experiment,

we shall present a blank screen,

and let your imagination
fill in the picture,

since I have no idea
what you are thinking,

I have no idea what
you are seeing,

I understand a good
many men watch our show,

of course I’m sure their
wives occasionally,

peek in from the kitchen,

but when they see the
show hasn't begun,

they return to their work,



I’m afraid our experiment
may be getting out of hand,

I shall ask our sponsor
to fill the screen,

with his own wholesome
untroubled thoughts,

this is especially
designed for those of you,

with nothing at all on your mind.

MAKE MY DEATH BED

A man in a chair all by
himself from new year's eve.

You have any suggestions?

I believe in two-fisted
drinking one on each hand here.

You take one.

Thank you.

Is this the best you can do? Seems to
me a girl would be more fun right now.

Oh she would she would but I
got a wife sitting up there.

In scarlet town where I was born,



there was a fair maid dwellings,

made every youth cry well a day,

her name was Barbara Allen...

I just love him singing, I
guess that's why I married him,

What's the name of that song?

-Barbara Allen.
-Jack, how about a reader?

Oh, sure doc I’ll get it for you.

Bob it is very often we get
you and Della out the party.

You leave him alone, he's
having a good time,

there are going to be no babies
born tonight so far as we know.

Don't be too sure.

Spoilsport.
-Hey listen isn't anybody going to drive,

my goulash? I’ve been chained
to a hot stove all day.

I bet bob would like it
better than he does mine.

-You wanted some?
-Yeah.

Jackie how about trying
to sum Bish to Ken's ghoulash?

Oh, yeah sure.

You know I never met
Bash Darby before,

he certainly seems to be in love
with the sound of his own voice,

-what's he do?
-He's a farm equipment salesman,

he was transferred up
here about two months ago.

He seems to be quite
a salesman all right.

Is it true what they
say about Dixie?

Well I don't know Dixie but
I’m sure willing to try.

Hey, it's almost a
new year, couldn't be,

any worse than the old
one that's for sure.

I better go and get my wife.

Happy new year
everybody 12 o'clock,

happy new year.

Okay now I’m on my way,

this is Paul, she's in
labor, two weeks early.

Hey hey,

-Happy new year.
-Happy new year.

-You mean you don't play golf man?
-No.

Oh, you don't know
what you're missing.

Oh all that walking
after a little ball.

That's not just that, little
ball that you're walking after,

-it's uh, and business.
-What do you mean?

Why do you want to join the country
club sell some of those plows, huh?

Well you already
got me in the lines.

Now sweetheart, you
listened to cam.

Oh, yeah, I heard him, I heard him,

after all I did buy that house
on his recommendation, didn't I?

That's a good
investment you'll see.

Darling when out of
cigarettes I think,

I’ll pop down to the
crossing and get some.

Bish would you mind moving your car
from the driveway it's blocking mine.

No, not at all, I’ll be right back.

-Bye bye then.
-Bye.

Ken, Ken you sure have
been a great help to us,

Bish and I was so out of
things and it hadn't been for,

you and Elise we never
would have been accepted it.

No, wasn't us, was Bish's guitar and his
husky baritone voice that opened the,

door.

My goodness, Elise is so pretty.

Plenty of cigarettes here
she didn't have to go.

Well maybe she didn't
want to run too low.

Your car is gone I uh I
guess Bish drove her down.

Yes, well they
they'll be back soon.

Now what am I going
to do with this?

-Can I help? -No it's all right honey,
I can manage thank you.

I guess you really are
leaving tomorrow aren't you?

I certainly am, honey, and I need
another week to get ready and too.

It seems a shame to be leaving
with the weather just getting nice.

But I promised the
children that they could,

visit their grandmother
during the vacation.

-Little Bish join you later?
-Yes,

yes he can't right
now he he's too busy.

Mommy, mommy is the train ready?
-No baby, not yet but it will be tomorrow.

Maddie see? I told you
she would believe me.

I believe you both, come
give aunt Elise a big hug.

Maddie's only a baby she
doesn't understand about trains.

You do though, you're a big boy you
better keep an eye on your little sister.

Yes bo you do that for mommy, huh? now out
with you both of you out, that's right.

I’m never gonna
finish this packing.

-I’ve got to be leaving
too -Oh don't run off.

-But I must.
-You know, there is something you can do for me honey.

-Anything.
-It's about Bish. -Yes.

Well I sure would appreciate if
you keep your eye on him for me,

while I’m gone just see that it eats
properly and sticks to his diet.

Diet? please don't
diet, don't tell me.

Oh, yes he doesn't take it very
seriously but he should he starts,

to put on a little weight
and before you know it...

-What can I do? -Well just keep it after
him, it's really a very simple diet.

And tell me what it is
and I’ll nag him to that.

It's just lean meat
and no potatoes and no bread,

and no desserts
saccharin in his coffee.

All right, oh what can I
drive you to the station tomorrow?

Oh no that's all right honey,
Bish will. I’ll come see you.

Oh don't bother, have a good trip
I’ll see you when you get back.

Yes honey I will.

I sure will.

Father o father come dig my grave,

I’ll dig it long and narrow,

sweet William died for me today,

I’ll die for him tomorrow,

they buried him in
the old church yard,

they buried her beside him,

through William’s heart
grew a red red, rose,

through Barbara’s groove,

a briar,

Where'd you ever learn
to play the guitar?

Oh I never took any
lessons I just,

sort of started picking at the strings.

Uh, so do it yourself, huh?

Play some more.

Oh give me a chance
to get my breath,

that was a big supper we just had.

No one would ever guess
you were on a diet.

Well I’m not I’m
supposed to be but,

I just can't seem
to get around to it.

-Who told you anyway?
-Jackie.

-Well have you heard from her yet?
-Yeah yeah,

I got a wire from her yesterday
she's at her folks place.

Oh I promised Jackie I’d help keep
you slim now where's that saccharin.

-Well there's no use I’ll just forget it anyway.
-I won't let you forget.

-How about a brandy everyone?
-Not me.

-No, no thank you.
-I’ll take one.

All right.

Ken sure missed a great dinner.

Well he'd never miss a junior
chamber of commerce meeting.

You know he's been after me
to join, I just might do that,

-because business. Business,
that's all men ever think about,

-Is that so bad?
-Well let's just say it's not stimulating,

I have a theory, men should
make money put it in,

their wives checking accounts
and then forget about it.

It's a good thing you're
not married to a doctor.

Yeah speaking of doctors I’m
reminded that I work 24 hours a day,

-it's getting late honey.
-Okay, I better go home.

Yeah, I hate to run but if
I should get a call,

that fog is going to really slow
us up getting back to town.

-Don't get up, we had a lovely dinner.
-Oh I’m glad you came. -Thanks, bye.

-Good night Bish.
-Bye.

Hello,

yes this is dr Hudson’s residence,

this is his wife
I’ll take a message,

what?

oh no,
where?

yes, yes he'll be over right away.

Bob wake up,

that was
the sheriff,

they want you to go to the
Taylor place right away,

Ken Taylor just shot
and killed Bish Darby.

And I guess there's nothing more
we can do until the doc arrives.

-Hi uh doc.
-Dougher.

There he is.

-Here.
-Yeah I guess so.

Hello Della.

You do have cigarette on you?

everyone here seems to run out.

-thank you.
-How about some coffee?

I’m going to have some.

There is some on
the bar from dinner.

I I walked in I walked right in,

I’ll drink this,
make you feel better.

-I can't drink coffee without sugar.
-I’ll get some. -Oh don't bother I’ll use this.

-They won't do anything, can will they?
-I don't know.

-It was all my fault I’ll say so.
-It's rather late now.

Jackie I, I feel so sorry for her,

poor little Jackie, what did
she ever do to deserve this?

it was hardly worth it,

but I thought I’d die
if I couldn't have him,

but it was hardly worth it,

Jackie and the kids without Bish,

the world without Bish,

the guitar without Bish,

I sure found this one up, didn't I?

of course it was the
original mistake,

my mistake, in thinking Ken would
put up with anything from me.

-Is that why you married him?
-Yes.

I could have had almost
anyone in Belfont,

your Bob for instance,
but I didn't want him,

only Bish,

Oh Della, just look at me,

tell me, was I meant for
just one man and one life?

was I meant to be dedicated to the
gods of Bellefonte respectability?

You could have gotten
out of Bellefonte.

Bish was the only one,

the only one since I was married,

the only one I was serious about.

I guess the gods of Bellefonte
respectability weren't,

working for Bish and Jackie
when they sent them here.

Della, let's see
you a moment please,

-how's she taking it?
-She's all right,

don't you think you
should call Jackie?

No I think you better call.
-Not me,

you let her best friend do it.

I feel so odd all of a sudden,

odd...

I’ll get Bob to give you something.

No no don't bother,

I’ll just lie down
here for a while,

where did Ken get the gun, Della?

how long do you
suppose he's had it?

I don't know.

When Ken walked in he just
stood there then he said,

I’ve waited long enough
but I’ve got you now,

and then he just took out the gun.

Try not to think about.

It taked steak for dinner
because Bish's dieting,

those diets when he thinks
he's putting on a little weight,

Jackie and I laughed about it,

Bish is dead, and I’m talking
about him as if he isn't,

it was Ken's coming
back that did it, I,

I forgot about the JC's letting their
meetings out early on foggy night,

it it was the fog,

they always come home
early when it's foggy,

so many of them live on the lake.

You're talking too much
now try and get some rest.

You gotta call Jackie for me, not?

I couldn't I’d make
such a mess of it.

Look if you knew about Bish and Elise why
didn't you at least try to warn Jackie.

I hadn't seen her for
ages, besides she knew.

I guess I should have tried,

You think it
would have helped?

Well an unfaithful husband
is better than a dead one.

Come on Ken,

I’m going downtown now.

-finish the report yet doc?
-No, just the uh preliminary.

What about mrs Taylor, can
we get hold of her family?

I don't think they're
likely to show up.

Well doesn't she have any
friends she can go to?

None that I know of.

Can you stay with
her just for tonight?

Looks like she's in a
pretty bad state of shock

There's no one else
to do it, is there.

Good night doctor see
you in the morning.

Bye Clint.

Might as well call Jackie now.

Hello,

fellow operator I’d
like to place a long,

distance telephone call
Huntersville Mississippi,

that's true,

just a minute, honey,

do you happen to know Jackie’s
name before she was married?

uh parents name?

I don't know I don't
think I ever knew.

Their name is Bliss, her father's
name is Beau Regard Bliss.

Elise you're drinking
too much coffee,

what you need is sleep.

...Beau Regard Bliss,

that's right operator,

when you get the Bliss residence I’d
like to talk to a mrs Bish Darby,

Darby, yeah that's right,

all right I’ll hold on up minute.

-I feel awful.
-I’m going to stay with you tonight.

Thank you.

I keep thinking of that
song Bish used to sing,

Barbara Allen,

you know it?
-Yes I know it.

"When he
was dead,

and laid in grave
her heart was struck,

with sorrow oh
mother mother,

make my bed,

for I shall die tomorrow,

oh mother, mother
make my bed,

oh make it long and narrow,

sweet William died for me today,

Mrs Darby, Jackie?

Jackie this is Bob Hudson.

hello Bob.

I’m afraid I have bad
news for you Jackie,

it's Bish,

he's dead.

All right.

What was that?

I said,

you want me to give myself
up to the authorities here,

or should I come back there?

But Jackie I’m afraid
you don't understand.

I mean who should arrest me.

I’m trying to tell you
that Bish has been killed,

he was shot.

Shot?

-Shot?
-Yes it was...

Ken...

it was Ken.

Jackie do you mind if I speak to
your mother or your father please?

If, if Ken shot Bish,

there's something
that you'd better do.

I uh, I don't know what
you're talking about.

You better do something
about that saccharine.

Saccharin?

Yes,

the saccharin that I left for Bish,

-it was poison.
-Bob...

She's dead.

Oh well we all make mistakes
poor Jackie Darby had no,

way of telling that her rival
shared her husband's diet,

now here's another commercial
after which I shall return,

some of you have inquired
about the small bullet holes,

in the commercial
you have just witnessed,

this should explain,

the preceding film was selected
and shown to the armed forces,

actually it was nothing
30 caliber and under,

but next time we
hope to persuade the,

sponsor to make a personal
appearance instead,

now until next week, good night.