Adventure Time (2010–2018): Season 3, Episode 2 - Morituri Te Salutamus - full transcript
Finn and Jake end up in a haunted arena where they must fight ghost gladiators to escape.
♪ Adventure time ♪
♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪
♪ We'll go to very
distant lands ♪
♪ With Jake the dog
and Finn the human ♪
♪ The fun will never end ♪
♪ It's Adventure Time ♪
Aah!
Aah! Ooh!
Jake, why didn't you
stick to the plan?
Pssh.
Hey, you want to
bump baby lumps?
Sick. No.
Just try to follow
the plans, okay?
Yeah.
Bleeaghhh!
Come on out, cuties.
It's safe now.
Now get out of here!
Hee hee hee hee.
Hey.
You hear something?
Up there!
It's a fat, fat warrior beat.
It's all kshh! Kshh! Kshh!
It calls me forth. Kshh!
Man, it's probably
just puberty calling.
Fighters.
Fighters!
Seek you glory from
the Fight King?
Mmmaybe.
Then step forth beyond the
moonlight seal to ba-a-a-a-the
in blood and glory forever!
Nah.
This is a trap.
K-pshh!
We sniffed out that
trap like champs...
Tryin' to get us up
in that cursed arena.
Then I bet the exits would all
magically seal behind us.
We'd probably have to
fight gladiator ghosts.
Yeah!
That sounds... so dumb.
And flippin' awesome!
We're back!
Fools!
All exits are sealed!
Now you must fight my
gl-l-adiator gho-o-sts!
Yeah. Okay!
I'm-a beat you with
your own thing!
Give it up!
Ha-ha! Ohh!
Hyperion, I'm sorry.
Hyperion!
My love.
I'll kill you for
breaking your promise!
Aah!
Ugh! Yeah!
Good!
Take these branches of palm!
Yeah!
That prize kind of stinks.
Let's go, Finn. My thighs hurt.
Aw, man.
Okay, it was fun.
I'm keepin' the branch.
Where do you think
you're going?!
You must earn thy freedom by
defeating each of my ghosts.
When you are ready, speak
the Fight King's name,
and I shall raise
you for battle.
Whoa!
Ooh!
Hmm.
Okay. I have a plan.
We'll do what the Fight King
says and defeat his ghosts to
earn our freedom.
You're gonna follow
my plan, right?
Mm-hmm.
But, hey, if you replace
me with a dummy,
I could stay down here
and dig for lava!
Then I'd forge a
molten hula-hoop!
That's an entirely different
plan than my plan.
What's the hula-hoop for?
Morale, dude!
This tomb will be as fun...
♪ As a tropical island ♪
Check it out, dude!
Pat pat pat pat pat.
Badabada!
It's a dirt dummy Jake...
Just like in the plan!
We're ready, I
guess, Fight King.
Gladitoria continues
for you, human.
And, uh, uh... dog?
Yep. This is dog.
Arise, Priscus, Verus!
Raaawrr!
Yaahh!
Forgive me, Priscus.
Pity. The dog falls.
Et tu, Verus?
The combat endeth.
Now come closer, champion.
Dig! Dig! Dig! Dig!
Dig! Dig! Dig!
Two gangs?
Something crazy's
goin' on up there.
It's me, Jake... Being
here the whole time.
Come closer, my champion.
You have proven
worthy of my favor.
Word.
Uh... this is bad.
Accept your prize.
Mm!
Hwa! Hwa! Hyah! Hyah!
Finn?
Ah! The dog li-i-ves.
Yeah, I lives.
Finn, come with me, man.
Raah!
Whoa! Dude.
Sorry, man.
But you crossed my kill zone.
Fighters, rest now.
Hwa! Hwa! Hwa! Hwa!
So...
How's your side of
the plan going?
Yaah!
Plan? What plan?
To escape.
I dig and stuff and
you fight to win.
'Member?
Yeah, I fight...
To hear bones breaking
and meat tearing.
Ghosts don't got meat.
I fight...
to fight!
Hmm.
Finn is acting weird.
Probably due to a
decrease in morale.
Got to get him that
lava hula-hoop!
We're ready for our
next fight, Fight King!
Hwaah!
Got to livin' up this
unhallowed ground...
For Finn!
♪ On a tropical island
underneath a molten lava moon ♪
♪ Hangin' with the hula
dancers, askin' questions,
'cause they got
all the answers ♪
Kick!
Habet!
Amazonia!
I'm sorry!
This next takedown
is for you, my King!
Unh!
Uh... I need your forgiveness.
♪ Puttin' on the lotion ♪
♪ Sittin' by the ocean ♪
♪ Rubbin' it on my body ♪
Non pugnant, flamma!
Eludere!
Huygh!
Cum Missione, my friend.
Hoc habet! Hwaah!
Achillea!
I have defeated every gladiator.
No!
For there is one more opponent!
Who?!
Your dear companion.
Hyugh!
♪ Get me out of this ca-a-a-ve ♪
♪ 'Cause it's nothin' but
a gladiator gra-a-a-ve ♪
♪ And if I stick
to the pla-a-a-n ♪
♪ I think I'll turn
into a lava ma-a-a-n ♪
♪ I think I'll turn
into a lava man ♪
Why do you stop?
Fight King, this
Jake was a farce!
Let me face the real Jake!
Then this is round 2, my vassal.
Take his head for me!
Yes, my King.
What about the plan?!
This is the plan, Jake.
Raah!
You're gonna kill me?
That's right!
Everything has been
building to this...
The final battle!
Brother against brother...
To the death!
No!
Yes!
Ye-e-e-e-s!
Fight King!
I can't do it.
I can't kill him, Fight King.
I can't kill my best friend.
Finn...
Not without a bigger sword!
Yes! Finish him!
No!
Raah!
Wink.
What?!
Dude, did you...
Was that all fake?
Did you act all that out?
Was that a part of your plan?
Mm-hmm.
So you planned to get all
cozy with the Fight King
and almost kill me
from the get-go?
Pretty much.
Why didn't you say so?
Because you always
bungle my plans.
But if you had
bungled this one...
I might have for real
chopped your head off.
That's some funky junk, brother.
Hey, Jake.
You notice how all these
ghosts are walkin' in pairs.
Oh. yeah!
I bet they're like us...
Best bros who got
trapped in that arena.
But now they're free.
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
♪ We can wander
through the forest ♪
♪ And do so as we please ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ To a cliff under a tree ♪
This party is so crazy!
♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪
♪ We'll go to very
distant lands ♪
♪ With Jake the dog
and Finn the human ♪
♪ The fun will never end ♪
♪ It's Adventure Time ♪
Aah!
Aah! Ooh!
Jake, why didn't you
stick to the plan?
Pssh.
Hey, you want to
bump baby lumps?
Sick. No.
Just try to follow
the plans, okay?
Yeah.
Bleeaghhh!
Come on out, cuties.
It's safe now.
Now get out of here!
Hee hee hee hee.
Hey.
You hear something?
Up there!
It's a fat, fat warrior beat.
It's all kshh! Kshh! Kshh!
It calls me forth. Kshh!
Man, it's probably
just puberty calling.
Fighters.
Fighters!
Seek you glory from
the Fight King?
Mmmaybe.
Then step forth beyond the
moonlight seal to ba-a-a-a-the
in blood and glory forever!
Nah.
This is a trap.
K-pshh!
We sniffed out that
trap like champs...
Tryin' to get us up
in that cursed arena.
Then I bet the exits would all
magically seal behind us.
We'd probably have to
fight gladiator ghosts.
Yeah!
That sounds... so dumb.
And flippin' awesome!
We're back!
Fools!
All exits are sealed!
Now you must fight my
gl-l-adiator gho-o-sts!
Yeah. Okay!
I'm-a beat you with
your own thing!
Give it up!
Ha-ha! Ohh!
Hyperion, I'm sorry.
Hyperion!
My love.
I'll kill you for
breaking your promise!
Aah!
Ugh! Yeah!
Good!
Take these branches of palm!
Yeah!
That prize kind of stinks.
Let's go, Finn. My thighs hurt.
Aw, man.
Okay, it was fun.
I'm keepin' the branch.
Where do you think
you're going?!
You must earn thy freedom by
defeating each of my ghosts.
When you are ready, speak
the Fight King's name,
and I shall raise
you for battle.
Whoa!
Ooh!
Hmm.
Okay. I have a plan.
We'll do what the Fight King
says and defeat his ghosts to
earn our freedom.
You're gonna follow
my plan, right?
Mm-hmm.
But, hey, if you replace
me with a dummy,
I could stay down here
and dig for lava!
Then I'd forge a
molten hula-hoop!
That's an entirely different
plan than my plan.
What's the hula-hoop for?
Morale, dude!
This tomb will be as fun...
♪ As a tropical island ♪
Check it out, dude!
Pat pat pat pat pat.
Badabada!
It's a dirt dummy Jake...
Just like in the plan!
We're ready, I
guess, Fight King.
Gladitoria continues
for you, human.
And, uh, uh... dog?
Yep. This is dog.
Arise, Priscus, Verus!
Raaawrr!
Yaahh!
Forgive me, Priscus.
Pity. The dog falls.
Et tu, Verus?
The combat endeth.
Now come closer, champion.
Dig! Dig! Dig! Dig!
Dig! Dig! Dig!
Two gangs?
Something crazy's
goin' on up there.
It's me, Jake... Being
here the whole time.
Come closer, my champion.
You have proven
worthy of my favor.
Word.
Uh... this is bad.
Accept your prize.
Mm!
Hwa! Hwa! Hyah! Hyah!
Finn?
Ah! The dog li-i-ves.
Yeah, I lives.
Finn, come with me, man.
Raah!
Whoa! Dude.
Sorry, man.
But you crossed my kill zone.
Fighters, rest now.
Hwa! Hwa! Hwa! Hwa!
So...
How's your side of
the plan going?
Yaah!
Plan? What plan?
To escape.
I dig and stuff and
you fight to win.
'Member?
Yeah, I fight...
To hear bones breaking
and meat tearing.
Ghosts don't got meat.
I fight...
to fight!
Hmm.
Finn is acting weird.
Probably due to a
decrease in morale.
Got to get him that
lava hula-hoop!
We're ready for our
next fight, Fight King!
Hwaah!
Got to livin' up this
unhallowed ground...
For Finn!
♪ On a tropical island
underneath a molten lava moon ♪
♪ Hangin' with the hula
dancers, askin' questions,
'cause they got
all the answers ♪
Kick!
Habet!
Amazonia!
I'm sorry!
This next takedown
is for you, my King!
Unh!
Uh... I need your forgiveness.
♪ Puttin' on the lotion ♪
♪ Sittin' by the ocean ♪
♪ Rubbin' it on my body ♪
Non pugnant, flamma!
Eludere!
Huygh!
Cum Missione, my friend.
Hoc habet! Hwaah!
Achillea!
I have defeated every gladiator.
No!
For there is one more opponent!
Who?!
Your dear companion.
Hyugh!
♪ Get me out of this ca-a-a-ve ♪
♪ 'Cause it's nothin' but
a gladiator gra-a-a-ve ♪
♪ And if I stick
to the pla-a-a-n ♪
♪ I think I'll turn
into a lava ma-a-a-n ♪
♪ I think I'll turn
into a lava man ♪
Why do you stop?
Fight King, this
Jake was a farce!
Let me face the real Jake!
Then this is round 2, my vassal.
Take his head for me!
Yes, my King.
What about the plan?!
This is the plan, Jake.
Raah!
You're gonna kill me?
That's right!
Everything has been
building to this...
The final battle!
Brother against brother...
To the death!
No!
Yes!
Ye-e-e-e-s!
Fight King!
I can't do it.
I can't kill him, Fight King.
I can't kill my best friend.
Finn...
Not without a bigger sword!
Yes! Finish him!
No!
Raah!
Wink.
What?!
Dude, did you...
Was that all fake?
Did you act all that out?
Was that a part of your plan?
Mm-hmm.
So you planned to get all
cozy with the Fight King
and almost kill me
from the get-go?
Pretty much.
Why didn't you say so?
Because you always
bungle my plans.
But if you had
bungled this one...
I might have for real
chopped your head off.
That's some funky junk, brother.
Hey, Jake.
You notice how all these
ghosts are walkin' in pairs.
Oh. yeah!
I bet they're like us...
Best bros who got
trapped in that arena.
But now they're free.
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
♪ We can wander
through the forest ♪
♪ And do so as we please ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ To a cliff under a tree ♪
This party is so crazy!