Adventure Time (2010–2018): Season 2, Episode 8 - Crystals Have Power - full transcript
Jake swears a life of non-violence right before a race of indestructible crystal-men abduct Finn to another dimension.
Yo, man, what's going on?
Oh, I found this crystal
on our doorstep.
It's pretty mysterious.
I'm trying to find
information about it
using the holo-book.
Uh, that's cool.
But you know what's really cool?
Tough guy contests.
Whoo-hoo!
♪ Tough boys! ♪
Wait, man.
Doesn't this look like
Tree Trunks' lipstick?
That's impossible.
Tree Trunks exploded in
the scary dark forest
after she ate that
crystal gem apple.
Remember?
Yeah, I remember.
Come on, man.
Tough-guy-contest me.
You got what it takes to rip it?
Uh... yeah.
Then let's get it on.
Hyah! Yeah-yo!
Hyah!
Do it, man. Do it.
Raaa!
Oh!
No!
Gotcha, dude.
I'm gonna break out.
No way.
Ha ha!
I'm breaking out with my fat.
I win, Finn. Finn?
Finn!
Finn, are you okay?
I was just messing
with you, dude.
I... was just messing with...
you.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm just gonna rest my muscles.
Oh, dang it, Jake.
You can't get all out
of control like that.
Why am I like this...
like this...
like this?
Jake, what did you
do to your brother?
We were just playing, and
then I got out of control.
I'm sorry, dad.
No, son, you did good.
Having no self-control makes
you a tough galoot, like me.
But I don't want to hurt nobody.
Well, that's too bad, kid,
'cause you're gonna
hurt everybody.
Noooo!
Whatev, daddy.
Hmph! Hmph! Hmph!
I'm never gonna hurt anybody ever...
starting now.
What's up, dude?
Finn, you're okay.
I was scared that I
mashed your potatoes
too hard last night.
Ha! You didn't mash my potatoes.
You didn't even make
me cry silently
into my pillow last night for...
30 minutes.
In fact, you ready to
go again, tough stuff?
No. No more, dude. - What?
I never want to lose
control again, man.
I'm going totally soft.
You look like a wuss.
Mm-hmm.
Hey, the crystal's glowing
a different color.
Hmm.
Jake!
Whoa.
What's it...
Chip, chap, chop!
What's going on?
Uh, which one of you
is Finn the human?
Depends on who's asking.
Are y'all good or evil?
Uh... we're good.
Oh. I'm Finn.
- Get him!
- Aah!
Hey, you guys, put my bro down.
Jake!
Finn!
Ugh! - Hey.
Hey, man, what happened?
I don't know, but I'm trapped
in this crystal ball.
Get me out of here.
Okay, I'll try to do it using
controlled conversation.
Halt.
Hey, man, I'm Jake.
Beat it.
I want to know why
you took my buddy,
and I'm not gonna use force
to get it out of you.
I'm just following orders, bub.
Whose orders?
Um... well, it's a secret,
but part of it is
we're turning Finn
into a crystal.
Jake, you should
stop these guys now.
Aaaaah!
Oh, man.
Get me out of here!
No. You're gonna look awesome
and crystal, like us.
Can't we work this
out like gents?
Get lost. - Whoa!
Jake, lose control,
flip out on those guys.
No, dad.
I've got to control myself.
♪ Control, control,
control, control ♪
Jake! Help!
My arm! Aah!
Whoa. Okay, okay.
I'm hatching a controlled plan.
All right, man,
move out of the way
and let me get my friend.
Nope. Not doing it.
Then I'll have to
move you myself...
with my mind.
You're gonna hurt yourself.
Stop it.
Your time is running
out, little dog.
Hey, speed it up in there, guys.
Okay. Turn up the juice, mang.
Yeah, mang.
Aah. Aah!
Jake! Help!
Finn!
Don't hurt my buddy.
No, Jake, no. Don't
lose control.
Jake. Jake.
Come on, punch them, Jake.
Punch everybody. Why not?
Come on! Why not?
No punchies. I am in control.
Who are you talking to?
Nobody, man! Don't look at me!
Whoa!
Did you guys see that?
Yes. Yeah.
Don't make fun of him.
He's having problems.
Everybody has... aah!
Aaaaah!
Ugh! Stupid ghost dad.
I'll show him.
Ooh. Okay.
Intimidate them with
controlled attack.
Hurry up, guys.
I got to drop a crystal donk.
Oh, come on. I don't
want to hear that.
Hey, whatever, man.
I ain't ashamed.
I got... whoa. What...
what the...
Open up!
Feel my controlled attack.
Whaaaa!
Psssh!
Whaaaa!
Psssh!
Whaaaaaaaa!
Psssh!
Stop it.
I'm not hurting you, am I?
No, you freak.
Well, there's a lot more
where that came from,
so you best tell me
why you're turning
Finn into a crystal.
Or what, you'll touch me?
So help me, I will touch you.
Aah! Jake!
Aah! Help!
Finn, oh, no.
Cut it out. He looks good.
My body!
No! My bud!
Eh, let him in. He
can't do nothing now.
I'm sorry, Finn.
I'm superlame.
And now... you're dead.
I'm not dead.
I'm just all crystal-stiff.
Oh.
Get your hands off my lover.
- That voice.
- It sounds like...
Yes, Finn, it's me, Tree Trunks.
But in this world, I'm known
as Quartzion the crystal queen.
Oh, my grosh. You're alive!
Oh, I'm more than alive, Finn.
After I ate that crystal apple
in the scary dark forest,
I was transported to
this crystal dimension,
where I became ruler
of the crystal men.
And the crystal men are
all in love with me.
- Love you, Quartzion!
- I love you!
- We love you!
- Love you!
Yes, yes, I know.
But your love...
is not enough.
Aah!
I wanted you, Finn,
so you could be transformed
into my sexy crystal king.
Tree Trunks, you've gone bananas
with crystal power.
Finn, it's not sexy for a king
to call his queen bananas.
Aah!
Jake, you've totally
got to stop her.
I'll try, man, but I'm
still figuring out my biz.
Here I come, Tree Trunks.
Taste my gentle rubs.
Whoa there.
Don't you put your
junk on my trunk.
Go, Jake! Go!
She's too sassy and powerful.
Ow!
Jake, Jake, I brought
someone here to see you.
It's your brother.
Jermaine? Are you dead?
No, man, we're just
dreaming at the same time.
Well, I'm sorry about
that time I beat you up.
Yo, that was an accident.
I knew you were
just horsing off.
But, dad, you said I'm
gonna hurt everybody.
Yeah, everybody.
I don't know, dad. That
doesn't really help me.
Everybody who is evil, Jake.
Let me finish next
time, hmm, yeah?
Oh. Well, then I'm over it then.
Jake, kick Tree
Trunks in the tummy.
She's probably still got that
crystal gem apple inside her.
That must be giving
her all her powers.
Marry me, Finn.
We can snuggle through
time and space
and kiss each other
in an alternate
dimensional plane.
Hyah!
Oh!
Oh, dear.
Yeah!
T.T., you're back.
Oh, Jake, I was behaving
so inappropriately.
I'm so embarrassed.
Oh, shush, Tree Trunks.
If I had a penny for every
time someone went crazy,
hopped up on magic energy...
I'd be Abraham Lincoln.
Tree Trunks, you're okay.
Finn!
I'm okay, too!
Oh, Finn, I was trapped
here for so long,
and all I could think about...
was you and how
you're so nice to me.
And I-I just wanted
to say I think...
you're cute, and I like you.
Okay, okay. Let's go.
Finn, when we get home,
it's apple-pie time.
Oh!
♪ Apple pie in the oven ♪
♪ Tell me you can
taste my lovin' ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
♪ We can wander
through the forest ♪
♪ and do so as we please ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ to a cliff under a tree ♪
This party is so crazy!
Oh, I found this crystal
on our doorstep.
It's pretty mysterious.
I'm trying to find
information about it
using the holo-book.
Uh, that's cool.
But you know what's really cool?
Tough guy contests.
Whoo-hoo!
♪ Tough boys! ♪
Wait, man.
Doesn't this look like
Tree Trunks' lipstick?
That's impossible.
Tree Trunks exploded in
the scary dark forest
after she ate that
crystal gem apple.
Remember?
Yeah, I remember.
Come on, man.
Tough-guy-contest me.
You got what it takes to rip it?
Uh... yeah.
Then let's get it on.
Hyah! Yeah-yo!
Hyah!
Do it, man. Do it.
Raaa!
Oh!
No!
Gotcha, dude.
I'm gonna break out.
No way.
Ha ha!
I'm breaking out with my fat.
I win, Finn. Finn?
Finn!
Finn, are you okay?
I was just messing
with you, dude.
I... was just messing with...
you.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm just gonna rest my muscles.
Oh, dang it, Jake.
You can't get all out
of control like that.
Why am I like this...
like this...
like this?
Jake, what did you
do to your brother?
We were just playing, and
then I got out of control.
I'm sorry, dad.
No, son, you did good.
Having no self-control makes
you a tough galoot, like me.
But I don't want to hurt nobody.
Well, that's too bad, kid,
'cause you're gonna
hurt everybody.
Noooo!
Whatev, daddy.
Hmph! Hmph! Hmph!
I'm never gonna hurt anybody ever...
starting now.
What's up, dude?
Finn, you're okay.
I was scared that I
mashed your potatoes
too hard last night.
Ha! You didn't mash my potatoes.
You didn't even make
me cry silently
into my pillow last night for...
30 minutes.
In fact, you ready to
go again, tough stuff?
No. No more, dude. - What?
I never want to lose
control again, man.
I'm going totally soft.
You look like a wuss.
Mm-hmm.
Hey, the crystal's glowing
a different color.
Hmm.
Jake!
Whoa.
What's it...
Chip, chap, chop!
What's going on?
Uh, which one of you
is Finn the human?
Depends on who's asking.
Are y'all good or evil?
Uh... we're good.
Oh. I'm Finn.
- Get him!
- Aah!
Hey, you guys, put my bro down.
Jake!
Finn!
Ugh! - Hey.
Hey, man, what happened?
I don't know, but I'm trapped
in this crystal ball.
Get me out of here.
Okay, I'll try to do it using
controlled conversation.
Halt.
Hey, man, I'm Jake.
Beat it.
I want to know why
you took my buddy,
and I'm not gonna use force
to get it out of you.
I'm just following orders, bub.
Whose orders?
Um... well, it's a secret,
but part of it is
we're turning Finn
into a crystal.
Jake, you should
stop these guys now.
Aaaaah!
Oh, man.
Get me out of here!
No. You're gonna look awesome
and crystal, like us.
Can't we work this
out like gents?
Get lost. - Whoa!
Jake, lose control,
flip out on those guys.
No, dad.
I've got to control myself.
♪ Control, control,
control, control ♪
Jake! Help!
My arm! Aah!
Whoa. Okay, okay.
I'm hatching a controlled plan.
All right, man,
move out of the way
and let me get my friend.
Nope. Not doing it.
Then I'll have to
move you myself...
with my mind.
You're gonna hurt yourself.
Stop it.
Your time is running
out, little dog.
Hey, speed it up in there, guys.
Okay. Turn up the juice, mang.
Yeah, mang.
Aah. Aah!
Jake! Help!
Finn!
Don't hurt my buddy.
No, Jake, no. Don't
lose control.
Jake. Jake.
Come on, punch them, Jake.
Punch everybody. Why not?
Come on! Why not?
No punchies. I am in control.
Who are you talking to?
Nobody, man! Don't look at me!
Whoa!
Did you guys see that?
Yes. Yeah.
Don't make fun of him.
He's having problems.
Everybody has... aah!
Aaaaah!
Ugh! Stupid ghost dad.
I'll show him.
Ooh. Okay.
Intimidate them with
controlled attack.
Hurry up, guys.
I got to drop a crystal donk.
Oh, come on. I don't
want to hear that.
Hey, whatever, man.
I ain't ashamed.
I got... whoa. What...
what the...
Open up!
Feel my controlled attack.
Whaaaa!
Psssh!
Whaaaa!
Psssh!
Whaaaaaaaa!
Psssh!
Stop it.
I'm not hurting you, am I?
No, you freak.
Well, there's a lot more
where that came from,
so you best tell me
why you're turning
Finn into a crystal.
Or what, you'll touch me?
So help me, I will touch you.
Aah! Jake!
Aah! Help!
Finn, oh, no.
Cut it out. He looks good.
My body!
No! My bud!
Eh, let him in. He
can't do nothing now.
I'm sorry, Finn.
I'm superlame.
And now... you're dead.
I'm not dead.
I'm just all crystal-stiff.
Oh.
Get your hands off my lover.
- That voice.
- It sounds like...
Yes, Finn, it's me, Tree Trunks.
But in this world, I'm known
as Quartzion the crystal queen.
Oh, my grosh. You're alive!
Oh, I'm more than alive, Finn.
After I ate that crystal apple
in the scary dark forest,
I was transported to
this crystal dimension,
where I became ruler
of the crystal men.
And the crystal men are
all in love with me.
- Love you, Quartzion!
- I love you!
- We love you!
- Love you!
Yes, yes, I know.
But your love...
is not enough.
Aah!
I wanted you, Finn,
so you could be transformed
into my sexy crystal king.
Tree Trunks, you've gone bananas
with crystal power.
Finn, it's not sexy for a king
to call his queen bananas.
Aah!
Jake, you've totally
got to stop her.
I'll try, man, but I'm
still figuring out my biz.
Here I come, Tree Trunks.
Taste my gentle rubs.
Whoa there.
Don't you put your
junk on my trunk.
Go, Jake! Go!
She's too sassy and powerful.
Ow!
Jake, Jake, I brought
someone here to see you.
It's your brother.
Jermaine? Are you dead?
No, man, we're just
dreaming at the same time.
Well, I'm sorry about
that time I beat you up.
Yo, that was an accident.
I knew you were
just horsing off.
But, dad, you said I'm
gonna hurt everybody.
Yeah, everybody.
I don't know, dad. That
doesn't really help me.
Everybody who is evil, Jake.
Let me finish next
time, hmm, yeah?
Oh. Well, then I'm over it then.
Jake, kick Tree
Trunks in the tummy.
She's probably still got that
crystal gem apple inside her.
That must be giving
her all her powers.
Marry me, Finn.
We can snuggle through
time and space
and kiss each other
in an alternate
dimensional plane.
Hyah!
Oh!
Oh, dear.
Yeah!
T.T., you're back.
Oh, Jake, I was behaving
so inappropriately.
I'm so embarrassed.
Oh, shush, Tree Trunks.
If I had a penny for every
time someone went crazy,
hopped up on magic energy...
I'd be Abraham Lincoln.
Tree Trunks, you're okay.
Finn!
I'm okay, too!
Oh, Finn, I was trapped
here for so long,
and all I could think about...
was you and how
you're so nice to me.
And I-I just wanted
to say I think...
you're cute, and I like you.
Okay, okay. Let's go.
Finn, when we get home,
it's apple-pie time.
Oh!
♪ Apple pie in the oven ♪
♪ Tell me you can
taste my lovin' ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
♪ We can wander
through the forest ♪
♪ and do so as we please ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ to a cliff under a tree ♪
This party is so crazy!