Adventure Time (2010–2018): Season 2, Episode 19 - Mystery Train - full transcript
While traveling on a train, Finn and Jake find themselves in the middle of a murder mystery.
Happy birthday!
Jake? Is that you?
I can't see.
Right. That's because...
I'm blind!
Jake, I'm blind on my birthday!
No, dude, you're blindfolded.
- Oh.
- Keep the blindfold on.
I've got a surprise for you.
Surprise!
Orange blindfold?
That is a surprise!
That's not the surprise.
This is.
You got me a train?
Thank you, Jake!
This isn't the gift.
Huh?
We have to take the train
to get to the gift.
Oh.
Almost as cool as a free train.
Eh.
I'll go get the tickets.
Okay.
Hey, Mr. Conductor!
It's my birthday!
Oh?
Climb aboard my
train, little boy.
You're my new friend.
All aboard!
This is gonna be the
best birthday ever.
I'm gonna go grab a schedule.
Whoa!
Oh, t-terribly sorry, Colonel.
Oh, oh, well, that's all right.
Just don't let it happen again.
Sorry about that, folks.
We are approaching
Gumball Gulch now.
The ride's gonna
get a little bumpy
until we reach the straightaway,
so you might want to buckle up.
Found a schedule.
Great.
Now find your seatbelt.
Geez Louise.
Uh, s-sorry about that, Colonel.
B-Beg your pardon.
Oh, sorry.
Uh... whoa!
Ugh! Aah!
Colonel, I am so sorry.
Hey, we're in the straightaway.
Ooh, I want to see.
I'm gonna kill you!
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
A skeleton.
Is he going to be okay, Dr.
Donut?
He doesn't look good.
Hey, man, this is
kind of a bad scene.
Maybe we should get
off this train
and hoof it to your surprise.
Are you kidding?
It's a murder
mystery on a train,
and we're gonna solve it.
All right.
What do you think, Dr.
Donut? Any clues?
Hmm.
I think it was the
guy who screamed,
"I'm gonna kill you."
Uh, no, no, it... it...
it wasn't me.
I swear!
Passengers, passengers,
I don't think it was
Colonel Candycorn.
Oh, well, well, thank you.
No, in murder mysteries,
it's never the first
person you think of...
Never, ever.
So, who do you think it is?
Colonel, do you have any
enemies on this train?
Well, uh... well, just one.
And his or her name is...
See?
I knew it wasn't him.
But now we have to figure
out who his enemy is.
It could be anybody.
It could even be you.
Yes, it could, except
I didn't do it.
But we don't know that.
You singled me out to take
suspicion off yourself.
Are you Colonel
Candycorn's enemy?
What? No.
I was just trying to join
in on the conversation.
Suspect numero uno!
Rat traps.
I really thought I
was on to something.
Now, I know this is
gonna sound crazy,
but what about the conductor?
No, it's definitely not him.
Aw. Why not?
Because he's weird and creepy,
and you never suspect
the creepy guy
because it's too obvious.
Whatever, man.
I'm gonna go sit and
look at the schedule.
We're running out of suspects.
And we're running out of time.
Attention.
Attention, passengers.
Gnarly.
Yeah. Hi. It's me...
the conductor.
Anyway, I couldn't
help overhearing
that someone here thinks
I'm weird and creepy.
And, you know, I'm not
weird and creepy.
I'm cool and awesome.
Happy birthday, Finn.
Hey, Jake?
Yeah?
The conductor was just here,
and he was weirder and
creepier than before.
What?! No way.
He was cool and awesome.
Anyway, it's still not him.
No, the murderer is
right here among us.
Isn't that right, doctor?
You think it was me?
When Candycane guy was murdered,
you diverted suspicion
towards Colonel Candycorn,
then killed him to
protect your alibi.
Are you kidding?
Dude, I think you're way off.
Am I? Or am I way on?
Son of a...
My hunches aren't
getting me anywhere.
The killer is
laughing at us, Jake.
What do you think we should do?
Hmm.
We need hard evidence.
Ha!
A basket of eggs,
fish, and cabbage.
It's a receipt from an
earlier train ride,
from another train.
Jake, I found a book.
It's a dictionary.
It's sheet music!
It doesn't make any sense to me.
Me neither.
Maybe the murderer is
just too smart for us.
Yes! Jake, that's it.
It's all so clear now.
Gather everyone in the caboose,
and I will reveal a murderer.
You're the only
remaining passengers,
so the murderer is
in this caboose.
Let me explain how I know
who the murderer is.
I saw Pineapple Guy skim
through the sheet music,
sheet music to a song
that's very special
to Lollipop Girl,
a song that reminds
her of Ice Cream Guy.
Before Colonel Candycorn died,
Dr. Ice Cream was in
possession of a basket
of cabbage, fish, and eggs.
And you, Pineapple Guy,
have cabbage bits on your socks.
And you, Chocolate Bar Guy...
Does this dictionary
look familiar,
a dictionary which happens
to contain the words
"rid," "guests," "at once."
But the real murderer is
someone no one suspects.
The real murderer is...
No one was the murderer?
The conductor's
still on the train.
Oh, yeah. He did it.
Yay! You did it! You
solved it, Finn!
I knew it... because
he's creepy.
What?! Hmph.
I know... you knew he was
the murderer all along.
I couldn't have done
it without you,
you, you, you.
Thank you.
We make a great team, pal.
You feel kind of bony.
Aah!
Jake?
No!
Hey.
How could you murder all
those candy people?
And you murdered
Jake on my birthday!
Yes, and you're next.
Wrong.
Grr!
Hunh!
Unh!
Mnh!
No!!
Ah!
Unh!
I'm coming for you!
Unh!
Ugh!
This is for Jake!
Hunh!
Unh!
Hyah!
You're going down,
or both of us are going down.
My birthday wish is vengeance!
Happy birthday to me!
Wait!
Y-You're alive!
You were the conductor
the whole time?
Yep.
You were so busy
focused on the murders
that you never even noticed.
The skeletons were
the hardest part.
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
It was all an elaborate setup
for your birthday present.
So nobody was murdered?
Nope, not unless you count
the train's control panel.
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Dude, open your eyes.
Hey, we're alive!
♪ ...to you ♪
Wow.
This is the best birthday ever.
Thanks, Jake.
You deserve it, buddy,
'cause you're a great friend.
I think my favorite part
was landing on the gelatin.
That must have taken
forever to plan.
Nope.
That part was a total accident.
Oh.
So we could have...
- Died horribly?
Yes.
Happy birthday, pal!
Jake? Is that you?
I can't see.
Right. That's because...
I'm blind!
Jake, I'm blind on my birthday!
No, dude, you're blindfolded.
- Oh.
- Keep the blindfold on.
I've got a surprise for you.
Surprise!
Orange blindfold?
That is a surprise!
That's not the surprise.
This is.
You got me a train?
Thank you, Jake!
This isn't the gift.
Huh?
We have to take the train
to get to the gift.
Oh.
Almost as cool as a free train.
Eh.
I'll go get the tickets.
Okay.
Hey, Mr. Conductor!
It's my birthday!
Oh?
Climb aboard my
train, little boy.
You're my new friend.
All aboard!
This is gonna be the
best birthday ever.
I'm gonna go grab a schedule.
Whoa!
Oh, t-terribly sorry, Colonel.
Oh, oh, well, that's all right.
Just don't let it happen again.
Sorry about that, folks.
We are approaching
Gumball Gulch now.
The ride's gonna
get a little bumpy
until we reach the straightaway,
so you might want to buckle up.
Found a schedule.
Great.
Now find your seatbelt.
Geez Louise.
Uh, s-sorry about that, Colonel.
B-Beg your pardon.
Oh, sorry.
Uh... whoa!
Ugh! Aah!
Colonel, I am so sorry.
Hey, we're in the straightaway.
Ooh, I want to see.
I'm gonna kill you!
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
A skeleton.
Is he going to be okay, Dr.
Donut?
He doesn't look good.
Hey, man, this is
kind of a bad scene.
Maybe we should get
off this train
and hoof it to your surprise.
Are you kidding?
It's a murder
mystery on a train,
and we're gonna solve it.
All right.
What do you think, Dr.
Donut? Any clues?
Hmm.
I think it was the
guy who screamed,
"I'm gonna kill you."
Uh, no, no, it... it...
it wasn't me.
I swear!
Passengers, passengers,
I don't think it was
Colonel Candycorn.
Oh, well, well, thank you.
No, in murder mysteries,
it's never the first
person you think of...
Never, ever.
So, who do you think it is?
Colonel, do you have any
enemies on this train?
Well, uh... well, just one.
And his or her name is...
See?
I knew it wasn't him.
But now we have to figure
out who his enemy is.
It could be anybody.
It could even be you.
Yes, it could, except
I didn't do it.
But we don't know that.
You singled me out to take
suspicion off yourself.
Are you Colonel
Candycorn's enemy?
What? No.
I was just trying to join
in on the conversation.
Suspect numero uno!
Rat traps.
I really thought I
was on to something.
Now, I know this is
gonna sound crazy,
but what about the conductor?
No, it's definitely not him.
Aw. Why not?
Because he's weird and creepy,
and you never suspect
the creepy guy
because it's too obvious.
Whatever, man.
I'm gonna go sit and
look at the schedule.
We're running out of suspects.
And we're running out of time.
Attention.
Attention, passengers.
Gnarly.
Yeah. Hi. It's me...
the conductor.
Anyway, I couldn't
help overhearing
that someone here thinks
I'm weird and creepy.
And, you know, I'm not
weird and creepy.
I'm cool and awesome.
Happy birthday, Finn.
Hey, Jake?
Yeah?
The conductor was just here,
and he was weirder and
creepier than before.
What?! No way.
He was cool and awesome.
Anyway, it's still not him.
No, the murderer is
right here among us.
Isn't that right, doctor?
You think it was me?
When Candycane guy was murdered,
you diverted suspicion
towards Colonel Candycorn,
then killed him to
protect your alibi.
Are you kidding?
Dude, I think you're way off.
Am I? Or am I way on?
Son of a...
My hunches aren't
getting me anywhere.
The killer is
laughing at us, Jake.
What do you think we should do?
Hmm.
We need hard evidence.
Ha!
A basket of eggs,
fish, and cabbage.
It's a receipt from an
earlier train ride,
from another train.
Jake, I found a book.
It's a dictionary.
It's sheet music!
It doesn't make any sense to me.
Me neither.
Maybe the murderer is
just too smart for us.
Yes! Jake, that's it.
It's all so clear now.
Gather everyone in the caboose,
and I will reveal a murderer.
You're the only
remaining passengers,
so the murderer is
in this caboose.
Let me explain how I know
who the murderer is.
I saw Pineapple Guy skim
through the sheet music,
sheet music to a song
that's very special
to Lollipop Girl,
a song that reminds
her of Ice Cream Guy.
Before Colonel Candycorn died,
Dr. Ice Cream was in
possession of a basket
of cabbage, fish, and eggs.
And you, Pineapple Guy,
have cabbage bits on your socks.
And you, Chocolate Bar Guy...
Does this dictionary
look familiar,
a dictionary which happens
to contain the words
"rid," "guests," "at once."
But the real murderer is
someone no one suspects.
The real murderer is...
No one was the murderer?
The conductor's
still on the train.
Oh, yeah. He did it.
Yay! You did it! You
solved it, Finn!
I knew it... because
he's creepy.
What?! Hmph.
I know... you knew he was
the murderer all along.
I couldn't have done
it without you,
you, you, you.
Thank you.
We make a great team, pal.
You feel kind of bony.
Aah!
Jake?
No!
Hey.
How could you murder all
those candy people?
And you murdered
Jake on my birthday!
Yes, and you're next.
Wrong.
Grr!
Hunh!
Unh!
Mnh!
No!!
Ah!
Unh!
I'm coming for you!
Unh!
Ugh!
This is for Jake!
Hunh!
Unh!
Hyah!
You're going down,
or both of us are going down.
My birthday wish is vengeance!
Happy birthday to me!
Wait!
Y-You're alive!
You were the conductor
the whole time?
Yep.
You were so busy
focused on the murders
that you never even noticed.
The skeletons were
the hardest part.
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
It was all an elaborate setup
for your birthday present.
So nobody was murdered?
Nope, not unless you count
the train's control panel.
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Dude, open your eyes.
Hey, we're alive!
♪ ...to you ♪
Wow.
This is the best birthday ever.
Thanks, Jake.
You deserve it, buddy,
'cause you're a great friend.
I think my favorite part
was landing on the gelatin.
That must have taken
forever to plan.
Nope.
That part was a total accident.
Oh.
So we could have...
- Died horribly?
Yes.
Happy birthday, pal!