According to Jim (2001–2009): Season 7, Episode 8 - The Rendezvous - full transcript

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---
ALL RIGHT, KIDS.

SPECIAL TREAT
ON THE BREAKFAST MENU...

COLD CEREAL
OF YOUR CHOICE.

I'LL TAKE SWEETIE PUFFS.
ADMIRAL MUNCH.

COCOA BULLETS.

COCOA BULLETS. ALL RIGHT,
LET'S SEE WHAT WE GOT HERE.

AND RAISIN BRAN IT IS.

ALL RIGHT, ENJOY.

I THINK
THIS MILK EXPIRED ALREADY.

NAH, THOSE DATES
ARE JUST A SCAM,

JUST LIKE
KYLE'S COUGH MEDICINE.



I SLEPT FOR THREE DAYS.

YEAH, BUT YOU
DIDN'T COUGH ONCE, DID YA?

NO, YOU SEE,
THESE DATES ON THE MILK CARTONS

ARE CREATED
BY THE DAIRY LOBBY.

THEY WANT TO SCARE MOMMIES
INTO THROWING 'EM OUT.

BUT WE'RE NOT
GONNA FALL FOR THAT, ARE WE?

(children) NO!

WE'RE NOT
GONNA FALL FOR THAT!

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT, SPECIAL TREAT
ON THE BREAKFAST MENU...

COTTAGE CHEESE!

♪♪♪

HEY, ANDY.

HEY, JIM.



WERE YOU WONDERING
HOW MANY TIMES

I HAD SEX TODAY
WITH MY NEW GIRLFRIEND?

(makes cranking sound)

ANDY, I AM SITTING HERE

FOLDING
LITTLE CHILDREN'S UNDERPANTS.

OH, JIM, YOU WANT TO TALK
UNDERPANTS, MAN?

I SAW SOME TODAY,
OFF OF SOMEONE WHO WASN'T ME.

WANNA KNOW
HOW MANY TIMES I SAW IT?

CHICK-A, CHICK-A,
COME ON, BABY.

COME ON, BABY. BING!

AND FOR A STALLION
NAMED ANDY,

THAT'S CALLED THE TRIFECTA.

COME ON, ANDY, WITH THE KIND
OF GIRLS YOU GO OUT WITH,

IT'S CALLED THE IN-FECTA.

NO, NO, NOT MY GIRL.

OH, MAN,
SHE LOVES TO DO IT.

(laughs)

YOU KNOW WHAT "IT" IS,
RIGHT?

YEAH, IT'S THE LAST HALF
OF "VOMIT."

YEAH,
I KNOW WHAT "IT" IS.

"IT" IS WHAT CHERYL AND I
AREN'T DOING

BECAUSE SHE'S IN FLORIDA
TAKING CARE OF YOUR MOTHER,

WHO BROKE HER HIP
DOING "IT" IN THE SHOWER.

WHAT...
NOW THAT IS NOT TRUE.

SHE SLIPPED
AT THE MALL IN ORLANDO.

SHE SLIPPED
OFF HER GARDENER ORLANDO.

(timer beeps)

OH, GOTTA GO.
WHAT'S THAT?

A TIMER. LAST THING MILADY SAID
WAS, "GIVE ME FIVE MINUTES."

AT LEAST I THINK
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.

ENGLISH...
NOT HER STRONG SUIT.

GRACIE AND I ARE DONE
COMPUTER CHATTING WITH MOMMY.

SHE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU.

OH, REALLY?
OH, GREAT, GREAT, GREAT.

HI, CHERYL.
Hey, honey.

I WAS JUST
THINKING ABOUT YOU.

Aw, good things, I hope.

OH, GOOD THINGS,
SOME BAD THINGS,

SOME VERY BAD THINGS.

(laughs)

WHAT DO YOU WANT, A TIP?

COME ON, COME ON.

OH, CHERYL, I AM GOING CRAZY
WITHOUT YOU HERE.

Aw, you miss me?

OH, I MISS SOME PARTS
MORE THAN OTHERS.

Okay, I've got some good news
for you, then.

I talked to Dana,
and she said she'd be willing

to come down to Florida to take
care of Mom so I can come home.

HERE?
WITHIN TOUCHING DISTANCE?

Yes. (laughs)

YOU MEAN A-A HOT NIGHT
OF SEX AND LAUNDRY?

Yes, as long as you're willing
to buy a ticket for Dana,

I can fly home for a night.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

IF YOU COME HOME FOR A NIGHT,
I'LL BUY DANA TWO BUS TICKETS.

Jim...

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
I'LL FLY HER,

BUT YOU GOTTA BRING
YOUR "A" GAME.

All right.
I'm so excited, honey.

I can't wait to see you.

OH, BABY. OH, SAY SOMETHING SEXY
BEFORE YOU LEAVE.

Oh... you know what, honey?

I gotta go.
I gotta go wipe Mom.

SAY IT AGAIN.

Good-bye.

(groans)

HEY, JIM.

TIME TO CHECK THE BOARD.

(makes beeping sounds)

OW! AAH!

AAH!

GET OUT!

GET OUTTA HERE!

HA HA HA!

(all talking at once)

IT'S SO GOOD TO BE HOME.
YEAH.

WOW, WOW, WHAT TIME
IS IT? OKAY, SWEETIE.

OH, MY GOD. IT'S LATE.
IT'S 4:00.

NO.

TIME FOR BED.

BED? MOM, YOU SAID
WE COULD MAKE A CAKE.

OH, I KNOW, SWEETIE,
BUT I AM SO TIRED. (yawns)

OH, OH, OH.

I'M SO TIRED.
DID YOU SEE THAT?

UH, YOU GOTTA
UNDERSTAND, KIDS,

YOU KNOW,
MOMMY'S BEEN IN FLORIDA.

YEAH. THAT'S, LIKE,
15 HOURS LATER.

OH, SO MUCH LATER. AND SHE
NEEDS SLEEP, AND SHE NEEDS IT NOW.

SHE MAY EVEN NEED
TO SLEEP MORE THAN ONCE.

(children) MOMMY! COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON. INTO THE KITCHEN. LET'S GO.

COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON, COME ON, COME ON,

COME ON, COME ON.
COME ON! (all whining at once)

OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU GUYS?
GO INTO THE KITCHEN.

I'LL BE RIGHT IN.
(all) YES!

(Ruby) I WANNA DO THE
SPRINKLES. (Gracie) NO. YES, YOU DO.

NICE MOVE, BABY.

I MEAN, IT'S A LITTLE RISKY
WITH THEM RIGHT BEHIND THE DOOR,

BUT I'M GAME.

COME ON!

YEAH, HONEY, UM,

I NEED YOU TO THINK
ABOUT THIS LIKE CHRISTMAS EVE,

AND YOUR PRESENT
IS RIGHT UNDER THE TREE,

AND YOU JUST HAVE TO WAIT
A LITTLE BIT LONGER. HUH?

YEAH, BUT THE CREATURE'S
STIRRING, HONEY,

AND IT'S NOT A MOUSE.

I KNOW,
I KNOW, HONEY, BUT...

SUGARPLUMS ARE DANCING,
AND THEY'RE NOT IN MY HEAD. YES...

YOU GOT IT? (singsong voice)
MY CHESTNUTS ARE ROASTING.

JIM, THE KIDS REALLY NEED
TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH ME.

FINE.

OKAY. THANK YOU.

THIS IS GONNA BE
A BLUE CHRISTMAS.

OKAY,
I PUT THE KIDS TO BED.

I PUT THE HEAT
ON SUPER HIGH

SO THEY'LL FALL ASLEEP
AND STAY ASLEEP.

WOULD YOU STOP TALKING
AND GET OVER HERE?

CHERYL,
THAT MAKES ME FEEL CHEAP...

AND I LIKE IT!

(laughs)

(sniffs) YOU STILL SMELL
LIKE CAKE. I KNOW.

OH, MY GOD,
THIS IS GONNA BE

THE MOST PASSIONATE
90 SECONDS OF OUR LIVES.

MOM? OH, GOOD,
YOU'RE STILL UP.

I TOTALLY FORGOT TO TELL YOU
THIS GREAT STORY.

IT'S ABOUT THIS GIRL WHO'S GOT
THE SAME COAT AS GRACIE.

NO, LET ME TELL THAT STORY.

IT'S ABOUT A GIRL WHO HAS
THE SAME COAT AS GRACIE.

NOW GOOD NIGHT.

IT WAS SO FUNNY.
SHOVE OVER, DADDY.

OKAY,
SO THERE WAS THIS GIRL,

AND SHE ASKED GRACIE
WHERE SHE GOT HER JACKET.

AND GRACIE WAS LIKE,
"UM, I DON'T REMEMBER."

ARE YOU TELLING
THE COAT STORY?

'CAUSE THAT IS MY STORY.

YOU TELL IT WRONG.

YOU'RE MISSING
THE GOOD PART.

I THINK I'M MISSING
THE GOOD PART HERE.

OKAY, SO WE WERE
ON THE BUS.

DAD, MOVE.
AAH!

ALL RIGHT,
SO WE WERE ON THE BUS,

AND THIS GIRL SITS DOWN.

SO WE'RE LIKE,
"UM, I LIKE YOUR JACKET."

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
THIS... THIS WAS A MONDAY.

NO, NO,
IT WAS A TUESDAY.

NO, IT WAS A MONDAY.

NO, IT WAS A TUESDAY, BECAUSE
THEY SERVED OATMEAL COOKIES,

AND THEY ONLY SERVE THOSE
ON TUESDAYS. SUMMARIZE.

(Ruby and Gracie speaking
at once) SUMMARIZE.

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

NO, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

(laughs) BLAH, BLAH...
(laughs) BLAH, BLAH...

SHE SHOWS UP,

AND WE CAN TELL
THAT SHE PAINTED HER BUTTONS.

SO WE TEASED HER...
UNTIL SHE CRIED.

IT WAS AWESOME!
YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN THERE.

OH.
AWESOME STORY!

ISN'T IT?
YEAH.

YEAH, WELL, I MEAN, I GOT
A LITTLE CONFUSED IN SOME PARTS,

BUT THEN YOU REPEATED IT
THREE OR FOUR TIMES.

YEAH, YOU KNOW, MY
FAVORITE PART... HUH?

WAS THE END.

OH, THE END WAS GREAT!
(laughs)

UH-HUH, YEAH.
NIGHTY-NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT NOW, GIRLS.

LOVE YOU.
COME ON.

SLEEP WELL.

I MISS MOMMY.
CAN I SLEEP IN YOUR BED?

US, TOO.
YEAH! SLEEPOVER!

SLEEPOVER!
I CALL MIDDLE!

(children speaking at once)

NO, I WANT TO BE
NEXT TO MOM.

I'M SORRY, HONEY.

WOULD YOU TURN DOWN
THE HEAT?

THE HEAT WENT DOWN
45 MINUTES AGO.

(whispering) CHERYL.

THIS IS OUR CHANCE.

I THINK THEY'RE ASLEEP.

(whispering)
I THINK SO, TOO.

WHAT DO YOU GUYS
WANT TO DO?

I MISS MOMMY THE MOST.

NO, I MISS HER THE MOST.
I BARELY GOT TO SEE HER.

WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?!

YOU GUYS HOGGED HER
THE WHOLE WEEKEND!

SHE'S OUR MOMMY,
NOT YOURS.

I KNEW HER FIRST.

NO, YOU DIDN'T!
YES, I DID!

DAD! KYLE! I'M TIRED.
LET'S GO TO BED.

OH, NOW YOU WANNA
GO TO BED!

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

HELLO, NEIGHBOR.

OH, I NEED TO BORROW
A CUP OF CHEWABLE VITAMINS.

SEEMS I'VE DEPLETED
MY NATURAL FLUIDS.

ANDY, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?

WHAT ARE YOU WALKING AROUND
IN A ROBE FOR?

AH, CLOTHES ARE FOR GUYS
WHO AREN'T GETTING ANY.

AND I SEE
YOU ARE VERY WELL-DRESSED.

ANDY, ANDY,
I'M GOING CRAZY HERE.

I DIDN'T GET ONE MINUTE
ALONE WITH CHERYL.

NOW I'M NOT
GONNA SEE HER FOR WEEKS.

DO SOMETHING
TO GET MY MIND OFF IT.

AW, JEEZ, ANDY!

THAT TAKE YOUR MIND
OFF OF IT?

NOT COMPLETELY.

YOU AND YOUR SISTER
HAVE THE SAME CUP SIZE.

THIS SUCKS!

(telephone rings)

(growls)
(ring)

HELLO?

HEY, HONEY, IT'S ME.
THERE'S BAD WEATHER IN ORLANDO.

OH, THAT'S HORRIBLE TO HEAR.
I'M SORRY.

NO, HONEY, IT'S GOOD.

THEY'RE DIVERTING US
BACK TO CHICAGO,

AND I'M GONNA HAVE
A 3-HOUR LAYOVER.

OH, WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT'S A NICE AIRPORT.

WHY DON'T YOU GO
TO LOST AND FOUND

AND PICK UP A BIRTHDAY PRESENT
FOR GRACIE?

OKAY. LET ME SAY
THE IMPORTANT WORD AGAIN...

LAYOVER.

RIGHT. YOU'RE ON LAYOVER.

LAYOVER?!
Right.

NOT A HOLD-YOUR-HANDS-OVER.

NO. (laughs)

OH, BABY! ALL RIGHT,
I'M COMING TO THE AIRPORT.

OKAY, HONEY, GET A HOTEL ROOM,
AND A NICE ONE...

NOT BY THE HOUR.

OR HOW ABOUT THE MINIVAN,

AND HOPE NOBODY'S IN
SHORT-TERM PARKING? JIM.

ALL RIGHT. FINE, FINE.

I'LL BE THERE IN A LITTLE BIT.
ALL RIGHT. BYE.

ANDY, ANDY, YOU HAVE GOT TO
STAY HERE AND WATCH THE KIDS,

BECAUSE I'M GONNA GO
AND MAKE LOVE ON YOUR SISTER.

JIM, JIM, JIM, JIM.

I KNOW IT'S BEEN A WHILE
SINCE YOU'VE BEEN IN THE SADDLE,

UM, SO IF YOU NEED
A LITTLE EXTRA STAYING POWER,

MAYBE THAT'LL HELP.

ANDY, YOU'RE A GOOD FRIEND.

THERE'S ICE
IN THE FREEZER FOR THAT.

HERE'S YOUR BOARDING PASS.

YOU'RE GONNA GO THROUGH SECURITY
AROUND THE CORNER,

AND THERE'S THE CAPTAIN'S CLUB.
HAVE A NICE FLIGHT.

NEXT.

SIR, YOUR BABY.

NEXT.

UH, EXCUSE ME.

UM, CAN YOU TELL ME

WHEN FLIGHT 38 FROM ORLANDO
IS GOING TO ARRIVE?

OH, I'D BE HAPPY
TO HELP YOU WITH THAT.

AH, YES. IT'S DELAYED.
SEE HOW IT SAYS THAT HERE,

TO YOUR LEFT
AND RIGHT BEHIND YOU?

CRAP. DELAYED? HOW LONG?

OH, I CAN BE OF SERVICE
TO YOU AGAIN

BY CHECKING
THE SCREENS HERE,

TO YOUR LEFT
AND RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

I JUST SHELLED OUT
FOR A HOTEL ROOM.

NOW WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO DO?

IF YOU'D LIKE SOME PAMPHLETS ON
WHAT TO DO IN THE CHICAGO AREA,

THERE ARE
INFORMATION KIOSKS LOCATED

AT BOTH ENDS OF THE TERMINAL
AND RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

LOOK, I AM JUST TRYING TO FIND
SOME ALONE TIME WITH MY WIFE.

BUT IT LOOKS LIKE WE'VE ONLY GOT
AN HOUR TO MAKE "IT" HAPPEN.

OH, YOU'D LIKE TO KNOW WHERE
TO HAVE SEX IN THE AIRPORT.

I'D BE HAPPY
TO HELP YOU WITH THAT.

DO YOU OR YOUR WIFE
HAVE ANY DISABILITIES?

NO.

ARE EITHER OF YOU MEMBERS
OF THE ARMED SERVICES,

THE AUTO CLUB, OR TRAVELING
WITH A SMALL CHILD?

NO, NO, I JUST...

IN THE EVENT
OF A WATER LANDING,

WOULD YOU NEED SPECIAL
ASSISTANCE? WATER LANDING?

YES.

(lowers voice)
IS THAT DIRTY?

OH, YES.

NO.

NO.

ALL RIGHT, MAY I RECOMMEND
THE NORTHWEST CORNER

OF OUR CAPTAIN'S CLUB?
IT FEATURES A LEATHER SOFA,

A DECENT VIEW OF THE BIG SCREEN
AND FREE DRINKS.

REALLY?
MM-HMM.

UH, CAN I GET A GAME
ON THE BIG SCREEN?

(typing on keyboard)

DONE.

FANTASTIC. YOU'VE BEEN
A REAL HELP. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

WELL, OF COURSE,
NOW ONLY TICKETED PASSENGERS

CAN GO THROUGH SECURITY.

OH, GREAT.
I GOT A HOTEL ROOM I CAN'T USE,

NOW I'M GONNA BUY A
TICKET THAT I CAN'T USE. MM.

ALL RIGHT, WHEN'S
THE NEXT AVAILABLE FLIGHT?

I'D BE HAPPY TO HELP YOU
WITH THAT TODAY, SIR,

BY CHECKING THE SCREENS HERE,
TO YOUR LEFT AND...

RIGHT BEHIND ME.
RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

ALL RIGHT, GIVE ME
A TICKET TO, UH, CINCINNATI.

OKAY.

HOW DO YOU SPELL
CINCINNATI?

WELL, I CAN HELP YOU
WITH THAT...

IF YOU LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT,

TO YOUR LEFT
AND RIGHT BEHIND ME.

UH, CHERYL, CHERYL,
I SAW ON THE MONITOR

THAT YOUR FLIGHT
HAS LANDED.

SO LOOK, WE'RE NOT GONNA HAVE
THAT MUCH TIME,

SO WHEN YOU GET THIS MESSAGE,

MEET ME IN THE CAPTAIN'S CLUB,
ALL RIGHT?

AND, UH,
DON'T BE SURPRISED

IF I BRING IN
A WATER LANDING.

(Latin music playing)

HEY, I SEE YOU'RE INTO
THE SAME STUFF I AM.

HARD TO RESIST, HUH?

DANG. I'M OUT OF PAPER.

HEY, BUDDY,
CAN YOU HELP ME OUT HERE?

I'M HAVING TROUBLE
FINISHING.

COME ON. GIVE ME A HAND,
WILL YA?

COME ON.
DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING.

COME ON.
I'D DO THE SAME FOR YOU.

HELLO, OFFICER.

WAS I SPEEDING?

YOU'RE UNDER ARREST
FOR LEWD CONDUCT.

WHAT, YOU WANT ME
TO DO A COURTESY FLUSH?

SIR, JUST STEP OUT
OF THE STALL.

WELL, I'M STILL
GONNA NEED THAT PAPER.

ALL RIGHT, PALLY,
ASSUME THE POSITION.

YOU GOT ANY DRUGS
OR WEAPONS ON YOU?

NO. HAVE YOU BEEN
DRINKING TODAY?

NO.

ARE YOU A MEMBER
OF THE AUTO CLUB?

WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO
WITH ANYTHING?

WELL, YOU GET 10% OFF
ANY MISDEMEANORS OR CITATIONS,

AND THE FINE FOR SOLICITING WOULD
HAVE TO BE... WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU THINK I'M TRYING
TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU?

LOOK, WHEN I WANT
TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU,

BELIEVE ME,
YOU'RE GONNA KNOW IT.

YOU TAPPED YOUR FOOT, SIR.

THAT'S A NOTORIOUS SIGNAL
FOR BATHROOM SEX.

THEN YOUR FOOT GRAZED MINE.
LOOK, I AM NOT GAY. I AM A MARRIED MAN.

AND I'M
AN AVID RACQUETBALL PLAYER,

BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
I NEVER GO SWIMMING.

I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOU.

SWIMMING IS GAY.

OH, MY GOD.
SWIMMING IS GAY?

WHO KNOWS?
YOU'RE THE EXPERT.

NO, NO, NO, NO, YOU GOT ME
ALL WRONG HERE, MAN. COME ON.

OH, SO YOU'RE NOT PLANNING ON
HAVING SEX IN THE AIRPORT TODAY?

WELL, YES, I WAS,

BUT... BUT NOT WITH YOU,

WITH... WITH A HOT BLONDE,
MY WIFE.

YOU KNOW, SIR,
THAT'S STILL A CRIME.

OH, N-NOTHING FUNKY,
YOU KNOW,

JUST NORMAL, REGULAR...
NO WATER LANDING.

(cell phone rings)

COME ON, MAN. YOU GOTTA GIVE ME
A BREAK HERE. HELLO?

WHERE WERE YOU?

I WENT TO THE CAPTAIN'S CLUB
AND LOOKED EVERYWHERE.

OH, HAVING A PROBLEM
IN THE BATHROOM.

OH, JIM, JUST THROW OUT YOUR
UNDERWEAR LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO.

CHERYL...

CHERYL, WHERE...
WHERE ARE YOU?

I'M ON THE PLANE.
I DIDN'T WANT TO MISS MY FLIGHT.

WE'RE TAKING OFF IN TEN
MINUTES. NO, CHERYL, CHERYL...

OH, SWEETHEART, I'LL CALL YOU
FROM FLORIDA. I LOVE YOU.

CHERYL, CHERYL, WAIT, WAIT,
WAIT, WAIT! STALL, STALL!

(groans)

HEY, LISTEN, MAN,
YOU HAVE GOT TO BELIEVE ME.

I HAVEN'T HAD SEX WITH MY WIFE
IN OVER TWO MONTHS.

SHE'S BEEN DOWN IN FLORIDA
WATCHING HER MOM

WHO HAD A BROKEN HIP.
I'M WATCHING THE KIDS,

AND MY BROTHER-IN-LAW'S
GETTING IT MORE THAN ME.

AND IF I DON'T SEE HER SOON,

I MIGHT NOT SEE HER
IN ANOTHER FEW WEEKS.

SO WITH ALL THAT PRESSURE,
YOU FIGURED,

WHY NOT GO
TO THE AIRPORT BATHROOM

AND BLOW OFF
A LITTLE STEAM?

LOOK AT ME.

IS THERE ANYTHING ABOUT ME
THAT IS EVEN REMOTELY GAY?

WELL, I'M NOT A FAN
OF THAT JACKET.

MY WIFE BOUGHT IT FOR ME.

I TOLD HER
NOT TO GET THIS COAT.

ALL RIGHT.
GIVE ME AN HONEST ANSWER.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME
YOU SAW A GROWN MAN NAKED?

TWO HOURS AGO,

BUT IT WAS
MY BROTHER-IN-LAW.

HE WAS DOING ME A FAVOR.

(woman) ALL PASSENGERS
FOR FLIGHT 38 TO ORLANDO,

FINAL BOARDING CALL.

OKAY, THERE'S STILL TIME,
THERE'S STILL TIME.

COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON.

WHAT CAN I DO
TO HURRY THIS THING ALONG?

YOU ADMIT TO SOLICITING SEX
FROM A MAN IN A PUBLIC RESTROOM.

GUILTY AS CHARGED.

AND, UH, THAT'S MY PHONE NUMBER.
I'M NOT ALWAYS WORKING.

CHERYL.

JIM?

YOUR IN-FLIGHT SNACK
HAS ARRIVED.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

WELL, I BOUGHT A PLANE TICKET,
A COUPLE HUNDRED BUCKS.

BUT WHEN I GET TO FLORIDA,
I GOTTA TURN AROUND

AND COME BACK AND GO TO CHICAGO
FOR A COURT DATE.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU'D GO TO ALL THIS TROUBLE

JUST TO HAVE SEX WITH ME.

CHERYL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT'S MORE THAN THE SEX.

I MEAN, I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE
TO STARE INTO YOUR EYES

OR TOUCH YOUR HAIR

OR HOLD YOUR HAND
AND JUST SAY NOTHING.

OH.

I MISS YOU, TOO.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

WHAT?

I BELIEVE OUR MEMBERSHIP TO
THE MILE-HIGH CLUB HAS EXPIRED.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO RE-UP?

IS THERE
A MEMBERSHIP FEE?

SO FAR, 3,600 BUCKS.

BUT, BABY,
YOU ARE WORTH IT.

AW, COME HERE. MM.

EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME.

100 BUCKS,
AND I'LL GIVE YOU THE SEAT.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GIVE YOU 100 BUCKS. MOVE.

(giggles)