A Moody Christmas (2012): Season 1, Episode 1 - Separate Seats - full transcript
Translate: Shuter
WOMAN ON LOUDSPEAKER:
Final call for Flight 512
departing London on its way
to Sydney.
Hey, Phoebe. It's Dan.
I'm at the airport, so call me back.
Pheebs, seriously, where are you?
I'm almost at the counter.
Ring me back.
You heading home for the holidays?
Ah, yeah.
Thought so. Spot the accent.
Right.
I've got a bit of an ear
for accents.
In fact, I'm a bit of an amateur
accent enthusiast.
Oh, right.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm heading down... down under.
Right. That's good.
I'm going to Sydney. I'm being met
by a good friend of mine, Wendy.
Met her online. Look, there she is.
What do you think?
Oh, wow. She's...
No, this one. This one here.
Oh yeah, she's lovely too.
Yeah, isn't she lovely?
Doesn't ring any bells?
Ah, no.
No, it's a big place, Sydney,
isn't it?
Right.
Over four million inhabitants.
Phoebe, there you are.
What are you doing? Where's...
where's your luggage?
I'm not coming.
Dan, where do you see our
relationship going?
Ah, Sydney via Dubai.
This is just a joke to you,
isn't it?
What P I mean, we're not even
sitting together.
I told you, Pheebs,
I could only get the single tickets.
Yeah, and you're fine with it.
Look, you keep everybody
at arms' length. Even me.
Pheebs, I stayed here for you.
You just want me to hold your hand
so you don't have to get through
another Christmas...
Oh come on, that's unfair.
I... I... booked the tickets
so you could come and see
where I'm from.
I wanted you to meet my family
and my brother
and that's... (Chuckles)
That's a joke!
Of course. It's just a card.
I was being...
Self-deprecating.
Yes.
Well, it's the Australian
characteristic -
It's a defence mechanism,
quite often. Appreciate it.
Do we have to do this right now?
They're calling us through
and maybe...
Look, I don't know what you want,
Daniel.
You know what? I
am sick of looking at you
every time we make love and you...
you're just giving me
these blank eyes.
You just don't have to yell...
I don't know what you're thinking.
I appreciate...
I can't do it anymore!
Want to shift your bag up a bit?
Sure.
Goodbye, Daniel.
Oh come on. Phoebe!
Phoebe, wait!
Can you just come anyway?
Yeah, come on. It's Christmas.
Ohh, never mind.
At least you've got a spare seat.
You could swap that for an upgrade.
Oh no, no, internet fares. Not much
you could do with those, is there?
Except obviously stretch out a bit
'cause you've got a spare seat.
We're not sitting together.
They're separate seats.
WOMAN: Next, please.
It's a nice card.
Thanks.
Next!
♪ Christmas time
Oh, Christmas time
♪ The end of the year
♪ Boys and girls are in the park
♪ Smiles ear to ear
♪ Gather 'round the Christmas tree
♪ Gifts for everyone
♪ Merry time for you and me
now Christmas has come. ♪
You may as well take it down, Dad.
She's, um...
She's not coming.
Son!
I nearly killed myself
putting that up there.
Sorry. I...
Oh, your mother's idea.
Maree! She's not even comin' now!
I never asked for a banner, Dad.
You stay away a year,
you get a banner. Welcome home.
Thanks.
And happy Christmas.
You too.
Merry Christmas, son.
So where is Phoebe?
Ah, her grandmother got a bit sick,
so she's um, yeah...
Oh, how awful!
You could have given us a call, Dan.
She didn't plan to get sick. We were
looking forward to meeting her.
Yeah, I know. It's not coming down
now, I can tell you.
What's wrong with your eyes?
Look like you've been crying.
No, it's just...
Hey?
I've been on a plane for 24 hours,
Dad, OK?
I can't believe
you're using my old suitcase.
Where's Sean?
Yeah, it still works.
Didn't he pick you up?
Give it a rest, Kev.
(Snores)
(Loud horn)
Merry Christmas.
Thanks for picking me up.
What time is it?
It's 8am.
What, did you get in early?
No, 6am, Sean, like I told you.
You never said six.
Yes, I did. You were writing it on
your hand. Do you remember?
Says nine.
Hey, come here,
come here, come here.
It's good to have you back.
Merry Christmas.
(Gasps)
That's for the air horn.
Check it out.
Check it out.
I got 'em restrung. Jam later.
Ah yeah, maybe.
Definitely. Dan?
Darl, leave it to me for Chrissake.
I don't want you lifting things.
I thought you were quitting today.
No, New Year's I said.
Good to see the shower still sucks.
You used to run a shower business.
Can't you fix it?
That was executive spas.
I didn't touch showers.
That was years ago.
I thought it was last year.
I don't think so.
Oh God. I wish he'd take
that stupid sign down.
I wish he'd take the sign down.
I wish he'd take the sign down.
That's not...
Ever hear yourself?
What happened to her, anyway?
Phoebe?
Oh, her grandma got sick
so she couldn't make it out.
Some kind of respiratory thing.
She dumped ya?
At the airport.
What a dog.
Can you just not say anything?
I just...
I could do without the third degree.
Sean! When are ya gonna finish
this grass?
I told you, my mower's being fixed!
Well, use the whipper snipper!
Oh, thanks Doctor Green Thumbs.
Do you run a gardening company?
No, I do.
Mate, it's her loss. I don't need
to run a bloody gardening comp
You can't do a whole yard
with a whipper snipper, ya maniac!
No-one does a Christmas like us.
So my present's a little
unusual this year,
but I know it's something
you're all going to love.
Oh, group present. Awesome.
Where is it?
I'll be right back.
OK, Merry Christmas everyone.
There we go. There you go, Rog.
Spas and Showers?
Let me see that.
You gave me that one last year.
I'll take a 'my son's sucks at
business' mug if you've got one.
Ah no, but I think I've got an
'old man scared of new ideas'
fridge magnet in here.
30 years, Moody Air.
Let me know when you make one.
At least I give presents, Dad.
Yeah, mine's coming.
Don't you worry about that.
Merry Christmas!
I'm pregnant!
(Screams)
Is that piss? Congratulations!
Is that piss?
Are you serious?
That's your present?
A stick with piss on it? Don't!
(All chatter)
(Doorbell rings)
I'll get it.
Hi.
Hi, I'm Cora.
Oh, sorry.
Um, you probably want some change
then? There you go. Merry Christmas.
Oh no, no, no,
I'm Cora, Hayden's girlfriend.
He's just parking.
Right. Sorry.
Um, Hayden's your girlfriend.
That's right. I did know that.
Um, it was the... sorry, the shirt.
Red Cross, yeah. I get it.
It's probably a really expensive
designer or something, is it?
No, no, no, it's Red Cross.
I volunteer there.
Oh, wow. Great. Good for you.
That's excellent.
Are you working today?
Yeah. No. No, not officially.
But you... took my money.
Well, you donated it, so...
Yeah, but you...
you just said that you're not...
I said not officially.
You know, I'm like an off-duty cop.
You know, if he sees a crime,
he can't just
turn a blind eye to it.
Sure.
There he is!
My long lost cousin!
Haydo, how are ya? Good, mate.
Merry Ch
So you met Cora?
Yes, yeah.
I did, in her Red Cross outfit.
Ah, mate, that's one of her
own designs. Handmade.
I think it's just the colour,
babe, you know?
Dan? I know it seems like work
for you, but do you mind?
Um, sure.
Thanks, darling.
Dan, can you have a look
at my camera?
Ah, just give us a sec, Roger.
It's a funny story, actually.
I met Dashenka at work.
Customs, you know, at the airport.
Yeah. Bug-a-lugs here
tries to slip one by me.
A suitcase full of snakes.
Dead ones, on ice.
A delicacy in Russia.
Haydos!
I'm not investing in your
lawn business, Sean.
No, I got a brand new one.
Funereal fireworks. Sorry, guys.
Give us a smile. There's two
certainties in life. Death and...
WOMAN ON LOUDSPEAKER:
Final call for Flight 512
departing London on its way
to Sydney.
Hey, Phoebe. It's Dan.
I'm at the airport, so call me back.
Pheebs, seriously, where are you?
I'm almost at the counter.
Ring me back.
You heading home for the holidays?
Ah, yeah.
Thought so. Spot the accent.
Right.
I've got a bit of an ear
for accents.
In fact, I'm a bit of an amateur
accent enthusiast.
Oh, right.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm heading down... down under.
Right. That's good.
I'm going to Sydney. I'm being met
by a good friend of mine, Wendy.
Met her online. Look, there she is.
What do you think?
Oh, wow. She's...
No, this one. This one here.
Oh yeah, she's lovely too.
Yeah, isn't she lovely?
Doesn't ring any bells?
Ah, no.
No, it's a big place, Sydney,
isn't it?
Right.
Over four million inhabitants.
Phoebe, there you are.
What are you doing? Where's...
where's your luggage?
I'm not coming.
Dan, where do you see our
relationship going?
Ah, Sydney via Dubai.
This is just a joke to you,
isn't it?
What P I mean, we're not even
sitting together.
I told you, Pheebs,
I could only get the single tickets.
Yeah, and you're fine with it.
Look, you keep everybody
at arms' length. Even me.
Pheebs, I stayed here for you.
You just want me to hold your hand
so you don't have to get through
another Christmas...
Oh come on, that's unfair.
I... I... booked the tickets
so you could come and see
where I'm from.
I wanted you to meet my family
and my brother
and that's... (Chuckles)
That's a joke!
Of course. It's just a card.
I was being...
Self-deprecating.
Yes.
Well, it's the Australian
characteristic -
It's a defence mechanism,
quite often. Appreciate it.
Do we have to do this right now?
They're calling us through
and maybe...
Look, I don't know what you want,
Daniel.
You know what? I
am sick of looking at you
every time we make love and you...
you're just giving me
these blank eyes.
You just don't have to yell...
I don't know what you're thinking.
I appreciate...
I can't do it anymore!
Want to shift your bag up a bit?
Sure.
Goodbye, Daniel.
Oh come on. Phoebe!
Phoebe, wait!
Can you just come anyway?
Yeah, come on. It's Christmas.
Ohh, never mind.
At least you've got a spare seat.
You could swap that for an upgrade.
Oh no, no, internet fares. Not much
you could do with those, is there?
Except obviously stretch out a bit
'cause you've got a spare seat.
We're not sitting together.
They're separate seats.
WOMAN: Next, please.
It's a nice card.
Thanks.
Next!
♪ Christmas time
Oh, Christmas time
♪ The end of the year
♪ Boys and girls are in the park
♪ Smiles ear to ear
♪ Gather 'round the Christmas tree
♪ Gifts for everyone
♪ Merry time for you and me
now Christmas has come. ♪
You may as well take it down, Dad.
She's, um...
She's not coming.
Son!
I nearly killed myself
putting that up there.
Sorry. I...
Oh, your mother's idea.
Maree! She's not even comin' now!
I never asked for a banner, Dad.
You stay away a year,
you get a banner. Welcome home.
Thanks.
And happy Christmas.
You too.
Merry Christmas, son.
So where is Phoebe?
Ah, her grandmother got a bit sick,
so she's um, yeah...
Oh, how awful!
You could have given us a call, Dan.
She didn't plan to get sick. We were
looking forward to meeting her.
Yeah, I know. It's not coming down
now, I can tell you.
What's wrong with your eyes?
Look like you've been crying.
No, it's just...
Hey?
I've been on a plane for 24 hours,
Dad, OK?
I can't believe
you're using my old suitcase.
Where's Sean?
Yeah, it still works.
Didn't he pick you up?
Give it a rest, Kev.
(Snores)
(Loud horn)
Merry Christmas.
Thanks for picking me up.
What time is it?
It's 8am.
What, did you get in early?
No, 6am, Sean, like I told you.
You never said six.
Yes, I did. You were writing it on
your hand. Do you remember?
Says nine.
Hey, come here,
come here, come here.
It's good to have you back.
Merry Christmas.
(Gasps)
That's for the air horn.
Check it out.
Check it out.
I got 'em restrung. Jam later.
Ah yeah, maybe.
Definitely. Dan?
Darl, leave it to me for Chrissake.
I don't want you lifting things.
I thought you were quitting today.
No, New Year's I said.
Good to see the shower still sucks.
You used to run a shower business.
Can't you fix it?
That was executive spas.
I didn't touch showers.
That was years ago.
I thought it was last year.
I don't think so.
Oh God. I wish he'd take
that stupid sign down.
I wish he'd take the sign down.
I wish he'd take the sign down.
That's not...
Ever hear yourself?
What happened to her, anyway?
Phoebe?
Oh, her grandma got sick
so she couldn't make it out.
Some kind of respiratory thing.
She dumped ya?
At the airport.
What a dog.
Can you just not say anything?
I just...
I could do without the third degree.
Sean! When are ya gonna finish
this grass?
I told you, my mower's being fixed!
Well, use the whipper snipper!
Oh, thanks Doctor Green Thumbs.
Do you run a gardening company?
No, I do.
Mate, it's her loss. I don't need
to run a bloody gardening comp
You can't do a whole yard
with a whipper snipper, ya maniac!
No-one does a Christmas like us.
So my present's a little
unusual this year,
but I know it's something
you're all going to love.
Oh, group present. Awesome.
Where is it?
I'll be right back.
OK, Merry Christmas everyone.
There we go. There you go, Rog.
Spas and Showers?
Let me see that.
You gave me that one last year.
I'll take a 'my son's sucks at
business' mug if you've got one.
Ah no, but I think I've got an
'old man scared of new ideas'
fridge magnet in here.
30 years, Moody Air.
Let me know when you make one.
At least I give presents, Dad.
Yeah, mine's coming.
Don't you worry about that.
Merry Christmas!
I'm pregnant!
(Screams)
Is that piss? Congratulations!
Is that piss?
Are you serious?
That's your present?
A stick with piss on it? Don't!
(All chatter)
(Doorbell rings)
I'll get it.
Hi.
Hi, I'm Cora.
Oh, sorry.
Um, you probably want some change
then? There you go. Merry Christmas.
Oh no, no, no,
I'm Cora, Hayden's girlfriend.
He's just parking.
Right. Sorry.
Um, Hayden's your girlfriend.
That's right. I did know that.
Um, it was the... sorry, the shirt.
Red Cross, yeah. I get it.
It's probably a really expensive
designer or something, is it?
No, no, no, it's Red Cross.
I volunteer there.
Oh, wow. Great. Good for you.
That's excellent.
Are you working today?
Yeah. No. No, not officially.
But you... took my money.
Well, you donated it, so...
Yeah, but you...
you just said that you're not...
I said not officially.
You know, I'm like an off-duty cop.
You know, if he sees a crime,
he can't just
turn a blind eye to it.
Sure.
There he is!
My long lost cousin!
Haydo, how are ya? Good, mate.
Merry Ch
So you met Cora?
Yes, yeah.
I did, in her Red Cross outfit.
Ah, mate, that's one of her
own designs. Handmade.
I think it's just the colour,
babe, you know?
Dan? I know it seems like work
for you, but do you mind?
Um, sure.
Thanks, darling.
Dan, can you have a look
at my camera?
Ah, just give us a sec, Roger.
It's a funny story, actually.
I met Dashenka at work.
Customs, you know, at the airport.
Yeah. Bug-a-lugs here
tries to slip one by me.
A suitcase full of snakes.
Dead ones, on ice.
A delicacy in Russia.
Haydos!
I'm not investing in your
lawn business, Sean.
No, I got a brand new one.
Funereal fireworks. Sorry, guys.
Give us a smile. There's two
certainties in life. Death and...