A Different World (1987–1993): Season 6, Episode 15 - Happy Birthday to Moi - full transcript

Dwayne throws Whitley a surprise party while two students of Hillman College cheat on a test and try to get away with it.

Can't be late, pookie.

I must go educate
tomorrow's leaders.

Go teach the world, baby.

Friday is the birthday dinner

so don't accept dates
from little munchkins.

I remember...
Dinner, the two of us.

So romantic.

And intimate.

Now, it's my birthday.

You know me, Dwayne...
Less is more.

Since when?



Get out of here.

You're so funny.

You ought to be on
def comedy jam.

I'll call Russell
and see what we can do.

Kim.

Kim.

Hey, listen...

Oh!

Don't do that to me.

I added a few more people

I think whitley
would want there.

Wow. That many, huh?

The more people

the more attention for whitley.



I say buy her a mirror
and call it a day.

My baby deserves
this birthday bash.

She'll be so surprised.
I got her thinking

we're having a little
romantic dinner for two.

I'm going to say, "I left
my briefcase at the pit."

She's going to be so surprised.

She'll be like,
"Dwayne, Dwayne, Dwayne!"

£ ooh £

£ I know my parents loved me £

£ stand behind me
come what may £

£ come what may £

£ I realize that I'm ready £

£ I'm ready £

£ 'cause I finally
heard them say £

£ I heard them say £

£ it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ from where you come from £

£ it's a different world £

£ oh, now,
here's our chance to make it £

£ here's our chance £

£ if we focus on our goal £

£ focus on our goal £

£ if you dish it,
we can take it £

£ we can take it £

£ just remember
that you've been told £

£ that it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ oh, it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ from where you come from £

£ it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ from where you come from £

£ it's a different world £

£ from where you come from,
yeah. £

Listen here, mademoiselle.

Je cherche la...

Now, do you see where I'm going?

Chercher la femme.

Mademoiselle,
je cherche le louvre.

C'est de l'autre cote
de la rue, monsieur.

Merci, mademoiselle.

That's how it's supposed to go.

Professor, I'm sorry.

I can't work with these people.

I see that.

Mademoiselle Deveaux,
I suggest you meditate

on the word fraternite.

It means "brotherhood."

Working together,
getting beyond moi.

Oui, madame.

Who will be my next volunteer?

Ow!

Ah, monsieur Walker.

And mademoiselle brown.

Mademoiselle brown.

Now, Terrell

you will be the waiter,
le garcon

and, Charmaine

you shall be the customer.

Fabulous.

Allez-y, les enfants.

Allez.

"Garcon, garcon

"Jay voo-jays man-jeer.

"Bon-jeer, may-dame.

Common tally voss a-jordy?"

Oh!

"Trace bee-yen,
ma-ees jayee fayime."

"Quoi es-kee-koo
voo-drays vows man-jer?"

"Jay va-jays man-jer
UN petit chien."

No! No! No!

No more.

Please, I beg you.

Charmaine, you are not going

to eat a little dog for dinner.

Go to your seats in shame.

C'est une catastrophe.

She told you, girl.

As I return your quizzes,
let me inform you

that your midterm will be
on Friday, and it's oral.

Please make individual
appointments with me.

How can I get a "d"
if you're grading on a curve?

Because mademoiselle Deveaux
got a perfect score.

It's lonely at the top.

Dismissed.

What did you get, Charmaine?

There's a "c"
where my grade should be.

Professor,
there's a misprint on my test.

Face la musique, cherie.

You received a "c,"
and may I suggest

that Mr. Walker and you
find a tutor toute de suite.

A "c"?

I'm having breathing troubles.

It's just a "c."

I have a 4.0
to protect, Gina.

Me too.

Not anymore.

Dwayne wants us here at 7:30.

So don't be late
and bring a gift.

And don't buy anything cheap

'cause that's my department.

Darling, one day I look forward

to celebrating
your birthday with you.

You going to throw me a party?

Let's just say
there will be jubilation.

See you after lab, all right?

Ya, mon.

Ah...

May I help you, Ron?

No. Looks like you
got your hands full.

Go ahead, girl.

So are we still on
for tonight, Lena?

Most definitely.

I rented some movies.

They didn't have
beauty and the beast

so I got Beethoven
and home alone.

Why didn't you just
rent Mary poppins?

Just because
we're not getting busy

doesn't mean you have
to hit the kiddie rack.

You want to be alone
in a dark room with me

watching she's gotta have it?

I never saw home alone.

That's what I thought.

Je ne re...

Je ne re...

Is that your mating call,
or do you just got phlegm?

I'm practicing my French,
Mr. Gaines.

Bonjour, Mr. Gaines.

Bonjour right back
to you, frenchy.

Je voudrais UN croissant
et UN jus d'orange.

And what does that mean?

It means she knows French
and we don't.

First time in my life I stink.

Well, I can write it,
just not speak it.

You can just carry
a blackboard around Paris.

Vous est UN jerk.

All right, all right,
girlfriend.

I won't make you beg this time.

Mademoiselle Gina
is available for tutoring

so we can start now.

Me come to you for help
in something scholastic?

Not in this lifetime.

Terrell, I guess it's just me,
you, and your little "d."

Gina, me and my "d" don't need
a tutor with an attitude.

It's just as well, Terrell

because French
is the language of love

which means
you'll never know it.

That means you'll speak it
to anybody.

Okay, Terrell,
for the fifth time

how do you say... "Hat"?

Chat.

No!

That means cat!

I need an aspirin.

Charmaine:
When are you coming back?

Never!

Never?

Jay... jee... joo...

Wait a minute, Jacques!

I'm getting the hang of it!

Jah, jwah... see?!

That's it... jwah-Lee!

In my two years as the president
of the hillman French club

I have never encountered
two such hopeless cases.

The night simply
isn't long enough.

Here's your $20 back.

Bonjour, madame.

Vive la France.

Je m'appelle Charmaine.

Je m'appelle I'm going to fail.

Bonjour, madame.

Je m'appelle I'm going to fail.

Vive la France.

Je m'appelle I'm going to fail.

Bonjour, madame.

Je m'appelle Charmaine.

I'm going to fail je m'appelle.

I'm going to fail.

You too.

We going to fail.

We going to fail.

We going to fail.

Je m'appelle.

We going to fail!

Can you hear me, Brad?

Vern, make baby sounds.

Baa! Baa!

Vern, that sounds like a sheep.

Waah! Waah!

That's good.

I love this baby monitor.

We'll hear Imani's first words

no matter what room we're in.

Come on, man.

Come on, Terrell, stay with me.

Think of your g.P.A.

We've been up all night.

If we knew the questions...

Will she quiz us on vocabulary,
make us recite verbs, what?

I'm ready to pay disguised
tutors to take the test.

That's cheating. It's
despicable and disgusting.

Besides, you'll never find
anybody cute enough to be me.

Is it on?
It's on.

That's right.
I love this.

What's better
than a French tutor?

A baby monitor.

Mutumbo with the slam.

Barkley coming back
with the rebound.

He coming down the court

he fake,
elbow over on the head...

Barkley with three!

What are you doing?!

Watch out, man.

Dwayne, are these
your papers or whitley's?

Whitley's. Why?

I thought the party
was a surprise.

What do you mean?

This looks like the guest list.

In her handwriting.

Whitley's in on
her own surprise party.

Oh, sukie, sukie.

Uh-uh, not this time.

Whitley wants a surprise
for her birthday.

I'm going to give her one.

Hey, how come
I'm not on the list?

I can't cheat.

I don't know
what I was thinking.

You were thinking
about that big, fat "c."

Hey look, it's simple.
Gina comes down the stairs

we drop this in her backpack

off she goes to class

and we trail her
by up to 50 feet...

Instant knowledge
of what's on the test.

I can't do it, Terrell.

Look at this face.

Can't you see it's hurting
my conscience too?

No.

But you'd be better prepared
for a written test, right?

Right. We worked as hard
as two people could.

Gina's from Martinique.

She grew up speaking French.

That's cheating.

Right.

No, no, I can't.

I never have, never will.

We ain't talking
about your sex life.

We're talking about
saving your butt.

Bonjour, mes amis.

Quelle heure est-il, Charmaine?

Yeah, yeah, you look fine.

I asked what time it was.

Ooh.

It's 1:00, Gina.

Time for my exam

and time for you
to drop French, eh?

Gina, I don't blame you
for not wanting to help us

but I just want to put
this ugly incident behind us

and get back to being friends.

That's so touching.

Touching, truly touching

but I can't help you, homey.

Au revoir.

You just did.

Both:
Au revoir.

Okay, kimmie, this is good.

You added the names
to the guest list.

Did you dissuade Dwayne

from getting that
greasy fried chicken?

Yes. He got you
a shrimp platter.

Fresh, not frozen?

I am so sorry
you lassoed me into this.

I should have told Dwayne

the moment you found out
about the surprise party.

You did the right thing.

How else would I get
the party I wanted?

Besides, I'm not
doing this for me.

I'm doing this for Dwayne.

Come again?

Just think how excited he'll be

when I walk into this room
of adoring people

in my brand-new dress
from my mama.

I practiced
three surprised looks.

Watch.

Oh, my lord.

Three?

Three is the best one, I think.

Excuse me.

Hi.

Don't invite her.

Let us start with a conversation

at the grocery store.

Quand vous voulez preparer
le petit dejeuner

qu'achetez-vous?

Tres bien.

J'achete du lait j'achete...

Terrell:
What's wrong with this?

You put batteries in?

Terrell:
Yes.

Charmaine:
Maybe they haven't started
the test yet.

Are there voices
coming from your bag?

J'achete du lait...

Terrell:
Turn up the volume.

That sounds like Terrell.

Charmaine:
We're supposed
to hear something.

Maybe we're not close enough.

Oh, yes, you are.

It says the transmitter's
effective up to 50 feet.

Is this the transmitter
or the..?

Terrell, stop talking now.

Professor Porter,
look what we just found.

Oh, mon dieu

mon dieu.

Oh, mon dieu, whoa!

Okay, baby, let's go.

Yes. Let's go
out to dinner.

Oh, man.

What's wrong?

My briefcase.

What about it?

I left it at the pit.

The pit?

Oh, how inconvenient.

Baby, would you mind

if we swung by and got it?

No. Let's go
to the pit.

Dwayne, you realize

I could have waited in the car.

Baby, I need you

to help me find my briefcase.

Okay, I'll help.

Let's see if it's in here.

Come on, baby, help me look.

Maybe it's in the kitchen.

Oh, here it is.

I got it.

Hey, whit?

Baby.

I got it.

Oh.

What's so funny?

It was something
I was thinking about earlier.

Baby, let's go.

Where?

To the restaurant.

Oh.

Hit the lights for me, baby.

"Hit the lights"?

Whitley!

Come on, Charmaine.

Nobody thinking about you.

I feel so humiliated.

You think I'm proud
of what we did?

The whole school
is talking about us.

Ain't nobody thinking about you.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
miss thing.

You got caught cheating today.

Except her.

I didn't know you had it in you

miss goody-goody.

Shh! Please.

Charmaine, I know
it's unlike you

to stoop to such
contemptible deceit

but our god is a forgiving god.

Word.

The hardest part will be
forgiving yourself.

Good luck, sister.

Oh, woe is me.

At least professor Porter
isn't reporting us

to the honor board.

We got a "f" on our midterms.

Damn, you're a bad
influence on me.

Well, if it isn't
america's most stupid.

I might not have done this

if you hadn't acted
high and mighty, Gina.

How about when you made
fun of me in math class?

I felt bad

because you were doing
better than me.

I didn't know
I could be so ugly.

Come on, now.
I seen you
in the morning.

I'm sorry, Charmaine.

I'm sorry too.

I didn't mean to go there.

I just felt good
being better for once.

I got to hit the books
so I can get a passing grade.

I'll help you.

You will?

Yeah, I'll help you.

Mercy.

This is not Marvin
gaye, it's merci.

Oh.

Merci.

Yeah, you going to need
a lot of help.

Hey, baby, you're not eating.

I'm just overwhelmed
by the ambiance.

Can I have that wing?

Mm-hmm.

You keep looking at the door.

You expecting somebody?

No.

Are you sure?

Why?

Maybe I have a surprise for you.

I knew it.

I knew it, Dwayne.

£ happy easter,
happy fourth of July £

£ I hope you're happy
with your birthday bean pie. £

hey!

Now blow that out.

Go, baby.

I wrote that, baby.

£ happy easter,
happy fourth of July £

£ I hope you're happy
with your... £

what did you do with my party?

Party? What party?

Don't play games
with me, Dwayne.

Don't play games with you?

Where is everybody?

What did you do with it?

Wait. Are you saying

you know something
about some party?

Perhaps.

Perhaps.

How about you just say

"honey, I planned
the whole thing"?

Okay. So what
if I did?

I deserve it.

I've been to hell and back
this year.

I spent my honeymoon
in the L.A. riots.

I've been living with your
thrift shop furniture.

I lost my job. I went
to unemployment.

I've been teaching
those little monsters

and flipping flapjacks.

You bet I planned this party!

Now I got my hair done
and I got my new dress on

and I want my party.

I want my shrimp.

What about me, baby?

I invited you.

I, I, I, I, I.

I'm talking about what about me?

Huh?

Who was there with you

through the riots and robberies?

You were.

Okay.

And I love you, Dwayne.

It's because of this love

that I just want you to give
the best surprise party

you've ever given...

Whitley, you can do
better than that.

What's the matter with you?

You didn't think my party
would be good enough?

So what, you get chicken
instead of shrimp.

Why didn't you let me
do it for you?

I would have liked to try.

You got a control problem, baby.

Okay, you're right,
and I'm sorry.

What did you do with my party?

I canned the party.

You canned it?

Yes. That's what I said,
isn't it?

I canned the party.

Excuse me.

You want that chicken
to go, baby?

Hey, baby, put this
in the refrigerator, please?

All:
Surprise!

£ happy easter,
happy fourth of July £

£ we hope you like
your happy birthday bean pie. £

£ happy birthday £

£ hey! £

£ happy birthday, hey! £

£ happy birthday, hey! £

£ happy birthday, ho! £

£ happy birthday, ho! £

£ happy birthday, ho! £