8 Simple Rules (2002–2005): Season 2, Episode 14 - Opposites Attract: Part 2 - full transcript

WOW, DAD. I AM IMPRESSED.

YOU DID A GREAT JOB
FIXING UP THAT BASEMENT.

YOU SURE YOU'RE GONNA BE
OKAY DOWN THERE BY YOURSELF?

I'M A BIG BOY. I'LL BE FINE.

I THINK RORY MIGHT MISS
ME SLEEPING IN HIS ROOM...

YOU KNOW, OUR
LITTLE MIDNIGHT CHATS.

OKAY, GRAMPS, HERE'S
THE REST OF YOUR CRAP.

THANK GOD I CAN SLEEP AGAIN.

GRANDMA EVER TELL YOU
YOU SNORE LIKE AN ELEPHANT?

HE HAS MAGAZINES, CATE.

GRANDPA!



MOM, C.J.'S STILL IN THE
SHOWER. IT'S BEEN 45 MINUTES.

HE'S USING UP ALL THE HOT WATER.

YEAH, NOW WE HAVE TWO BLONDES IN THIS
HOUSE WHO THINK THEY OWN THE BATHROOM.

GREAT. I HAVEN'T HAD MY
SHOWER, AND I LIKE MY SHOWER.

YEAH, I LIKE MY SHOWER TOO.

OH, WE KNOW YOU DO.

MOTHER, YOU HAVE
GOT TO DO SOMETHING.

JEREMY IS TUTORING ME TODAY. I
STILL HAVE TO DO MY HAIR, MY MAKE-UP,

PRACTICE MY BRAINY
POSE IN THE MIRROR...

I MEAN, IT IS JUST SO
MUCH WORK BEING SMART.

YOU SO LIKE HIM.

JEREMY? I DO NOT.

HE'S MY FRIEND,
HE'S MY TUTOR, HE'S...

HE'S YOUR BOYFRIEND
AND YOU LOOOVE HIM!



YEAH, YOU LOOOOVE HIM!

HOW DO YOU KNOW IT IS JUST
NOT MY LOVE OF KNOWLEDGE?

OKAY, FINE, I LIKE A GEEK.

GEE, I... I SMELL SMOKE.

DAD?

WELL, DON'T LOOK AT ME.

I'M NOT ALLOWED
TO SMOKE INDOORS.

NO NO, I HAVE TO SMOKE OUTSIDE

IN THE FREEZING,
BITTER MICHIGAN WINTER.

IT DOESN'T SMELL
LIKE CIGARETTES.

IT SMELLS LIKE...
C.J.'S VAN! IT'S ON FIRE!

SOMETIMES I SMOKE IN C.J.'S VAN.

OH! SOMEBODY CALL 911.

CALL 911!

OH, AND SOMEBODY TELL C.J.

All: I WANT TO TELL
HIM! NO, YOU TELL HIM!

YOU'RE ALL IN FOR A TREAT!

IN A FEW MINUTES, MY HAIR WILL
BE EXTRA BOUNCY AND MANAGEABLE.

C.J... C.J., YOUR
VAN IS ON FIRE.

MY BABY!

YOU KNOW, BRIDGET,
THIS IS REALLY GOOD.

SHUT UP!

NO, I'M SURE IT'S AN A.

I DON'T THINK YOU
NEED ME ANYMORE.

OH OH! SHE NEEDS YOU.

I NEED YOU FOR TUTORING.

SEE, NEXT WEEK I HAVE TO
DEBATE LACEY IN SPEECH CLASS.

OOH, LACEY.

SHE'S CAPTAIN OF
THE DEBATE TEAM.

YOU MUST HAVE BEEN
BAD IN A PRIOR LIFE.

OH, SHE WAS. SHE WAS
VERY VERY NAUGHTY.

WHO'S THE HOMELESS GUY?

HEY, I'D BE REALLY INSULTED
BY THAT IF I HAD A HOME.

JUST IGNORE HIM.
HE'S OUR LAZY COUSIN.

- HE LIVES ON THE COUCH.
- OH.

WELL, YOUR HOUR'S UP.
GUESS I'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME.

OOH, IF I HAD A DOLLAR FOR
EVERY TIME I HEARD THAT ONE.

OKAY, WELL THEN
WE'LL DO THIS LATER.

HOW ABOUT SATURDAY NIGHT?

I CAN'T. I'M GOING TO A PARTY.

YOU'RE GOING TO A
PARTY... WITH GIRLS?

NO, SEE, IT'S A NERD
PARTY SO WE FLIP A COIN

AND HALF OF US SHOW
UP DRESSED AS GIRLS.

YES, THERE ARE
GONNA BE GIRLS THERE.

HOT GIRLS?

YOU ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS.

BYE.

BYE!

OH, YOU GOT SHOT
DOWN SO HARD. I LOVE IT.

HI, AUNT CATE...
RORY, GRAND-PYRO.

SO, C.J., WERE YOU JUST PLANNING

ON SLEEPING ON
THE COUCH ALL DAY?

MAYBE IF I COULD GET
SOME QUIET AROUND HERE.

PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE
WEARING SOMETHING UNDER THERE.

NOW LOOK, YOU CANNOT JUST
MOVE INTO MY LIVING ROOM.

I ACTUALLY HAVE PEOPLE
COMING OVER TONIGHT.

OOH. LOUD PEOPLE?

NOBODY RAN THAT BY ME.

JUST LOOK AT HIM. LOOK AT HIM... HE'S
TAKEN OVER THE WHOLE LIVING ROOM.

WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE THAT VAN
YOU BURNED DOWN WAS HIS HOME.

WELL, IF YOU'D LET
ME SMOKE INSIDE,

IT NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED.

YEAH, NOW THERE'S LOGIC.
YOU SOUND LIKE BRIDGET.

WHATEVER!

CATE, THIS IS YOUR HOUSE.

TAKE CHARGE. SET
SOME RULES. GO ON.

OKAY.

C.J.?

I WANT YOU TO MOVE INTO
YOUR GRANDFATHER'S ROOM.

HEY, KERR? I NEED A FAVOR.

JEREMY'S GOING TO SOME GEEK
PARTY. I NEED YOU TO GET ME IN.

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

HOW DARE YOU? WHAT
MAKES YOU THINK THAT...

CAN YOU GET ME IN OR NOT?

YEAH, I CAN GET YOU IN.

OKAY, BUT THEY'RE NOT
GEEKS, THEY'RE ACADEMICS.

OKAY, WHATEVER,
I'M NOT AN ACADEMIC

AND I DON'T WANT TO STAND OUT, SO
IS THERE ANYTHING I NEED TO KNOW?

HISTORY, POETRY,
PHILOSOPHY, ADDITION.

AND IF YOU HAVE TO
SPEAK, DON'T SAY "TOTALLY"

AND "SO" AND "OH MY GOD."

OKAY, I CAN SO DO THAT.

I TOTALLY JUST SAID "SO."

AND "TOTALLY"! OH MY GOD!

HEY, GRANDPA, I HOPE YOU DON'T
MIND... I USED YOUR TOOTHBRUSH.

YOU DID WHAT?

YEAH, MINE WAS IN MY VAN

WITH THE REST OF MY STUFF.

THE VAN WAS A FIRE TRAP.

YEAH, THIS FROM A
GUY WHO WAS AROUND

WHEN FIRE WAS INVENTED.

Cate: HEY, KNOCK
IT OFF, YOU TWO.

DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE.

Both: OKAY. FINE.

- ALL RIGHT, SCOOCH.
- WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?

I'M GOING TO BED.

NOT HERE, YOU'RE NOT.

IT'S OKAY, GRANDPA. I'M
WEARING UNDERPANTS THIS TIME.

WELL, I'M NOT.

YOU'RE BLUFFING.

YOU SURE THAT'S A
CHANCE YOU WANT TO TAKE?

YOU THINK YOU CAN
SCARE ME OFF WITH... HO!

COME ON, I'M WEARING
PAJAMAS, YOU WIMP.

THE FLAP!

SORRY.

HEY, DON'T YOU HAVE
A SLEEPING BAG OR...

OH, YEAH, I DID,

BUT APPARENTLY WHEN VIEWED
THROUGH 200-YEAR-OLD EYEBALLS

IT LOOKS LIKE AN ASHTRAY.

YOU PIPE DOWN WITH
THE OLD-GUY JOKES.

I'M NOT SO OLD I
CAN'T KICK YOUR BUTT.

LIKE YOU COULD EVER CATCH ME.
YOU MOVE AT THE SPEED OF MOSS.

ALWAYS WITH THE CANE! PUT THE
CANE DOWN AND WE'LL GO AT IT!

OKAY, WHAT IS GOING ON?

- IT'S BEDTIME.
- HE STARTED IT.

HE STARTED IT.

CATE, THIS IS JUST
NOT GONNA WORK OUT.

YOU GUYS, I'M AT MY WIT'S END.

I AM A SINGLE MOM AND I
JUST REALIZED I HAVE FIVE KIDS.

THE THREE GOOD ONES ARE ASLEEP.

RELAX. THIS IS
STRICTLY SHORT-TERM.

MY GIRLFRIEND SABRINA
JUST GOT OUT OF THE SERVICE.

SABRINA? YOU... YOU NEVER
MENTIONED YOU HAD A GIRLFRIEND.

OH, YEAH. SHE'S GONNA
COME HERE AND PICK ME UP.

WE'RE GONNA GO TO CALIFORN-I-A:

SUN, FUN AND
MARGARITAS. WHOO HOO!

SEE, DAD? HE WON'T EVEN
BE HERE THAT MUCH LONGER.

CAN'T YOU JUST PUT ASIDE YOUR
DIFFERENCES FOR A FEW DAYS?

YEAH. OR WOULD THAT RUIN YOUR
PLANS TO SMOTHER ME IN MY SLEEP?

IT'S NOT LIKE I HAD
THE PILLOW PICKED OUT.

SHE'S HERE. SHE'S HERE!

NO.

DAD, NOT EVERY CAR IS
GONNA BE C.J.'S GIRLFRIEND.

IT ONLY TAKES ONE TO
GET HIS BUTT TO CALIFORNIA.

KERRY, I'M A LITTLE
NERVOUS ABOUT THIS PARTY.

IS EVERYONE THERE
GONNA BE SMART?

WELL, LET'S SEE: THERE'LL BE LACEY,
JEREMY, ME. I'M GONNA BRING KYLE...

OH, KYLE... THANK GOD.

YOU KNOW, BRIDGET. I
AM REALLY IMPRESSED

THAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY
GOING TO A GEEK...

ACADEMIC PARTY.

YOU KNOW, IT JUST SHOWS
A LOT OF GROWTH IN YOU.

YOU KNOW ACTUALLY, I
MET YOUR DAD AT A GEEK...

ACADEMIC PARTY.

- REALLY?
- YEAH.

YOU KNOW, I USED TO ONLY GO
OUT WITH MUSICIANS AND BAD BOYS.

AND THEN ONE NIGHT MY
ROOMMATE TOOK ME TO THIS PARTY

THAT WAS BEING THROWN BY
THIS TOTAL BUNCH OF WRITER GEE...

GEEK, MOM! GO
AHEAD AND SAY "GEEK."

NEVER MIND. JUST
HAVE A GOOD TIME.

THAT'S YOU! YOU'RE HERE.

YOU MADE IT.

THAT'S HER. SHE'S
HERE. SHE MADE IT.

ALL RIGHT, LOVE
MONKEY, HERE I COME!

OH. SHE'S ACTUALLY HOT.

WOW, LOOK, THEY'RE HUGGING.

I'VE NEVER SEEN C.J. SO HAPPY.

WAIT, SHE JUST PUSHED
HIM TO THE GROUND.

WITH EASE.

NO NO NO! KISS AND MAKE UP.

TAKE HIM TO CALIFORNIA.

NOW SHE'S HEADING
BACK TO THE CAR...

WITH HIM ON HER LEG. SHE'S
ACTUALLY DRAGGING HIM.

WITH EASE.

AND GOODBYE, LOVE MONKEY.

SEE, BRIDGE, THERE'S
NO DIFFERENCE.

WE DON'T JUST SOLVE EQUATIONS
AND DISCUSS WORLD POLITICS.

WE'RE JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.

WE CAN PARTY HARD.

DESCARTES! RENE DESCARTES!

NO, JOHN STUART MILL!

KERRY, I JUST FEEL
LIKE I STICK OUT.

I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY HERE.

I DO.

I THINK I'VE STUFFED EVERY
GUY HERE IN A LOCKER.

JEREMY! AH, CRAZY!

WE'RE BOTH AT THE SAME
PARTY AT THE SAME TIME.

WHAT A COINCIDENCE.

BRIDGET, THIS ISN'T
REALLY YOUR SCENE.

OH, WHO'S TO SAY WHAT
SCENE BELONGS TO...

WHOM.

"WHOM" IS RIGHT.

SO ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?

OH MY GOD, YES!
THIS IS SO TOTALLY...

WHOM.

I CAN'T STAND TO SEE
A GROWN MAN CRY.

WHY DON'T YOU GET OUT OF HERE?

MAKE THE PAIN GO AWAY, POPPY.

CATE?

YEAH?

MAKE THE PAIN GO AWAY.

UH... C.J.?

TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED.

I DON'T WANT RORY
TO SEE ME LIKE THIS.

NO, I'M COOL.

WELL, APPARENTLY HER THERAPIST,

WHO SHE'S PROBABLY
SLEEPING WITH,

TOLD HER SHE NEEDS TO
SEE ME FACE TO FACE TO END IT

FOR CLOSURE. GLAD SHE'S
HEALED... DEVIL WOMAN!

SO WHY'D SHE DUMP YOUR ASS?

RORY! OUT.

GO ON.

SORRY, C.J.

BUT, YOU KNOW, SINCE HE ASKED.

SABRINA THINKS I'M
KINDA SORTA AIMLESS.

YEAH, RIGHT?

WITH NO ROOTS OR
FUTURE, LIKE SHE KNOWS.

AND OTHER BLIPPITY-BLAB.

OH, YEAH, SHE'S MARRIED.

C.J.?

WELL, SHE GOT MARRIED
BECAUSE OF THE OTHER STUFF.

YOU KNOW, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
ENTERTAIN THE REMOTE POSSIBILITY

THAT SHE'S ONTO SOMETHING.

YEAH, YOU ARE AIMLESS.

YOU'RE LIVING WITH YOUR
GRANDFATHER IN A BASEMENT.

WHAT KIND OF FUTURE IS THAT?

GLASS HOUSES, COCHISE.

YOU KNOW, C.J., MAYBE
THIS ISN'T A BAD THING.

MAYBE THIS IS A CHANCE
FOR YOU TO START OVER.

YOU KNOW, YOUR UNCLE PAUL

ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU
HAD A LOT OF POTENTIAL.

REALLY?

YES.

C.J., YOU'RE AN ADULT.

IT'S TIME TO START THINKING SERIOUSLY
ABOUT BECOMING INDEPENDENT.

FIND A JOB, A CAREER;

GO TO COLLEGE.

YOU KNOW, IT'S A BIG
WIDE WORLD OUT THERE.

JUST SPREAD YOUR
WINGS AND FLY... AWAY.

FAR FAR AWAY.

BRIDGET, CAN I ASK
YOU SOMETHING?

CAN YOU ASK ME SOMETHING?

YES. MAY YOU ASK ME SOMETHING?

I DON'T KNOW.

NO, I CAN'T ASK YOU THIS.

OH, COME ON, YOU
KNOW WHAT THEY SAY:

NOTHING VENTURED IS NOTHING...

SOMETHING. JUST ASK ME.

ALL RIGHT. HERE IT GOES:

SO SAY THERE'S THIS GUY,

AND HE WANTS TO ASK
OUT THIS REALLY CUTE GIRL,

BUT HE'S AFRAID BECAUSE
SHE MIGHT SAY NO.

WELL,

I THINK THAT THAT GUY
SHOULD TAKE THE CHANCE

ON ASKING OUT
THAT BEAUTIFUL GIRL,

BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING THE
ANSWER'S GONNA BE A BIG FAT YES.

REALLY?

YES, TRUST ME.

ALL RIGHT.

I'M GONNA DO IT.

HEY, LACEY, YOU WANT
TO GO OUT SOMETIME?

WAIT, WHAT?

SURE.

- WAIT, DO YOU LIKE PONIES?
- UH...

AND DON'T JUST SAY YES
SO YOU CAN GET WITH THIS.

OKAY.

HONEY, IT'S REALLY GREAT TO SEE YOU
TAKE SUCH AN INTEREST IN YOUR STUDIES.

WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT?

OH, WHAT'S IT ABOUT? YEAH YEAH,
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT IT'S ABOUT, MISSY.

IT IS ABOUT ME WINNING JEREMY

AND HUMILIATING LACEY SO MUCH

THAT SHE CAN'T SHOW HER FACE
ANYMORE AND HAS TO MOVE TO, LIKE,

THE NORTHERN TERRITORIES
TO LIVE WITH THE BEARS

UNTIL ONE DAY SHE STARTS
RIDING THAT BEAR LIKE A PONY

AND IT TURNS AROUND
BECAUSE IT'S SO MAD IT EATS HER.

AND BECAUSE HE ATE SO MUCH OF
HER, HIS FACE STARTS TO LOOK LIKE LACEY

AND ALL THE OTHER BEARS GO,
"HA, YOUR FACE LOOKS LIKE LACEY!"

I MEANT, WHAT'S
THE DEBATE ABOUT?

OH... HONESTY IS
THE BEST POLICY.

HEY, DAD, WHERE YOU BEEN?

JOGGING.

GEE, YOU'RE IN A GOOD MOOD.

I COULDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.

C.J. KEPT WAKING ME UP
EVERY TIME I STARTED SNORING

TO SAY, "GRANDPA,
YOU'RE SNORING AGAIN."

THEN WHEN I WASN'T
SNORING, HE HAD TO WAKE ME UP

AND SAY, "SORRY, I
THOUGHT YOU CROAKED."

NOW LOOK, DAD, I KNOW THAT
C.J. IS CRAMPING ALL OUR STYLE.

DAMN RIGHT HE IS. AND HE'LL
STAY HERE AS LONG AS YOU LET HIM.

HE'S GONNA WALK ALL OVER YOU.

NO, HE'S NOT. C.J.'S GONNA
GET HIS ACT TOGETHER

IF WE JUST BELIEVE IN HIM.

COME ON, HE'S FAMILY.

MAYBE HE'S NOT.

WE COULD DO A D.N.A. TEST.

NOW DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT.

YOU'RE A NURSE; GIVE
SCIENCE A CHANCE.

HEY, GUYS, I GOT GREAT NEWS.

- YOUR GIRLFRIEND
TOOK YOU BACK?
- NO.

- THEY LET YOU BACK
IN THE ARMY?
- NO.

- YOU GOT YOUR VAN FIXED.
- I KNOW THE NEWS.

HOW ABOUT I'LL TELL
THE NEWS? OKAY?

I TOOK AUNT CATE'S ADVICE

AND I HAVE ENROLLED AND
BEEN ACCEPTED INTO COLLEGE.

OH, YES, AN INSTITUTION
OF HIGHER LEARNING.

OKAY, DO YOU MEAN
COLLEGE OR AN INSTITUTION?

BECAUSE THERE'S
A BIG DIFFERENCE.

WELL, CHECK THIS
OUT, CARROT TOP:

THIS IS MY FIRST SYLLABUS.

IT'S A FUN WORD,
ISN'T IT? SYLLABUS.

SYLLABUS... LA LA LA LAA... LUS.

YOU KNOW, C.J., THAT IS GREAT.

YOU ARE GOING AWAY TO COLLEGE.

CONGRATULATIONS.
WE ARE SO PROUD.

SO... SO HOW FAR AWAY?

IT'S CALLED GEORGE
ROMNEY COMMUNITY COLLEGE.

COMMUNITY COLLEGE?

YEAH.

I'M TAKING INTRO TO ASTROPHYSICS

AND LEATHERWORKS.

GEORGE ROMNEY? WHY
DOES THAT SOUND FAMILIAR?

IT'S NEXT TO THE GAS
N' SIP YOU LIMP UP TO

WHEN YOU WANT TO BUY
CIGARETTES TO BURN DOWN VANS.

YEAH, IT'S DOWN THE STREET.

YOU ARE GOING TO
COLLEGE DOWN THE STREET?

- YEAH, ISN'T THAT CONVENIENT?
- FOR YOU.

IS THIS YOUR IDEA OF
BEING INDEPENDENT?

YOU'RE GONNA LIVE IN MY BASEMENT

WHILE YOU GO TO COMMUNITY
COLLEGE TILL YOU GRADUATE?

A TWO-YEAR COLLEGE.

THAT SHOULD TAKE YOU WHAT?
ABOUT SIX YEARS TO COMPLETE?

YEAH, ABOUT.

C.J., I STOOD UP FOR YOU.

NOW I FEEL LIKE YOU
ARE WALKING ALL OVER US.

AND IF YOU THINK THAT YOU'RE
GOING TO LIVE HERE FOREVER FOR FREE,

YOU ARE COMPLETELY
OUT OF YOUR MIND.

DID I FORGET TO MENTION THAT
I'M LIVING IN STUDENT HOUSING?

YES.

YES, YOU DID.

AND... AND THAT'S TERRIFIC, C.J.

DAD, DID YOU HEAR ABOUT C.J.?

SO IN CONCLUSION,

OUR ENTIRE SOCIETY
IS BASED ON TRUST.

THEREFORE HONESTY IS
ALWAYS THE BEST POLICY... NO LIE.

THANK YOU.

Teacher: VERY NICE, BRIDGET.

AND NOW WE'LL HEAR FROM LACEY.

I OFFER ONE FINAL EXAMPLE:

DURING WORLD WAR II,

MANY PEOPLE LIED TO
THE GESTAPO WHEN ASKED

WHETHER OR NOT
THEY WERE HIDING JEWS.

THOSE WHO LIED SAVED
INNOCENT PEOPLE.

WHAT BETTER EXAMPLE
TO SUPPORT MY POSITION

THAT HONESTY IS NOT
ALWAYS, AS IN PERMANENT,

INFINITE, ABSOLUTE,
THE BEST POLICY.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, LACEY.

AND NOW BRIDGET'S REBUTTAL.

OKAY. YEAH.

OKAY, WELL,

LACEY OVER HERE HAS MADE
SOME... SOME GREAT POINTS...

MY ESTEEMED OPPONENT.

BUT... HOWEVER, UM,
THAT, UM... YEAH YEAH.

THAT... OH, THAT THING I SAID
ABOUT THE SOCIETY: TRUE.

AND, UM, YES, VERY
TRUE. OH, HONESTY!

HONESTY! THIS IS... HONESTY.

THE OTHER DAY I HAD
LIPSTICK ON MY TEETH

AND TALIA TOLD ME. EVEN THOUGH
SHE DIDN'T REALLY SAVE MY LIFE,

IF I WOULD HAVE GONE OUT
WITH LIPSTICK ON MY TEETH,

I WOULD HAVE TOTALLY
DIED, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

THANK YOU.

LACEY, YOUR REBUTTAL?

I'M GOOD.

ALL RIGHT, CLASS. WE'LL PICK
IT UP FROM HERE TOMORROW.

HEY, NICE JOB.

YEAH, RIGHT. TOTALLY
EMBARRASSED MYSELF.

YOU DID NOT.

I MEAN, IT'S NOT AS THOUGH YOU
HAVE LIPSTICK ON YOUR TEETH.

THAT'S NOT FUNNY, OKAY?

I'M HUMILIATED.

JUST LEAVE ME ALONE. GO
CONGRATULATE YOUR GIRLFRIEND.

WHAT ARE YOU SO MAD AT ME FOR?

I'M NOT MAD AT YOU!

SHE HISSED.

YOU KNOW, YOU JUST... YOU
JUST THINK YOU'RE SO SMART

WITH YOUR STRAIGHT As. AND I
GO TO YOUR ACADEMIC PARTIES

AND I TRY AND BE NOTICED BY YOU

AND IT'S LIKE "BUY
A VOWEL" ALREADY.

AND YOU HAVE TO... YOU'VE GOT TO BE
THE DUMBEST SMART GUY I'VE EVER SEEN

IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. AND IT JUST
TURNS OUT YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE ME.

IT'S FINE. WHATEVER.

WHOA. WHAT?

BRIDGET, I LIKE YOU.

I MEAN, I REALLY LIKE YOU.

I MEAN, GOSH, YOU
KNOW, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

YOU'RE SWEET AND YOU'RE SMART.

YOU KNOW, AT MOST, I
THOUGHT WE COULD BE FRIENDS.

BUT I MEAN, I NEVER WOULD
HAVE DREAMED THAT...

BRIDGET HENNESSY
COULD LIKE SOMEONE WHO...

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, I'M IN
MY WORLD; YOU'RE IN YOURS.

OKAY, YOU'RE BEING INITIATED
INTO SOME CLUB, AREN'T YOU?

'CAUSE...

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

I'LL QUIT SCHOOL; GET A JOB.

SO WAIT, ALL THAT STUFF YOU
WERE SAYING AT THE PARTY

ABOUT ASKING SOME
GIRL OUT WAS REALLY ME,

BUT YOU DIDN'T WANT TO 'CAUSE
YOU THOUGHT I WAS WAY WAY WAY

OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE AND
UNATTAINABLE AND STUFF?

YOU DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO
GO OUT WITH LACEY, DID YOU?

- NO, WE WENT OUT.
- WHAT?

WELL, YOU KNOW, WE BROKE UP.

OH. OKAY.

YEAH, SHE DUMPED ME. I MEAN, I
LIKE PONIES AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GUY,

BUT SHE'S A FREAK.

WAIT WAIT WAIT.
HOLD ON A SECOND.

I'M YOUR REBOUND TO PONY GIRL?

LET'S TRY NOT TO
LOOK AT IT THAT WAY.

IT'S SO QUIET AROUND
HERE WITHOUT C.J.

IT'S CALLED PEACE.

HEY, EVERYBODY,
WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

OH, YEAH, I'M BACK
AND I'M IN A GOOD MOOD.

IN LEATHER CLASS, I GOT
AN A-MINUS ON MY BELT.

NOW C.J., AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO BE LIVING AT SCHOOL?

YEAH, WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE I
CAN AFFORD THE MEAL PLAN.

I'M SAVING UP FOR A NEW VAN...
A COOL ONE WITH FLAMES ON IT.

SO YOU'LL BE COMING HERE
EVERY NIGHT FOR DINNER?

WHOA, HEY! I CAN'T
PROMISE EVERY NIGHT.

I DO HAVE A LIFE.

HEY, PIPPY, STOP BOGARTING
THE MAC AND CHEESE.