7th Heaven (1996–2007): Season 6, Episode 13 - Drunk - full transcript

Hey, Morris.
What's up,
man?

Morris, hey!

How do you do that?

Uh, do what?

Be so popular.

Everybody knows you;
everybody likes you.

You hang out with the
coolest kids in school.

Face it, man, if
this school had a
king, you'd be it.

Well, you...

Hey, people
know you, too.

People know me as
some school do-gooder.



Saint Simon,
son of a minister.
Maybe,

but that could be cool, too.

I mean, you're always
doing the right thing,

even if it doesn't make you
the most popular guy.

And doing what's right
counts for something.

Yeah, it counts for me
having no fun this year.

I'm sorry, I'm tired of
doing the right thing.

I want people to like
me because I'm wild
and crazy and fun.

You know, not-not
because I'm good.

I want to hang out
with your friends.

Your friends
are the best.

You don't even know my friends.

They're popular

and they have fun.



What else do
I need to know?

Ha-ha! You hear the news?

My parents took off
for the weekend.

Which means...
Party.

Everybody party!

Oh, yeah!

Oh, I already lined
up the women, man.

It's gonna be
a blowout.
So, are you in?

Oh, I'm so in,
I'm already there! Whoo!

Yeah, I'm in, too!

Uh, Tom, Mike, you know Simon.

Uh, Simon Camden.

You're that
minister's kid.

My dad's a minister, yeah.

I don't think you'd feel
comfortable at my party.

It's not gonna be
a religious affair.

My dad's the minister, not me.

So, you want to come
to my party, huh?

Okay.

Okay, fine. Come.

Great!

I'll get the address
from Morris.

I'd better get going--
I don't want to miss my bus.

I can miss my bus.

We're out of here.
Yeah.

See you
guys later.

I'll call you later.

Right. I'll see
you tonight.

What are you doing?

He wants to come to the party,
let him come.

Simon Camden's not ready
for one of your parties.

Yeah, that's why it'll be
fun to have him there.

No, no, no, no, no.

You can't be serious.

Oh, I'm serious.

You don't even
know this boy Mike,

I don't know his parents,
and you said everyone

at the party
is going to be a senior.

The answer is no.

Oh, come on, Mom, not everybody
is going to be a senior,

and if I go, I'll get to know
Mike and his friends.

I desperately want to know Mike,

and I want him and his friends
to know me.

I want them to like me.
Can you understand that?

Since when

do you desperately want someone
to like you?

Did you ever go to high school?

Because if you did,
you'd know

that high school is all about
getting people to like you,

an-and finding
a group and fitting in.

Then find another group,
a group your own age,

because the answer is no.

Thanks for ruining my life.

Come on, Luce, why
are you so upset?

Luce?

Stop.

Let's talk about it.

What's going on?

Lucy is a little
upset with me.

No, I am a lot upset
with her.

Mary and I enrolled
in school today.

Is this true?
We have

the same classes,
all the same classes.

What did you do--
dig through my stuff,

find my class schedule
and copy it?

Unbelievable!

Luce, maybe
you're getting upset

over nothing.

You and Mary are both freshmen,

and freshmen usually take
the same classes.

Right?

The Sacred Quest?

Mary is taking a class--
my class-- The Sacred Quest.

It's an exploration
into the spiritual roots

of each student's life

in the context
of various religious traditions.

The professor's

a total babe.
Mom,

tell her she
can't do this.

Tell her
she cannot hijack my life!

She has to live her own life.

She has to take her own classes.

I really think the two of you
should work this out.

Oh, way to wimp out on me.

Thanks.

Oh, and you are
not going out

with me and my friends
tonight.

They invited me.

No, you invited yourself.

Jill and Barb are my friends.

Take your own classes,
make your own friends.

But I like

your classes and your friends.

I need nice people
to hang out with.

I don't want to get mixed up
with the wrong crowd again.

Maybe you can take Mary with you
tonight just this once.

Ugh!

I miss Kitty.

I'm going to take a few
upstairs to hold me over.

What are you doing?

I'm deciding if I want
to see my future or not.

I got back letters

from two of the medical schools
I applied to.

Oh, is that all?

Well, these letters are from
Columbia University and NYU,

the two schools
I really want to go to.

They're also two of the
toughest schools to get into,

and if they accept me, well,

that means...
They like you?

They really, really like you?
If I don't get

into Columbia or NYU, I'm...

I'm not sure
I want to be a doctor.

That's crazy.

Crazy maybe,
but it's how I feel.

Open the envelopes.

Come on, let's find out
if you're going to be a doctor.

No, I-I, I opened them.

I just can't make myself read
the letters.

I'll do it for you.

I'm not sure you're ready
for what's in these envelopes.

When I think you're ready,
I'll give them to you.

I'll help you
with that.

Did Simon talk to you?

Mm-hmm.
Is he still upset?

He was upset?

Oh, extremely upset.

Didn't Simon tell you
that I told him he couldn't go

to this senior party
he wants to go to?

Oops.

Oops, what?

Well, I didn't know you
had said no and I said yes.

Go upstairs,
tell Simon you talked to me--

"Nice try,
but the answer is still no."

Yeah.

Why aren't you going?
Okay, he,

he shouldn't have come to me
after you'd already said no,

but... maybe you
shouldn't have said no.

Your forehead's not hot,

but that has to be
the fever talking.

Come on, it's
just a party.

He just wants
to make friends.

No.

We have to let Simon
grow up some time.

Yes, but
not tonight.

You know, he'll be
with his friend Morris,

and he's older,
he'll look out for Simon.

We don't
know Morris.

Well, that's
why I told Simon

that we have to meet Morris
before they go out.

No.

Oh, I get it.

This is about you wishing
you had whooped it up more

in high school
and college.

And this is about you wishing
you'd whooped it up less

in high school and college.

Fine, if you want
him to go, he can go,

but if the police
bring him back home

after he's been out
vandalizing the school gym

with his "new friends,"

don't come crying
to me about it.

Okay.

Okay.

Oh, come on,
don't do this to me.

I had to beg my parents
to let me go to this party.

Yeah, but I really don't think
you're ready

for this kind of party.

What are you talking about?

These guys are pretty wild

and so are the people
who hang out with them.

They drink, they smoke, they...

I'm not as innocent as I seem.

I can be around people
who are smoking and drinking,

and I am ready for this,

so do me a favor,
don't hold me back.

This is my chance to be a part

of your very cool group
of friends.

Fine.

Let me give you the address.

There is just one more thing.

Um...my dad will only let me go
if you take me

and if you come by the house

and meet him and my mom
before we go.

When did we start dating?

Oh, please,
just help me out this once.

Okay... but you owe me.

You get me into this party,
I'll owe you for life.

How much did
you hear?

Smoking and drinking?

You're only
in tenth grade, Simon.

You cannot go
to this party.

I'm not going to smoke or drink.

Let me tell you something
about saying no

when everyone else
is saying yes.

It's almost impossible.

Are you going to tell Mom and
Dad about what you overheard?

No, but I wish
you'd change your mind.

No way.

I'm going
and I'm gonna have a good time.

You are not coming with me.

Yes, I am.

You are not
coming with me.

Yes, I am.

Okay, give me my letters back.

No.
Yes.

You're not ready.

So you're saying
I didn't get in?

No.
So you're saying I did get in?

No.
What are you saying?

That you're not ready
for those envelopes.

Trust me, you'll thank me
for this later.

So you're going
to the party?

Would you
stop worrying?

Remember, I was raised
by Eric and Annie Camden,

the uberparents
of Glenoak.

I know right from wrong.

I'm going to be fine.

Mary was raised
by our uberparents, too.

I'm not Mary.

Great, you've
met Morris.

Let's go. I'll be
home by curfew.

Before you
and Simon go

to this party tonight,
I need to know

what your intentions are.

Intentions?

Yes.

Do you intend to drink?

Do you intend to smoke?

Do you intend to partake
in any illegal activity?

Do you intend
to watch over my son

and make sure
no harm comes to him?

Do you intend to have him
home before his curfew?

Hey, I'm just
giving him a ride.

No, you're not just
giving him a ride.

You're in charge of him.

Uh, come on. Dad,
help me out here.

No, Simon. No more help
from your father.

I didn't want you
to go to this party,

but I'm going
to let you go--

but only if
your friend Morris

tells me that he's
going to watch out

for you tonight.

Sure, whatever.

I'll keep an eye on him.

Do I have your word?

Yeah. You have my word.

Good.

Let's get out of here.

Hey.

Be careful.

Remember, I have your word.

Oh.

And don't put the whole family
in the van to come

and follow me to this party,
okay? I'm gonna be fine.

Don't you think
you were

a little hard
on Morris?
No.

Look, Simon's
gonna be okay.

Well, if he isn't,

I'm gonna hold you
personally responsible.

I'm gonna get
something to drink.

You want something?

You mean a beer?
No, not a beer. A soda.

Sure.

Hey, you want to
have a little fun?

Hey, Simon.

Having a good time?

Well, I'm having a great time.

I really like
hanging out with you.

This is a great party,
it's a super party, it's...

The real party's
out back.

Come on, he's not ready
for out back yet.

I'm, I'm ready
for out back.

I am.

Follow me.

Welcome to the real party.

Oh, Mike, maybe
he doesn't drink.

Yeah, I don't drink.

Hmm...

Well, there's
punch over there.

C-C-Cool, I like punch.

Oh, help yourself.

Get the big cup.

Bottoms up.

My friends
aren't here yet.

This is a bar.

So?

We shouldn't be in here.

We're not old
enough to drink,

and even if we were,
we don't drink.

We can be in a bar
and not drink.

And remember,

the only reason
I let you come with me

was because you promised
you wouldn't embarrass me.

My friends are older
and mature and...

Drunks.

Did you know we were
coming to a bar?

Is that why you didn't
want me to come tonight?

Hey, Lucy.

Glad you made it.
Sorry we're late.

We couldn't find
a parking space.

Isn't this place great?

It's a bar.

You remember
my sister, Mary.

It's not just a bar,
its the bar.

We're not old enough to drink.

Oh, that won't be a problem.

Barb knows the bartender.

If we order the drinks, they
won't care if you drink them.

Okay, who's buying
the first pitcher?

I will.

Cool.

What are you doing?

I'm hanging out
with my older,

mature friends
who like to drink.

So, you drink?

No. But maybe
tonight I will.

Okay, enough already.

Give me back my letters,
or I'm telling Mom and Dad.

If you were going
to tell Mom and Dad,

you'd have done it at dinner.

You don't want

Mom and Dad to know
you got those letters,

probably because you don't
want to remind them

that you are really
leaving Glenoak.

Or maybe you just don't
want them to know

in case you
didn't get in

so you can save face.

But whatever it is,
you don't want them to know.

So, basically, I own you.

Give me my letters.

Don't worry, when I think you're
ready, I'll give them to you.

And until then?

Have you thought about
what you want to do

if you don't go
to medical school?

Who's buying the next round?

I got it.

You haven't even
touched your beer.

Are you all right?

It's your sister, isn't it?

I don't understand.

If she doesn't want to drink,
why doesn't she leave?

I don't know.

Let me go ask her.

Okay, you win.

I'm gonna go.

I'm going to come back
and pick you up later.

I don't want your drunk friends
giving you a ride home.

You can't leave.

If you leave,

they're going
to expect me to drink,

and I'm going to have
to drink because...

I'm going to be a minister.

What?

If I want to help the people,

I have to be one of the people.

I have to blend, fit in,
and that means drinking.

That is so crazy.

It sounds like something
I would say.

Please don't leave me.

So it's not so bad
having a sister around?

Especially a sober sister, huh?

So you'll stay?

No, we're leaving.

Look, Lucy's leaving
right now because...

Well, if she doesn't,

I'm going to tell my parents
that she was drinking,

and she'll get in big trouble.

Man, your sister is mean.

Tell me about it.

Lucy!

Sorry, I have to go.

To say that

you owe me would be
the biggest understatement

of your short life.

But do yourself a favor,

dump those two.

They're bad,
and you know, I know bad.

Why did we leave the party?

I was having fun.

Uh, because you're drunk,

and you were totally
out of control.

I told you,
you weren't ready

for this kind of party.

I can't be drunk,
it was just punch.

No, not just punch.

Punch made with
grain alcohol.

I can't believe
you're still standing.

And I can't believe
I let this happen.

I'm drunk?

Cool.

You won't think it's so cool

when you're puking
your guts out on the front lawn.

And speaking of
your front lawn,

I really want to walk you
up to the door

to make sure you
get home okay.

But if I do, well...

your mom might hurt me.

So you think you can
make it on your own?

It's just a couple
of houses back.

Yeah, I think I can make it
on my own.

Just take me home
and drop me off.

You are home.

Oh. Well, thanks for the ride.

Are you sure you're
going to be okay?

The first step's a big one.

Hey.
Hi.

What's going on with you
and Ruthie tonight?

Nothing.

Oh, where are you off to?

Nowhere.

Ice cream.

I have a craving.

Oh, I do, too.

I want to know
if Simon's okay.

Think you can pick me up some
peace of mind while you're out?

No problem.

Okay.

Where are you going?

Ice cream.

You should leave
Simon alone.

I will as soon as I see
that he's okay.

What the...?

Hi.

No, I think you're drunk.

I know. I just found out.

Oh, no, it's Dad.
What do we do?

Hey, what's going on?

Nothing.

Could you pick up some
Rocky Road for Sam and David?

Sure, no problem.

Now what are
we going to do?

Oh, I don't feel so good.

Neither does my car.

I didn't know there was alcohol
in the punch. Honest.

I told you not to go
to that party.

Okay!

So what are you guys
going to do?

We're thinking.
We're thinking.

Well, think faster.

I'm starting to feel sick again.

Come on, let's
get him inside,

tell Mom and Dad, and
take him to a bathroom.

I agree.
Wait.

Do we have to tell Mom and Dad
that Simon screwed up?

I mean, it wasn't
really his fault.

He didn't know
the punch had alcohol in it.

Yeah, and I'll never drink punch
at a party again, ever.

I've learned my lesson.

Come on, let's cover for him,
just this once.

Please.

He went to that party.

He knew what kind of people
were going to be there.

He's responsible.

He's guilty.

Let's turn him in.

Okay, so our
choices are:

turn him in
or cover for him.

Let's vote.

Vote on what?

Hey, what smells?

You should go inside.

You're not old enough
to deal with this.

I'm either old enough,
or I'm talking.

The choice is yours.

Fine, you can stay.

Simon...

I drank too much tonight
at a party.

What's the big deal about that?

I drank too much alcohol.

Why would you do a stupid thing
like that?

I didn't know it was alcohol.

How could you not know?

Let's vote.

Those in favor
of telling
Mom and Dad?

You will thank me
for this someday.

No, I won't.

Okay, those in favor of hiding
this from Mom and Dad

and saving Simon's butt?

I don't think we should
let you get away with this,

but I also don't think
we should turn you in,

so I'm not voting,
but I guess I'm helping.

Well, thanks, man.

Don't push it.

Look, I figure

if we sneak him into the house,

sober him up
and then sneak him back out

just before his curfew,

then he could pretend
that he came home

from the party
like nothing ever happened.

Good plan.

Really good plan.

Like Matt said, don't push it.

For this to work,

we have to keep an eye
on Mom and Dad.

I'll take the
first shift.

You sneak him into the house
and get him to a bathroom.

Then one of you
stay with him.

That way, if Mom and Dad
knock on the bathroom door,

you can answer for
Simon. Take shifts.

I'll take the first shift.

I'll stick with Matt,
help with Mom and Dad.

Synchronize your watches.

All right, just give me
and Ruthie five minutes,

then move him
in the house.

They split up.
Where's Dad?

Just leave Dad to me.

Okay.

Hi.

Hi.

Where's the ice cream?

Ice cream.

Yes, your father asked you
to pick up some ice cream

at the Dairy Shack?

Oh, uh, I didn't...
go to the Dairy Shack.

Where'd you go?

Out.

Yes, but out where?

I forgot.

You just got back.

Yes.

Okay, what's going on?

Nothing.

Fine, whatever.

Okay, I've got to get the twins
upstairs and give them a bath.

No, you can't.

No, I heard excessive batheing
is bad for toddlers.

Well, it's been one day
since their last bath,

that's hardly excessive.

Hey, you say tomato,
the experts say to-ma-to.

What is going on?

Is this about the envelopes
from Columbia and NYU?

You-you know about that?

I know about everything.

Do you want to talk about it?

Sure.

Okay, just as soon as
I give the boys a bath.

No.
I want to talk to you now.

Can't you just skip the bath
tonight, just this once?

Okay, I can skip the bath,

but I do need to get them
to bed.

No. I want to put my brothers
to bed.

Okay, fine.

You can put them to bed.

And you wait for me right here.
You won't move?

Promise?

Yes, I promise.

Okay.

Faster, faster, faster...

We're toast.

The twins' room. Run!

What do we do now?

Pray.

Dad!

Dad...
I need to talk to you.

Ruthie.

Thank you, God.

Okay, I just need...
No, not later.

Now.

It's important,
very, very important.

I need to talk to you about...
sex.

Yes, I said sex.

Okay.

And I need to talk to you
about it in private.

She's good.

I've never
been prouder.

Okay, uh...

uh, let's go up to your room.

We're going up to my room!

Who are you talking to?

You.

Okay, get Simon
into the bathroom.

Lucy can help me

with Sam and David.

Okay, I've got a question.

About sex?

Are-are
you sure you don't,

you don't want to ask
your mother about this?

No, I want
to talk to you.

Okay.

So... what's your question?

Why don't you guess?

You want me to guess
the question

that you have about sex?

Yeah.

Because...?

Are you embarrassed?

Yeah, that's it.

I'm embarrassed.

Start guessing.

I can take care of the boys;
you should get back to Mom.

All right. After you
put the boys down,

come down
and help me with Mom.

You know, maybe we should have
just let Simon get in trouble.

Maybe, but if
he's learned

his lesson, what's
the point of punishing him?

But what if he hasn't
learned his lesson?

That's got to be
the last of it.

I hope so.

So why'd you vote against me?

Why'd you want
to turn me in?

Simon, unless you get
in trouble,

you're never going to think

you ever really were
in trouble.

And you're probably
just gonna go out

and do something like this
again.

And maybe next time,
you'll do something more stupid.

So, instead of just
being hungover,

with your head in a toilet,

you'll be...
you'll be dead, or...

or you'll kill
some innocent person.

Way to bring the room down.

This isn't a joke.

Sorry.

You don't get it.

You just don't get it.

And you know why
that I know you don't get it?

Because for over a year,
I didn't get it.

I thought you wanted to talk
to me about those letters.

I do.

Hi.

Oh, hi, Lucy.
Did you want to talk to Mom?

Yeah.

Hi.

What do you need
to talk to me about?

Um... I...

Yes, you...?

...might...

Yes, you might...?

...get back together
with Robbie.

What?

You know you can ask your mother
and me anything, about anything.

You, you know that?

Reproduction.

Reproduction?

Yeah, reproduction.
That's my question.

But... What about reproduction?

Why can't cats mate with dogs?

... Okay.

Here, put this on.

Then button up your coat

and maybe Mom and Dad
won't notice you changed.

I couldn't hold
Mom any longer.

She's on her way up here.

Yes?
Yes?

Matt, why are you
in the bathroom with Mary?

I don't know.

He needed some help.

With what?

My... my hair.

I hate my hair.
Mary's great with hair.

Yeah.

Lucy?

Hi, Mom.

Is Mary doing your hair, too?

No, I'm very happy
with my hair.

Well, when you all get done
doing your hair,

I want to talk to you.

Okay.

You think she's onto us?

Okay, here's the thing
about cats and dogs.

A cat is a cat
and a dog is a dog.

And they don't...

Well, they don't
usually like each other.

Well, what if a cat was
really attracted to a dog.

What, then?

What's going on?

Well, Ruthie had a question
about sex,

but, uh...
I think I covered it.

I have another question.

Can Happy still have puppies?

Yes.

Thanks.

Good talk, Dad.

Something's going on.

Oh, yeah.

Shh.

There's someone at the door.

Well, who cares.

Whoever it is, will keep
Mom and Dad busy

while Simon heads
to the front door.

I don't know
where the rest of you
are, but we got it.

Just say you ate some shellfish
and it didn't agree with you.

Okay,

breath check.

It isn't pretty,
but it'll do.

Well, I hope
we did the right thing tonight.

Who thinks
we did the right thing tonight?

Yeah, we screwed up.

Like I said, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean
to just drop him off and run,

but he was drunk, and

I was scared.

I came back because
I gave Mrs. Camden my word,

and I wanted to apologize.

I know

I should have done
the right thing

a couple of hours ago,

but doing the right thing
is kind of new to me,

so it took me
a little longer

to make my way back here.

I'm... I'm so sorry.

Simon was drunk?

Yeah, Simon was very drunk.

My friends like to serve
this grain alcohol punch

at all their parties.

By the time

I found him out back,
well, he was gone.

He was way gone.

Uh, I think
my friends

were messing with him.

I don't know.

Sometimes
they can be real jerks.

So,

is Simon okay,
or...?

Oh, uh... great party.

Thanks for letting me go,

but I'm really beat,
so I'm gonna go to bed now.

Is something wrong?

Drunk?

You were drunk?

And you all tried
to hide this from
your mother and me?

Go upstairs. We'll deal
with you later.

I... I have no idea
where to start.

Tonight wasn't my fault.

Okay,

I know where to start.

"It wasn't my fault." Hmm...

Whose fault was it?

The guys who made the punch.

Ah.

Look, I...

I'll, I'll never do it again,
I promise.

How can you promise that

when you supposedly
have no control

over what happened tonight?

Well,
all right,

to start with, you're grounded
until further notice.

It's home, school,

church, that's all.

All right, no parties,

no after-school activities,
no anything.

Until when?

Until we can trust you again.

You can trust me, you can.

Well, right now, I think
the only thing that we can trust

is if you get
in the same situation,

that you're going
to use the same bad judgment

and come home drunk again.

You're overreacting.

And you're under-reacting.

Fine.

I'm grounded for life.

Can I go upstairs now?

Yeah.

I've been
expecting you.

I got in, didn't I?

Yup.

Both schools.

Partial scholarship to Columbia,
and full scholarship to NYU.

Congratulations, Doc.

You see,

I think the reason you didn't
want to open those envelopes

wasn't because you were afraid
you didn't get in.

You were afraid you did get in.

You've been part
of this family

forever,
and you've been going to school

in Glenoak your whole life.

And now you have
to go away,

far away, and make your way
by yourself.

You'll have a whole new group
of friends

you'll have to fit in with
and make like you.

It's kind of
overwhelming.

You knew the second

you opened those envelopes
that your future is real,

and I thought that maybe
you needed a little more time

to get used to your future.

How'd you get to be so smart?

I have no idea, but boy,

if I'm not the smartest member
of this family.

I'm going to miss you.

Yeah, you are going to miss me.

You know, you've been
throwing up most of the night,

so we haven't had
a chance to talk.

What is wrong with you, huh?

I didn't know
I was drinking alcohol.

Well, you should
have figured it out.

What kind of role model
are you trying to be?

I'm not a role model.

Yes, you are.

Sam and David
and I all look up to you.

And with Matt leaving--
and he is leaving--

you're the resident
big brother of the house.

Robbie's here,

and that's great,
but I depend on you,

and tonight, you let me down.

You let everyone down.

I'm sorry.

Is that what you want to hear?

No, I don't want
to hear anything.

What I want is for you
to stop trying so hard

to fit in with other people,

and start trying harder
to fit in around here.

I want you
to sober up for real,

and start becoming a man.

The kind of man
I can look up to.

You think Mom and
Dad will punish us
for helping Simon?

They're going to
be spending all of
their punishment

energy on Simon
for a long time.

I'm not going to hang out
with Jill and Barb anymore.

And in case I didn't say
thank you for tonight, thanks.

Making friends

has always come easily for you.

Not so much for me.

You're wrong.

Everyone likes you.

You're the nice one.

And you're the popular one.

Can we switch? Can I be you
just for a little while?

It's ironic
that you want to be me

when I've been trying to be you.

The reason
I signed up

for classes so late
was because I was afraid.

Afraid to make another mistake.

'Cause that's what I do--
I make mistakes.

But you don't make mistakes.

You do everything right.

So I thought
if I took your

classes, and if I hung out
with your friends,

I wouldn't screw up my life
this time.

Wow. That's the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.

I make plenty
of mistakes.

Jeremy, Robbie,

Robbie's brother,
Robbie's other brother,

to name a few.

I am far from perfect.

I know.

But still, I'd like
to take classes with you

if you wouldn't mind.

I wouldn't mind.

Thanks.

I really thought

that if we got through
Mary's troubles,

we'd be in the clear,

'cause all the other kids
saw what happened to Mary,

and they don't want that
to happen to them.

I don't want what happened

to Mary to
happen to me.

Don't send me
to Buffalo, please.

I-I owe you both
an apology.

Tonight was totally my fault.

I suspected that
the punch wasn't just punch,

but instead of stopping,

I kept drinking,
because

while I was drinking,

everyone accepted me
and liked me.

And I liked that.

I just wanted
to fit in so badly,

change my image,
you know, have fun.

And did you?

Did you change
your image?

Yeah.

I went from school do-gooder

to school do-gooder
who got drunk,

and he's still just a do-gooder.

I thought any image
would be better than do-gooder,

but I was wrong, I was stupid.

Then I came home,

convinced myself that
I didn't do anything wrong,

and I involved everyone
in the cover-up.

I-I never really got it,
but now I get it.

Tonight was totally

and unquestionably my fault.

I alone am to blame.

I'm so sorry.

Please don't punish everyone
for my mistake.

Punish me. Punish me
all you want.

And-and don't blame Morris.

He is a good guy.

It's not his fault
that I screwed up.

I...

I don't know what I'm gonna have
to do to gain your trust again,

but whatever it is,
I'm gonna do it.

Well, this evening just
got a little better.

You were right,
you know.

I know.

No, not just
about the party.

I just said
yes to Simon

'cause my Dad always
said no to me.

But in my own defense,
I have to say,

I really thought

that Simon was mature
enough to handle tonight.

He really has matured
so much since September.

We got to see that maturity
disappear in one night.

But you were right, too.

I only said no
to Simon because,

well, I was a little wild
in high school and college.

A lot wild.

Okay, a lot wild.

I think we were both
right and wrong.

I mean, our
intentions were good,

but our executions
were a little sloppy.

Yeah. You were more wrong.

Oh, absolutely. Oh.
Mm.

So, are we gonna punish the kids
for aiding and abetting Simon?

I think we should
not punish them,

but not tell them
until tomorrow.

That way, they'll think
they're being punished,

which will be almost
like being punished.

Parents of the year.

Nah, just parents.