7th Heaven (1996–2007): Season 2, Episode 16 - It Takes a Village - full transcript

What do you wanna tell me
that you're not telling me?

- Nothing.
- Mm.

I did speak to Morgan last night.

He was thinking that maybe,
instead of this family outing thing,

that you and Patricia
could take the kids

and let us have a guys' night out.

Just the two of us.

Just two hardworking ministry guys
just getting away from it all,

- shooting a little pool.
- What are you two really up to?

Such a suspicious mind
for such a pretty lady.

- Flattery, nice choice.
- Thank you.



Come on, I thought it'd be nice

if all the Hamiltons and Camdens
went out together.

With Matt and John graduating
this year, there's not gonna be

that many more opportunities
for all of us to see each other.

But Matt and John
aren't gonna go tonight.

They're probably coming up
with some kind of scheme right now.

If they don't wanna go, Mary and
Keesha aren't gonna wanna go either.

If the older girls don't go,
Lucy won't go.

And even if you can get
Simon and Nigel to go,

they're at that age where...

Just being seen with a family member
is a fate worse than no TV, so...

The most you and Patricia
can realistically hope for

is Lynn and Ruthie.

I guess that's all the more reason
you and Morgan should go with us.



[PRETENDING TO CRY]

All right. Go, have a good time.

Come on, it'll be a blast.

The Mint Club is
the best jazz club in the city.

It's also a 21-club and we're not 21.

We'll get in. I go all the time.

Come on, Camden.

Pick me up around 8.
You will not regret this.

What about
the big family get-together?

Come on, nobody believes
we're really gonna do that.

[BOTH SCOFF]

So I can help you after school
if you want.

That'd be great.

I'll only have an hour or so
because I have family plans.

- You know how that goes.
- An hour will be fine.

Actually, algebra is my best subject.

So if I help you tonight,
you'll have your homework done

and out of the way for the weekend.

You don't wanna ruin your weekend
suffering over algebra, do you?

Okay. Come on over. Thanks.

Who was that?

Don't get excited. He's 14.

I would have said 18.

He's good-looking,

but he's also totally stuck on himself
and kind of weird.

Weird, but good-looking.

Luce, hey, I need a favour.
It's a matter of life and death.

A matter of life and death?

My parents made me stop
seeing my boyfriend

because my grades dropped.
I gotta see him tonight.

I was wondering if you'd come with me
to the movies as my cover.

- But what about the big family outing?
- We're way too old for that stuff.

I'll get us out of it. Don't worry.
So will you do it?

Are you kidding?

A secret love,
a clandestine meeting.

I'm totally there for you.

I just hope I can ask you
to return the favour someday.

Of course.

[CHATTERING]

What now?

Not that it's any of your beeswax,

but I need Mr. Lim's opinion
on my picture.

Stop flirting with my boyfriend.

Mr. Lim isn't your boyfriend.

He's a substitute
and he's my boyfriend.

- Hi, Mr. Lim.
- Hi, Mr. Lim.

Is everything all right here, girls?

I wanted you to see my picture.

JESSICA:
Don't be late.

This is an invitation to one
of Jessica Donner's make-out parties.

- How did this happen?
- Who cares?

I can't wait to tell Nina.
Who are you gonna take?

Hi, Simon.

Did Jessica invite you
to her party tonight?

I asked her to ask you.

Yeah.

Do you wanna meet me there?

It could be, you know, kind of a date.

Sure.

Great. See you tonight.

NIGEL:
Way to go, stud.

Laura is the make-out champion
of all time.

- Hello.
- Everything's set.

Annie gave me the go-ahead.
Are we still on for tonight?

Absolutely.
I'm not about to turn back now.

Okay.
I hope you're doing the right thing.

Hello, I could use some help here.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Patricia, about tonight...

I knew you're gonna try
to back out of it.

I was just talking to Eric
and he really needs a boys' night out.

It's been a rough week.

I'll tell you what, I'm gonna offer you
the same deal I offer the kids.

Tell me what you're up to
before I catch you, I'll go easy on you.

Come on, we just wanna play pool.

Sure you do.

ANNIE:
Hi.

Mom, my friend Scott
is coming over after school

to help me with my algebra homework.
Is that okay?

Sure, but he can't stay long.
We're going out with the Hamiltons.

Well, something kind of came up.

Keesha invited me
to go to the movies with her

and I really wanna go.

Please?

Her mom's not making her
go out with you guys.

And technically,
I'll still be with one of the Hamiltons.

You know how much fun
Keesha and I always have together.

- She needs me.
- Needs you?

Yeah. Um...

Keesha just broke up
with her boyfriend

and she's feeling kind of lonely,

and doesn't feel like being around
a whole crowd of people.

Like our families.
You know how it is.

Fine, go.

But a G-rated movie only
and something close.

Keesha hasn't had her licence
that long.

Thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you a hundred million times.

Okay, what's your excuse?

I don't have one yet,
but I'll work on it.

Oh, hi.

Just to warn you,
Simon's acting weird.

Weirder than usual?

Oh, yeah. Way weird.

See you.

- Oh. What about tonight?
- Mm.

Oh, yeah. Um... John asked me to do
something better, do you mind?

- What's better?
- Just about anything.

Hey, would you like a cookie,
Simon?

No.

Are you feeling okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Mom, can I go to a party tonight?

It's okay if you say no.
I'll understand, really.

Do you wanna go to this party?

Well, it's not just what I want.
It's what you want too, Mom.

If you don't want me to go,
I'll still respect you.

I'm sure,

but you go ahead to your party.
I understand.

Thanks a lot, Mom.

[SIGHS]

How was school?

Ms. Jenkins,
the cafeteria lady, smells.

Honey, we don't say that.

Oh, sorry, Ms. Jenkins stinks.

That's not nice
and that's not like you, Ruthie.

Are you mad at somebody?

When you liked Daddy,
did anyone else like him too?

Um... Yeah, one girl did.
Her name was Rhonda.

- And she was pretty but kind of mean.
- But you got Daddy?

Well, I don't like to say got.
He's not a toy or a--

Okay, I got him. What's up?

Nothing.

Okay.
If you wanna tell me later, you can.

In the meantime, no one stinks.

What do you say, you and Lynn wanna
go out with Patricia and me tonight?

- I can't.
- Why?

Because I don't like Lynn anymore.

You're going,
and you're going to have fun.

[DOOR SLAMS]

Ow!

[DOORBELL RINGS]

LUCY:
Hi, Scott. Come on in.

I thought we'd study
in the living room.

Where no one will bother us.

Sure.

Hi.

My sister, Mary.

Yeah, yeah, I know.
I've seen you around school.

Shall we?

Fourteen.
Don't make a fool out of yourself.

Come on, you knew that Matt and I
were going when you made plans.

Fine.

Cool.

I'm gonna be honest with you.

I'm still angry about you
breaking me up with Rick,

so I don't wanna spend
a whole evening around you and Dad.

- Dad's not going.
- But I have to go?

Come on, Mom.

Remember way back
when you were my age?

Lucy and I just wanna go to a movie,
just get out on our own a little.

- Please?
- Fine.

But if you don't get your grades up
in two weeks,

you won't be seeing Lucy
or anybody else either.

Thanks.

Okay, what's your sad story?

- I got invited to a party.
- What kind of party?

One of those make-out parties?
I don't think so.

It's not a make-out party.

The girl's parents are gonna be home
the whole time.

Here's all the information,
phone numbers and all.

Simon going?

Oh, yeah, he's going.

And how are you gonna get there?

All right, tell John, he and Matt
can drop you off and pick you up.

Go.

Now, what can I do for you?

I need to know how to make a boy
fall in love with me, quick.

- How quick?
- Before Mrs. Rainy gets well.

So give me everything you got, sister.

Hey.

Listen, Mary,
I've gotta be honest with you.

I volunteered to help Lucy
with her homework

so I could get a chance
to talk to you.

- Really?
- Yeah, yeah.

I was hoping I can meet you.

Even though you know I'm 14,
you'd see I don't act 14,

and you'd maybe go out with me.
Tonight.

- Like a date?
- How about a movie?

- Okay.
- Ha.

This is great.

Why don't you pick me up
around 7:30?

Oh, I can't, because I don't drive.

Oh. I thought you did.
All right, no big deal.

- My parents can drive us.
- No. No. Um...

Why don't I meet you at the movies?

Yeah, and don't tell anyone.

Right.
Yeah, you don't wanna hurt Lucy.

Right.

And I don't really want
anyone knowing

that I'm dating
someone younger than me.

Fine.

It's a-- It's a deal and a date.

Can you give me a ride
to the movies tonight?

No, you can get a ride
with Lucy and Keesha.

I'm meeting some friends
and it's gonna be kind of awkward,

because Lucy and Keesha
don't exactly hang out

with the same group I do.

And I don't wanna drag
my little sister around.

Neither do I.

Huh. Please.

All you have to do is drop me off.
I'll get a ride home.

Okay, okay, but you owe me.

- Put it on my bill.
- Whoa.

So you're meeting some guy,
don't want Mom and Dad to see him?

That is not it at all.

You are such a bad liar.

I'm telling you the truth.

Uh-huh.

I should've done this years ago.

When I finally meet up with this guy
face-to-face,

I'm gonna let him have it
with both barrels.

Please, no gun analogies.

I'm going with you so you don't
get yourself into any real trouble.

Well, my friend, you've certainly got
your work cut out for you.

So I take it Patricia doesn't know
our mission?

- No way, she'd kill me if she did.
- Right.

You didn't tell Annie, did you?

No, she suspects I'm up to something,
but she finally stopped asking me.

There are some things
a wife doesn't need to know.

Yeah, like when you're meeting
her ex-husband.

You sure you wanna go through
with this?

Look, every year,
he calls her on Valentine's Day.

Every year. He's never missed one.

Last week included.

Doesn't seem to faze him
she's married to somebody else now.

He just keeps on calling.

And because of that call,

Patricia and I have a fight
every Valentine's Day.

Last week included.

Yeah, well, next year,
there's not gonna be a call, okay?

For the first time in our married lives,
there is not going to be a call.

Come on, let's go.

Yes, sir.

Hah. Would the rest of you guys
please roll down your windows?

What is wrong with you two?

What's with the aftershave?
What is so funny?

- Nothing.
- Good luck, you guys.

Thanks.

- I'm gonna need it.
- Yeah, me too.

What are you talking about?

They're going to a make-out party.

They better not be.

No, you guys are way too young
to start kissing girls.

Look. Just because you never got
kissed until you were old

is no reason
why we shouldn't start kissing

- while we're still in our prime.
- Okay, you guys, end of the line.

MATT:
Have fun.

- How you feeling?
- I'm cool.

Yeah, lucky you.

Please don't let my lips fail me now.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Final check.

- Chap Stick?
- Cherry, full tube.

Fresh breath?

Check. Aftershave?

[SNIFFING]

Let's just make sure
we're in a well-ventilated room.

It's not too late to run.

Hi, boys, come on in.

I really owe you
for coming with me tonight.

I don't know how to thank you.

There he is.

Luce, this is Rick.

Hey, nice to meet you.

I hope you don't mind,
but I brought a friend.

Hey, Bri, over here.

LUCY: Hi.
- Surprise.

Hey.

No kidding, surprise,
that's Brian Dunne.

He's gorgeous.
He's in my English Lit class,

and I'm not afraid to tell you
that I love him

and I love you for bringing me here.
I can't believe my luck.

Did Brian know
that I was gonna be here

or is this an ambush blind date?

He knew. Now, come on.

Our dates are waiting.

Hope you don't mind
being surprised like this.

No, not at all.

- Cool. Let's go get the tickets.
- Cool.

You know,
I'm not really allowed to date.

That's what makes this
so much fun.

Hey, we should go see
the cartoon movie.

That way, no one we know will see us,
nothing will get back to our parents.

That's fine with me.
I didn't come to see a movie.

BRIAN:
Four for the cartoon movie.

Shouldn't we wait and make sure
your friends get here before we leave?

No, they'll be here.
Don't worry, I'll be fine. Go.

You have a quarter
in case you have to call?

Yes, I have many quarters. Go.

- She's up to something.
- Yeah, I know.

But it's a something
she's hiding from Lucy and not us,

so I figure it can't be all that bad.

You sure you wanna go
to the club tonight?

We're so close to graduating
without our parents killing us.

What if we get carded
or arrested or--?

Hey, hey, Matt, just relax, man.
Trust me.

Famous last words.

Wow.

I mean, wow.

I mean, you look great.

Thanks.

Yeah,
two for Love Doesn't Matter, please.

Sure. I just need some ID, stud.

Uh... I seem to have left it
in my other jacket.

Then I guess
it's two for the cartoon movie.

- I don't mind. It's no big deal, really.
- Huh.

Ruthie, honey, you've had your coat on
the entire meal.

You've got stuff all over it.

Take it off and let me get the food off
before it gets stained.

No fair, Mommy, she's cheating.

What are you wearing?

A bra.

- Why?
- I need a more mature look.

She's just trying
to take my boyfriend.

- Am not.
- Are too.

And your chest is crooked anyway.

- You're just jealous.
- Am not.

Enough.
Now, you stop all this fighting.

Oh. Maybe this will help.

If you two can stop fighting
and be nice to each other,

we've got a surprise for you.

- We're gonna take you to a movie.
- I don't wanna go.

- Me neither.
- You're going.

And you too.

That's if we can get a check
and get out of here.

Well, it's just a cartoon.

I'm sure we're not gonna miss
any important plot points.

Do we have to go?

Yes.

[CHATTERING]
[MUSIC PLAYING]

Mom, Dad, you promised
you'd leave and go upstairs.

- Okay, okay, we can take a hint.
- Okay.

The coast is clear.

[SLOW MUSIC PLAYING]

I knew this was too good to last.

[CHATTERING]

MAN: Can I get your
friend something, John?

No, I'm just fine. Thanks.

So you ready?

- Ready for what?
- And now, ladies and gentlemen,

I'd like to introduce you to someone
we discovered here at the club.

Someone you'll be hearing a lot from
in the very near future.

Please give it up for John Hamilton.

I'll be right back.

[SINGING]
As sure as the sky is blue

And the city sounds at noon

Time is moving on

And there's no time in me

For all the negativity
Wasting energy

On who is right or wrong

Too many people dying

Too many people crying out

For someone to hear their plea

And care enough to see

I got 5 bucks says
Patricia's ex is a no-show.

You keep calling him Patricia's ex.
Isn't his name Kevin?

Did I tell you John's been singing
at a nightclub?

- Really?
- Yeah.

Aagh.

Yeah, last week, some 20-year-old

with tattoos and dreadlocks
offered him a record contract.

Of course, I didn't hear it from John.
One of my parishioners filled me in.

What about college, Tuskegee?

I want the kid to go to college,
but I want John to want it too.

He's gotta be committed.

He's gotta decide for himself
what's right.

It's tough sitting around
and watching Matt make a big decision

like what college to go to.

I was hoping if he wanted
to sing badly enough,

he'll stay in town
and go to a local school.

I'm kind of hoping Matt won't get
into an out-of-state school.

I'd like to keep my eye on him.
And my wallet.

Yeah, we don't have the money
for John to go out-of-state either.

Tuskegee's great,

but it could be rough
on the bank account

for him to be that far away.

Well, it kind of looks like
you scared Kevin off.

- Let's just go home.
- Oh, no, I'm not giving up yet.

Okay.

- Are you the Reverend Hamilton?
- Yes.

I'm Kevin, Patricia's ex-husband.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

You're 14.

ANNIE:
Excuse us.

[CHUCKLING]

That was great.
Why didn't you tell me?

Don't feel left out. Nobody knows.

Last week,
I got offered a record contract.

Wow, a record contract?
That's awesome.

- Then you won't mind helping me out?
- Sure.

Great. I knew I could count on you.

I want you to be there
when I tell my father

I don't wanna go to college next year
and I wanna pursue my music career.

Be with you when you tell your dad?
You nuts?

I don't wanna be in the same state.

Come on, you have to.

That's why I brought you,
so you can vouch for my talent.

- They've only heard me in church.
- You brought me to talk you out.

You don't think I can make it
in the music business, do you?

Well, you're wrong, because I will.
And I'll do it with or without you,

or my family or my dad
or any stupid college education,

because I'm a singer.
A good one. And I'm gonna make it.

And nobody is gonna stop me either.

I'm not stopping you.

I just don't agree with you
about the college thing.

Okay, everybody,
it's time for Seven Minutes in Heaven.

What's Seven Minutes in Heaven?

A boy and a girl go into the closet
for seven minutes.

To do what?

[LAUGHING]

Oh, boy.

Okay, who's gonna go first?

Um, we'll go first.

ALL:
Ooh...

Okay, who's got a watch?

GIRL:
Here.

Okay, you two,
you got seven minutes.

BOY:
Yeah.

ALL [CHANTING]:
Simon! Simon!

Simon! Simon!

Simon! Simon!

Simon! Simon!

I like to go first.

Yeah, good idea.

Me too.

I just like getting it over with.

Me too.

So who do you like better,
Red Lightning or The Tick?

- The Tick.
- Me too.

Last year, my dad took me
to this comics convention

and I met Ben Edlund.

You met the creator of The Tick?

Yeah, he even signed
one of my comics too.

You could come over
and see it sometime.

Cool.

You know who is almost
as cool as The Tick?

Arthur, former accountant
and sidekick to The Tick.

"Yes, I'm not a bunny,

- I'm a moth.
- I'm a moth."

Look, I'm sorry
if I took you by surprise,

but I've always wanted to meet you,
Reverend Hamilton.

Call me Morgan.

Okay. Morgan.

If you wanted to meet me,
why not come by the house?

Patty doesn't know
about the wheels.

I got drafted after we split up.
Then they sent me off to Nam,

and two months later,
shipped me home in a wheelchair.

- I'm sorry.
- Ah. It's not all bad.

I met this great nurse in rehab.
Melanie.

We got married
and I adopted her two kids.

I couldn't be happier.

If you're so happy,
then why do you still call Patricia?

Calling Patty helps me
remember a time in my life

when I was more carefree
and stupid.

She was the best thing
that ever happened to me as a kid.

And it's hard to let go of that.

Uh...

Does your wife know
you call Patricia?

Sure, but she also knows
that I love her.

And I wouldn't change
our life together for anything.

So did you bring
this guy along with you

to keep you from beating me up?

[SCOFFS]

Let me buy you two guys a beer.
Looks like you could use one.

[SIMON SIGHS]

Look.

I know you think I'm experienced

and that's why you asked me
to the party,

but if you must know,
I've never kissed a girl before.

And certainly not

for seven whole minutes
in a dark closet.

So if you wanna leave,
I'll understand.

Well, I've never been kissed
before either.

But I heard that--

You heard I made out
with a lot of boys, right?

- Yup.
- Well, I didn't.

Doug Peterson just told everyone I did
because I wouldn't kiss him.

Doesn't it bother you that people think
you did something that you never did?

No. Why should it? It's not true.

You're pretty cool.

You're pretty cool too.

So if you didn't ask me to the party
based on my kissing ability,

then why did you ask me?

Because I like you.
I think you're cute.

Oh.

Oh.

- I like you too.
NIGEL: Simon, you better come out.

- Right now.
- Not now.

Would you like to kiss me?

- You mean, your first kiss?
- Yours too.

- Oh, cool.
- Super cool.

Okay, close your eyes,
count to three, then we'll kiss.

Okay.

One, two...

Hi.

[CHUCKLING]

Come on, you two, watch the movie.

- This is better.
- Yeah.

Can you believe it?

If I saw one of my daughters
in a theatre making out like these two,

I'd send her to a convent.

I mean, this is a kid's movie,
for goodness' sakes.

Keesha?

Lucy?

MARY:
Dear God, my mom's here.

You know, you really shouldn't
call Patricia anymore.

Morgan...

You should come
by the house instead.

I know she'd love to see you again,

and if I hadn't been such a fool
all these years, you would have.

What about the kids?
Do they know about me?

I don't wanna cause
any trouble for anyone.

Yeah, yeah, they know.

Then I accept.

I'd love to see Patty, meet the kids.

Great.

- Just let me know when you're free.
- I'm free right now.

I could go home with you tonight.

Uh... Sure, that'd be great.

Unless, of course,
some other time would be better.

We don't wanna monopolize
your evening.

Nope, I'm free all night,
so tonight's great for me.

Great.

I'll just go call my wife.

We're in big trouble, you know that?

Yeah.

Mom, this may be a bad time,
but do we have to tell Dad about this?

Yeah, do we?

They're as good as told.

[GIGGLING]

Well, the evening is not
a total waste.

At least
Ruthie and Lynn are friends again.

Ah-ah. You can run,
but you can't hide.

I'll take hiding for now.

But, you know, Mom, technically,
aside from making out,

I really didn't do anything wrong.

Oh, well, then,
this may sound harsh to you.

To start with, you're
on house probation for three months.

If you can stay out of trouble
for that long,

I might consider letting you
out of the house before you turn 21.

But if you so much
as cross the line once,

I'm gonna have you lowjacked.

Got it? Good.

What she said and probably more.

Okay.

But can we just not call any attention
to the fact that I'm being punished

and not tell Dad?

- Please?
- I don't hide things from your father.

That goes double for me. Upstairs.

Come on, Mom,
just consider how you'd feel.

- What if you were me?
- Go.

Lowjacked?

I'm sorry for back at the club, man.
I was way out of line.

This is my mess
and I have no right to drag you into it.

But you can really sing.

Thanks. That means a lot.

Hey, I found out, man, last month,
that Tuskegee wants me.

- Early acceptance.
- Congratulations, that's excellent.

Can't you do
your music thing there?

Not really.

Company that offered me
the record deal is small and local.

How about a local college?
You can work on a record contract

- and go to school.
- If I go anywhere in state,

then I'll be forced to live at home
to save money.

And I don't know if I can do that.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

I'm praying I only get accepted
to an out-of-state school.

I'll have to get
a scholarship and a job.

Maybe two jobs,
plus a student loan to afford it.

But it'll be worth it
just to be on my own for a change.

Yeah.

So, boys-- I mean, men,
how did it go?

I can never come to another party
at Jessica's house again.

- But I can.
- Jessica's dad calling Mom and Dad?

He didn't mention that when he was
yelling at me, so probably not.

You don't think he'd do that, do you?
Do you?

It depends. Start talking.

We got a little surprise
for you, honey.

Look who we bumped into
at the pool hall.

Surprise.

It's me. Kevin.

Your...?

A little shocked?

Yeah.

Uh-- But...

Oh, my God, Kevin,
it is so good to see you.

Hey, I'm sorry my parents were late.

- I hope you don't get in trouble.
- No, don't worry.

I'm pretty sure my parents
will be focused on Lucy tonight.

Hey, want a ride?

Thanks for the movie. I think
I'll catch a ride home with my brother.

That's cool.

Fourteen. You're 14.

You know, maybe this wasn't
such a good idea.

Oh.

Well, yeah. I'll still see you at school.

Yeah, and remember,
this date is our little secret.

Sure.

Secret. You bet.

What are you doing here?

We dropped Simon and Nigel off
at the house

and circled back to find out
who your date was.

MATT: Isn't that kid Lucy's friend?
- Shut up, okay?

Are you so desperate
you're dating 14-year-olds now?

Not anymore.

Oh. Mary, look.

Your date's parents are waving at us.
That is so sweet. Wave.

Fine.

Keep it up and I won't tell you
what happened with our moms

and Lucy and Keesha.

Spill it.

Okay, here's the short version.

Lucy and Keesha were making out
in the movies with two guys

and Mom and Mrs. Hamilton
caught them.

What? Making out?

Lucy? Our Lucy?

Keesha? My little sister, Keesha?

Mm-hm.

I can't tell you how great it was
seeing you after all these years.

You're as kind and gentle
and big-hearted

as you were the day we met.

[CHUCKLING]

I'm so glad you finally got
a chance to meet the kids.

I'm just sorry
you didn't get to see my oldest, John.

- Maybe another time.
- Yeah, I promise.

You guys just missed
meeting my first husband.

Oh, that's too bad.

- I can't believe he called.
- Well, he did.

A make-out party?

Okay, what's going on?

I didn't do anything. I swear.

At this moment, Nigel,
no matter what you did,

your father's in more trouble
than you are.

Cool.

Why don't you boys
go into the kitchen and get a snack?

Morgan, Eric, why didn't you tell me
you wanted to meet my ex-husband?

I would've gladly arranged it.

I think I'm gonna let
Morgan answer that.

Ha. A true friend to the end.

- I can't believe you two are this dumb.
- Exactly.

Wanna get a bad reputation
before you even start dating?

Brian would never tell anyone
what we did.

Yeah, Rick either. He's a gentleman.

What planet are you from?

Because here on Earth,
guys tell other guys everything.

Even if you do nothing,
they still tell everyone you did.

How do you know that?

Hello? We're guys.

I don't even know
what you two were thinking.

I told you guys it was a bad idea
making out with girls at your age.

It wasn't totally bad.

It wasn't bad at all.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello?

It's Scott.

Uh... Tell him I'm not here,
I already went to bed.

Uh, she already went to bed,
but I'll tell her you called.

Yup, bye.

So you're dating
some geek in Lucy's class?

What were you thinking?

[GIGGLING]

I like me better this way.

Yeah, you look more adult.

Thanks for helping me.
You're a good friend.

[GIGGLING]

MATT: So we're clear,
we don't ever wanna find out

that you and Keesha are making out
at the movies.

JOHN: Or anywhere else.
LUCY: No more making out.

KEESHA: Okay, okay.
Just stop lecturing us.

Jeez, you're worse than Dad.

LUCY:
Yeah. Way worse.

[WHISPERING] When exactly
were you going to tell us

that our daughters were making out
at the movies?

When you told us
what you were doing.

Well, I don't think
we need to get involved.

No, Matt and John are doing
a pretty good job.

When do you wanna talk
to the boys about college?

Maybe we could go out
next Friday night.

You know,
guys' night out with our sons.

Matt and John should just
talk to each other about college.

I agree.
They'll make the right decision.

- I hope so.
- Me too.

But if it's the wrong decision...

- Could we go out with them then?
- No.

Never.

KEESHA:
We don't need you to yell at us.

LUCY:
Yeah, we've got parents.

MATT:
They don't know anything.