3 Below (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 8 - Party Crashers - full transcript

An incoming message from Akiridion-5 alarms Vex. Meanwhile, the arrival of bounty hunters ruins the royals' outing in the woods with friends.

♪♪ Theme music playing...

♪ One, two, three, below! ♪

Season 01 Episode 08
Episode Title: "Party Crashers"

Go. Hunt.

You would be proud of Aja.

She gamely faced a dangerous bounty hunter
and emerged victorious in battle,

and received a B-plus
on her English paper.

That's a language here, and B is a letter.

It seemed very important to her.

Commander Vex,
there appears to be a cat-like creature...

Varvatos Vex is in the midst of a debrief.

As for Krel, Varvatos believes

he is begrudgingly starting to acclimate
to this dump heap...

Unknown being attempting
to breach perimeter.

Permission to vaporize?

If there is to be any vaporization,
it shall be done by Varvatos!

It's been too long
since he killed something.

Intruder alert.

A "cat-like creature," indeed.

Hardly worthy of Varvatos' attention.

Lord and Lady Tarron,
can you hear me?

-Lieutenant Zadra?
-Can you hear me?

Intruder alert.

Intruder alert.

Prince and Princess Tarron,
can you hear me?

Varvatos hears you, Lieutenant,

and is grateful
to discover you're not dead!

If you can hear me,
there was a traitor on Akiridion-5.

Sweet Seklos, this blasted...

Beta, step aside!

Their shields are too strong, brother.

Then we must devise another
means of attack.

If you can hear me,
I know the identity of the traitor.

I know the identity of the traitor.

With four words, the Palchuk
is gonna make your dreams come true.

Me. You. Bon. Fire.

What's a bonfire?

Without me? Exactly.

Can I bring my little brother?

What? No!

Besides, my Vespa only carries two.

Oh! This is a local courting ritual.

You are asking me on a date.

What? No!

Maybe. It's a group thing.

Okay, then.
I have to go somewhere else now.

Okay. I'll, uh, I'll pick you up at 7:00
on my Vespa for the group thing!

Little brother, sorry I can't work
on the daxial array tonight.

The blond and primitive oaf
asked me to go to a bon-bon fire party.

Aha! He has what the humans
call a "crush" on you.

Of course!

I must have crushed something
when I kicked him in the face.

Human dating customs are very strange.

Listen to my voice, Steve. I've matured.

And mature people go into the woods

and hunt the legendary
Arcadian Billycraggle.

According to myth, legend,
and the Internet,

that's when the Billycraggle emerges
from its cave!

Hush your manly voice!

No creeper talk around the plebes.

Psst! Krel, let's hang out tonight.
It'll be a bros' night.

Why? I'm not your brother.

Bros. Dudes. On the hunt for adventure!

We'll do guy stuff, become best friends,
and share all our secrets.

I'll go first.

I wet the bed until eighth grade.

Okay, now you go.

Another perfect test, Mr. Tarron.

I don't know how you do it.

Everyone knows Ms. Janeth
only gives out one A-plus.

That was always mine
before you came here.

And now you get Bs.

Yeah, I suggest embracing the change.

I'll meet you at 7:00!
Wear comfortable shoes.


-What is that?
-Just a second, dear, I'm trying to...

Oh, Lucy, it's our little princess's
first party!

-Now, don't you be nervous, honey bunny.
-I'm not nervous.

What do you know about being nervous?
You're robots. Ugh.

This one's for the scrapbook.

Just be home by curfew, little lady,
or you'll be grounded.

Grounded. Fresh ground pepper.
Add a kick to your salad!

More to the point,

if you are not home in time,
your human forms will wear off.

- Ugh.
- Unknown being

attempting to breach perimeter.

-Permission to vaporize.
-Permission granted.

No, no, no, no! Don't vaporize my date.

I mean, my... I mean, the Palchuk.

-Why are you acting so strange?
-Oh, kleb!

You've attended enough royal court galas
to handle one Earth date.

Hey, put her there, son.

Heck of a grip you've got there, pal.

Now let's discuss your intentions
towards my princess.

I don't want to hear about any hanky-panky
up on Lovers Lane. Capisce?

Nope. No hanky or panky,
Mister-sir, and ma'am!

Your mate is taking a gamble

broadcasting on an intergalactic
walkie-talkie like this.

Anyone can trace the signal. Not good.

The information Lieutenant Zadra
is in possession of

-must warrant such a risk.

What sort of info does she have?

Varvatos does not know,

hence why he is here seeking your aid.

What do you think it is? Bounty hunters?

Morando's plans?

How to get salsa stains out of terrycloth?

Because I've got this terrycloth apron...

Varvatos fears it might be
the identity of a traitor.

Someone close to the royal family
disabled the force shields,

enabling Morando and his forces
to attack the palace.

Of all the great houses to betray!

How could they? The villainy! The evil!

Perhaps he has a perfectly
legitimate reason?

Come on, Vexy!

There's no good reason
to betray those kids or their parents!

Varvatos is certain
the traitor is tortured by regret.

Only a fool would listen
to the likes of Morando.

We need to fix this, pronto.

Lieutenant Zadra needs to hunt down
and rip the traitor's head off,

and I shall help.

Whoever had the gall
to aid such an attack,

we will have him or her exposed,
disemboweled, and dishonored.


♪ Oh, give me a home ♪

♪ Where the buffalo roam ♪

♪ Where the deer and the... ♪

Welcome to the... bonfire?

-Wow! It's so beautiful and warm...
-♪ Where seldom is heard... ♪

I just want to hug it.

Whoa! Watch out.

Fire is hot and dangerous.

Like me.


♪ Home, home on the range... ♪

Yeah! Ooh!

♪ Where the deer
and the antelope play... ♪

-Guess we're not dancing?

Don't sweat it. Maybe they will later.

How about a s'more?

Some more what?

Oh! Oh.

I'll go find the marshmallows.

Wait, you're with Steve?

Are you like together-together?

Why are you repeating yourself-self?

OMG! Steve and Aja.

You can be Staja!

Or Ajeeve! No, no, no, Staja.
Let's stick with Staja.

I'll just keep my own name, thanks.

Hey, are you having a good time, Aj?

- Mm.

Not really.

- This might be my first and last date.
- Your last date?

No! We just made Staja a thing!

You can't break up with him yet.

The secret to a great date
is just to be yourself.

Of course. Who else would I be?

Speaking of dates, where's your Toby-pie?

T.P. and Claire went with Jim
to visit his Uncle Marlin or something.

Boring! That's so lame.

It was a dark night.

Not unlike tonight.

Two campers were lost in the deep woods...

when suddenly they heard a rustling!

The campers rushed into the thicket,
only to face the Billycraggle!

What's a Billycraggle?

Half billy goat, half craggle,

with the horns of a ram
and the breath of a lunch lady.


But it wasn't always that way.

The Billycraggle started out
as a lost camper.

Are we lost?

I don't like the "outdoors."

-Everything is covered in dirt.

According to myth, legend,
and the Internet,

the Billycraggle only appears
when the Dog Star is at its brightest.

And that only happens
once a century?

You don't believe this Billycraggle
actually exists, do you?

Trust me.

Anything is possible in this town.

What was that?

Don't worry. I have experience dealing
with creatures of an unknown origin.

Eli, don't!

We come in peace.

I'm Eli, friend to creepers!

-Eli, that's not a friend!

Eli, friend.

You, creeper.

What the... I knew it!

Are you all right?

-Do you know who that was?
-In fact, I do.

We just faced the Billycraggle!

...he looked at me. Boom!

The Billycraggle is in the woods!

Run for your lives

before he eats your face
and makes your intestines fluffy!

You're a little late.
Steve already told the Billycraggle story.

The Billycraggle is real, you guys!

Krel saw him, too.

Where is my sister and the blond oaf?

You mean Staja.

They're probably sitting in a tree

So, uh, this is the tree
that I told you about.


Look at all the wooden arms.

There must be dozens!

Pretty romantic, huh?

We don't have trees on Akirid...
I mean, Cantaloupia.

Oh. Desert climate. Cool.


- Aja?
- Trees are the best!

-Why do you hide them in forests?

Hey, wait for the Palchuk!

You are fast.

Whoa! You are not like other girls,
are you?

Are these stars?

No. They're fireflies.

The universe...

I forgot how vast it is.

Back home, Zadra would tell us stories
about the universe.

-She, um, worked for my parents.

Oh, like your babysitter?

She would never sit on babies,
but she was tough,

and she told us stories
about beings on other planets.

Yeah, like those exist.

It always sounded so... adventurous.

You see that super bright star?

That's called the Dog Star.

And that star is the Cat Star.
And that big one...

that's the Elephant Star.

You're making those up.

No, I swear on the, uh, Platypus Star.

You're glowing.

I am?

No. You're like glowing,

Oh, no!

I've gotta go. Thanks. Bye!

How could I have been so stupid?



Aja, you dropped your... protractor?

Krel! We have a problem. A bad one.

Great Gaylen!
We should've listened to Mother.

Don't ever tell her you said that.

Ugh, make that two problems.

- Zerons?
- Yes.

My serrator! I must've dropped it
when I was in a tree with Steve.

Were you K-I-S-S-ing?

No! We need to keep the Zerons
away from the bonbon party.

And survive.

Good idea.

We're getting close.

Try moving that wire thing over there.

Your pants are ringing.

-A-hoy! This is Lucy Blank.

I have Mother on the horn for you.

Commander Vex, the heirs
have not returned to the Mothership.

Our little princess is on a date!

it's a "group thing,"

but by my calculations,

their transductions
will have already faded.

Are you telling Varvatos Vex

that the princelings
are about to expose their true forms

to a group of loose-lipped teenagers?

Rewind that, Lucy.
She's on a date with who?

No way!
But she kicked him in the face!


Lieutenant Zadra!
Zadra, it is Varvatos Vex.

Can you read me?

Yes, ma'am, I did!

Okay, Lucy, I've gotta go.

Aja and Krel can't go all light show
in the woods.

Commander Vex,
the royals need you right now.

Where is the girl?

Oh, she's, um, hanging
around here somewhere.


No, no, no!

Cute. They're trying to fight.


I told you! The Billycraggle is real!

I knew I smelled lunch-lady breath.

-Steve! Steve!

We need to clear the area.

The Billycraggle
is not like our other friends.

The Billycraggle isn't real, Pepperjack.

Sounds real to me.

- But Aja!
- She's fine. She's with Krel. Let's go!


-Give me the serrator.
-Then I'll be defenseless.

At least you can throw a punch.

Now climb!

I do not like this Mother Nature.
I prefer the Mothership.



What gloober invented trees?

Those trees are saving
your lower posterior right now,

and they are majestic!

That serrator would come in handy
right about now.

- Time to shred.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.

I've been wanting to play one of those.

You can't have the serrator
and the guitar.

Not the guitar!

Three against two.

You don't stand a chance.


They can't run. Move in.

Krel, where are you? Help!

- Krel?


But what are you doing here, Luug?

Do you still like trees now?

That's not funny!

-And you need to get out of here.
-Not without you.

Nice shot, Luug!

You dropped your weapon.

Drop yours.

The royal heirs are under the protection
of Varvatos Vex!

You always wanted
a glorious death, Varvatos.

-He can't take on all three.
-Let's even the score.

Vex, shield!


You two need to get back to Mother.

You can't take
all three of them alone.

She's right, Vex. Give up.

You do not hurt them!

Varvatos Vex protects the Tarron Family...

with his life!



We almost died,
but, hey, a Zeron got fried.

Is that from Steve?

Ugh, sweet Seklos!
The Staja is a thing now.

♪ Staja, Staja, makes me wanna... ♪

There's nothing that rhymes with Staja.

Yeah! Smiley face!

Ha, ha!

It was a date!


What the...

My protractor does not do this!

- Princess Aja? Prince Krel...
- Lieutenant Zadra.

-Where are the royal heirs?
-They are safe.

-Where exactly are they?
-This is not a secure transmission,

but Varvatos Vex swears on his life
that the children...

You are a traitor, Commander.
I trusted you,

and the king and queen trusted you,
and you betrayed them.

Will you stand by my side one last time,

my friend?

I will, my king.

I know it was you, Vex.
Protect my children.

-Please let Varvatos explain.
-Save your words.

If you cause the royal heirs any harm,

then I promise to make your death
slow, painful,

and without glory.

I am coming for you!

Was that long enough?
Were you able to follow the signal?

The royals are on a derelict planet
called Earth.

Good. We'll need a ship,

and then we'll kill the traitor.

♪♪ Theme music playing...