Zits (1988) - full transcript
A group of middle school students start selling fake military plans to the KGB to pay for their music teacher's eye operation.
Hi, I'm Erskine.
I live here in Washington, DC.
My dad's a congressman.
My hobby is interviewing people.
I can get anyone to talk.
My friends and I play
in a string quintet.
But our dream is to be a band.
Hi, my name's
Hoggy Livingstone.
I'm 13 and three quartersgoing on 13 and five sixths.
I look young, but I talk old.
I live in Georgetown with mymother and her new husband
and her cat, which
I'm allergic to,
and his two kids, which
I'm also allergic to.
My name is Oscar Opily.
I've just entered
the terrible teens.
I'm an army brat.
My father works with
for the Joint Chiefs
here in Washington.
He's in charge of developingan anti-tank-guided missile
destroyer with an anti-destroyerguided missile tank.
So your
parents are divorced?
Well, isn't everyone's?
I mean, let's face
facts, Erskine.
Divorce is one of America'sgreat institutions.
Instead of two parents
who fight all the time,
you wind up with four whocompete for your affection.
Out of the mouth of babes.
My name is Newton Robinson.
My parents call me
Newton as in fig newton.
My friends call me Fig,
also as in fig newton.
I'm 13 years old.
My father's an architect.
When I grow up, I
want to be like him.
I want to be an
architect, a Democrat,
and make six figures,
whatever that means.
The fact of the matter is,I don't have an actual name.
Hoggy, here, who more
or less invented me,
says I'm your typical parent.
In any given situation,
I spout the cliches
that parents usually rely onto get their point across.
My first name is Denver, asin the capitol of Colorado.
My last name is Deck, as
in "all hands on deck".
In case you're interested, Iwas named Denver because that's
where I was conceived.
My father was campaigningthere, and he took my mom
along on his expense account.
My name is Zelda Maple.
My friends call me Zelda.
My students call me Miss Maple.
In theory, I am a part-timemusic teacher in this school,
but what I really do is organizethe sounds that come out
of your instruments
so that it offends
the least number of people.
My mother's had threehusbands, at different times,
naturally.
Polyandry is when they overlap,you have them all at once.
It's also known as group sex.
Your mother
had three husbands?
She's on her third one now.
He's the Secretary
of something or other
in the president's cabinet.
Do you have any otherhobbies besides the cello?
I build and flyremote-control model planes.
Who are you doing this
interview for, Erskine?
Erskine, what's this for?
Who are you doing the
interview for, Erskine?
What's the interview for?
Hey, Erskine, do
you mind telling me
what this interview is for?
It's me, the famous Erskine.
And as for who I'm doing
these interviews for,
I'm doing it for the fun of it.
After all these years,you're still flat, Denver.
Would it be too much to askyou to give me a middle A?
You're getting warmer.
Warmer.
Stop.
And one, two, three, four.
Well, I have an
announcement to make.
It wasn't nearly as bad as Ithought it was going to be.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Feeling so lonely, nobody'sthere to understand.
Darkness around you,want someone to hold you.
You can't hide your eyes,
drop that bold disguise.
Then you'll finally see,
what we're here for.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Come on, take your
best shot, go for it.
I'm feeling red hot, go for it.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Oh god, I think this
is it, my first zit.
Do you see it?
You want my
professional opinion?
There's absolutely
nothing there.
Anyway, everyone knows
you can't have zits
unless you have pubic hair.
What makes you think
I don't have pubic hair?
I just assumed.
Well, you just assumed wrong.
Well, don't get uptight.
We need to hear it.
I've had my punctuation already.
Punctuation?
My period, dumb-dumb.
I ovulate.
So are you guys into
masturbation yet?
You know, you ask a lot
of questions for a girl.
Look it, if we're
going to be a quintet,
not to mention a
rock group, we've
got to be open with each other.
Relationships should
be based upon honesty.
Anyway, it's no federal
crime not to masturbate.
Well, I masturbate.
Oh yeah, me too, me--
too?
Well, I, uh, guess I do too.
Likewise.
Likewise what?
I--
Say it.
I masturbate.
Masturbation makes you deaf.
What?
I said masturbation
makes you deaf.
What did you say?
You look pretty grim.
Because of
Monday-morning blues.
Oh.
I wish school would
start on Tuesday.
Yeah, it'd end on Thursday.
Yeah, which would leave
us a four-day weekend.
Hoggy, Fig, wait up!
Hey, how are you guys doing?
well, she heard--
What's going on here?
Look, there's Oscar.
What's everyone
whispering about?
Haven't you heard?
Haven't we heard what?
Miss Maple got
mugged last night.
Oh, my god, what she hurt?
Was she ever.
The mugger threw some
kind of acid in her face
and nearly blinded her.
She's going to
need an operation.
What a bitch.
Where is she?
She's at the
Memorial Hospital.
How you
doing, Miss Maple?
Who's that?
It's me, Newton Robinson.
Newton?
Oh, Newton, I'm doing
just fine, I suppose,
all things considered.
It must be hard notbeing able to see and all.
Denver-- yes, it's
hard, but I just
thank the good lord they didn'tdo anything to my hearing.
Bye, Miss Maple.
How could anybody
mug Miss Maple?
We absolutely have todo something to help her.
She's a part-time teacher.
She has no health insurance.
We're talking about taking
up a collection for her.
The operation costs $100,000.
How are we going to get ourhands on that kind of bread.
Bread doesn't grow
on trees, you know?
Money neither.
Poor Miss Maple.
How can we help her?
Yeah what a bitch.
Watch out, everybody,
I think he's getting
another one of his brainstorms.
23, 24, 25,
26, 27 28, 28.50, 29.
One of the adults
must have passed
himself off as a student.
Well, that leaves
only $99,971 to go.
There's got to be a wayfor us to make big bucks.
What about computer crime?
People make millions that way.
I hate computers.
I don't hate computers.
I just don't understand
how they work.
I mean, how can you
do addition if you
don't have fingers to count on?
What if we was to writea book for kids about sex.
We could talk about femaleejaculation, multiple orgasms,
the g-spot, that sort of thing.
Everything you wanted
to know but the parents
wouldn't tell you.
What's a multiple organism?
No, it's orgasm,
Oscar, not organism.
It's what women
have that men can't.
No, no, a book
would take too long.
We'd have to research
it, then we'd
have to write it, wait forthe publisher to publish it.
Yeah, but I mean, theresearch part could be fun.
You got a dirty mind, Hoggy.
All this talk about sex isgoing to give me heart failure.
Then you'll be sorry.
What we need is somethingwe can sell to someone.
I got it.
All we got to do
to get some money--
sell secrets.
Secrets, what secrets?
Like the guys in movies.
They secrets to the Russians.
I still think sexresearch would be more fun.
We make up secrets.
Since what we'll be
selling is secret,
they can never know if
it's made up or not.
Erskine may be
on to something.
How would we contact themso they wouldn't know they
were dealing with adolescents?
That's easy.
We'd use dead-letter drops.
But-- I don't get it.
A dead-letter drop is
a secret hiding place,
like behind a radiator in apublic building, or in a hole
in a tree in the park.
You leave the letter there,you tell them you've left it.
They come, pick it up,leave money in its place.
They never see us,
we never see them.
Then we secretly donate
the money to Miss Maples
so she can get
her eyesight back.
I think it's humongous,being spies for the Russians.
Let's put it to a vote.
All those in favor,
raise their hands.
It's settled then.
The sins of commission
have become spies.
All right, there's our dude.
The thing to do is splitup so he doesn't notice us.
All right, Hoggy,
you and Oscar follow
him from across the street.
Denver and I and Newtonwill follow him from behind.
All right, whatever
you do, act natural.
He's a closet American.
Come on.
Come on!
I don't get it.
What do you think he's doing?
There's only one
way to find out.
Nah, you wouldn't
have the guts.
I dare you.
Well, wait a minute.
What are you going to do ifhe doesn't speak English?
What a bitch.
Go ahead.
My name is
Vladimir Timoshenko.
I am 37 years of age.
And I am a first secretaryin a Soviet Embassy
here in Washington.
Here's my question.
What are you doing in the park?
Why aren't you at the embassydoing whatever secretaries do?
I suppose there is noharm in answering you that.
After all, you're
just a small child.
I am in charge of analyzingthe American public opinion.
And every once in a while,I get into my blue jeans
and chew gum, listen to
Bette Midler, and make
believe that I am
an American so I
can understand what goes onin those capitalist heads
of yours.
And you, sonny boy, who are youdoing this interview for, heh?
Get a hold of this.
It's a photo of
the Sergeant York
ground-to-air missile system.
Uh-uh uh-uh.
Here's a new Isrealiautomatic rapid-fire rifle
that's replacing the
Uzi submachine gun.
Would you leave aphotograph of the control
panel of a Minuteman
Intercontinental
Ballistic Missile silo?
I've got the best yet.
A cross-section diagram
of the new Abrams
main-line battle tank.
No.
What do you
have against the Abrams
main-line battle tank?
I don't have anything againstAbrams main-line battle tank.
It's just that if we can
waltz right into a store
and buy a picture
of it, you can bet
the Russians have alsowaltzed right into a store
and bought a picture of it.
Erskine's right.
I never thought of that.
Well, then where are wegoing to get our secrets from?
What we need is some
place with pictures
of military equipmentthat the Russians wouldn't
even think of looking for.
Oh, look at that.
What about this?
Denver, Mohawk 4B-150?
Denver, look.
Stealth F-19 Fighter.
I think we got us our secret.
And that completesthe tail section.
Where'd you learn todo that kind of stuff, Fig?
I told you when
you interviewed me.
I want to be like my father.
I picked it up watching him.
What is it
with you and zits?
You'd think it was
leprosy or something.
Zits worse than leprosy.
It's like having anadvertisement over your head
that says "adolescent".
Nobody takes a kid
with zits seriously.
You got to learn to
take it in your stride.
Easy for you to say.
You don't even have any zits.
You're doing it again.
Doing what again?
You're staring at my boobs.
You're almost as obsessed withthem as you are with zits.
You're accusing me of
staring at your boobs?
It's nothing to be ashamed of.
It's the kind of thingthat can happen to anyone.
Hey, guys, what do you think?
What I think is the
Russians will pay plenty
to get their hands on this.
It's humongous, Newton.
How much do you think
we can ask for it?
I'm going
to be real careful.
You see, if we ask
for too little,
they might be suspiciousthat the plans aren't real.
But if we ask for too much, theymight not be able to afford it.
Hey, what in the heck
did you do that for?
Well, we give them half, andwe tell them we'll give them
the other half for 25 big ones.
Then we sit back and waitand see what they give us.
25 big ones.
Did anybody ever tellyou you're very original?
For a boy.
He's reading
the note again.
He's thinking about it.
He's getting up.
He's having second thoughts.
Oh wait, he's hesitating.
He's starting for the statue.
He's walking towards the statue.
He swallowed the bait!
Yes!
Pervert!
25 big ones.
That is not peanuts.
Yes, but if this is
genuine, the thin man
will be very pleased.
I want his identity.
I want his name, his
age, his religion,
his connections, his
habits, his weaknesses,
his past, his present.
Along with the
payment, they have
to include a personal
note complimenting him
on the high quality
of his information.
We must play this new
spy with great skill.
They can do this or
I can do it myself.
Good lord.
The identity of
the thin man is one
of the most closely-guardedsecrets in the Soviet
military establishment.
But we do know his
name is Victor, sir.
We don't know his age.
We don't know what
he really looks like.
All we know for
sure is that he is
the mastermind behind
Soviet espionage
activity in North America.
Now, do we really
know that he's thin?
No, at least not
from that picture.
Well, maybe he stoppedjogging around the Kremlin.
So we're looking for aperhaps formerly thin man
named Victor
something, who might
have jogged around the Kremlin.
Jesus-- what other gems
do you have for me?
Our source in Moscow, theman who took that photograph is
fairly certain that the thin mancomes to America to personally
de-brief his key agents.
Chances are, sir,
he's passing himself off
as a businessman or
a tourist, someone
who could come over for a fewdays and not arouse suspicion.
Good lord.
Gentlemen, our worstnightmares are coming true.
The thin man has amaster spy in Washington.
He's already given him theplans for the Stealth jet,
a plane so secret we don'teven publicly admit it exists.
Well, the way I see
it is if this spy got
his hands on the Stealth,God knows what other secrets
he'll give away.
What a bitch.
I'll get my people to compilea list of everyone who had
access to the Stealth plant.
What good will that do?
The names will run
into the hundreds.
I don't care if they
run into the thousands.
Put this onto the front burner.
I want every Russian who stickshis nose out of that embassy
followed day and night.
Oh, what I wouldn't give
for one good snapshot
of the thin man's face.
We've been checking outthe dead letter drop for a week
now.
If there's nothing
there, it must
mean they didn't fall for it.
I know.
Denver?
Denver?
Denver?
What do you say, Denver?
What do you say, Morgan?
What about us taking
a flick Saturday?
Thanks, but I've
seen it already.
How do you know if you'veseen it if I didn't see
what flick I want to go see?
Whenever flick you want togo see, I've seen it already.
Anyway, I'm going to themovies with Erskine here.
What ya doin, Denver,
robbing the cradle?
You need someone witha little more experience.
Don't you read the
newspapers, dummy?
The only ones really
safe to fool around with
are the certified virgins.
Yeah?
He looks like a
certified virgin.
Hey, come on guys, here we go.
What did you have to
go and say that for?
There's nothing wrong
with being a virgin.
It's very wonderful peoplehappen to be virgins.
Me, for example.
Did you catch those zits?
I hope they're not contagious.
Morgan's a pathetic nerd.
I already been to the
movies with him twice.
All he wants to
do is feel me up.
Feel you up as in feel you up?
He doesn't
believe in foreplay.
What's foreplay?
When you talk
before you touch.
I'm not ready to be felt up yet.
Erskine, I gotta
ask you something,
and I want a straight answer.
No bullshit, promise?
Yeah, promise.
How do you see
our relationship?
Is that what we have?
I mean it, Erskine.
Puberty is a difficult
period for a girl.
She has a right to
know what to expect,
and how soon she can expect it.
All right, we belong
to the same rock group
and the same quintet
and the same spy ring.
Erskine, I'm not talking aboutour professional relationship.
I'm talking about our
personal relationship.
Our personalrelationship is humongous.
Humongous?
You're doing it again, Erskine.
Doing what?
You're zeroing in
on my boobs again.
I am, aren't I?
Whenever you're
ready, I'm ready.
Wait a minute, I thought youweren't ready for that kind
of thing yet.
When Morgan paws me atthe movies it's one thing.
When a friend puts his
hand on your heart,
well, that's different.
I think I'll
take a rain check.
Look at those dudes, will ya?
What a bonehead I am.
I should have thought of that.
They put something in thedead letter drop, all right.
But they're watching to seewho's going to pick it up.
And our dudes are watchingtheir dudes watching.
I think we should
move a little closer.
Cinderella six,
any sign of the pick up yet?
Cinderella nine, no, joy.
Mr. Balloon man,can I have a balloon, please?
Get
rid of those damn kids.
Geesh,even the station chief's here.
Which one?
The chauffeur.
Cinderellafour, get a shot of him,
please.
All Cinderellas,
stay on your toes.
Erskine, how are we going toget it without them seeing us?
--three four.
Can't deny I was sure I wouldknow baby when it was my time.
They would jump, I would
shake my head no, baby.
Then you came out of nowhere,you've got me into your sights.
We just came in right there,oh how you changed my life.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you've got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm falling in love.
All along I was sure theywould be the same as the rest--
Timoshenko!
I was wrong 'cause a feelingshot through me and I confess,
the things you do to make mesay your name like a prayer--
You ought to be ashamed
of yourself, young man.
--cause you spoke and I look,and right there, bullseye,
you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you got
my heart, bullseye--
It's not my day.
Maybe it is my day after all.
You mean our day, comrade.
24,200--
29--
- 24,300--
30--
24,400, 24,500, 24,600--
30.50--
- 24,700--
- 31--
24,800--
31.25--
24,900--
31.26, 31.27--
25,000
31 dollars and 27 cents.
Dollars?
Dollars.
Since when have we
made playing classical?
I realize that.
A little bit of all right!
We got it.
We did it!
25 big ones.
Who would have believed it?
There's more where this came
from.
Yeah!
Woo!
All right!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Comrade.
Russians always call people thatthey're tight with "Comrade".
It mean something
like "soul brother."
No one never called
me "comrade" before.
No one's ever calledme "soul brother" before.
Read the part where they
promote us to Lieutenant
Colonel in the KGB.
Read the part about us gettingthe order of the red star.
I like the bit
about the health
insurance plan for spies.
Jeez, I haven't even
started working yet,
and I got health insurance.
We've got to plan ournext step very carefully.
The thin man,
he'll be furious.
How could we know some kidswould play decadent rock music?
It's decadent
but it's beautiful.
Let us hope that
this new spy of ours
will keep in touch
with us again, hmm?
Timoshenko!
Be so kind to pass me a straw.
We thought we
were on to something
when the Russians
staked out the park,
but some kids staged an
impromptu rock concert.
Whoever it was the Russianswere waiting for never showed.
The spy was scared
off with the rock music.
Well, I would be too.
If there's somethinghumorous in this situation,
I would appreciate it if
you'd let me in on it.
There's a Russian spy
out there somewhere.
You've got to nail him!
Hey Erskine, how many timesdo you plan to interview me?
Until you
get to the real you.
All right, what's the
single thing you're most
afraid of in the whole world?
That I'll end up with a chestas flat as an ironing board.
My mom says not to worry, thatshe was a late bloomer too,
but I'm not taking any chances.
I give them all the
encouragement I can.
What do you mean?
Well, every morning I sit-infront of the mirror for five
minutes and I talk to them.
Grow, titties, grow!
Grow titties, grow!
Last time
I interviewed you,
you said your mother wasworking on her third husband.
What effect does
this have on you?
None whatsoever.
If you want to know the truth,my parents fought so much,
it was a relief
when they separated.
They're perfectly
happy living apart.
They get along
better now than they
did when they were married.
Just the other
day, when my father
came to take me to lunch, hewas very friendly with my mom.
And when he left, he--
And when he left?
When he left, he shook handswith her, if you must know.
Well, what'swrong with shaking hands?
Don't you see?
He didn't kiss her.
It means it's all
over between them!
Holy shit!
I don't believe this!
Ah!
Die!
Die!
Die!
Hey!
What's that?
What's that?
I think we
got another secret.
Hold on!
They throw the ring, theycatch it, they're happy.
They throw the ring, they catchit, and they're not happy.
How can I understand
such a game?
The bird is on the wing.
The boss is right behind him.
Don'tlet him out of your sight.
Let's go.
Whoops, sorry about that.
I am so clumsy.
I seem to have lost my car keys.
Ah!
Two tickets, thank you, thankyou, thank you, thank you.
Tickets please.
It's all right,
I'm a diplomat.
It still costs a dollar.
Thank you.
My god, Timoshenko,
we are running one
the great spies of all time.
Let us get this to the
thin man immediately!
Good lord!
The ruskis stillhave to give in the $25,000
to get the other
half of the plan.
And we're going to be therewhen they make the pay off.
Jake, it's Eastman.
I need a helicopter with
full surveillance gear.
Helicopter with surveillance?
Yeah, put Kopeck in
the laundry vehicle,
and Mewens in the deliveryvan in front of the embassy.
Delivery van at the embassy.
And no matter what we
do, we can't lose him.
This is mobile 12.
Red herring is rollingin a black Peugeot sedan.
I'm taking up
position on his tail.
Stay
tight, don't lose him.
Yeah, I still
have him in sight.
Break off, mobile three.
Mobile eight, pick him
up on Pennsylvania.
Red herring has
turned into the Naval Museum.
Let's get a blanket
on that museum.
Mobile 12 here.
He's all yours.
Over and out.
Whirly bird, breaking off.
This is three.
Relax, I've got him.
He's right under me.
The Red Herring has stopped overnext to one of the exhibits.
Red Herring has removed
an envelope from his briefcase.
He appears to beattaching it to the struts
of a small helicopter.
A helicopter!
What the--
Jeez,that's a toy helicopter.
It's taking off
with the envelope.
Oh, boy!
Well, whatdo we do about red herring?
No time to think
about what's right.
All the stuff that peoplesay don't interest me.
I'm looking on.
No one's going to tell
me how I've got to be.
Gonna be lookin' for the--
Quick, cover the exit!
Get him!
Get him!
Turn it back!
No!
God!
Come on!
Close those doors!
I can't be movin',
out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I got the door wide open.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
It's escaped!
The helicopter has escaped!
Out of control.
There ain't no way
to hold me down.
Savin' it for next
time, that's news to me.
If you're not looking to getdown, do yourself a favor,
don't get close to me.
Gonna get all that I desirenow 'cause I can't wait.
Better be clearing
out the streets,
better get ready for the heat--
All right.
Yeah!
Amazing!
Come on, let's
get out of here.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I don't know where I'm going.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I can't get moving,
out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I've got the door wide open--
$25,000.
Read the letter
again, Erskine.
I like the part
where they promote
us to full Colonel in the KGB.
I like the part where we getthe order of the red banner.
Yeah, but I like
the bit about the life
insurance plan for spies.
I haven't even
started working yet,
and I got health insuranceand life insurance.
Whoa--
I was young, barely 18.
I could show the whole
world I was your man.
Ran around with the wrongcrowd, tried to be a big--
The position of
the woman on top.
There isn't anything
that automatically
makes this position work.
It is the freedom ofmovement it gives the woman
to seek her own satisfaction,
which in large part
explains why it is soeffective for some women,
especially women of masturbationtype roman numeral three.
You know, I knew it
would come some day.
I just thought I'd be ableto put off the inevitable
for a little while longer.
And this position is oneseen in the earliest Stone Age
drawings as well as on thewall murals at Pompeyii
X-rated wall murals.
You know, you haven't
heard a word I've said.
Not again.
Bring your face over hereand let me have a look.
This time it even itches.
Zits don't itch.
Maybe there's nothing there buta figment of your imagination.
Mm-mm, I can feel when I rub.
It must be just under
the skin, waiting
to pop like a time bomb.
Seriously though, I cameto a big decision last night.
You know, a lot of women fakehaving orgasms, but not me.
When I finally make
love with someone,
I'm going to fake
not having orgasms.
You know, you're a
real number, Denver.
Why are you going to do that?
I read in this
woman's magazine
where it's a real turn on formen to try to make women who
have trouble having
orgasms come off,
so i figure why spoil their fun.
You spend an awful lot
of time on my boobs.
Are you ready to you know what?
Now?
Here?
I think I'll take
another rain check.
Jesus, Erskine, I'm beginningto wonder what I see in you.
Erskine is not my idea ofyour average sexy name.
You don't want to
touch my boobs.
It's not that I don't want to.
It's just that I
can't get my arm to do
what my head tells it to do.
Hey, a likely story.
Oh hey Erskine, have youseen this about the spring
kite-flying contest?
It says here, the
only regulation is you
gotta make the kite yourself.
You can't go out and buy one.
What do you say
we enter it, huh?
We could get Newton todesign us a humongous kite
on his daddy's drawing board.
We could build it just like
one of my model planes.
We could call it
after our rock group,
"The Sins of Commission".
It'd be great publicity,
and we might even
get a gig or two out of it.
What do you say, huh?
Eh, it could be fun.
Ah!
Ow!
What was that for?
I was only trying
to make it rain so we
can cash in your rain check.
Come on, Erk.
Ersk?
Ersk-- Ersk.
And then--
I see it like an
orbiting space station.
It should have a
funny box-shaped dish
antenna at one end.
It should have
tinfoil all over so it
looks like a giant mirror.
Also something sticking
out too, like sunlight
for its batteries.
Da da, da-da da-da!
It's stupendous.
You see what you can dowhen you put your minds to it.
Fasten your seat belts.
Erskine here is coming up withanother one of his brainstorms.
What if--
What if what?
What if we was to sellFig's plan to the Russians?
Yeah, we could say
it was a "top-secret
Star-Wars laser-reflecting"Pentagon satellite.
Well, shucks, it
looks as if it could be.
Well, how would
they know it wasn't?
They swallowed the
Stealth and the B-1.
They'll assume this is real too.
You'd fool me.
I'd pay 25 big ones for it.
And we wouldn't
even have to give
them half now and half later.
Give them the
whole plan at once.
They'd pay up, because
they'd think there's
more where this came from.
Now I know what
I see in you, Ersk.
You're not only a
certified virgin,
you're a certified genius.
It's obviously some
sort of satellite.
But it's so secret, I can't seemto find anyone at the Pentagon
who knows about it.
Keep looking.
Sometimes they swing,
and they're called out.
Sometimes they don't swing,and they're called out.
Sometimes they don't swing,and walk calmly to the base.
Who can understand such a game?
Subject seems to be watchingthe Little League game.
To all units, executecontingency plan Charlie.
God!
If there was a sign thatsaid "keep off the grass",
I didn't see it.
And anyway, I have a
diplomatic immunity.
Cao.
25 big ones.
Oh, my god.
Here, let's read
the letter again.
I love the part
where they promote
us to a General in the KGB.
Imagine us getting theOrder of Lenin at our age.
I still like the bit aboutthe retirement plan for spies.
I got health insurance,
I got life insurance,
I got a retirement plan--
And he hasn't even
started working yet.
You know, we didn't sellhim the plans to some model
airplane this time,
we sold him the plans
to some dumb old kite.
You're talking about
the kite that's going
to win the spring kite contest.
Hey, don't
count your chickens
before they're hatched.
Hey, I mean, the
puppet's right.
We don't even know if we
can get off the ground.
Maybe we should test flyit under field conditions.
Yeah, let's test
fly it right now.
Fine by me.
The Sins of
Commission will fly.
Here we go!
Good
Come on, up, up, yeah!
Yeah!
Yeah!
All right, keep going!
All right, cool.
All right!
I showed this plan to thePentagon chief of Satellite
Research and Development.
I showed it to the
Air Force general
who's in charge of theentire satellite project.
I showed it to theChairman of the Joint Chiefs,
who's in charge of the entireUS military establishment.
None of them had ever
set eyes on it before.
How can the thin man get theplans for one of our satellites
that we don't have?
There's something very
strange about all this.
Maybe we misunderstood.
Maybe this is the plan fora secret Russian satellite.
Or maybe our agent in Moscowhas been turned by the ruskis.
He's just giving us
this information.
Oh gentlemen--
Keep it up, keep it up.
Let off some more slack.
Come on, you got this.
Here, hold it like that.
You can take it off there.
What a bitch!
Hoggy, I think we're in trouble.
Wait a minute, they're kids.
What the hell is this?
I know they're kids.
Let's go.
Um, excuse me,
Hoggy, who are they?
Hey, come here!
You wait for it.
What have you been eating?
You please come here.
Come here!
Come here, you little--
In the movies,
they always make
criminals sit on
uncomfortable chairs
and shine lights in their eyes.
This is not a movie, Erskine.
This is real life.
You and the other
kids have been selling
secrets to the Russians, right?
Wrong.
We never sold theRussians secrets, not one.
What did you do with
the $75,000 you got?
Well, we sort of donatedthe first 50 of it.
We would have donated the restif you hadn't interrupted us.
Donated it to whom?
To Miss Maple,
our music teacher,
so she can have
an eye operation.
Excuse me, may I
go to the bathroom?
How'd it go?
Are they going to
tell our parents?
No talking!
My father will kill
me if hears that we're
spying for the Russians.
I'm going to lose my allowancefor the rest of my life.
Come on, Ersk, tell us
what happened in there.
I told them everything.
Everything?
I said no talking!
Did they know about
the 75 big ones?
Yep.
Did you tell them that we'vebeen promoted to a general
in the Russian army?
Mm-hmm.
My father's going
to kill me when
he hears I'm a Russian General.
He's only a Lieutenant Colonel.
How can he kill you?
You outrank him.
I never really
thought about that.
Maybe we would plead insanity.
These kids have
fooled the thin man
into thinking he
has a master spy
in the American
military establishment.
He's so pleased with theinformation he's getting,
he made the spy a General.
Too, the thin man doesn'tknow who his master spy
is, but he's dying to find out.
That's true, sir.
He'd give his right armto debrief him in person.
He wants to kiss
him on both cheeks,
pin a medal on his breast,and make goddamn sure he
keeps on spying for him.
We can't do that.
They're children.
That's precisely
why we can do it.
In a million years, thethin man would never suspect
that we would use children.
You kids can come on in now.
Oh god, I forgot, I have
a dentist appointment.
My retainer needs tightening.
Maybe it's loosening.
OK, you kids are introuble up to your necks.
You sold information
to the Russians.
You're not going to
make a federal case out
of a model plane, are you?
The fact is that
because of you kids,
the Russians wound up withdetails of the Stealth
jet and the B-1 bomber.
No matter how you slice
it, it's a federal case.
- I really don't feel so good.- Please sit down.
How old are you kids?
13, 14?
You should probably get
out, with good behavior,
by the time you're 40.
40?
Jesus, I'll be menopausal.
- 40 is not that old.
- Are you kidding?
Everything over 25 is down hill.
Maybe the judge
will be lenient
on us because we're kids.
Maybe they'll be lenienton me because I'm a girl.
Maybe he'd be lenient
on me because I'm black.
Now what the
judge is going to go
easy on a Russian General, huh?
I want my mom.
I want my lawyer.
On the other
hand, a judge might
just go easy on
kids who cooperated
with their government.
And if they cooperated
hard enough,
the matter might not evenget as far as a judge.
Oh, no.
Here we go again.
If these kids that
you're talking about
cooperate hard
enough, could they
do what they want with
the last 25 big ones
they got from the Russians?
I don't see anybody
objecting to that.
And if these kids
you're talking about
cooperate hard
enough, is it possible
they can get another 25big ones for their trouble?
You're pushing
your luck, Erskine.
We might see our way clearto giving you 10 big ones.
No, 25.
20, and that's my final offer.
You could have told.
All right, 25 big
ones for your services.
So what is it we got to do?
I want you tocontact the Russians again.
You're going to tell
them that you're
ready to meet the thin man.
I have a hunch he'll comeover to debrief you himself.
I get it.
As soon as--
If only
life were that simple.
The thin man is cagey.
He'll meet you in
Cuba or on a ship.
And if my plan works, you kidswill be the first Americans
to get a look at his face.
When you get back,
I'll sit you all down
with our composite artist,you'll describe the thin man,
and he'll draw him.
The next time he
enters this country,
we'll know what he looks
like, and grab him.
Why bother?
I'll just interview him for you.
Interview him?
Yeah, with
my video camera.
You have
a video camera?
It's in my knapsack.
Interviewing people is my hobby.
The
thin man on video--
come on, he'll never
sit still for that.
Jesus, he
really showed up.
Oh, god, are you sure wehave to go through with this?
Well, we got to.
They'll put us in jail
and throw away the key.
We'll be 40 by
the time we get out.
They are children.
What are thesechildren doing here?
I don't know.
Maybe they're having a picnic.
They can spoil the
whole operation.
They can scare the contact.
Go for it, Denver.
Go!
Go away!
Go away!
Go!
Go away!
Go away!
Zaluska.
That's the password.
They are the contact?
Zaluska!
Children,
come with us for a ride.
Haven't I
seen these kids before?
Oh, no, we're really
going to do this, huh?
Climb
aboard little boy.
Thanks.
Enjoying
your split bananas?
You mean banana splits.
I thought they were
called split bananas.
He's right.
They are called split bananas.
Did I say banana splits?
What a jerk I am.
I meant split bananas.
They're absolutely humongous.
Which one of you kids gotall those plans you sold us?
We all did.
Oscar here's father works forthe Joint Chiefs of Staff.
And Erskine's father
is a congressman.
And my stepfather is the
secretary of something
or other in the
president's cabinet.
And your father really
works with Joint Chiefs?
Uh, yeah.
He's in charge of developingan anti-tank guided missile
destroyer.
No, wait a minute.
Was an anti-destroyer
guided missile tank.
Anyhow, he brings the planshome at night in his briefcase,
and so that's how I--
That's how come he
was able to get them.
Yeah.
I see.
And which one of you
got the bright idea
of doing business with us?
That's me.
I always admired
Russia, so I thought why
not give these plans to them.
What is it exactly
you admire Russia for?
Its size.
When you look at a worldmap, it looks kind of big.
I see.
I see.
Timoshenko!
What about the camera?
What the hell
are we doing, man?
I mean--
Where did they go?
They obviously did
it for the money.
I wouldn't trust anyAmerican who says that he
prefers our system to theirs.
Just a stupid bad
joke, that's all.
They could be a
goldmine of information.
I don't think so.
What if--
Americans will neversuspect us using children.
- I'm going to do it.
- Go for it.
Never.
That's brilliant.
It's like a child's play.
Let's say you have
something for us,
so you mailed us a picturepostcard to the address
that I gave you.
So let's say if you
sign it, let's assume,
"love, Johnathan", we know thatyou planted a package for us
behind the radiator
in the men's room
on the ground floor of
the treasury building.
It is child's play, hm?
Uh, can I ask you a question.
Sure.
Could you tell mea little bit about yourself?
I'm afraid it's not possible.
Couldn't you even
tell me where you live?
That's
classified information.
Are you married?
That
is also classified.
What about children?
Children?
Yeah, do
you have any kids?
Yes, I do.
What's their names?
How old are they?
Demitri is 21.
My daughter's name
is Yekaterina.
She's what you Americans
call "sweet 16".
What do they do?
Demitri is studyingpolitics at the University.
Yekaterina wants to
manage a boutique store.
She likes fancy clothes,
and she likes money.
All they Demitri i is
to buy Levi's blue jeans
and on the black market,
and to get some tape,
something called
"Rastaman Vibrations."
Every time I talk
to them, they have
those Walkman
plugs in their ears
with a teeny noise coming out.
They say they listen
to music, but it
doesn't sound like music to me.
It sounds like
noise, regular noise.
And it frightens me.
And there is nothing
I can do about it.
I'm going to be sick.
I don't think split
bananas agree with me.
Hello, Hoggy, piano.
That's better, Erskine.
Good, Denver, good.
That happens to be the bestchamber music I've ever seen.
I don't mean to be nosy,but what's with the Band-Aid?
Oh, that?
I cut myself shaving.
Uh-uh, uh-uh.
All right, I got my first zit.
Take a look.
Hey, congratulations.
Thanks.
Welcome to the
world of zits, Ersk.
How do you feel?
Like maybe I'll
survive after all.
I think you'll survive, too.
I'm going through changes.
I'm losing myself to you.
I can't believe it
happened all so fast.
When I see myself in your eyes,I start to lose control again.
I try to take it slow,
but I can't pretend.
Will you be mine, my firsttrue love, I'm already fallin.
Maybe we'll find--
The trouble
with me is I look weird.
I think you'regreat looking for a girl.
You don't
have to say that.
I got eyes.
I mean it, Denver.
You're terrific.
Do you
honestly think so?
Anyone who says you lookweird is off their rocker.
You don't think I'm
sort of flat chested?
Not at all.
Not for your age.
I always thought you didn'twant to, you know, touch me,
because you thought therewas nothing there to touch.
That wasn't it at all.
I swear, Denver, I'll prove it.
If the offer still holds.
Go for it, Ersk.
Wow.
It's the first time
I ever actually
touched a living girl's--
Breast.
Breast.
How was it?
It was humongous.
Was it really humongous?
Really, humongous.
I'll tell you a
dark secret, Ersk.
It was the first
time for me too.
What about Morgan in
the movies and all that?
I made that up to impress you.
I'm glad my first time
was your first time.
Likewise.
Who knows, maybe we'll sharesome other firsts someday.
So how do you feel, Denver?
How do I feel?
As high as a kite.
Hey, guys!
Come on, wait up!
Come on!
Go for it.
Go for it!
All right.
You know something, Ersk?
I like you a lot.
I may even love you a little.
Likewise.
All around, you changed my life.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm fallin' love.
All along I was sure we wouldbe the same as the rest.
I was wrong 'cause the
feeling shot through me
and I confess the
things you do to make
me say your name like a prayer.
Now I believe it baby that youspoke for my love when I can't.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you've got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm fallin' in love.
There ain't no way
to hold me down.
Saving it for next time
'cause that's history.
If you're not looking to getdown, do yourself a favor,
don't get close to me.
Gonna get all that I desire,now because I can't wait.
better be clearing
out the streets,
better be ready for the heat.
putting my hand right nearthe fire, all that I can take.
No way to tell where I mightgo, I can be dangerous you know.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I don't know where I'm going.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I keep on movin'.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I got the door wide open.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
Woo!
Out of control!
Out of control!
No one can make
me change for you.
Stand back and look at
what you've got to do.
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Feelin' down, don't you give up.
Go for it!
Keep on trying and don't stop!
Go for it!
Come and take your best shot.
Go for it!
Go for it!
You're feelin' red hot.
Go for it!
I live here in Washington, DC.
My dad's a congressman.
My hobby is interviewing people.
I can get anyone to talk.
My friends and I play
in a string quintet.
But our dream is to be a band.
Hi, my name's
Hoggy Livingstone.
I'm 13 and three quartersgoing on 13 and five sixths.
I look young, but I talk old.
I live in Georgetown with mymother and her new husband
and her cat, which
I'm allergic to,
and his two kids, which
I'm also allergic to.
My name is Oscar Opily.
I've just entered
the terrible teens.
I'm an army brat.
My father works with
for the Joint Chiefs
here in Washington.
He's in charge of developingan anti-tank-guided missile
destroyer with an anti-destroyerguided missile tank.
So your
parents are divorced?
Well, isn't everyone's?
I mean, let's face
facts, Erskine.
Divorce is one of America'sgreat institutions.
Instead of two parents
who fight all the time,
you wind up with four whocompete for your affection.
Out of the mouth of babes.
My name is Newton Robinson.
My parents call me
Newton as in fig newton.
My friends call me Fig,
also as in fig newton.
I'm 13 years old.
My father's an architect.
When I grow up, I
want to be like him.
I want to be an
architect, a Democrat,
and make six figures,
whatever that means.
The fact of the matter is,I don't have an actual name.
Hoggy, here, who more
or less invented me,
says I'm your typical parent.
In any given situation,
I spout the cliches
that parents usually rely onto get their point across.
My first name is Denver, asin the capitol of Colorado.
My last name is Deck, as
in "all hands on deck".
In case you're interested, Iwas named Denver because that's
where I was conceived.
My father was campaigningthere, and he took my mom
along on his expense account.
My name is Zelda Maple.
My friends call me Zelda.
My students call me Miss Maple.
In theory, I am a part-timemusic teacher in this school,
but what I really do is organizethe sounds that come out
of your instruments
so that it offends
the least number of people.
My mother's had threehusbands, at different times,
naturally.
Polyandry is when they overlap,you have them all at once.
It's also known as group sex.
Your mother
had three husbands?
She's on her third one now.
He's the Secretary
of something or other
in the president's cabinet.
Do you have any otherhobbies besides the cello?
I build and flyremote-control model planes.
Who are you doing this
interview for, Erskine?
Erskine, what's this for?
Who are you doing the
interview for, Erskine?
What's the interview for?
Hey, Erskine, do
you mind telling me
what this interview is for?
It's me, the famous Erskine.
And as for who I'm doing
these interviews for,
I'm doing it for the fun of it.
After all these years,you're still flat, Denver.
Would it be too much to askyou to give me a middle A?
You're getting warmer.
Warmer.
Stop.
And one, two, three, four.
Well, I have an
announcement to make.
It wasn't nearly as bad as Ithought it was going to be.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Feeling so lonely, nobody'sthere to understand.
Darkness around you,want someone to hold you.
You can't hide your eyes,
drop that bold disguise.
Then you'll finally see,
what we're here for.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Come on, take your
best shot, go for it.
I'm feeling red hot, go for it.
When you're getting
down, don't you give up.
Go for it.
Keep on trying and don't stop.
Go for it.
Oh god, I think this
is it, my first zit.
Do you see it?
You want my
professional opinion?
There's absolutely
nothing there.
Anyway, everyone knows
you can't have zits
unless you have pubic hair.
What makes you think
I don't have pubic hair?
I just assumed.
Well, you just assumed wrong.
Well, don't get uptight.
We need to hear it.
I've had my punctuation already.
Punctuation?
My period, dumb-dumb.
I ovulate.
So are you guys into
masturbation yet?
You know, you ask a lot
of questions for a girl.
Look it, if we're
going to be a quintet,
not to mention a
rock group, we've
got to be open with each other.
Relationships should
be based upon honesty.
Anyway, it's no federal
crime not to masturbate.
Well, I masturbate.
Oh yeah, me too, me--
too?
Well, I, uh, guess I do too.
Likewise.
Likewise what?
I--
Say it.
I masturbate.
Masturbation makes you deaf.
What?
I said masturbation
makes you deaf.
What did you say?
You look pretty grim.
Because of
Monday-morning blues.
Oh.
I wish school would
start on Tuesday.
Yeah, it'd end on Thursday.
Yeah, which would leave
us a four-day weekend.
Hoggy, Fig, wait up!
Hey, how are you guys doing?
well, she heard--
What's going on here?
Look, there's Oscar.
What's everyone
whispering about?
Haven't you heard?
Haven't we heard what?
Miss Maple got
mugged last night.
Oh, my god, what she hurt?
Was she ever.
The mugger threw some
kind of acid in her face
and nearly blinded her.
She's going to
need an operation.
What a bitch.
Where is she?
She's at the
Memorial Hospital.
How you
doing, Miss Maple?
Who's that?
It's me, Newton Robinson.
Newton?
Oh, Newton, I'm doing
just fine, I suppose,
all things considered.
It must be hard notbeing able to see and all.
Denver-- yes, it's
hard, but I just
thank the good lord they didn'tdo anything to my hearing.
Bye, Miss Maple.
How could anybody
mug Miss Maple?
We absolutely have todo something to help her.
She's a part-time teacher.
She has no health insurance.
We're talking about taking
up a collection for her.
The operation costs $100,000.
How are we going to get ourhands on that kind of bread.
Bread doesn't grow
on trees, you know?
Money neither.
Poor Miss Maple.
How can we help her?
Yeah what a bitch.
Watch out, everybody,
I think he's getting
another one of his brainstorms.
23, 24, 25,
26, 27 28, 28.50, 29.
One of the adults
must have passed
himself off as a student.
Well, that leaves
only $99,971 to go.
There's got to be a wayfor us to make big bucks.
What about computer crime?
People make millions that way.
I hate computers.
I don't hate computers.
I just don't understand
how they work.
I mean, how can you
do addition if you
don't have fingers to count on?
What if we was to writea book for kids about sex.
We could talk about femaleejaculation, multiple orgasms,
the g-spot, that sort of thing.
Everything you wanted
to know but the parents
wouldn't tell you.
What's a multiple organism?
No, it's orgasm,
Oscar, not organism.
It's what women
have that men can't.
No, no, a book
would take too long.
We'd have to research
it, then we'd
have to write it, wait forthe publisher to publish it.
Yeah, but I mean, theresearch part could be fun.
You got a dirty mind, Hoggy.
All this talk about sex isgoing to give me heart failure.
Then you'll be sorry.
What we need is somethingwe can sell to someone.
I got it.
All we got to do
to get some money--
sell secrets.
Secrets, what secrets?
Like the guys in movies.
They secrets to the Russians.
I still think sexresearch would be more fun.
We make up secrets.
Since what we'll be
selling is secret,
they can never know if
it's made up or not.
Erskine may be
on to something.
How would we contact themso they wouldn't know they
were dealing with adolescents?
That's easy.
We'd use dead-letter drops.
But-- I don't get it.
A dead-letter drop is
a secret hiding place,
like behind a radiator in apublic building, or in a hole
in a tree in the park.
You leave the letter there,you tell them you've left it.
They come, pick it up,leave money in its place.
They never see us,
we never see them.
Then we secretly donate
the money to Miss Maples
so she can get
her eyesight back.
I think it's humongous,being spies for the Russians.
Let's put it to a vote.
All those in favor,
raise their hands.
It's settled then.
The sins of commission
have become spies.
All right, there's our dude.
The thing to do is splitup so he doesn't notice us.
All right, Hoggy,
you and Oscar follow
him from across the street.
Denver and I and Newtonwill follow him from behind.
All right, whatever
you do, act natural.
He's a closet American.
Come on.
Come on!
I don't get it.
What do you think he's doing?
There's only one
way to find out.
Nah, you wouldn't
have the guts.
I dare you.
Well, wait a minute.
What are you going to do ifhe doesn't speak English?
What a bitch.
Go ahead.
My name is
Vladimir Timoshenko.
I am 37 years of age.
And I am a first secretaryin a Soviet Embassy
here in Washington.
Here's my question.
What are you doing in the park?
Why aren't you at the embassydoing whatever secretaries do?
I suppose there is noharm in answering you that.
After all, you're
just a small child.
I am in charge of analyzingthe American public opinion.
And every once in a while,I get into my blue jeans
and chew gum, listen to
Bette Midler, and make
believe that I am
an American so I
can understand what goes onin those capitalist heads
of yours.
And you, sonny boy, who are youdoing this interview for, heh?
Get a hold of this.
It's a photo of
the Sergeant York
ground-to-air missile system.
Uh-uh uh-uh.
Here's a new Isrealiautomatic rapid-fire rifle
that's replacing the
Uzi submachine gun.
Would you leave aphotograph of the control
panel of a Minuteman
Intercontinental
Ballistic Missile silo?
I've got the best yet.
A cross-section diagram
of the new Abrams
main-line battle tank.
No.
What do you
have against the Abrams
main-line battle tank?
I don't have anything againstAbrams main-line battle tank.
It's just that if we can
waltz right into a store
and buy a picture
of it, you can bet
the Russians have alsowaltzed right into a store
and bought a picture of it.
Erskine's right.
I never thought of that.
Well, then where are wegoing to get our secrets from?
What we need is some
place with pictures
of military equipmentthat the Russians wouldn't
even think of looking for.
Oh, look at that.
What about this?
Denver, Mohawk 4B-150?
Denver, look.
Stealth F-19 Fighter.
I think we got us our secret.
And that completesthe tail section.
Where'd you learn todo that kind of stuff, Fig?
I told you when
you interviewed me.
I want to be like my father.
I picked it up watching him.
What is it
with you and zits?
You'd think it was
leprosy or something.
Zits worse than leprosy.
It's like having anadvertisement over your head
that says "adolescent".
Nobody takes a kid
with zits seriously.
You got to learn to
take it in your stride.
Easy for you to say.
You don't even have any zits.
You're doing it again.
Doing what again?
You're staring at my boobs.
You're almost as obsessed withthem as you are with zits.
You're accusing me of
staring at your boobs?
It's nothing to be ashamed of.
It's the kind of thingthat can happen to anyone.
Hey, guys, what do you think?
What I think is the
Russians will pay plenty
to get their hands on this.
It's humongous, Newton.
How much do you think
we can ask for it?
I'm going
to be real careful.
You see, if we ask
for too little,
they might be suspiciousthat the plans aren't real.
But if we ask for too much, theymight not be able to afford it.
Hey, what in the heck
did you do that for?
Well, we give them half, andwe tell them we'll give them
the other half for 25 big ones.
Then we sit back and waitand see what they give us.
25 big ones.
Did anybody ever tellyou you're very original?
For a boy.
He's reading
the note again.
He's thinking about it.
He's getting up.
He's having second thoughts.
Oh wait, he's hesitating.
He's starting for the statue.
He's walking towards the statue.
He swallowed the bait!
Yes!
Pervert!
25 big ones.
That is not peanuts.
Yes, but if this is
genuine, the thin man
will be very pleased.
I want his identity.
I want his name, his
age, his religion,
his connections, his
habits, his weaknesses,
his past, his present.
Along with the
payment, they have
to include a personal
note complimenting him
on the high quality
of his information.
We must play this new
spy with great skill.
They can do this or
I can do it myself.
Good lord.
The identity of
the thin man is one
of the most closely-guardedsecrets in the Soviet
military establishment.
But we do know his
name is Victor, sir.
We don't know his age.
We don't know what
he really looks like.
All we know for
sure is that he is
the mastermind behind
Soviet espionage
activity in North America.
Now, do we really
know that he's thin?
No, at least not
from that picture.
Well, maybe he stoppedjogging around the Kremlin.
So we're looking for aperhaps formerly thin man
named Victor
something, who might
have jogged around the Kremlin.
Jesus-- what other gems
do you have for me?
Our source in Moscow, theman who took that photograph is
fairly certain that the thin mancomes to America to personally
de-brief his key agents.
Chances are, sir,
he's passing himself off
as a businessman or
a tourist, someone
who could come over for a fewdays and not arouse suspicion.
Good lord.
Gentlemen, our worstnightmares are coming true.
The thin man has amaster spy in Washington.
He's already given him theplans for the Stealth jet,
a plane so secret we don'teven publicly admit it exists.
Well, the way I see
it is if this spy got
his hands on the Stealth,God knows what other secrets
he'll give away.
What a bitch.
I'll get my people to compilea list of everyone who had
access to the Stealth plant.
What good will that do?
The names will run
into the hundreds.
I don't care if they
run into the thousands.
Put this onto the front burner.
I want every Russian who stickshis nose out of that embassy
followed day and night.
Oh, what I wouldn't give
for one good snapshot
of the thin man's face.
We've been checking outthe dead letter drop for a week
now.
If there's nothing
there, it must
mean they didn't fall for it.
I know.
Denver?
Denver?
Denver?
What do you say, Denver?
What do you say, Morgan?
What about us taking
a flick Saturday?
Thanks, but I've
seen it already.
How do you know if you'veseen it if I didn't see
what flick I want to go see?
Whenever flick you want togo see, I've seen it already.
Anyway, I'm going to themovies with Erskine here.
What ya doin, Denver,
robbing the cradle?
You need someone witha little more experience.
Don't you read the
newspapers, dummy?
The only ones really
safe to fool around with
are the certified virgins.
Yeah?
He looks like a
certified virgin.
Hey, come on guys, here we go.
What did you have to
go and say that for?
There's nothing wrong
with being a virgin.
It's very wonderful peoplehappen to be virgins.
Me, for example.
Did you catch those zits?
I hope they're not contagious.
Morgan's a pathetic nerd.
I already been to the
movies with him twice.
All he wants to
do is feel me up.
Feel you up as in feel you up?
He doesn't
believe in foreplay.
What's foreplay?
When you talk
before you touch.
I'm not ready to be felt up yet.
Erskine, I gotta
ask you something,
and I want a straight answer.
No bullshit, promise?
Yeah, promise.
How do you see
our relationship?
Is that what we have?
I mean it, Erskine.
Puberty is a difficult
period for a girl.
She has a right to
know what to expect,
and how soon she can expect it.
All right, we belong
to the same rock group
and the same quintet
and the same spy ring.
Erskine, I'm not talking aboutour professional relationship.
I'm talking about our
personal relationship.
Our personalrelationship is humongous.
Humongous?
You're doing it again, Erskine.
Doing what?
You're zeroing in
on my boobs again.
I am, aren't I?
Whenever you're
ready, I'm ready.
Wait a minute, I thought youweren't ready for that kind
of thing yet.
When Morgan paws me atthe movies it's one thing.
When a friend puts his
hand on your heart,
well, that's different.
I think I'll
take a rain check.
Look at those dudes, will ya?
What a bonehead I am.
I should have thought of that.
They put something in thedead letter drop, all right.
But they're watching to seewho's going to pick it up.
And our dudes are watchingtheir dudes watching.
I think we should
move a little closer.
Cinderella six,
any sign of the pick up yet?
Cinderella nine, no, joy.
Mr. Balloon man,can I have a balloon, please?
Get
rid of those damn kids.
Geesh,even the station chief's here.
Which one?
The chauffeur.
Cinderellafour, get a shot of him,
please.
All Cinderellas,
stay on your toes.
Erskine, how are we going toget it without them seeing us?
--three four.
Can't deny I was sure I wouldknow baby when it was my time.
They would jump, I would
shake my head no, baby.
Then you came out of nowhere,you've got me into your sights.
We just came in right there,oh how you changed my life.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you've got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm falling in love.
All along I was sure theywould be the same as the rest--
Timoshenko!
I was wrong 'cause a feelingshot through me and I confess,
the things you do to make mesay your name like a prayer--
You ought to be ashamed
of yourself, young man.
--cause you spoke and I look,and right there, bullseye,
you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you got
my heart, bullseye--
It's not my day.
Maybe it is my day after all.
You mean our day, comrade.
24,200--
29--
- 24,300--
30--
24,400, 24,500, 24,600--
30.50--
- 24,700--
- 31--
24,800--
31.25--
24,900--
31.26, 31.27--
25,000
31 dollars and 27 cents.
Dollars?
Dollars.
Since when have we
made playing classical?
I realize that.
A little bit of all right!
We got it.
We did it!
25 big ones.
Who would have believed it?
There's more where this came
from.
Yeah!
Woo!
All right!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Living it up!
Comrade.
Russians always call people thatthey're tight with "Comrade".
It mean something
like "soul brother."
No one never called
me "comrade" before.
No one's ever calledme "soul brother" before.
Read the part where they
promote us to Lieutenant
Colonel in the KGB.
Read the part about us gettingthe order of the red star.
I like the bit
about the health
insurance plan for spies.
Jeez, I haven't even
started working yet,
and I got health insurance.
We've got to plan ournext step very carefully.
The thin man,
he'll be furious.
How could we know some kidswould play decadent rock music?
It's decadent
but it's beautiful.
Let us hope that
this new spy of ours
will keep in touch
with us again, hmm?
Timoshenko!
Be so kind to pass me a straw.
We thought we
were on to something
when the Russians
staked out the park,
but some kids staged an
impromptu rock concert.
Whoever it was the Russianswere waiting for never showed.
The spy was scared
off with the rock music.
Well, I would be too.
If there's somethinghumorous in this situation,
I would appreciate it if
you'd let me in on it.
There's a Russian spy
out there somewhere.
You've got to nail him!
Hey Erskine, how many timesdo you plan to interview me?
Until you
get to the real you.
All right, what's the
single thing you're most
afraid of in the whole world?
That I'll end up with a chestas flat as an ironing board.
My mom says not to worry, thatshe was a late bloomer too,
but I'm not taking any chances.
I give them all the
encouragement I can.
What do you mean?
Well, every morning I sit-infront of the mirror for five
minutes and I talk to them.
Grow, titties, grow!
Grow titties, grow!
Last time
I interviewed you,
you said your mother wasworking on her third husband.
What effect does
this have on you?
None whatsoever.
If you want to know the truth,my parents fought so much,
it was a relief
when they separated.
They're perfectly
happy living apart.
They get along
better now than they
did when they were married.
Just the other
day, when my father
came to take me to lunch, hewas very friendly with my mom.
And when he left, he--
And when he left?
When he left, he shook handswith her, if you must know.
Well, what'swrong with shaking hands?
Don't you see?
He didn't kiss her.
It means it's all
over between them!
Holy shit!
I don't believe this!
Ah!
Die!
Die!
Die!
Hey!
What's that?
What's that?
I think we
got another secret.
Hold on!
They throw the ring, theycatch it, they're happy.
They throw the ring, they catchit, and they're not happy.
How can I understand
such a game?
The bird is on the wing.
The boss is right behind him.
Don'tlet him out of your sight.
Let's go.
Whoops, sorry about that.
I am so clumsy.
I seem to have lost my car keys.
Ah!
Two tickets, thank you, thankyou, thank you, thank you.
Tickets please.
It's all right,
I'm a diplomat.
It still costs a dollar.
Thank you.
My god, Timoshenko,
we are running one
the great spies of all time.
Let us get this to the
thin man immediately!
Good lord!
The ruskis stillhave to give in the $25,000
to get the other
half of the plan.
And we're going to be therewhen they make the pay off.
Jake, it's Eastman.
I need a helicopter with
full surveillance gear.
Helicopter with surveillance?
Yeah, put Kopeck in
the laundry vehicle,
and Mewens in the deliveryvan in front of the embassy.
Delivery van at the embassy.
And no matter what we
do, we can't lose him.
This is mobile 12.
Red herring is rollingin a black Peugeot sedan.
I'm taking up
position on his tail.
Stay
tight, don't lose him.
Yeah, I still
have him in sight.
Break off, mobile three.
Mobile eight, pick him
up on Pennsylvania.
Red herring has
turned into the Naval Museum.
Let's get a blanket
on that museum.
Mobile 12 here.
He's all yours.
Over and out.
Whirly bird, breaking off.
This is three.
Relax, I've got him.
He's right under me.
The Red Herring has stopped overnext to one of the exhibits.
Red Herring has removed
an envelope from his briefcase.
He appears to beattaching it to the struts
of a small helicopter.
A helicopter!
What the--
Jeez,that's a toy helicopter.
It's taking off
with the envelope.
Oh, boy!
Well, whatdo we do about red herring?
No time to think
about what's right.
All the stuff that peoplesay don't interest me.
I'm looking on.
No one's going to tell
me how I've got to be.
Gonna be lookin' for the--
Quick, cover the exit!
Get him!
Get him!
Turn it back!
No!
God!
Come on!
Close those doors!
I can't be movin',
out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I got the door wide open.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
It's escaped!
The helicopter has escaped!
Out of control.
There ain't no way
to hold me down.
Savin' it for next
time, that's news to me.
If you're not looking to getdown, do yourself a favor,
don't get close to me.
Gonna get all that I desirenow 'cause I can't wait.
Better be clearing
out the streets,
better get ready for the heat--
All right.
Yeah!
Amazing!
Come on, let's
get out of here.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I don't know where I'm going.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I can't get moving,
out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I've got the door wide open--
$25,000.
Read the letter
again, Erskine.
I like the part
where they promote
us to full Colonel in the KGB.
I like the part where we getthe order of the red banner.
Yeah, but I like
the bit about the life
insurance plan for spies.
I haven't even
started working yet,
and I got health insuranceand life insurance.
Whoa--
I was young, barely 18.
I could show the whole
world I was your man.
Ran around with the wrongcrowd, tried to be a big--
The position of
the woman on top.
There isn't anything
that automatically
makes this position work.
It is the freedom ofmovement it gives the woman
to seek her own satisfaction,
which in large part
explains why it is soeffective for some women,
especially women of masturbationtype roman numeral three.
You know, I knew it
would come some day.
I just thought I'd be ableto put off the inevitable
for a little while longer.
And this position is oneseen in the earliest Stone Age
drawings as well as on thewall murals at Pompeyii
X-rated wall murals.
You know, you haven't
heard a word I've said.
Not again.
Bring your face over hereand let me have a look.
This time it even itches.
Zits don't itch.
Maybe there's nothing there buta figment of your imagination.
Mm-mm, I can feel when I rub.
It must be just under
the skin, waiting
to pop like a time bomb.
Seriously though, I cameto a big decision last night.
You know, a lot of women fakehaving orgasms, but not me.
When I finally make
love with someone,
I'm going to fake
not having orgasms.
You know, you're a
real number, Denver.
Why are you going to do that?
I read in this
woman's magazine
where it's a real turn on formen to try to make women who
have trouble having
orgasms come off,
so i figure why spoil their fun.
You spend an awful lot
of time on my boobs.
Are you ready to you know what?
Now?
Here?
I think I'll take
another rain check.
Jesus, Erskine, I'm beginningto wonder what I see in you.
Erskine is not my idea ofyour average sexy name.
You don't want to
touch my boobs.
It's not that I don't want to.
It's just that I
can't get my arm to do
what my head tells it to do.
Hey, a likely story.
Oh hey Erskine, have youseen this about the spring
kite-flying contest?
It says here, the
only regulation is you
gotta make the kite yourself.
You can't go out and buy one.
What do you say
we enter it, huh?
We could get Newton todesign us a humongous kite
on his daddy's drawing board.
We could build it just like
one of my model planes.
We could call it
after our rock group,
"The Sins of Commission".
It'd be great publicity,
and we might even
get a gig or two out of it.
What do you say, huh?
Eh, it could be fun.
Ah!
Ow!
What was that for?
I was only trying
to make it rain so we
can cash in your rain check.
Come on, Erk.
Ersk?
Ersk-- Ersk.
And then--
I see it like an
orbiting space station.
It should have a
funny box-shaped dish
antenna at one end.
It should have
tinfoil all over so it
looks like a giant mirror.
Also something sticking
out too, like sunlight
for its batteries.
Da da, da-da da-da!
It's stupendous.
You see what you can dowhen you put your minds to it.
Fasten your seat belts.
Erskine here is coming up withanother one of his brainstorms.
What if--
What if what?
What if we was to sellFig's plan to the Russians?
Yeah, we could say
it was a "top-secret
Star-Wars laser-reflecting"Pentagon satellite.
Well, shucks, it
looks as if it could be.
Well, how would
they know it wasn't?
They swallowed the
Stealth and the B-1.
They'll assume this is real too.
You'd fool me.
I'd pay 25 big ones for it.
And we wouldn't
even have to give
them half now and half later.
Give them the
whole plan at once.
They'd pay up, because
they'd think there's
more where this came from.
Now I know what
I see in you, Ersk.
You're not only a
certified virgin,
you're a certified genius.
It's obviously some
sort of satellite.
But it's so secret, I can't seemto find anyone at the Pentagon
who knows about it.
Keep looking.
Sometimes they swing,
and they're called out.
Sometimes they don't swing,and they're called out.
Sometimes they don't swing,and walk calmly to the base.
Who can understand such a game?
Subject seems to be watchingthe Little League game.
To all units, executecontingency plan Charlie.
God!
If there was a sign thatsaid "keep off the grass",
I didn't see it.
And anyway, I have a
diplomatic immunity.
Cao.
25 big ones.
Oh, my god.
Here, let's read
the letter again.
I love the part
where they promote
us to a General in the KGB.
Imagine us getting theOrder of Lenin at our age.
I still like the bit aboutthe retirement plan for spies.
I got health insurance,
I got life insurance,
I got a retirement plan--
And he hasn't even
started working yet.
You know, we didn't sellhim the plans to some model
airplane this time,
we sold him the plans
to some dumb old kite.
You're talking about
the kite that's going
to win the spring kite contest.
Hey, don't
count your chickens
before they're hatched.
Hey, I mean, the
puppet's right.
We don't even know if we
can get off the ground.
Maybe we should test flyit under field conditions.
Yeah, let's test
fly it right now.
Fine by me.
The Sins of
Commission will fly.
Here we go!
Good
Come on, up, up, yeah!
Yeah!
Yeah!
All right, keep going!
All right, cool.
All right!
I showed this plan to thePentagon chief of Satellite
Research and Development.
I showed it to the
Air Force general
who's in charge of theentire satellite project.
I showed it to theChairman of the Joint Chiefs,
who's in charge of the entireUS military establishment.
None of them had ever
set eyes on it before.
How can the thin man get theplans for one of our satellites
that we don't have?
There's something very
strange about all this.
Maybe we misunderstood.
Maybe this is the plan fora secret Russian satellite.
Or maybe our agent in Moscowhas been turned by the ruskis.
He's just giving us
this information.
Oh gentlemen--
Keep it up, keep it up.
Let off some more slack.
Come on, you got this.
Here, hold it like that.
You can take it off there.
What a bitch!
Hoggy, I think we're in trouble.
Wait a minute, they're kids.
What the hell is this?
I know they're kids.
Let's go.
Um, excuse me,
Hoggy, who are they?
Hey, come here!
You wait for it.
What have you been eating?
You please come here.
Come here!
Come here, you little--
In the movies,
they always make
criminals sit on
uncomfortable chairs
and shine lights in their eyes.
This is not a movie, Erskine.
This is real life.
You and the other
kids have been selling
secrets to the Russians, right?
Wrong.
We never sold theRussians secrets, not one.
What did you do with
the $75,000 you got?
Well, we sort of donatedthe first 50 of it.
We would have donated the restif you hadn't interrupted us.
Donated it to whom?
To Miss Maple,
our music teacher,
so she can have
an eye operation.
Excuse me, may I
go to the bathroom?
How'd it go?
Are they going to
tell our parents?
No talking!
My father will kill
me if hears that we're
spying for the Russians.
I'm going to lose my allowancefor the rest of my life.
Come on, Ersk, tell us
what happened in there.
I told them everything.
Everything?
I said no talking!
Did they know about
the 75 big ones?
Yep.
Did you tell them that we'vebeen promoted to a general
in the Russian army?
Mm-hmm.
My father's going
to kill me when
he hears I'm a Russian General.
He's only a Lieutenant Colonel.
How can he kill you?
You outrank him.
I never really
thought about that.
Maybe we would plead insanity.
These kids have
fooled the thin man
into thinking he
has a master spy
in the American
military establishment.
He's so pleased with theinformation he's getting,
he made the spy a General.
Too, the thin man doesn'tknow who his master spy
is, but he's dying to find out.
That's true, sir.
He'd give his right armto debrief him in person.
He wants to kiss
him on both cheeks,
pin a medal on his breast,and make goddamn sure he
keeps on spying for him.
We can't do that.
They're children.
That's precisely
why we can do it.
In a million years, thethin man would never suspect
that we would use children.
You kids can come on in now.
Oh god, I forgot, I have
a dentist appointment.
My retainer needs tightening.
Maybe it's loosening.
OK, you kids are introuble up to your necks.
You sold information
to the Russians.
You're not going to
make a federal case out
of a model plane, are you?
The fact is that
because of you kids,
the Russians wound up withdetails of the Stealth
jet and the B-1 bomber.
No matter how you slice
it, it's a federal case.
- I really don't feel so good.- Please sit down.
How old are you kids?
13, 14?
You should probably get
out, with good behavior,
by the time you're 40.
40?
Jesus, I'll be menopausal.
- 40 is not that old.
- Are you kidding?
Everything over 25 is down hill.
Maybe the judge
will be lenient
on us because we're kids.
Maybe they'll be lenienton me because I'm a girl.
Maybe he'd be lenient
on me because I'm black.
Now what the
judge is going to go
easy on a Russian General, huh?
I want my mom.
I want my lawyer.
On the other
hand, a judge might
just go easy on
kids who cooperated
with their government.
And if they cooperated
hard enough,
the matter might not evenget as far as a judge.
Oh, no.
Here we go again.
If these kids that
you're talking about
cooperate hard
enough, could they
do what they want with
the last 25 big ones
they got from the Russians?
I don't see anybody
objecting to that.
And if these kids
you're talking about
cooperate hard
enough, is it possible
they can get another 25big ones for their trouble?
You're pushing
your luck, Erskine.
We might see our way clearto giving you 10 big ones.
No, 25.
20, and that's my final offer.
You could have told.
All right, 25 big
ones for your services.
So what is it we got to do?
I want you tocontact the Russians again.
You're going to tell
them that you're
ready to meet the thin man.
I have a hunch he'll comeover to debrief you himself.
I get it.
As soon as--
If only
life were that simple.
The thin man is cagey.
He'll meet you in
Cuba or on a ship.
And if my plan works, you kidswill be the first Americans
to get a look at his face.
When you get back,
I'll sit you all down
with our composite artist,you'll describe the thin man,
and he'll draw him.
The next time he
enters this country,
we'll know what he looks
like, and grab him.
Why bother?
I'll just interview him for you.
Interview him?
Yeah, with
my video camera.
You have
a video camera?
It's in my knapsack.
Interviewing people is my hobby.
The
thin man on video--
come on, he'll never
sit still for that.
Jesus, he
really showed up.
Oh, god, are you sure wehave to go through with this?
Well, we got to.
They'll put us in jail
and throw away the key.
We'll be 40 by
the time we get out.
They are children.
What are thesechildren doing here?
I don't know.
Maybe they're having a picnic.
They can spoil the
whole operation.
They can scare the contact.
Go for it, Denver.
Go!
Go away!
Go away!
Go!
Go away!
Go away!
Zaluska.
That's the password.
They are the contact?
Zaluska!
Children,
come with us for a ride.
Haven't I
seen these kids before?
Oh, no, we're really
going to do this, huh?
Climb
aboard little boy.
Thanks.
Enjoying
your split bananas?
You mean banana splits.
I thought they were
called split bananas.
He's right.
They are called split bananas.
Did I say banana splits?
What a jerk I am.
I meant split bananas.
They're absolutely humongous.
Which one of you kids gotall those plans you sold us?
We all did.
Oscar here's father works forthe Joint Chiefs of Staff.
And Erskine's father
is a congressman.
And my stepfather is the
secretary of something
or other in the
president's cabinet.
And your father really
works with Joint Chiefs?
Uh, yeah.
He's in charge of developingan anti-tank guided missile
destroyer.
No, wait a minute.
Was an anti-destroyer
guided missile tank.
Anyhow, he brings the planshome at night in his briefcase,
and so that's how I--
That's how come he
was able to get them.
Yeah.
I see.
And which one of you
got the bright idea
of doing business with us?
That's me.
I always admired
Russia, so I thought why
not give these plans to them.
What is it exactly
you admire Russia for?
Its size.
When you look at a worldmap, it looks kind of big.
I see.
I see.
Timoshenko!
What about the camera?
What the hell
are we doing, man?
I mean--
Where did they go?
They obviously did
it for the money.
I wouldn't trust anyAmerican who says that he
prefers our system to theirs.
Just a stupid bad
joke, that's all.
They could be a
goldmine of information.
I don't think so.
What if--
Americans will neversuspect us using children.
- I'm going to do it.
- Go for it.
Never.
That's brilliant.
It's like a child's play.
Let's say you have
something for us,
so you mailed us a picturepostcard to the address
that I gave you.
So let's say if you
sign it, let's assume,
"love, Johnathan", we know thatyou planted a package for us
behind the radiator
in the men's room
on the ground floor of
the treasury building.
It is child's play, hm?
Uh, can I ask you a question.
Sure.
Could you tell mea little bit about yourself?
I'm afraid it's not possible.
Couldn't you even
tell me where you live?
That's
classified information.
Are you married?
That
is also classified.
What about children?
Children?
Yeah, do
you have any kids?
Yes, I do.
What's their names?
How old are they?
Demitri is 21.
My daughter's name
is Yekaterina.
She's what you Americans
call "sweet 16".
What do they do?
Demitri is studyingpolitics at the University.
Yekaterina wants to
manage a boutique store.
She likes fancy clothes,
and she likes money.
All they Demitri i is
to buy Levi's blue jeans
and on the black market,
and to get some tape,
something called
"Rastaman Vibrations."
Every time I talk
to them, they have
those Walkman
plugs in their ears
with a teeny noise coming out.
They say they listen
to music, but it
doesn't sound like music to me.
It sounds like
noise, regular noise.
And it frightens me.
And there is nothing
I can do about it.
I'm going to be sick.
I don't think split
bananas agree with me.
Hello, Hoggy, piano.
That's better, Erskine.
Good, Denver, good.
That happens to be the bestchamber music I've ever seen.
I don't mean to be nosy,but what's with the Band-Aid?
Oh, that?
I cut myself shaving.
Uh-uh, uh-uh.
All right, I got my first zit.
Take a look.
Hey, congratulations.
Thanks.
Welcome to the
world of zits, Ersk.
How do you feel?
Like maybe I'll
survive after all.
I think you'll survive, too.
I'm going through changes.
I'm losing myself to you.
I can't believe it
happened all so fast.
When I see myself in your eyes,I start to lose control again.
I try to take it slow,
but I can't pretend.
Will you be mine, my firsttrue love, I'm already fallin.
Maybe we'll find--
The trouble
with me is I look weird.
I think you'regreat looking for a girl.
You don't
have to say that.
I got eyes.
I mean it, Denver.
You're terrific.
Do you
honestly think so?
Anyone who says you lookweird is off their rocker.
You don't think I'm
sort of flat chested?
Not at all.
Not for your age.
I always thought you didn'twant to, you know, touch me,
because you thought therewas nothing there to touch.
That wasn't it at all.
I swear, Denver, I'll prove it.
If the offer still holds.
Go for it, Ersk.
Wow.
It's the first time
I ever actually
touched a living girl's--
Breast.
Breast.
How was it?
It was humongous.
Was it really humongous?
Really, humongous.
I'll tell you a
dark secret, Ersk.
It was the first
time for me too.
What about Morgan in
the movies and all that?
I made that up to impress you.
I'm glad my first time
was your first time.
Likewise.
Who knows, maybe we'll sharesome other firsts someday.
So how do you feel, Denver?
How do I feel?
As high as a kite.
Hey, guys!
Come on, wait up!
Come on!
Go for it.
Go for it!
All right.
You know something, Ersk?
I like you a lot.
I may even love you a little.
Likewise.
All around, you changed my life.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm fallin' love.
All along I was sure we wouldbe the same as the rest.
I was wrong 'cause the
feeling shot through me
and I confess the
things you do to make
me say your name like a prayer.
Now I believe it baby that youspoke for my love when I can't.
Bullseye, you hit the mark.
Bullseye, I'm fallin'.
Bullseye, you've got my heart.
Bullseye, I'm fallin' in love.
There ain't no way
to hold me down.
Saving it for next time
'cause that's history.
If you're not looking to getdown, do yourself a favor,
don't get close to me.
Gonna get all that I desire,now because I can't wait.
better be clearing
out the streets,
better be ready for the heat.
putting my hand right nearthe fire, all that I can take.
No way to tell where I mightgo, I can be dangerous you know.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I don't know where I'm going.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I keep on movin'.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
I got the door wide open.
Out of control!
Out of control!
Out of control!
Woo!
Out of control!
Out of control!
No one can make
me change for you.
Stand back and look at
what you've got to do.
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Go for it!
Feelin' down, don't you give up.
Go for it!
Keep on trying and don't stop!
Go for it!
Come and take your best shot.
Go for it!
Go for it!
You're feelin' red hot.
Go for it!