You Animal! (2020) - full transcript

MEAT LOINS BURGER
A DELIGHT TO THE LUST BITE! TASTE ME NOW!C

ABORTION SOLUTION
BUY ONE, TAKE ONE

FORTUNE TELLER

Goat's head, a pair of horns.

FORTUNE TELLER, WILL OF FORTUNE

Nimfa Dimaano…

You will fall in love
with two men at the same time.

What?

I don't think it's clear
that that'll happen.

The one I'm with now
may not even be for keeps.

Wild boar.



Waterfalls.

Get ready for a wild sex ride.

Now we're talking!

PAW MALL

What a day. Zero sales, again!

You said it!
All that work for nothing!

-Ready to head home?
-Been ready since 9:00 a.m.!

But Roger will come for me.

Of course. What's new?

Just take it easy
on the bumpin' and grindin', friend.

Oh, speaking of the macho devil.

Hey, stop licking my boyfriend.
Go home already!

So possessive. Bye, friend!

Hello, El Presidente.



Mr. Roger Europeo.

Good evening, Nimfa, my sexy-tary.

Are you ready to take down some notes?

Why don't we eat first?

Come on, let's get it on. It'll be quick.

I'm tired of doing it here.
Take me to a motel instead?

On the next payday, promise.
My overtime pay is coming in.

Can we please do it here?

Okay, Mr. President.

NO SEX ALLOWED

Roger.

Mr. President!

Oh, Roger.

Oh, Roger.

BEEF STEW
ANGHELL'S KITCHEN

Nimfa? Will you marry me?

Can I have some tissue, miss?

Did you just propose?
At this cheap beef stew stall?

Why not?

And what'll you put on the table?
Cheap beef stew on our anniversary?

You've got plenty to feed on
with my hot body, miss!

But I do love you!
Love is all that matters, right?

That's just a silly love song
from back in the day.

My dad probably used that on my mom.

And look where it got us.
My bun is quite content with your hot dog.

You're a janitor. I'm a perfume saleslady.

We can't get far on what we earn.

Miss! If you want to go far, just ride me!

How about you stop
paying for your sister's tuition?

How about I stop paying for our rent?

What's wrong with you? She's my sister!

It's a shame.

She has a chance to graduate
and start a better life.

But this life is good, right?
You have my love.

Isn't that what you girls look for?

By the looks of it,
she doesn't like looking at you.

Pigs! Mind your own business!

Man, that hurts.

We're not done yet!

You have yet to taste my fists.

Shit just got real!

Boss, just testing this thing out.

I think I'm dead.

I'll scalp you!

You were saying?

I surrender!

Sandwich!

JUMBO HOT DOG ON STICK
15 PESOS

Just what you need!
A beating with my jumbo hot dog!

Sir, please, no!

Manny Pacquiao!

-Hello, Linda?
-Hey, sis!

I sent you a money transfer.
Did you get it?

Yes, I got a text from the money service.

I'll claim the cash
from the store tomorrow.

How's Mom?

Mom is in the bathroom.
Any message for her?

Nothing really.
Just take care, both of you.

Please do your best in school.
How were your exams?

They were hard but I passed.

What's that sound?
Is someone crying? Is that Mom?

Yes, sis.

What? Go check on her!

Oops, no, not Mom. Must be the TV.

It's getting louder.
Did you check on Mom? She could be hurt!

Mom's no longer here.

I'm the only one here,
and I gotta pee.

I don't understand what's happening.

There! What is that?
Is that a baby crying?

The number you have dialed
is out of the coverage area.

Please try your call later.

What? Out of coverage area?
I called the landline.

So how's the scholar of Nimfa Foundation?

Riri, update on my sched today, please.

You have a phone schedule
with Governor Singsong in 45 minutes,

and then you have a viewing
of your new Tesla electric helicopter.

The unit will be delivered by noon.

Is this the one recommended by Eel-on?

Yes, Mr. Mask even referred
an experienced pilot to man it.

And then finally,
afternoon tea with Mr. Gokong-Wi

for the space station project.

Ah, yes, good. I will be attending.

By the way, Riri, how's my reservation
for Ma's birthday dinner?

Oh. Sorry, sir.

The restaurant
is fully booked on your date.

What? Did you tell them
the reservation's for me?

But, of course, sir.

Unacceptable.
Here's what I want you to do, Riri.

Call up the head of Finance.

Tell him I'm authorizing him
to withdraw 75 million today.

Have him bring it over
to the owner of that restaurant

and then instruct him to say this:

"Mr. Iñigo Villanueva just bought you."

Duly noted, sir.

Sir, a Ms. Marie is waiting for you here.
Shall I tell her to wait?

Yes, please.

Boss Iñigo!

No babe companion today?

You sure you're a valet or a paparazzi?

-Just in a good mood, sir!
-Take care of my car.

Yes, sir! Will give it a wash too.
Any other errands, boss?

-None, thank you.
-Okay, sir.

-Jerry.
-Sir?

Don't be like me when it comes to women.

Hello, Mr. Governor!
Enjoying your new car?

I hope you had the chance
to open up the trunk.

Oh, you know how stubborn
these silly labor unions are.

And that's why your "assistance"
in softening their opinion

would be very much appreciated.

Oh, hang on, just a second.

I didn't think you were this big time.

You already had my big time.

Mr. Governor,
may I call you back in ten minutes?

I need to take care
of something real quick.

All right. Talk to you later.

Coffee? Juice?
Or is it whiskey at this time of day?

No, thanks.

We both know that
that might lead to one thing

or another.

Right.

I actually just dropped by to say sorry.

Well, I am part of the tango.
She won't talk to me.

She won't even look at me.

I ruined your three-year relationship.

Sadly, I broke a serious relationship
just because of a fling.

I do think we have a connection.

Please. Being in a relationship
is the least of my priorities right now.

Wait. You're not pregnant, are you? 

Don't worry. If I were,
many would claim the baby as their own.

Like my boyfriend.

Then I'm sorry too.

CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU LATER, SWEETIE.
HUGS AND KISSES.

It's like you two
can't get enough of each other.

-Roger at home and Roger on lunch break!
-Jealous, jelly bunny?

You sure hit the jackpot with that dog!

Kind of.

Why don't you try having a boyfriend?

If no one falls for you,
you can always pay for macho escorts.

Just save up.

-I'll just wait for when you two break up.
-Dummy!

Come to think of it,
second hand comes cheaper.

You're a regular at thrift shops, right?

True that! Also, I don't mind
pre-loved if they're from you.

They're guaranteed to be of good quality.

Good men are so hard to find.

Well, if all we are talking about
is sex and companionship,

I have nothing else to ask of Roger.

Like if he was a beef stew,
he'd be the best beef stew in the world!

But?

Sometimes, though,
I need a bit of variety.

I want to taste something new.

Like steak in a fancy restaurant.

Well, then. Just sell more perfume.

When you get more commission,

even if Roger's just a janitor,
you'll have a happy life.

Of course, it's up to me again.

Hey, we're going out next week.
Want to come?

You know  I won't say no to that,
my friend!

I'll probably just end up
watching you two animals go at it.

Go rub it in my face, you mean witch.

Ma, we just broke ground
in our new beach-side development.

We're having problems with the locals,

but nothing
my government contacts can't fix.

Son, this news
about you and Irene really saddens me.

She's what, your 16th?

Eighteenth.

I thought
I'd have grandchildren by next year.

Can we drop this?

I've asked my secretary
to make reservations for your birthday.

Remember that Spanish restaurant
you've been telling me about?

Yes. My friends have a lot
of good things to say

about that Spanish restaurant.

Oh, just don't forget
to tell your sister, dear.

Yeah, I had my assistant call her also.
Any presents in mind, Ma?

My son, I have everything.
But do give me a grandchild.

Ma, if I see a baby-maker
on the way to the office,

-I'll ask her to make you one.
-Okay. Order three for me. 

So that we can ensure
the future of the Villanueva clan.

What a waste of a good name
if the bloodline ends with you.

Okay, Mom. I'll work on it.

Perfume, ma'am, sir.
Free test on your wrist.

New fragrance from Sabella.

Buy the fragrance of love, Sabella!

And forever be captured
by love from Sabella.

Thank you, ladies.

Ma'am, watch. Spray a bit on your wrist,
neck, and then into the air.

Walk through the mist, then pose!

Love is surely coming your way.

Thank you, again!

Excuse me, miss.

Hello, sir. Sabella fragrances.
Perfect for your wife.

Or…

your other wife.

No, thank you.

I dropped by
the luxury fragrances section.

There's no one there.

Sorry, sir. The saleslady
must have taken a quick break.

Yeah. Look, I don't have time.
Can you assist me?

Sorry, I don't know
these products so well.

That's fine. Let's try the testers on you.

Sorry?

-If you insist, I may be hard to resist.
-This one.

Spray it on your wrist.

-Left or right, sir?
-Left.

May I?

Miss, are you okay?
You seem pretty amused by all of this.

Not really. Sorry, sir.
Just enjoying my work assisting you.

Well, you'll probably it enjoy more
if I asked you out.

Me? Get out?

A date. We can go out on a date some time.

Date? You must be kidding, sir.
It's not right for a married man like you.

I'm single. Single and on the prowl.

By the way, do you have Tinder?

What sort of perfume is that?
I can look for it.

No. I meant Tinder, the dating app.

Never mind. What's your name?

Nimfa, sir. Short for Nimfarella Dimaano.

Iñigo Villanueva.

You know what, here's my card.

Please have that bottle wrapped.
Here's the payment.

I'll just wait here.

Let's go, Lovidub.

You're so cheesy.

-Sweetie pie.
-Yuck.

Ready to roll, mocha roll?

-What's with the pet names?
-Why are you so grumpy?

Just drive. I'm hungry.

I also want to finish
watching the movie that I started.

Okay. Let's head over
to our usual beef stew place.

Come on, huggy wuggy!

MADE IN "MANGGAHAN"

…and you're just about
to fall in love with me.

Is the story making you cry?

Or are you having a hard time
understanding the English dialogue?

Excuse me, I'm quite good with English.

I'm just not very good
at making the words come out of my mouth.

What about putting
something in your mouth?

Can we do that later, please?

I'm game, just not now.

What was that just now?

And you tell me
I'm the one who couldn't get it.

It's about a hotel staff member

who's about to fall in love
with a senator.

-But then she's just a maid.
-Oh, is that it?

Why don't you finish that tomorrow?

Let's go to the bedroom.

Hang on, the senator is finally
falling in love with the maid.

-Happy birthday to you
-Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday, Mom.

Thank you, thank you,
my beautiful daughter.

Happy birthday, Ma.

Thank you to you also.

Did you bring with you Ms. Babymaker?

-Ma.
-Just kidding!

How did it go with Gokong-Wi?
Did he give in to the deal?

Naturally, Ma.

He couldn't resist our offer
to bring in tech to fly people to space.

Wow, really, we can go to space already?

Imagine, our very own
call center station in space.

Backed up by our partner,
Eel-on's Space-Ex, of course.

So nice to hear that things
are going well with our empire!

Thanks, Ma.
Oh, I almost forgot!

Here's my little birthday present.

Thank you, son.

-Can I open it now?
-Sure.

I personally picked that for you.

You picked this for me?

What's wrong?

Well… it's a cologne.

Ma, what is it? Can I see?

I haven't heard of it before,
but… Sabella?

This is, like-- Why is your taste
so low-brow, big brother?

No, sorry. That's not the right bottle.
I'll have it replaced.

OMG! Wait, let me take a photo.
I want to post it on IG.

No. Please don't.
There's no need for that.

Do you know what's popular in movies?

What?

That thing where the woman
puffs a cigarette…

she leans on the headboard…

and only a blanket covers her boobs?

-So what?
-Nothing. Too bad, I don't smoke.

Crazy.

-If I did, I could be a star.
-Go sleep.

Hey, earlier at work,
I got to sell an expensive perfume.

This customer was so rich,
he spoke mostly in English.

Then go have sex with him.

Pervert.

If you were like him,
we'd have nothing to worry about.

Carries a load of cash
and carries himself well.

If you were like him,
we could start a family immediately.

Go sleep
so you can start dreaming about it.

29TH MONTHSARY WITH MY BABE!

YOU'RE LIKE A TOWER.
'COZ EIFFEL FOR YOU!

Quite a hopeless romantic.

ENVYING THE FISH WITH THE KISSABLE LIPS

NO TO BULLET PLANTING.
YES TO PANTY DROPPING.

Hello, Nimfa.
You wrapped the wrong bottle.

Who are you?

Don't you read names?

-Sir Iñigo!
-Yes.

Sorry about the cologne, sir.

Just return it
with the receipt. I'll replace it.

You see, I'm a busy man.

Maybe we can meet on your day off?

I have a boyfriend, sir.

I'm just handing over the cologne.

Okay, sir.

Nimfa! Baby!

Oh! You didn't have to.

Some snacks?

Are you serious, grandma?

Do I look like I want
to eat oily spring rolls!

Then don't!

Nimfa!

Here. The receipt is inside.

I'm really sorry, sir.

It's fine. You're here.

Let me walk you to the elevator.

I'm going to arrange
for the perfume replacement

first thing tomorrow.

Then, I'll come back
to deliver it on my day off, sir.

No need.

I'll drop by the mall to get it.

-My schedule's lighter next week.
-Yes!

The heck?

Looks like you're riding with me.

-Good evening, ma'am, sir!
-Shall we?

Take care, sir!

Enjoy your night with your date.
Miss, have a good night.

-Oh, no, you're still here. It's pouring!
-Yes.

Let me buy two of those yummy rolls.

-Great!
-Let's each have one.

-Too bad, you don't sell rice.
-Yeah, I wasn't able to cook some.

-Ready?
-Yes, sir.

He also washes my car.

Extra income for him.
Hardworking, nice guy.

So my employees tell me.

-Your type?
-Not really, sir. Not quite good-looking.

Hey, maybe that's why he's so nice.
To balance his looks.

Traffic. We should grab dinner on the way.

-I can just get a ride from that terminal.
-But it's still raining.

-Where do you live?
-In Sampaloc City.

Okay, before I take you,
let's pass by a drive-thru.

Sorry? Motel?

What will you have?

-Burger and fries?
-Is there pork sausage?

-Isn't that for breakfast?
-All-day breakfast, sir.

Yes, but not at the drive-thru.

Yes, but the driver has one.

-Sorry?
-A burger, please.

Excuse me, are you saying
you want to leave your girlfriend

for someone you just met?

It's because I fell in love.

Love? You mean lust!

So it's a Papa Jorge love advice
marathon kind of night.

Just getting some air.

Hey, we need to pay the rent already.

Oh, I had to pay my friend Manny.
My loan was overdue.

Can you take care of this month's rent?
I'll cover next month, promise.

Okay. Yet again.

Here, have you eaten?

Why are you home so late, anyway?

I gift-wrapped the wrong item
for that rich customer.

I went to pick up the wrong bottle.

And he gave me free food.

I already ate.

Come on, my big boss!

Can I get a feel of my very big boss?

We're leaving early tomorrow.
Did you tell your supervisor?

Yes, I said
I was going to have my eyes checked.

I might not be seeing things clearly.

Nimfa! You better not be flirting
with that customer!

-This will not end well for you!
-Come try flying this kite with me!

I'm not doing anything bad, friend.
I just hitched a ride in his car.

A break from riding a bike daily.

But bike rides are better!

Your legs are spread wide.

Your thing brushes off the seat
over road bumps.

And when it revs, it gives you chills.

But when you're wearing
a mini-skirt in a car,

the driver has easy access
between your legs.

He can stick his hand in there
even while driving.

Did he do that to you?

Nope. He's a gentleman.

Well then, that's that.
We're done with this.

Silly girl. You have a great boyfriend!

-Nimfa, come here. It's fun!
-Macho boyfriend alert.

Fine. See you later. Have fun watching us.

Nimfa, this is so much fun!

-My sweetie pie.
-You won't be able to pull that.

So the mobile load
that your boyfriend buys

is what you use to call another man?

Then what happens when it's all used up?

I'll ask for some more
from the kind one. He's rich anyway.

Hey. Your Take One's starting to get cold.

And then your house turns into a motel…

Sorry, what Take One?

This beef stew. I'm eating the Buy One,
you get the Take One.

Can't believe we have
the same anniversary as this joint.

Eat up! Happy anniversary!

-Corny.
-That was funny.

What's with you?
Your face is glued to your phone.

Just checking out posts.

And chatting with my sister
to see if she got the cash I sent.

Hey! Ms. Phone Face!

What?

What do you mean what?
What are you so occupied with?

Nothing.

If you're chatting with another guy,

you're just like this caller on the radio.

She's spending the prepaid load
from her boyfriend to call another guy.

Miss, can you turn up the volume?

Listen to me, Cora.

Have you ever heard
of the word "faithful"?

One day, I hope you will meet a man
who will do the same to you.

Use you!

Hey, is my songbird needing some love?

You look so serious.

Does my songbird want me
to sing to his bird later?

-And how about your beef stew?
-I'll bring it home.

I feel like putting on a show tonight.

PAW MALL

Nimfa.

Sir Iñigo!

Here.

Sir?

I've been waiting
for another chance to be alone with you.

I want us to be more than friends.

Nimfa, I want you to meet my friend…

Marie.

Marie, Nimfa.

Ma'am.

It's kind of weird
that you're introducing me

to a saleslady, babe.

Do you have what you came here for?

-Yeah, it's right here.
-Good. Next time, check what you buy.

Some salesladies are really empty-headed.

Shall we go? 

Right. See you around, Nimfa.

You still up?

Wide awake…

Mr. "Single and on the prowl."

What a grouch.

Don't be jealous.
Marie's just a good friend.

Bullshit!

Isn't it your day off tomorrow?
Come with me to Batangas.

Need to check
one of our properties there.

You'll be my secretary for the day.

What a shameless prick!

You already got the perfume.

There's nothing left for us to talk about!

Let's talk about you being jealous.

Not jealous, sir.
You two look good together.

May you live happily ever after. Bastard!

Aren't you the one with the boyfriend?

You have a point.

Hello, secretary!

Strictly as secretary, sir.

Please don't.

You don't like seat belts?
Better to be safe than sorry.

Sir Iñigo!

Mr. Ding, how's everything?

It's been raining lately.

But as you can see,
sky and sea are bright and blue.

Nice. We've come at a good time.
Mr. Ding, my secretary.

-This is Nimfa.
-A pleasant day to you, Nimfa.

How beautiful.

Sir, it's so big!

Sir Iñigo comes here to getaway
when it gets too much in the city.

It's so beautiful here.

I'm sure you'll love it here, Nimfa.
It's bright and airy.

All of Sir Iñigo's guests
have found this place quite charming.

Shall I show you the house?

This was my dad's.

He established
our construction firm from nothing.

His passion for construction
started when he built a bridge

to connect our house
in Koala Heights in QC to Koala Alabang.

Then soon after, clients from all over

sought my dad
for his out-of-this-world ideas,

including the first 6-star hotel
in the middle of the ocean.

And that was way before
the Birds Kaleafa in Dubai,

which we also secretly built.

This will be your room.

This will be your room?

Yes, your room.

Your room?

Your room.

-Shiggidy.
-Shiggidy?

-Shapopo.
-What?

You must be kidding.

Why would I need a room
when we're heading back home later?

So you're serious?

Sir, this can't be.

I can't bear it!
You said nothing about staying the night.

Well, didn't say anything
about not spending the night, as well.

What time is lights out?

I'll let you settle in.

Jhermelyn!

Nimfa, Roger says you're around?
Let's have lunch together!

-No, no. I'm somewhere else.
-What? Where are you, then?

I went out with Iñigo.

-That customer of yours?
-Exactly. We're in Batangas.

-Bitch!
-Ouch.

I kept telling you not to get involved!

Relax! Chill!
We're not doing anything lewd, silly.

But here's the deal.
We're staying overnight in his crib.

Nimfa! What have you gotten yourself into?

Jhermelyn, you're the only one I trust.

Can you please tell Roger

we're doing a sleepover
at your place tonight?

-Like a girls' night.
-If only you weren't my best friend.

-Please?
-Bye.

Love you!

Right, so how much delay
are we looking at again?

Yes, but from my last discussion
with Gov Singsong,

I was under the impression
that this has already been taken care of.

Never mind. I'll give Gov a call.

The sunset looks much nicer here.

That's exactly why I come over here
when I need to clear my head.

The sea is very calming.

Thanks for bringing me here.

You're welcome.

Come, sit with me.

Aren't those from the guest room?
Why'd you pick those?

-Because they're beautiful.
-They'll wither.

But they have fulfilled their purpose:
to brighten a woman's day.

-You think I'll also make you happy?
-Probably. As my boss?

You better watch yourself
when you're with me.

Why is that so, sir?

Well, I have my way with women.
You might get hurt.

Get hurt? Why, are we going to wrestle?

Yes, Wrestlemania levels!

Oh, I don't mind getting hurt that way!

As long as you do me good.

Good? Like a yummy dinner?

It's so delicious!

-Is this good? You want more?
-Yeah!

Here! Enjoy more soup.

Mr. Ding, there's nothing
quite like this sour soup!

It's delicious!

I missed this!

Everyone who's tasted my wife's dish
has been hypnotized.

Including me.
Perhaps, the secret to our marriage.

Have some more.

I've had my fill. Thank you, Mr. Ding.

I'll hit the sack early. Nimfa, excuse me.

I'll see you in the morning.
Have a good night.

But, sir.

Can I play with your sacks?
Your cojones? Your jewels?

Okay, sir.

You have a thing for your boss?

Mr. Ding, what a crazy thing to say!

He's not really my boss.
I just tagged along today.

So, you're his…

Just an acquaintance,
hoping to get lucky in love.

Be adored by this rich man.

So you're chasing his money?

No. Maybe a more comfortable life
that comes with love.

Or try out something new
even just for a day.

His girlfriend just broke up with him
because he cheated.

But aside from his sexual appetite,

he's really a nice guy.

FEEDING PROGRAM

Are you talking about Marie?

They were together just the other day.

Marie's only a friend.

If I heard correctly,

she caused Sir Iñigo's breakup
with Ma'am Irene.

Too bad.

Ma'am Irene had been with Sir the longest.

Iñigo, am I the one who'll take her place?

Will you replace my Roger?

Nimfa. Get over this craziness.

First thing tomorrow,

we're switching back
to regular programming.

I need to take a shower
and wash my conscience clean.

-Eggplant!
-Melon!

-Dangling radish!
-Veggie taco!

-Well-hung-arian!
-Oysters!

Potato balls!

Why are you here?

You told me this is my bathroom!

Yes, but it's mine as well!
Didn't you see me here? I'm not done yet!

-I'm leaving.
-No. Don't go!

Let's just give in to our burning desires.

Sir. Yes, sir.

Good morning, Nimfa.

-Hello.
-Have a safe trip home!

Do come back.

Let's see.

Hope you enjoyed your stay.

There was quite an earthquake last night.
It shook the bed, but all is in place.

Shall we go?

Nimfa, that's not
how we're going back to Manila.

Mr. Ding, is it ready?

This way, Nimfa. Come follow me.

My, oh, my.

Why not take the car instead?

Fear of heights?

No, just overwhelmed.
What about your car?

It's not coded for use today in Manila.

And I have another car
I can use when I get home.

I figured we'd travel faster
since we need to make a stop.

Things look so different from up here.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Breathtaking. I've never flown before!

Happy?

Of course, but…

But?

Last night
didn't mean anything to you, right?

Just something casual?

You underestimate my capacity to love.

And to make love with love,
for that matter.

So it means something then?

We're not teens, Nimfa.

We don't have sex just to try it.

We do it with people we like,
and eventually, love.

You had me at hello.

Did I even say hello?

So… we're together, then?

I'm pretty handsome, you have to admit.

You're too much!

Ma! I'm here!

Hello, son! This is a lunchtime surprise.

Here's my real gift to you.
Sorry it took so long.

Thanks, son.
Is the lady your gift to me as well?

Ma, this is Nimfa, my friend.

-Girl?
-Of course she's a girl.

Friend?

-Just getting to know each other.
-We'll get there in time.

Nimfa, assuming my son likes you,
and you promise to love him dearly,

please give me a grandchild already.

-What?
-Ma, we just started going out.

In and out?

Well, children, you know I'm in a hurry.

Nimfa, can you possibly persuade
your boy friend to stay for lunch?

There's paella.

I'm afraid I can't, ma'am.
He plans to take me somewhere after.

Oh, my god. Don't you just want to stay
in one of the rooms here?

That'll save you time
from checking in and out.

No. Ma, we have to go.

Okay, fine.

Enjoy your gift.

You know, I met Nimfa through that gift,
so that makes it doubly special.

Okay, son. Safe travels.

DISTRICT 1-4-3-4-4

Goodbye, Nimfa. See you again.

Not here.

Nimfa, all my cars
have super dark tint for this.

Is that what you say to all your women?

Only to you.

Everyone else was game.

Good night, Mr. President.

Thank you.

Hey, satisfied with your dinner?

Hi, Roger. Yes, I already ate.

With Jhermelyn?

Good, she told you.

Sorry, I forgot to text you.

Ouch! The hell?

You lying piece of cat,
Jhermelyn told me she wasn't with you!

You believe her more than me?

Why would she lie?
And you never forget to send me a text!

You shameless woman,

bringing that other man to our doorstep!

I'm sorry, Roger. Forgive me, please!

Get off me!

You are disgusting! Slut! Cheap whore!

Don't you dare call me that!
You're worse than an animal!

You're contented with two meals a day.

Beef stew! Nothing but beef stew!

Beef stew on my birthday,
beef stew on our anniversary.

Even on Christmas!
That's all you can afford!

You don't even wish for something better!

-So you want that rich prick instead?
-Of course!

-Does he taste like steak?
-Yes.

-Is he bigger?
-Yes!

-Is he tastier?
-Yes!

-You shitty cat!
-You poor dog!

I'm so sick of you.

Sick of this sorry life,
of having just enough.

And sometimes even having less.

You horny slut.

The moment a rich man
showed interest on you,

you couldn't even control yourself!

Get out of my house!

You get out of here!

I'm the one who pays the rent!

Tomorrow, then.

Take me to that guy first.

Now you're telling me what to do?
Didn't you just call me a whore?

If you don't do it,
I will drag you to him myself.

-You have no idea what I'm capable of!
-I know you enough!

You're a janitor.

And you will stay a janitor forever!

I do it with dignity.

You're the one who's never content.

The one with the big dreams.

The one stuck in her daydream!

I said get out!

Leave!

IÑIGO: I'M ON MY WAY, NIMFA.

You bastard!

Take this!

You've got some nerve, stealing my girl!

This is for everyone
who's been hurt in the name of love!

Feel 100 percent of my fury!

Roger hyper combo!

You're finished!

Roger, stop this!
I'm begging you, please stop!

Roger!

What's happening here?

Where's Nimfa? Nimfa!

Iñigo!

Then who's this?

Larry!

Hands up! Freeze!

Nimfa, are you hurt?

Iñigo, you snake.
You're going to pay for this.

Well, with this mess,
it looks like you're the one who'll pay.

Sir. You're really one hell of a guy.

Hello, Debbie?

Please send an ambulance
to the driveway. Now.

I'm arranging for your release.

I'd rather rot in here than see you.

Don't worry, I'm leaving.
You will be free soon.

And so will you.

Nimfa, Roger.

Are you guys okay?
Have you patched things up?

Please work things out.

You're both my friends.
Especially you, Nimfa.

You ratted me out to Roger!

Roger would've found out anyway.

I'm leaving.

I need to check on the guy
that got beat up by this macho man.

Next time,
I'll punch that asshole's lights out.

-Hello?
-Ma'am.

I'm Nimfa. I'm really sorry, Larry.
This is all my fault.

It's Jerry. You ordered the beat down?

Hey, it's not like that.

I'm just the reason why my ex-boyfriend
wanted to beat up Iñigo. 

He's actually my boyfriend now.

So he's no longer your sir?

Not anymore.
Things happened real fast, Larry.

It's Jerry, ma'am.

Whirlwind romance, as they say.

Please get well.

Iñigo and I
will shoulder the hospital bill

plus your salary while you're recovering.

Thanks, even if you caused all this.

I hope you can forgive me.

Is there anyone you'd like me to call?
To look after you? Girlfriend?

None. I just have my mom,
but she'd just end up crying.

I'm really sorry.

I have to go, I hope you can forgive me.

-He doesn't look well.
-His face is swollen.

He has seven stitches,
though the bleeding has stopped.

Maybe I'll go home to my province.
Get away from all this trouble.

Is that the best thing
for you to do right now?

My heart says so.

Well, we can go back to Batangas,
if you want.

Maybe after a few days.
I also need to go back to work.

Okay, I can arrange a service for you,
for your visit to the province.

No, thanks.

I'm sorry, Nimfa.

We're both responsible.

I also need to say sorry
to you, to Roger, to Larry…

-Jerry.
-…Jerry.

I'll take you home.

No need.

-I love you.
-You know you can still take that back.

We're off to such a troublesome start.

I'll stick to my feelings for now.

PROVINCIAL BUS

Miss, you're here.

Linda?

Ma?

-Daughter!
-Ma.

-What a surprise! What brings you here?
-Am I not allowed to be?

Of course. We just weren't expecting you.

I wanted to get away from Manila,
even just for a while.

Is there a problem with work or love?

With work.
Things are not working out with love.

Trying to be funny now, my dear?

That's what the city life does to you.
You learn to laugh at your problems.

-Sis.
-Whose baby is that?

Are you babysitting for a neighbor?

Sis, he's mine.

Yours?

As in your son?

Sorry, sis.

All this time,
I thought you were studying so hard,

not playing with some boy's hard-on!

You ungrateful slut!

I was busting my ass off for you!

I know that, sis. The baby was unplanned.

Why didn't you use contraception?

Sis, sorry, calm down.

Calm down?

I wanted to tell you,
but I couldn't find the right time.

Sister, please listen.

Listen to these break!

Nimfa! I just washed those!

I kept sending you money
so you wouldn't end up like me!

Stop it, please!

I said stop! Sorry.

Forgive me, sis.

And don't worry about the money.

I set aside some of the money you sent.

Motherfucker!

Sorry, Ma.

That was for you to finish college!

Instead of filling your brain
with knowledge,

you filled your bun with a sausage.

Get a hold of yourself, Nimfa.

Look at this baby,
it's nice to have a grandchild.

Ma, the mother of this child
is still a child, 17 years old!

Don't you want a better life?

Where you won't look for a job
every six months?

Where your groin doesn't get itchy
from wearing stockings the whole day?

And you can't even take a break,
unless you need to pee!

I'm happy being a mom, sis.

And you expect me
to provide for the baby?

My boobs should just lactate then,
instead of working nine to five for him.

I would offer my boobs
but they're no good.

Damn this life! So now what, Linda?

A single mom to that bastard?
Where is the father?

The father is at work.

Let Linda speak for herself, Ma. Please.

When the baby turns two,
Ramil and I will start a small business.

In fact, he's already taking in
some customers on weekends.

He fixes motorbikes mostly.
I can be his extra hand.

You'll probably make lots of money
servicing biker gangs!

I'll let you be. You don't need me.

Where are you going?
Why don't you spend the night here?

No, thank you, Ma.

Raise that kid well.

I got you this.

Wow, a bouquet. Thank you.

Happiest wow I've ever heard.
Those are as fragrant as your flower.

Crazy.

I've always wanted to receive a bouquet.

I saved you the trouble.

That should live longer than the ones
you picked from the guestroom before.

You think this thing we have will last?

Love works better when it is deeply felt,
rather than deeply thought of.

How deep.

I didn't know
you could speak Tagalog like that.

I got that from Mr. Ding.

That explains it.

But isn't love
made up of half brains and half heart?

Maybe one-third? You forgot libido.

Pervert.

Oh, sweet intimacy is the sustenance
of healthy relationships.

From Mr. Ding, also.

Your fountain of youth is running dry.
Maybe the pipes are turning rusty.

Ever tried it on the beach?

-You're pregnant!
-Pregnant? That was quick.

Newly married, I suppose?

Some couples are really lucky.
A goal on their first attempt.

Where is your lucky husband?

Oh, we're not married.
We just started seeing each other.

Congratulations still, Ms. Dimaano.

Take care of your baby,
you are nine weeks pregnant.

Nine weeks?

Two months and a week.

But I've only been with Iñigo
for three weeks.

You still haven't
talked to me about Batangas.

Please let me know you're okay.

Iñigo, love,
sorry I left without telling you.

I just really need time alone.

IÑIGO
INCOMING CALL

Jhermelyn!

Jhermelyn.

So much has happened these past few days.

Calm down.

I can't take it anymore.

Well, it's better you found out now.

You animals!

I always knew you were a slut, Jhermelyn!

Friend, I'm just taking
what you've discarded.

What's passé to you is still trendy to me!

You scavenging bitch!

Jhermelyn!

Leave us alone!
You have the gall to talk to us that way?

INSTANT CONNECTION

You don't belong in our world. Scram!

Okay! I'll raise our child
with a rich man as his father!

What?

You need to wait
for the right time, okay?

Thank you, Papa Jorge,
you made me feel much better.

You are welcome, young miss.

Just remember not to rush into love,
you're still young.

Slow down.

So many heartbreaking stories tonight.

To anyone with love problems,
just dial 828-LUV.

Oh, and we have one caller.

Papa Jorge, hello!
This is your love doctor.

Hello, sir.

Please turn down the radio, dear,
and speak louder.

-What is your name?
-Nimfa, sir.

Share with us your love story, Nimfa.

Well, I'm pregnant.

That's good news!
We really need overpopulation.

Is that what's bothering you?
The growing number of people on earth?

-No, sir.
-Then what?

I dislike the father of this baby.

How can you not like the father
of the child you're carrying?

-Were you drunk that night?
-No, sir.

-The baby's father is my ex-boyfriend.
-And?

-I left him for another man.
-There you go!

For a better-looking man?

-And with better social standing.
-And are you as rich?

-No, sir.
-Moving up the social ladder, eh!

That's your hobby.

You're what is called a social climber!

I met him at the mall.

-He was my customer.
-What's your name again, miss?

-Nimfa.
-Your name, Nimfa.

It comes from the Greek word "Nymph."

It refers to an enchanting
female spirit in the forest.

Now add a few letters to "Nymph,"
and you get "nymphomaniac"!

This means someone with too much libido.

That's you, Nimfa. In short, promiscuous.

I'm not like that, sir.

It's just that Iñigo has good qualities
that Roger does not have.

Of course.
Let me tell you what it is. Money.

He also smells a lot better in bed.

See! And allow me to tell you
what your real problem is.

Neither one wants to be
the father of your child!

I've only told Roger about it.

But he's now moved in with my best friend.

That's what you get!

Someone fell for Roger right away!

Which means
the guy ain't that bad, right?

Yes…

But I thought
I'd have a better future with Iñigo.

But at this point,
it's not even possible!

I'm planning to tell Iñigo
that he's the father of this baby.

What? Oh, my god! You're crazy!

You're not just a cheater,
you're an evil person!

I'm sorry!

It's the only way I can think of
to keep Iñigo's love.

My gosh! That's not love, Nimfa!
You're scheming!

Love is honesty and truth!

You're a mangga!

-How so?
-An exploiter!

MEN-GO FOR YOUR LIES!

What should I do?

Oh, my god, Nimfa.

Go to Roger and say sorry.
Go to your rich boyfriend and say sorry.

He won't accept that kid
unless he truly loves you.

Or raise the kid by yourself

and hope that you find
someone else in the future.

Okay. Yes, Papa Jorge.

And for being our caller
for the night, Nimfa,

you will receive
a gift card for Jolibog Burger.

It's bread at first bite! What a delight!

-Iñigo!
-Nimfa! We were just…

Don't make up excuses!

Aren't you that stupid saleslady?

Nimfa.

You don't belong here, bitch! 

Who are you calling a bitch?

Boyfriend stealer!

Gold digger!

I loved him for real!

He was mine first, you copycat!

I am not a copycat!

Hang on!

Ladies…

you can always… share.

Share your ass yourself!

Nimfa!

No, Nimfa!

You animal!

PAPA JORGE

"HELLO CALLER! USE THIS TO CLAIM YOUR FREE
MEAT LOINS BURGER"

Ms. Nimfa!

-Oh, hey! Larry.
-Jerry, ma'am.

Call me Nimfa.

May I call a cab for you?

I'll just catch a jeepney.

Thanks, anyway.

In that case,
let me walk you to the jeepney stop.

Just got off work, actually.

After you, madame.

How have you been?

I'm okay.
It's almost like nothing even happened.

-It's the opposite with me.
-How is boss, by the way?

MEAT LOINS BURGER

He's somewhere high up there,
not sure when he'll land.

You're not coming back?

-Never.
-I see.

I caused you so much trouble.
Can I buy you dinner some time?

Here's my number.

Can you type that on my phone?
I can't really type yet.

There.

Would you like to have that dinner now?
I know this great place.

An extra special joint.

I'm sure you'll love it there.

STEW HOUSE
ANGHELL'S KITCHEN

I really like it here.

This is Paris with a view.

Over there is the Eiffel Tower. Get it?

Nothing compares to Paris!

Are you part of a pair?

It's just me.

But someone else is on the way.

Oh, come on. You're pregnant?

And here I thought
you just ate a lot of beef stew.

So what goes well with stew?

Steamed dumplings?

Nope, it's the stew of us!

-You know what's great about us frogs?
-What?

I frog-got! But I've been toad
we are quite ribbit-ing!

Laughter, laughter!

Don't stop making me laugh, please!

Let's order some more first.
Being punny makes me hungry!

Okey.

Yeah.