Yao guai du shi (1992) - full transcript

WIZARD'S CURSE

Master Lam, according to the information,
they are here.

The ox skull is the symbol of sorcery.

They are really something.

Whenever we locate and surround them.

They can still escape easily!

I suspect that they know sorcery.

Take action.

Somebody is coming!

Come on!

Hurry up! Chase them!



White foot mark!

Follow the foot mark!

Yes.

2nd unit! Block the foot marks.

Yes.

There must be someone
who knows magic around.

What shall we do?

Surrender!

You'll get what you've done.

You are evil, if you don't surrender.

You'll deserve it!

Bastard! Go eat shit!

I don't mind eating shit if I'm alive.

But when you go to jail,
you can't eat even shit!



You'll die if you don't surrender.

Master Lam.

Give me the new bullets!

The blood of black dog?

Their sorcery is over, fire now.

Go!

Don't go!

What's the matter?

When a sorcerer is going to die,

He'll make the worst curse he can.

Who says so?

I guess!

OK, it'll be fine.

Take them away!

I have to thank you for your help.

Without you,
I can't arrest those notorious criminals.

It's our duty to fight crime.

What's the crocodile
meat you've given me?

It's great for curing asthma.

Don't mention it!
When you are back in HK,

Give my regards to your wife.

We separated.

Sorry!

But my daughter lives with me.

She is a junior doctor now.

Really? Congratulations!

Special news report: La Mit and Kim Sha,
the wanted criminals...

...have had their corpses stolen.

Police are investigating.

What's the matter?

The news said that
the corpses of La Mit and Kim Sha

have been stolen.

Should I stay behind?

It'll be OK, they are dead!

Yeah, drive faster!
Hurry to the airport.

Master, time's up.

Add in the sperm of 99 satyrs.

And the blood collected
from 99 bitches' periods.

Yes.

Master, what is a Terrific Vampire?

It is the most powerful monster.

This is the top sorcery in our field.

Why?

It can change its sex automatically.

No weapons can hurt it.

It's strong, not afraid of the sun or fire.

This is the most superior monster.

God can do nothing to it.

It eats brains.

Once it eats a brain or
makes loves with someone,

it can gain their knowledge and power.

Why did we make this?

It's the dream of any sorcerer!

If it obeys me,

I'll be the most powerful man.

Why's it so difficult to make one?

We must find a pair of lovers,

they must be hard-hearted and cruel.

They must die at the same time,

and before they die there should be hatred.

The most difficult part is,

they must both be sorcerers!

No sorcerer wants to
be used like that after death.

So they are ideal candidates.

After an hour,
the Terrific Vampire will emerge.

It'll soon come out.

Sorry, I forget to tell you...

once it emerges,

it needs to eat the
brains of two sorcerers.

If within 7 days it can eat the brain of
a girl born at the spiritual hour,

it's power will be unmeasurable!

Not even a god or
demon can defeat it!

Master!

Kim Sha, why are you alone?

You should be in the same body as La Mit!

I don't know!

Where is La Mit?

What happened?

Did the recipe go wrong?

No.

You should not have made us!

When we eat someone's brain,
we think their thoughts.

Your students hated you,
and wanted to kill you.

Now this thought is mine too!

We must find a girl who
was born at the spiritual hour.

If we eat her brain,
we'll be invincible!

Have a cup of coffee.

Thanks.

Be careful!

I feel something ominous recently!

I will be promoted in a few days,
why are you nervous?

You know, those sorcerers...

they will try to take revenge.

Don't worry! My master set a Buddha here.

If you feel uneasy, pray to it.

Honey...

How are you? Dog!

Aren't you dead?

Dad!

Go!

Go!

Help ah! Help ah!

Hands off! You monster!
I'll kill you.

Hong Kong

Doctor, I am in great pain!

Don't be so noisy!
The nurse will scold you!

So what? I'm a cop!

What's wrong with you?

None of your business!

Did you hurt your dick when taking action?

Go to sleep! You bastard!

I don't need any sleep now.

Do you want me to beat you?

Cops are no big deal!

Come over if you have the guts!

You bastard! Shut up!

I don't care, come over here.

So what?

Stop shouting!

None of your business!

I'm going to sleep!

Don't tell me you are a doctor?

Yes.

Don't tell me you are going to check me?

Sure!

You want me to take off my pants?

You can do it ourself or
ask a nurse to help you.

Miss, I hurt my dick, it's embarrassing!

Please ask a male doctor to help.

The other doctors are all busy,

you can refuse my inspection,

but you'll have to wait a few more hours.

OK!

Relax!

It's fine, just swollen a little bit.

Put some cream on and take a few days rest.

What? Are you kidding?

It really hurts!

I am in agony!

It's OK!

Miss, it's my little brother!

You are OK, you just need a cut.

Everything is fine...

...except your psychiatric problems.

What psychiatric problems?

Give him the cream.

You won't need that much,
just half that will do.

Got it!

I'll do it myself.

Do you think yours is bigger?

Can you use it up?

OK, I won't argue with you...

yours is bigger, OK?

Sorry, may I see Dr. Lam Siu-Ting?

I'm busy, look for yourself

Miss.

I'm looking for Dr. Lam Siu-Ting.

She is busy, just wait a while.

But I...

Dad, what are you doing here?

I brought you soup.

But I have no time to drink it.

Go to work.

Come here.

Come on!

Why are you bringing me here?

Come over here!

I just brought you soup.

I am a junior doctor!

I'm under training!

Don't worry. I'll do something
to change your luck.

So you'll become a famous doctor soon.

Dad, we have to follow the rules!

Do you think it's the ancient days?

So what!

Today is your birthday,
you should have some soup.

Remember,
come home to pray to your ancestors.

Hi
Hi

Uncle, it's not visiting time.

He is my dad.

How are you?

Dad!

You woke up late this morning.

Yes!

You ate congee for breakfast.

How you know that?

You courted girls last night.

Why do you say that?

I'm a Taoist!

Uncle, you must be joking!

I never tell jokes.

I have to work now.

Sorry.

See you later.

Dad, what are you doing?

Come back!

Look, there is congee on your clothes.

You have toothpaste around your mouth,
your hair isn't well combed.

You were rushing to the hospital.

You have dark eyes, so you must
have fooled around last night.

That's not scientific!

Dad!

Julian
Sorry, Julian, go to work.

Is he courting you?

No! We're just friends.

I can tell from his face.

His eyes are watery, an ugly nose.

He must be a liar.

What makes you say so?

My intelligent eyes.

Don't teach me these superstitious things.

You know I won't believe
these fortune telling!

Today is your birthday.

Come on, drink this.

OK, I'll go to work.

Come home early to pray to the ancestors.

Daughter, come out to pray!

What are you doing?

Come out and give your regards.

I'm doing my home work.

Stop it, come out and pray.

You know, dad.

I'm a catholic! I can't do that!

Your dad raised you by prayers!

Has your God given you any milk powder?

How can you...

Stop it!

I'll bow, OK?
Don't get angry!

Be sincere!

OK.

That's it!

I have cooked your favourite, abalone!

Dad, I have a date with Julian

That liar!

It's common to have a date, no big deal.

It's really a big deal!

After I took your mother to the
Chiu Chow restaurant,

and we listened to Chiu Chow songs,
she was mine.

Oh, you seduced mum!

But I'm responsible.

Don't worry! Your daughter
will not be easily cheated.

If I'm not willing, no one can force me.

But I'm afraid that you are willing!

I'll open the door.

Let me get it.

Hi, Uncle, sorry!

What's your name?

Chu Ko Ching,
you can call me Julian.

What's your birthday?

March 4, 1957.

Time?

8 am.

Come in!

Dad, what are you doing?

Are you OK?

Fine, this is for you.

It's beautiful! Thank you.

I'll fetch my hand bag.

OK.

Daughter, listen to me.

Don't go with him.

I'll be back soon.

You were born at the spiritual hour,
you'll bring benefit to your lover.

If you marry him, he'll become rich.

Looking at my ex-boyfriends,
you might be right.

One became a vice president,
and one now owns a big company.

I'm a real benefit to my worse half!

Yes!

Daughter!

What did you talk about with your dad?

He said I was born at a spiritual hour,
it'll benefit my boyfriend.

Are you courting me?

Sure I will, lets go!

Uncle, bye!

Damn! You dare to court my girl.

I'm wise to get your date of birth.

You wait and see.

Don't drink so much if
you can't handle it.

Because I'm happy together with you.

Is it your house?

Yes.

There's no-one home.

My maid is on holiday today.

You are drunk.

I feel dizzy!

Have a rest, I'm leaving.

Please, take me to the sofa.

Be careful!

I'm leaving.

I need a cup of water.

It's noisy!

Come, have the water.

Sorry, I'll clean it for you.

Stop it! I'll do it myself.

The bathroom is over there!

Undress! Hurry up!

If I can't make love with you,

I can't call myself invincible Romeo!

Damn! How dare you court my girl?

It stinks! I'll take a shower.

Close your eyes!

Why can't I see?

I'm lucky!

It's really great!

You bastard!

Let me treat you to some lustful gas.

You'll surely fall in love with me!

You can't go this time!

I'll make you happy, baby!

Change to be a female!

Now!

Is it cold today?

Why can't I find my dick?

It's gone!

Why...

But I have a different organ?

My god!

Why I...

My voice changed too!

Julian Julian
Julian! Julian!

Are you calling me?

What are you doing?

I'm looking for my dick.

We lost each other!

I want you to take care of me...

Come on!

I'm looking for my dick!

I'll teach you a good lesson, boy!

What are you doing?

How are you?

Confess now!

I love self abuse!

Also, I love peeping!

I love my dad madly!

I indecently assaulted an old woman at 10,
paid hookers at 12...

I got venereal disease at 13,
I love wearing ladies underwear!

I love cunnilingus!
Every girl I court,

I get one of her hairs for my sweater.

See... this is made of pubic hair.

What am I saying?

You...

Wake up!

What am I saying?

I'll show you my baby.

I'll show you my baby.

Ting!

Ting!

Don't go!

I have to rely on you tonight.

He deserves it.

I'll let you be a woman for 2 weeks.

Why do I feel bad luck coming?

Something feels wrong!

Are there any omens?

7Call8
Fatty, I'm in zone 8.

I have seen a broken container.

Come take a look with me please!

Fatty, hello.

Miss, why are you here?

I was kidnapped by some bad guys.

They wanted to rape me.

Are you alright?

They beat my chest.

Touch it!

I'm hurt.

Look!

Baby, go to sleep.

My son was born on 8-6-62 at 6 am.

He went to China to cure his sickness.

But he didn't contact us since then.

I'll divine for you.

Thanks.

How is it?

From this divination, he is safe.

That's good.

He'll be OK, and will be cured.

Thank you.

Good bye.

Thanks.

Is anybody here?

Is a Taoist somebody?

Sure!

What can I do for you?

I want find someone.

He is a Taoist too.

What's his name? I'll divine for you.

You should use coins.

Yes...

Tao Tao Tao...

Again, Tao...

...

It's totally shit!

I haven't told you the Taoists name!

Please go ahead.

He is called Lam Ching.

Lam Ching...

I'll check it!

Why did you hide such a
hi-tech thing from me?

It's a matter of image!

You wanna go?

Where is Lam?

Monster! What is the feud between you?

He made me suffer as what I am now.

I'm neither human nor ghost!

Even if you don't tell me,

I have my way to find them.

I'll tell you.

Be quick!

He is my junior.

He lives in Sau Chu Yuen Rd. no. 50.

Dad, I'm going out.

Are you going with that Chu?

I brushed him off! He is a wolf!

I won't misjudge anyone, see!

Sure, you are great!

I have made your favourite tea for you.

Apple polishing!
You must want something.

What do yo want?

I...

I want you to see mum.

No way!

You're both incorrigible!
Stubborn eggs!

Are you enemies?

Why did you have to separate?

Why do you never talk?

Because...

We separated because of an argument.

While there is no resolution,
we'll never get back together.

Dad, it's your anniversary in 2 days.

Why don't you...

You... girls born at a spiritual hour,

You should save your saliva!

Don't talk about that!

Saliva is nothing special!

I tell you.

The saliva of one born at a
spiritual hour can expel evils.

Your saliva would scare any devil!

Disgusting! I'm leaving!

Remember! Don't date that Chu!

Listen!

Got it!

Absent minded girl!

You remembered your stuff!

Open the door! Hurry up!

How are you?

Shut the door first!

Are you OK?

Ching! Big Trouble!

The notorious thieves
you caught in Thailand...

have become a Terrific Vampire now.

And they came to HK to take their revenge!

Terrific Vampire!

Yes, they came to the Taoist's Association.

I tried my best to escape!

So, I'll divine in front of our master.

How did you know I'm not the Taoist?

First, he never mentions my name.

Secondly,

We're not so close, he doesn't
know about my visit to Thailand.

Third, he is a poor Taoist...

if he faced a great enemy,

he would never escape.

Smart arse!

Although you are clever,

you can never escape!

Chinese Taoists can do nothing to me.

Even your Gods can do nothing to me.

See my sword!

Sword energy from my finger!

God Lui will show his force.

What's wrong?

Ting!

Dad!

Go!

Dad, what's wrong!

Spit!

Why?

Spit!

What happened?

Spit! Hurry up!

Go!

A girl born at a spiritual hour

She was born at a spiritual hour,

We must get her within 3 days.

After we eat her brain,

we'll be the king of evil spirits!

Why did you bring me to the police station?

We should report this to the police!

Our enemy isn't a Triad!

It's a monster! Understand?

So tell the police the truth!

They will say we are insane!

Who is Lam Siu-Ting?

Any Lam Siu-Ting?

Bad luck!

Any Lam Siu-Ting?

It's you, doctor!

I can't imagine a doctor
would need the police.

What's wrong with you?

I'm Lam Siu-Ting.

You were attacked?

It must be about revenge.

How do you know?

You are so cocky,
you must have many enemies.

Bastard! Don't be so proud!

Look at you!
I can tell you have bad luck.

You'll be poor all this life.

You'll never be lucky!

Your boyfriend?

Cocky like you.

He is my dad,
I'll sue you if you insult him.

You are his daughter!

That why you are the same.

Uncle, don't play tricks!

Your seat walks itself!

You kicked it!

If it walks from here to that end,

what will you say?

I'll eat all the incense
from the altar!

You promise it!

I think you needn't eat for a few days.

Bastard!

We respect the Gods here.

How can I take his food?

Cut the crap!
Lets settle our affairs later.

Sit down!

Name?

Lam Ching.

Where do you live?

All of Hong Kong

Stop it! Stop these nonsense questions.

I have got a monster at home.

Why don't you go check?

Aren't you the police?

What monster?

A monster wearing leather.

It's useless to tell him this.

It's a monster!

If he goes to investigate,
he'll be eaten.

Monster?

If you want to scare me,
talk about Triads.

Monsters will do nothing here.

See, God protects us.

I tell you, it's a monster from Thailand.

The sorcery of Thailand
is imported from India.

Their beliefs are different from ours,

our God has no relations with them.

He can do nothing to it.

Why don't you tell stories on TV?

Are you sending people to my home?

OK. I'll go with you,
if I find out it's a prank.

You'll be in deep shit!

OK!

Daughter, you can't go!
Just let them go!

Dad, let's leave it to the police.

Smartie, Fatty, come with me.

Please.

Don't take my daughter!

Are you assaulting a police officer?

Hands off!

Don't move!

Officer, don't get mad!

OK.

Do you know my gun?

Can it kill the monster you mentioned?

No!

Are you an idiot?

I'm charging you with assault of a PC.

Buddy, detain him for 24 hours.

Hurry up!

Daughter! Don't go back!

That Terrific Vampire is really powerful!

Shut up!

Don't push me, I can go myself.

Go! Take me to your home.

Nobody here.

Maybe it's gone.

Don't cheat me.

There is a room over there.

Go have a look.

Sorry...

Are you fooling me?

There is a woman inside.

Impossible! I'm the only
woman in this house.

I'll go have a look.

Where is she?

I saw her here, combing her hair.

Combing her hair here?

She was sitting here.

Are you sure?

Impossible!

He is right.

Fatty...

Come out!

How dare you enter the gate to hell?

Baby, you just make a dead set at yourself.

Who are you?

Stay back! I'm a cop!

Don't you know me?

Who is this?

That's him! He is the one we just saw.

Monster! It's true.

Don't come over!

You are gifted!

Come here, let me kiss you, boy.

You bitch! You want to eat men!

Don't come near! Freeze!

I'll shoot!

Don't faint, you have to protect me.

But who will protect me?

Who suggested coming?

It's you.

We'll be in deep shit!

Don't come over!

Go!

Go!

Has the CID, Bee come back?

I'm staying with you!

Do you think I have supernatural power?

You can go look!

I'm paid by the Queen, not you!

You ask me to check now,

maybe you'll ask for a woman next!

Idiot!

Damn it!

I'll teach you a lesson
with this laughing charm.

Once you step on it,
you won't stop laughing.

Sir, there is a snake under the bed.

Please come have a look!

Hurry up!

Where is it?

...it entered my trousers.

Old man, don't play tricks.

Or I'll charge you with
obstructing police work.

He should have stepped on it.

My daughter makes me worry!

Sir!

What?
You said there is monster in his home?

Yes.

It's a bisexual monster!

Bisexual or monster?

No! I mean it!

It can be male or female!

Are you kidding?

Please trust me!

You know I never lie!

You are lying now.

You always find excuses to avoid your duty.

You bring a doctor's note
for sick leave again.

You only work for half the month.

Miss, are you his woman?

Please mind your tongue.

I'm doctor Lam Siu-Ting!

I'll sue you for libel!

Sorry! But I just can't
believe such a ridiculous story!

Damn you!

The monster is really horrible!

Do you want to be transferred
to another team?

Please ask the SDU to kill it!

I'm afraid it'll kill more people.

Also, we're not safe.

What are you scared of?
You are in a police station.

Do you think it'll attack us here?

What's the matter?

I'm looking for a girl who
was born at a spiritual hour.

A missing girl?

I'm looking for this one.

Did you pick it up?

Do you want to die?

Gun shots!

Let me out, the monster is here.

You bastard! Don't go!

The woman is inside, go find her.

What's going on?

The monster came.

Monster?

It isn't afraid of bullets!

Listen! It doesn't fear bullets!

Get lost! Take me out!

What shall we do?

You'd better leave first.

No! What about my dad?

Let him out!

How can I do that?

If it can't find me, it'll go to my dad.

Shit!

Stop that!

Where is that girl?

Don't come over!

I'll know even if you don't tell me.

Go!

In his office!

Dad!

You are here?

Why are you laughing?

I don't know.

Give me the keys. Let my dad out.

Why do I laugh so happily?

What are you doing?

I don't know.

I'm driven mad by you!

Daughter, the monster is coming.

Go! Don't care about me!

I can't leave you alone!

You'll drag us both down if you stay.

Don't worry! I'll handle it.

Leave now!

Why do I laugh so happily?

You stepped on a laughing charm.

Take 3 male and female cockroaches,
put them in a cup of your urine,

after you drink it you'll be fine.

Shit!

Daughter, take him away, quick!

Hurry up!

You be careful!

I'll be fine! Go!

Hold it in, or we're dead!

I can't control myself!

Can't you?

Now, it's alright!

But it's useless!

Don't come over!

I am protected by God!

Scared? The ... get lost!

We are protected by God,
what should we fear?

Spit!

He fears you!

He fears my saliva!

So, spit!

I have nothing to spit!

What can we do?

I don't know!

OK, I'll give you.

Great!

Why did you bring me here?

Damn you, Taoist!

What do you want?

Where is your daughter?

She's gone back to U.S.A.

I have my way to find out.

You want to bite fingers?

I'll help you.

We're not that close, thank you!

They've gone!

Where have they gone?

Don't know!

I have my way to know.

Driver, stop here.

Asshole!

Why do you call me asshole?

If you aren't, why is it erect?

Should we give you money for a motel?

None of your business!
I have money!

Stop!

Are you angry?

I have no time to be angry with you.

We've arrived!

Where does your mum live?

It's so big?

Are you camping?

What?

If you're not camping,
why do you need such a big tent?

Are we there?

What is it?

Blood!

Should it...

Let's go!

She is my mum, I have to look.

Do you want to be killed?

Forget about me!

Blood everywhere!

Damn you hen!
You made my home bloody.

Damn you!

Look where you are going!

Mum

Why are you here?

Auntie!

Fine!

Auntie, your saliva...

It's normal!

Normal!

Because I have met my son-in-law.

Her?! Stop dreaming!

So why did you bring him here?

We are being chased by a monster!

Yes, a monster!

Stop!

Come!

Go!

This Terrific Vampire is really powerful!

What are those?

They are my informants!

The old bluffer was caught by the monster.

Is he in danger?

He's a coward!

So he is safe now.

But the vampire is really powerful.

It'll soon find this place.

Well, I'd better go!

The monster has seen you,
wherever you go it can find you.

Do you have any ideas?

Yeah!

No!

Your mum's a practitioner...

Positive to negative, negative to positive.

Small to big, fat to thin magics.

Nothing that will stop the monster.

I can't help to arrest it.

To make them big, you can
go to a plastic surgery clinic.

Why should the client go to you?

Cut the crap,
I'll look in the reference book.

I have got it!

How is it?

You were born at a spiritual hour.

You must find a virgin who's
also born at a spiritual hour.

If you have intercourse,
you can defeat the monster!

Virgin?!

Sure!

I don't mean to criticize you.

See, your eyebrow is loose,
your bottom is fat.

I think you aren't a virgin.

Auntie,
it's hard to find a virgin these days.

There is more chance of finding a dragon.

What did you say?

Isn't it true?

Shut up! Go to find a virgin.

Who was born at a spiritual hour.

Where to find one?

Go to the famous fortune teller Mr. Tung.

He tells fortunes everyday.

Maybe, he can give us some advice.

Remember the word nearby.

What does that mean?

Our target is near us.

But we don't know his name.

That old bluffer checked it already.

Remember the word Fool.

What's it?

Fool! Fooling people, got it?

He charged me 5000,
but nothing was right.

Do you remember me?

Sure, no one knocks like you.

And pays in instalments.

How can you tease me?

Shut up!

Do you have any records
of your fortune telling?

Yes.

So many books.

When will you get the answer this way?

Hurry up!

Sure!

A computer!
Why didn't you use it earlier?

Don't touch!
It's expensive.

Spiritual hour...

I...

Yes!

Come over here!

Are you a virgin?

That is my secret.

Won't you tell me?

I have the right not to tell you.

Tell or not?

You are the same as your daughter.

You love to grab my dick!

Why can't I find it?

The method of Flowerlove.

The materials needed include...

Sugar cane.

Orange.

Rain water.

Monks hair.

And urine from a snake.

And eye secretions and nose
secretions from a fat woman.

Cook for a long time...

A pure virgin will be tempted.

If you aren't tempted,

I'll chop my dick off.

Why not call the police?

Aren't I the police?

Many of my buddies were killed!

Even if the SDU comes, they'll be killed!

Shut up!

Why don't you just make love, it's OK?

I didn't want to give him any advantage.

It's not easy to find a virgin
born at a spiritual hour.

I'm much more valuable than you.

You are abnormal! Gay!

You mean I'm gay?

I think so!

What?

Is your ass more cute than mine?

Idiot!

Forget this guy!

Lets drink some soup first.

I'm in no mood to drink it.

But I spent a lot of time making it.

I'll feed you.

Come on!

Mum!

You are nice!

Brother Keung.

What do you want?

Don't get mad.

Come on!

No camping!

Oh my god!

Brother Keung, what are you doing?

Are you hot?

Oh my god!

My god!

I can hardly control myself.

Please don't come over!

How can I get over here?

You've blocked my way!

Oh, my god!

I think I'd be captured!

Come on!

I'll come first!

You scare me!

I'm coming!

It's really comfortable!

The fire is over, thank you.

Bastard! Where are you going?!

Why not have a chat first?

We've nothing to chat about!

But I have!

Shut up! I love doing it on top.

We have broken up,

because he cheated on me.

So, I'll benefit you then.

Shut up!

So you broke up because of an affair.

Still more!

His behaviour is weird!

I want!

Help! Rape! Help!

Go! You'd better go!

Please! Go!

Forgive me! Why is it a mess?

How dare you take advantage of me?

You just want to rape me!

Be frank, have you...

No, I didn't!

Because it's too hard for me to try it.

I almost lost my virginity.

Come again?

What happened?

The monsters come, with your dad.

Don't resist!

I can easily get your memories.

It's too easy for me.

Taoist! You are quite a wolf!

You love courting!

Why don't you put your hand in my trousers.

Love it?

No kidding!

It will come!

Softer, please.

Don't disturb me! Concentrate!

I'm just thinking about my girlfriends.

I have a date...

Go! Quick!

I watched you on shore...

I'm crazy about you.

I called her Cutie.

I'll wait for you.

You are something!

Sure!

Get up! Lets go!

Please make love now.

Or I can't resist the monster.

No!

Well, I'm leaving!

It's not so easy!

We've been looking so long for you.

Mum, I'm scared!

You are scared eventually!

Why didn't you do as I begged?

Now there is no time for you to do it.

I'll go out and delay them.

Mum!

What are you doing here?

Go!

Why do you take me to the toilet?

To find a way to get out.

It's locked!

Locked!

The windows are sealed!

What shall we do now?

I have got it.

Fatty, you want to burn me?

You bastard!
You brought this monster to me?

I'll give it back to you!

Fatty! Fantastic!

You want to break my altar?

Watch me!

This is harmless!

Hasn't it worked?

Get away!

How can you undress your underwear?

What did you learn?

Taoism!

That's it!

Wear it!

I'll kill you!

Be calm!

I kill...

I chop...

I'll kill you!

You don't die?

I told you you are out-dated!

Shut up!

Give the girl to me, I'll let you go.

OK, come if you have guts!

Go!

Lets go!

Are you OK?

OK?! The monster is coming!

I'll do it!

I'd better leave first, youngster!

Don't be afraid!

What shall we do now?

Go!

Bastard!

Go!

Lucky that the cop died
together with the monster!

Lets go!

Where is our daughter?

Didn't she follow?

Help!

Look! Our daughter!

How are you?

Remove the stone first!

I'm hurt!

Fatty, drag her out!

Don't touch me.

My legs and arms seem to be broken.

What shall we do?

It doesn't matter!

Where is Bee?

He is there!

Go save him!

He is under the table.

Although you are brave,
you shouldn't run like this.

I'm seriously hurt!

Stop arguing!

Where is the monster?

It was destroyed!

That's a happy ending!

I'm in deep shit!

What shall we do?

Separate them?

You think it's like a divorce?

Lets go!

Hurry up!

You go down first.

Go!

Lighter, are you a doctor?

OK?

OK, I'll help Siu-Ting.

No need! We've helped her.

Can you?

I'm a doctor too! It's just you
have a certificate and I don't.

I will do it.

Slowly!

Please, sit down

I wonder why didn't you go to a hospital?

Use your brain!

The monster is powerful!
How many hospital are there in HK?

Even we hide in a clinic, it'll find us.

But a hospital is better!

The most dangerous
place is the safest place!

We ran away from here!

The monster will never guess
we have the guts to return.

Actually I don't know what you are saying.

Cops think that it's done by Mainlanders.

Doctors can cure people only.

If the cops admit it was a monster,

all Hongkies will leave!

You can only tell?!

Shut up!

If you have power, turn!

Can I move or not?

Cut the crap!

If you have guts, show us your virgin.

Actually I don't know what you are saying.

Siu-Ting, I'm leaving.

Be careful.

Take these leaves to clean your body.

Or you'll smell of the spiritual hour,

it'll easily be traced by the monster.

Really!

I'm leaving! Bye!

I'm not superstitious!

Don't be stubborn.

The only way to defeat the monster

is your intercourse.

What happens after that?

I don't know.

So you want me to waste my virginity?

Almost every boy's virginity
goes to hookers!

Siu-Ting is so beautiful!
You're privileged!

Do you think you are so great?

I have no way to persuade you!

We had better take a plane and leave HK.

The monster came from Thailand.

If we leave, it'll come too.

Where will we end?

We are Taoists,
we have a responsibility to kill it.

We can't go this way!

And let it kill!

What shall we do then?

Yes! Even if it's fake.

Just develop some kind of mood.

I'll show you some sex films.

Shut up!

Make some atmosphere!

Doctor Chu, don't do this!

What are you doing?

Where have you gone?

Idiot! It's none of your business!

Get lost!

Sir, you can't go in.

Don't do that!

He's got the smell of spiritual hour.

I have got an idea.

Come in.

Doctor...

What's the matter with you?

I want a check up!

Check what?

Breast cancer!

You've found the right person.

I'm the expert!

You are wise to come to me.

I don't have to worry then.

Doctor...

Isn't it nice?

Sure!

You can't go!

Why?

Have you met Lam Siu-Ting?

No.

Tell me!

I don't know... I don't know...

I'll let you make love to my wife.

After mating, you'll be my slave.

You'll serve me forever!

You can go ahead now.

How?

Yeah, how?

Just care nothing!

Climb over him, suck in that thing.

Why do you teach her this?

This gesture suits this environment.

Damn you!

I'll set the protection, go ahead yourself.

Actually, I have to say sorry to you.

Why?

I don't mean to quarrel with you.

I'm afraid you'll look down on me.

So I pretend to be confident.

Actually, you are a nice guy.

Don't say that.

I'm not so open-minded.

I'm just doing it to kill the monster.

Don't worry, I'll be responsible.

For what?

To...

Keep our relationship.

How do you know I'm willing?

I'm asking you!

How is it?

Come on!

Do you think they have finished or not?

Just wait a while.

Who is coming?

It's me. I come for Ting.

You're late!

Go home!

I have something important to tell you!

You wolf! Who will open the door? No!

How does he know I'm inhuman?!

How do I know? Knock again.

Go on!

I'll burn you, for sure!

Luckily our master left
me the lotus lamps.

Or, we couldn't defeat it.

That's right!

Since it's fixed,
tell our daughter to stop now!

Go...

Look!

Why is it coming back?

Bastard, what shall we do?

Lets go!

Help!

The Terrific Vampire shows its origin!

Now we become the most powerful.

Undefeatable monster!

It's fate!

It's shaking!

Go ahead, now!

Don't panic!

It comes out.

They are going to mate.

We can't let them mate.

They'll be OK soon!
We must stop them attacking!

Watch my palm!

How can you sacrifice like this?

To give them time for mating!

The kid is a virgin,

he won't need much time.

No way! Hold it!

Take your time!

Why not try another position?

It hurts!

Success!

No! You're in the wrong place.

Fatty, I'm exhausted!

One more please.

Why?

I'm thin, you have more blood!

I'll give you blood!

Why do you have so much blood?

From this!

This is powerful! Don't waste it!

How is it?

No way!

I'll do it!

You learnt from your mum!

My mum is right!

It's finished!

What to do then?

Don't worry!

My master gives me
this which can kill evil!

Hold it!

My master cheated me!

Only you left?

You can be bisexual?
I can do it too.

Look what you have to counter attack.

If they're separated,
their power will be reduced.

Kill him!

La Mit!

Gold scissors!

My terrific charm!

It's quiet.

We killed it at last!

You did it?

You bastard!

Have you taken his virginity?

Of course! That's why we are so powerful!

Well, then get married tomorrow!

Don't be so old-fashioned! OK?

If we have to marry after each sex,
she'd have married a hundred times!

What did you say?

Go ahead!

You bastard!

I have an open mind!

Don't worry!

I won't ask you to be responsible.

Thank you then.

Do you want a present?

Thank you! It's too generous of you.

Gold scissors!

The End