Xiao lan (2022) - full transcript
Xiao Ian,
why didn't you come to me when it happened?
What do you mean?
I'm not saying that you're abnormal,
or should be punished
for doing something wrong.
But I need to let you know that
you have gone
astray.
Astray?
Yes, astray.
But I'm very confused.
Okay.
What are you confused about?
Talk to me.
Sometimes
I feel that my body is not mine.
Ian Yuyen,
why didn't you reply to my message?
You left your lunchbox on the table again.
Would you forget your own body
if it wasn't already attached to you?
If I hadn't come, what
would you have for lunch?
Fine.
Hey.
This guy really pisses me off.
What crap is he talking about?
Xiao Ian, look at this.
We just started chatting
he's already asking my cup size.
He's even asked me to
send photos of my legs.
Can this guy chat properly at all?
Some guys even want to ask me out.
So you going to meet up with them?
There's one or two good ones.
Look.
Check out his abs.
What are you doing?
Put that away.
Shut the fuck up.
Getting scared easily stunts boob growth.
Let's have a smoke.
Smoking will make yours tiny, bitch.
Xiao Ian, keep tabs for us.
Oh.
It's already very big.
Oi, why didn't you guys invite me?
Hey,
was that your mom earlier on?
You two don't look alike at all.
Local moms are super hot.
What the...
I'm going to be late for work.
Seriously, it's a problem
that you can't come.
Don't you women prefer long sex?
I want to let you enjoy it more.
Long sex is one thing,
but you can't even shoot your load.
I told you not to jerk off everyday.
It makes me think I'm loose down there.
I never said you're loose.
But you've had children,
so naturally...
I've a meeting, got to go.
After you've finished correcting
the papers, hand them to my TA.
Okay.
I won't comment any more on your grades.
Even a transfer student
does better than you guys.
You need to try harder next time.
Thank you.
Transfer TA?
Oh great TA, I've handed back my paper.
Put it away for me, thanks.
Why do that to Tuzi? -What?
Idiot. -Who's an idiot.
What are you doing?
We're late for Tech class.
Oh.
196197
so where's lot 198?
198?
It's probably just a public road.
How can it be a road?
A road can't have a lot number.
It'll have a problem getting urban renewal.
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry?
Ms. Ian, listen to me...
198 shouldn't be private...
Don't tell me shouldn't.
Just check to see if it's
included on the title deed.
If it's not, we want our deposit back,
and we're not buying it.
But the owner already got your deposit.
They came up from Kaohsiung...
Just find out who owns lot 198.
I wondered where you went at lunch.
So this is where you go.
What...
What are you doing here?
Well,
I was wondering
if lunch tastes better here.
Is yours good?
At least it's better than the school lunch.
My mom doesn't make me lunch either.
I prefer when my mom doesn't.
Once she got me dumplings.
They'd been in the freezer forever.
They stank even before I steamed them.
But I still ate them all.
Well, it's better than no dumplings at all.
I don't even get stinky dumplings.
What are you listening to?
Huh?
On your earphones,
what are you listening to?
I want to go shopping.
Want to come?
What you want to buy?
The hair remover I have
cost me $2,000 and it's no good.
Hair remover, what for?
For hair of course.
Arm pit hair,
and down there.
Don't you shave?
Where?
Down there,
otherwise it gets real messy.
When a boy gets hair in his mouth...
Damn, that's disgusting.
It's normal.
Forget it, I'm done talking with you.
See,
footballers are more handsome
than basketball players.
Schools with footballers rock.
They're alright.
Check this out.
Lots of girls follow him.
But they all got plastic
faces and boney asses.
Sorry for shooting at you.
Wu Miao, what's that all about?
Scum.
What a coincidence.
You take the MRT too?
What, only you can take the MRT?
Anyway,
did I piss you off?
What now?
Wu Chingmiao,
what have I ever done to you?
Nothing.
Only you can walk this way?
That's funny.
Another thing,
I noticed
you're missing a clip on your bra.
I saw that earlier.
Pervert.
See,
you're really missing one, right?
Don't I care about you?
But I've rarely seen a girl so...
So what?
So...
Casual.
Go on, smile.
Smile for me.
Just a little smile?
What luck,
I'm also eating by myself.
How about I buy you dinner?
How about it? -No way.
Seriously,
I've rarely met a girl
with such a good appetite.
I rarely meet people
who buy dinner just to nag.
Let's go dutch.
Go dutch my ass.
I said this is on me.
I know it's just braised pork rice,
but I really mean to apologize.
Whatever.
Xiao Ian,
even though
it's great you have a good appetite,
I actually noticed that...
What?
I noticed when you slouch down,
your belly pops out of your blouse.
Wu Chingmiao.
Here!
You're so annoying.
I don't feel like eating now.
Go on.
Have some dried tofu.
Tofu makes you pretty. -I don't want any.
It's too much for me.
I bought it for you.
I don't want it.
Someone just said I have a big belly.
I was just joking,
just a little joke.
Since we're in the same class,
will you accept my Instagram request?
I don't use IG.
What now?
I treated you to dinner,
bought you milk tea,
and you're still upset with me?
I'm not lying to you.
I really don't use it.
Check for yourself.
Isn't that my account?
You actually fancy me.
You can tell me if you do.
What the...
Hey, isn't that hot chick your mom?
Wow.
Didn't I tell you she's hot?
I'm going home.
Are you really related?
You're sure?
Hey.
You're back.
Yeah, I was having dinner with a client.
Didn't I text you that?
Yeah, dinner with a client?
Yeah, why?
So what did you have for dinner?
Braised pork rice.
What is it? Are you alright?
Yeah.
How was school?
Fine.
What is that? Your IG?
What the hell.
Will you add me?
It's not add, it's follow.
Do you even use it?
True, not really.
I closed a deal today.
Let's go out for a meal when I get paid.
Yeah.
Idiot.
Wow, someone bought you milk tea.
Who got it for you?
Don't know.
You can have it.
Fine, keep it a secret.
Hello.
Hi, that flat on Roosevelt Road...
Yes, that flat is for sale.
You guys put the flyers everywhere.
Oh, the flyers, we didn't put them up.
That was the advertising company.
You'll get fined for that.
Yes, that's right, sorry.
Sorry, got another call coming in.
I'm reporting you...
Now let's look at "The
River Merchant's Wife".
This poem by Li Bai
is well known for its...
Liu Wenzi...
What's so funny?
Teacher,
it's Wu Miao.
Wu Chingmiao, what's so funny?
Spit it out, let's all have a laugh.
Teacher, it's just...
Check this girl out.
One moment she doesn't respond,
then she "desires my
dust be mingled with yours."
If that's not saying one
thing but wanting another,
then I don't know anymore.
Say one thing want another?
How could you say that
about such an elegant poem?
Teacher, I'm not saying
it isn't très elegant.
But "desires my dust be mingled with yours"
sounds very like...
they're merging into one.
Merging into one?
I've told you many times,
with all the girls in this class,
could you not be more respectful?
Teacher, don't you worry about that.
The girls know all about that stuff, too.
Whoever knows about that stuff
can come up here and teach me.
Also, Teacher,
if people back then merged into one
when they turned fifteen,
Pervert.
Why do adults keep telling us
we can't have sex before eighteen,
or we're breaking the law?
It's sixteen.
Fine, fine.
Have we actually become more backwards?
Stand up right now.
How many times have I told you
don't talk such rubbish in class?
You enjoy standing up? Then stand up.
I said, stand up.
You're the star, so stand
up till class ends like me.
Okay, let's get back to the textbook.
Let's look at the first line.
Girls were "Maidens".
"When my hair just covered my forehead"...
Hello.
Hello?
Oh, the flyers? We didn't put them up.
You want to see the flat?
Sure, sure.
That one has just come on the market.
What should I call you?
Mr. Tsai?
Hello, Mr. Tsai.
Okay, let's look at the next one.
This is quite a nice photo.
As I said before, when you take a photo,
you need to use your surroundings.
She uses the reflection in the water
to capture the lights of the building.
Not bad, Kueiyu used the tips I taught you.
Give her some applause.
Okay, the next one.
It's a photo taken by Ian Yu...
yen.
Well...
I can't really see the point of this one.
Didn't I talk before in class
about basic composition,
about tripartition and quartering?
But you didn't use any of those.
That's okay.
You see that's the thing with photos.
Just keep trying, practice makes perfect.
Okay, let's look at the next one.
What are you doing?
I thought you were smart,
I'm skipping class obviously.
So what are you doing?
Nothing, I just went to the loo.
You're not just skipping
one class, are you?
I'm out of here.
This place fucking sucks.
Yeah, it sucks.
I'm off.
Did you just say that it sucks too?
Yeah, why?
Let's go then,
together.
Huh?
The good girl dares not to.
It's not about whether I dare to or not.
So?
Holy shit.
Mr. Tsai?
You're on time.
No need to take off
your shoes, just come in.
Do you have any other viewers?
No, just you today.
This flat is registered at 110 sq. meters.
It's 100 sq. meters inside,
so the public ratio is really low.
There's great light, too.
It's away from other buildings,
and the balcony is big.
Not bad.
Not too crowded.
Yeah, there's lots of space.
There are three bedrooms.
This is the master bedroom.
It has a changing room,
and lots of storage.
Mr. Tsai, don't worry.
My company has checked all the pipes.
You can call me Kris.
Sure.
Kris.
This sea is so fierce.
Huh?
I said this sea is so fierce.
Yeah.
I lived here when I was little.
No one goes in the water here.
I heard after a short distance,
it goes straight down to the bottom,
just like a cliff.
Look,
the tide's going out.
Wow, the Pacific Ocean.
It's really something.
So you lived here when you were little?
Yeah,
with my grandpa.
Then should we go visit him?
He died two years ago.
After the cremation,
I looked at his ashes.
I said, Grandpa,
you burned beautifully.
Do you sometimes feel
our lives are just like the waves?
What do you mean?
Drifting, drifting
so aimlessly.
Yeah.
And so meaninglessly too.
What?
Does it hurt?
What? Do your knees hurt?
Nah.
Xiao Ian.
Ian Yuyen, are you in there?
Huh?
Open the door, I need to pee.
Hurry up.
Every single time.
A new client was asking
me all sorts of questions.
Old flats have so many problems.
Why are you washing your panties?
They had a little blood.
Didn't you just have your period?
Ian Yuyen, have some fruit.
I've already brushed my teeth.
I want to sleep.
Why did you lock the door?
Because I want to go to sleep.
I'm off, what are you up to today?
I'm going out with Kueiyu.
Did I give you your pocket money?
Yeah.
Here.
You gave it already.
It's okay, just take it.
I'll let you know if I can do dinner.
See ya.
Oh.
This room may feel big now,
but a double bed will fill it up.
You could have a dressing table.
But we have a king size bed.
Big enough to roll around in.
Nah,
we don't roll around that often.
Vivi, you really like to joke around.
The fixtures are done,
and they left some furniture behind.
This sofa's not bad.
Yeah,
you could save money on a sofa.
We've already got one, no need for it.
What are you taking a photo of?
It's just I've never been here before.
This place is so cool.
Did you dress up for this?
The movie's on.
What?
I want to tell you something.
Go on, I'm listening.
What are you doing?
Someone might see us outside.
They won't, don't worry.
That day on the beach...
What about it?
Nothing.
What are you up to after this?
Don't know.
I'll see.
Stop it.
I can't do it if you keep
moving. -Hurry up.
So why you suddenly
want your eyebrows done?
No reason in particular.
Are you seeing a boy?
Who's seeing a boy?
You're the one seeing a boy.
What's the point of a boyfriend?
Who needs one.
Yeah?
Okay.
Almost done, last one.
Ouch.
That hurts.
Let me have a look.
It hurts so much.
Should I pluck your arm pit hair?
What, my arm pits? Pervert.
Cheers.
Good night.
Vivi,
you know that...
I know.
I'm a big girl.
What now? You want me to grade you?
What did I get?
（Xiao Ian to Wu Miao: What are you doing?）
Forget about it then.
Wait a second,
you're wearing contact lenses
and have a fringe now.
Damn, when did you start doing that?
What are you going on about?
Any louder and the teachers will be here.
Can I ask you a question?
How did you feel your first time?
My first time? - Yeah.
I bled, and it hurt a bit.
I know that part.
I mean how did you feel?
Feeling? Nothing in particular.
I don't know.
Wait.
Did you...
With who?
What?
Who with?
It's time for class. -Who was it?
Let's go.
Go on, tell me.
Tell you what?
I was fighting ten of them.
So what.
I was playing Lauriel so well too.
My mid lane rocks. -Delete the game,
you suck.
Fine, I suck.
Hey.
Hey.
I messaged you
yesterday, you didn't read it.
I was busy.
That busy?
I was only playing games with Wenzi.
Oh.
What?
You missed me?
Well, I just thought
you can still reply even when you're busy.
I was just playing games.
I didn't know Line had
an instant reply rule.
Or
Do I need to report everything I do now?
I didn't mean it that way.
So, what?
Not bad, nice moves.
Huh?
I said, you're quite good at that.
Oh, back in high school,
I helped out my auntie at her salon.
No wonder
you're so good at blowing.
You're the one good at blowing.
That's for sure.
Do it properly.
Sin equals -sinθ,
so what does cos equal?
Tan equals -tanθ.
But cot is not the same.
It's not plus, it's minus cotθ.
How about sec? Does anyone know?
It's the reciprocal of cos.
That's right. It's also plus sec θ.
How about cosecant?
What are you laughing at?
Who started this?
Guys,
trigonometry will be on the test,
whether it's the GSAT or college exam,
so you better pay attention.
Alright?
Now turn to page 25.
Do the first practice question.
May I?
Your pictures.
May I have a look?
Oh.
They're nothing special.
That's interesting.
What's interesting?
It's a kind of
"what's the actual point"
kind of interesting.
Stop swiping it.
Why? Something I can't see?
Why would you want to anyway?
So many secrets.
Yes,
I have so many secrets.
But seriously,
why don't you get upset
when Wenzi bullies you?
You could at least say something.
Whatever, it doesn't matter.
They're not important.
Then what is important?
What?
The class group.
I didn't mean it.
What does that even mean?
Wenzi said you sent it.
Of course you meant it.
He wanted to have a look,
so I sent it to him.
I unsent it straight away.
I didn't know he'd save the picture,
and he shared it by mistake too.
It's not the kind of picture you share.
But hey, I said I'm sorry.
And anyway,
soon everyone will forget about it.
Wenzi unsent it straight away,
so not that many saw it.
Forget about it?
The whole school has seen it by now,
how could they ever forget it?
It's not that serious, Xiao Ian.
It's just a picture.
We're fucking.
Now the whole world knows we've fucked.
What's wrong with fucking?
Is fucking illegal?
Has my fucking hurt anybody?
If women didn't want to fuck,
how could men do it?
So we're only fuckmates then?
I didn't say that.
It's all in your head.
So that day on the beach,
when you said I was special,
all of that was a lie, right?
Lie, not a lie.
Whatever you want to think, whatever.
I'm tired of explaining.
You could have said that earlier.
Was it really that difficult to say it?
Where are you?
So you can talk now, where's your wife?
You're back.
Why so late?
Have you eaten?
Yeah.
It's my girl.
Teenagers are like that.
They only talk when they feel like it.
That's right.
Yeah, I know.
Xiao Ian,
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.
I am a moron,
idiot, retard, scumbag, garbage.
Please don't be mad at me.
Please.
I didn't mean to send it.
It was an accident.
I unsent right away too.
How would I know that everyone...
Cut the bullshit, moron.
Have you deleted that photo?
Yes.
Is it on cloud?
No.
Your backup drive?
Who would be that perverted?
Someone like you.
Xiao Ian, don't mind them.
There's loads of pictures
like that
on the internet.
Don't think about it too much.
I'm thinking too much?
Fuck,
did I say something wrong?
Hello.
Hello.
What's wrong?
Nothing,
I'm not feeling well.
Not feeling well?
Yeah,
I have a headache.
Mom, where are you?
Can I go see you?
Me?
I'm in a meeting with a client.
Go to the nurses office
or go home first.
I'll go back when I'm done here.
Hello?
Fine.
Who was that?
My daughter.
She says she's not feeling well.
Kids are like that.
They say they're sick to skip school.
Last time she pulled a sickie,
she was swiping her phone in bed.
She didn't look that sick to me.
So are you going to pick her up?
Who wanted to fuck me senseless?
Well, it's just...
Didn't she say she's not feeling well?
Are you alright?
So was it really Wu
Miao who took the picture?
Does it matter who took it?
It does to me.
Seriously?
What matters is
the whole school has seen it by now.
I didn't know you were going out with him.
What difference does it make
who I go out with?
I don't see any good in Wu Miao.
Look,
now someone else is asking me out.
I want you to be all mine.
Huh?
What?
I want you to be all mine.
You want me to be...
Xiao Ian.
Ian Yuyen.
I texted if you wanted
dinner, why didn't you reply?
What is it?
You're not hot.
You got a headache?
Yeah.
Want to see a doctor?
Or take an aspirin?
Yeah...
I'll go get one.
Mom.
And a glass of water.
Okay.
You sure you don't want a doctor?
It's okay.
I just want to rest.
Okay, rest then.
Okay.
If he had shown up that day,
she wouldn't have gone away.
What does this sentence mean?
If he had shown up that day,
she wouldn't have gone away.
So did he show up that day after all?
No.
That's right, he didn't.
I said I'm sorry.
There's loads of pictures like that.
If women didn't want to fuck,
how could men do it?
So many secrets.
Whatever you want to think, whatever.
Teenagers are like that.
I'm tired of explaining.
Wenchu.
Shenyi.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Wenchu.
Shenyi.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Xiao Ian.
What the hell?
Xiao Ian, it was nothing.
You look very young.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
Hello.
Do you have any rooms?
It's $680 for two hours.
It's okay.
Should I call you when time's up?
Sure, thank you.
You want to take a shower?
What is it?
Fuck,
you're so beautiful.
You know that?
especially Vivi.
Vivi.
Hey.
What's up with our former champion?
I'm really sorry.
Vivi, you need to try harder.
Sure.
One million.
Dinner's on you.
1.5 million.
Share it with us.
You're so wet.
What?
What now,
you said you've done this before?
I have.
I found it.
Do you feel that?
The round bump.
For the first principle of
the third order determinant,
the value remains the same.
But if you swap any two rows or columns...
Xiao Ian, what time is it?
Aren't you a bit late?
I'm sorry, Teacher.
But I did call the Office this morning
to say I wasn't feeling well.
Alright, just take out your textbook.
Let's start over again...
You...
Why?
Why what?
This dating around.
Why?
Do you ask all your
fuckmates that question?
No.
It's just I rarely bump into
someone as young and pretty as you.
Am I pretty?
Not pretty,
you're beautiful.
So,
why do you?
Why?
Whoever asks first should answer first.
Why are you doing this,
this fucking around?
Because otherwise,
we would never have meet.
Do you need to go back to the office?
Nah, I've taken care of everything.
My wife asked me the other day
about the scratches on my back.
So she does care about you then
to notice that.
Yeah.
One day, she even
checked my E-Toll records.
You need to be careful then.
I'm quite careless sometimes.
People usually worry
they've left the gas on.
When I go out, guess what I worry about?
I worry that
I've forgotten to put away my vibrator
and my daughter will find it.
Damn,
you have a vibrator?
You could just use me.
You want to be my viberator?
Here you are.
Thanks.
Hey,
about the other day...
What?
Well, that day
outside the toilet...
Oh,
that's none of my business.
However, I just don't get it.
You knew I was with Wu Miao.
I knew you two had fucked.
But there's something you don't know.
Me and Wu Miao...
You and Wu Miao?
Yeah, we started doing it in 10th grade.
So now I should
give you my blessing
or apologize to you?
It's not like that either.
We're not going out with each other.
You're not?
You're not.
You two confuse the fuck out of me.
Xiao Ian,
are you still pissed with me?
Guess what, I follow you on IG.
You are super hot.
Jerk yourself off with it then,
you're welcome.
Kid,
you ready?
Very good.
Okay, next.
Ready?
What the hell are you doing?
Thank you.
But why?
I remember from your intro
that you like cheese cake.
Oh, that.
I didn't know what to write,
so I just made it up.
Well, since I bought it,
you might as well have it.
Thank you.
Is it good?
Yeah.
You want some?
Sure.
Feed me.
Okay.
Didn't you say you have a girlfriend?
Yeah.
Do you buy her cake too?
Yes,
on her birthday or Valentine's Day,
I always buy her cake.
Otherwise I'd be screwed.
Then why do you do online dating?
It's different.
Oh.
I don't even know your name.
Tim.
Just call me Tim.
Sure.
What ya doing?
Wait,
the cake.
You're so wet.
You like being fucked by me?
Yeah.
Will you keep fucking me?
Yes,
I'll keep fucking you.
And will you..
Will you fuck me forever?
Yes.
I'll fuck you forever.
I'm so hungry.
I should be the one that's hungry,
I was doing all the moving.
Stop that.
Seriously, what are we going to eat?
Whatever you want,
I can just watch you eat.
You're not going to have anything?
Nah,
I need to go home for dinner.
You can have something small.
Then I won't be able
to eat when I get home.
Oh.
So are you buying that
flat on Tongan Street?
I heard other buyers are in for it.
Is that right?
But my wife says even with a 30 year loan,
the mortgage is still too heavy.
Okay.
We'll keep looking then.
（Tell me a story then.）
Are you lying down?
Yes.
I can start so.
What do I get if I do a good job?
You can't do that.
You want me to read or not?
Okay, fine.
If I fall asleep while you read,
you can have a date.
What?
You don't want one?
Okay,
here I go.
For a long time,
I would go to bed very early.
Sometimes,
the candlelight would just go out,
and my eyes would close right away.
It would happen so fast, I'd be asleep
before the thought even crossed my mind.
Half an hour later,
that thought of going to sleep
would wake me up.
But I'm very confused.
What are you confused about?
Talk to me.
I'm very confused.
Sometimes
I feel like my body is not mine.
Huh?
It feels like a fever.
When it has a fever,
there's nothing I can do.
It's out of my control.
How can that be?
Not have any control over your own body?
Teacher,
you've got a hard-on.
What?
I see it.
It's okay, no need to worry.
You've done nothing wrong,
nor have gone astray.
You
are very normal.
Who were you calling?
My girl's school, they called a few times.
But I'm just getting the switchboard.
So how can I know who called me?
Have you called her?
My daughter?
Yes.
I texted her, and she said
she'd eat dinner herself.
Hey,
do you have any plans for the long weekend?
Why?
I'm thinking of going to
the mountains or the beach.
I've never done it on a beach before.
Is that right?
But we've planned to go camping.
By we, you mean you and her?
Yeah, and the kids too.
We booked it half a year ago.
That site is really popular.
Fine,
I got it.
What now?
You know my situation.
We both know
that only the spare time is ours.
The spare time...
Ah D,
you didn't lock the door.
What are you doing here?
You said let's have a date.
You're Ah D?
You're the one who read me that story?
I thought you'd work out it was me.
Of course not, how could I?
Why did you swipe me?
Everybody is swiping these days.
How did I know you'd respond to me?
But why date me?
Fine, let's do it then.
What the hell.
Don't mind Wu Miao,
forget about all of that.
I don't care what happened to you
or what's going on with you now.
I just want to be with you.
What happened to me?
Tell me then,
what's going on with me?
What's there to forget?
Who do you think you are?
What the fuck.
Are you nuts?
Ian Yuyen.
I didn't know you were playing around.
I didn't know you were either, at your age.
At my age?
My age is just fine, thank you very much.
How desperate are you?
Yes, your mother is desperate.
I'm desperate for men, is that a problem?
Fine, you can play around.
But where are you when I need you?
You're having dinner, in a meeting,
or you're fucking.
I'm always there when you need me.
No, you're not, you're never there.
Weren't you meant to be at school?
I was at school.
Would you ever look in the mirror?
How many boys have you had?
How many? When did this all start?
Have I ever asked you that?
Are you happy? It gives you a thrill?
Are you good at it? You
going to teach me a few tricks?
At least I get a thrill.
I've made myself happy.
But you're different.
You don't look happy at all.
I am very happy.
You don't look happy at all.
I am happy. -You look like...
I am happy. -What's happened to you?
What do you mean by that?
Have I hurt anybody?
Why is it always me that has the problem?
Why it's always me that's wrong?
Xiao Ian,
do you really know what you're doing?
Well, do you?
Breakfast is ready, hurry up.
Okay.
See,
it didn't hurt to add me, did it?
I've really wanted to come to the beach.
Actually, I came here
with a boy a while ago...
Your classmate?
Yeah.
why didn't you come to me when it happened?
What do you mean?
I'm not saying that you're abnormal,
or should be punished
for doing something wrong.
But I need to let you know that
you have gone
astray.
Astray?
Yes, astray.
But I'm very confused.
Okay.
What are you confused about?
Talk to me.
Sometimes
I feel that my body is not mine.
Ian Yuyen,
why didn't you reply to my message?
You left your lunchbox on the table again.
Would you forget your own body
if it wasn't already attached to you?
If I hadn't come, what
would you have for lunch?
Fine.
Hey.
This guy really pisses me off.
What crap is he talking about?
Xiao Ian, look at this.
We just started chatting
he's already asking my cup size.
He's even asked me to
send photos of my legs.
Can this guy chat properly at all?
Some guys even want to ask me out.
So you going to meet up with them?
There's one or two good ones.
Look.
Check out his abs.
What are you doing?
Put that away.
Shut the fuck up.
Getting scared easily stunts boob growth.
Let's have a smoke.
Smoking will make yours tiny, bitch.
Xiao Ian, keep tabs for us.
Oh.
It's already very big.
Oi, why didn't you guys invite me?
Hey,
was that your mom earlier on?
You two don't look alike at all.
Local moms are super hot.
What the...
I'm going to be late for work.
Seriously, it's a problem
that you can't come.
Don't you women prefer long sex?
I want to let you enjoy it more.
Long sex is one thing,
but you can't even shoot your load.
I told you not to jerk off everyday.
It makes me think I'm loose down there.
I never said you're loose.
But you've had children,
so naturally...
I've a meeting, got to go.
After you've finished correcting
the papers, hand them to my TA.
Okay.
I won't comment any more on your grades.
Even a transfer student
does better than you guys.
You need to try harder next time.
Thank you.
Transfer TA?
Oh great TA, I've handed back my paper.
Put it away for me, thanks.
Why do that to Tuzi? -What?
Idiot. -Who's an idiot.
What are you doing?
We're late for Tech class.
Oh.
196197
so where's lot 198?
198?
It's probably just a public road.
How can it be a road?
A road can't have a lot number.
It'll have a problem getting urban renewal.
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry?
Ms. Ian, listen to me...
198 shouldn't be private...
Don't tell me shouldn't.
Just check to see if it's
included on the title deed.
If it's not, we want our deposit back,
and we're not buying it.
But the owner already got your deposit.
They came up from Kaohsiung...
Just find out who owns lot 198.
I wondered where you went at lunch.
So this is where you go.
What...
What are you doing here?
Well,
I was wondering
if lunch tastes better here.
Is yours good?
At least it's better than the school lunch.
My mom doesn't make me lunch either.
I prefer when my mom doesn't.
Once she got me dumplings.
They'd been in the freezer forever.
They stank even before I steamed them.
But I still ate them all.
Well, it's better than no dumplings at all.
I don't even get stinky dumplings.
What are you listening to?
Huh?
On your earphones,
what are you listening to?
I want to go shopping.
Want to come?
What you want to buy?
The hair remover I have
cost me $2,000 and it's no good.
Hair remover, what for?
For hair of course.
Arm pit hair,
and down there.
Don't you shave?
Where?
Down there,
otherwise it gets real messy.
When a boy gets hair in his mouth...
Damn, that's disgusting.
It's normal.
Forget it, I'm done talking with you.
See,
footballers are more handsome
than basketball players.
Schools with footballers rock.
They're alright.
Check this out.
Lots of girls follow him.
But they all got plastic
faces and boney asses.
Sorry for shooting at you.
Wu Miao, what's that all about?
Scum.
What a coincidence.
You take the MRT too?
What, only you can take the MRT?
Anyway,
did I piss you off?
What now?
Wu Chingmiao,
what have I ever done to you?
Nothing.
Only you can walk this way?
That's funny.
Another thing,
I noticed
you're missing a clip on your bra.
I saw that earlier.
Pervert.
See,
you're really missing one, right?
Don't I care about you?
But I've rarely seen a girl so...
So what?
So...
Casual.
Go on, smile.
Smile for me.
Just a little smile?
What luck,
I'm also eating by myself.
How about I buy you dinner?
How about it? -No way.
Seriously,
I've rarely met a girl
with such a good appetite.
I rarely meet people
who buy dinner just to nag.
Let's go dutch.
Go dutch my ass.
I said this is on me.
I know it's just braised pork rice,
but I really mean to apologize.
Whatever.
Xiao Ian,
even though
it's great you have a good appetite,
I actually noticed that...
What?
I noticed when you slouch down,
your belly pops out of your blouse.
Wu Chingmiao.
Here!
You're so annoying.
I don't feel like eating now.
Go on.
Have some dried tofu.
Tofu makes you pretty. -I don't want any.
It's too much for me.
I bought it for you.
I don't want it.
Someone just said I have a big belly.
I was just joking,
just a little joke.
Since we're in the same class,
will you accept my Instagram request?
I don't use IG.
What now?
I treated you to dinner,
bought you milk tea,
and you're still upset with me?
I'm not lying to you.
I really don't use it.
Check for yourself.
Isn't that my account?
You actually fancy me.
You can tell me if you do.
What the...
Hey, isn't that hot chick your mom?
Wow.
Didn't I tell you she's hot?
I'm going home.
Are you really related?
You're sure?
Hey.
You're back.
Yeah, I was having dinner with a client.
Didn't I text you that?
Yeah, dinner with a client?
Yeah, why?
So what did you have for dinner?
Braised pork rice.
What is it? Are you alright?
Yeah.
How was school?
Fine.
What is that? Your IG?
What the hell.
Will you add me?
It's not add, it's follow.
Do you even use it?
True, not really.
I closed a deal today.
Let's go out for a meal when I get paid.
Yeah.
Idiot.
Wow, someone bought you milk tea.
Who got it for you?
Don't know.
You can have it.
Fine, keep it a secret.
Hello.
Hi, that flat on Roosevelt Road...
Yes, that flat is for sale.
You guys put the flyers everywhere.
Oh, the flyers, we didn't put them up.
That was the advertising company.
You'll get fined for that.
Yes, that's right, sorry.
Sorry, got another call coming in.
I'm reporting you...
Now let's look at "The
River Merchant's Wife".
This poem by Li Bai
is well known for its...
Liu Wenzi...
What's so funny?
Teacher,
it's Wu Miao.
Wu Chingmiao, what's so funny?
Spit it out, let's all have a laugh.
Teacher, it's just...
Check this girl out.
One moment she doesn't respond,
then she "desires my
dust be mingled with yours."
If that's not saying one
thing but wanting another,
then I don't know anymore.
Say one thing want another?
How could you say that
about such an elegant poem?
Teacher, I'm not saying
it isn't très elegant.
But "desires my dust be mingled with yours"
sounds very like...
they're merging into one.
Merging into one?
I've told you many times,
with all the girls in this class,
could you not be more respectful?
Teacher, don't you worry about that.
The girls know all about that stuff, too.
Whoever knows about that stuff
can come up here and teach me.
Also, Teacher,
if people back then merged into one
when they turned fifteen,
Pervert.
Why do adults keep telling us
we can't have sex before eighteen,
or we're breaking the law?
It's sixteen.
Fine, fine.
Have we actually become more backwards?
Stand up right now.
How many times have I told you
don't talk such rubbish in class?
You enjoy standing up? Then stand up.
I said, stand up.
You're the star, so stand
up till class ends like me.
Okay, let's get back to the textbook.
Let's look at the first line.
Girls were "Maidens".
"When my hair just covered my forehead"...
Hello.
Hello?
Oh, the flyers? We didn't put them up.
You want to see the flat?
Sure, sure.
That one has just come on the market.
What should I call you?
Mr. Tsai?
Hello, Mr. Tsai.
Okay, let's look at the next one.
This is quite a nice photo.
As I said before, when you take a photo,
you need to use your surroundings.
She uses the reflection in the water
to capture the lights of the building.
Not bad, Kueiyu used the tips I taught you.
Give her some applause.
Okay, the next one.
It's a photo taken by Ian Yu...
yen.
Well...
I can't really see the point of this one.
Didn't I talk before in class
about basic composition,
about tripartition and quartering?
But you didn't use any of those.
That's okay.
You see that's the thing with photos.
Just keep trying, practice makes perfect.
Okay, let's look at the next one.
What are you doing?
I thought you were smart,
I'm skipping class obviously.
So what are you doing?
Nothing, I just went to the loo.
You're not just skipping
one class, are you?
I'm out of here.
This place fucking sucks.
Yeah, it sucks.
I'm off.
Did you just say that it sucks too?
Yeah, why?
Let's go then,
together.
Huh?
The good girl dares not to.
It's not about whether I dare to or not.
So?
Holy shit.
Mr. Tsai?
You're on time.
No need to take off
your shoes, just come in.
Do you have any other viewers?
No, just you today.
This flat is registered at 110 sq. meters.
It's 100 sq. meters inside,
so the public ratio is really low.
There's great light, too.
It's away from other buildings,
and the balcony is big.
Not bad.
Not too crowded.
Yeah, there's lots of space.
There are three bedrooms.
This is the master bedroom.
It has a changing room,
and lots of storage.
Mr. Tsai, don't worry.
My company has checked all the pipes.
You can call me Kris.
Sure.
Kris.
This sea is so fierce.
Huh?
I said this sea is so fierce.
Yeah.
I lived here when I was little.
No one goes in the water here.
I heard after a short distance,
it goes straight down to the bottom,
just like a cliff.
Look,
the tide's going out.
Wow, the Pacific Ocean.
It's really something.
So you lived here when you were little?
Yeah,
with my grandpa.
Then should we go visit him?
He died two years ago.
After the cremation,
I looked at his ashes.
I said, Grandpa,
you burned beautifully.
Do you sometimes feel
our lives are just like the waves?
What do you mean?
Drifting, drifting
so aimlessly.
Yeah.
And so meaninglessly too.
What?
Does it hurt?
What? Do your knees hurt?
Nah.
Xiao Ian.
Ian Yuyen, are you in there?
Huh?
Open the door, I need to pee.
Hurry up.
Every single time.
A new client was asking
me all sorts of questions.
Old flats have so many problems.
Why are you washing your panties?
They had a little blood.
Didn't you just have your period?
Ian Yuyen, have some fruit.
I've already brushed my teeth.
I want to sleep.
Why did you lock the door?
Because I want to go to sleep.
I'm off, what are you up to today?
I'm going out with Kueiyu.
Did I give you your pocket money?
Yeah.
Here.
You gave it already.
It's okay, just take it.
I'll let you know if I can do dinner.
See ya.
Oh.
This room may feel big now,
but a double bed will fill it up.
You could have a dressing table.
But we have a king size bed.
Big enough to roll around in.
Nah,
we don't roll around that often.
Vivi, you really like to joke around.
The fixtures are done,
and they left some furniture behind.
This sofa's not bad.
Yeah,
you could save money on a sofa.
We've already got one, no need for it.
What are you taking a photo of?
It's just I've never been here before.
This place is so cool.
Did you dress up for this?
The movie's on.
What?
I want to tell you something.
Go on, I'm listening.
What are you doing?
Someone might see us outside.
They won't, don't worry.
That day on the beach...
What about it?
Nothing.
What are you up to after this?
Don't know.
I'll see.
Stop it.
I can't do it if you keep
moving. -Hurry up.
So why you suddenly
want your eyebrows done?
No reason in particular.
Are you seeing a boy?
Who's seeing a boy?
You're the one seeing a boy.
What's the point of a boyfriend?
Who needs one.
Yeah?
Okay.
Almost done, last one.
Ouch.
That hurts.
Let me have a look.
It hurts so much.
Should I pluck your arm pit hair?
What, my arm pits? Pervert.
Cheers.
Good night.
Vivi,
you know that...
I know.
I'm a big girl.
What now? You want me to grade you?
What did I get?
（Xiao Ian to Wu Miao: What are you doing?）
Forget about it then.
Wait a second,
you're wearing contact lenses
and have a fringe now.
Damn, when did you start doing that?
What are you going on about?
Any louder and the teachers will be here.
Can I ask you a question?
How did you feel your first time?
My first time? - Yeah.
I bled, and it hurt a bit.
I know that part.
I mean how did you feel?
Feeling? Nothing in particular.
I don't know.
Wait.
Did you...
With who?
What?
Who with?
It's time for class. -Who was it?
Let's go.
Go on, tell me.
Tell you what?
I was fighting ten of them.
So what.
I was playing Lauriel so well too.
My mid lane rocks. -Delete the game,
you suck.
Fine, I suck.
Hey.
Hey.
I messaged you
yesterday, you didn't read it.
I was busy.
That busy?
I was only playing games with Wenzi.
Oh.
What?
You missed me?
Well, I just thought
you can still reply even when you're busy.
I was just playing games.
I didn't know Line had
an instant reply rule.
Or
Do I need to report everything I do now?
I didn't mean it that way.
So, what?
Not bad, nice moves.
Huh?
I said, you're quite good at that.
Oh, back in high school,
I helped out my auntie at her salon.
No wonder
you're so good at blowing.
You're the one good at blowing.
That's for sure.
Do it properly.
Sin equals -sinθ,
so what does cos equal?
Tan equals -tanθ.
But cot is not the same.
It's not plus, it's minus cotθ.
How about sec? Does anyone know?
It's the reciprocal of cos.
That's right. It's also plus sec θ.
How about cosecant?
What are you laughing at?
Who started this?
Guys,
trigonometry will be on the test,
whether it's the GSAT or college exam,
so you better pay attention.
Alright?
Now turn to page 25.
Do the first practice question.
May I?
Your pictures.
May I have a look?
Oh.
They're nothing special.
That's interesting.
What's interesting?
It's a kind of
"what's the actual point"
kind of interesting.
Stop swiping it.
Why? Something I can't see?
Why would you want to anyway?
So many secrets.
Yes,
I have so many secrets.
But seriously,
why don't you get upset
when Wenzi bullies you?
You could at least say something.
Whatever, it doesn't matter.
They're not important.
Then what is important?
What?
The class group.
I didn't mean it.
What does that even mean?
Wenzi said you sent it.
Of course you meant it.
He wanted to have a look,
so I sent it to him.
I unsent it straight away.
I didn't know he'd save the picture,
and he shared it by mistake too.
It's not the kind of picture you share.
But hey, I said I'm sorry.
And anyway,
soon everyone will forget about it.
Wenzi unsent it straight away,
so not that many saw it.
Forget about it?
The whole school has seen it by now,
how could they ever forget it?
It's not that serious, Xiao Ian.
It's just a picture.
We're fucking.
Now the whole world knows we've fucked.
What's wrong with fucking?
Is fucking illegal?
Has my fucking hurt anybody?
If women didn't want to fuck,
how could men do it?
So we're only fuckmates then?
I didn't say that.
It's all in your head.
So that day on the beach,
when you said I was special,
all of that was a lie, right?
Lie, not a lie.
Whatever you want to think, whatever.
I'm tired of explaining.
You could have said that earlier.
Was it really that difficult to say it?
Where are you?
So you can talk now, where's your wife?
You're back.
Why so late?
Have you eaten?
Yeah.
It's my girl.
Teenagers are like that.
They only talk when they feel like it.
That's right.
Yeah, I know.
Xiao Ian,
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.
I am a moron,
idiot, retard, scumbag, garbage.
Please don't be mad at me.
Please.
I didn't mean to send it.
It was an accident.
I unsent right away too.
How would I know that everyone...
Cut the bullshit, moron.
Have you deleted that photo?
Yes.
Is it on cloud?
No.
Your backup drive?
Who would be that perverted?
Someone like you.
Xiao Ian, don't mind them.
There's loads of pictures
like that
on the internet.
Don't think about it too much.
I'm thinking too much?
Fuck,
did I say something wrong?
Hello.
Hello.
What's wrong?
Nothing,
I'm not feeling well.
Not feeling well?
Yeah,
I have a headache.
Mom, where are you?
Can I go see you?
Me?
I'm in a meeting with a client.
Go to the nurses office
or go home first.
I'll go back when I'm done here.
Hello?
Fine.
Who was that?
My daughter.
She says she's not feeling well.
Kids are like that.
They say they're sick to skip school.
Last time she pulled a sickie,
she was swiping her phone in bed.
She didn't look that sick to me.
So are you going to pick her up?
Who wanted to fuck me senseless?
Well, it's just...
Didn't she say she's not feeling well?
Are you alright?
So was it really Wu
Miao who took the picture?
Does it matter who took it?
It does to me.
Seriously?
What matters is
the whole school has seen it by now.
I didn't know you were going out with him.
What difference does it make
who I go out with?
I don't see any good in Wu Miao.
Look,
now someone else is asking me out.
I want you to be all mine.
Huh?
What?
I want you to be all mine.
You want me to be...
Xiao Ian.
Ian Yuyen.
I texted if you wanted
dinner, why didn't you reply?
What is it?
You're not hot.
You got a headache?
Yeah.
Want to see a doctor?
Or take an aspirin?
Yeah...
I'll go get one.
Mom.
And a glass of water.
Okay.
You sure you don't want a doctor?
It's okay.
I just want to rest.
Okay, rest then.
Okay.
If he had shown up that day,
she wouldn't have gone away.
What does this sentence mean?
If he had shown up that day,
she wouldn't have gone away.
So did he show up that day after all?
No.
That's right, he didn't.
I said I'm sorry.
There's loads of pictures like that.
If women didn't want to fuck,
how could men do it?
So many secrets.
Whatever you want to think, whatever.
Teenagers are like that.
I'm tired of explaining.
Wenchu.
Shenyi.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Wenchu.
Shenyi.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Chiayi.
Shenyuan.
Xiao Ian.
What the hell?
Xiao Ian, it was nothing.
You look very young.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
Hello.
Do you have any rooms?
It's $680 for two hours.
It's okay.
Should I call you when time's up?
Sure, thank you.
You want to take a shower?
What is it?
Fuck,
you're so beautiful.
You know that?
especially Vivi.
Vivi.
Hey.
What's up with our former champion?
I'm really sorry.
Vivi, you need to try harder.
Sure.
One million.
Dinner's on you.
1.5 million.
Share it with us.
You're so wet.
What?
What now,
you said you've done this before?
I have.
I found it.
Do you feel that?
The round bump.
For the first principle of
the third order determinant,
the value remains the same.
But if you swap any two rows or columns...
Xiao Ian, what time is it?
Aren't you a bit late?
I'm sorry, Teacher.
But I did call the Office this morning
to say I wasn't feeling well.
Alright, just take out your textbook.
Let's start over again...
You...
Why?
Why what?
This dating around.
Why?
Do you ask all your
fuckmates that question?
No.
It's just I rarely bump into
someone as young and pretty as you.
Am I pretty?
Not pretty,
you're beautiful.
So,
why do you?
Why?
Whoever asks first should answer first.
Why are you doing this,
this fucking around?
Because otherwise,
we would never have meet.
Do you need to go back to the office?
Nah, I've taken care of everything.
My wife asked me the other day
about the scratches on my back.
So she does care about you then
to notice that.
Yeah.
One day, she even
checked my E-Toll records.
You need to be careful then.
I'm quite careless sometimes.
People usually worry
they've left the gas on.
When I go out, guess what I worry about?
I worry that
I've forgotten to put away my vibrator
and my daughter will find it.
Damn,
you have a vibrator?
You could just use me.
You want to be my viberator?
Here you are.
Thanks.
Hey,
about the other day...
What?
Well, that day
outside the toilet...
Oh,
that's none of my business.
However, I just don't get it.
You knew I was with Wu Miao.
I knew you two had fucked.
But there's something you don't know.
Me and Wu Miao...
You and Wu Miao?
Yeah, we started doing it in 10th grade.
So now I should
give you my blessing
or apologize to you?
It's not like that either.
We're not going out with each other.
You're not?
You're not.
You two confuse the fuck out of me.
Xiao Ian,
are you still pissed with me?
Guess what, I follow you on IG.
You are super hot.
Jerk yourself off with it then,
you're welcome.
Kid,
you ready?
Very good.
Okay, next.
Ready?
What the hell are you doing?
Thank you.
But why?
I remember from your intro
that you like cheese cake.
Oh, that.
I didn't know what to write,
so I just made it up.
Well, since I bought it,
you might as well have it.
Thank you.
Is it good?
Yeah.
You want some?
Sure.
Feed me.
Okay.
Didn't you say you have a girlfriend?
Yeah.
Do you buy her cake too?
Yes,
on her birthday or Valentine's Day,
I always buy her cake.
Otherwise I'd be screwed.
Then why do you do online dating?
It's different.
Oh.
I don't even know your name.
Tim.
Just call me Tim.
Sure.
What ya doing?
Wait,
the cake.
You're so wet.
You like being fucked by me?
Yeah.
Will you keep fucking me?
Yes,
I'll keep fucking you.
And will you..
Will you fuck me forever?
Yes.
I'll fuck you forever.
I'm so hungry.
I should be the one that's hungry,
I was doing all the moving.
Stop that.
Seriously, what are we going to eat?
Whatever you want,
I can just watch you eat.
You're not going to have anything?
Nah,
I need to go home for dinner.
You can have something small.
Then I won't be able
to eat when I get home.
Oh.
So are you buying that
flat on Tongan Street?
I heard other buyers are in for it.
Is that right?
But my wife says even with a 30 year loan,
the mortgage is still too heavy.
Okay.
We'll keep looking then.
（Tell me a story then.）
Are you lying down?
Yes.
I can start so.
What do I get if I do a good job?
You can't do that.
You want me to read or not?
Okay, fine.
If I fall asleep while you read,
you can have a date.
What?
You don't want one?
Okay,
here I go.
For a long time,
I would go to bed very early.
Sometimes,
the candlelight would just go out,
and my eyes would close right away.
It would happen so fast, I'd be asleep
before the thought even crossed my mind.
Half an hour later,
that thought of going to sleep
would wake me up.
But I'm very confused.
What are you confused about?
Talk to me.
I'm very confused.
Sometimes
I feel like my body is not mine.
Huh?
It feels like a fever.
When it has a fever,
there's nothing I can do.
It's out of my control.
How can that be?
Not have any control over your own body?
Teacher,
you've got a hard-on.
What?
I see it.
It's okay, no need to worry.
You've done nothing wrong,
nor have gone astray.
You
are very normal.
Who were you calling?
My girl's school, they called a few times.
But I'm just getting the switchboard.
So how can I know who called me?
Have you called her?
My daughter?
Yes.
I texted her, and she said
she'd eat dinner herself.
Hey,
do you have any plans for the long weekend?
Why?
I'm thinking of going to
the mountains or the beach.
I've never done it on a beach before.
Is that right?
But we've planned to go camping.
By we, you mean you and her?
Yeah, and the kids too.
We booked it half a year ago.
That site is really popular.
Fine,
I got it.
What now?
You know my situation.
We both know
that only the spare time is ours.
The spare time...
Ah D,
you didn't lock the door.
What are you doing here?
You said let's have a date.
You're Ah D?
You're the one who read me that story?
I thought you'd work out it was me.
Of course not, how could I?
Why did you swipe me?
Everybody is swiping these days.
How did I know you'd respond to me?
But why date me?
Fine, let's do it then.
What the hell.
Don't mind Wu Miao,
forget about all of that.
I don't care what happened to you
or what's going on with you now.
I just want to be with you.
What happened to me?
Tell me then,
what's going on with me?
What's there to forget?
Who do you think you are?
What the fuck.
Are you nuts?
Ian Yuyen.
I didn't know you were playing around.
I didn't know you were either, at your age.
At my age?
My age is just fine, thank you very much.
How desperate are you?
Yes, your mother is desperate.
I'm desperate for men, is that a problem?
Fine, you can play around.
But where are you when I need you?
You're having dinner, in a meeting,
or you're fucking.
I'm always there when you need me.
No, you're not, you're never there.
Weren't you meant to be at school?
I was at school.
Would you ever look in the mirror?
How many boys have you had?
How many? When did this all start?
Have I ever asked you that?
Are you happy? It gives you a thrill?
Are you good at it? You
going to teach me a few tricks?
At least I get a thrill.
I've made myself happy.
But you're different.
You don't look happy at all.
I am very happy.
You don't look happy at all.
I am happy. -You look like...
I am happy. -What's happened to you?
What do you mean by that?
Have I hurt anybody?
Why is it always me that has the problem?
Why it's always me that's wrong?
Xiao Ian,
do you really know what you're doing?
Well, do you?
Breakfast is ready, hurry up.
Okay.
See,
it didn't hurt to add me, did it?
I've really wanted to come to the beach.
Actually, I came here
with a boy a while ago...
Your classmate?
Yeah.