Wrestling Ernest Hemingway (1993) Movie Script

♪ Sufro la inmensa pena

del cuento mío ♪

♪ siento El dolor profundo ♪

♪ de tu partida

♪ y lloro sin que sepa

que El llanto mío ♪

♪ tiene lágrimas negras

como mi vida ♪

♪ tú me quieres dejar

♪ yo no quiero sufrir

♪ contigo me voy

♪ aunque me cueste morir

What do you want, cooney?

I got this package for you...

Joyce, you better

put on some clothes,

or I'll call the cops.

Oh, I'll put something on

when you fix the goddamn

air conditioner.

You just going

to stand in front of me?

Say what you got to say.

It's goddamn hot in there,

and I ain't

going back for clothes.

Say, cooney,

it's kind of nice out.

I think I'll leave it out.

This is for you.

What is it?

How should I know?

It came to the office.

It's from my son!

Frank?

Yeah?

I've been easy on you

up till now.

That's 'cause you're

new, but not anymore.

Put on some clothes and

get your address straight,

cause I'm not u.P.S.

Hey, cooney!

Cooney, I was

expecting a letter!

All I got was that box.

It's for my birthday.

Let's hope

it's a pair of pajamas.

Good morning, Walt.

Good morning, Elaine.

I would like to have

six pieces of bacon

and four slices

of toast, please,

and a small juice.

I know, Walt,

and you know

what I'm going to say.

I know. Bacon's

not so good for me,

but I like to make

sandwiches with the bread.

It's good that way.

It might be good that way,

but it's not good for you.

But you want it anyway, right?

Yes.

All right.

There is a dance at

the oriole's lodge

on the 21st of July,

and there is a band, too,

coming down from Jacksonville.

It has five members, and...

Hmm...

I heard they have very

good dancers there and...

He's still here?

Um... yeah.

I know he is, Ryan.

I'm looking right at him.

That was a rhetorical question.

He's been here

since 9:00.

Has he bought anything?

Well, he asked for

following the equator.

I ordered it for him.

It'll be about three weeks.

Is he planning on waiting here?

I don't know.

That was another

rhetorical question.

Um, I did show him

the Hemingway section.

It's the damn air conditioning.

These old bastards have

nothing to do all day.

This isn't a library.

Get rid of him.

Well, what do you

want me to say?

I don't care.

Just make sure you get

the postage on that book.

He's already paid for it.

Good. Get him

out of here.

I'll take that.

Um, excuse me, sir?

Sir, excuse me.

The manager says you've

been here all day.

Yeah. I managed

to locate the Hemingway.

Oh...

Um...

Well, uh...

The manager says you've

been here too long.

I got into a wrestling match

with him once, you know.

You wrestled my manager?

You wrestled Ernest Hemingway?

I truly did.

Well, did you win?

Well, it was 1938...

Puerto Rico.

I was the youngest captain

on the Caribbean.

Ryan!

20 years old...

If you're not buying that book,

I'll have to ask you to leave.

What time is it?

It's almost 11:00.

You've been here two hours.

Oh, well, then,

I've got someplace to be.

Can you hold?

No, sir.

I don't think so.

We're receiving heavy mortar

fire on our right flank.

All right.

Jim, let's get

some mortar fire...

Heavy mortars.

Target aerial, 4807-item.

Mack!

What happened?

I'm going on over

to fox company.

There goes the bravest

man I ever seen.

Let's go, fellas!

You haven't mentioned

my new cap, Georgia.

I hadn't noticed, Francis.

Those speakers

sounded better yesterday.

Hmm. This old theater

is just like me.

We're both falling apart.

You look all right to me.

You know my boy,

he's taking me to Fort

Lauderdale for the weekend.

You know, to watch the

fireworks and what-have-you.

He sent me this hat

for my birthday.

Actually, it's not

till tomorrow.

Actually, July 3rd.

That's when he's coming

to get me.

The reason I like it, you see,

it's got this extra

deluxe feature.

Keeps the sun off your neck.

Georgia.

What's the big idea, Francis?

It's a real dog day today.

How about a double feature?

Two movies for the price of one.

It can't be bad.

You're going to get in trouble.

Who's going to catch me?

The runt?

Come on. It's hotter

than hell out there.

Besides, you haven't got a

hat to keep the sun away.

Well, it's a fine cap, frank,

but a gentleman

wouldn't wear it indoors.

I'm as gentle

as they come, lady.

22!

Yeah! Come on!

Come on, kid.

Come on.

Ball 4.

Take your base.

Hoo.

Here we go, Henry.

Remember what I told you.

Choke up.

Bat at 40 degrees at all times.

Here we go.

That's it.

Pick out a pitch.

Strike!

Ooh.

Henry, Henry, look at me.

Eye on the ball, concentration,

and follow through.

Now step in there.

Cock that bat back there.

That's it.

Eye on the ball.

Strike 2.

Go red, go.

Please. Please.

Don't swing at anything.

Don't let him intimidate you.

Pick a nice pitch

and relax in there.

Be mean up there.

That's it, baby.

Strike 3.

That's the ballgame!

Whoo!

Yeow!

Pizza!

Bring the twins.

What the hell are you doing?

It occurred to me...

That walking forward

strengthens the front

of the leg,

but it neglects the back.

So...

See these fellas

bent over at the waist?

Not me!

Straight as a soldier!

Your son called.

He called the office.

You got to get a phone, Joyce.

I'm not a secretary.

You ought to get

yourself a husband.

You wouldn't be so mean.

I had a husband.

That's how I got this way.

What'd he say?

He won't be coming tomorrow.

Something about his job.

That ain't the right message.

He said he was sorry.

He was supposed

to send me a letter.

I know nothing about

this calling business.

Just telling you

what he told me.

When he moved me

into this shithole,

he said... he told me...

He promised!

He promised that he would take

me south for the fireworks.

Don't insult my place.

Well, I guess...

I guess he's...

I guess he's busy.

His wife and...

He's got a damn important job.

You know, they...

They keep him working

through the holidays.

I mean, you understand.

Yeah.

I understand.

It was my birthday tomorrow.

Well...

I got myself a book,

a bottle of whiskey.

I think I'll take 'em

both to the park

and see which one

I can finish first.

Bet $5.00 on the bottle.

I wouldn't bet

against you, cooney.

That's a nice cap

you got there, friend.

Thank you, sir.

Of course you're putting the

back of your neck in danger

with a cap like that.

Now, the one I'm wearing

has this deluxe feature,

you see, so there's...

There's no risk.

You see?

There. See?

That's what protects the back

of your neck from the sun.

I'm talking about

the extra brim feature,

which I notice your cap

does not have.

What do you got there?

I have a bacon sandwich.

Oh.

I...

I don't... I don't suppose...

I don't suppose you could get

a hat like this around here.

My son and daughter-in-law

sent it to me

from Fort Lauderdale.

For my birthday.

You have a nice cap, sir,

but I am busy with my work.

How are you today?

Fine. How are you?

Oh, I've seen

better days, darling.

Most of 'em...

From the bow of a boat

just like that one.

Say...

Why aren't you in school today?

It's summertime.

Oh, well...

You got yourself the right idea,

hanging around the water.

Down here,

you get yourself a nice breeze.

I'm gonna be in second

grade in one month.

You take your time now...

Because these

summer days go slow.

But let me tell you, sweetheart,

the years fly by.

Yeah...

They fly by.

♪ I'm sweet Willy McGee

♪ settin' sail for the sea

♪ if you know any ladies

♪ who want to make babies

♪ send them on

♪ to sweet Willy

♪ McGee

Joyce.

What are you doing?

I was sleeping.

You fix my air

conditioner, lady?

You smell like booze.

You fix my goddamn air!

You're drunk.

Now go back to bed.

I can't breathe up there!

Stop yelling,

or I'll call the cops.

I'm melting in that room!

You'll be fine for the night.

I'll have it fixed tomorrow.

Don't walk away from me.

Don't shut

that fuckin' door on me!

I'm melting up there!

I'm dying in that room!

I'm sick.

I mean, I used...

I used to be 6'3".

I ain't even 6 feet!

I measured myself.

I ain't even 6 feet!

Uhh!

♪ I'm sweet Willy McGee

♪ settin' sail for the sea ♪

♪ happy as any

sane feller can be ♪

♪ a man fit for sailin'

♪ my cock's fit for whalin' ♪

♪ my balls, they weigh

70 pounds apiece ♪

♪ if you know any ladies

♪ who want to make babies

♪ send them on

♪ to sweet Willy

♪ McGee

I remember you, fella.

You were sittin' here yesterday.

And you were eatin'

one of those. Heh heh.

Yes. Yes.

You eat one of those every day?

No, no.

You were eatin' one

yesterday, right?

Yes.

And you're eatin' one

again today, right?

Yes.

And you're telling me

you don't eat one every day?

Yes. I don't eat one

every day.

I eat two every day.

One at 10:00

for my breakfast.

One at 2:30

for my lunch.

Your wife make 'em for you?

No, no, no, no.

Elaine makes them for me at

the Sweetwater snack shop.

It's across the park,

near the pet store.

Oh.

Well, I think I'll, uh...

I'll go buy myself

a birthday sandwich.

Say...

Do you sit around here

all afternoon?

I don't only sit.

I do my puzzles.

Oh...

Why don't you buy yourself

a fresh sandwich?

That one's been in your pocket.

No, no, no, no.

My pockets are clean.

No offense, my friend.

I just thought...

Well, I just thought you might

like to get out of the heat,

buy yourself a new sandwich,

seeing that you're

just sitting around.

I don't want a new sandwich.

Oh... whoo!

You know, god damn it!

A man can melt

on a day like this.

So... i think I'll find

myself a cool spot

and sit myself down.

Oye.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Do you think they

would mind if, uh...

I eat this one there?

You bought it there, didn't you?

Yes, of course, i...

Well, hell, no,

they wouldn't mind.

Now, if you bought it

somewheres else,

then maybe they would mind,

but not if you bought it there.

Let's go.

Are you from

Puerto Rico, friend?

No, no. No.

I am from Cuba.

I was in Puerto Rico once.

Had a mix-up with

Ernest Hemingway.

Ever hear of Ernest Hemingway?

Yes, but I am not

from Puerto Rico.

I, uh...

Well, I was, uh...

1938. I was the youngest sea

captain in the Caribbean.

Come help me.

Where are you?

Oh, where are those hash browns?

Whoops. Hold on.

Who are these people?

Hey, where you going, pal?

I'm going to my regular seat.

But this side here's got the

air conditioning, you see.

I'm sure that side's nice,

but this side's where

I get my sandwiches.

A bacon sandwich

you can get anywheres.

It's a special order.

Only Elaine can get them.

She works on this side.

Bernice works on that side.

Jesus, could have eaten already.

Hurry, Harry.

Heh heh heh.

Too late.

Sorry.

I hope Elaine doesn't

see me sitting here.

I don't want

to hurt her feelings.

It's my birthday, you know.

I'm 75 years old today.

He would have been 75, too.

Who?

Old Johnny one-eye...

The bald-headed champ.

He was a friend of yours?

Oh, ho ho.

My very best.

He was a boxer, this Johnny?

Well, he's down

for the count now.

I like boxing,

but I like baseball better.

Oh, there's a team.

I call them the little red guys.

You... you... you don't have

that problem, pal?

Which problem?

With your cucumber.

I don't eat cucumbers.

I, uh, always eat

these bacon sandwiches.

Elaine says they're

no good for me, but...

You answer questions

that nobody asks.

You're a lot like a woman.

What can I get you gentlemen?

Can I ask you

a question, darlin'?

Would there be anything unusual

about me ordering a bacon sandwich?

Yeah. It's not

on the menu.

Look, I can bring you

the bacon and the bread,

but you'll have to build

the sandwich yourself.

That'll be all right.

Thank you, darlin'.

My name's bernice.

See?

You can order them anywheres.

She didn't say not to eat it.

Why would she say that?

Elaine always says

not to eat them.

She says they're no good for me.

Bernice didn't say anything.

Walter's here.

He was here this morning.

Well, he's back.

What's he doing on that side?

I have no idea.

He's with a real loudmouth.

Yeah, I captained boats,

charters, merchants.

I've been to

Puerto Rico many times.

But I'm not from Puerto Rico.

There's an empty table

on the other side.

I started sailing when I was 14.

I'll move.

I don't want

to hurt her feelings.

Twice in one day?

What's the occasion?

Ooh.

Hi.

It's my birthday.

And who are you?

Francis Joyce.

How old are you?

I'm 70 years old...

Today.

Then you're old enough to know

you shouldn't wear a hat inside.

This is no ordinary goddamn hat.

That's true.

And you.

You're breaking my heart

sitting in bernice's section

when there's a table

open in mine.

Miss?

Hey, you.

You should not swear to her.

Hmm?

I didn't say a goddamn thing.

You said goddamn,

and you told me you were 75.

I am, for Christ's sakes.

You told Elaine you were 70.

When I saw her,

I felt like I was 70 again.

Oh.

Oh...

She's got a great backyard.

I don't know. I...

I've never been to her house.

I'm talking about her ass.

Excuse me.

Where you going?

There are seats open

in Elaine's section.

I don't want

to hurt her feelings.

Excuse me.

This seat is occupied.

You're damn right it is,

and my tired ass is not moving.

My friend sits there.

Is this an imaginary friend?

No. She's real.

She's just late.

She can stand, then.

Besides, if you're

a decent gentleman,

you'll give her your seat.

Hey.

Hi, Walter.

Oh, no, no, no.

You sit.

I can stand.

Sit. You stand up

all day at work.

I sit all day.

You should live in Sweetwater,

then you won't have to take

the bus to work every day.

Then I wouldn't see you

every afternoon.

So who's your friend?

Friend? Oh, no, no.

I o-only met him in the park.

I think he had

slept there all night.

I've never seen you in there

with anybody else before.

That's too much eating alone.

That's almost as bad for

you as those sandwiches.

He wanted to know

a good place to eat,

so I told him

the Sweetwater snack shop

has the best food.

You've only had one thing

there, Walter.

It's not even on the menu.

I told him anyway for good

business for you, see?

O.k. Thank you.

Oh, he's 75.

He told you he was 70.

He's 75. He knows you

for only one minute,

and already he's saying

one lie and one curse.

And... he's...

Some guys swear all the time.

There was a man

at the oriole's lodge.

He swore so much.

For two weeks,

I didn't know he was speaking English.

I never heard

those words before.

Never.

Have you ever been

to the oriole's lodge?

I didn't think they

allowed women there.

No, no. Women can come

on certain nights.

Really?

Yeah, for dances.

Yes, yes, yes.

They have them once a year,

those dances, for summer.

They're very nice I heard.

Yes, and they have

a dinner, decorations,

and, uh...

Blue napkins, and, uh...

Sometimes a band comes

down from Jacksonville.

Yeah. It's o.K. Yes, yes.

It sounds nice.

Yeah. Oh, yes.

Thanks, Earl.

Have a good evening, Elaine.

Bye, Earl.

Watch your step, folks.

O.k., end of

the line, Walt.

We'll see you tomorrow, Walt?

See you tomorrow, Earl.

All righty.

You smell so good.

I washed my hair for you.

I knew we'd be together, so I...

Ahh, I love you, Johnny.

I love you.

I love you so much,

I ache inside.

I feel the same way,

too, Johnny.

Feel my heart pounding.

Mine's the same.

What do you think

you're doing, mister?

I'm sitting here next to you...

Watching the movie.

You ask when you want

to sit next to a lady.

Well, can I sit here?

Yes, you may.

Just what do you think

you're doing now?

You said I could sit here.

I said you could sit here.

I didn't say you could

sit here today.

You have to make plans

for something like that.

You can sit

next to me Saturday...

For the early show.

Sit somewhere else now.

First you can sit.

Now you can't sit.

Come in. Now you

can't come in.

Touch me.

You can't touch me.

It could drive you crazy.

I thought your son

was taking you to Fort

Lauderdale for the weekend.

Oh, now you want to talk to me.

This would be a lot easier

if I was sitting up there.

There's the idea.

Got to be a lot better

than staring at the back

of your head.

We'll discuss that on Saturday.

Hi.

Afternoon, ma'am.

Why the hell are you here?

I'm freezing my ass off.

Heh heh heh heh.

Ooh!

Brrr!

Ooh!

I've got something...

In here for you,

a testament to

last night's sobriety.

You were really sober

last night.

I was sober enough

to know I was drunk.

I got you some guinness, cooney.

Good old Irish stuff.

You know, two old Irish dogs

should not be barking

at each other.

That's nice, Joyce,

only I ain't Irish.

What the hell

kind of a name is cooney

if it ain't Irish?

That husband I had,

he was Irish.

He left.

I got stuck with the name.

It's a good name.

How long were you

married to the guy?

14 years.

Oh, well, you did your time.

You're Irish enough.

Here.

No, thanks, frank.

14 years with him,

I got no taste

for anything Irish.

Oh...

Irish...

Wool?

No.

♪ Irish eyes

no.

Irish...

Whiskey?

Mmm.

One more year, he'd

have killed that, too,

but he left just in time.

Ha ha!

Well, it's a sorry sea captain

who's got no Irish whiskey.

Heh heh heh.

I'll get it, and we'll

christen the new air machine.

I stayed with him long enough

to raise suspicions

that you confirm, Joyce.

And what would those be?

That the Irish are

foul-mouthed, lazy bastards

who parade around naked.

Ha ha ha!

We'll call her

the s.S. Cooney.

Oh, that's quite an honor.

I'm not naming her after you.

I'm naming her after that

suffering bastard Mr. Cooney

and the 14 years of hell

you put him through.

Ahh.

It's closed.

I can see that.

This is bad news.

I thought you was in the

park this time of day.

They must have

closed early today.

Well, this is no ordinary day.

This is the fourth of July.

I know what today is.

I know.

What am I supposed

to do for lunch?

Well...

Heh heh heh.

She will be at the fireworks.

Who?

Elaine.

Oh. Heh heh.

You get the fireworks here?

No, we don't get

the fireworks here,

only in Carter bay,

where Elaine lives.

She will be there, probably.

Ah.

I'd like to have seen

the fireworks show.

Mmm. Me, too, but

they are miles away,

even 6, possibly,

and there is no bus today.

That's too much to walk.

Ha ha.

I think I might drive.

You drive?

Heh heh heh.

Sure.

Hmm.

I wish the bus was working.

I would take it

to the fireworks.

Ho... ha.

Ahh.

You're hungry, huh?

Yes, I am.

But all the restaurants

are closed.

There is nothing to eat

from here to Carter bay today...

I bet.

Only this sandwich.

♪ Buenamente te ha fijado ♪

♪ como camina la gente

♪ cuando sales del mercado ♪

♪ la mujer de antoñio camina ♪

♪ cuando vine de la Plaza ♪

♪ camínase

♪ cuando traigas agua

♪ camínase

♪ la mujer de antoñio

♪ camínase

♪ por la madrugada...

You say we were driving, frank.

This is not driving.

This is riding.

Back there you're riding.

Up front, I'm driving.

I've got the steering

to worry about.

It would be easier

if you'd pedal.

They're moving too fast.

I'm 80 years old.

If you don't start pedaling,

I'll die before we get there!

You said you were 75.

I was exaggerating

to make a point!

Now, look...

Pedal.

Pedal!

Frank.

What?

Uh...

What?

Do you think we could

find a rest room?

The next one we see.

Just pedal for a while,

will you?

Pedal!

I don't think they have

rest rooms out here.

I don't think they have

rest rooms out here, frank.

I'll find you a bathroom

after we finish the sandwich.

Oh.

I was a barber.

I cut my own hair.

Yes. I can tell.

Say, you look like you

got some Italian in you.

No. I'm not Italian.

A good haircut makes

a man look respectable.

My first wife was Italian.

I'm not Italian.

I was good.

I could make you look like a...

Gentleman.

We met at St. Kitts.

I was 20 years old.

Her name...

Was Isabel.

Boy...

She loved to screw.

Not just with me.

That was part of our problem.

I...

I don't think

about her that much.

But she was Italian.

Of course...

She's probably dead by now.

God rest her soul.

Amen.

She could use the rest.

Frank?

Yeah?

Uh, we just rest

for a minute and...

Maybe find a rest room.

Hunh.

Mmm.

I want to get

to the fireworks on time.

You ain't tired?

I ain't tired.

Frank?

Frank!

We are missing the fireworks!

Ha ha ha!

Oh, how perfectly!

Ha ha ha ha!

I still need to

find the rest room.

Ha ha ha!

We are missing the fireworks.

We are missing them.

We are missing

the fireworks, frank.

I was 17 the first time

I got laid.

Heh heh heh.

It was on a barge

sailing to freeport.

She had to be 40 years old.

Oh.

40.

I spoke just three words to her.

I told her that...

I told her that I loved her.

We should leave now, frank!

I did love her...

For about seven seconds.

I remember.

Walt...

Walt, sit down with me.

No. You trick me

to come here,

say you had a car,

then make me drive a bike.

Have a drink with me, Walt.

You say you find me a rest room.

Now I'm standing on a rock

far away from other people,

and I still have to pee, frank!

Wait.

O.k., Walt.

I promised I'd find you...

A bathroom.

I promised I'd take you

to the fireworks.

Come here.

What do you see out there?

I see some fireworks.

Now, Walt...

Reach in,

take out your pecker,

and feed the fish.

Feed the fish?

Piss in the ocean.

You have to pee, too?

I'm 75 years old.

I always have to pee.

Heh heh heh.

O.k.

Oh!

Hoo hoo hoo!

Heh heh.

Walt?

Can you remember...

When this didn't take so long?

Sometimes I think I'll fall

asleep standing like this,

I wait so long.

Ha ha ha!

Ooh.

Oh.

Feeding the fish.

Ahh.

Ahh, feeding the fish.

Oh.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Ahh.

Siéntate conmigo.

You can speak Spanish, yeah?

Yeah.

Um...

Tú eres...

Una mujer muy...

Hermosa.

Heh heh heh.

What else can you say?

Ah, a few phrases.

Help me get through

some lonely nights.

Yo quiero desayunar

desnudo contigo.

Ha ha ha!

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Ha ha ha!

You speak very well.

I had a lot of practice.

Frank, that woman

you were talking about?

You slept with her

only after three words?

Well... well, actually,

the words sort of

came in the middle.

The $4.00 came before.

I'll tell you all about it,

but first...

Toma un trago...

Conmigo.

Toma un trago...

Conmigo.

Muchas gracias.

You're welcome.

Now, now, I'll tell you.

First time I saw her...

Ha ha ha!

Her tits were smiling

at me across the room.

Boom!

And she looked at me...

And I said, "oh..."

Let's go!

Come on, Mickey!

O.k., now, be aggressive

out there, right, kiddo?

Remember the three as...

Aggressiveness,

attitude, ability.

Go, Sweetwater!

Yay!

Hey, batter, batter,

batter, batter.

Hey, batter, batter,

batter, batter.

Here we go.

♪ He can't hit it

anyway! ♪

That's big Henry.

He doesn't get so many hits.

Here we go!

Lock down!

Here we go! Concentrate!

Time out!

Ooh!

Be tough out there!

You all right, son?

Advance to first base.

O.k., take

your base now.

Today is the day that we win.

Look at that crazy hair.

What you need is a good haircut.

Yeah.

It's goddamn hot here.

We ought to be out on the ocean.

Today's the kind of day

you want your worm in the water.

I like to go fishing.

Oh, no. Big Henry's

too far off base.

That's o.K.

Go on. Go ahead.

Don't worry about him.

Go back. Go back.

That's it.

Now, watch. Watch.

Back, back, back, back!

Go back!

You're out!

That's the game!

Oh.

I don't believe it.

They'll get over it.

Yee-ha!

All right! Yeah!

I thought today would be

the day for certain.

Well...

One of these days.

Heh heh.

One of these days.

You like these games, Walt.

I like baseball. Yes.

I saw the New York Yankees play

in the world series, 1958.

I came from Cuba to watch.

Yogi berra, Mickey mantle,

whitey Ford is on one team.

They are famous, even in Cuba.

I want to see them play.

They're the greatest team ever...

Yankees, 1958...

The best team.

The best.

You came before the changes?

Yeah, before.

You never went back, huh?

While I was here,

everything there

changed so fast.

I didn't know my home anymore,

so I stayed here

and wait for things

to be the same there

again, but...

Who is she, frank?

Huh?

Who?

Oh, that depends on who you ask.

My second wife

thought it was her.

My third wife thought the same.

My fourth, a redhead,

thought it was my mother.

Well, the truth is

I don't know who she was

or where she came from.

Woke up one morning,

there she was,

sort of like my first wife.

Ha ha ha!

How did you get

so many wives? How?

Aftershave?

Ha ha ha!

Hey, Walt, what time is it?

Ha ha. It is 12:00

and 40 minutes.

Oh, I'm late for a date.

I've got a...

♪ a lady friend to meet ♪

oh, well,

I have a lady friend to meet, too.

What's that smell?

That's my aftershave.

Mmm.

Do you have a date

tonight, Walter?

No, no date.

Lord.

What is that stink?

Is that you?

I'm surprised they let you on

the bus smelling like that.

I'm surprised you fit

through the doors.

Ha ha ha.

Georgia!

Aw, come on, Georgia!

Don't give me the high hat!

You live like in prison, frank.

You have no record

player or television

or even a telephone.

Just, um,

your regular trim, huh?

I don't want to look like no...

Pretty boy.

I know what I'm doing.

Stop moving so much,

or I make a mistake...

Cut off your ear.

That's what I told

little children,

and you're like them,

always moving.

I'm used to doing this myself.

Well, you don't do

such a good job.

I was a barber 50 years,

and I never heard of a man

who cuts his own hair.

Now you have a good haircut...

For at least once in your life.

Do I look, uh, respectable?

Mmm.

Maybe for you,

a haircut is not enough.

You don't even have one picture,

not one.

Even men in prison,

they have pictures.

Well, when I was in the service,

we had a saying.

All a sailor needs

is a straight back,

strong legs, and a stiff pecker,

and every port's his home.

I don't know what that means.

Uh, it means a man

can wash up anywheres,

and he can take care of hisself.

Now, stay still, frank.

I won't hurt you.

Shh shh shh.

Easy.

Yeah, yeah.

You spend a lot of time at sea?

Yeah.

When things got hot here,

you know, with...

My wife and the boy,

that's where I'd go.

Was it hard to be away

from your family?

Yeah, it was hard.

Um, not because...

Not because I was away,

but because sometimes,

I tell you...

I didn't want to go back.

I wanted to be alone,

and I got my wish.

But, god damn it...

My back is still straight,

my legs are still strong.

Mmm.

How do I look?

It's so beautiful, frank.

I wasn't married like you were.

No?

I think if I had stayed,

I would be married.

But, uh...

Here, I have to start again.

I... i had to learn English, uh...

I had to...

To make my barbershop.

Uh, before I knew it,

I was, uh...

I was an old man,

and... Ha!

You are naked, frank.

Waah!

Oh! Ho ho ho!

What are you waiting for?

Come on in.

You're swimming naked.

Sure.

You never went skinny

dipping when you were a kid?

Yes, but I wore a bathing suit.

You said we were going fishing.

I hate fishing.

I said we were going to

dip our worms in the water.

Yo ho ho ho!

Come on!

Maybe I can go in my pants.

Hey, Walt, you know

what's in this water?

Eh?

Me, a bunch of fish.

None of us are wearing pants.

Come on!

Ohh.

He smacked me on the ass.

Get out of here.

He did. I should

have known better

than to turn my back on him.

Are you nuts?

Make way! Make way!

Here's the knucklehead now.

Look at them, heckle and jeckle.

I haven't seen them

apart in a week.

I bet they sleep together.

Oh, leave them alone.

I miss them more

than I miss you.

Why can I not drive ever?

You cannot drive ever

because up front you

got to pedal and steer.

You've just learned

how to do the first part.

Is today the day

you two surprise me

and order something intelligent?

I thought about what you said.

I really did,

but I can't resist

those damn things,

so bring us our

special ingredients.

You should not swear so much

when you speak to her.

She's a nice girl.

You need a goddamn hearing aid.

I didn't say a damn thing.

You did.

You said one damn

and one goddamn.

Hmm?

If he touches my ass again,

I'll stick a fork in him.

Better get used to it.

I'll serve frank all

the bacon he can eat.

Maybe he'll drop dead.

I thought that red

would win yesterday.

They were so close.

They were doing just fine

till big Henry dropped the ball.

They will win one of these days.

Say, they don't play

tomorrow, do they?

No. It's Friday.

Good. Meet me

at the movies tomorrow.

The noon show.

Come on. I got

a surprise for you.

Ohh,

I don't want to see two movies

for the price of one anymore.

It ain't that.

It's a surprise.

I never enjoy the first one.

I'm too nervous about going

to the second one for free.

Just meet me at noon.

Don't wait outside.

Buy your ticket.

I'll meet you in the lobby.

Elaine!

Hey!

What about the goddamn bacon?

You want a ticket

for the noon show

and another for the 2:00?

Is that against the rules?

I guess not.

Here you go.

Your ticket, sir?

♪ For I'll be there

♪ puttin' down my top hat ♪

♪ mussin' up my white tie ♪

♪ dancing in my tails

how about this suit?

It's beautiful.

When did you get this job?

I applied for it last week

after the haircut.

Hey, Walt.

I need your ticket.

Oh. Sorry.

Got to do my job.

Can't get caught slacking

off the first day.

You see that redhead up front?

She thinks

I'm something special.

I'm going to pay her a visit.

Now, before you

get excited, lady,

I'm not just some jerk

sitting down beside you.

I'm doing my job.

This is one of my

responsibilities.

I've got to try out each seat.

You look real pretty

today, Georgia.

What do you think of the suit?

It's nice.

Nice?

Come on.

Take another look.

You look very handsome.

I had a shave, you know.

It's real smooth.

You want to feel my face?

I believe...

We're all alone.

Uh...

It's, uh, romantic, I think.

You just get back

onto your side.

It's like they're playing

the movie just for us.

You're a beautiful

woman, Georgia.

Listen, mister!

You're a beautiful,

beautiful woman.

That's enough!

Oh, come on, Georgia.

Georgia, Georgia.

Oh!

You're acting like a

fool, Francis!

Where's your pal?

He's working.

That lout found a job?

Yes...

'Cause I cut his hair.

Ha ha ha.

You should see him.

He has some fancy suit.

Could I get you

something to eat, Walt?

This is not Elaine's side?

Yeah, well, Elaine's not here.

Oh, she is sick?

Yeah, well, I'd say so.

She's marrying a marine.

She's getting married?

Yep.

No.

Yeah, contrary to my advice.

She's moving to pensacola,

also contrary to my advice.

Hmm.

She's working Wednesday lunch,

as a favor,

if you'd like to say goodbye.

What would you

like to eat, Walt?

Uh, I'm not so hungry.

You're not hungry?

No.

So you came into a restaurant?

Maybe you'd like a drink?

Uh...

A small juice, maybe.

♪ Tú me quieres dejar

♪ yo no quiero sufrir

♪ contigo me voy

♪ aunque me cueste morir ♪

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Walt.

Walt!

Come on in.

Good morning, frank.

What time is it?

It's 11:00.

That late, huh?

Yes.

Well, I didn't get

much sleep last night.

Remember that woman

in the movies yesterday,

the, uh, feisty one?

Yeah.

Well, she, uh,

she stopped by here

late last night

with a bottle of wine.

To apologize, she said.

So I was up most of the

night accepting her apology,

so to speak.

You just missed her.

Frank, I came to ask

if you're going

to your work today.

Yeah, 4:00.

I thought maybe I could

use your bicycle today

if you don't need it.

Oh, I don't know.

It's no easy job.

Up front, you got to steer.

What do you need it for?

How come you haven't

shaved today, hmm?

Oh, it's a pain

in the ass, Walt.

What about the bike?

I want to go buy something.

What?

Uh...

A gift for Elaine.

She's leaving.

A goodbye gift?

Yeah.

Well, I'll give you a ride.

We'll chip in and buy

her something nice.

Oh, I don't know.

Uh...

Maybe you could

give me the ride,

and I could buy her

something myself.

You've never even said

hello to a woman.

How would you know

how to say goodbye?

Saying goodbye to women

takes a touch.

I've been married

and divorced four times.

I'm an expert on the subject.

We'll go to the pier market.

I thought I would go

to 12th street

to... to the gift shop.

Oh, she surely was

something last night, Walt!

I didn't sleep a wink!

You would think

that on my last day,

you guys would order

something different

just to make me happy,

but no.

You smell nice.

I smell like bacon.

Psst.

We brought you

a going-away present.

A bottle of vodka?

What's wrong?

You don't like vodka?

No, it's very sweet,

but I don't drink.

You got to drink something.

Well, not this...

But I know plenty

of people who do, so...

One of them's sitting

right next to you.

You guys are sweethearts.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Thank you, Walter.

It's yours.

Well, how the hell did I know?

I thought everybody drank.

You said you knew

what she'd like,

and you said goddamn again.

You shouldn't speak

that way to her.

Even a sailor

can watch his mouth.

I wasn't a sailor.

I was a captain!

A captain can say

whatever they goddamn...

Leave your ugly words

for the water.

Women shouldn't hear

such things.

Don't tell me about women.

I've had four wives.

I think maybe that means

you don't know women at all.

I got news for you, pal.

Women like me.

No, women slap you in the face

because you only know

how to be rude!

I suppose you learned

a lot about women

dancing around your

apartment by yourself!

Huh?

Ha ha ha!

♪ La-la-la-la-la

♪ la-la-la-la-la-la

I saw you the other night

spinning around

your living room!

You just leave Elaine alone.

She's my friend.

You don't have a right

to buy her awful gifts

and say they're from me.

I wouldn't buy her

something so awful.

Now she thinks I'm awful, too.

Were you thinking about Elaine

when you were dancing

around in that suit?

I am only practicing.

Practicing?

I bet you've been dancing

around up there for 30 years...

Alone!

That ain't practicing!

That's fantasizing!

You're the one who fantasizes.

Number 1... you lie...

That that woman slept

with you last night.

You pretend to be

king with the women,

wearing that stupid hat!

It is a stupid hat,

only a stupid $7.00 hat!

Women think you are a clown!

Don't you touch that hat.

Don't touch that hat.

You don't touch that hat.

Come on, Walt.

Come on.

Come on,

come on, Walt.

You don't touch that hat again.

That's a gift from my son,

and it's a damn fine hat!

No, it's not.

It's a terrible gift,

like the one you bought Elaine.

It is thoughtless,

and only a terrible son

would buy that gift

for his father.

I don't have to take any more

of that shit from you!

You're... you're

worse than a woman!

You're a man without balls,

a man without balls!

And don't tell me I

got a terrible son!

Because I do,

god damn it,

I do.

But I don't need you

to tell me that!

That's life, Walt!

That's what life does to you...

But you wouldn't know that

because you've never lived one!

You've got no balls!

You just got your... your dancing

and your goddamn baseball games

and your crossword puzzles!

I had nice things to do

until you came

with your stories,

always talking,

so I can't have peace.

You never listen, only talk!

What do you know?

You've only known me two weeks.

What do I know?

Yeah!

What I know?

I know Elaine was my friend

before you came here

with your filthy mouth.

I know I could have

breakfast here,

and she'd be nice to me.

Now she won't be here anymore!

Oye, frank...

You may have a fancy job

and a spiffy jacket,

but you still are

only a dirty sailor.

A dirty sailor.

I'll see you later...

Twinkletoes!

Drive 'em in, and we win,

and you're the hero.

That's a good play, kiddo.

Come on, Henry!

Let's go!

Henry!

Come on, buddy.

No pressure, though, son.

No pressure.

Keep your eye on the ball

and listen to me.

That's it.

Remember, never lose

your composure.

Shut up and let your son bat!

What do you want, a piece of me?

No. Just leave

him alone.

It's none of your business!

What are you pushing for?

Don't push!

That was a push?

How's that for a push?

You're out of control!

I'm talking to my son!

You're out of control!

Leave me alone!

Yay!

Ohh.

Yes!

Come on, get it!

Go on! Go on!

Cut him off!

Hurry!

Yeah!

Go on!

Safe!

Moist, humid air out of...

Who is it?

Francis.

You better not be drunk.

I'm not drunk.

I've been working.

A man don't drink on the job.

He drinks after the job.

You shouldn't be coming

around here so late, Joyce,

especially in that

good-looking suit.

I don't want people talking.

They all go to sleep

before the sun sets.

Nobody's looking.

Well, it is almost midnight.

I was sleeping myself.

Sleeping? How come

I heard the television

before you came to the door?

You got good ears

for an old man.

I just want to sit down

for a little while.

And he hit that ball so hard,

I thought the bat

was broke in half.

Would you drop a

little of that in here?

He stood 6 feet tall.

It was a great sight to see.

You know, frank...

Before you came around,

I'd forgotten how much

I really like Irish whiskey.

You know,

it was a great sight to see.

Did I ever tell you

of the time I met

Ernest Hemingway?

If you're going to tell

me that story again,

fill it up to the top.

1938, Puerto Rico.

I was the youngest sea captain

in the Caribbean.

I was 20 years old, you see.

Now, Hemingway, he was older,

but he was strong.

He was a fisherman.

He just liked to congregate

with other fishermen

and sailors,

you know, what-have-you.

One night

he was as tight as a drum.

He stands up, and he shouts out

how he could whip

any man in the room,

which was a stupid thing to say.

Now, why was that, frank?

Because I was there, lady.

Ah.

And I was a sight to see.

Why, I had arms

as wide and round

as these legs.

These legs were as big

as banyan trees.

Ah, I was rough,

tougher than hell.

I was as hard as a rock.

So,

I...

I walked up to him,

and I smiled...

And I said,

"whip me.

"Go on.

Try and whip me."

'Cause I was as hard as a rock.

Oh, it was...

It was a sight to see.

Poo.

You're a beautiful woman, Helen.

You're a beautiful,

beautiful woman.

You've had a lot

to drink, frank.

And you've got great tits.

All my wives

had great tits.

Wonderful.

Pick up your clothes now.

Hey, come here, Helen.

Just let me feel your

tits press against me.

Don't walk away from me, woman!

Don't walk away from me.

You're not going to

send me up to bed

like some kid.

I came down...

To spend the night with a woman.

I can't do this anymore.

I'm sorry, Helen.

I used to pick women up

in my arms.

I could carry them upstairs.

Now I'm carrying my clothes...

Like a clown.

Helen...

Let me sleep

on your couch.

I don't want to go back

to that room tonight.

I don't want to be

up there alone.

Not tonight.

O.k.

Come here.

Excuse me, ladies.

What do you call

that activity there?

We're dancing.

Dancing?

No. No,

I'm sorry, ladies,

but...

But that ain't...

That ain't dancing.

Two of you are 3 feet apart.

One of you is moving

around without the other.

You got to have

a partner to dance.

I don't know how.

Nothing to it.

You want to learn?

It's o.K.

O.k.

Then...

First of all,

you've got to put on

some beneficial music.

Ah, that's nice.

Give me your two hands.

Now put your left foot

up on my right foot,

your right foot up on my left.

And 1, 2, 3, follow me.

You know,

you should've been

at the game, Walt.

I am ashamed I kept you away.

It was a sight to see.

I'll tell you, big Henry,

well, big Henry hit a...

He went...

He's never going to

get a hit, I guess.

They could've won it this time,

but big Henry struck out

again, I'm afraid.

You know, Walter...

I've been married

and divorced four times.

I've got a lot of enemies,

but I'm kind of short

on friends.

Let's go, girls.

It's getting late.

I'm sorry I made fun

of your hat, frank.

Yeah, well...

It's a damn fine hat.

Yes, yes.

That was a sad day.

I never even say

goodbye to Elaine.

Well, you ought to say goodbye.

But it's sunday.

The bus doesn't work today.

I... i can't get there.

Walt...

I will get you there.

Why are we stopping, frank?

I need to sit, Walt.

But Elaine is there.

You go ahead.

Oh. Alone?

No. I will wait

with you.

Walt, if you don't

move your ass,

you're going to miss her.

You can pick me up

on the way back.

Now get moving.

Come on. Come on.

Oh...

O.k.

Now, Walt,

you'll do fine.

Just keep pedaling.

O.k. O.K.

Whoa!

I am in the front, frank.

I am in the front!

Ha ha ha!

Whoa!

Keep pedaling!

♪ I love Paris

♪ in the springtime

♪ I love Paris

♪ in the fall

♪ I love Paris

♪ in the winter

♪ when it drizzles

♪ I love Paris

♪ in the summer

♪ when it sizzles

♪ I love Paris

♪ every moment

♪ of the year

♪ I love Paris...

Hello!

Walter.

Hi.

I wanted to say goodbye.

That last day in the restaurant,

I didn't want to leave,

but frank, he made me mad.

Oh, well,

yeah, he has a way about him.

He's not a bad guy.

He's just used to being

alone all the time.

How'd you find my house?

I went to the snack shop,

and they told me where you live.

See?

You look different, Elaine.

Well, I'm not in

that awful uniform.

No, it wasn't so awful.

No.

Why don't you come inside?

Oh...

I have to go back.

Well, you just got here.

How did you get here?

Frank, he let me use his bike.

You came all this way on that?

Yes.

It wasn't hard.

I'm in good shape.

Well...

You better come in for a drink

just the same.

You have many, many clothes.

So, are you still

going to the big dance?

I hear they're not

so big anymore.

No?

Who'd you ask?

Nobody yet.

I'll be right back

with your water.

I wanted to ask you

to the summer dance,

but you're moving,

so I'm going to ask someone else,

and...

I'm a very good dancer.

You're making me very sorry to

move, Walter.

That's a long way

to ride a bike.

6 miles.

You must be beat.

I can ride more miles than that!

Can I get you

a glass of fat to go with this?

This will do just fine.

Uh, uh, uh, uh.

No, you don't.

I'm sorry, Mickey.

Oh!

You're losing your touch, frank.

I barely felt that one.

Why don't you put that

crossword puzzle away?

I've never seen you fill

more than two boxes.

I do them when you are at work

at your fancy job.

Uh, I got sacked.

Too much time in the theater,

not enough in the lobby.

Oh.

You know, Walt,

that was the first job

I ever had

that was not on the water.

I was beginning to like it.

Here.

Thank you.

Mmm... mmm mmm mmm.

Well, tonight is a dance

at the oriole's lodge,

and there is a band

coming down from Jacksonville.

It has five members,

and there is, uh, dancing

and raffle

and free booze.

Would you like to come with me?

Are you asking me

on a date, Walt?

As a friend.

Will there be women there?

Yes. Old women.

I like all kinds.

Me, too.

♪ Some enchanted evening ♪

♪ you may see a stranger ♪

♪ nena, que me sucedió

♪ cuando por primera vez te vi ♪

♪ amor

good afternoon, Helen.

♪ Suela que me Alma sintió ♪

good afternoon, frank.

♪ Y esto sólo

♪ al hablarte

♪ te ofrecí

♪ ámame cualquier momento

♪ quiéreme siempre

♪ porque así quieren

las lágrimas a dios ♪

♪ yo me siento muy feliz

♪ Linda mujer

♪ y te quiero

con todo mi corazón ♪

♪ y yo cantaré

♪ y solita

tú serás la emperatriz ♪

♪ aunque no rinda

mientras viva ♪

♪ mientras viva toda

♪ toda mi pasión

Frank!

Frank, we're late!

It's after 7:00!

Frank!

Oye, frank!

We're late!

Frank, open up!

Someone's waiting.

Come on, frank.

We're going to be late, frank.

You should be dressed.

Wake up. Wake up.

Up.

Hey!

Frank, up.

Frank!

Well, he is drunk, probably.

Why should you be

drinking tonight, frank?

Hey.

Would you know who to call?

No, I...

Do you know if he had a doctor?

No, I don't know that.

Well, I have to

call someone to come.

The city will come.

Oh, no, no.

No, no, no.

He has a son.

Well, the son.

I'll have to call downstairs.

Would you wait?

I will wait. Yes.

Yes.

Oh, frank...

You should not

leave here like this.

No.

You should be dressed

like a gentleman.

A gentleman.

Goodbye, frank.

You shaved today.

Goodbye, frank.

♪ Sufro la inmensa pena

del cuento mío ♪

♪ siento El dolor profundo ♪

♪ de tu partida

♪ y lloro sin que sepa

que El llanto mío ♪

♪ tiene lágrimas negras

como mi vida ♪

♪ sufro la inmensa pena

del cuento mío ♪

♪ siento El dolor profundo

de tu partida ♪

♪ y lloro sin que sepa

El llanto mío ♪

♪ tiene lágrimas negras

como mi vida ♪

♪ tú me quieres dejar

♪ yo no quiero sufrir

♪ contigo me voy

♪ aunque me cueste morir

♪ tú me quieres dejar

♪ yo no quiero sufrir

♪ contigo me voy

♪ aunque me cueste

♪ morir

Wrestling Ernest Hemingway (1993) - full transcript