Wonderful! Liang Xi Mei the Movie (2018) - full transcript

Cross dressing as a middle aged lady for comedy is his best idea in his life and he is milking it to the last drop. The best part is that this idea is not even his own, it was blatant rip off from a Japanese comedian legend. This man has received far more credit than he deserves. And yes he is a sleeze bag that sleeps with aspiring actresses in his mini van in parking lots.

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It's really me.
Long time no see. Hello everybody.

Please applause to welcome me.
Thank you. Thank you.

Due to technical fault...
Please don't block me.

...this movie, you see,
has already become black and white.

Liang Ximei the movie
is not going to be broadcasted.

- You can head home now.
- Liang Popo, what are you doing?

Nothing, nothing.

I'm just telling them
that the movie is about to start.

Everyone please turn off your phones.

- The colour's back.
- Who is it?

Don't tell.



Actually, after turning off the phones
you still can turn it on.

While you watch the movie, let it ring,
then the movie won't be nice.

So everybody can hurry and head home.

It got my nose!

Robert, Albert.

Where are you guys?

Everyday I open my eyes

To face the life ahead of me

Don't be envious of what others have

And don't fret over the small things

A busy day starts from daybreak

Busy helping other people out

Never asking for any returns

An Auntie's life is destined to be so



Oh my... This is so vexing.

Oh my... This is so vexing.

Please excuse me.
You've only seen me on the small screen.

This is my first time on a big screen.
Doesn't it feel a bit strange?

I can understand.
But you know, humans must seek progress.

Transiting from small to big
is a good thing, isn't it?

I know many of you think that

I'm crazy, standing here
and mumbling to myself.

Actually, I'm not talking to myself.

There are many people talking to me.
They just love to listen my gossips.

I'm not lying. Here. Let me show you.

- Hi.
- Hi Ximei.

- Hi Everybody.
- Hi Ximei.

Say it with me. This is really.

So vexing.

How? Believe me now?
I am not the crazy one. You guys are.

I know many friends have seen my home.

They've seen it so many times.

But actually,
they've never seen what's inside.

Just what's on the outside.
Today, I'm in a good mood.

So I'll bring you on a tour.
Where do you want to go? My room?

So naughty.

Let me change my slippers first.
They say to understand someone.

You must take a look at their room.

You guys are the first to see my room.
Aren't you filled with awe?

Let's do this together. One, two, three.

Wow!

Wonderful! To tell the truth,

I feel like I've stripped
and exposed myself.

No, no, no.

I meant that my room's all
exposed to you guys.

We have to pamper ourselves.

I specially bought
this 6-star hotel luxury bed

so that I can feel
experience life in a palace.

I am that Queen. Let me tell you.

These represent who I am on the inside.

The spirit of a young girl
lives inside me.

I know you guys will laugh at me.
But it's ok. You always laugh at me.

Especially for this blouse.
It has been a running joke.

Many say that.
I've never washed this blouse.

Over the years,
I'm always wearing the same thing.

Actually, I have more than one.

Don't believe me?
Today, I can finally prove my case.

Let me tell you.
I can finally prove you wrong.

Are you ready?

See this?
I have so many of the same blouse.

See, you guys say it's the same.

But actually,
the patterns are all different.

For every single piece.

This pattern and that pattern.
They're different. Look.

This and this. Also different.
You guys don't know how troubled I am.

Every morning,
I ponder before all these clothes.

Which one should I wear?
Because I am afraid that whichever I pick,

people will say that it's the same.
But actually, they are all different.

You might want to know
why do I love this print so much?

Actually, there's a reason for it.

Back then, my husband saved up $300
just to buy this branded blouse for me.

After he passed away,
I missed him so much.

When I wear this blouse,

I feel like he is right next to me.
Hugging me.

You have it good.
Going off just like that.

Leaving me the responsiblities
of a household and our sons.

Thank goodness I'm thrifty and
managed to support the household.

Would have been great
if you had left me some money.

Right. This is me when I was young.

Am I pretty? Vomit?
I'm so pretty, but you guys want to vomit?

So annoying. Whatever I say is wrong.
I'll stop then.

This is my room. Are you happy?

Still not happy?
Want to see the room opposite?

What's wrong with you?
Why would you want to see that room?

Ok, since you're curious...

For ten over years,
no one knows what's inside.

Let me show you. Don't worry.
What you see now

is how it usually is. It's normal.
These four lying here.

They are all alive.
Just that they are not moving.

Even if a nuclear bomb was to go off.
They will not wake up.

This is the room of the useless Robert.

When he got married he told me.
Mother, let me stay here for a while.

After I applied for a house,
I'll move out.

I waited...
And see his children are so big now.

Strange how long
his house application took.

It's useless to say so much.
Just like this, he's here to stay.

Sometimes he doesn't even pay
for boarding costs.

Let's stop here. The house's on fire.

Fire. Fire. Fire. The house's on fire.

See, they just won't wake up.
Let's hope there'll never be a fire here.

If not, they'll all roast to death.

Please excuse me for showing you
this ugly side of our family.

Actually, in our house,

there's another place which you often see.
But never had a chance to enter. Remember?

I always rush out
from there to talk to you guys.

But you've never had a change to head in.
I'll bring you for a tour now.

This is my kitchen.
It's not different from any other kitchen.

Although it's small,
it has all the essentials.

As you know, I have two sons.
One's Robert, the other's Albert.

Look at the aprons they've given me
and you'll know how they see me.

This is from Albert.
To me, I'm sexy and...

Perfect.

Robert gave me one too. Look.
What did he give me?

I'm an old hen to him. Old hen.

If you are a mother.
Don't you think you'll be biased too?

No choice.

Whatever Albert likes,
I'll cook it for him.

He loves fried eggs.
So I'll fry them for him.

They're all up.

You two are finally got up?
Weren't you sleeping like a pig?

Granny, I couldn't sleep.
Because I had a nightmare.

Nightmare?

- What did you dream of?
- I dreamt that...

My tummy was hungry.
It's a hungry nightmare.

Ok. Eat this and you won't be hungry.

- Seriously.
- Granny.

Don't mind me asking.
You are always talking to yourself.

Are you sick?

Nonsense. Who's sick?
I'm talking to myself

to keep my mind agile.

Look at your Great-Grandpa.
Sitting there as still as a stone.

Hello? Father, father.

See, no movement. He seems really ill.

In computer terminology, this is called...
Put to sleep.

Granny, do you know.

In sleep mode, once you touch it,
it'll start moving.

But for Great-Grandpa,

no matter how I poke him,
he still doesn't move.

What then?

It's like he hang.

Hang?

Then how?

If restarting doesn't work.
You can throw him away.

Rubbish. Eat your breakfast.
Enough nonsense.

Throw away? You kids are the luckiest.

Just open your eyes.
And you'll have food and money.

Granny, why are you adults always
automatically talking about money?

Is money really that important?

Granny's not the only one.

Even the school talks about money.
This needs money, that needs money.

Everything needs money.

See, even Fatty is speaking for Granny.

You're right. Let me tell you.
This world is all about money.

You guys are still young.
You don't know the importance of money.

When you grow up, you'll understand.
Where's the coffee? I'll go get it.

- Morning Mother.
- Morning Mummy.

Good boy. You made your own sandwich.
I'll make drinks for you.

Drink this in the morning.
It's good for you.

Your father and uncle
used to love this too.

It's yummy.

Good morning Grandpa,
Mother, Sister-in-law.

Morning.

Eggs. My favourite.

Thank you Mother.

Mother, jam for you.

I asked you for $1,500 yesterday
to start an online business.

Do you have it?

Will I dare to not have it?

Let me tell you, you youngsters

should always have some savings.

Don't just blindly use credit cards.

And spend money you do not have.

When you have a job,

you should save about 10 or 20% of it.

To prepare for rainy days.

So you can support yourself
for at least 3 to 6 months.

- That is a lot safer.
- Morning.

- $1,500 for you.
- Thank you.

$1,500 all at once?

Give me $150.

What you said is unfair.

When you first stepped into society.
How many $1,500 have I given you?

- You tell me. Don't give me that.
- Yes.

Did you forget?
You jinxed your dad when you were born.

He got into a car accident.

We had to beg for money to foot the bills.

Did you forget that? Also,
when you were studying,

you actually set someone's car on fire.
We had to get money to pay them back too.

Did you forget all these?
Still dare to talk to me about money.

It's all in the past. Why bring it up?

Aren't you sick of it?

Ximei.

Canto Granny?

- What's the matter?
- This is bad.

- My grandson got kidnapped.
- Seriously?

The kidnappers asked me
to withdraw money for them.

Really?

They warned me not
to report this to the police.

I'm not to let anyone know.

What to do?

Don't be afraid.

Wait a while.

You have to help me.

Let's go to an ATM.

- To get money for them.
- Wait for me.

Hurry up.

Listen up.

If you don't get me money
by the designated timing.

I will kill your grandson. Got it?

Don't do that.

Then hurry up and get the money for me.

Ok, I'm rushing to an ATM now.
Wait wait. Don't kill him.

What to do, Ximei? I'm really scared.

Don't be scared. I'll handle this.

This bank is pretty famous recently.

We are at the ATM.

We are at the ATM. What to do next?

Let me speak to him.

Be careful.

Hello, Canto Granny is illiterate.

I only want to speak to her.

Don't panic.
I'm a really good sister of hers.

We are not bad people.
We are not outsiders.

We are very close.

She only knows how to get money
from the bank tellers.

You asked her to get money from an ATM.
It's too high tech for her.

- I'm warning you.
- Don't warn me. Let me tell you.

Isn't it faster if you come down
and teach us?

We really don't know all these technology.
Come over, ok?

Come over?

I never meet my client.

Then your service isn't that good.

Last week when that.

Supreme Court of Singapore
asked me to transfer money to that...

Special account.

I requested for them to come down too,
because we really don't know how to.

I told him too that we are not bad people.
He believed me and came down.

So we gave him the money.
And gave it to him happily. Come over.

- Really?
- Yes.

Hurry up. Don't fret over this.

I don't want.

Come over. We are so familiar already.

I don't want.

I'm running out of battery.

- Give me your address.
- Address...

It's still full but you said...

Have you seen. that bad guy before?

- How could I have? Silly.
- Then how are you going to recognise him?

It's easy.
Bad guys now are really strange.

They like to write on their faces.
I'm a bad guy.

- He's here.
- Bastard.

Just one glance
and you know he's a bad guy.

Hi.

Confirm. Confirm that he's bad.

Hi.

Is this place hard to find?
Was there a jam?

How do you know it's me?

Only people who go to court
will dress like this.

Why wrap yourself up like this
if you're not going to court?

One look and we know that you're...

Someone who does bad things.

Really?

Take it off.

Better put it back on.

What are you laughing at?

I did my teeth before.

Password.

9... 999...

94...

999...

9 what?

945.

- Who said that?
- I said that.

Canto Granny, why did you
choose to be a volunteer?

I've been down on luck recently.

And I almost got scammed recently.

Maybe I didn't do enough good deeds.

You are doing good deeds
for the sake of good karma.

Doing it with a motive, that's not good.

Look at these youngsters.

They are here to distribute the food.

But they end up taking photos
and posting them online

to boast about them doing good deeds.

Do you think their attitudes are right?

Don't put it that way.

It's understandable
to take a photo for keepsake.

By posting the photos online,

they can attract more people
to join our cause.

It's a good thing.
Look, there are people who volunteer

and doesn't take photos. Look at that guy.

He's not taking any.

That's Wang Lei.

He must have been diagnosed
with terminal illness

for him to come be a volunteer.

Ok, let's start work.

You doing all these.

Is there a motive?

- No.
- That's good.

As if.

With motive? Why didn't you tell me?

Tell me, what is it?

I wish to find a companion for myself.

I knew it, you coy old woman.

Honestly, there're many uncles here
whose companions have left them.

You have many choices.

I don't want secondhand goods.

- Then?
- I want Song Joong-Ki.

- Shameless.
- Song Joong-Ki.

I tell you.
I will buy a chicken at the market

and give to you as offering.
What Song Joong-Ki?

Get working.

Wang Lei's waving at us. Hi!

Song Joong-Ki's also secondhand now.

Start working.

Door's not locked.

It's pitch dark.

Are we at the wrong house?

Over there.

Uncle Lee.

Why is he not moving?

Is he dead?

Still alive. On the lights.

Are you alright?

How can I pass on so easily?

My family are not with me.

There's no point in living.

Don't say that.

I really want to die.

But I've no strength to even stand.

Can you help me with something?

Sure, just say it.

You two.

Carry me.

Bring me to the window and toss me down.

Uncle Lee, don't be so pessimistic.

Some families are unhappy
even when they are together.

Look at my eldest son.
He frustrates me everyday.

Robert will make it one day.

Ok, ok.

It's ok.

Actually, I wanted to starve myself too.

Starve yourself?

But you two keep bringing me food.

This is good.

It's a waste, if I don't eat.

Don't eat the chicken skin.

While he's enjoying the drumstick.

Let's clean up his house for him.

So vexing. It's like a rubbish dump here.

A clean environment is essential
for good health and mind.

And looking at his eating habits.

I think he will strike...

Strike the diabetes jackpot, not TOTO.

He might not know.

One out of nine Singaporeans has diabetes.

Strike diabetes, not TOTO.

Out of every ten Singaporeans
over the age of 60,

three of them have diabetes.

It's better to reduce intake
of food high in sugar.

I'll keep them high up
so he can't reach them.

Take a look.

Aren't these clothes beautiful?

Tired? Is it tough?

You're so useless. You're broke.

So Mother made you accompany her
for her New Year shopping.

You're her trolley.

See, Albert don't even need
to be here. Such good life.

You said you'll make it big.
When will that happen?

You better get rich soon.

It'll be soon.

Mother, are you done?
Do you want to buy the whole street back?

Your whole family is staying with me.
But I'm not taking a single cent from you.

I asked you to join me
once a year for my shopping

and you want to get
all calculative with me.

Do you know how heavy is this?
Look at my wife.

- I'll help you with it.
- No need.

Hurry up, I've many things to do.

- What do you have?
- My online business.

Hello, my name is Robert.

I'm a banker.

I'm a banker who sells power banks.

Our power banks have
gone through strict testing.

We've charged each power bank overnight.

We confirm that they won't explode.
That's why we dare to sell them.

We have a promotion now.

Buy two, get one free.
Buy three, get earpiece.

So hurry up and contact me.

Don't lose this chance.

Robert is the best.

What kind of business is that?
Please. You just talk to the computer.

Talking to yourself while selling things.

It's the same as
the roadside medicine seller.

You are just biased.

Albert's doing the same thing as me.
Why don't you scold him too?

Albert... He speaks in English.
He is of a higher class.

What's the difference?

Jack Ma made his fortune
with online business too.

Isn't he doing well now?
He has no class back then.

But not, he takes first class.

You're comparing yourself to Jack Ma?

Even if he farts now, it's fragrant.
How can you compare?

You're talking about that Jack Ma?

- Yes, is he your friend?
- No.

Jack Ma used to be a pauper too.

What paper?

Mother, let me tell you.
I'm not just doing online business.

I'm in F&B too.
Food and Beverage industry.

Good.

F&B?

When did you start that?
I don't even know.

- With who?
- My best friend.

Who's your best friend?

Lion King.

Lion King. He's your best friend?

- He's toxic. He's a bad friend.
- Why are you talking bad about my friend?

If you're not free, just go back first.

I can't go now. If I go back now.

My whole family will be sleeping
on the streets.

It's ok. I'm here.

He said his luck will be better this year.

After he cross the oceans,
he'll be immortal.

He will make it.

He'll make it?

You'll make it?

Who said that?

Who said...

Who said that? Tell me.

There are ten over almanac.

I have seen every single one.

They all have different authors.

But they all say the same thing.

- What?
- That I will make it big next year.

That's funny. You'll make it big.

Then I'm the next female president.

Why must you always hurt me?
Why must you look down on me?

- I want you to be more practical.
- It makes you uncomfortable,

that I've good fortune right?

When I make it big,
I will throw cash at you.

How dare he say such things.

Darling...

What kind of mother is she?

She even looks down on her own son.

GODS OF FORTUNE

Gods of Fortune. What gods are you?

You just know how to spin tales.

And only protect the rich.

Are you looking after the poor at all?

Excuse me.

- What?
- Where are you planning to go, Boss?

- What does it matter to you?
- Of course it matters.

You broke my stuff. You have to pay.

It fell on it's own.

Why is an adult fibbing like a child?

I saw you drop it.

- How much?
- $300.

This piece of junk is $300?

What junk? This is handmade.

- What can you do if I don't pay up?
- It's ok. I'll just call the police.

Hubby, what's wrong?

Miss, you came at the right time.

Your hubby broke my stuff
and don't intend to pay.

But it's ok.
I'm planning to call the police.

Don't call the police. I'll pay.
How much is it?

$300.

What god is this anyway?

I've never seen it before.

And it costs $300.

What a thorn in the flesh.

I'm the one who paid.
Why should you be angry?

Come on, stop looking at it.

Did she really give birth to me?

She's always looking down on me.

Her negativity is killing all my luck.

I'm starving. Cook some noodles for me.
I'm going to take a shower.

Ghost. There really is a ghost.

Robert. I'm not a ghost.

I'm many levels higher.

Then you are...

You guys sing my song every new year.

"God of Fortune at your doorsteps".

I'm already in your room.

But not only do you want to run,
you still call me a ghost?

So you're...

I'm the Fortune Goddess.

Fortune Goddess?

I've heard of the God of Fortune.

But not the Fortune Goddess.

Is there a problem with your reputation?

If that is so,

I feel that your publicity
is really lacking.

The God of Fortune is my husband.

I am his wife...

Fortune Goddess.

You're the wife of God of Fortune?

So are you in control of his finances?

What do you think?
It's the same, be it in heaven or earth.

The wife is the biggest.

You mean to say, for all these years.
We've been praying to the wrong god?

You can't really say that.

God of Fortune is the air con
in our department.

Wait a minute.

Air con? Do you mean 'icon'?

Icon.

Strictly speaking, he is our...

Delivery boy.

Delivery boy. The one making deliveries.

It's like
the foreigners' Santa Claus, right?

- Yes.
- What are you here for?

I'm here to tell you
the meaning of true fortune.

You mortals always get it wrong.

Hence we have to put in extra effort.

Wait a minute. Fortune is fortune.

What meaning is there?

Forget it. Please tell me.

When will your husband be
giving me my fortune?

You still don't understand. He's just a...

Delivery boy.

Who decides our fortune?

Those above.

Why must your deities speak
like our Government officers?

You don't explain but
just throw it to 'those above'.

Actually, this can't be
easily explain in a few words.

Lion King,
why are you coming out from my bathroom?

When I came into your room earlier
on there was no one.

So I hurried to take a bath.
Then I hurried out.

Why are you back so soon?

Lion King? What are you doing here?

You still...

Mary, you're here in time.

When I was showering,
I heard Robert talking to a woman.

- A woman?
- When was I talking to a woman?

- When were you not?
- I was speaking to the Fortune Goddess.

- Fortune Goddess? Where is she?
- There.

Who did you say, you were speaking to?

Fortune Goddess.
She left without saying a word.

She's quite rude.

Your friend should have
informed you before leaving.

It's alright.
I'll chase after her for you.

Once I get her, I'll punch her.

I'll hit her, kick her.

I'll get her back for you.

Wait for me.

He just ran out without his clothes.

That's my towel.

It's gone.

What?

Amazing.

Let's go.

Go where?

Hurry. I wonder if it's still there.

Hubby, if the Fortune Goddess is real.

Why can't I see her?

It's the same as the theory
of seeing spirits.

You must be down in luck to see a spirit.
If you're in luck, you won't see them.

It's the opposite for the God of Fortune.

Only those in luck can see them.
So I can see her but you can't.

Is that so?

Found it.

Didn't you say it appeared in our room?

- Why is it still here?
- This is a miracle.

Red cloth.

You've so many tricks up your sleeves.

Will it really work?

A few fortune tellers have told me,

that I will have luck after New Year.

Look, it's not even New Year yet.

And the Fortune Goddess is ready
to give me my fortune.

Don't worry. You've found a home.

I think you'll lose a fortune
before getting any.

- Don't talk rubbish.
- Did you put parking coupons earlier on?

- I didn't.
- I've already told you

to download Parking. sg
but you just won't listen.

So naggy. Let's go.

Good thing we found it.

Never put coupon.

Brother.

Wait.

Hey. Hello.

Thank you.

I'll treat you to coffee next time.

Thank you.

Brother, don't be so serious.
Less than ten minutes.

Also want to give summon.
Luckily we had help.

If not I'll lose money.

I didn't lose your money.

In fact, I gave you some money.

The traffic department must
be quite rich now

to employ Indians who can speak Mandarin.

- Amazing.
- I'm not an Indian.

Then what are you?

- I'm a god.
- God?

What God?

God of Pop.

Fortune Goddess. I knew you'll turn up.

Wait. Can you turn back
to your original self?

That's right.

If you want to change, can you
at least change your clothes?

Can't I choose to be in uniform?

Crazy.

This uniform will bring you
a lot of curses from the people.

Right, why did you disappear halfway?

Were you frightened off by Merlion King?

I'm a God.

How could that lowly beast frighten me?

- Yes.
- I've another case to follow up.

We are very busy.
You are not the only case we have.

When are you going to give me my fortune?

Fortune? I gave them to you already.

When?

You didn't put coupons.
If you got a fine, that would be $30.

I arranged for an idiot
to help you put a $0.60 coupon.

I saved $30.60 for you. Which also means,

that I've given you
a small fortune of $30.60.

Didn't you say that fortune
dispatchment is not up to you?

We call this kind
of small fortune, petty cash.

I can decide this.

I think your husband's possessed.

Better run.

You pick up the tissue.

Don't leave me alone.

Actually I don't mind.

You can use petty cash.

And pass them to me bit by bit.

I am ok with it and very willing.

If you want to get money,
there needs to be a reason.

Hubby...

I understand now. You're just waiting
for me to do good deeds.

Then you'll pass me my fortune right?

Because everyone has different fortunes.

How much? When? How they get it?

Nobody knows.

It doesn't mean, that you'll get returns

just from doing good deeds.

Also, don't do good deeds
just for the sake of returns.

Our system is very complicated.

You made it really complicated.

I really don't understand.

Alright, let me give you an example.
Look at that man.

Where?

That one.

It's just a short old man.
What's there to see?

Continue watching.

What's that meter on his head?

WEALTH INDEX

It looks the meter on my car dashboard.
It's empty.

Keep watching.

Don't be afraid. Take your time.

It's getting fuller.

It's full.

Thank you. You're a good person.

Kindness begets kindness. Thank you.

I understand now.

Because of his good deed,
he now has good fortune.

You guys can't leave behind

the old concept
of kindness begets kindness.

That's simple.

I just need to help two eldery
across the road everyday.

And I'll have $2,000.

After one month of work,
I can rest for one year.

That man was kind
from the bottom of his heart.

Hence he was rewarded.

If you are doing it for rewards,
it doesn't count.

You know that too?

Steady.

A good deed is a good deed.

Why be so calculative?

Are you the God or am I the God?

If you're that good, try taking my place.

Let's end here today.

I think your wife is going crazy.

Mother, I think Robert is possessed.

If not, he must have gone bonkers.

He's been talking to himself
for more than an hour.

What to do?

We are home.

So hot. I'll shower first.

- How?
- He seems alright now.

I'll continue to observe him.

I was so frightened just now.

Daddy took out all our books

and replaced them
with such a dirty statue.

Is he alright?

I don't know. I'm still observing him.

Why put such a thing there?

It's where our kids do their homework.

What's the purpose of doing homework?

To get good results.

Then get into a good university
and get a good job with good pay.

With this you guys will have a shortcut
to your happy ending.

Which is to make a lot of money.

Money is very important.

Is money really that important?

You guys are kids for a reason.

In this world, everyone lives for money.

If you don't pay your teacher,
do you think it'll work?

Or ask your principal to work for free,
will he be willing?

Don't lead them astray.

Their teacher and principal get paid,
because it's a job.

If you work, you should get paid.
If not, are you to starve yourself?

Don't listen to your father.
You must study hard

so you can make lots of money
in the future.

In the end, it's all about money.

Yes.

I bought a lot of food.
I'll bring them out first.

Seafood white beehoon.

Tuck in.

Canto Granny came over to cook this.

This is her heirloom recipe,
seafood white beehoon.

You all love this right?

Yes.

Tuck in.

I'll help myself.

Delicious.

Superb.

Just enough taste.

Yummy.

Happy Chinese New Year!

A prosperous New Year to you!

A red packet for me!

Wonderful!

I hope you'll get As for every subject.

And top the class for every exams.

Thank you, Granny.

Granny, I wish you
a prosperous New Year too.

A red packet for me!

Wonderful. For you.

I wish that the two of you.

Can get the President's Scholarship.

Good fortune to everyone.

Let's see who's the first one
to come visit us.

1, 2, 3...

...Granny Cantonese.

A prosperous New Year to you.

Red packets for us.

I will invest these for you two.
I'll double or even triple the amount,

when I win and return it to you.

Come on.

Mother.

Auntie.

Happy Chinese New Year.

My friends are here
to pay their respects to you.

You wore black
for the first day of new year.

I didn't reprimand you
for the fear of bad luck.

And now you bring a flock
of crows to visit our house?

What crows? They're my friends.

They are dressed in such dark colours.

You must know,
it's the spring festival now.

It's not the Tomb-sweeping festival.

Don't be superstitious.
Quickly give them red packets.

How dare you say I'm superstitious?

And give them red packets?

I'm embarrassed.

Your friends are shameless.

Now I don't feel like
I'm giving away red packets.

I feel like the triads are robbing me.

Mother, you're the best. I love you.

- Let's go.
- I'm pissed.

Aut...

It's ok. Continue eating.

Mother, why are you like this?

It's Chinese New Year.

Come in.

Auntie.

Happy New Year.

Lion King.

I don't want them here.
Why did you let them in?

It's Chinese New Year.

They should pay respects to their elders.

- Why are you doing this?
- Okay.

You guys are so thoughtful.

We've too many visitors.
Pardon me for being a bad host.

You can leave now. Goodbye.

You want us to leave?

Turn around and take a look.

We are...

Good fortune.

Do you want 'Good Fortune' to leave?
Fine, we'll leave.

Ok.

Good for you You leave me with no choice.

A prosperous New Year to you.

I'm not married yet.
Red packet for me please.

Definitely.

- I've not been married in a long time too.
- Dream on.

- Is this your idea?
- It's not.

- It seems like something you would do.
- No way.

He's such a brainless person.
How could he have thought of this?

I'll remember this.

Did your mother said I'm brainless?

My mother never lies.

Really?

Grandpa, Happy New Year!

Lion King.

You're Lion King?

Yes.

I've heard Robert mentioned you before.

But I've never seen you in person.

Me too. Every time I visit your house.

You're not in.

You're so good looking in real like...

Compared to Henry Thia.

That's what many others say too.

Make yourself at home.

It's really strange.

Every time you appear.

I have to disappear.

Why?

I have no idea.

Make yourself at home.

Bye.

What are you doing?

I'm in-charge here.

During the festive season,
all the deities are on leave.

But it's my busiest period,

because many will lose their fortune.

I'm here to standby.

Don't mix it up.

Robert has good fortune this year.

Don't waste your efforts.

He might have good fortune this year.

But don't you forget.

Whether he gets the fortune.

All depends on how he steps.

Fortune Goddess?

You're here.

I waited so long for you.

Is he your boyfriend? Or your husband?

Of course not. He's...

- A colleague.
- Hello.

Are you guys from
the same fortune department?

I'm so thrilled to have met one deity.

Now there's two?

I'm going to strike it big this year.

Your appearance means I can finally start.

Emperor, emperor...

Ridiculous.

Ximei, Ximei...

You must be careful.

I think I just saw
your father's father's father's father

and his mother.

- What are you talking about?
- Say what?

There're two ancient looking
people behind you.

- Where?
- Where?

This is so vexing, Canto Granny.

Can you don't spew nonsense
during this period?

Did you not sleep well?
Is that why you're seeing things?

He's smiling at me now.

Mother, is she crazy?

Don't talk rubbish. It's Chinese New year.

I know. That old woman...

Oh my! The kids are gambling too.

- Do you know?
- I know.

Our red packet money.

How to gamble when you're out of money?

I still have.

Looks like Daddy's investment failed.

I'll just open a red packet.

Today's the first day of Chinese New Year.

Do a good deed.

Don't let him lose too much.

He made his own choice.

I haven't done anything yet.

He can't control himself.

Control?

Fine, we'll leave.

- I'll get someone to control him.
- Control?

It's the festive period.

Don't get too deep into it.

Know when to stop.

Mother, I've not won back my money yet.

Go accompany your friends.

Don't make me scream
on the first day of new year.

If the mood's wrong, our luck will run.

Go play with your auntie friends.

Don't disturb us.

Then no choice.

What are you doing?

Children learning to gambling too?

Why play cards, when you've sweets to eat?

Mother, what's wrong?

What?

What's she doing?

What?

I also don't know.

You cheated.

How can you use others
to do your deed for you?

Didn't you do the same?

Do you dare to say you didn't?

I...

Fortune Goddess, Fortune Goddess.

Don't you think you picked
the wrong person?

He is of such poor character.

But you want to bless him with luck?

Is it worth it?

Fortune Goddess.

Don't be sad.

Do you know why back then.

I choose to be the God of Misfortune.

Sorry, I'm not interested. Don't tell me.

Because there's no stress.

Wimp.

You also know.

My job is to make the lives
of others miserable.

Whoever curses me
I'll make their lives worse.

So, who will dare to offend me, right?

I'm not like you deities.

You give them fortune but
have to endure their scoldings.

Look at that Robert.

He's still cursing you.

Who are you all?

We are...

Fu Lu Shou.

Aren't Fu Lu Shou males?

We're their wives.

They are here
to have a boh meeting with me.

Board meeting?

Listen carefully.

It's Boh meeting.

Not board meeting.

We are people's boh.

So we must have a boh meeting.

Anyway, we are boh of directors.

Can't you tell?

Tai tais.

Fortune Goddess.

What were you complaining about Robert?

That Robert.

Thinks that his fortune will
come from gambling.

These mortals,
all they care about is making it rich.

Isn't happiness important?

During the festive period,

they only know how
to say "have a prosperous year".

They don't have my hubby in their eyes.

I know right?
"Have a prosperous new year".

If my hubby doesn't bless them
with longevity and health,

then they will all...

Souls in heaven, money in banks.

Wives in beds of others.

How can you say such things?

Low class.

You have so much class.

You've it good.
During the New Year everyone flatters you.

Flatter me? If not me then who?

To get promotions and riches,
they have to ask me.

I can't help it that my husband's
the Minister of Finance.

Don't be so arrogant.

There's a reposting after 500 years.

My hubby might be the next Minister.

Fortune Goddess, let's go for tea.

Come on, let's go for high tea.

High tea?

I can't go now.

I'm still on duty.

Let's go.

Robert, you have such a bad attitude.

How am I to help you make it big?

Do you know
that a bad attitude can ruin everything.

Can you all don't queue over here?

How are people supposed to cross?

Is his kway teow that nice?

Don't even know
if you'll get diarrhoea from it.

I asked you two to work.

But you've cooked for yourselves instead?

Eat, eat, eat...

Sea cucumber and fish maw.

You even opened the abalone?

No no. This is called "Marketing".

What marketing?

Look, when people walk by
and see our dishes. So delicious.

They will visit us then.

Why don't you bang your head on a wall?

What are you doing?

Are you after a robber?

I hit it.

Isn't this a fly?

This is my black mole.

Sorry.

Don't come over just because you're free.
Continue fighting.

Playing with me?

It has never died before.

Are you that bored to go after a fly?

The Kway teow man is
laughing at us, do you know?

So terrible?

Hitting flies here?

Robert, you're selling so many dishes,

but there's no business.

Why not focus on selling
one dish that's delicious?

Their cooking is horrendous.

Which one do you expect me to sell?

Excuse me, do you sell
seafood white beehoon here?

Yes, yes...

See. My marketing is successful.

Let me do it.

How is it?

Delicious. Give me another 20 packets.

20 packets.

I am feeling really shiok now.

Do you want me to teach you?

Must you ask?

They say everyone have their ups and downs

It's finally my turn to strike the jackpot

I thought I would waste my time this life

But the Heavens have seen my hard work

I am feeling really shiok now

Money make their way into my bank account

Do you know how shiok I feel?

I'm suddenly everyone's idol

I am feeling really shiok now

Old and young, all will fall for me

There is no other words to describe

Robert, your good fortune starts now.

I hope you grasp onto this opportunity.

NOT LONG AFTER

Come in, come in.

I have to leave after getting groceries.
Why did you force me to come here?

Sorry.

I have to leave after getting groceries.
Why did you ask me to come here?

Look. Robert has finally made it.

Is it?

Robert's selling white powder?

No. White bee hoon?

You taught him?

Who else is there?

I knew it's you.

Break for 15 minutes.

If you can wait, then stay.
If not, please leave.

What are you two doing here?

You're awesome.

You even have interval in a hawker centre?

Do you think you're doing
a musical at the Esplanade?

It's very hot inside.
You can try it, if you don't believe me.

You can't offend the customers
if something tastes good.

They can wait for as long as it takes.

Can't wait? Then eat the kway teow.

There's no queue for kway teow.

You are too arrogant.

Honestly, I'm on a lucky strike recently.

Even if I were to stirfry shit
there will still be a huge crowd.

This piece of shit.

No, not shit. What should we do next?

How can I tell you?

What if someone overhears
my secret recipe.

Now, that my business is doing so well,
Mother might start liking me.

Is the rice noodle ready?

Boss.

How much longer must we wait? Is it done?

If you want to eat, then you must wait.
It's ok, if you don't want.

Why raise your voice?

Let me tell you.

There's no business next door.
Why don't you ask him to move?

I'll rent his stall. I need more space.

What are you trying to say?

I'm saying this for your own good.

You only sold two plates
of kway teow this morning.

And you have to pay your staff
and the rent.

You'll close sooner or later.

I only know how
to cook kway teow, nothing else.

What else do you want me to do?

Go home and ask your mother. Why ask me?

- Boss.
- It's ok. We'll talk this over.

No need to talk. I'm stating facts.

- Robert.
- You're here?

- I bought a group of friends...
- Wait.

You're being a jerk.

A jerk? I'm being considerate for you.

- Robert.
- Wait.

I have kids to raise too.

You have kids? Don't I have kids too?
Think only you have them?

I even borrowed money from loan sharks.

You borrowing money is your own business.

Wait. Didn't you see
that I'm talking to him?

Bring your friends back.
Come back on Monday.

I tell you...

What? Are you alright?

- I'm ok.
- I told you not to come.

After so long I have been waiting for him.

To disregard his elders and
return kindness with ingratitude.

Must you really do this?

Don't worry.

I won't deal with him in one go.

For this kind of arrogrant.

Hypocrite.

I will take my time with him.

Look.

He's here again.

Excuse me.

I haven't even opened my stall
and the queue's here.

I'm telling you guys
If you can wait, then wait.

If not, please leave
I will only start in another hour.

Ok.

- Lion King.
- What's up?

- Boss.
- No need to call me boss.

Queue up. One hour's wait. Queue up.

Boss, please don't misunderstand.

Can we have a moment with you?

What is this about?

We would like you
to join our organisation.

I've very high standards. Look.

There's such a long queue
before we start operation.

You can't join in just
because you want to.

Actually, we know how popular you are.
That's our reason for coming to you.

Basically, we are trying to get together
famous stalls like yours.

After repackaging
with the influence of our organisation,

we will help you get
the international grade of 1 to 3 stars.

After that we'll branch out
into franchising and make more money.

Handsome guy, pretty lady.

- Have some drinks.
- Thank you.

You're in luck.

- Why?
- I've read the newspapers.

There's a few chicken rice stallls
and Japanese ramen stalls in Singapore,

they all received
the "Mee Chilling" stars.

They had such good business after that.

- Really?
- Really.

So if you really get these stars.

You're in luck.

What do you mean?

In the future, for you guys,
I'll open this coffeeshop for 24 hours.

Thank you Boss for your support.

Don't just keep talking.
Is there anything we can refer to?

Yes, don't worry Boss.

We have a very detailed
proposal over here.

Where am I to find money to join them?

Why can't money fall from the sky?

Hubby. Am I cute?

- Cute.
- This is the latest trend in Korea.

We haven't done that in a while.

Where should I find money
for registration fee?

I'm in luck this year.

How can such a small sum
of money put me to the test?

Fortune Goddess,
can you come and tell me why?

Can you come out now?

If you're not ready for things yet.

Then take it slow, don't be in a hurry.

This kind of success is
the most down to earth.

How can I take it slow
when the opportunity is here?

Are you crazy? Trying to ruin me?

I'm your wife.

I won't harm you.

Fortune Goddess?

The two of us on the same bed.

Don't you feel strange about it?

- I'll leave then.
- No.

I'm alright if it's just for a while.

Just now my wife said we haven't
done that in a while...

Was that you or my wife?

Of course it was your wife.
I have a husband.

I am vegeterian.

Sorry.

Why not you give me four digits?

Strike the jackpot

and I'll be able to
deal with the registration fee.

You are greedy just
because it's not your money.

You might need it more in the future.

Then you will have to put in more
to pay it back, understand?

Why are you speaking so profoundly?
What many more and more?

I don't understand.

Look.

It's that short old man again?

- What?
- Continue watching.

Kindness begets kindness.

It should be for me.

- Hubby.
- Daddy.

Why did you steal the handbag?

Daddy, come back.

- What's going on?
- I gave him that $1.000 as a tip.

But because of his greed,
he can't stand the test.

So he lost his fortune.
A very big fortune.

If I go vegeterian every first and fifteen

does that means I'll have
good luck and avoid evil?

You people think,
that going vegeterian for two days

is enough to order us
to help you ward off evil?

That's not how our system works.

This way of thinking is bad.

Let me tell you.

If you want money,

there has to be a legitimate reason.

For example?

For example, go learn some
new skills or new technology.

Think of creative ways to
improve and expand your business.

Understand?

I want to join
the International Food Organisation.

This is a form of upgrade too.

And it's an excellent upgrade.

If successful, I will be invincible.
Do you get it?

I've said all I can.

What I didn't say, I can't reveal too.

Look out for yourself.

Am I cute?

This is my second time asking you.
Am I cute?

My son did some research online.
This organisation is real.

Really? That's great.

Call all your friends now.

Ask them out so we can tell them
more about this investment.

- Ok?
- Ok, bye.

Everyone, take a look.

My stall is opening only two hours later

and there's such a long queue already.

This shows that my business has
a lot of unleashed potential.

We will be joining an
International Food Organisation.

Total investment of 3 million dollars.

It's up to you to decide
how much you wish to put in.

Do you think I'm an idiot?

3 million?

In my experience,
this kind of investment cost.

Should just be a few grand.
Why is it so high?

We've been friends for so long.
Do you not trust me?

Then it'll be hard
for us to work together.

It's ok. Let's just be friends.

You can bring it overseas too.

Hubby. It's Mother.

I told you to keep it a secret.
Why did you tell her?

I didn't! Do you think I'll dare to do so?

- Then how did she know?
- I told her.

Don't scold her.

I'm the one, who brought your mother.

She's your mother.

You doing a business is such
a important thing.

We must let her know.

I told you not to be a busybody.

I didn't want her to be involved.

I know. You've never wanted me
to be involved in your life.

Honestly, I've seen
how good your business is.

I just want to remind you,
you better do it by the book.

Follow every single rule.

Be more down to earth.

You are taking such a huge risk now.
I'm honestly quite worried for you.

It's alright if you don't listen to me.

There are people helping me
expand my business.

I know that you are jealous
and unhappy about it.

- Auntie, can you let me say something?
- No.

- Even if it's no, I'm still talking.
- I don't listen.

I'm still going to talk.

- I'm not listening.
- All along.

You've looked down on Robert.

You looked down on me too.

- Did I?
- Yes, you did.

You said that I led Robert astray.

But he was the one who led me astray.

- Really?
- Yes, and he led astray my son too.

He forced us to cut the same hairstyles.

Stop talking rubbish. I didn't
force you to cut this hairstyle.

You did. When didn't you?

Now that our business are doing well.

- We are all a family.
- Thank you.

You want to join us? Sure.

It's not that you can't.

Our investment amount is...

8 million.

It's 5 million.
Do you have any thoughts on that?

We'll let you have fifty percent.
That's 2.5 million.

Robert, Lion King. Goodbye.

Why did you say it's 5 million?

I ask you.
Do you want your mother to join us?

- Of course not.
- So I raised the price.

See, she's so scared.

She ran off with her tail
between her legs.

Right, you're the best.

Why are you buying TOTO today?

Fortune Goddess came
to my house yesterday.

She gave me a lengthy lecture.

Tell me to have more of this.
More of that.

I think she's hinting me to buy more TOTO,

so she can give me a fortune.

If you strike the jackpot,

our registration fee will be settled.

I thought so too.

So, you were the one
who told him to bet more.

I didn't mean it that way.

Why must the mortals
always twist my words?

They put words in my mouth.

No wonder the world is in such a mess.

I'm grateful to you,
because I can start work now.

I can't be bothered with you.

There are many waiting for me.

Excuse me.

3050.

I'm already married. With two kids.

3050.

3050. Buy a bit of it.

Just a bit.

I know. 200 big. 300 small.

I told to you get just a bit.
Why are you betting so much?

You must know.
To bet big or small, it's all betting.

If Fortune Goddess wants to give me money
and I only placed a small bet,

how is she going to give me
a lot of money? Right?

Robert, how am I supposed to help you?

Don't be afraid.

I'm not a ghost.

I'm a deity.

Fortune Goddess.

Don't lie to me. I watched period dramas.

The God of Fortune is a male.
You're female.

And you're hiding inside
the mirror. Don't lie to me.

The God of Fortune is my husband.

I'm his wife, the Fortune Goddess.

I need to speak to you about Robert.

- Robert? What's wrong with him?
- He...

No, no... It's the middle of the night.

You're hiding in the mirror.

And you really look like a ghost.

I cannot hear anything
you're saying. Sorry.

You said, that I look like a ghost?

I am very upset.

Sorry, sorry...

Alright.

I'll change into someone you
like to speak to you.

Can you?

Sure.

Who do you want?

Song Joong-Ki.

Song Joong-Ki? Sure.

Hubby.

Long time no see. How are you?

Hubby, come out quickly.

Ximei, I'm doing well.

Due to time constraint,

I want to speak to you about Robert.

We've not met in such a long time.

Why speak about him?

Come out. Let me hug you.

You must remind Robert.

Not to be greedy.

Also, both of them are our sons.

You must not be biased, understand?

Alright, I'm leaving.

I haven't hug you yet. Don't leave.

Hubby, please hug me.

I dreamt of my husband last night.
But he's gone in the morning.

I'm left with a heavy heart.

Just like now.

- Why is it so heavy.
- Don't you think you're heavy?

How can I shop with you there?
So annoying.

I'm sorry. It's your turn now.

Don't want. Childish.
How old are you already?

I need to shop for groceries. Annoying.

I feel like you really hate Robert.

I feel like you really like Robert.

Is he really your son?

No. He's your son.

How am I involved?

This is Robert's last chance.

You must help him.

I'm helping him too.

You're helping him?

You... Damn this Robert.

How dare you cheat her of her money?

How can it be so?

How much did you give him?

8...

80?

800? As much as $800?

-$8,000
-$8.000? You silly woman.

So exasperating! How can you
give him so much money?

You won't help him. So I have to.

How can I help him?

Do you know how much it costs?

You could sell your flat,

since you've finished paying for it.

Then where will I stay?

Let me remind you again.

So listen really carefully.

I've discussed with the owner

to let us stay for another six months.

If you can't settle your work
within six months,

we'll all be sleeping
on the streets six months later.

- Do you hear me?
- Mother, be at ease.

I've already checked out
a new apartment with Mary.

Once I've earned money.

We'll purchase that apartment.

Six months?

In 6 months, I'll be able
to buy 2 to 3 apartments.

Good for you.

And, when are you going to return
Canto Granny her money?

No hurry, no hurry.

She said no hurry.
I don't need to pay her back.

You dare?

She's not in a hurry but I am.

I don't like to own people money.

Listen up,
I don't like to own people money.

Please don't think that I'm like Wang Lei.

Hello honey? Where are you?

Lunch? Wait for me.

Mother, I'm going to have lunch
with my wife.

Go back on your own.

Wait for me to foot the bill.

Damn him. Changing once he gets the money.

Take a look.

I've got the super power.

No one can escape my evil clutches

You don't know the rules
but still want to play

No one can escape my evil clutches

You have foolishly fell into my pit

I won't let anyone escape from my clutches

You have given me a chance to run the gam

I will slowly get into it

Now I'll sing and dance to express my joy

Thank you for opening up and letting me in

Don't worry

I definitely won't let you down

Let us become buddies, the best of pals

Let me lead the way

The way to your paradise

Strange. The coffee is sweet
even without sugar.

Hubby.

My friend recommended this
interior design company.

I feel that it's time
we renovate our house.

Renovate?

I'll buy a new house for you.

- Really?
- Yes.

But even a new house will need renovation.

We'll renovate the new house
to look like a showflat ok?

We'll go with your plans.
I'll foot the bills.

Hubby, you've really made it this time.

The police have received reports
from many local F&B owners.

I should have made it long ago.

The owners claimed that an
International Food Organisation

have swindled them of fees
from hundred thousand to 1 million.

According to the police's latest findings

the organisation will first
send out a couple

aged between 25 to 35.

This couple will use
some methods to gain trust

and cheat victims of their fortune.

The police urged other victims
to report to them

and assist the police
with their investigation.

Fortune Goddess, come out now.

You bastard.

You went back on your words.

Say one thing, but do another.

You said that you'll bless me?

This is such a huge scam.

You can't possibly not know.

You said so much to make me happy,
but caused me so much problems.

If you don't come out now,
trust me, I'll smash...

Be careful.

Don't scold the gods.

They really exist.

I've seen them before.

Fortune Goddess, I beg your mercy.

Please don't take him seriously.

It's better to forgive and forget.

If she really is a god,

she should appear to help me.

She didn't come out to help me.
What god is she?

She's a demon.

Do you know?

The other day, she told me to bet on 3050.

I bet 200 big, 300 small.

And what did I get?

Winning numbers 3051, 3052.

And there's 3053.

All these numbers but no 3050.

What kind of god is she?

Actually, we can't blame you for this.

Mother has never tried to understand you.

I've always look down on you too.
And thought that you were useless.

You're actually very talented.

Why are you so tired?

It just happened to be so these few days.

My shoulders are really stiff. So tired.

Go home and rest.

It's ok.

You went gambling again right?

Did you lose more money?

Just a bit.

Actually it's weird.

I went online gambling yesterday.

Mother saw but didn't lecture me.

She said, that I'm a gambling talent.

She encouraged me.
Don't you think it's funny?

Your mother encouraged you to gamble?

So are you going to gamble till
you lose your life over this?

My mother has never done such things.

Suddenly, I feel this warmth in my heart.

Her doing the same things with me.
I've never felt this way before.

I think my mother is mad.

You were controlled last night.

Remember, as long as you're determined

and don't let the demon in.
He won't be able to enter.

If he knocks,
you better don't open the door.

I can't elaborate too much,

but you should understand.

Crazy.

I've a mind of my own.

Can how I be controlled so easily?

You've said too much.

You're destroying me.

He opened his own door.

I have no reason not to enter.

You... You're too much.

Really.

I'm going to start work now.

Why did you hit my dad?

What?

A fight.

Stop fighting.

Are you alright?

Lion King.

There's no one left.

Look.

How pitiful your Robert is.

I hate you.

Showoff.

I learnt this when I was three years old.

Watch this.

So hard?

I really don't know how.

Father usually pray like this too.

Will it really work?

But, she's in charge of finances.

That's not really what we're looking for.

Daddy threw her down

and she remained intact.

There must be magic involved.

She definitely can help us.

That's true.

Let's just pray.

If we get it, we have it.
If not, then forget it.

No loss.

Then I'll start.

Fortune Goddess, Fortune Goddess.

Although our wishes have nothing
to do with you,

we still hope to get your blessings

so we can answer every single
questions on the exams tomorrow.

We are doing this as
we really have no choice.

My daddy said.

Only with good results,
can you enter a good university.

Only in a good university,
can you get a good job.

With a good job,
we can earn a lot of money.

We didn't do well on our exams previously,

so we really have no choice.

Please help us.

Help us please.

You poor kids.
Forced to such extremes by the adults.

I'll hand back the exam papers now.

Ximei.

Is there really no other way?

It's all your fault.

You told me to sell my house.

I'll be homeless in a few months.

Don't worry.

You'll cross the bridge
when you get to it.

I'm just afraid
that before I reached the bridge,

my boat would have already sank.

Don't talk nonsense.

We do good deeds.

The heavens will look after us.

I'm telling you. It's not $40.

It's 400 thousand dollars.
Where am I going to find the money?

Uncle Lee, I forgot to pass you this.

Look, I added this steamed fish for you.

And I added some brown rice too.

These two are healthy food.

Isn't healthy food more expensive?

That's not necessary.

It depends on how you cook it
and what you order.

If not, it's usually alright.

Also,

I might not have time
to visit you anymore.

I've some financial problems at home.

So I'll need to find a job,

if not, we really have
to sleep on the streets.

Please take care.

Let's go.

What to do?

Our tuition teacher wants
to see the papers tomorrow.

We don't even dare to show it to mummy.

How can we show it to our tutors?

Yes and we still need
to get mummy's signature.

It's all Fortune Goddess' fault.

I thought we'll be blessed
because we prayed.

Then we can be top in class
without studying.

We were done in by evil this time.

We're going to get such
a scolding when we get back.

Maybe

we'll die without a burial place.

For sure.

Adults keep saying, that

you can't get a good job,
if your results are bad.

If you can't find a good job,
you won't have money.

Oh, no...

Our phones and ipads will be confiscated.

I feel so sorry towards them.

You mean, towards Daddy and Mummy?

No.

I meant I'm sorry to my handphone
and ipad.

Ridiculous.

Can you not joke at a time like this?

I'm serious.

I can't even protect them.

I'm such a disgrace.

Money, money. You only know
to talk to me about money.

Don't you know that my stall is closed?

I'm working as a school cleaner now.

Once I've no money,
you'll run back to your parents' place?

And you took my son too.

Another money-related problem.

Can we do that?

Can. Come on.

Uncle, you have no money. We can help you.

- How are you going to help me?
- You must kidnap us.

Kidnap you two?

Eat something.

I'm feeling so bad now.
How can I eat anything?

- Hello.
- Listen carefully.

Now my children... No, no..

Your two children are in my hands.

If you want them to stay alive,
you better prepare 10 thousand dollars.

Xin Hui and Fatty got kidnapped.

Kidnapped?

Don't be scared.

Why not?

I have experience with this.
Come, let me speak to them.

Hello.

How do we know if this is a scam?

Is your children one male and one female?

Children can only be male or female.

Is one of them fat and one of them skinny?

Children can only be either fat or skinny.

I don't care, if you want them alive,
you better prepare the 10 thousand.

I will call again to let you know
the location for transaction.

And don't you dare call the police.

If you call the police, I'll... Kill them.

Don't be afraid.

I'm here for you.

According to the Internet,

it's best not to say too much
in the first phone call.

Just say a few words and hang up.

So that their minds will run wild.

And they will be afraid.

When you follow up with the next call,
they'll be sure to agree to anything.

Because they're already filled with fear.

I know. This is called...

Psy... Psy...

Psychology.

It's a study of the human mind.

You're quite smart.
You seemed to know everything.

I learnt it on the Internet.

But, I'm a bit worried.

Worried about?

I'm worried,

because Daddy has no money now.

Do you think he'll just give up on us?

Surely he won't be so heartless?

- Are they really there now?
- Yes. What's up?

- Confirm?
- Confirm.

Mother said they're both
at the tuition centre.

Really at the tuition centre?

Should be true,
since they've confirmed it.

We're safe then.

- Honey, you're back.
- What's up?

- Where are the kids?
- At the tutor's.

- Confirm?
- Yes.

Do you not know
when they have their tuition?

- Seriously.
- It's alright now.

Hello?

Are you ready with the money?

Money? We're ready.

We're ready
for you to give us 10 thousand.

What are you saying?

Say what? Let me tell you.

I'll treat it as I'm selling
the two kids to you.

So give me 10 thousand dollars.

They are your kids.
Do you know there're two of them?

I don't care how many there are.

Asking me to come up
with money for the kids?

Are you crazy?

Kill them if you want to.

I'd rather use the 10 thousand
to buy TOTO.

Money is very important to me.

Robert, you're really good.

Your words are more vicious than mine.
They're bound to be shocked.

There're a lot of fake kidnappings now.
It's a good thing we're experienced.

I guessed it.

Money, is really more important than us.

I can't imagine
that our father is such a man.

We should have called Granny instead.

It's useless to call her,

because she is the same as her son.

They only talk about money all day long.

Stop crying.

Maybe your daddy don't mean it?

Is he your daddy or my daddy?

I definitely know him better.

He doesn't want us already.

Why do you still call him daddy?

Then what should I call him?

Call him that damn Robert.

Damn Robert?

Won't it be confusing?

There are many people
out there called Robert.

Then... Let's call him.

That damn Robert who cook white beehoon.

What?

Your daddy is...

The Robert who cook white beehoon?

Robert of 'Steady White Beehoon'?

Yes.

Now it really looks
like we're being kidnapped.

Right. It's very realistic.

You tied it too tightly,
I feel like I can't breathe.

Yes, Even when I'm itchy,
I can't scratch myself.

My buttocks itch.
Can you scratch it for me?

Go to hell.

They're calling again.

Hello.

Listen carefully.

If you want your kids to be safe.

You better prepare 50 thousand dollars.
Price increased.

You're really funny.

I didn't believe you
when you said 10 thousand.

I told you to kill them.

You still dare to call
and ask for 50 thousand?

Why not? You just kill them.

Kill them five times.

Daddy, help. Daddy, I can't breathe.

The voices are really similar.

The scammers are really professional now.

They're such pests.

Help, he's going to hit me.

He's going to hit me.

Hurry up and get Fortune Goddess over.

Fortune Goddess?

How would the kids know
about Fortune Goddess?

You damn Robert who cooks white beehoon.

You better prepare the 50 thousand.

I'll call you again

to tell you the location
for the transaction.

- Is this for real?
- Maybe it's real.

You better make a call
to the tuition centre.

Hurry up.

So it's not a scam?

If it's real, I won't know what to do.

Your acting now
is getting really realistic.

We are very frightened now.

Who say I'm acting?

Do you know why
I'm in such a pitiful state?

Who caused this?

It's all your daddy's fault.

Our daddy?

His business is good.

So he stole all my customers

and forced me out of the coffeeshop.

He caused me
to lose my kway teow business.

And I owe the loan sharks so much money.

To get 50 thousand from him,
is it too much to ask for?

You adults...

In every conversation

you have to talk about money. Why?

Because money is important.

I worked so hard frying kway teow,
but I don't have much money.

Some people
just stay at home doing nothing

and money falls from the heavens for them.

Do you think it's fair?

I know what you mean.

It's like in school.

There are classmates who don't revise

and they still get full marks.

I studied so hard but still fail.

It's unfair.

Yes, that's the concept.

Now that we've failed our exams,

we definitely won't get
into a good school,

so we can't earn big money next time.

- We are useless already.
- Yes.

You saw it too.

Even our Daddy don't want us.

Do you think I'll let your Daddy off
just because you said these?

I deserve to get
that 50 thousand from him.

- Uncle, please let us off.
- Please let us off.

You doing such a bad thing.
If your family knows

they will be upset.

Very upset.

I believe that to you.

Family is more important than money.
Right?

Boss?

Kway Teow King, I can't find you.
Where are you?

I'm in JB.

You're in JB? What are you doing in JB?

I went there to borrow money.

You know what? I've borrowed all the money
available in Singapore.

And I have to return you the money right?

I'm touched. You're so thoughtful.

Don't say that. But Boss.

I must tell you.
I'm in a very dangerous place now.

The signal might break off any moment.

Is that so? Then you better be careful.

I will. But, but...

Hello, hello, Boss?

Call you? Am I crazy?

Get up.

Get up.

I'm really looking
for money to pay you back.

We can prove that.

He's really looking for money.

Shut up when the adults are talking.

It's ok. It's ok.

Fatty, speak.

He's looking for money?

From where? From who?

From my daddy.

But my daddy won't give the money.

Because even when we're kidnapped.

He's not willing to spend money on us.

Such high level. You've learnt kidnapping?

Not me. They asked me to kidnap them.

Yes.

Look, they said so too.

Do you think I'll believe
the words of children?

- Woud I dare to lie to you?
- You better tell me honestly.

Why did you kidnap the two of them? Why?

Hurry up and speak.

I can't help you now.

Their family's in a mess now.

I was thinking.

If I just give them a shock,
it'll be easy to get money.

- Easy to get money?
- Yes.

- Really?
- Yes.

What does his father do?

He's a businessman.

Businessman?

My father's not a businessman.

He's the boss of 'Steady White Beehoon'.

Seafood white beehoon.

- It's quite nice.
- Long queues.

Rich second generation.

Kway Teow King. You have good taste.

Kidnapping the rich second generation?

How much did you ask for?

50 thousand.

Why are you so modest?

I only owe you 50 thousand.

So I'm getting 50 thousand
to pay you back.

Hundred thousand dollars?

Where am I to find
hundred thousand dollars?

No hundred thousand dollars?

Daddy.

Don't hit them.

Help, he's going to hit me.

Hundred thousand.
Hundred thousand. I'll give it to you.

So easy.

Crazy.

Asking us for so much money?
They must have made a mistake.

What mistake?

Do they think we print money?

Father, how can you still joke about this?

Wait. Actually, Grandpa
might be on to something.

With the high technology these days.

It's not difficult
to print realistic looking cash.

If they took the cash
and realised it's fake, then how?

No choice but to take a gamble now.

I think it should be alright.

In these situations,
they should be quite nervous.

They should run off
once they have the money.

I don't think they'll check in detail.

I still think it's inappropriate.

Do you have any other methods then?

No.

Hurry up.

Speed up a bit.

Time's almost up.

Is it enough? Better count the money.

We're rich.

One million dollars.

My big fortune this year
is to print money for myself.

Forget it. It's more important
to save the kids now.

Shut up. It's none of your business.

Your brother is helping you.
How can you return his kindness this way?

Why raise your voice at him?

What's the meaing of this?
Apologise to him now.

Apologise?

Whatever I do is wrong. Why apologise?

My kids got kidnapped.

I deserved it. It's karma.

Are you happy now?

Why are you saying such things?
Canto Granny, look at him.

I think you two need to get to
the root of the problem.

This afternoon at three thirty.

Get someone to bring the money
to Pei Qin Primary.

Only one person.

Any more than one

and be prepared to receive their corpses.

Don't do that.

Brother is so rash.

- I think it'll be better if I go.
- Right.

They are my children.
Mind your own business.

You can stay home and flatter mother.

How can you say that?

Don't make things worse.

Make things worse?
Alright, enough nonsense.

I'll go. I'll go. Ok?

They're my children. Why should you go?

They're my grandkids. Can I not go?

Why must you make this so complicated?

- Come over here.
- Why?

- I need to speak to you.
- Don't pull me.

- What?
- He's so rash.

What?

You want to go right?

Then you go.

- Come.
- Why?

You're really good.

What did you tell Robert?
He actually agreed to it.

I told him.

It's better to let a woman go for this.

Because it's easier
for women to settle things.

If anything were to happen, her body...

There's still something she can give them.

Robert don't have it.

What thing?

That...

Indecent... Pervert...

I meant motherly love.

Auntie!

Motherly love?
I know what you're talking about?

I'll remember this.
Settle with you when this is over.

I told you it's motherly love.

Why am I in pants?

No choice. In case of trouble.

At least I can make a quick getaway.
I won't flash myself too.

Actually, I have eight pairs of pants on.

Even if they want to do anything to me,

by the time they take off the
sixth pair, they'll sure to lose it.

No choice.
I have to learn to protect myself.

Goodness. The school is huge.
Where am I going to find them?

They made it so secretive.

Is it to hide
that they have no experience?

So annoying. Where are they?

How to find them?

Auntie!

Did you bring the money?

I brought it.

Where are they?

- Hand me the money first.
- Hand them over first.

- Money first.
- People first.

- Money first.
- People first.

- Then I'll give you their left hand.
- Followed by their right hand.

Ok, don't do it that way.

Don't play cheat.

Take your time. Are they upstairs?

I'll go find them.

Don't go.

It's fake.

Looks quite real. The printer is new.

Can you tell?

Granny.

- Hurry up.
- Are you two alright?

Boss, it's fake.

Fake?

You're quite bold.

Do you think we're dead?

Granny, we're real people.

Why did you bring fake money to rescue us?

Can't you all part with real money?

No. We really really don't have money.

Your granny's lying to you.

She's not broke.

She just can't bear to give it up.

She don't think you guys are important.

Young man, you watch your words.

These two kids are our treasure.

I will sacrifice my life for them.

Now that I'm here.

They can go.

You can do anything to me. I'm alright.

Boss, please.

Go to hell!

Call me only if it's a pretty girl.

She's an old hen.

What old hen?

Sorry, not old hen.

She's an old goose.

Go in or I'll punch you.

Squat down.

Are you two alright?

Albert, Robert, why are you guys here?

Didn't we agree that I'm the one to come?

How can we let you do this one your own?

Shut up.

You old goose.
How dare you bring two people along.

It's a good thing I'm alert.

Kway Teow King, why are you here?

I'm the school cleaner.

You're quite unlucky too.

What is this? School gathering?

There's more of them.
It's getting complicated.

- Stop!
- Don't hit them.

What did I tell you over the phone?

If there's more than one person,
be prepared to collect their corpses.

You think I'm joking?

- No!
- No!

Don't hit them.

Kway Teow King.

You told me things are
complicated with their household.

Just scare them
and we can leave with the money.

The whole situation is so complicated now.

You made all my brothers

turned from loan sharks into kidnappers.

Brother, this is called upgrading.

- It's good.
- Shut up!

You bastard, Kway Teow King,

you told them to kidnap my kids?

No. Your kids told me to kidnap them.

- Isn't that right?
- Yes.

- See, they said so too.
- Then it wasn't.

They said no.

- You guys told me to.
- Yes.

- Look.
- But it wasn't us after that.

He said no.

So is it yes or no?

Squat down.

You guys are very noisy.

What to do? Will they call the police?

Brother. Do you know?

In Singapore,
kidnapping is punishable by death.

Who's your brother?

Death penalty.

Get charcoal.

I have to ask this.

Is it really necessary
for you guys to do this?

Kill us? We have six lives here.

If you don't die, we die.

Death penalty for kidnaping.

Did you put yourself in our shoes?

My initial idea was very simple.

I just want to take the money and go.

But you.

You didn't follow the rules.

I've already told you over the phone.

Over one person

and I'll kill them.

You actually brought two people over?

Am I wrong?

You're not wrong. It's my fault.

Can you just kill me?
Let the rest of them go.

It's my fault.

No, I came up with all these.

- Kill me.
- Right.

Kill me!

Don't argue.

I'm the oldest here.
I don't have much time left.

Let all of them go and kill me.

Kill me!

Shut up!

This whole thing is my idea.

Kill me!

Fatty, what are you saying?

Good.

You all want to fight for death.

No hurry.

Look, I've already seal the windows.

Just give me a fire.

Then you all can.
Leave this world, hand in hand.

- Swiftly and painlessly.
- Without side effects.

Are you all ready?

- No.
- Wait a while.

Young man. Since we're going to die.

Before I die, can I ask you a question?

Why must you trouble people
even on your deathbed?

Aren't you annoying?

The few of you. All young men.

Why must you become hooligans?

Why walk up this path of no return?

She's talking to you.
Why walk this path of no return?

Talking about you.

You guys are so young.
Why do such a thing?

Won't your parents be disappointed?

Don't talk to me about my parents.

They're dead.

I have no parents.

I'm an orphan. What are parents?

- Enough. Light it up.
- No.

I beg you. No.

If I'm your parents, I'll be so upset.

Do not mention my parents.

Your parents put in
so much efforts to raise you...

Don't talk about my parents,
can't you hear me?

I want you guys to talk about it.
Say it out. You guys don't need to suffer.

Auntie, do you know
how much pain we are in?

I know. Because I'm a mother.

So I know.

You know?

When I was born,

my father happened to be
in a car accident.

He was in the hospital
for nine months and couldn't work.

My mother told me.

I'm a jinx.

I bring bad luck to the family.

When my brother was born,

she only dotes on my brother.

I was treated as a burden.

I've no more questions.
You guys can light the fire now.

I'm not done yet.

If he wants to speak, let him speak.

If you stop someone from speaking,

it's very rude.

Since young, my mother was biased.

I'm in the wrong, no matter what I do.

I can never catch up to my brother,

no matter how hard I work.

Even a fart by my brother is fragrant.

So we are here today,

because your fart is
smellier than your brother's?

So you're unhappy?

They are not comparing
whose fart smell nicer.

He just don't want to
lose out to his brother.

So you work harder in your studies

to let your mother see
the good in you right?

So that she will dote on you,
like how she treats your younger brother.

But it never happened.

Yes. Not even once.

When you come out into society.
You don't want to give up.

You decide to prove your worth once more.

You think of ways to earn money.

And you mean to earn a lot of money.

Because a person's worth is determined

by how much money they can earn.

And how high they can climb.

Isn't that right?

To prove to my mother.

I will not lose to my brother.

As long as I can earn money.

Whether it's legal or illegal.

I will still work hard on it.

But there are consequences
for your bad deeds.

Do you think I don't know?

Are you his younger brother?

- Yes.
- No.

Other than my mother, the person
I hate most is my younger brother.

- Brother.
- Daddy.

Isn't it funny?

The mother protected the younger
brother but not the elder one.

She's obviously biased right?

Don't spew rubbsih.
I dote on both of them.

I'm not biased. Rubbish.

Still want to weasel your way out?

Don't hit my mother.

Actually I have no objections
to you hitting her.

But before you kill her,
I would like to know.

Have you ever doted on me?

Have you ever loved me?

- Of course.
- You never.

Shortly after I was born,
Father was in a car accident.

He broke his leg
and laid there for nine months.

I know that you had
to support the family alone.

I know it's tough for you.

But when Albert was born.

What did you treat me as?

You gave all your love to him.

Did you have any left for me?

So you're the same as my mother.

Enough!

Did you know?

How naughty you were when you were young?

Your younger brother's teachers
would ask me to school.

For award ceremories and presentations.

When your teachers call me to school,

it's because you hit the students,
if not the teacher.

And once.

You even set the principal's car on fire.
Do you remember?

Do you know why I hit them?

Do you know why
I burnt the principal's car?

You don't know. You never knew.

I'm sure you don't know.

Where is this?

This is my secondary school.

That's you in secondary one.

Yes.

Why are you cleaning that?

Are you afraid that people will know?

That your mother is a bargirl.

Why are you afraid?

Do you guys know?

Robert's mother is working in that.

Papaya garden.

She sleep with people to earn a living.

Ridiculous. I was just a cleaner.

What bargirl? Rubbish!

I think he's not
his mother's biological son.

Now, do you know why I fought with them?

Look at your son.
One person bullying four people.

This is so vexing. One against four?

He dealt such heavy blows. Take a look.

Look how badly you've injured them.

Principal,
please see how to go about this.

One of them is a Minister's son.

It's hard for me to explain.

Ask your son. Why did he start the fight?

It's wrong to fight.

Sorry.

I've failed to discipline him.

I'm really sorry.

Hurry up and apologise.

I'm sorry.

Fine. I'll give you one last chance.

If you dare to touch them one more time,

we'll expel you immediately.

It's alright now.

It's ok.

You are lucky to have met me.

I, the principal,
will take good care of you.

Let me tell you,
any problems with your son come to me.

I'll help you settle it.

Principal, I'm sorry.

Forget it. Leave.

Mother.

Do you know why I burnt his car?

Because of this incident.

You were expelled because of this.

Many schools refused to take you too.

Maybe you didn't know
but I went around several schools.

You were only 13 then.

The principal had no proof

that you burnt his car.

He expelled you to vent his frustration.

The principal molested

another student's mother after that.

He was discovered and fired.

What goes around comes around.

The victim's husband

beat up the principal and
left his lower body paralysed.

This is called karma.

Robert.

I've let you down.

I didn't know that.
I've done so many horrible things to you.

You were in pain.

But I didn't know.

I really deserve to die.

Mother.
As long as we understand each other now.

It's alright.

Thank you.

Young man.

I must really thank you.

For giving us such an opportunity.

So that we, mother and son,
can finally communicate.

I really thank you.

Thank you very much.

The words we've kept in our hearts.

We've finally got them out.

We feel so much better now.

Also for me.

I would like to apologise
to you on behalf of your mother.

There are many parents,
who are not experts.

The decisions they make
might not be the right one.

But the most important thing is that
there shouldn't be hate.

There needs to be more understanding.

If we can learn how to forgive others,

then we can spare ourselves.

If you feel that those mistakes

are caused by your mother,

then don't take those mistakes

upon yourself.

Why must you punish yourself?

You can have a better life.

An even more wonderful life.

All these are your own choices.

Do you understand?

Alright, Auntie.

If we let you off here,
will you let us off too?

What do you mean?

You must not call the police.

Give us a chance to start anew.

Of course.

- No worries.
- Can.

We are supposed to help each other

to create a better world. Right?

Alright, you have my word.

Release them.

Never in my dreams did I imagine
that Robert, the young men and I

will have this chance

to vent all the frustations and hurt

in our hearts.

Everyone's grudges seem
to have suddenly vanished.

I don't know if this is a treatment
or a miracle.

- Granny! Daddy!
- It's alright now.

I would like to apologise to you.

I hope you will be gracious.

Would you please forgive me?

It's ok. I was in the wrong too.

- No worries.
- Thank you.

Boss, the money that I owe you.

Could you help me think of a solution?

You gambled too much.

I won't gamble again. I really won't.

Fine. I'll go back and think about it.
See how we can help you.

Thank you.

Thank you, Boss.

Good, good. This is how it should be.

You said the boss was looking for me.

I rushed up but he said he wasn't.
Did you lie to me?

There is no need for you already.
Why are you still here?

Who said that I'm not needed?

Why are they so happy?

Because they have love in their hearts.

That's what I hate the most...

Love.

Love is power.

You will never understand.

Love is the real fortune.

Uncle Lee, we are here.

Why didn't you lock your door?

- I was waiting for you two.
- Waiting for us?

I knew you'll be here today.

How did you know?

I asked around.

Have you solved your financial difficulty?

Not yet.

So I'm working very hard now.

Hopefully, I can solve this problem soon.

It'll be fine.

Kindness begets kindness.

Thank you. It's thanks to you.

Mr Lee, my apologies. We are late.

No, you came at the right time.

You have guests. We'll leave first.

No need.

Please stay.

This matter is related to you.

Related to me?

Mdm Liang Ximei.

On behalf of my client, Mr Lee Jia Chen,

along with the witness, Dr Chong,

I will be transfering his assets
of 400 thousand

over to you.

So funny.

Are you doing a show?

Where's the camera?

Camera?

Is it here?

This is not a show. This is real.

Really?

Say that one more time.

I said, Mr. Lee Jia Chen

has request to transfer
his assets of 400 thousand over to you.

Uncle Lee.

Are you sure?

Yes.

It's real.

When I heard about your financial problem.

I really wanted to help you.

Help me?

I used to be a principal.

Hence, I have a bit of savings.

I want to give this money
to you as a gift,

to help solve your financial problem.

I want to help a kind
hearted person like you.

Help me with my financial problem?

Right, Uncle Lee.

You said you were a principal?

Some families are unhappy,
even when they are together.

I was the principal
for Yu Hui Secondary in 1980s.

I was supposed to be a role model.

But I did a lot of wrong.

Mdm Liang, are you alright?

I'm ok.

Are you really ok?

When I was young, I was really arrogant.

Back then, I had itchy hands.

I love to pinch people's butts.

In the end, my butt got a smacking.

My whole life was ruined because of butts.

As they say, the heavens are
watching your every move.

Whether or not, you have a religion.

You must believe
that in life there is cause and effect.

Yes, cause and effect.

Ximei, kindness begets kindness.

So the heavens help you too.

When you need money.

They blessed him with 400 thousand

and he hands it to you.

Mdm Liang. You're a good person.

That's why Mr Lee is giving
his assets to you.

Please accept his will.

Fortune Goddess?

Hi Fortune Goddess.

Ximei.
It has been so long since that incident.

Can't you let it go?
What kind of butt do you have?

You don't want it?

I want, I want!

Let me tell you.

Our cause and effect
arrangements are very fair.

Please, don't doubt us.

Ok.

Aren't you going to thank me?

Thank you, Fortune Goddess.

Alright, I'll accept it.

Never did I expect, he pinched my butt.

But he's helping me settle
my buttload worth of debts now.

A butt can harm people,
but it can save people too.

This is cause and effect.

ONE YEAR LATER

Ah, Gong, Happy Chinese New Year!

Happy Chinese New Year!

Good wishes to you.

Best wishes. May you have good health.

Happy New Year. Good health to you.

- Open the door.
- Someone's here.

Happy New Year!

Thank you.

Someone's here...

Happy New Year!

Prosperous new year to you.

Come here.

Let's go. Someone is here.

Lion King.

Happy Chinese New Year!

Lion King.

Every time you come,
I have to go to the toilet.

I'm sorry.

- Have a seat.
- Auntie.

Pay your respects.

You're here?

Happy Chinese New Year!
Prosperous new year!

Good fortune to you.

Good.

Auntie. Mandarin for you.

Is there such a line for the new year?

You don't even know how to pay respects.

Auntie, Happy new year.

Take the mandarin.

Are you angry?

Sorry, we said the wrong things.

It's ok. It's the festive season,
so I won't scold you.

You've helped us a lot recently.

So I have a abalone gift basket for you.

We're going to strike the jackpot.

Auntie gave us her abalone.

Her abalone is delicious.

Right.

Did we say something wrong again?

Have some drinks.

I haven't given you a red packet right?

Who?

Coming!

Guess who's here.

Canto Granny.

Ximei.

Happy New Year!

Big fortune and great profits to you.

You are really... great.

Greatly generous.

Really?

My boyfriend likes this.

You have a boyfriend?

Boyfriend?

- Where's your boyfriend?
- Annoying. Come in.

I like your big ones.

Not your coyness.

Can you tone it down a bit?

Wang Lei.

It's really Wang Lei.

Doesn't he have a wife?

Are you his mistress?

His wife ran off with another guy.

Really?

With who?

Mark Lee.

Really? Don't talk rubbish.

Really?

Don't mention Mark Lee to me.

Have a seat.

Fortune Goddess.

- She's here again?
- Yes. Let's go over.

Fortune Goddess, I'm so happy to see you.

I must really thank you.

For helping us sort out all problems.

We are now united in heart.

Yes, yes.

If we need to find you in the future

- where is your temple?
- Right.

Temple? Let me tell you.

My temple resides within your hearts.

- In our hearts?
- You speak so deeply.

I can never understand.

As long as you do the right things,

you'll accumulated positive energy.

There's no need to look for me.
I'll find you.

This makes sense.

- A lot of sense.
- Right.

But if we really miss you
and really want to look for you,

where can we find you?

Actually, you really don't have
to keep coming to me.

There are many other important
things for you to attend to.

I'll look after you from above.

Just like your ERP,
you can never hide from me.

Now we really miss her.

We should have more
important matters right?

Let's go.

Everyone look to the front.
Let's take a group photo.

- You know what to say right?
- We know.

Ready? 1, 2, 3...

Great wealth for the Dog Year!

Big fortune and great profits to you.

Good fortune to all.

Hurry up and change.
Let's take a photo in our next outfits.

Mother, can we don't?

We're united.

I know.

We must let people know that we're united.

I know.

So will you take the photos?

Let's do it.

- Are you ready?
- Ready.

Now that the whole family is united,
we will never have to fret again.

THE END

Excuse me, I have something to say.

Please remove the words.

Remove it.

Don't make it bigger. Remove it.

It's covering me.

Can you please respect the eldery?

Remove it.

Thank you, thank you.

Everyone, the movie's over.

It's horrible right?
I told you guys already.

Do you know why?

Because I'm not in it.

I'm telling you, for this kind of show,

the critics will give it

One star.

Don't block my face. You little...

Must maintain my image.

Liang Popo, what are you saying?

No, no...

I'm saying,
the movies by Director Jack Neo

are all from the heart. Very nice.

Actually, whether it's nice or not,

it's not up to me alone.

Let's have everyone
who saw the movie decide.

Is it nice? Come on, is it nice?

1, 2, 3...

I'm very confused.
I don't know what you are saying.

It's ok. Let's just leave it.

Next up, we have what's really nice.

NG shots are the best. Why?

Because Liang Ximei has a lot of NG.

She is the real NG King, NG Queen.

Don't do that. I'm giddy.

I'm 80 plus already.

Daddy, have you finished
my family tree project?

I need to hand it in on Monday.

Aren't I doing it now?

I want to see.

Look.

- Who is this?
- Grandpa.

Is this Grandpa still alive?

Watch your mouth.

Look.

This is Grandpa.

This is Grandpa's Grandpa.

Grandpa's Grandpa... Grandpa's Grandpa...

Grandpa's Grandpa...

I don't want to see Grandpas.
I want to see Granny.

Say that earlier.

Granny is here.

This is Granny.

Granny's Granny... Granny's Granny...

Granny's Granny's Granny's Granny's...

Granny's Granny's Granny's...

Mother.

Come here.

What's up?

Look.

- Fortune Goddess?
- Right.

She is...

Your great great great great grandmother,

also your great great great
great grandmother.

Right.

You can sell your flat.

Since your flat...

Then where am I to stay?

You can't even get one line correct.

I don't like to own people money.

Listen up.
I don't like to own people money.

Please don't think that I'm like...

- Continue.
- This horrible kid.

Don't be angry.

He's young hence ignorant.

I hope he will succeed too.

That's why so many people are queueing.

- So smart.
- What did you come out for?

It's not your turn yet.

- We haven't said "shit" yet.
- Did you hear "shit"?

It's important to have knowledge.
Or at least some common sense.

If not, at least watch some television.
And let's do it one more time. Hurry!

Let me tell you. This stupid...

This stupid...

Fly don't know die. Also don't know.

This stupid fly don't know how it died.

Don't call the police.

If you call the police, I'll kill them.

Why press so hard?

We'll definitely get a scolding.

Maybe...

Die without a burial place.

May die without a burial place.

Not bad. Not bad.

Definitely get a scolding.

Maybe die...

No burial place.

Die without a burial place.

Maybe.

Fifteen burial place.

I don't know what you're so scared of.

You're useless.

Open it yourself then.

Nobody's home.

Hubby don't go. Let me hug you once more.

Damn it. One more time.

Daddy fell all the way down
but didn't break.

Daddy fell down?

IT'S A STATUE...

Put to sleep.

Ximei...

GRANDPA, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

You can't even say
these few words properly.

Hello, Father, Father, Father.

Only his eyes move.

You wore black
for the first day of new year

to pay your respects to your father

XI MEI, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

Fortune Goddess, please have mercy.

Your...

Happy New Year!

Auntie, Happy New Year!

Pinch the mandarin.

LION KING, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

Take the mandarin.

Where is it?

Auntie, Happy New Year!

All the Hollywood, superhero movies
have a scene after their roller credits.

We have one too.

It's my scene now.

Director Jack told me to inform you all

that Liang Ximei will not be
having a sequel.

This is also not a concert.
There is no encore.

You may leave now.

You may leave now. Be careful.

Naughty kid. Keep blocking my face.