Weekend, Italian Style (1965) - full transcript

Thank you, Marcello
but I don't feel like it.

No, that kind of thing
doesn't do it for me.

Yes, with Lala, go figure.

No, I'd rather spend the
weekend at the seaside.

That's ok, I don't mind
getting bored.

And it will make my wife happy.

Oh, Riccioni is here! Excuse me,
I'll call you when I get back.

Ok, Miss, I'm hanging up.
Goodbye, Marcello.

Hello? Baltic Hotel?

I'm the engineer Marletti, I would like
to speak to my wife. Thanks.

Oh, no, no, it doesn't matter.



When she wakes up, please tell her that
her husband will arrive in the morning.

Her husband.

Very well, thank you. Goodbye.

I'm coming, I'm coming. Please,
let me pass, thank you.

Move!
- Why are you saying that to me?

Go bother those guys from Milan!
- Move, get back!

Step aside, please.

Excuse me, where's the Baltic?
Hotel Baltic.

Go straight ahead and at the end of
the street turn right. - Thank you.

Please. Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Please buy some sheets from me, sir.

Hello, sir.
- Marletti, which number is it?

224, on the second floor.
The lady is on her room.



They're hand-embroidered.
Look at them...

A perfect gift for your fiancé.
- I'm married, sister.

Be quiet!

We're in an elevator. Behave!

Stop, stop!

What's wrong with you?

Giuggi?

Giuliana?
- Who is it?

It's me, Enrico.

Hi, love!
- Honey, I'm home.

I'm coming out.
- Come on, I want to see you.

Come on, come on!

Giuggiolina, come here.

Giuggi, I've brought you a little present!

Thanks, leave it over there.
- Ok.

Giuliana, what did you do?
You bought those sheets?

No, it's nothing.

I've bought them from
some nuns, for charity.

I just couldn't say no to them.

Don't be mad at me, will you?

I know they're ugly.

Well, yes.
- Enrico!

What?
- What did you bring me?

A pretty thing, a surprise.

Is it big?

Pretty much, yes!

Giuggi?

Come on, get out.
- Just a second, darling.

Come on, we're at the seaside
and you take a bath in the tub?

Come on, open up.

Here I am, you silly man.

No, no, let me go, I've got
to go to the hairdresser's.

I don't care.
- I'll miss my turn.

Why do you always think of the same
thing each time you see me?

Well of course I do. I've been
thinking about it for three weeks.

Please don't punish me, Miss,
I have been a good boy.

Where's my little present?
- Over there.

One, two, three,
four and five.

Thank you, pumpkin.

Thank you.

No. Meanwhile, I will put these
out of your reach.

I'm going to the hairdresser's.

Get ready and then come and join me.

Marletti, nice to meet you.

Very well, thank you.

Shit.

Well.

Not bad.

- Sir.
- Yes?

Your luggage

Yes, that's right.
The luggage.

It's mine, leave it over there.

And listen, you should knock
before you enter.

Yes, I did that.

Ok.

Thank you.

Excuse me, may I?
- Go ahead, please.

Excuse me.
- Please.

Giuliana, will it take you long?

What?
- Yes, the whole day.

Couldn't you have done this
yesterday?

If you want, you can go and wait
at the lobby or at the bar.

You're so vain.

Hi, Giuliana.
- Hi.

I'm going to the beach.

Should I get something for you?
- Yes, my husband.

Clelia, this is Enrico.
She's Ms. Valdamieri.

Nice to meet you, Marletti.
- Let me look at you.

What a handsome husband you have!

I try my best.

You're coming with me?
- With pleasure.

Be careful with the sun,
please put sunscreen on.

Yes, I'll put it on, don't worry.
- I'll be there in an hour.

Ok.

This is my daughter.
- How pretty! How are you, sweetheart?

But don't you know you should kiss
a lady's hand?

"Madame, enchanté"
- Delightful!

And don't wear
that awfully short swimsuit

that you bought recently.

Let's go.
- I'm coming!

Let's go, the beach is empty
at this time.

...and since then, we don't talk
to the people from under that umbrella.

Do you agree?
- Yes, of course. Absolutely.

There are some lines
one shouldn't cross.

Just a slip of the tongue and
everybody on the beach knows about it.

Well, excuse me, but don't tell me
that's friendship.

You don't think so?
- Well, yes. Sure.

On the other hand, Giuliana and me,
we get along perfectly.

Because we both can't stand gossip.

We keep things to ourselves.
- Sure.

The less people you know, the better
off you are. That's what I say.

Hi, Gustavo!

This is Mr. Marletti.
- Please.

My husband.

Nice to meet you.

And the girl?

She must be in the water,
playing with Ms. Liberati's kids.

I'll go get her.
- Go, go.

He's not going to get the girl.
He's going to look at the young ladies.

One of these days he'll get
a heart attack.

Hello.
- Hello.

These two aren't really married,
but they go around saying they were.

He separated from a certain
Elena Saetti, from Milan.

He married her during the time of
the Republic of Salт.

Yes.
- That's a German called Hildegard.

She once had her passport taken away
for currency trading.

Go figure.

And he's a soldier from Perugia...

...who never takes off his shirt.
Do you know why?

Because he got the Duce's head
tattooed right on his chest.

Hi, Giuliana.

Hi.

Hello.
- Hello.

I know of much more things...

...but I won't tell you because
I don't like to gossip.

What's up, my little cue ball?

You won't sunbathe?

I was just sitting here
listening to the lady.

Hey, Clelia.

You look good with that hair color
Filippo did for you.

I might change my color
myself.

What's wrong?
You look tired.

Me?
I'm perfectly fine.

When did you come back yesterday?
- At three.

How was it?
- It sucked.

Good thing I left early, then.

You look beautiful.

Your tan looks great.

Oh please,
I'm having a headache.

It seems like headaches make you
look radiant.

Oh, don't tease me.

Clelia, listen.

I really should change rooms

with that flagrant girl next door.
I can't fall asleep.

Every night she brings along a new one.
I can't believe it.

All right, we're living in a
democracy now,

...so everyone can do
as he pleases,

...but your neighbor's sleep should
be respected, right?

The love bee must have stung her.

Pretty, eh? You like her?

No, she's too thin.

Good morning, sleepyheads.
- Good morning.

He's Giuliana's husband.

Mrs. Ferrari.

Nice to meet you.
- Hello.

And Count Bellanca.
- Marletti.

Nice to meet you.

Pellini, nice to meet you.

Where are the others?
- They must be sleeping.

Here's Pasqualino.

Good morning.

Hey, Pasqualino.
Giuliana's husband has arrived.

Marletti.
- Pleased to meet you.

What a guy! Very nice.

Here I am.

Giuliana, is your sewing work
making progress?

Turn around.

You're missing just an inch.

Because of something similar, Hitler
lost the battle against England.

I'm going back to work.
Excuse me.

And since when do you read
Pablo Neruda?

Why? Can't I read Neruda?

Sure, but it's the first time
I've seen you read poetry.

What do you mean? You see me
reading it now.

Here.

Hello everyone.
- Hi, Isabella. This is my husband.

Miss Dominici.

Marletti, pleased to meet you.
- The pleasure is mine.

What a cute hubby you have!

I'm going for a swim.

Are you coming along?
- Sure.

We'll go later.
Go, we'll join you later.

What did you say her name was?

Isabella Dominici.

Careful, that Isabella flirts with everybody.

Oh, well, I'm not afraid of her.

As long as you got your
Pablo Neruda.

Enrico, please stop mocking me
just this once, will you?

Hello, everyone. Hi, hi, hi.
- Good morning.

Clelia.
- Hi.

Giuliana, are you coming?
- With pleasure.

Who are you, her partner?
- Yes, hello.

Are you also going for a swim?
- No, he's not the type.

Goodbye, everyone.

Why? Where are they headed?

They're going for some
water skiing.

But don't worry.
Pierino is a little bit...

Really?
I hadn't noticed.

Come on, guys. Let's go diving.
- Yes, yes.

Come on, you too, let's go.
- Quick.

Let's go.

Do you know the gentlemen?

No, I haven't had the pleasure yet.
- Then let me introduce you. My wife.

Nice to meet you.
- Hi, I'm Marletti.

Doctor Risi.
- Hello.

Marletti.
- Dr. De Rossi.

Pleased to meet you.

And let me introduce
Professor Ferri.

Ferri, this is Mr. Marletti.

Marletti.
- Pleased to meet you.

You come from the south,
don't you?

Yes.

Something like that.

I've been teaching Latin
at a high school, for ten years now.

You're lucky: you don't need to travel
for five hours and wet your feet.

You think? Two month of paradise,
and the rest of the year it's hell.

Look, look.

Look at this beautiful Nordic one.

Here, here. Look, look.

Two delicate flowers who have
just blossomed.

Beautiful!

Such a temptation.

Fall will come and with it the
saddening solitude of the classroom.

35 teenagers with fresh hair
on their legs.

Please excuse me, engineer.
- Please.

Lotte! Lotte!

Hey, Lotte!

Lotte!

Help, a shark!

There's a shark!

Take this, you filthy shark!

The hand, my hand!

Momma, call a surgeon!

You don't know how to swim,
do you?

Enrico!

What?

Enrico, come on!

Come on, the auction starts at 1 o'clock.

What auction?
- Come on.

Hello.

At your service.

Enrico!

Brandy! Brandy!

Excuse me, sir, have you seen
a very small red dog?

It's called Brandy.
I've lost it, and...

I'm new here. Maybe over there.
- Thank you.

Brandy! Excuse me,
have you seen a red doggie?

What is this?

It's Celentano, he's singing
on Saturday afternoon.

Enrico!

Are you ready?
- Yes.

Hurry up. Don't you have to go
to that ball at the embassy?

Yes, I'm ready.
Come on.

Come on, hurry up.
- Yes, yes.

Listen, love.

What are you doing?

Are you crazy?

Leave me alone!

We could be seen.

Mr. Marletti?
Yes.

Your wife doesn't love you
anymore.

Come on, stop goofing around.
- She doesn't love me anymore.

Stop talking nonsense.

Does love only mean that for you?

Yes.

Few feet have walked on this carpet
throughout its three...

...centuries of existence.

As you can see, it's still
in perfect shape.

It's almost like new.

The initial price for this...

...persian carpet of rare beauty...

...has been fixed at a mere
100.000 lire.

Why have we even come here?
Why don't we just leave?

Stop it, we've only
just arrived.

Does anyone bid more than 100.000?

Take it away.

That turkish carpet was a real bargain.

Turkish? Those rugs were
made in Busto Arsizio.

It's all right for tourists.

Count Bellanca has an art gallery
in Turin.

And he knows a lot about art.

Ok, one of these days we'll make
a little trip to Turin...

...but I'm not spending a single lira
on this auction.

Have I made myself clear enough?

It's embarrassing, we'll be the only ones
not buying anything.

Are you Mrs. Scrooge McDuck?

Show it to the gentlemen.

Don't tell me this one isn't lovely!

Don't talk nonsense.
It's not about the money.

It's about not behaving like fools.
No, no.

Gentlemen, I repeat,
this is a real bargain.

80.000 lire.

90.000!

90.000 lire!

90 going once,
going twice...

...sold!

Sold to the gentleman,
thank you.

They found a fool.

The age of this vase
remains unknown.

Some say it's from the 18th century...

...while others think it's from the 17th.

Did you know that Chinese vases
bring bad luck?

Enrico, don't tell me
you're superstitious.

Sir.

Yes?
- I'll send it to the hotel.

No, thanks.
It could break.

We don't even know where
we should put it at home.

Your husband is very likeable.

Let me buy you a drink.

I couldn't possibly go with this thing.
Besides, I'm hungry.

See you.
- See you.

See you, Bellanca.
- Goodbye.

By the way,
I've almost finished Neruda.

And what do you think?
Tell me honestly.

I thought it was very interesting.

But...

However...

How should I put it?

Some images are a bit disappointing.

Your judgment is always
so precise, Giuliana.

No doubt about it, at some point
the images drop.

Giuliana!

Yes?
- Come, I'm hungry.

Goodbye.
- We'll talk about it again. I'm interested.

Thank you, with pleasure.

Close it, Toni.

Is everybody in this hotel this dense?

I said I wanted my pasta
without sauce...

...and al dente.

And you bring it seasoned and soft.

Besides, the wine is burning hot.

Isn't there at least some ice?
- Should I bring you a new one?

No, you need twenty minutes
to make them.

What fish do you have?
- We don't have fish.

No fish? We're at the seaside.

Well...

Then what do you have?

There's Vitello tonnato, or,

I don't know, stuffed eggplants.

So, just leftovers?

Please, Enrico,
don't raise your voice.

Everybody's looking at us.

At any rate, you don't get
to the beach to eat.

Yes, I do, and I don't plan to
set any fasting record.

I recommend polpettone.

So it really is leftover day, right?

I will have the eggplants.
- Yeah, bring them to her.

Hi Giuliana.
- Hi.

This is my husband.
- Hi.

Nice to meet you.
- My pleasure.

And the general.
- Morletti.

It's a pleasure.

Profesor Ferri, let me introduce
my husband.

Ferri.

Didn't we meet at the beach?
- Yes, sure.

This morning you were in a hurry.

Hi!
- Hello, darling.

How are you?
- Please.

Giuliana, you know you got
a most handsome husband?

You were keeping him a secret!

Thanks, but not all that glitters is gold.

Excuse me, sir.
- Yes.

Giovagnoli..
- Nice to meet you.

Enjoy your meal.
- Goodbye.

Hello.
- Hello.

Hello.

Hello, darling.
- Please.

Don't think much of it,
she blinks at everyone.

She believes that's how one
greets people in Italy.

Thank you.

You might be an exceptional person
and live by intellect alone.

Thank God, I'm a common man,
of flesh and bone.

And I didn't eat stuffed eggplants
since 1945.

Therefore I'm leaving.

I'm going to find a restaurant
and and catch up with you later.

No, Enrico, please don't.

What, what's wrong?

Nothing, nothing, nothing.

What are you doing?
You're going to cry?

You see, Gustavo? A family quarrel.

Inés!

You're being hysterical.

Ok, now we should eat and then...

Oh, no, I'll take you to Rome.
You have to restore your health.

Afterall,
they're not that bad.

Look, look, look!

Mrs. Marini.

Sir, you know who is that
young man with the dark glasses?

A private investigator hired by the
jealous husband.

Bon appétit!
The rehearsals are at 2 o'clock.

Clelia, you must be there. Bye.
- Yes.

Giuliana, the rehearsals start at
2 o'clock. Please, come.

You too, sir.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

Isabella, please pay attention,
you're distracting Giuliana.

Smile.

One, two, three, four.

Pasqualino,
you should also smile.

One, two, three, four..

How beautiful you are!

I'm tired. I'm going to take
five minutes of rest.

All right, Clelia.

A true artist.

Splendid.
- Thanks.

My feet really hurt.

What kind of clownery is that?

It's no clownery. It's very serious.

They collect money for the orphans
who have to spend the summer in shelters.

For the orphans?
Good.

Who is this beauty?
The second one.

What?

The second one on the left, that
cannon.

But that's your wife, engineer.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

What a drag!

Guiliana, enough. I can't stand it
any longer.

Doesn't your husband know what to do?

But no!

He's like the great artists.
- Come on.

Let's go, you should also do something.

Come on.
- Come on, go ahead. Dance!

Yes, he can dance.

If only.
- With the feathers.

But what are you thinking?

The back, the back.
- Down, down, down.

Come on.
- There.

Giuliana.

Yes, come on.

Sentimental.

How beautiful is life.

That's it. Poor orphans...

You're really good at it, you know?

Come on, girls.

No more kidding.

Giuliana.

Now me, now me.

Do you have kids?
- No.

Why? Aren't you able to have any?

Well, I can have children, but
then I eat them.

Please.

You're finally back?

How do you put up with this
daily routine?

Aren't you tired?
- Well, no.

No?

You know I didn't recognize you
earlier on?

You were really great.

But you're more beautiful
like this.

I prefer it.

Dear, in this heat!

Besides, I haven't slept
a wink last night.

But weren't you asleep
when I called you?

I don't think so. I had just
returned to the hotel.

From where?

We were all dancing at La Sansara.

We were all laughing about
Pasqualino.

Who is Pasqualino?
That jerk with his jokes?

I can't stand your mania to badmouth
people you don't actually know.

Pasqualino is really fun, he's a good
dancer and has obtained two degrees.

Sure, he came up with them
just like that.

Giuliana!

Giuliana!

Giuliana!

Who is it?

I don't know.
- Isn't he calling for you?

Maybe another Giuliana.

Tell me, Giuliana.

What's the matter with you?

Nothing. I already told you.
It's nothing.

Is it really nothing?

Perhaps a bit of melancholy.
- But why?

I don't know, Enrico.

It's something strange.

Like...

Like...?

Like feeling the sand of time
running through my fingers.

Now take a rest.

What are you doing?

Nothing, the car just needs a check-up.

I make use of this opportunity.
I'll be back soon.

Do you need anything?

No.

Where are you going?

Will you give us a ride?

What are talking about? A ride?
Come on.

Get out.

Get out.

Come on, all of you.

You, too. Get out.

Here.

Whose is this?

But isn't there a mother around?

You had a fight with your wife, right?

Go away.

Icecream Motta and Mottarelli.

Try the icecream Motta, it's
the best. Icecream Motta.

What would you like?
- A Cinzano.

A bit of Seltz?
- No, no.

And when did she call?

At 2 pm.

Did you tell her I'm dead?

Yes, but she didn't believe me.

She wants to know the name of the
cemetery and the number of the grave.

Why don't you take her?

I can't. You know I can't

Impose her on him.

Excuse me?

Sergio got a girl he needs to
get rid of.

Would you like her?

Are you into girls?

Well, I'd say yes.

Why? Do you know anything better?

There! 1000 lire.

We made a bet and he won.

Excuse me?

My friend said that you were a...

I said you weren't. Do you understand?

But how do you come up with something
like that?

What do you want?

You're following me for half an hour
and that's why I thought...

I was mistaken.

That could happen to anyone.
I'm sorry.

And you're probably married.

Yes, I have a wife. We're on vacation.

A jealous husband?

No.

A bored husband, I'd say.

You were wrong, give him back the
the 1000 lire.

Can I invite you to a drink?

Yes, thanks.
- You're welcome.

Bring me a small beer.
- Coming soon.

My name is Sergio.

And I'm Enrico. Pleased to meet you.

As for this one, I rather won't present
him to you.

- And how many girls do you have?
- Seven or eight.

- I'm going out with four from there.
- Yes.

A tiresome job.

Sometimes it also got benefits.

And you're one of those who work a lot?

During high season I get up to 70
or 80.

You maintain a good average, right?

And are these generally beautiful girls?

Not all of them are beautiful. Some are
quite difficult to desire.

But one has to fly the flag.

Do you prefer foreign girls?

Yes, generally speaking. Especially the
Danish girls. They're the best.

The German girls are very sentimental.

The American girls aren't my cup of tea.
But I don't mind them either.

What are you preparing?

A cocktail I invented.
It revitalizes you.

"Mandrilo drink"

And...?
- Yes, would you like some?

No, no, yo no...
Thanks.

I recommend it:

milk, some eggs, vitamins,
nutmeg and some spice.

And the Italian girls? How are they?

Tecnically they got no deficits.

But as far as I'm concerned, they're not
in the same league as the French girls.

That's a personal opinion.

Yes, of course.
- I haven't met any that surpasses them.

I met a really strange one. She had
some kind of tic.

Tic, tic!

Was it a lady?

Of course. She was always waiting for
her husband to arrive.

And don't you feel sorry for the
poor husbands. You don't...

You see, can I address you informally.
- Yes, go ahead.

I don't feel sorry for the husbands.
Noone gets off scot-free.

- Noone?
- Noone.

And how is this summer going so far?

Not bad, even though it's just the
beginning. But so far I can't complain.

The Grand Hotel gets frequented a lot.
Not to mention the Regina.

At the Regina you can always fish
for a desperate woman.

And at the Hotel Baltic,
are there also desperate women?

A bit of everything.
Nothing special.

I'm acquainted with one who
resides at the Baltic.

I met her a little while ago.
- What's her name?

Her name is...
Bah, I don't remember.

Giuliana, yes.

I'm not that keen on seeing her.
She isn't ashamed of anything.

Her poor husband is working throughout
the year to pay for her vacation.

And as soon as she arrives: Here we go!
Let's have fun! Yuck!

Sergio!

Sergio!

That's her, it's Giuliana.

Do you know how old she is?
Twenty.

And she's been married for two years.

Is that possible?
- Sergio!

Let's go.

I'm coming!
- Get a move on!

See you, Enrico.

Sorry for bothering.

But no.

Excuse me, but I have to...

She is Giuliana.

Marletti.
- Giuliana, my pleasure.

How about going out together
one of these nights?

Yes, why not?

Together with your wife, of course.

I'm up for it. We'll see.

Bye.
- Bye.

Goodbye.
- See you, Madam.

Goodbye, Enrico.
- Goodbye.

Giuliana, there comes your husband.

Enrico, where have you been?

Come on, get on.

Enrico, where are you going?

Come with me.
- Here, get on.

Here, with me.

Right ahead, champions.

Professor, where are we going?

To a soccer match. Married men vs.
Bachelors.

You're going to be my adversary.

Excuse me.
- And please pedal, don't just pretend.

Attention.

To the left, team.

The bachelors lead with 17:9.

Right now Marletti controls the ball.

Come on, pass it over!

Come on, Gustavo!

Pass it over!

Hand, hand! Penalty

Referee, hand, penalty!

Penalty, I kick it.
- Which hand, which penalty?

It wasn't on purpose.

The referee is a corrupt prick!

Yes, yes, a prick.

Yes, yes.

Whistle, whistle.

Marletti will take the penalty kick...

...after having kicked already seven
for the team of the married men.

Professor. Pay attention
to this one.

One moment.
- What?

All right, put them on.

I know, but he's not ready.

Attention, professor.

A foul with the goalkeeper.
Dangerous play.

Do what I tell you. Yes, no,
to the sideline.

Very quick play by both teams.

What do you mean by foul?
I didn't touch it!

Referee!

One moment, one moment.
The picture.

Very good play by the married men
who are now pressuring a lot.

The picture, the picture.

There, let's go.

Goal!

There, bachelors!

Bravo!

Giuliana!

Come on, pass me the ball.

I got it.

Take this, professor.

Here, pass it to me!

How was the game?

Why, wasn't it good?

Stop talking about the game.
Let's talk about something else.

It was a hand as big as a house.

Enrico, does your leg still hurt?

No, no.

Do you want to see a doctor?
- No, no, I'm fine.

I know. You're again playing the victim.

All right, I get myself a bed in the
hospital. Are you happy now?

Do you think there is life on
the planet Mars?

Well, there certainly is,
each Saturday night.

A good one, but I already heard it.

And what's it with you?

With me? Nothing, why?

I know you quite well.

Is anything the matter, Giuliana?
Or am I mistaken?

Well, there's nothing.

What should there be?

Pasqualino.
- Yes?

Come here.

Tell them to stop this German music.

The should play "The World".

And if I handle this, what will you
give me?

A kiss.

Not now, my husband is here. Later.
- Later.

This music drives me crazy.

Giuliana.

I've chosen a few verses for you.

I think it's a good image.

Read them camly.

- "And here..."
- Can I also read them...

...or am I too stupid?

They're by Dylan Thomas,
the great English poet.

Yes.

"And here...

- Good evening! - "...that night,
discovering your chants...

- ...the hell and heaven of love..."
- Giuliana.

Giugi! It's almost 9 pm.

Let's go.

Well, guys! Enrico and I will go back
to the hotel to change. See you!

- Bye!
- Bye!

- Bye, everyone.
- Pitching the tent!

- Bye, Giuliana.
- Good night.

Please collect everyone's tips,
professor.

Isabella, what are we going to do tonight?

Tonight we'll neither have dinner nor
will we sleep. Tonight is tango-time!

Well thought, you're absolutely right.

Very well, my little cat.

She's turning into a real housewife.

It's no easy job to educate these girls.

Thanks for inviting me to a dance.

You're welcome, Madam. Though actually
I invited you to have diner at our hotel.

I'm so keen on being with you.

But aren't you with me?

Did he do it because his wife
had been unfaithful?

Not to even think about it. Today noone
would kill for having been betrayed.

He had a debt of 600 millions.

Poor Cessano! Do you remember we were
in Portofino with him a year ago?

As if it were yesterday.

Which Cessano, the
textile manufacturer?

Yes, I think that's him.

- He was a noble and generous soul.
- Having a noble soul and founding

hospitals isn't the best way to
confront economic problems.

I can assure you that I almost
envy guys like Farida and Maresotti

who spent all their money on women
and then said: "Goodbye, that's it!"

At least, while ruining themselves, they
weren't foolish and knew how to live well.

- How will this poor Italy end up?
- Well, let's skip that.

Enough of grief, let's live up!
As our friend Mike uses to say:

- Happiness, happiness!
- Happiness!

Everything is getting lost, dear Porretti.

Marletti!

And do you know what's most of all
getting lost? Personal satisfation.

We feel obliged to pretend, so that
everyone thinks we're

beautiful, healty, strong and wealthy.

You're actually right! A little while ago
the chief of the accountants' department

at my office had a heart attack and didn't
tell anyone out of fear he might get replaced.

He said that he only had a flu, and
each morning, at 8 o'clock

he was there, rather dead than alive.
- That's how the world is, my friend.

- What can one do?
- Yes, but in the end

one should be able to cure after
suffering a heart attack

without having to be afraid
to lose the job.

You're a bit of a communist, if I'm
not mistaken, my dear Mr. Porretti?

- Marletti, Sir, Marletti.
- Ah, yes.

I can no longer look at the sea.
It frightens me terribly.

I don't know how to swim.

Just by looking at a wave my
stomach turns upside down.

But I feel obliged to spend three months
of the year on this boat

and to present myself in front of the
whole Mediterranean like a catwalk model.

- Today here, tomorrow there...
- Yes.

To exchange confidences, I also hate
the sea. I can't await the hour...

You?

You're lucky to be a mediocre man.

The public opinion ignores a Porretti.
Lucky you.

But when I disregard a port control,
just once,

on the next day the whole
administration board

will be talking about it.

"Tagliaferri has financial problems,
he needs to reduce his spendings."

"He's almost ruined".

And soon after that, panic strikes.
You understand?

I'm sick of the sea!

And also of women, whom one should
approach cautiously at my age.

No!
- Yes!

But I'm only asking for one
girlfriend, you understand?

Dear Tagliaferri, it's a real
disgrace to be rich in our times.

Today the rich man is really poor...
- You just uttered a big truth.

Yes, because a...

- Let's see, where is the shirtsleeve?
- I assure you we had

a wonderful conversation.
- Thank you.

Really, you're very likeable.

Take a seat.

I will think of you if one day I should
need a honorabe person for my company.

What?

Amen.

Give me some.

Drink.
- Thanks.

Well, tomorrow, more or less at noon
I'll be off to Venice.

What a malodorous city!

Wait, I'll cover you.

Good, my friend. Now let me sleep.
Good night!

- That's it.
- What are you doing? - Excuse me.

- And turn off the light!
- Like that. Right.

- Sleep well, eh?
- Give me a kiss.

Excuse me.

- The light.
- Good night.

Enrico.

- I'm going to the kitchen. Will you help me?
- I'm sorry, but I'm busy.

Oh, mit dear engineer. Get up.

Don't touch me! Don't talk to me anymore!

This boat dances more than we do.

"The honest women are desolate because
of the mistakes they didn't make."

Sasha Guitry.
And what does yours say?

"The only way to get rid of
temptation is to yield to it".

Oscar Wilde.

"You lose what you abandon."
Enrico Marletti.

Engineer and thinker.

Up! Up!

Come on, engineer! Give us a hand.

You should also pull!

Up!

For me, too.

For me, make it two.

Two.

I like fish.

How good it smells! - I'm going
to eat them all up till the fishbone!

Enrico, pumpkin, eat some fish!

What fish?
- But why "what fish"? This one!

- Pasquallino, Isabella.
- Serve us one.

Engineer, would you like some wine?

Is there wine, wine?

Thanks.
- Who wants wine?

Here, Isabella, here!

That's a great wine. Splendid.

Ah, guys, the sun!
The sun is coming out!

The sun rises at the break of dawn.

The spectacle has finished.
Icecream, roasted almonds.

Guys, it's late. We should return.

Good night.
- Come on.

What are we going to do today?
- How about tomorrow?

Everybody should think of something
and later we discuss it.

Or we could create a virus.
- Yes, lots of them, right?

Enrico!

Enrico, everybody is leaving. Get up!

I'm tired!

Wake up, we're leaving.
- Where to?

Getting to sleep.

Stay on your side.
How is it possible

you won't stop moving around throughout
the entire night?

What night? It's 8 o'clock in the morning.

And I can't sleep with sunlight entering.

Give it a try. Stay with your eyes closed
for five minutes.

I've been staying with my eyes closed
for hours, and I'm getting

really nervous if I can't sleep.
- All right, then do as you like.

Of course I will, I've always done
as I liked.

Eh!

Did you remember to turn off the water,
the light and the gas in Rome?

No, I left it all open!

Mister, mister.

Listen, did you see a little red
dog around here?

No, I haven't seen anything, Madam.
- It's my dog.

I haven't seen anything. I've been sleeping.
- No, haven't seen anything. These people...

They never see anything. What are they
doing here?

Brandy! Brandy!

Mussels! Mussels!
Fresh mussels!

Mussels! Mussels!
- Neapolitans!

Neapolitans! Cream biscuits!

I'm going!

Cream biscuits!

Attention, please. We're searching
for a six year old boy,

he is called Carlo. He is blonde and wears
a cap with white and red rays.

On Saturday the 22th some black people from
Madagascar will be acting in the Kip-Kap...

Cheers! Cinzano Soda,
your aperitif!

Where have you been till now?
- Going for a stroll around there.

Did you have fun?
- Yes, I saw a nice car crash

in front of the grand hotel.
Four cars, go figure.

Ok, sweetheart. Hurry up with shaving.
It's almost 1 pm, time for the beach.

I won't shave unless you first
give me a kiss.

Go ahead.

- Your coffee, Madam.
- Thanks, leave it there, Giovanni.

Come on, finish shaving.
Quick!

I'm going to rearrange that inept
Giovanni's face.

Sweetheart, leave those poor
little flys alone.

Be careful with the glass in
the bathroom, it's not...

All right!

Tu-tu.
- A train departs.

Where to?
- To Milan.

Tu-tu.
- A train departs.

Where to?
- Tu-tu.

No, no, I'm sorry.
- So confused.

One has to name a city.
- Yes, yes, to Tokyo.

Tu-tu.
- A train departs.

A train departs? Then I better get
going or I'll miss mine.

Come on, stop clowning around.
- Where to?

To Turin.

Me? Tu-tu.
- No!

But Enrico, what are you doing?
Are you sleeping?

What else, after all I haven't slept a wink.
No, look,

I'm not in the right mood to continue.

No, engineer.
- Engineer, give it another try.

No, I quit.
- For the better.

Tu-tu.
- A train departs.

Ah, I won't depart. I'm striking.

Ice cream, tasty ice cream, folk.
Who wants an ice cream?

For this child her mother pays!

Hello.

Hello, engineer.
- You're wearing a shirt...

You got a sunburn, right?

Excuse me, it's a gambling bet.

Ok.
- The latest fashion!

Wonderful combinations of negligees
and nightgowns!

Model Brigitte Bardot
Models of any type!

Buy it, ladies, and be more
seductive than ever.

Buy it, ladies, buy it!

Hey, Nando, come on, walk,
you're always the last one!

Come on, walk.

Professor, did you have success with
the Nordic girl?

I managed to catch her and we seem
to fancy each other. - Well.

It's a pity though that unfortunately
I don't speak a single word of German.

And why didn't you speak Latin?
- Yes, yes.

Flat!

Engineer!
- Hello.

Can you spare a moment for me?
- Yes.

Come with me and don't ask questions.

Alone on the immensity of the Atlantic.

Careful!

We're going to end up in the water!

I'm not scared, Madam. I served
in the navy.

Attention!
- Oh! - Excuse me.

Hello.
- Have a good ride!

They're fishing far out!

Do you know him?
- No, why?

As I've understood he's someone
very important.

Bye!

It's a good place. Isolated, quiet.

Let's go upcountry, ok?

There he is.
- What?

The brazen swindler.
- But, who?

He could have at least had a good enough
taste to choose another place.

Who are you talking about?
- Him.

Come on, woman, let it be.
- No, I'm going to show him what's good.

But then... is that why you brought me here?

Yes, what did you think?
- But can't you see he's wth his wife?

Liar. He swore there had been nothing
going on between them for two years.

You're not going to make a scene?

A scene? Me?
- Come on.

Excuse us.
- Hello.

Enrico, do you know Mr. Pellini?
- Yes, Marletti, yes.

Hello.
- We already...

Mrs. Pellini. - How are you?
- A pleasure.

The lady... I...

It's very nice here.
- Yes, it's not bad.

Yes, the sea is more... right?

Yes, far more...
- Yes, of course...

On the other hand, there it's more...
I mean...

I don't know.

It's more... no...

I thought...
I didn't even think.

I didn't even think...

What's the time?
- It's 13:40.

Damn! We should be going back.
- Yes, I understand.

Yes, of course.
- Excuse us. Goodbye.

You're welcome.
- See you.

Bye.
- Bye.

Did you see what type of man he is?
- Yes, I saw it very well.

And I fell in love head over heels.

I'm really stupid!

- Yes, that's right. I mean, no!
- I'm sorry for involving you.

No, but why?

I accompanied you without any
second thoughts.

Let's go slower, I don't want them
to see me in this state.

Do you know how porcupines
make love?

No.
- How?

Very carefully!

Giuliana, look.
- What?

The engineer has returned to the base.

Welcome!

It has been very nice, Enrico
- Hello Isabella.

Hello.
- Eh?

How was the water? Warm?

Hot.

Boiling, Mrs. Valdameri.

Hello.

Buy the tasty candy with nuts:
"Kiss me"!

Remember: "Kiss me"!

Will it take you long to
finish that jersey.

No, not really.

Hello.
- Hello.

How come you didn't introduce me
to them?

Who are they?
- Poor one, a week ago...

...her husband died.
But she still came...

...because they paid for the whole season.
That's right, they reserved in advance.

Look, look, look, look, look!

Mrs. Marini! She's navigating
over there, with her guardian.

Look, Giuliana, look.
- Let's go back, come on.

There they are, in that boat.

Professor! Are you eating here each day?

Yes, I'm interested in the hotel life.
- Hello.

Hello.
- Enjoy your meal, engineer.

Enjoy your meal.
- Thank you. - Hello.

Giuliana.

Giuliana, did you notice Mrs. Marini
and her guardian

didn't even get back to eat?

Clelia, please.
They must have gone to a restaurant.

Yes, together.

But will you be quiet at least
in front of the girl?

Look who's talking.

It's certainly not me who
scandalizes the little one.

Other than you I'm not here
for some eye candy.

All right, you always need to have the
final say. But now shut your mouth.

As far as I know you, you change the disco
if you don't like the music.

Do you know why he married me? Not
because I was the most beautiful girl

from Varonese, but because of my inheritance.
- Isn't that reason enough for you?

What did you dream about? A great love?
In that case you should have

just waited for the arrival of a blue prince.
I've been a good house husband.

No, in your household you weren't any good.
You simply lacked the water to wash yourself

and the firewood to heat it up.

Excuse me, I'm not feeling well.

A pity, now that we all eat
together and have a good time.

Engineer.

I know why he went away. He made love with
Mrs. Dominici.

That girl! What is she saying?
- Inés!

Please don't hit my girl. Otherwise
you'll have to deal with me.

She's also my girl.
- That's what you say.

No, sweetheart,
don't cry, my treasure, no.

Exuse me.
- It's ok.

Be calm, sweetheart, be calm.

Oh, look, look!
Pasqualino, Isabella.

The couple shows itself. They
have finished their session.

Where are they?

They look as used up as motor fuel.

I bet they won't even be able to
get to the table.

Giuliana!

Come on, open the door.

Hello.

Giuliana!

Listen, I need to talk to you.

Please open just for a moment...

Engineer! Leave poor Giuliana
alone!

You men will never understand our
sensibility. - It was a misunderstanding.

Judy, wait!
Where are you going?

Hello.
- Hello.

Hello.
- Madam.

This year we enjoy a really splendid youth.

Excuse me.
- Engineer,

would you allow me? I would like to introduce
you to the Princess Adolfi. Engineer Marletti.

Nice to meet you. Marletti.
- A pleasure.

The princess, with the birth name Boncompagne,
is a far relative of Milva.

Ah, yes?
- Furthermore, she has the entire collection...

...of discs by Natalino Otto.
- Otto, right? Congrats.

He lives in Rome.
- Really?

Yes, he's Giuliana's husband.
- Which Giuliana?

The engineer's wife.
- Why won't you present me to her?

Doctor.

I need your help.

I'm sorry, but I'm not a physician.
- It doesn't matter.

It won't matter. Listen.

Since recently, right after
having meals

I get heartburn, a burning sensation
in the stomach and need to burp.

I tried various medicines, but
none has brought me relief.

Yes, but I'm not a physician, Madam.
- It doesn't matter.

Maybe you can give me something.
Even if you're not a physician.

I'm an engineer.
- There's no difference.

At times, even the opinion of
an ignorant person can be useful.

After all I'm not yet 91 years old
and still want to travel a little.

To enjoy the world.

Maybe you know of some prescription
that would do me good,

I would like to cure myself.

Look, my sisters died in a car crash.

I don't have sons, but I got money.

But with that terrible stomach pain
I don't have the strength to do anything.

After eating I remain like a mummy.

What are you doing, doctor?
Are you sleeping?

Madam, if I were a physician
I would love to help you...

I heard that you're an engineer.
I'm not deaf.

Giuliana!

The key.

What's the matter? Are you going?
- I need to ask something.

Yes, all right.
- Wait here, don't move.

Hi Sergio.
- Hi.

What happened?

Nothing, I just told her that we
have to break up.

It couldn't last for the entire season.

You understand me, I have to
keep my promise.

But...

They just won't understand that
this is my work.

They cry, they get all tragic,
the get desperate.

But deep inside I'm not made of stone.
And each time I see them suffer...

...it makes me feel bad.

Hi Sergio.
- Most of all... Hi.

Bye, Enrico!

Doctor.

Doctor, have you gotten my medicine?
Doctor, the medicine.

Did you get it?
Doctor, my magnesium, did you get it?

Doctor, the magnesium.
My magnesium.

He really shouldn't be a physician.

Giuliana.

Giuliana, open the door!

I told you to open the door!

Giuliana, look...

I really don't like your behavior,
you see?

Don't you think you're exaggerating?

Why are you sulking?

For nothing.
- Nothing? What do you mean for nothing?

But do you actually think that I
have been with that lady?

What's her name again? The blonde one.
Eh?

Eh?

- No, Enrico.
- What's it then...?

What's it then?

Let's go for a walk.

Make yourself up, I'll wait
for you downstairs.

I think that I've always been a pretty
modern husband.

If there is some novelty
I'm all ready to talk about it.

Let's confront the situation.

Who is he?

Why do you want me say it?
You already know.

I realized it from the way you
looked at him.

When?
- What do you mean by when? Last night.

Last night? Where?

On board of Tagliaferri's yacht.

Yes, I know. I should have told you earlier.

But I didn't feel capable, Enrico.

I beg you to have some patience

and that you won't judge me badly.

I never said that...

You know that I trust you.

Thanks.

Listen, it would be better if we
take a rest, because if not...

Good, if you don't want to dance
and prefer to talk, then let's go.

- Do you prefer that? - Yes, dancing
has never been one of my strong points.

Professor, you're an ace.

You allow me?
- Oh, my poor head.

What a heat!

My husband is a satyr.

My mother didn't want me to marry
a man from the south.

But I...

I never had racial prejudices,

I always did what crossed my mind,
unfortunately.

I can assure you that today I would
act in a totally different way.

But, Pasqualino, what are you doing?

Clelia, look!

That's enough. Let's go.

I'm tired.

Excuse me.

Hi, there we are.
How are you?

Let's see. One, two, three.

Who will reach me a hand to
get off the hand?

Be careful with the arthritis.

Oh my!

Come on, let's dance.

Pasqualino, I'll buy you.

- Hi Giuliana.
- Hi. My husband, Sergio.

- A pleasure.
- Nice to meet you.

Let's go out for a moment, Giuliana.

Go figure, he has fallen asleep!

Believe me, Antonio, it's better this way.

It's better for both of us.

Yes, better for you, perhaps,
I won't deny it, but...

or rather, I would deny it.

But for me it's different, Giuliana.

I...

no, I won't say. I'm going to
condone it all.

No, Antonio, it's not possible.
I can't betray him.

You can tell me that I'm worthess,
that I'm foolish, a stupid woman.

But I can't, I'm not capable.

Don't tell me that between
you and your husband...

No, you're mistaken. No, no,
it's not true. Our marriage...

...has been almost complete, perfect,
wonderful.

No, I can't.

I don't want to throw it all away
for some moodiness.

Listen, Giuliana. Why don't we talk about it
again once you're husband has left.

No, Antonio, the conversation is over.

Besides, it would be better if
we stopped meeting.

Furthermore, that English dresser
from the XVIIth century I commissioned...

What should I do? Send it to you?

Cancel the order.

I couldn't stand the idea of
seeing it around the house.

It would remind me of too many things.

Too many things that should better
be forgotten.

Oh, my dear husband!
- Isabella!

Carlo!
- Go figure, three hours and twenty minutes...

...since I passed the customs on the highway.
- Bravo.

It's all thanks to the Maserati.

Now look into my eyes.
Take a good look.

How much did you cuckold me?
- A lot.

Sweetheart, I cuckolded you
many times.

Come, I introduce you to my friends.

I want to you to meet Giuliana's husband,
he's very likeable.

Engineer, I introduce you to my husband.

A pleasure.
- Nice to meet you.

Straying from your wife?
- You better look after yours.

Carlo!
- Did I bother him?

Ah, my back!

Enrico, Giuliana, don't go to bed!

We're going to eat spaghetti at Rossi's house!
- Let's all have dinner together.

Come on, let's go.

Let's have dinner.

Giugi! No, you go. No.

I will go to bed.

Engineer, but what are you doing?
- I'm going to bed, it's too late.

Enrico!
- Pasqualino, let me be.

Don't you like spaghetti?
- No, it's late.

Don't go on with your stories!
- Be quiet.

I saw it first. Would you allow me?

What manners!
- No, no, it was me.

Stay calm!
Let me look!

I want to look!
- What are you looking at?

The moon!
- The moon? Let me see.

Let me see this moon.
- But do you see it?

What a rascality! Gustavo,
I'm sure this has been your idea.

One moment, one moment!

Please let me help you.

Thanks.

I start with five thousand.

Yes, five thousand.

Fifteen thousand.

No, I'm out.

Good.

Cleia?
- What?

Don't they eat in here?

I'm going to look if the spaghetti...

...are already cooked.
- Yes, take a look.

I deal out.

One.

One.

Twenty thousand.

One moment.

Forty thousand.

Two hundred thousand.

"And the dice no longer tell the score.

You don't remember: other times

assail your memory."

Who wrote that?

Eugenio Montale.

Ah, yes.

Four hundred thousand.

No.

You can't see the cards.

No?

Guys, the spaghetti!
- The spaghetti!

The spaghetti is ready!
Let's eat, guys!

Ready!

Let's go!
- My mouth is watering!

I come first, after that the women
and children.

Let's eat!

Engineer!
- I'm coming.

I'll just finish this and...

Thus, it's two hundred thousand, right?

No, two hundred and forty thousand.

Engineer, they're getting cold!

Forty thousand are from the previous game.
- Ah. Should I fill in your name?

No, just issue a blank check.

Enrico, come here!

As soon as you're ready...
- Yes.

It's already the fourth
time we're eating.

Something to drink?
- No, thanks, I'm not thirsty.

Adelina! Bring the Conde Bellanca a
plate with spaghetti.

Do you know who that is? Now I remember.
It's the undersecretary of state.

Hello.
- Hello.

But sweetheart, that's our butcher!

Guys, we meet at 1 pm at the beach,
and then we'll...

...eat at the fisherman's, all right?

Enrico, do you really need to go?
- Well, I don't know, I may leave right now.

Soon the day begins, I want to avoid the traffic.
- Clelia, don't you need to go to Rome?

Go with Enrico and keep him company.
- No, I would just bother him!

- I'm not a young girl anymore...
- No, Madam, you won't be a bother.

- Will the little one also go?
- No, Inés won't go.

Oh, what a pity!

Let's all go to bed!

Bye. - I don't know what you're doing,
but each time you look prettier.

Will you return on Saturday?

- Once more. - No, leave, my love.
You need to drive.

Bye.

Come on, children, get out of here
with your rubber boat.

One, two, three...

One child is missing, Renato!
- Luca! - Where is he?

- Luca!
- There he is! Come on, let's go!

No, look, that one's mine.
Come here, Pippo.

I found him, Renato!

Engineer!

Did I keep you waiting?
- Don't worry.

Goodbye, Inés, behave well.
- Bye!

Look after dad!
I'm ready.

Enrico!

Bye!

Bye!

Engineer, you know that you're a conqueror?

Yes, yes. My daughter is in love with you.
She turned red.

Inés, eat well,
get to sleep early...

...and don't spend too much time
in the water.

Hi.
- Hi Sergio.

You're leaving?
- Yes.

Lucky you.

I talked to my friends. You don't need
to worry about your wife.

I already told you our job is somewhat
similar to the mafia.

Bye.
- Bye.

Hi Lella, look. Let me introduce you
to the engineer Marletti.

Hello.
- Mr. and Mrs. Soldrin.

A pleasure, Madam, nice to meet you.
- He's Giuliana's husband.

You're leaving? - I'm going to Rome
with him, but tomorrow I'll be back.

Of course.
Lella, do me a favor,

make an appointment at the hairdresser's
for me. I want to change my hair color

as soon I get back.
- Bye!

Radio bulletin:

Yesterday 150 Germans traversed
the Brenner-road.

Numerous accidents at the French border
have been registred.

No news from the West.

Riccione and Cattolica are being
flooded by Germans, Englishmen and Swedes.

There have been numerous cases
of damage on the route of sun.

25 deaths are the result of the latest
count early in the morning.

Viareggio is also almost completely
occupied.

The magistrate has invoked...

THE END