Virgin Mountain (2015) - full transcript

Fusi, a 43 year old man, still lives with his mother. His daily life is characterized by monotonous routine. The appearance of vibrant Sjöfn and young neighbour Hera will upset his old bachelor habits.

Hi.

- What have you got there?
- A car.

- Is it for your son?
- No.

- Your nephew?
- No.

Who is it for then?

- Good afternoon.
- Good afternoon.

I was speechless.
How can she be so rude?

Some people just shouldn't
be playing bridge.

Right.

At least not when there's
alcohol involved.

True.



Bridge and booze
simply don't mix.

You have to be able
to handle it.

- I can handle it.
- Of course you can.

Is Mordur in?

Dad, it's for you.

I'm coming.

Stop it, guys.
Go finish your dinner.

Hi.

I'll be ready in a moment.

Why don't you go
and get things ready.

I'm moving the M-10's
out of the ambush

and firing at the Panthers.

Why don't you use the M-18's,
the Hell Cats?

- Makes no difference.
- They're faster, you know.



Yes, but I'm coming out of
the forest.

What is it, Tumi?

Can I play too?

No, this isn't for kids.
You know that.

But you promised.

Maybe some other time.

Are you serious?

Was he shagging your mother,
just like that?

Yeah. On the kitchen table.

I had a similar experience
when I was a kid.

Mom took us to the Canary Islands
just after she split up with Dad.

She was a total party animal.
Went to the disco

almost every night.

My brother and I were basically
on our own the whole time.

One morning...

I woke up and there was this
big dude hammering my mother.

My heart started thumping
and I just wanted to die.

I still get this flash-back
whenever I see her.

The memory is just tattooed
on my soul

and I can't shake it off.

- You could try hypnosis.
- What?

You could go to a hypnotist.

He just kind of enters your brain

and deletes all the bad memories.

- Yeah, right.
- I've tried it.

And did it work?

No.

Exactly.

What are you bullshitting about?

What a moron.

You're a moron!

We simply need to get some space.

One has to trespass a battlefield
just to go to the toilet.

It's impossible to develop
a relationship this way.

Since when have you become
interested in developing a relationship?

Come on, Fjóla.
You're being cruel.

Try to put yourself in my shoes.

You're not supposed to touch that.

Don't get me wrong, Fúsi.

I'm all for honoring the memory
of historic battles and all that

but I wonder if you should be dealing
more with battles of daily life.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Not sure.

What I meant to say is

that the internet is
a magnificent thing.

You can practically just
download the chicks.

You sure couldn't pull tricks
like that in my heyday.

You just log onto a chat room,
finding millions of lost souls

dying to chat and this
often leads to something.

There are multiple cases
of people finding their

soul mates online.

Sealing their vows, even.

But even if it doesn't lead you
all the way to the altar,

it's a nice way to get
a taste of life.

Have your cake and eat it too.

What's going on here?

We're just chatting...
about war and peace.

Where were you when the war
ended? Can you remember?

Heavens no.

But I clearly remember where
I was when I heard the news

about the death of..

What's his name again?...

- Kennedy?
- What?

- Kennedy?
- No, not him.

- John Lennon?
- No, I'm talking about...

- Kurt.
- Kurt?

Yes, Kurt Cowbrain.

I remember I was doing
Svanas' hair

when you rushed in, Fúsi,
pale as a sheet and said:

Kurt Cowbrain is dead.
He shot himself in the head.

What a shock I got.
I'll just never forget.

Hey, what's up with Fúsi's hair?
Are we talking sex hair, or what?

- I doubt he's ever dipped his wick.
- Gross!

He'd need to have one
humongous boner

to penetrate through all that fat.

This is actually quite interesting.

Fúsi!

Give it back.

We were just wondering,
how fatsos like yourself

go about fucking?

You're not a virgin, are you?

Come on, Elvar.

Where's the sense of humor?

What's up with him?

Welcome, Fúsi.

- Same as usual?
- Yes, please.

- Is that Fúsi, the one and only?
- Yes.

Fúsi, my man.

- What are you up to tonight?
- You know, the usual.

You wild bastard.
Are we talking some heavy duty shit

to stir things up a bit?

Yes, please.

Hit me, baby.
Your wish is my command.

A special treat for you
and your work mates.

- Happy birthday, Fúsi.
- Thanks.

Open it.

There's more.

Read it.

What's this?

A gift certificate.

For a line dancing course.

It wouldn't hurt you to be
a bit more outgoing, you know.

Meet other people.

It's scientifically proven
that dance stimulates

endorphin production
in your brain.

What's that?

Endorphin?
It's the happy-enzyme, man!

Put it on.

Yeehah! Now we're talking.

Fúsi!
Come here for a minute.

- Let's go to my office.
- What?

Just a quick word.
It's better to do it in private.

It has come to my attention
that you are being bullied.

- Is it true?
- No, I wouldn't say so.

- Are you sure?
- Yes.

There must be some truth to it,
since it's been brought up.

No.

Are you sure about that?

A little teasing, maybe.

But that's just normal
between guys.

Nothing unusual.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I locked myself out.

Where's your dad?

I don't know.

- Would you like some cake?
- Yes, please.

- Is this Ken?
- No, it's an Action-Man.

Do you have any Barbie dolls?

No.

- Don't you have any girls' toys?
- No.

What's this?

It's a miniature model of
the battlefield of El Alamein.

What's that?

It's a legendary
World War ll battle.

What's so special about it?

It was the first time that the Allies
managed to beat the Nazis.

See there, up on the hill?
That's Rommel, leading his men.

- What country is this in?
- Egypt.

I see. I kind of recognized
the houses.

It's great, isn't it?

Hera dear, you mustn't go about
losing your keys like that.

Don't worry, we just had
some cake and milk

- and hung out.
- Milk? Did you have milk?

Yes.

But you know you're allergic.

Why did you have milk
when you know you shouldn't?

- I just forgot.
- Well, come along then.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Let me do it.
You're running late.

I already told you
I don't want to go.

Don't be silly.

Polish your shoes while I adjust
the button on your pants.

I don't want dancing lessons.

It won't kill you to give it a try.

At least try one lesson before you quit.

Then you'll at least know what
you're quitting.

This has cost Rolf an arm and a leg.

The least you can do
is to give it a try.

Why doesn't Rolf go, since he's
so excited about it?

Why are you sending him off
all spruced up like that?

He should wear jeans. It's line
dancing, you know, cowboy stuff.

Do you think I'd have my boy
wear cowboy pants?

Why not?

That's not a decent outfit
for a boy's first dance class.

- Are you smoking in here?
- No, no.

- Get out on the balcony, right now.
- Will do.

Now let's get started, everyone.

Make sure you have plenty of space
between you.

Snow blizzards are
expected in the south

and around the west coast ..

What's up, Fúsi boy?
Driving around as usual?

Yeah.

I hear the weather is getting
pretty nasty, is that right?

Yeah, it kind of looks like a storm,
right now.

Well, they could drop an atom
bomb and I wouldn't notice

all holed up in my
little studio bunker.

But I was thinking of you earlier.

This morning I was browsing
through the radio archives

and came across this gem

- I know this is right up your alley.
- Really?

You bet. You'll love it.

- Thanks a lot.
- Enjoy it, man.

Excuse me.
Any chance of getting a lift?

I live close by, but this storm
just freaks me out.

Sure.

Please say something, or I'll
take you for some kind of a pervert

who lured me into his car to kill me.

Did you have fun
at the dance class?

It was alright.

How do you know about
my dance class?

Were you spying on me?
Are you a pervert?

No, I just know because
I was supposed to be there too.

Oh? Why didn't you come?

I didn't feel like it.

Why did you register then?

It was a present from
Mom's boyfriend.

You should come and give it a try.
It's not that bad.

A bit corny, but it won't kill you.

Come next week.

I'll take care of you, since you
saved me from the storm.

I can tell that you're no pervert.

Thanks for the lift.
See you next week then, ok?

Alright.

Thanks for not killing me.

You're welcome.

What "AT" have you got?

The Semovente's got 9.

What about armor?

Those are 3 and
the Sherman's got 4.

I'll take the Sherman then.

So, how was the dance class?

- Fine.
- What did they teach you?

To dance, of course.

I'm aware of that.
But what steps?

- I don't know.
- You don't know?

You did go to the class,
didn't you?

Yes.

Then you must know
what steps you learned.

We just did some, you know...
One step forward, two steps back.

One step forward, two steps back?...

I'm shooting three times so you'll
have to get a five or a six.

Aren't you taking a shower, Fúsi?

Don't you ever shower?

- When was the last time you bathed?
- Last century?

- We should give him a hand, guys.
- Come shower.

Come on.
We'll help you.

You need to bathe, Fúsi
In you go.

You have to shower, man.

- Let's get him clean.
- I've got him.

In you go, you bastard.
Come on.

Pull him.

He needs a proper wash.

- Take him.
- Look out.

Hi. Do you want to come
play at my place?

- Don't you have any friends around here?
- No, I'm new.

Why don't you just come in
and play here?

But you only have boy stuff.

I want to play with my toys too,
you know.

How come you're a grown-up,
but you don't have a wife?

I don't know.

- Don't you even have a girlfriend?
- No.

- Have you never had a girlfriend?
- No

Is it because you're so shy?

I guess so.

But you're not weird, are you?

No, I don't think so.

My dad thinks you are.

He thinks I'm weird?

Yeah. Total weirdo.

But I don't think you're weird.

- It really is an upper class sport.
- Indeed.

But you can always find a way
to save up a bit. -That's true.

Have you ever tried making
crème brulée?

No, what's that?

- It's a French dessert.
- Oh.

I tried making it the other day,
- Yeah?

But apparently you need
a blow torch to do it right.

A blow torch?

Yes. When it's out of the oven
you put sugar on top

and burn it with a blow torch.
It's delicious.

Do you know anyone
who has a blow torch?

No. Don't you need a special
license to operate those things?

No, I don't think so.

- Fúsi?
- Yes.

- Do you have a blow torch at work?
- Yes.

Do you think Svana could
borrow it?

She's going to make some
French dessert. -Sure.

Where are you going?

- Well, you know...
- What?

Dance class.

But I thought you quit?

Well, I might as well
give it a chance.

One, two, three, tap.
One, two, three and turn.

To the side, close, side, tap

To the side, close, side and turn.

One, two, three, tap.
One, two, three, tap.

Look.

You've got to move to the
rhythm of the music.

You can't just choose
your own beat.

Let the music control
the rhythm of your movement.

From the top.

Ready! To the right,
and turn.

One, two, three, tap.
One, two, three, tap.

- Fancy doing something?
- Sure. Why not?

Did you have something in mind?

Not really.
I just don't feel like going home.

- Welcome.
- Thanks.

- Please have a seat.
- Thank you.

It's cozy.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

- The same as usual?
- Yes, please.

Do you come here often?

Every Friday.

You mean like every week?

Yeah. Unless I'm on duty.

You must be an expert
on the menu.

I always order the Pad Thai.

Always the same?

It's really good.
I recommend it.

A treat on the house,
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

Would you like me to call in
a special request for you?

Sure!

I know the guy. He always
plays me a song.

Ok. Cool.

What's your favorite song?

"Islands in the stream".

Dolly Parton?

Yes. Do you have a problem
with that? -No.

It can take a while
to get through.

- Radio 2, good evening.
- Good evening.

Well, hello there.
If it isn't my friend Fúsi!

I was starting to think that
you wouldn't check in tonight.

I just got held up.

What mischief were you
up to, bad boy?

I went out for dinner.

- At Thai Style, I presume?
- Yes.

You can't top that. What can I
do for you tonight, maestro?

Well, I wanted to request a song.

What else is new? Let's go REAL
heavy. Bring it on, man. Shoot.

It's "Islands in the stream".

- Dolly Parton?
- Yeah.

- Are you fucking with my brain, Fúsi?
- Actually, I'm not.

You've got to be kidding me.

What's gotten into
the heavy metal dude?

- Well, actually it's not for me.
- Oh?

It's for a girl.

That's my boy! Scoring chicks
left, right and center?

No.

You know I'll do anything
for you, Fúsi.

The song is ready to play.

Thank you.

And thanks for a good show.

I should thank you, maestro.

Would you like to come in
for some tea?

I don't drink tea.

- Coffee?
- No thanks, I'm good.

Well, it was worth a try.

Hi.

- Do you have milk?
- What?

I wouldn't say no to a glass of milk,
if you have some.

Where do you work?

- Ground service.
- What?

Loading and unloading airplanes.

Wow. Do you get free tickets then?

Are you going to take me on a trip?

What?

Maybe you can just sneak me
into the Duty Free.

To me the transit area is even
more fun than going abroad.

It's like you've started a journey
but everything has yet to happen.

I've never been abroad.

Really? I love traveling.

Hey, you've got...

Now Mom's going to freak out.

- What do you do?
- Me?

Well, actually, I work in
a flower shop.

Is that why you've got
so many flowers?

Yes. I love flowers.

I'm impressed!

It's a shame that you're
still single, dear.

- Well, that could be changing.
- Really?

Mom!

Well someone came home quite late
last night. I wonder why.

Mom!

Hey, Fúsi...

Listen. There's something
wrong with my car.

Oh.

Some damn hiccup in the engine.

Could you maybe
check it out for me?

I wanted to apologize for
what happened the other day.

That shower prank
was way out of line.

It was just supposed to be
a practical joke

but it got way out of hand.
I'd like to apologize. -Alright.

Listen. I'm throwing a party on
Saturday and I'd like you to come.

We're going to start early

play paint ball, have some nice food
and a few drinks.

You should come.
We'll give you VIP treatment.

How does it sound now?

Fuck!

Like a purring pussy.
You're a fucking genius, man.

Thanks.

- So see you on Saturday?
- I'll think about it.

Come on. Be there!

And we don't need to mention
the shower prank to the boss, do we?

No.

Oh boy. Sounds like you're
entering a heavy duty dating phase.

No.

She just asked me in
for a cup of tea.

Offering tea to a person
of the opposite sex

can only mean one thing.

Everybody knows that.
It's an international standard.

I sure don't envy you.

The dating phase

is the most nerve wracking hell
a man can get himself into.

Inventing new surprises
all the time,

constantly outsmarting yourself.

I get exhausted
just thinking about it.

But I mean, there's
no use giving up.

You've just got to
roll up your sleeves

A man's got to do
what a man's got to do.

Please.

I was thinking about a trip abroad.

Right. We mostly do charter deals,
but we also offer city tours

ski trips, biking tours...

Maybe some place warm and sunny.

Sure.

Hello!

I'm in the back.

- Good afternoon.
- Good afternoon.

I'm looking for Sjöfn.

So you're looking for Sjöfn?
Well, she's not here.

Is she off today?

Well, maybe that's
the best way of putting it.

Do you know when she'll be back?

She won't be back.

What are you doing here?

Well, I went to the flower shop
and they told me that you...

Mind your own business.

Why don't you just go, Fúsi?

I'm sorry. I didn't realize
you'd be so upset.

I don't care where you work.

It's not important to me.

- Egypt?
- Yes.

You said you liked traveling
so I..

You're unbelievable.

Why are you inviting me to Egypt?

Because...

I thought it would make you happy.

Of course it would make me happy.

But I'm just worried that
there's a misunderstanding.

I think you're a wonderfully
nice guy but that's all.

You know that, don't you?

Yes.

But still you want to invite me
to Egypt?

That was the idea.

Did you book one or two rooms?

I'm not sure.

I'm pretty sure that I booked
two rooms.

If not, I'll just change it.

I'm sorry, Fúsi.
I didn't mean to...

Sorry.

- Fúsi. Drink up, man!
- Cheers.

- Cheers.
- Yes!

Hey guys! We have a guest.

Give her a warm welcome.

Hello.

Take a look at that, Fúsi

Some piece of meat!

Check her out.

No, thanks.

Hey, I've paid this beauty queen
to break your seal.

No, thanks.

- Go fuck her.
- No, thanks.

You're my guest, and I've spent
a fortune for you to fuck that pussy.

Where's the gratitude?

I'll get going.

You're not going
fucking anywhere..

Take him to the room.

Hey! Hold him down.

Shit. Fúsi!

Cool it, man.

Fúsi.

Fúsi, dear.
You'll be late for work.

I'm not going.

- Are you ill?
- Yeah.

- Do you want me to call you in sick?
- Yeah.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Would you like to play?

No, not now.

- Why not?
- Because.

- Where are you going?
- For a ride.

Can I come too?

Sure.

Look at that.

Look, it's nice, isn't it?

I want to go back home?

Where did you take her,
you fucking pervert?

We just went for a short drive.

A drive? Are you completely
out of your mind?

- Are you a fucking idiot?
- Now calm down.

Don't you come anywhere
near my daughter again.

I'm sorry.

- You'd better come with us.
- What for?

We just need to get a clearer
picture of what happened.

- But I didn't do anything.
- We'll see.

Mind your head.

Sometimes she drops by
and wants me to play with her.

So, I've let her in and...

- And played with her?
- Yes.

And... what kind of games
do you play?

What kind?

What I'm trying to figure out
is whether these games

might include indecent behavior

or something that could be regarded
as improper interaction

between an adult and a child.

Usually, she wants to play
moms and dads,

but that's not really my thing.

So I've been suggesting games

that are closer to
my personal interests.

What interests are you referring to?

Mostly World War ll.

I see. So you've been playing
war games?

Yes.

And some moms and dads as well.

Alright everyone,
let's get started.

Find yourselves a good spot
on the floor.

Try to make sure you have
enough space between you.

You too, Fúsi.
Find a good spot.

We'll start with a simple routine.

Follow my lead.
Ready and...

Fúsi! Follow the ladies
in front of you.

Hey, look!

- Can I try it?
- Sure.

- Aron, come on in, dear.
- Why?

- Because I want you to come in now.
- But why? I'm playing.

- Just do as you're told.
- Damn!

Don't open the door.

- Are you alright?
- Leave me alone.

How did you get in?

I smashed a window.

Just go, Fúsi.
Leave me alone.

Go.

What's up? Have you been down
with a flu?

No. Or yes. I mean no.

I wanted to check if I could
get some time off.

I see.

- For how long?
- I'm not really sure.

You know you can tell me
if something is bothering you.

- I know.
- And it's nothing like that?

No. It's just for
personal reasons.

It's hard for me to say no.

You've already earned
a lot of unused vacation.

You've hardly taken
a day off since you started.

Sjöfn.

You have to eat something.

Sjöfn.

Can't you come out for a minute?

I made you some fried fish.

Won't you at least have some?

I've totally fucked up.

I haven't shown up for work.
Not even called in.

They've probably fired me
already.

The basic rule here is that
people hold on to their jobs

as long as they show up.

If I had to verify every alibi,
I'd never get out of the office.

But she's been suffering from
an illness. Depression.

Depression is just
self-pity mixed with laziness.

A really trendy cocktail
at the moment.

Maybe I could take on her shifts?

Until she's back on her feet.

Well, it's not quite that simple.
People can't just wander

in from the street and start
collecting garbage.

If an employee gets ill,
we deal with it internally.

But if this is really what
you want, then it's fine by me.

Can I sign up for her shifts then?

I've no idea.
I'm just the supervisor.

You'd need to talk to the guys
at the office.

Sjöfn.

Sjöfn.

I'd like to show you something.

Everything will be just fine.

Hey, new guy!
What's your name again?

Fúsi.

What?

Fúsi.

Foozy!

We're going to watch a game
after work.

Fulham-Aston Villa.
Will you join us?

There you go, Fúsi.

Great game.

Mom!

Mom!

Hi Mom.
Are you ill?

Rolf has left.

He broke up with me.

Oh.

Opportunistic son of a bitch.

He was never serious about us.

Look at you.

You smell like a garbage can.

I'm taking shifts for Sjöfn
at the moment.

Don't you deserve better than to chase
after a depressed garbage lady?

- Mom!
- What was that tone?

What?

- Don't you talk to me in that tone.
- What tone?

The tone you used just now.

I wasn't using a tone.

Yes you were.
And it was a nasty tone.

You're becoming a real chef.

I guess she doesn't cook much.

Is she good at anything?

You're not getting serious
with her, are you?

You're not leaving me?

We're just friends, Mom.

You startled me.
Hi.

What do you think?

Isn't it great?

Yes.

A bit further.
We're almost there.

Stop!

It's here.

That shed over there?

That's not a shed.

Don't you remember the candy store
that used to be here?

Wouldn't this be the perfect
spot for a flower shop?

At least the location is great.

Of course it has to be
fixed up a little.

Aren't you a handyman dude?

Well, at least one can daydream.
That's free of charge.

Fúsi, this is for you.

A small farewell present.

When will you be going to Egypt?

At Easter.

But I've actually given up
on the idea.

Oh? Did you get a refund?

I haven't really checked yet.

Shouldn't we just go?

Together?

I thought you didn't like
the idea.

But I do.

I was thinking...

would you like to
move in with me?

Do you think it's a bad idea?

No, not at all.

I think it's a very good idea...

when the right time comes.

What do you mean by
"when the right time comes"?

Well, there's also Mom
to think about.

I was fifteen when I left home.

I don't know what freak relationship
you have with your mother.

But if you can't leave home
in your mid-forties

then there's something
seriously wrong.

Sjöfn, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry but this came
quite unexpected.

I am ready now.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Is Hera in?

No, she's at her mother's.

I'm moving out and I just wanted
to give her this stuff.

I see.

- Do you want me to take it for her?
- Sure.

- Say hi to her.
- I will.

- Bye.
- Goodbye.

Listen...

I'd like to apologize for
my behavior the other day.

This has been a rough
period and...

No worries.

But thanks for the stuff.

Fúsi!

What?

Come here a sec.

I'm not ready.

What do you mean?

I can't go through with this.

What?

I made a mistake.

- What do you want me to do?
- I don't know.

Do you want me to take
my stuff back?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.