Virgin Bhanupriya (2020) - full transcript


Where are you, Irfan?

Khopri Colony, Lane 4, Room No 17, baby.


Titu has diarrhoea.
I'm taking him to a doctor.

Wait, I'll call you when I am done.

Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

Give it here.

Look over there.


Stop, stop, stop!

Hey stud!


I said stop.


Pandey, go ahead.

Take that way.

- Hurry up.
- Okay, sir.


What happened? Why are you hitting me?

Stop, stop, stop.

- Sir, sir, sir.
- Who do you think you are?

Stop it. Let me go.

Use the baton on him.

You sell local dogs saying
that they are imported breeds.

You sell them saying
that they are imported breeds.

But I...

There's nothing left between us.

You don't like my face
and I don't like yours.

That stands true only for you.

Just yesterday,
Moon said that I look like Virat Kohli.

She must have said Vinod Kambli.

- Have you seen your face in the mirror?
- Not possible.

I'm not a lefthander, you see.

Don't you have any sense?

- I have more than you do.
- Oh really?

Then accept the challenge.

You win if you bet my 1.07 minutes,
I challenge.

I don't have time to waste
for your useless nonsense.

I'll leave as soon as I
can find my LIC insurance policy.

Running away is a part
of your nature, you see.

You ran away from your
responsibilities as well.

Bhanu is a grown up now.
She can handle herself.

And I realise my responsibilities.

That's why I even come to meet her.

I ran away from you
and the crazy mind of yours.

Don't I have a right to live my own life

Keeping quiet won't do you any good.

Tell me, I can help you.

I know how boys function.

I know in which direction
their blood flows.

Let it be.

Are you stepping back because of religio

Rukul, I wouldn't have
made him my boyfriend...

...if I'd believe in such things,
would I now?

I know.
Go on.

I thought he must be
an active member of PETA.

He used to take such good care of dogs..

...just like my father is over
cautious with his bank deposits.

I didn't know that he would be such a do

Forget your father and
stick to telling me your problem.

He's in jail.
Police arrested him.

He used to sell local dogs to customers.

...saying that they are special
breeds from Uganda and Cambodia.

Someone filed a police complaint
and he was arrested for cheating.

Oh shit.

So, did something happen between you two

I give a damn shit about
this stupidity of yours.

Find 10 mistakes in two pictures.

Have you ever found 10 faults in yoursel

There aren't.

There aren't 10.
There is just one.

I got constipation by mistake last time.

But who doesn't have constipation?

Even Mr. Sharma's dog ate
something bad the other day.

He too got constipated.
It can happen to anyone.

Perfect comparison.

And let me tell you,
your brain is constipated.

Don't you know that the brain doesn't
get constipated, it get controlled.

A poet has beautifully penned:

'Your memories control my mind.'

'My thoughts and dreams
are now your shrine.'

- Excellent.
- Chuck it. I'm leaving.

I'm not done.

'Now whatever I think,
the thoughts don't seem like mine.'

- Let it go.
- There she runs away again.

Is I am an idiot man?

Mom, you're already leaving?

I'm so sorry, I am late.

Bhanu, I can't tolerate this stupid
man and his constipated poems anymore.

I am sorry.

Now I will only come to
this house when he isn't here.

Mom, did dad say something to you?

What will he tell me when he still
hasn't been about to say anything to Moo

But mom, isn't she characterless?

You said it.

I'll call you on Saturday.
I'll come meet you then.

- Okay, bye.
- Okay, mom.


- Dad.
- Yeah?

- Dad, what did you tell mom?
- Nothing.

I just recited a poem I
had penned during college days.

Dad, she was angry.

It is possible that
she thought that I stole it.

Everyone thinks that all
poems are written by Mr. Gulzar.

She has never trusted my talent, dear.

- Excuse me, dad.
- Okay.

Yes, Rukul?

What were you saying?

Guess what happened!

What happened?

You remember Avinash?

The one I used to flirt with in school?

Of course, I remember him.

You said I love you to him
and spat on your face and ran away.

Why do you only remember bad incidents?

Anyway, tell me what happened.

He happened.

He has asked me to meet him
at the coffee shop in the evening.

Oh, I see.

That's nice.

"That's nice?"

Why such a sad reply?

What's wrong with you?

I really cannot believe this.
How can Irfan do this to me?

Come on, man.

Hooking up and breaking up with thieves
looks good only in Dhoom series movies.

Forget him.

It's not like you were
dating him for two months.

It's not so easy.

I cannot forget these things so easily.

Anyway, you know that I am still a virgi

There are so many girls
who are still a virgin.

Chill, it will happen some day.

It's just virginity and not
Rajnikant's bones that it won't break.

Nobody stays a virgin at this age, Rukul


Dad's calling me.
I'll talk to you later. Okay?

Listen, meet me in the evening.
I'll have gossip for you.

- I won't spare him today.
- Fine.

- Bhanu!
- Coming, dad.

Yes, dad?

I am going to the market, dear.

Let me know if you need anything.

Dad, I'll go to the market after college
I'll get whatever I need.

Why will you go to the market?
I am anyway going there.

It's personal, dad.


Yes, dad.

What do you need to keep from your dad?

- Have you started smoking?
- Dad, I need to get sanitary pads.

- Pads?
- Yes, dad.

Okay, okay.
The ones they show on television.

"Ultra Wings."

- Those?
- Yes, dad.

But dear, you are so thin.

Why do you need ultra wings?

You'll have a comfortable
life ahead if you start saving now.

You have to get married too, you know.

This is so embarrassing.

Now what connection does
ultra wings have with my marriage?

I'll tell you.

Everyone used to tell your
grandma to buy ultra pressure cooker.

Buy a big pressure cooker.

You know how much pressure
mother was facing?

But my mother was so smart that
she always used a small pressure cooker.

I wish mom were here.

Your mother already has ultra wings.

She won't come back.
She doesn't understand poetry.

And don't even make me
start talking about saving.

Bhanu, I'll go to Mr.
Sharma's place in the evening.

I'll have the evening tea over there.

Why don't you join us there?

Bhanu, please... please be focused.

Listen, this is a calculus derivation.

I'll go with you.

There is no one in his house today.

I'll go with you tomorrow.

I promise?

- Hello?
- Listen, do you remember Rajiv?

Avinash's friend?

I don't recall.

The one who couldn't control
himself and shitted in his pants.


The one who has gap in his
front teeth and laughs weirdly?


You have great memory
when it comes to boys.

Bhanu, Avinash told me he likes you.

- Really?
- Yeah.

You are changing the topic in between.

I don't mind,
but he could have told me that directly.

Why did he want to meet you to say that?

Duffer, he told me Rajiv likes you.

How dare you!

How could you even think like that?

The monkey faced Rajiv
is sitting right in front of me.

You gave him the address, didn't you?

He's just human.

Love happened.

Moreover, you are the one had said that
you want a loving and caring boyfriend.

At least give me a try.

Why the hell should I try?

I am not that desperate.

You don't have experience, baby.

Boys like him later end
up becoming Shah Rukh Khan.

I am not interested at all.

Stop hiccupping and tell me what happene


Oh, my God.
What is this?

Why do you have this with you?
Have you lost your mind?

Whose is it?

This is not meant for girls.

It belongs to Avinash.

It's extra large.

Baby, I had a nice fuck.

But didn't you just meet him?

After such a long time?

So what?

I've lost him once,
I couldn't let him go again.

I don't repeat my mistakes, you see, bab

But don't you think
that it happened too soon?

You wouldn't have been
a virgin if you were this fast.

Shut up.

Chill, it's okay.
You take everything to your heart.

You talk to Rajiv.
I'll call him.

Lord Hanuman, you once wrote Shri
Ram on a stone, and He got Mother Sita.

I have written a poem.

Tell me, will I get Ms. Bhanu?

Say yes.

Fine, You can take the credit.
Now say yes.


Hail Lord Ram! Hail Lord Ram!

Bhanu, only fortunate ones
get people who love them so much.


I'll lose Avinash if you say no.

Look how these girls are fighting.

- What a cat fight.
- It's very interesting.

Rukul, you're selling me?

You are a big Shah Rukh Khan fan.

Isn't he the one who says
you should sell everything?

Sell everything.


Bhanu's on the line, talk to her.


Talk to him.



Fine, hi.

Guess what, I've written a poem for you.


Oh, you like it even before you heard it


You don't need to say sorry.

You should praise even
if you don't like it.

What you are saying?

It goes like this:

I'll pluck flowers
especially for you, you know.

I'll pluck flowers
especially for you, you know.

Once I'll hold your hand,
I'll never let it go.

I have changed the spelling
so that it doesn't get vulgar.

To make it suitable for family audience.
Censor is an issue these days.

He's talking nonsense.

He's a creative person. Talk to him.

You never know what
you might end up liking.

Careful, all my boys are locked in it.

Ms. Ramma,
have you brought a parrot along?

A parrot?

Ramma, all this is new to him.

- My daughter is here.
- Hi, papa.

- Hello, dear.
- Hello, uncle.

- Hello, auntie.
- Hi.

- My daughter.
- Okay.

- I'll go and meet auntie.
- Yes, please. Have a seat, dear.

Ramma, please say something
about my daughter as well.

Sure, of course.
Please pick up the cards for her.

- Yes.
- Wait. Three cards.

- Three cards?
- Yes.

Second and third.

Something stuck in your throat?
Phlegm or something?

It's a little... disturbing.

That's why I am thinking.

First you tell me then you can think.


She'll face problems having a child.

You mean to say some
kind of medical problem?

No, no, no.
Not a medical problem.

Let me explain in detail.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- There's a hero and a heroine.
- Okay.

There are songs as well. Songs, you know

There's a bedroom.

But the bedroom lights don't switch off.

Oh, come on, madam.

Have you ever seen a
song picturised in the dark?

Tell me?
Nothing will be visible in the dark.

- Why don't you understand?
- You are trying to say that...

...I can't have sex, right?


Ms. Ramma, please don't mind it.

Kids these days are
have become quite modern.

It's okay.

'There's a hero and a heroine.'

'There are songs as well.
Songs, you know?'

'There's a bedroom.'

'But the bedroom lights don't switch off



Yeah, dad?

I brought ultra wings for you.


I don't know why they
gave it a black plastic bag.

It's not a bomb.

It's so that no one can know the date.

I don't think anyone can read
the small expiry date so easily.

And what's there to hide in that?

I'm sorry, dad.

- I'm really sorry.
- Oh, my baby. It's okay, dear.

Come on, it was just a prediction.

No one felt bad about what you said.

Everyone knows that this
generation is quite modern.

You're my best friend, dad.

Do you plan to get me emotional?

I'm sorry.

Forget the sorry.

Go, wear these ultra wings
and fly as much as you want.

I will not mind it.

Answer your phone.

Yes, Rukul?

What do you want?

You want someone to go out
of business just because you are?

What happened?

Look, Avinash is upset
with me because of you.

Think over it.

It's hard to find a loving
and caring boyfriend like Rajiv.

And he is creative as well.

You'll die alone.



I have decided not
to recite my poem to you.

I'll recite something hit.


I anyway don't like poems.

Then should I sing a song for you?


Give me a minute.

"You are the reason
I pee (smile) so much."

Wait, wait.

Please repeat what did you say?

Repeat it?

"You are the reason
I pee (smile) so much."

I am getting an important phone call.
I'll call you back, okay?

Are you seeking revenge from me?

What happened?

I spoke to Rajiv on phone.

And he's singing and saying
you are my urinary infection.


Did you give him my
number to make fun of me?

Rukul, please,
stop playing pranks with me.

Give me a minute, I'll call you back.
Give me a minute.

120 Ma'am.

"Be generous towards your devotees,
Lord Hanuman."

You fuckin' moron,
what did you say to my friend?

I only sang a song to her.

A song about peeing, dimwit?

No, a hit romantic song.

Tell me what's wrong in it.

"You are the reason
I pee (smile) so much."

Wait, wait, wait.

Shut up!
Bloody maestro.

Say I am cool.

I am fool.

Say she smiles.

She pees.

Fuckin' idiot.

I've told you what his problem is.

He lisps, that poor thing.

Anyway, it doesn't make
a difference to me anymore.

Avinash and I are not together anymore.


How, Rukul?

Suddenly break up?

These days boys are
stubborn over experimenting.

Am I a horse?

What would you do if someone whips you?

Whip him back?


I too hit him back.

He thinks he is Mr. Grey.

Look Rukul, I can understand your proble

Nothing seems right after break up.

Right, my foot.

These days there isn't much
difference between boyfriends and shoes.

You can change them whenever you want.


Talk to him.

Go ahead if you like him.

I'll get going.


'You are a woman who is full of energy.'

'You will succeed in
the field of education.'

'But there will be
lack of love in your life.'

'Meaning, your hero will come for sure,
but he won't take anything.'

'You will be deprived
of the pleasures of sex.'

Hail Lord Ram.
Hail Lord Ram. Hail Lord Ram.

Hail Lord Ram!
Hail Lord Ram! Hail Lord Ram!

Hail Lord Ram!

Ms. Bhanu? Hail... Hi.
Thank you for calling.

Can we meet tomorrow?


When? Where?

Suggest an alone place.


What does alone means?

A place no one visits.

A place no one visits?

There is a Lord Hanuman's
temple behind my house.

No one comes there.

Idiot, meet me in the library.

Ms. Bhanu?

I don't think your idea
of meeting in the library is safe.

You should have called him here.

What's the problem with meeting here?

This is the safest place.

Rukul, I am meeting
him for the first time.

That too after school.

I too met Avinash for the first time,
after school.

I cannot be that fast.

That's why you are a virgin.


- Hey.
- Excuse me.



Please keep this a secret, okay?

Of course, yeah.

She's junior to us.

She isn't scared but you are.

'Toilet is not safe.'

Rukul, please, let me meet him first.

And I can't do anything big
without falling in love with him.

I told you, no one comes to this section

It's very very safe.

- There are still ten minutes left, righ
- Yes.

I am waiting four lanes away.
I'll signal as soon as I see him.

And listen, boys these days are cowards.

Give him some hints, okay?

- Be a little forward. Got it?
- Okay. I will manage.

Fine. All the best, baby.


He isn't here yet.

Ms. Bhanu!

- Hi.
- Fine, hi.

I'm sorry, I'm a little late.
Because of this flower.

No, thanks.

I was confused as to what flower to take

Red or yellow? Yellow or red.

Keep your voice down.

Someone might hear us.

What nice fragrance.

Nice watch.

I really like the design.

Thank you.

It's really nice. It's...

Playing gooseberry.



It's just an idiom.


Meaning when someone interrupts,
he's playing gooseberry.

Oh, I see. That way.

Yes, that way.

How did you like my small stars' tattoo?

I got them made recently.

You know how it goes.

I'm letting you know
because you are a friend.

One should change with changing times.

You too need to be modern and liberal no

Because this generation only
thinks about the things they like.

Do you think I am not a modern father?

I'd say the boy's fair,
fares okay in studies too...

...and most importantly his father
has a government job in our city.

Sooner rather than later,
he too will get one.


Bhanu anyway likes the boy.


You and your wife should talk to Bhanu.

How many times will you
keep repeating the same thing?

Hang up.

Why? What happened?

Bhanu was caught kissing in the college.

What rubbish.

Where will kids kiss if not in college?
In temples?

How very LS.

That monkey is sitting with dad.

Mom too is going to join them.

What will I tell them?

Simple, dumbo.
He asked you for help.

Then he made up some excuse
and took you to the Hindi section.

Then he used the excuse of
taking a book and tried to kiss.

And teacher slapped him before you could


This is the biggest
advantage we girls have.

We can defame anyone, anywhere, anytime.

The more you lie the
nobler you will become.

You have a few things that belong to me.

Either pay the rent
or take the things away.

You are an amazing poet.

Why don't you compete for awards?

- Awards?
- Yes.

- Come on.
- No, it's possible.

Why is the waiter sitting here?

No, he's our son-in-law.

Bhanu's boyfriend.


- Yes.
- Hello.

Thank you so much for
a wonderful suggestion.

I love you.

Sorry, mom. I was talking on the phone.

Bhanu, you never told
us about your boyfriend.

What would you like to have, Madhu?

- Listen, please, please just go.
- You should know.

- How would I know?
- I had come to say sorry to you.

Yes, I forgive you. Please just go.

Don't embarrass me in front of my parent

How can you just leave, son?
Where are you going?

Have lunch with us.

No papa, he is late for his dance class.

- Oh.
- He has to leave.

He is such a bumpkin.
I doubt he can dance at all.

Rajiv, please go.

- Bye, uncle.
- Bye, son.

- Bye, auntie.
- Bye.

- Good-bye.
- Very good.

He's such a nice boy.

- Bhanu, he is the right choice.
- Like hell right choice.

Bhanu, I won't attend
your wedding if you marry him.

You cannot spoil your life like I had.

Mom, I don't even know him that well.

Then you two were kissing just for fun?

It was a sort of curiosity.


What kind of a curiosity is this?

Why can't it be?

It's okay, dear.
Keep trying.

How can someone kiss just like that?

You can anyway do nothing.

At least let her live her life.

What can I not do?

I did four Suryanamaskars
in three minutes.

You won't even be able to do one, fatso.

What did you call me?

- Fatso?
- Yeah, fat lady.

Fuck it, mom and dad.

You two are always fighting.

Bhanu, these types of
cusses are not our standard.

You can't say fuck and all.

If you find something to be
strange then you can say "oh fish".

If it's just girls then you can say FU,

- It's okay then.
- Mom.


Are you educating her or
giving her a crash course on cusses.

It is necessary these days.

Teach her something good.
Like Ramcharitmanas.

Only I know how many
nights you have ruined...

...of mine with this attitude of yours.

Bhanu, listen.

It helps you sleep better.

How would you know? Insomniac person.

Oh, shut up.
Don't interrupt.

Bhanu, listen to me.
You have to get a good guy.

At least... he should be like a hero.

Trust me, such dumbos are of no good.

I'll call you on Saturday.
Then we will talk at leisure.


When you cannot even add
the right amount of sugar in tea...

...what can one expect
you to do with your life?

- Bye, dear. Bye.
- Love you, mom. Bye.

- Love you.
- Bye-bye.

Excuse me, dad.

- I'm taking a call.
- Please, please.

Yes, Rukul? Tell me.

There is an offer for you.


- My library's sensation...
- Yeah?

He has a handsome, notorious friend.

I'll introduce you to him.

What are you doing?

At least let me get out of this shock.


You still haven't acted like
a chaste woman before your parents?

I swear, I am in shock.

And only one shock
can get you out of another.

And the one I am talking
about has such an interesting name...

...that you will get a shock
as soon as you'll hear it.

You are giving a build up like you are
not talking about a boy but James Bond.

You cannot guess it.

Forget you, no one can guess it.

Will you say it already?

Ladies and gentleman.

Brace yourselves.

We have the owner of Orbit Cables.

King of hearts.

The famous gambler, Shartiya.

So, who's our target?

The office boy in blue shirt.

How much?

I'll bet a 100.

My last 100.

- Hail the Goddess.
- Put it in.

I am not scared either.
Here you go.

'He puts more energy than
he has in his body in winning a bet.'


- Run!
- Run!


Rukul, he is quite heroic.

I don't deal with fake stuff, baby.

I'm the original Flipkart.

Now I'll give our introduction.

He's Jhanda.


He's Pungi.

That's Chukiya.

And I am Shartiya.

Want to go on a trip with me?

"My heart's crossed its bounds...

"And leaped into yours."

"My heart's crossed its bounds...

"And leaped into yours."

"It's being adamant..."

"It wants you to be mine."

"You don't let me live."

"I don't let you live."

"If this is love then it is what it is."

"I won't accept it any other way."

"I keep losing myself."

"I keep becoming you."

"If this is love then it is what it is."

"I won't accept it any other way."

"My heart's crossed its bounds...

"And leaped into yours."

"I don't wish to flow away like a river.

"I seek your shore."

"Come and hold me."

"I want to lose myself."
"I want to be you."

"Take me into your arms."

"I don't wish to flow away like a river.

"Come and hold me."

"I want to lose myself."
"I want to be you."

"Take me into your arms."

"We have an opportunity."

"We are willing."

"We are together."

"You want it."
"I want it."

"Come, let's act crazy."

"You don't let me live."

"I don't let you live."

"If this is love then it is what it is."

"I won't accept it any other way."

A penny for your thoughts?

It's nothing. I was just thinking.


That you are so nice.

I mean you help others.

You don't smoke.

You don't chase skirts.

Honestly speaking,
you are the ideal man like Lord Ram.

Don't mention that name.
He's an old enemy.

Got it?

Dumbo, I mean why don't you stop betting

Stupid, if air gets out of the balloon
and a sim gets out a mobile phone...

...gas gets out a cold drink
and Shartiya stops betting...

...then there will be nothing left insid

Why do you want me empty?

Why not enjoy a complete man?

Oh, a smile.

You are moving in the right direction.

Come on, it's time for another bet.

Today I need to catch
a beak of a flying crow.

You know no one can beat me at that.

Want to come along?

No, I need to go home.

My father must be waiting for me.

Your father.

- Okay, bye.
- Bye.

Do you know why I like you?

Because your eyes, both the two
at the back and the two in the front...

...are always completely focused on me.

Ms. Glasses.

Life becomes boring
without any spice in it.

What do you think, Vijay?

Mere mention of spices burns my tongue.

- Let me help you with the tie.
- Oh, thank you, Moon.

- Hello, Moon auntie.
- My daughter is back.

Hello, dear.

We were just about to
leave for the farewell party.

Bhanu, talk to Moon,
I'll go get my blazer.

You must have said that I'm playing
gooseberry in your mind, right auntie?

What do you mean?


I just met mom so I recalled a phrase.

How's your mom?

She's good.
She was exercising.

She has lost a lot of weight too.

She's looking very sexy.

I'll lose weight too,
I just need someone to motivate me.

Who needs motivation?

It's nothing, dad.

Auntie is saying that she's
looking very ugly and fat.

She wants motivation to lose weight.

- What?
- Hey, you are fit.

Do you want to be Mrs. Universe?

I don't know about Mrs. Universe.

First, let me become a missus.

- We should leave, Bhanu.
- Yes. Please, please, please.

Bhanu, I'll be late.

- Please keep the doors locked.
- Okay, dad. Be safe.

My baby.

- Don't forget to lock the doors.
- Okay.

- Come on. Thank you.
- Please, please, please.

- Don't forget about the doors, Bhanu.
- Bye, Bhanu.

- Bye, dad.
- Bye.

- Please.
- Thank you.

My pleasure.

He didn't message me even once.

And he thinks he's a romantic hero.

Oh, my God!
What a pleasant surprise.

Oh God, yes!

Wait, let me make a phone call.

Answer the phone, Rukul.

Answer the phone!

Oh no!

- What is it?
- Where the hell were you?

I'm in the toilet.
I'm suffering from constipation.

Nothing's coming out.

Listen, Shartiya messaged me.

Dad's gone out for a wedding.

He won't be back before 12.

That means a gold opportunity.


Call him over.

But listen, behave femininely.

Don't be overly direct that
makes the boys lose interest.

Tug half the rope and
let the other half loose.

That's one twisted advice.

Just call him home.
I am sure he will handle the rest.

Wait a second.

Rukul, have you done anything with him?

Are you crazy?

Why would I go after your guy?
He is forbidden to me.

There is something know
as sixth sense as well.

Okay listen,
how should I tell him to come over?

Tell him: The door's open, come in while
you can and go bang-bang-bang.

How cheap, Rukul.

If you cannot even do that
then you should just forget about it.

Okay, fine.

Let me try.

But listen, keep dropping
hints at equal intervals. Please.

I'm getting some pressure,
so you handle your own pressure.

Okay, bye.

What is Madhu doing here?


She starts dancing
as soon as she hears music.

Yet she doesn't lose any weight.

Would you like to dance with me?

You can make me dance to
your tunes any time you want.

Let's go.

Who the artistic one in your family?

An artist.


The Bollywood fan.

My dad.


Actually, I too am quite creative.


Would you like to see my sketches?

Of course.

What's the hurry?

"Don't ask me what happened."

"Don't ask me how I felt."

"Don't ask me what happened."

"Don't ask me how I felt."

"I have already fallen for you."

"I don't know what's in
stored for me in the future."

"Don't ask me what happened."

"Don't ask me how I felt."
- Why are you showing me this hut?

"I have already fallen for you."

"I don't know what's in
stored for me in the future."

"Don't ask me what happened."

"I found the world of love."

"I started believing that you are mine."

"Yet, this question
and this thought lingers..."

Here's your gift.

Thank you.
Thanks for the bottle.

Would you like to see my bedroom?

- Yes.
- Let me show you my bedroom.

"Whatever I have..."
"Me and my love..."

"I'll surrender it all to you."

What does "those who can't
dance blame the floor" mean?

It's getting darker.

The moon is about to get eclipsed.

"How do I say what happened, my love."

"How did I feel?"

"I have already fallen for you."

"I don't know what's in
stored for me in the future."

"Don't ask me what happened."

This is when I got the first
prize in school painting competition.

My daddy.

And this is when I ranked
first in the district in mathematics.

This is when I stood first in debate.

You have always topped.
Have you never failed?


I am not enjoying myself in here.

Let's go outside.

Why? What happened?

- You didn't like my room?
- No, it's nice.

But I would like to sit outside.



With the prayers, bitch.

Sex, what else!

I am so confused.

I don't understand.

I took him to my bedroom.

But he ran away and
went to sit in the hall.

Get close to him, hold his hand.

And if it still doesn't
work then attack him.

He cannot escape.

Rukul, do you want me to rape him?

Dumbo, have you ever
heard a boy crying rape?

We are the weaker sex,
we enjoy it like the rest.

Oh, my God!

Vijay, please.

My father paid for that car!

Get that witch out of there!

- Get her out!
- She's crazy.

Please run her over.

What are you saying?
I'll get charged with murder.

And for asking dowry too.

- What are you doing, Madhu?
- Just shut up.

Why do you always keep
your collars unfolded?

Because I am a king.

And your queen?

Why are you blinking like that?

It's ominous.

You mean inauspicious?


Why don't you ask him
to write a dictionary?

You invited him over
to play crossword, right?

What are you looking at?

Come on, let's celebrate.

He wants you drunk.

That means he didn't
get any of your hints.

What are you looking at?

Come on, let's celebrate.


It's now or never!

It's now or never!

Hey, what are you doing?
What are you doing?


It's now or never!

It's now or never!

That's what I am saying.
It's now or never.

First we celebrate.

But it's not necessary.

It's necessary.

I'll first celebrate.

Okay, as you wish.

Go head.
Drink it.


Your dad's back?


Go inside. I'll go and check who it is.

Her old man has really bad timing.

You are putting all the weight on me.

Hold him from there.

Let's get him out of here.


Don't drink anything he offers.

Drag him out.
Let's take him away.

What happened?

Who was it?

No one.

Neighbour's kids.

They often do pranks like this.

Oh, I see.

Come on, let's celebrate.

Why don't you drink it first?

As they say in English, ladies first.

Let's change the style then.

This time, you drink it first.

Is this an election?

Do you want to change the candidate now?

For me?

Look sweetheart, listen to me.

Just have a sip of it.

Have it, please.

Just one sip.


- One sip.
- No. I don't want it.

Drink just one sip of it. I am
sure you can have one sip, my sweetheart

No, I don't want to.


So now, you will shout at me?

If you don't have a sip from
it now then we will no longer be friends

I don't want to be friends with you.

I'll call the police,
if you don't leave immediately.

You'll call the police?

So you are threatening me with the polic

You cunning witch...

Not even a blind man would date an ugly,
spectacled girl like you.

You should venerate me.

You should thank me for going
out with you for a few dates.

Not trot around the market
with your open tresses.

Head and Shoulder's lice-infected
model wants to go for L'Oreal!

Get lost!


Damn it!

I lost a bet because of her.

She ruined such a good atmosphere,
didn't she, Moon?

Did you also think that
this evening was quite romantic?

Can I say something if you don't mind?

Of course.

Sometimes when you lift your eyes...

I feel you want to say
something that you hide.

And what do I want to say?

I am scared to say it.

Oh really?

I swear.

How sweet.

I'll get going then?

- Good night.
vGood night.


"Oh my Chandni!"

"You are my moonlight."


Oh, my God!

I am so dead!


Why did you leave the door open?



"Oh my Chandni!"



There you are.
You left the door open.

But it's okay.
It's a nature's call.

It can come anytime.

You kept telling me that I
don't see the brighter side of life.

So today, I looked at the brighter side.

And do you know who did
I find on that brighter side?

Your Moon auntie.

Bhanu, I think I have found true love.

I want get drunk today.

Come, my friend.

Let's celebrate together.

It's okay if you are going to take time.

There is no time limit on this.

Actually, I shouldn't be disturbing you.

"With colourful clouds..."

"With the kohl in your eyes..."

"I have written your name on my heart."


"Oh my Chandni!"


Thank you Bhanu, for this.



"With the kohl in your eyes..."

"I have written... on my heart..."



What happened, papa?



Get up, papa!

Can you hear me, papa?


Papa, please.



Open your eyes, papa. Come on, papa.


Bro, I think your bad times have started

You lost that bet as well as this bet.

The girl didn't drink any of it.

Now Lord Ram will come and send
an arrow straight through your navel.

Hey, don't mention that name.

And what's a navel?

Fatso, explain.

You don't know navel? The bellybutton.

Hey, play your turn.


Look at my face cut, man.

Do I look like a Ravan?

Do I?

I have just lost two bets and not my lif
Do you understand?

- Let's wait for the third bet.
- Right.

Then I'll fill your mouth with JK Cement


Yours too.

Stop laughing.

You are done for.

Play your turn.

Why is she charging this way?

She's all yours.

Let's go, boys.


I want to talk to all of you.


Look at me.

Why are you looking away?

I thought you are a human being.

That you have feelings.

I know I am easy to get convinced.

Yes, I got convinced.

Because I can never get someone
as handsome and heroic as you.

But you aren't heroic.

You are a coward.

What's with these tough IIT questions?

We didn't murder anyone.



My father's in the ICU
because he drank your alcohol.

You'd be charged with two murders
if anything had happened to him.

And yes, try telling someone
about your loathsome deed.

Then I'll bet that no one would
even want to spit on your disgusting fac

"Who do those red lips belong to?"

"Who stays in your heart?"

"Who reins it?"

"Who do those red lips belong to?"

It would be better if you keep
him away from such bad quality alcohol.

It is very dangerous for his heart.

Is everything alright, doctor?

Yes, all the other reports are normal.

He will get discharged by evening.

Okay, good luck.

I don't know what she applies on her lip

She's a "poison damsel".

What are you blabbering mom?

Heed my advice, Bhanu.

These Bengali people do
black magic to control people.

She has done black magic on your father.

How can you believe in such things, mom?

Then what should I believe in?

That your father had locally brewed alco
because he wanted to be adventurous?

Do you want me to believe that?

Mom, why don't you change the topic?

This is serious, okay?

Pammi auntie also did this
to get her mother-in-law killed.

Let me call her up.

She will tell me what needs to be done.

Please stop this rubbish.

You too shout at me!

Go ahead and shout!

Nobody's with me.

Mom, please.

Look at me.

Don't I look sexy anymore?

Don't I look nice anymore?

This morning when I came to hospital...

...all the doctors were flirting with me

But your father keeps flirting with her.

Mom, it's okay.

It's not okay.

- Mom?
- You know how alone I feel?

It's going to be okay.

Nothing... how will it be okay?

"These red lips belong to you."

It is a very important step, brother.

No love story is complete without it.

No, no, no.
No, no, no.

Why are you making such noises?
Are you gay?

No, no, no.

Stop, stop, stop. Don't move.

No, no, no.

This is what's known as surgical strike.

You didn't even realise
and the work was done.

Write it down.

Go ahead.

I write in blood,
don't assume it to be water.

I speak the truth,
don't assume it to be a story.

Wonderful, wonderful.

You want me to write that as well?

It provides some appreciation.

Dad, if she wants to
try again then you should too.

Who knows the fire might reignite?

Bhanu, she will burn me alive.

Then you'll have to extinguish the fire.

I'm not that violent.


You should be declared a terrorist.

You see that, Bhanu?

Papa, try it just once.

I cannot stay with her.

There is some problem.

What is the problem?
Tell me.

I don't find you to be desirable.

- What?
- Yes.

Take your face out in the market...

...then you know will
learn how desirable I am.


When I move out wearing
high heels and a red lipstick...

...people tease me
with fire brigade sirens.

And you say that I am...

Mummy can sleep with me in my room.

- It's okay?
- No.

I cannot do it.

Dear, I had told you.

What had you told me, dad?

Forget Bhanu, and talk to me.

Again the same thing?
You have started the same thing...


Darling, please help.

Oh, Moon.

Excuse me.

Don't give her a penny.

Just give her a divorce.

She is back to stay with us, Moon.

- What?
- Yes.

She has come prepared, mom.

Whose room will she
stay in if you stay in mine?

Papa's bedroom?

Wait, I'll just put her back in her plac

Throw this woman out of this house.

Black magician!

But I don't do magic shows.

But you do magic.


Don't enter my house ever again!
Stay with your lover.

Let me see for how
many days he will keep you.

Buzz off.

- Vijay!
- I'm leaving the old hag behind.

Papa, are you alright?

My ex-boyfriend.

Darling, I cannot leave now.

- I have left everything for you.
- You liar, he must have left you.

Your previous three
boyfriends too have left you.

- Vijay?
- Me?

- Nobody leaves me.
- Mom, aunt, please stop fighting.

- What are you saying?
- Mom, will papa be alright?

I'll handle this, dear.

- You go.
- Moon, Moon...

Let him go.
He said he would stay with Moon.


I'm done.

What's done?

I'm screwed.

Screwed how?

I'm pregnant, stupid!

Oh shit!

I'm in deep shit.

Come quickly,
we need to go to Goa, to meet my sister.

I cannot come.

There is a big mess over here.

My life is all messed
up and you are acting selfish?

Look, I am not going anywhere without yo

Do you understand?

Oh shit!
Stop it!

You have turned this house into a jungle

Whoever wants is welcomed to stay here.

I cannot stay in this house anymore.

I am going.


Bhanu, please.

- Darling?
- Bhanu.

- Bhanu, I am okay.
- Darling.

Lord Hanuman,
I have even donated my blood.

At least now, let me get my love.


Brother, it seems like
Lord Hanuman heard your prayers.

Sister-in-law is coming this way.

Sister-in-law, stop!
Come here, brother.

You scoundrel...!

No, Ms. Bhanu. Don't kill, don't kill.
He is my friend.


He is your friend?

Yes, yes.

He's not a goon. He is a good boy.

Actually, I wanted to thank you.



Thank you for helping me that night.

You are very nice, Rajiv.

You are very cute.

Show it to her.

Brother has mixed his sweat
and blood and wrote something for you.

Show it to her.

Will you come after
the baby starts kicking?


We missed the bus because of you.

Wait, she is talking to someone.

Now should I spend money
on taxi or on an abortion?

- Leave it.
- I'll arrange for a taxi.

Please don't worry.

- Please don't get upset.
- Can I take you somewhere?

- You have a car?
- Yes.

I don't think she will forgive you.

Then pull up a trick, hippo.

Don't say that she won't forgive me.

There is a trick, bro.


We will need to ambush
the girl in college.

Yes, because she doesn't
use Facebook or Twitter.

Then how will he follow her?

What the fuck! Bro!


It's the same monkey who had
ruined our bet outside Bhanu's house.

What is Bhanu doing with that bonehead?

We are discussing something
private so we need your ears covered.

- Okay?
- Oh girl talk. Put it on.

This knucklehead doesn't
know anything, does he?

Of course not.


Hey Neil, listen.

Did something happen that day?

I mean you didn't slip, right?

No, not possible.

You know, I always take precautions.

So, when do we meet up?

Asshole Number Two.


Shrey, that day in the toilet,
you used protection, right?

Of course.

You know that I buy in bulk.

There is no chance of missing one.

So tell me, where have you
been since the last three days?

Not him either.

What will we do now?

"The child You shall produce,
O Goddess..."

"Will grow up to do great things,
O Goddess."

"You are bountiful, O Goddess."

"Everyone else is pauper, O Goddess."

Will you shut up? The great poet!

"Everyone else is pauper, O Goddess."

"O Goddess..."

Can you keep quiet for sometime?

I cannot hear anything.
I cannot sing anything.

I have become a mummy.

Just shut up!

If you utter ma, mummy, mother or mom...

...then I will bury you right away.

I meant the Mummy Return kind of a mummy

Shut up!

I keep calling Bhanu.
Why isn't she picking up her phone?

I am getting worried.

Why are you being a
crocodile for no reason?

These aren't crocodile tears.

I'm really sad.

It's my daughter who has gone missing.

She would have called
me mom if you hadn't come back.

Even if she is dead,
she won't call you mom.

Darling, see what kind of a mother she i

She wants to kill Bhanu.

Good that you left her.

What nonsense are you
talking sitting in my house?

You didn't bring this house in dowry.

My father paid for the
construction of this house.

Please stop fighting, the two of you.

I'll find a solution.

How will you find a solution when
you cannot find a way to kick her out.

"He'll find a solution."

Oh I see.

I cannot do anything?

You are right. You cannot do anything.

Nothing at all.

1.06 minutes.

That too under pressure.

Oh, my genius.

- It's okay.
- What?

What's there to think so much, bro?

I'm thinking that the girl
too could have ended in the hospital...

...because of my stupid mistake.

But she did end up there,
to meet her father.


Idiot, use your brains at least sometime

Is he out of his mind?

Let me explain it to him.

You see, he has started liking her. Okay

Hey illegitimate children
of character actors... will know how it feels likes
when your father ends up in the hospital

I swear, I am waiting for that day.

My father doesn't even
let me add butter to the bread.

- He's such a scoundrel.
- He says first earn then eat.

- That's what he tells me.
- Don't put your family drama into this.

I am asking you to find
a way to apologise to Bhanu.

Do you understand?

The way she slapped you,
I don't think she will forgive him.

I don't think so too.

Want to bet?



Here, I'll go first.

I'll bet 500.

500 bucks, man?

Put it in.

Bro, I found her location.

Both the girls are in Goa.


You are here.

- Hi, sis!
- Bhanu!

I missed you so much.

Oh, my God! I am so happy to see you.

- Come on in guys.
- I am here as well, you know?

Bhanu, Rajiv.

Rajiv, Lord Hanuman.

Ms. Bhanu, Rajiv.

Rajiv, Lord Hanuman.

Lord Hanuman agrees.
Ms. Bhanu agrees.

I too agree.
We all agree.

So, do you know who the father is?

If I knew,
I'd first go and break his bones.

And then I would have come here.

Now, I'll have to spend
all my savings for this abortion.

Don't worry.

I know people at the hospital.

Everything will be set.

She ran away?

Someone made her elope?

Or was she kidnapped?

Sir, I am sure he sweet-talked
her into going with him.

But he was saying that the
boy was your girl's boyfriend.

- He's a...
- Okay, okay.

I mean he doesn't know anything, sir.

The boy was on a trial run.

Excuse me, what do you mean by this?

I don't know anything?

Do I look like a fool?

you tell me, do I look like a fool?

Now how can I tell?

It is not necessary that
a person is like he looks.


See his judgement.

they have only gone out on a short trip.

Now you will trust me.

One second.

I will show you something.

See, 1.05 minutes and 10 mistakes.

You see?

1.04 minutes and 10 mistakes.

Oh, my God, you are a genius.

Thank you.

Fill up this form.

The child's father signs
here and you sign here.

Wait a second, doctor.

According to the law, the child's
father's signature is not necessary.

Oh, I see.
Now you will teach me law, madam?

Both the government and
the law belong to us here.

And this is not just your child, is he?

Someone else too has a right over it.

Let me know when you find the father.


What is she saying?

- I am so sorry.
- What happened?

What's going on, Raju?

Madam, all the doctors have
changed after the government changed.

Now no matter where you go,
even bribery won't help.

Come on, man.

This child keeps growing in my womb.

Now from where will I get the father?

I am so sorry.

Just give me some time.
I'll think of something.

These boys couldn't find anyone
else other than me to play this prank?

I don't know who did this prank.


Shall we request Rajiv?

Have you seen his face?

He looks like a worn out toilet slippers

He can't be the father.

How selfish, Rukul.

There was a time when you
wanted me make him my boyfriend.

You didn't think about all this back the

There's a draught in your life, not mine
You're the virgin, I am not.

Oh I see.

But the tables have turned now.

You are pregnant, I am not.

Are you both mad?

Is this the time to fight?

And Rajiv is a very bad option.

He knows all your college friends.

Everyone will know that Rukul is pregnan


Oh shit, shit.

Tell me, left or right.

- Left.
- Don't get too close.

It's showing.

Sir, your tracking system,
it does track the phone correctly, right

No, I am asking because
it is government thing.

Madam, I am going to go Goa
with all of you for a meagre sum...

...that too in my own car.

I would make double if I had stayed here

Why do you need a father?

And why do you want to kill the baby?

It hasn't even seen the world.

And what will the society say?


Shonali, we have been
friends since 10 years.

Your parents are no more.

And since when did the two of
you start worrying about the society?

Such fear for the society?

What are you trying to say?

What I am saying is
that it is not a child.

Baby, it's a gift.

It's a tiny living being.

And you don't need
a father for his parenting.

You can do this on your own.

Look at me.
Look at me.

I am also a single father.

Yes, I too adopted
a child not so long ago.

When I can do it,
why can't you be a single mom?

It's a gift.
It's a divine gift.

You should cherish it.




Close this topic.

And we are going to the party!


- Ice cream?
- Let's go.

I'll take you some place
cooler than an ice cream.

Come on.

Let's go.

"Ice cream!"

Ms. Bhanu?

Ms. Bhanu?

- Where to?
- Bhanu.

Only for couples.

- Here.
- Buzz off.

- Get lost.
- I said, leave!

- Go!
- Hey!

'You have found your prey, Bhanu.'

'There is an opportunity
as well as an occasion.'

'You are here and so is the monkey.'

'Charge, Bhanu. Charge!'


- Look ahead.
- Where?

Look straight ahead. It's Bhanu.

Go and apologise to her.

- Huh?
- Go and apologise to her.


Go, bro!

Look over there.

Inspector, he is over there.

Stop the car.
Stop the car.

Enjoying grams, huh, you scoundrel?

Yes, he is the man.
It is him.

Where's the girl?
Tell me, where's the girl!

Even boys like you have
started flirting with girls now?

Hail Three Ram!

Hail Three Ram?

- Hail three Ram!
- Hail Lord Ram!

- Hail three Ram!
- Hail Lord Ram!

No, it's Hail Lord Ram!

- Hail three Ram!
- Say, Hail Lord Ram

- Hail Lord Ram!
- Hail Lord Ram!

Tell me where the girl is.

Tell me.


- Bhanu!
- Bhanu!


Oh, my baby. Where are you?

Like I had said, I'll get the girl back.

- Oh really?
- I got her back.

My baby...

- My turn...
- Not to do this again.

Do whatever you want, my child.

But not like this.


Do you understand?

What plans did you have with this girl?



Lift your head up, bro.

It's not like a bee will
bite you if you lift your head up.

Don't act like a shy bride
who refuses to show her face.

Doesn't your father say,
live with your head held high?


You didn't cry so much when
the teacher had turned your ass red.

Even a mute isn't this quiet, man.

Will you say something, bro?

Say something, bro.

Say something at least.

I am in love.

He's done for.

He's a goner.

He's screwed.

I'll get another one.

Have you seen my face?

I shine so bright that even
the Kohinoor diamond gets jealous.

Boys don't stand a chance against it.

Tell me, what does a man do anyway?

Puts the bun the oven,
whispers a few cusses...

...and comes back home
at night begging for food.

And when you ask him to perform,
he cannot.

But it at least completes
the nature's cycle.

Call it reverse cycle.

Coal makes diamond, right?

He gets married to a
girl who is like a diamond...

...and turns her back
into coal within one year.


I have decided that I
won't get an abortion done.

I am keeping this child.

And why shouldn't I? I am well educated.
I can earn money on my own.

I can be a single mother.
And it's my bloody decision, damn it!

You are pregnant?

Yes, I am. So?

Do you also want to
know the father's name?

The father's name is Rukul Preet Singh.

Bhanu, I'll bring this child so well tha
no one will ask for his father's name.

Hey kiddo!

Look Bhanu, marriage is the worst option

Marriage only gives you kids and worries

I am anyway getting a kid.

And if you want worries
then keep a diseased dog instead.

Bhanu, trust me, we will have fun.

We will stay together.
Single, happy, free.

Don't get married.


- Yes? What?
- Your pack has dried.


Okay, I am hanging up.
Listen, men are shit, shit is marriage.

Okay, bye-bye.
See you, bye.

What will you have?

In fact, what will you drink?

- What will you drink?
- Lemon soda?


Paneer Tikka.

What was so important that
you made me miss my kitty party?

Mom, it's the question of my life.

Question of your life?

Do you want to do MBA, dear?

There isn't just one question
of everyone's life, okay?

Mom please, I didn't ask
you two to come here for this.

I asked you two to come to a
restaurant so that you two don't fight.

Dear, I keep quiet as usual.
You know that.

- She is the one who explodes...
- You and keep quiet?

Quiet? Why?
What do you mean?

You know everyone in school
used to call me Quietie.

Hey Quietie!

I used to stay so quiet, madam...

...that once a teacher had to
use a stick to force my mouth open.

- Dad, please.
- No, my baby.


Let's go.

It's no one, just your ex.

Like I said,
no one can stay long with your father.

Look at the live example.

It's not like Anarkali
stayed with Salim for long.

Oh please, do you think you are Salim?

Look at yourself.

Excuse me,
I am not interested in being Salim.

Hail Lord Ram.

You see that, Bhanu?
This man changes the topic so drasticall

So what happened?
What happened?

My words have such a high reach
that they can go anywhere, madam.

By the way, what is your problem?

Look at this.

This man is still stuck on this.

Not to do this.
It requires mind.

Do you guys even have some
interest in my life or not?

My child...

Do you even know what am I going through

- What happened?
- What happened?

You are busy making records.

And mom, you are busy living your life.

Have you ever thought about me?

Papa too was lucky
enough to have a love life.

Even if only for some time.

But what about me?

I want to get married.



It's my final decision.



You know I too could
have been an astrologer.

In fact, I was so good in studies
that I raced ahead of everyone.

So, I didn't need
to get into such a field.

Look, I am here to talk to
you about the boy. Do you understand?

Priest, I want the boy
to be just like I had described.

Basically, the one without
culture is like a vulture.

But what about the signs in the horoscop

What signs?

Her horoscope depicts carnal deprivation


It means your daughter Bhanupriya...

...shall forever be deprived
of the pleasures of love.

She will never be able
to have a union with her beloved.

Are you trying to show
me how good you are in Hindi?

Just... dear?

Look, if you want to
get your daughter married...

...then you'll have to
get her married to a boy...

...who has similar signs in his horoscop

Only then, will a happy union is possibl

Otherwise, forget about it.

According to the planetary position,
the signs are...

These signs are beyond my comprehension.

I told you what kind of a boy I require.

Now if you don't do as
I said then you've had it.

I'll have Joshi separated
from your Vedant.

But you should also take
the signs into consideration.

What signs?

- Try to understand.
- Why are you insisting on it?

Priest, he was going to write
your name on the suicide note.

Priest, we stopped
him with great difficulty.

Priest, his love is at stake.

- Please do something.
- Please do something.

But you don't know anything
about her horoscope.

Priest, you don't know the
power of Gandhiji's horoscope.

Here you go, sir.

Look how breezy it is, sir.

- It is quite breezy!
- It is, isn't it?

- It is. It is.
- It is.

Now you won't say anything.

- Take this.
- Take it, sir.

Close your fist.
That's it.

Madam, I suggest you should meet the boy

You will be in awe.

He's a gem of a person.

Priest, I think it would
be better if Bhanu's father and I... the boy separately.

But mom, how can we do this without papa

Good that you interrupted her, Bhanu.

Bhanu too understands that you cannot
check the boy's intelligence without me.

Let it be.
You are talking about intelligence?

Oh really?

I... I am not intelligent?

- Papa, please.
- Just a second, dear.

- Let me tell her.
- Sorry, papa.

Sir, you should introduce them to him.

I don't have any problem
if they give him their consent.

How can it not be a problem?

First of all, you are getting married...

...and that too to a
person you don't even know.

What if his cigarette
has no tobacco in it?

Then you'll beg me to adopt my child.

You know how unfortunate I am.

Now let things happen as they are.

Anyway, mom likes him.

Your mom had liked your father too.


I am worried about you.

What's the harm in meeting him once?

I'm sorry that I came
here in such urgency...

I am surprised that we didn't
even meet once before the wedding.

I don't know why you are doing this...

...but I am doing this
because I have realised that... matter whom I love in my life,
it is God who pairs us up.

I also want to confess that
you aren't the first boy in my life.

What is she saying?

I already had a boyfriend.

And I was deeply in love with him too.

But my love lost before his bet.

I cannot promise that I'll forget him.

But I can surely promise that
I will forever be your loyal wife.


Why aren't you saying anything?

What kind of a joke is this?

I am Abhimanyu.

Shartiya, don't play with my life.

I am Abhimanyu.


Let go of my hand.
Let go of my hand!

Look, now you are the one
asking me to let go of love.

What were you saying?

That God pairs us up?

Then our horoscopes too
matched for a reason, right?

For which bet are you doing all this now

I am not beating around the bush.

I am coming straight to the point.

I love you.

Your "I love you" comes with no guarante

Let go of my hand.

There is no guarantee of life either.


But I can guarantee you one thing.

Of giving you a smile every morning...

...and taking a smile from you.

I see God in you.

My beloved, what should I do?

My head bows down in worship.

My beloved, what should I do?

I am sorry.

"It's the wedding night."
"Everyone's delighted."

"Look at the bride's face,
it shines bright."

"Apply some kohl to keep the evil away."

"Apply some kohl to keep the evil away."

"Looking at my catwalk, hearts slip away

"I am fearless and naughty."

"My plait too is flirty."

"When I swirl the party comes to life."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

Why are you dancing?
She's marrying someone else.

Ms. Bhanu's body's marrying someone else

Her soul belongs to me.

"Play an upbeat song
and feel the sensation."

"Play an upbeat song
and feel the sensation."

"Raise the temperature
and I'll shake the nation."

"I'm talked about on Instagram."

"Everyone lusts over me."

"I'll do some fancy moves
and get everyone into the mood."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

"Cuter than cutie."
"I have a million dollar smile."

"Cuter than cutie."
"I have a million dollar smile."

"I am number one beauty."
"I have a Desi style."

"My look is romantic."
"Everyone thinks it's fantastic."

"Look at the bride dance
wearing gold earrings."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance..."

"When I dance on beat,
I am hard to resist."

Did you look at my necklace?
I got it especially designed.

Mrs. Dimple, where's the groom?
Have you seen him anywhere?


The auspicious hour is passing away.

I don't know where he is.

He must be around, with his friends.

- I'll go call him.
- No, thank you.

I'll find him. You wait here.

Come, sit with us for a while.

- I'll be right back. Wait here.
- Okay, okay.

- Let's go.
- Yes, let's go.

Do I look good?


You are soon about to break your fast.

You are in love.
You are getting married.

Now just rock his world.

What should I rock, Rukul?

Do you still need to ask?

Did you forget everything
I had taught you?

You are just...

Bhanu, have you seen Abhimanyu?


I don't know where
this boy has disappeared.

The auspicious hour for the
wedding is passing away and he...

Anyway, it's okay. I'll go find him.

He is Shartiya.

He has never lost a bet.

He's a dog.

First, he schemed and
planned to apologise to Bhanu.

Bhanu fell for it and forgave him.

He even convinced her to marry him.

I am sure he's a devil's spawn.

No matter how scoundrel he is,
but he loves her.

Yes, he does.

Well... I think he ran away.

You cannot rock the world
when someone shocks your world.

It's okay.
Don't cry.

We'll figure out something.

Sir, the auspicious hour is passing away

Call the bride so that we
can start the wedding ceremony.

Sir, are you paying attention?


Go and call Bhanu.


Go and call Bhanu.

Be careful.

What happened?
What is it?

- Go and call Bhanu. Go.
- Okay, okay, okay.

Please you do take care of this.
He'll be right back.


Hail Lord Ram.

I thought that God does not walk on Eart

You are a God.

Shut up.

From where will you get
a Sherwani (wedding dress)?


I'll arrange for one, goddess.

Fine, I'll handle the rest.

Bhanu, dear, why are you sitting here?

Let's go.
Everyone is waiting for you.

Let's go, dear.

My baby.

Again the same thing?

Doesn't this scene come
after the wedding, dear?

Why are you doing this now?

Come on, the auspicious
hour is passing away, dear.

No, papa.

Everything will be a mess, dear.

Come, come.
I will not listen.

There is a set auspicious timing.

Will I be able to impress everyone?

Of course, you will.

You have your love and Lord with you.
Nobody can stop you now, brother.

Expect an explosion now!

- Really?
- Yeah.

All daughters need
to get married eventually.

It's not like you are going too far away

I'll keep visiting you.

- The auspicious hour is passing away.
- He needs to start the ceremony.

Remove your shoes.

Take a seat, dear.

- Careful.
- Sit down.

You are finally here.

I went to take a dump
and people started panicking.

What happened?
Why are you staring at me?

Don't I look sexy?

What are you doing?


Begin the ceremony, sir.

Why do you look angry?

You can hit him later.

Bride and groom,
please stand to exchange garlands.

Will I ever get married?

Never, if you move around in a turban.

Come on.

You're looking hot.

Take this, son.

You too take one.

Hold this.

First, the bride will garland the groom.



It's done. It's done.

Stop with the makeup, you are doomed.

Come on, hurry up.
Hurry up, she's gone.

Move aside.

Now for the next three vows,
the bride will walk ahead of the groom.

Come on, dear.

I'll go to sleep once their
bedroom's light is switched off.


What? Where? What are you looking at?

I've noticed that this
fatso has been staring at me.


Let me take this to the climax right awa

She won't give you any.

"Move the veil."

"Show me the beautiful face."

"I am someone who loves you."

"I am no stranger."

"I am crazy about you."

"I am no stranger."

Oh my!

Knock, knock.

Who is it?

Your Iron Man.

Let me look at your face, ma'am.

Show me your eyes.

What happened?

Well... just give me a minute.

Excuse me for a minute.
I'll be right back.

I'll be back in jiffy.

Oh no.

Is the deed done?

He went to the washroom.

Did these knuckleheads
give him too many beers?

They smile like boneheads too.

It will happen.
Just chill.


What are you doing, man?

I just got married.
Don't disappoint me.

What will she think about me?

Aren't you my darling little brother?

Aren't you my little brother, huh?

You remember we used to
play together since childhood?



Is everything alright?

Yes, everything is alright.

Cause havoc!

That's it.

Mr. Abhimanyu, you bribed
me to make the desired horoscope.

But I also have your
original horoscope with me.

Don't mind me saying
this but according to this... would be better if you seek a doct
advice before consummating your marriage

There are signs of cavernous dysfunction

I mean there will be a feast
but you won't be able to enjoy it.

Cause havoc!
That's it.

Like sparrows fly.
Crows fly.

Elephants fly.

Today, you too have to fly.