Vicky Donor (2012) Movie Script

You were saying that

this time it will be done.

This is a good

business you have made.

Since last two years I am

taking treatment from you.

Bhatia sir I

understand your feelings.

But didn't you only select

the donor after checking...

...the photo and other details.

I am just a doctor and not God.

We tried, but it

didn't work, what do I do?

Doctor it's been 8 years since

she's been keeping all fasts...

and hasn't left out any temple...

...mosque or any saint and now

your telling us "what to do".

I will get it printed in the Times

that you are cheating the people.

Bhatia sir you cool down...

have water. Don't take stress.

If not today then tomorrow,

she will definitely conceive.

What is Dr.

Chaddha sitting here for?

Now look at this and understand.

This is the female organ...

See this is uterus here

somewhere here is the egg.

The sperm and the egg must meet.

Here the sperm travels,

travels and meets here...

...hits here and

then baby is conceived.

Some sperms penetrate,

some bounce back.

In your case this

meeting is not happening

Then make it meet.

If we don't have a child, my

brother will takeaway my business.

He is a big rascal.

Lets take god's

name and try once more

Well fine, as it is it's been 2

years, might as well try once again.

But this time we need a good

quality sperm. - Definitely.

But this is the final try.

Come on... he said

he'll give us a good sperm

Come on...

Sir be prepared to put

these locks permanently.

The samples we have

are good for nothing.

Had even printed 3

ads in the newspaper...

...but not a single

reply worth considering.

Wretched sperm.

Chaman pick up the phone.

Dr. Chaddha's clinic.

I need to talk to Dr. Chaddha

He is in an emergency case. And will

call back, the moment he is free.

I wont spare that idiot

Tell that Dr. Chaddha of yours,

not to lie to me.

He has taken 30% advance from me...

Even after promising, he

hasn't given us a quality sperm.

You tell that fool

I'll hunt him down...

Now, why you are staring at me.

As if I have used the sample.

Chaddha sir get me the

sample of a cricketer.

Not only will he play for the

country but also mint money.

And if we have a sweet girl

then she can become a model

Don't you worry about the money.

We will load you with cash.

We will take very good care sir.

I get it.

You want a Dhoni and

you want an Aishwarya.

Yes, sir.

Then there's no worry what the

child will be when he grows up.

First decide his career and

then give birth to the child.

I will call you. Ok sir.

Thank you.

- Thank you.

God bless.

Aunty take 300 rupees.

What's the matter Dolly aunty?

This shade of lipstick is looking

very nice... its suiting you I say.

When it comes to good looks...

all we can do is take care...

...though the truth is that

with age we will lose it...

...anyways your mom's henna is due.

I'll let her know.

- Just clean it quickly.

By the way did Vicky find a

job or is he still as useless?

He will find one, you

needn't worry. - Okay.

And listen didn't your

engagement break sometime back?

Aren't your folks

looking for another guy?

I will tell you later on. Okay...

...loud mouth.

Oh god its already ten

and Vicky is still sleeping

My knees pain...

I feel like a maid in my own house...

take care of parlor... grand mom.

Oh Vicky

Vicky why don't you wake up.

How long are you going to sleep now?

Wonder why She doesn't let him sleep

A theft has taken place.

Where has the T. V gone.

Vicky

- What happened?

Vicky they have

taken the our T. V...

All the clothes also taken.

Were you sleeping like

Kumbhkaran (sleeping giant)...

...or did you eat an

entire pack of sleeping pills?

Every morning you get possessed

by some ghost or what? Move now...

grand mom we have been destroyed.

Stupid have taken away everything

Why are you abusing? There

is nothing that you can do

Shut up and what you are

seeing from there like monkey.

Let me see at least,

what are you doing?

We have been ruined grand mom.

...good that they stole

the TV coz if you had...

...to sell it to a trash picker...

...you wouldn't have got

more than one thousand.

Your all the old sarees

could've been used for this only

What are you smelling like a dog?

Looks like it was the black

underwear gang... just smell and see.

Go and lodge an FIR and find out

from the shop in Ambar Colony.

They might have sold the T.V. there.

Listen that Mr. Bhale is giving

1500 per month to the watchman...

...and whole night he

whistles outside his house.

Why don't you increase his fees?

Don't you dare talk

about the money to me.

God knows how many kilos of detergent

goes in washing yourjeans...

...and then who pays for

your shopping and...

...club expenses with your friends?

All I know is that if you

want to stay in this house...

...pay 5000 rupees every month...

and that's final.

Let me get the job once then

I will return all your money.

For God sake now don't

start the story of doing a job.

See the entire history so far...

no one has ever done job

in the family of Arora.

Here... take this

Umm... I will not keep quiet.

Why don't you take care of the

business along with your uncle.

You'll have to speak

English in the job.

And the expenses of the attire... I

am not going to give you a penny more

You are my mummy or my enemy.

Now where you are going with

the whisky. Won't you have tea.

Get me phenyl instead

I don't know anything. Now you

come to house after earning money

Vicky stop.

Now suffer because

of the pampering...

Obviously there is no trend of 'good'

morning in your father's house.

A robbery was to happen,

it happened...

The whole life has gone by

but I've never purchased...

...anything for my own self.

My small parlor income can't

take care of your expensive desires.

Wants to buy a flat TV...

What to do your

destiny is only not good...

listen, get me one more

cup of tea. It's too cold.

And as for TV, that I will

buy anyways... that too Sony.

What did you think that I am dog.

You'll sleep and I'll guard you.

I kept you for barking.

Lazy bum.

Listen. What is this.

Sirji you do your work.

What are you doing. This is my car.

Your car.

Then what. This is my car.

You keep you car. This is my dog.

You go with your dog.

This is my dog and I am tying.

What is your problem?

If it is yours then take

it some where else. - Why?

Munjal sir what happened.

Nareshji no one is

understanding the matter.

I was coming from the

market in the morning and...

...from market I went in the park.

I did exercise in the park.

What are you doing this.

You are just confusing us.

Munjal sir just clear the matter.

You are not understanding.

I am telling that I went in the

market and did exercise in the park.

When I came here

then seen that this boy

...was tying his dog

in front of my car.

Oh god why you are taking so much

time in explaining. - I'll tell you.

This is your house.

Ground floor is mine.

Ground floor is yours and car

is also yours. - This is my car.

Is it your dog.

This is not my dog.

You understand this.

- The same thing I am telling.

This is not my dog.

You understand this.

This is a Labradog.

See carefully it is Doberman.

My experience says it is labradog.

What is this

nuisance in the morning.

Now get lost from here.

You listen to me.

What are you doing?

Isn't he cute?

Listen... I was...

- Excuse me.

Isn't he cute?

You like it?

- Yes, very much. - What the price?

Sold the dog. Bye God

he is a heartless sperm.

Are you happy now?

Come on, let's go.

Some donor have come for interview.

Shall I send them.

Send

Sit.

I have 17 children.

You won't be able to do it...

You just give chance and see.

Hi Baldev.

Hi!

~ Hi!

Speak

Get me men's magazines please

Sir, Abhishek.

Can you do it.

What sir.

How much cash do you think

I will make out of this.

I stay in Noida... can do updown.

I can sing

I won't get money?

Latha.

- Yes sir.

Latha give me a crocin.

Okay, sir.

Chaman.

- Yes.

Lined up all the

world's losers for me.

Henceforth filter and then send.

Yes sir.

From tomorrow onwards you

start coming on my shop at Rajori.

You will learn the work in 5

- 6 months and...

...hen start your own work in

South Delhi. - That's right.

Yes How long will you be

wandering aimlessly here and there.

What's the problem?

You are the biggest problem.

All you do is sell clothes and you

will make Vicky also do the same.

What grand mom you are

also always cursing him.

What is wrong in his work.

- Again you started.

You always taunt

him about his work...

Uncle I won't sell your polka

dot clothes. I want to do a job.

There is respect in that.

And respect is what sets apart

business class from officer class.

I won't lift your shop

shutter up and down...

Vicky this is no way

to talk to elders.

Mummy I want respect.

Oh ya as if I have no respect...

We are irrespectable people...

for last 50 years I am

running 4 shops in Delhi

Brother... please

- And two are on rental.

Brother cool down.

He's a kid... - From where have

you bought these useless apples.

Oh

- Hey you listen to me.

I can hire and sack

fifty salesmen like you...

Vicky my son listen.

Grand mom its been fifty

years since I am working...

why don't you sometime

give some respect to me...

If you deserve then I

will give respect to you.

Grand mom when you give

only then I'll deserve.

No first you deserve and then take.

You are strange...

You will make me sell clothes.

Hey Vicky... listen...

You look handsome.

Please introduce to me also to...

What intro

Introduce me to that

girl in the parlour.

If mom comes to know

she'll give us a thrashing...

Vicky... c'mon... don't I always

help aunty with her parlor things...

Get me and intro please.

- Please...

Bloody despot...

Okay fine... looks like

you'll not help your friends...

Selfish creature...

Go away.

Come... have a seat

Speak.

- Yes.

Yes this is the bill for

the fees and auto charges.

Give these duplicate bills later...

First tell the matter.

His name is Vicky Arora

WOW you have WOH one CTOTG TUPGGS...

you idiot, I only told you that...

lam telling you. this is the

bill for the snacks that I ate.

He did B. Com. from

Bhagat Singh 53%...

...loves loitering

around with his friends.

Mother runs a parlour.

He himself knows all the work...

...of parlour like manicure...

pedicure etc...

Father is dead but it seems he

has left a lot of money behind.

Status on Face book is 'complicated'

but on Orkut it shows 'single'.

And the watchman was saying that...

...he probably has an affair

with Sweta, his neighbour...

His job application has been

rejected from 4-5 places...

...and is a

beloved of his grandma...

Listen my mood is off so If there is

something interesting then tell me.

Now should I make it up or what.

I told you the facts.

Yes his grand

father had 19 children.

Come again...

19 children. There were

four twins and 11 singles.

Last child took birth

in the age of 78 years.

At what age?

78 years.

Did you cross check?

There is record in corporation.

What is address.

Address is 6/124, Lajpat Nagar

- 4, New Delhi.

Dolly today it's not effecting.

Have you added more water?

Uhh you are drinking slowly.

But even I am not high yet.

Umm. Dolly I'll

tell you something...

I respect you a lot.

Grand mom let it be. By morning

you will forget all this respect...

...and be back to

cursing me and my destiny.

Don't feel bad as I speak

anything in the hangover.

But I didn't get a

single penny in your dowry...

...this hurts me till date...

...that's why I speak like that...

...grand mom this is wrong.

You know I have

given my whole life...

...and my beauty

parlour income to you.

I never served my own mother

as much as I have served you.

And you speak like this...

I know it.

And only you can take my tantrums...

...that's why I respect you...

but only if you had got

something for me from...

...your home when you got married...

it would have been nice...

when Vicky wife will

get nothing for you...

then you'll know how much it hurts

Uhh grand mom I told

you several times...

...not to take the

Vicky's name while drinking...

...I loose the high.

I don't know what he

will do in his life.

He is a good boy and one day he

will make our ARORA family famous.

Prepare one more.

Yes. First finish this one.

- No.

Hey you... blowing empty whistles.

- Yes sir.

How did the theft

happen when you were there?

Sir one round takes 15 minutes.

I am the watchman

and not the superman.

Yes sir what is the matter.

You are chasing me since morning.

I will dial the number 100

Please don't misunderstand me.

I am law abiding citizen.

I have to talk something private.

Talk. Its private only.

No not here. My car is there.

You are searching the in law.

Stop the car here.

Whatever you wish to speak,

speak fast.

Just I asked this casually.

Now you tell me about your hobbies.

Hobbies... nothing.

After seeing you I

understand that you are correct man.

Oh for what.

For some work.

Sirji I mean what you want from me.

Well what is your

opinion about the sex.

As much as I get is less.

I saw you and understood that

Ok ask me further.

Except this what do you do?

Sir what I am doing and

what I am not doing...

...where I am going,

what is your problem.

Stop the car here in the side.

I am feeling uncomfortable.

For every small thing

tell me to stop the car.

Anyway am Dr. Baldev Chaddha, M.D.

Infertility specialist.

Shake hand to me.

I had a small

infertility clinic in Dariaganj...

...for the treatment of the married

couple who don't have any issue.

Side by side I am

running a bank also.

For that I need a

special donor. Sperm donor.

What happen.

What so funny?

Sir this is the thing for donation.

What so funny about it?

$109 -

Why are you laughing?

Thank you sir for

dropping me home in the cold.

What's so funny about it?

Think about it... I

will pay you well.

Let it be thank you.

If he wasn't my neighbor, I

would have hit him with my sandal...

You beat him and see. I

will cut your water pipeline.

Then we'll see how

you wash your henna.

...lndian Idol wannabe...

No grand mom you don't be angry.

I was just joking.

Here Vicky have this...

I said thank you Pepsi aunty.

Hello Dolly Beauty Parlour.

Yes just hold on. I am calling.

Vicky your phone.

- Coming mummy.

Come quickly.

- Yes.

Yes hello Vicky here.

You... this is the limit...

you've like entered my house...

No thank you sir. Now next

time don't try to call me again.

Wrong number.

Nowadays too wrong number

phones are coming for you.

Vicky listen.

Yes what?

This is parlour's money, go and

deposit it in the cooperative bank.

No mummy

No ya mom... your bank is dated...

it has no reputation...

not even an ATM...

Don't fuss around... we've had an

account in the bank since partition.

I am going... but to

open a new account.

Vicky please don't

create a new problem.

Sure. Sure.

Yeah, just give me

like one hour. Okay?

Excuse me.

Ma'am I want to open an account.

And here is the money.

Have you come for the

first time in the bank?

Yes.

Well, sir that's not how

the accounts are opened.

Fill up the form and take

a token from that counter.

You can come back as

your number comes.

But Ma'am there is

no one in the queue.

Sir these are bank rules. Please.

Weird rules I say.

Sir your money.

Thank you, sister.

Thank you so much.

Ashima lunch

Come on, let's go.

Ma'am you are going half day.

I got the token also and we

will fill up the form also.

Its lunch hour sir.

I have to go.

Till then you sign on the bottom.

3 passport photos and

some one to introduce you.

Why others. I can

introduce myself...

Myself Vicky Arora

and you are Ashima Roy.

Oh you are a Bengali?

Yes I am not Punjabi.

You bring some one else who

has an account in this bank...

...and can introduce you.

Okay.

Shall we?

Ashima, he is

Varun's friend. - What?

Sir.

Now what?

Fifth?

The clinic is suffering losses and you

are producing one after another...

I have already offered

you but you always say no.

Shut up. There is something called

the family back ground of sperm.

Duffer sperm!

Cancel all my appointments.

Madam how is it fault if

I have had a fifth child?

Here, you have...

I thought you'd be a decent

guy since you're a doctor.

By God you really have a dirty mind.

Very awkward. What is dirty in that?

You are asking youngsters to

do such type of cheap work...

Do you even know what

you are talking about?

I have good respect and

my patients worship me

It makes no difference to me.

Keep your respect at home...

doesn't matter to me...

I hate kids

But why?

Have you ever smelled them?

There is so much foul smell.

Of urine... of potty... and

when they vomit doing wuack...

I don't want to have kids...

Who is telling you to

give birth to a child?

When it is my sperm then

won't the child be mine?

Only your sperm will be used.

Talk softly... the

shop owner knows me...

Sorry, sorry.

Ya ya I've got it all packed...

now please keep the phone...

Now what I was saying was that...

only the sperm will be yours

...but the responsibility of

the children will not be yours...

Neither the susu nor the potty...

In any case it is going waste.

Become a donor, at least

some one will be benefited.

No how do you know

that it is going waste.

And as it is it gets wasted only...

Shall I store it in a

syntax tank overhead or what

Don't store in the

tank but store with me.

I will give you money also for that.

Sir why are you

getting me trapped into...

lam trapping you?

The real trapping is what the

people in cities face these days.

This infertility is the

cancer of modern life.

I don't want to listen.

My dear this is the problem of

insecure and highly ambitious people.

See the routine life.

Sitting late in the office then

fighting the traffic return home...

...taking drink and

again working on the laptop.

And finally telling your wife

that darling I am too tired.

There married life becomes hell...

One's left unable to

do the real work...

On the other hand

are our villagers...

their touch is enough

to make a woman conceive

Do you know the root cause

of this problem... ask me what

what...

- Stress

What?

Stress.

- Stress.

The sperm count becomes low

as the stress goes higher.

You and the village...

same to same... copy... ditto

lucky... happy... and

stress free... highly fertile...

...help me please

you've come back to your purpose...

I don't want to do

this social service.

Okay, I agree to you.

But what is the guarantee

that there will be child.

No there is no guarantee...

No guarantee.

But this will be known...

...whether you are capable to

give birth to a child or not.

Stop the car.

- Yes.

I said stop the car.

- One minute what happened?

Stop the car.

What happened?

Hello!

How could you say it...

that I am not fit for that...

I cannot give birth to a child?

Don't misunderstand me.

Misunderstanding... my foot...

Now dare you call me ever again...

Listen to me.

Who are you to talk

such crap about me?

Don't misunderstand me.

Sorry dear

I'm telling you... I can

give birth to as many kids...

That is exactly why I came to you.

Heights of being a pile on ya...

Now what are you doing here?

Drinking affects the

strength of the sperm...

Uhhhhh...

I haven't said yes to you as yet...

But you haven't said no either...

Understand my problem.

Will you have cold coffee?

Can I drop you somewhere?

See Vicky I am not pressurizing you.

but please understand my situation...

Can we talk in the evening. Ok.

Shall I wait.

What time, what time in the evening?

There is one link.

My cousin's brother in

law works with the RBI.

Sorry sir, not possible.

I think I'll now have to

find a source in the ministry

Not even then sir

There must be some way out.

I don't know anyone who

has an account with your bank

...does that mean I

can't get my account opened?

Sir I have already told you

I do not have the authority.

You could speak to

the Branch Manager.

I spoke to him

By the way Ashima, your

account is with this bank right?

Obviously

Lets, you and me become friends...

...and you give me a NOC...

my works done...

Sir I don't know you.

Care for some coffee

I'll get some connection...

see you...

Dr. Chaddha I really

gave it a serious thought

lam unemployed, sort

of good for nothing...

that doesn't mean I'd do

such kind of silly work...

So my final decision is a NO!

Do you believe in God.

Almost

Then, for god's sake say yes

See if I don't get a donor like

you, my clinic will get ruined...

the competition is very tough...

...everything will get ruined...

Listen don't do this emotional talk.

Please go ahead and

catch some other party.

Thank you.

What are you saying?

Here... things are getting

ruined and you're saying...

...I should speak to someone else...

It won't be that

easy to get someone else

So what do I care...

sit on the seat...

ls there only one guy

in the whole of Delhi.

...neither does he belong

to the Tatas or Birlas...

You're just wasting your time

behind him... for no reason...

There is...

There is... something in the boy

This one is of our south trip.

That time Vicky was 8 years old.

And this one... is when I was young

You don't look old now either.

Thank you.

Well...

- By the way I'm not that old...

...but when faced with increasing

responsibilities at a young age...

...the stress does come out on

the body and face. - Yes yes.

And this one is my husband's.

He died after this trip.

This is his last photo.

Doesn't he look a lot like Obama.

Yes yes... same to same...

just 2 shades fairer...

Whenever that chap comes on TV,

I leave all my work and sit...

It feels as if he has

taken a rebirth in America.

Oh Vicky you've come.

You didn't tell me that you are

starting a business with Chaddha sir.

You got quite late.

You were quite a naughty boy... have

come to know of your entire history...

But I didn't reveal

that thing, promise...

Shit man, by god, mom's swear,

you have crossed the limit

Relax, mummy will hear it

Please, don't touch me.

Do you know what a

big pile on you are?

See if you don't want

to do it, then don't.

But don't call me a pile on.

It hurts.

You only tell me...

Sir I am a common man.

I live in Lajpat

Nagar's refugee colony...

My mother is a widow.

If she, Pepsi aunty,

Sharma's, Bhalla's, Chopra's...

if they come to know that I do

such... meaning such kind of work...

...then I'll lose

all my respect...

you'll get me thrown

out of the colony.

See what I am trying to say is

that I am a certified MBBS doctor...

...and this work is legal.

Not from today but since

the times of the Mahabharata.

I can stand at India

Gate and announce that...

...its an ancient science...

when women couldn't have children,

they used to call Rishis...

Rishis used to give their

blessings... 'tatha asthu'...

...and there... done... it's a very

ancient science... what's wrong in it

And if you look at it from

a business point of view...

...then you can make money,

I can make money...

...my clinic will get saved...

rest is up to you...

Should I leave?

Good night.

- Good night.

Yes.

Yes, Dr. Chaddha had come in the

morning, he's very jocular by nature

Whiskey has come back... don't know

from where Dr. Chaddha got him from

Okay, mom.

The baby has to be matching with us.

We are very classy people...

...we want our baby to be

like us... refined... you know.

Absolutely aristocratic...

Not a problem. Just fill up

your requirements in the form.

Next week John

Abraham is coming to Delhi.

If he agrees, then

we'll make a deal with him.

Don't joke, Baldev.

Madam you are the one joking.

See it is my guarantee to

give you a healthy sperm...

...with a good hit rate.

But whether the baby will be well

behaved or naughty how I can tell?

You have a nice day.

- Thank you very much, Dr. Baldev.

Don't you think it

is a little bit funny?

Yeah, that's okay. Its alright.

Listen to me clearly.

Tell me.

I am doing this

only for pocket money.

There has been no change of heart

Okay.

I still hate children.

Got it.

Go there.

Latha.

- Yes sir...

Take his details.

Okay sir.

Name?

Vicky Arora.

Sex?

Male.

Age?

- 25.

Height? - 5'10

Come.

- You're coming with me?

Yes, sir. Come sir

There is the wash basin, and

here is the tissue paper...

...and here is the container.

In this, you may

throw it and store it...

Okay sir.

Done sir.

What happened?

Wouldn't happen like this...

No problem.

This is called performance

pressure in medical terms.

Everyone goes through it...

even cricketers before a game...

Don't get tensed.

Come with me.

Come come... inside here...

Lata!

Yes sir.

Thank you.

Sit... sit

Don't take stress. We have

a solution for everything.

Here, take this this Oh Boi...

Double X boys... Excite boys...

Triple X... and this

is wild ones... right...

All the best.

Play the DVD and put on the

headphones... all the best

Done?

Done sir.

Congratulations. Your first payment.

Balance will be paid to you

after completing the procedure.

Balance payment.

What I mean is that for the

next five to six months...

...this sample will be

tested in the lab...

...and if there is a meeting with the

egg then we shall pay you the balance.

As it is we have a done deal right

You just enjoy!

The spark plug is jammed

My destiny is doomed

Sharma's, Rowde's,

Bhalla's, all victims

Part of the guilty army

No more prayers, no more medicines

I am changing my style

Let all men take a hike

I have found the potent Chaddha

Chasing...

Chaddha is on the pursuit

Vicky you... now what...

You had told me that you will

meet me when I get myself a job.

So I came here first

Yeah?

Oh you are working now

Marketing?

- Yuck...

lam a sperm donor

Only sick people like you

can do this kind of work.

Next time don't show me

your face... Get lost.

He's modern's world's handyman

Going all around

with his sticky hands

Ashima.

Hello

Ashima

- Ashima

Ashima

- Ashima

Ashima

- Ashima

Heck!

Ashima

- Hello

...Is she your relative?

Brother I was helping you.

Keep your help with yourself,

and get out of here.

Seriously, the world just

does not appreciate decency...

And why should I go that way,

I'll go this way...

Get lost.

I am a sperm donor

- What?

Chaddha is on the pursuit

Couldn't you knock before entering

Why you are feeling shy?

Mummy papa have gone for a wedding.

I.T.O.

So you've come parading yourself,

to celebrate your honeymoon...

You get lost!

Now even if you call me,

I won't come...

...you know that Sunny and Bunty,

they're always running after me...

...and that Pitampura guy,

he's even bought a car...

I've got everyone

hanging just for you...

Who are you showing attitude to...

I've never stopped you...

Fine, I'm just warning you...

...that there's a whole cue of

boys waiting for me out there...

so don't be in this illusion

that you're the only one...

Shut the door...

I've to change my shirt

Ya ya no one's watching you...

bloody loser!

She thinks she is too smart.

I am coming, mother!

- Just go.

Hey Vicky... listen up brother...

Just go off to sleep man...

always butting in from behind

Listen Dimpy, from the parlour,

was giving me the look...

getting it ya...

You went to the parlour.

- Yes

Mum will take my case...

don't ever do that again.

Sorry, see you always

get the action bro...

...here I have a

genuine problem right...

Alright, listen, listen, Don't

introduce me, that's alright.

Get me from somewhere else then...

Who am I

Get me some action ya bro

- Here take mine...

You are forgetting your promise.

The love goddess will

never forgive you...

Oh Vicky!

Congratulations.

We met at the bank.

- Really

Get my account opened

How are you?

- Very good.

Hey... what's up

Hi!

Looking sweet.

Different... kind of cute

Thank you.

So, you're single.

How would you know?

Otherwise your boyfriend would

be sniffing around like a dog...

...guarding you...

- Excuse me.

I am an independent working

girl and not like other girls

I know.

Therefore don't even try.

Why, working girls

don't have affairs?

May be, but they definitely don't need

a boyfriend sniffing around them...

...at least I don't

Madam see... that depends...

...if you trap a simple,

decent dog...

I mean boyfriend like me... then

he is bound to sniff around...

lam trapping you... don't forget

you came here to speak to me...

don't forget...

Look... standing here alone...,

all dressed up...

...these are the

beginnings of setting the trap...

I didn't know that

I'd meet you here...

And if you would have known, you

wouldn't have come dressed up?

I wouldn't have come!

Hi.

You are back!!

No, am still stuck in traffic.

Didn't sleep yet...

Your dad would snore all night,

let out gas repeatedly...

I would fight that you

are not letting me sleep...

I would then come to

your room and sleep...

...and no sooner would I catch a

wink than he'd come & call me...

...would hold my

hand all night long...

...how do I suppose I'd

feel sleepy now all alone?

Shall I prepare a drink.

No, I'll go in just five

minutes and sleep down

By the way hundred percent we share

some higher connection between...

we keep bumping into each other...

first at the market,

then on the road...

...then at the sangeet...

quite unbelievable.

Remove the life out of the computer...

what're you so busy with...

...that you can't even

spare a minute to respond...

...there's this dude sitting

in front of you talking crap...

...at least respond...

Sir this is not my drawing room.

That I should

entertain you... it's a bank...

Give me your address,

drawing room, bedroom...

we could chat anywhere. even

I am quite uncomfortable here

Sorry.

Was telling you... to be seated

quietly... now you've broken it...

...give you one tight one...

Sir is that your son...

...yes he is my son.

No just think and be

sure that he is your son.

Yes he is my son.

Does anyone get his son to

the bank for an outing...

...its the worlds

most boring place...

...listen kid you carry on playing

He's come here so many times.

I know he is an over the

top guy, but he's cute.

Come on your single enjoy it.

Don't be a bore

EnjOY

What bore...

...why do you people feel that I

don't want to be in a relationship.

No listen. I have to be sure first.

Yes but at least meet

him once & as it is...

...who is asking you

to have sex with him.

Look at these marriage photos... both

of you are looking so cute together.

See this one.

Dr. Trehan any problem.

Ok let me call you back.

Whose sample is this?

Is everything ok.

Ok. more than ok.

I say unbelievable.

His sperm count is 100 million

and motility rate is very strong.

Outstanding.

Who is this?

Well, he's a foreigner...

So finally you found your Alexander

Dr. Trehan why are

you joking with me.

Hello Chaman give an

appointment to Bhatia.

Vicky!

- Yes

Some Chaman had come

by in the morning...

...and gave this sweet box...

...was saying

there's some good news.

When did he come.

He had come early in the morning

So how does it feel.

You've conceived for the

first time... that too twins...

lam shit sacred...

Meaning why the hell did

you send the laddoos home...

...henceforth am not telling

anyone that I am a sperm donor...

...the women are slapping me

while your making me eat laddoos

You know... women they're

just wired differently...

...god hasn't made such a

woman who can understand a man...

...but you don't feel

disappointed... it'll affect...

...and with such women... neither

waste your time nor your sperm...

...seriously your sperm

count is outstanding...

first time in my career...

lets give it another shot...

No sir the world is very mean.

If everyone comes to know... doing

nothing, am becoming a father...

And if your clients

spread the word...

...then mom will throw

me out of the house...

Why would the

clients spread the news.

There is confidentiality

clause in the contract

Sir may I say something, I did this

just once just to keep your word...

...now I don't want to

make a habit out of it...

No no make it a habit.

Idiotic.

Yes mummy.

Did you purchase a TV

What TV

Yes they've brought this LCD

LCD?

Yes.

Why aren't you speaking?

Where did you get the money from?

Ya... ya ya mom it's yours keep it.

Keep it inside please

Long live my Vicky.

Look Vicky if you've

touched my bank account...

...I am telling you...

don't increase my BP...

Ya mom I'll explain later

TV.

LCD!

LCD... and this is

just the beginning...

Bhatia has sent the LCD in

celebration of his twins.

Now you wait and watch

what all you'll get both...

...in cash and in kind...

...there is much to

enjoy for a sperm like you

What would be the cost of LCD

Fifty to sixty thousand.

Sir why don't you understand.

Technically I have

become a father...

...and it feels really strange

What feeling my dear

Just do what you feel like doing...

eat well, sleep well,

and dress well...

...don't take stress...

it'll affect your sperms

All the time sperm sperm. Cant

you ever think of anything else...

Listen listen...

I get like over a

thousand biodatas everyday...

...with people

applying to be sperm donors...

...ask Chaman if you wish to...

If you had so much

choice why did you select me.

Listen... sit... sit...

...call it 20 years

experience or 6th sense...

I can tell a good sperm just

by looking at a man's face...

You're taking my case...

See your report, its brilliant.

Such DNA belong only

to the true Aryans...

your a pure Aryan... you're

the son of an Aryan you bloody...

...you're the son of

an Aryan you bloody...

Confused sperm.

Listen

Have you ever heard

the name of Alexander.

Your DNA belongs to his family.

What are you talking.

Listen listen

Look... whets written here...

Map

. Map

What's written here...

The conquest of Alexander the Great

Look this is Macedonia,

Alexander's country...

from here he takes off...

continues continues...

reaches here Asia

Minor meaning Turkey...

from Turkey he takes off straight,

then left then again left and...

...then a right

and reaches Persia...

...after crossing Persia... and via

Hindukush he entered into INDIA...

...but before he reached INDIA...

he had many marriages...

...post marriage left

his soldiers behind...

Alexander's soldiers and

local women had sex...

...and married each other... and

had their children... understood...

...and you guys came here

only after the partition right?

And Lajpat nagar ls

full of refugees...

...you also are a refugee right...

so all this happened right there...

what I am trying to say is

that you are a pure Aryan race!

Don't believe me do you... look this

is history and this is science...

they both go along together...

parallel

I am a man of science

We can not go on together...

parallel...

...just drop me home please

Listen... the sperm count of

an Aryan is best in the world.

I get all types of

demands from overseas...

...sperm samples of Brad Pitt,

Shahrukh Khan, Lady Gaga, Beckham.

Clients demand the sperm

samples of such celebrities...

Now you please tell me where am

I to get their samples from...

...but since there is a

demand we would have to meet it

H OW?

You are there na...

You play cricket so

you are my Dhoni...

...handsome you already are,

so there is my Beckham...

you dance, sing well...

there you go - Lady Gaga...

and drama is inborn in us Indians...

so you become my Shahrukh...

...consumer is happy and

so is the manufacturer...

Sir increase my rate then...

Rascal.

Greedy sperm...

When this little flower

bud blooms into a plant

It blooms into a bud.

Hey, iPhone has come.

This is a 16GB one.

Dear, I had asked for a 32 GB one.

Cheers.

It blooms into a bud

And so does the demand for this...

...that and just about

everything that money can buy

Dolly Arora..

Didn't you say Rs.5,000

per month? This is 5,000..

From where did you get this money?

We want the best quality sperm

Don't worry about the money

We're getting demand

from foreign countries...

Give me cash. - Cash. - Cash.

I need a good

quality Indian sperm donor.

Cash. Give me cash.

Cash.

Mrs. Bhatia breathe...

Take a deep breath...

When this little plant

turns into a big tree

Turns into a big tree

The feeling takes over to

live big, in style and live free

And so does the demand for this...

...that and just about

everything that money can buy

As the wants are unlimited

and even bigger than the sky

lam late. I will try and

make it as soon as I can.

Auto.

What are you doing madam.

Delhi is not safe in night. Come.

First CR park please

So, how's work at the bank going...

...but you have quite

an interesting job...

...just sit back and

count others' cash...

Don't you get bored...

Meaning there isn't a single guy in

the bank whom you could check out...

I go there for work,

not to check out guy

As I told you, I am not interested.

That's the problem... just chill...

...take life lightly... else

you'll be frustrated all life long

Well, am I the

frustrated one or you...

You.

...who was checking out

those useless magazines.

O.K. so I did see those magazines...

but didn't buy a single one...

check if you wish to...

Please Take left in the street.

Here's your Bengali colony

Ashima...

...no bye... no thanks...

Am not that bad...

Good night.

Sir by the way you

could have done much.

Just take it to Lajpat Nagar

You're a smart chap...

Don't talk crap... lets go

This way.

Hi!

Hi I am sorry I got late...

too much traffic...

uhh should we order for lunch?

Obviously but I

thought you would not come.

Now that night you

dropped me at home safely

...didn't even take the money

for auto also, so one lunch is O.K.

I was going home

in the auto anyways.

Anyway where do you work.

What.

Where do you work.

I am looking for a job and for

time being I am in export import.

Of what?

Handicrafts

- Really!

Really my dad was

working in Handicraft Emporium.

I mean he is retired now

What happened, what so funny...

What happened, what's so funny...

so are you single

You want to confirm

before having an affair

No I am just asking you.

I hardly know you.

I don't want have

an affair with you.

Then how come

you've come for a date.

I just came.

It is not a date.

O.K. leave it.

Have I held you as yet

You always talk like this.

I talk like that also.

Ma'am, your order please.

There is a reason

- Bye.

For this restlessness

I like you

this I agree to

There is a reason

for this restlessness

I like you

this I agree to

There was once some disinterest

Hello.

Now I have found peace, limitless

Bye.

Let me be lost

- I am getting late.

Today no bank

Why... I never bunked

There is always a first day.

But why?

Yeah, tomorrow..

She is having a burger. Call later.

Daily bunk for one or

two hours... it'll help

It's time to love you

Let me be lost

Let me lose myself

Let me be lost

Let me lose myself

It's not the weather, it's the heart

You are unique, the rest is useless

You are unique

Let me be lost

Let me lose myself

Let me be lost

Panditji what happened?

Vicky Pepsi aunty was

asking me what you do.

I told her to ask you herself.

Whatever you all are planning,

send it out of boundary.

See my dear there is no hurry.

But one thing let me tell you...

...that I really think you and

Sweta look really sweet together

See son now you have

started earning, so get married.

Today your telling

me to get married...

...tomorrow you'll

tell me to have kids...

Right.

If its only about kids, then I

can have them today itself...

Vicky.

Why did you kiss me and all of that?

That night I was drunk, after

that have I ever touched you...

...put on your dupatta

Put on my dupatta...

Why're you ignoring me.

You were drunk

just that one night...

...what about the other nights.

What other nights. I

never touched you.

Did lever stop you.

See the door is open,

somebody could see us...

what are you doing...

get away from me

Look if you don't want to

do marriage now then O.K.

I will convince to mummy, but don't

break our relationship in this way...

What relationship...

I have already told you that

we are just childhood friends

don't raise false hopes...

So you do all that with a friend

that one should do with a girlfriend.

Aren't you feeling anything...

...just troubling me aren't you...

or you've found somebody else...

There's no one else...

...and even If there is why should

I tell you... bloody pile on...

Hooo... when that you've

done everything with me...

...I've become a pile on

I even given you all

my pocket money...

now you give me back all my money

There... shown your real self...

Bloody typical C block mentality...

here take this...

...here here take all your money...

haven't even counted it

I will take my money and

now you see... what I do...

I will tell everything to aunty...

open up all your secrets

What you will tell.

Yes I know everything

about you and the doctor...

I know all that's going on

between the two of you...

What do you know.

That you're getting

your treatment done

Treatment... hahahah... Go,

go, tell everyone...

Yes I will tell to the

entire colony and you go to hell.

You go to hell. You take your money.

Now I'll show you

when you come to me...

And one more thing...

One day or other all this

will come out in the open.

I've become habituated to

earning quick money thanks to you...

What is wrong in this?

As it is what does a boyfriend and

girl friend do with each other...

Why?

Eating burgers at Wimpy's.

Some kisses... some touching...

...now they aren't going to have

kids right... all wastage of sperm...

Listen now you be

away from all these.

All the time

You land up connecting such

diverse topics with each other...

If I listen to you... I'll

land up dying a bachelor

Come on your job.

Me, hi I'm on the treadmill...

...what are you doing in parlour?

Hadn't you refused me? Are

you out of your mind?

You hang in there, am coming.

Stay there. Okay bye.

What are you doing here?

Extremely sorry sir, not

today please next time double

Just give a little bit.

Give some at least...

Hey have called for some

sweets from Tiwaris...

Send them home...

Ma'am, your driver is waiting...

Leave that.

Mom... here's the money...

Thank you aunty I will be back. Bye.

O stranger from distant lands

Your home is across the seas...

O, dear foreigner

I could not understand anything...

but you sing beautifully...

This was mom's favourite song...

...5 year's back she died,

since then...

Sir tea

In the house there's

only myself, dad and Peeshi

One thing's for sure...

...your children will

become singers

Meaning

Genes, after all they

will have an effect.

Well do you love children.

You love kids.

I'm ok

I love kids

You love kids

- I love them.

I am also a kid only.

Unsaid things get colored

You start calling a

person your very own

Sir its coming switched off.

Yes.

Suddenly how come you

made a plan to meet?

I want to tell you something.

Tell me.

I am a divorcee

I knew it. I knew there

had to be something...

...that you're forever cranky...

What's the story?

3 years back we had an

arranged marriage.

The boy was from DU. A Banker.

Oh would be earning well.

Sorry then what happened.

Nothing, on our first night of

marriage, I came to know that...

...he loved somebody else and married

me only under family pressure.

I don't know why

he kept it a secret.

Should have told me.

They are sissies... Bengalis

I am not like that.

What happened after that?

Nothing, caught an auto in

the middle of the night..

...and came back to my house.

He did not even find it

necessary to drop me home.

Ha, that's not a marriage there,

you didn't even have sex...

Besides you had to

spend on the bridals...

Well when you meet mom,

avoid the divorce matter.

Why. - We're Punjabis...

conservative... not modern like you'll

And you.

Everything is cool for me.

Do you have a secret...

No.

735 friends on Orkut

750 on Facebook...

And this is the profile picture

All details are totally correct.

You can check it whenever...

Why are we here...

...what do you want from me.

Don't know Ashima...

But since I've met you... I

feel I can't live without...

It's like you've become a habit...

first when I met you at the bank...

I was like what kind of girl

is she... then I was like...

...no however she is...

she's just fine...

...to make you smile sort of

became my responsibility...

...after dropping you at

home in the evening...

...and then picking

you up in the morning...

...and the time in between...

bloody just doesn't pass...

...but why've you

asking me all this...

Because even I have fallen for you.

I want to marry you.

I want kids a family...

...but that's ok...

it's not necessary...

...for you to have

similar feelings...

Maybe you don't

want to settle down...

So you can let me know

Come, let's go to your

Kaalibadi and get married.

I am serious Vicky.

I am also serious.

Listen... this

'Peeshi' in your house...

Is she your cat or dog...

Peeshi means aunt.

Do you drink

The purity of water

It's nice... a little blue though

Sit comfortably

I like it...

Really?

Brings a tear to my eyes

My beloved didn't show up

My love didn't show up

My beloved didn't show up

My love didn't show up

You know what a

drunken bengalan looks...

Take a look at

yourself in the mirror.

You are drunk

Father's at home...

Peeshi?

So do we play ludo sitting here?

Your absence has made me go crazy

Come back, my beloved

Your absence has made me go crazy

Come back, my beloved

Seasons have come and gone

You still haven't come, my love

O intro... get out of here...

You still haven't come, my love

When I saw your divine eyes

A tear came to my eye

On the terrace when we would meet

I will call you.

- Ok. Correct...

Bye

- Bye

I'm crazy about you. I love you

You won't find anyone like me

Forego the world and come back to me

Brings a tear to my eyes

A tear came to my eye

What is all this

going on in your life.

Nothing.

Lying doesn't suit you

Who is this Ashima.

We are getting married

Listen... dating and

shating is fine...

...chilling out, going out

ls fine... but marriage.

Listen understand the

importance of bachelorhood...

In bachelorhood you can eat when

you want, drink when you want...

...the toothpaste cap will

remain wherever you left it...

...but after marriage

you'll lose this freedom.

And from the client's point of view

the value of bachelor's sperm is...

Every time you just talk

about sperm... sperm... sperm

It's been four years...

my mind has gotten rusted...

Rise above the sperm

there is a heart also.

Chaddha sir what about love?

Your dad's never

going to accept this...

Why Peeshi ma?

Why... you know don't talk

like as if you don't understand...

North lndian...aethe uthey kithey...

oh god...ssss...

cant even think about it...

you know they don't even take off

the price tags from their clothes...

and then they'll say

'Oh I made a mistake...'

Ok just meet him once

No this match is NOT

possible at all

Showed you so many girls...

and finally you chose to

find yourself a Bengali...

Ashima Roy...have you lost it?

Her name itself is so bitter,

what'll she be like...

do you know how

dominating these girls are...

and why do I have to

adjust everytime...

I am not going to adjust

this time, I will not...

...first get dominated by in

laws then by this Bengali bride...

...listen carefully, only a Punjabi

bride will enter this house...

...and that too a

fair & pretty one...

else go get married all by yourself!

Even if no one goes, I will

definitely go to your marriage...

and that too wearing

a suit by Ritu Kumar

Grandmom, you don't

interfere...please don't...

I have only one son...and

he'll get a Bengali bride...?

Listen they are really big misers...

I challenge you, show me one

such Bengali in the whole world...

...who lives like

us...with a big heart...

...and their

food...FISH...bitter oil...

morning evening

night fish fish fish...

god, a man would just faint...

I will not...

Mom please

ya...at least meet her just once

lam not going to

meet that Bengali woman

She is not typical.

Every time something good happens...

...she has to spread

sadness...that's her habit

Your grandfather, wanted

to make you a sardar...

I was the one who opposed it...

...and now this Bengali woman,

she's going to make you a monkey...

...will make you wear a

monkey cap and rubber chappals...

then don't come to me crying...mumma

save me... save me, help help help

Ignore all that...you tell me...

does she look like Moon Moon Sen?

Better than that...

Ya...

- Yes

Show me a photo...

It is in the phone see.

Show me...

Here

Oh dear god, looks so pretty...

like a princess... touchwood...

...can I give you a surprise?

I am going to sponsor

your honeymoon trip...

Oye why did you

stop this...continue.

What is this you are doing?

You know I hate North Indians...

I mean you're an independent,

modern, smart, Bengali woman...

and he ARORA, Punjabi!

We have our culture, literature,

music...

...this just won't match,

no match at all...

bloody money minded business

class (Making fun) bailey bailey...

and you want to do that monkey dance

...that's right baba...that's

exactly what I want to do...

...and what culture

are you talking about...?

About that son-in-law of

yours who didn't have the guts...

...to speak the truth that he

already loved somebody else...

...he was your cultured,

well read Bengali...right?

Vicky's not like that... he

genuinely cares for me baba...

That's because he has some personal

agenda...they are selfish people

Ya he does have an agenda

baba...he wants to marry me

Where does he work?

Own business.

What?

No no this marriage cannot happen...

...your uncle's son-in-law,

can't you find a boy like him...

I don't care papa...

That is why I told you

not to settle in Delhi.

You keep quiet...

your also responsible...

...what do you mean

by you don't care...

I am the owner of

this house I decide here

Here have this fish

Fish...a man's character can be known

from the way he buys his fish...

...he has to pass

the fish test first.

He does not eat fish.

Couldn't you find a

Bengali boy to fall in love with?

Best of the Bengali boys wants

to marry you...doctor, engineer...

They are good

looking...smart...well behaved...

they are good lovers...too...yes...

what...what...what do you think...

...what do you think,

they are not good in bed.

What're you saying...

I'm saying the right

thing...they are good in sex also

I was...

if your mom was

alive...she would have told you...

when I used to hug her

tight...she would ummm feel shy...

...and ask me to loosen up...

...and don't tell me

Punjabis are better than us.

When do you want to meet him?

What will I do

visiting those bengalis...

...sorry but I can't come...

No no I wasn't telling

you...ya ya I'm coming...

Pack me 4 portions of

chole-puri with extra choley...

...ya I'm coming

you keep the phone...

Sorry friend sorry.

Sir, you tell me not to get married

While you yourself have a wife...

No no she's not my wife...

...she's my maid

servant since 32 years...

...now she behaves like

a wife inspite of a being a maid...

...so as good as a wife...

Sorry dear

Fine don't come...but never

try calling me ever again...

I hate Punjabis.

I can understand.

...our nature is different

and further more they are Aroras...

...didn't I tell you these

Bengalis don't like us Punjabis

I hate Delhi also.

Sir, which means you

haven't seen Delhi well enough...

lam happy in my CR

Park my Bengali colony.

By the way...that too is Delhi sir

Are you his uncle?

No no business partner

professional uncle you can say.

What is your business.

Trading Trading...no

investments...only profits

Sir...you didn't tell

us why you hate Punjabis

Because we believe in simplicity...Not

like Punjabis who are only show offs.

I agree with you madam...Our

cultures just don't match...

I was explaining him this only

that there will be a problem...

See understanding

Sir understanding is

very important sir...

If the two of us have an understanding

all problems will get solved...

...and I know a

little bit about Bengalis

I see what do you

know about Bengalis.

They love fish...

Sir, they're intelligent...

jana gana mana adhinayak...

...our national anthem was written

by gurudev Rabindra Nath Tagore...

and sir Mohan...football

Football Mohan Bagan

Sir, that guy plays

brilliant football

Guy... it's a team,

it's a football team...

He made a team...and

your 'elder sister' sir

elder sister...elder sister Mamata

Ya...that very same elder sister

is the 11th chief minister of Bengal

Sorry, sir.

Tuna.

Yes Baba

Bring the tea

I'll bring the starters

Mrs.Arora I hope Vicky has informed

you that Ashima is a divorcee

Divorcee? Vicky you didn't...

This is too much.

Oh such a fine girl...you

don't look like it at all...

anyways all for good...that

fellow's loss and Vicky's gain...

Now whatever grandmom

decides would be the final word

Listen you don't have

any children do you...

O grandmom, what's the difference,

we either say yes or no...

whichever way lets decide

fast...what's the big deal!.

For me she's absolutely Ok...

Dolly for me she's

absolutely fine...

You know Dolly...Vicky's mother...

Vicky's father Gurmeet

passed away very young...

...and she became a

widow at a very young age...

if it was up to me I would

have gotten her remarried...

why spend your

whole life sad & alone?

I appreciate your

progressive thinking.

Thank you.

If Vicky's fine, then even

we don't have any problem...

after all we're also modern people...

right...congratulations dear...

Your husband didn't come ma'am

Oh I never married...ummm...

I didn't find the right man

Oh...you should have told me...

I would have lined up

right men for you...

Mr.Rai there must be

tremendous pressure on you

Why?

Daughter is a

divorcee and sister bachelor

And you widow.

You...

How old must you be

Excuse me, can we

talk about the wedding

See, we don't want a loud

marriage...not loud at all...

and the marriage should

follow the Bengali traditions

No no no no...the marriage will

be done by Punjabi traditions...

...after all it's our

son's first marriage...

so many known people...they're

all waiting to be invited...

and please do invite a DJ

DJ...

No no no what is she saying

Listen dear...you keep quiet...

...you now belong to

the Arora family...

...let these bongs speak what

they wish to...uh anything else

See...all this drinking and all that

goes on in your Punjabi marriages...

I personally feel that all that should

not happen in a marriage ceremony

Our family really

does not like that.

Where are the beer bottles

Look through the window of your eyes

Measure it on the

balance scale of your heart

Look through the window of your eyes

Measure it on the

balance scale of your heart

You will not find

someone like me no matter

...where in the world you search...

search...search

You people open da door

I manna burn da floor

What is this.

He's become a sucker

Get mixed in our

lives and its colour

Could not she find a

better Bengali boy.

Look how they're dancing,

like monkeys.

Oye pigs, stop this, the

ceremony is about to begin.

Get mixed in our

lives and its colour

Why're they taking

her round and round

Hope she doesn't fell giddy...

Great ...enjoy

This is all a wastage of money,

wastage of sperm.

Search...search

search...search

You people open da door

I manna burn da floor

You people open da door

I manna burn da floor

Yes, yes, I am coming.

Bunty bring on the

liquor bottles from the car...

I never wanted Tuna to get

married in a Punjabi family...

...but now I think she

has made the right choice.

Both are looking so cute.

Peeshima what is this.

This is very simple.

There would be bulb in your house...

so remove the bulb...

and put it down...

We are happy and we keep

everyone happy. Come with me.

Where where Mrs. Arora

And wear their untamed

hearts on their sleeves

You will not find

someone like me no matter

...where in the world you search...

search...search

Your dad's gone balle balle

Mrs. Arora chicken

curry was out of the world.

Thank you thank you. What

I was saying was that...

...the terrace room is not

big enough for the two of you

...why don't we take a two

bedroom flat some where nearby.

No mummy we will manage. Why Vicky.

Mrs. Arora listen I am

shifting to Kolkata...

...and the entire

house will be empty.

They can easily shift there.

No no but they will be away from us.

Whose phone is it?

See...

...just been married...

don't you have any patience...

See this is a politician

family and I am under pressure.

Don't refuse, this is a big deal

and I have already made a commitment.

If you refuse, I'll

be in big trouble...

And What about the

problem that'll...

Vicky relax...think with cool mind.

On a later day, if this child

becomes tomorrow's Prime Minister...

...then you can proudly say Vicky

Arora's son is the Prime Minister.

Who are you explaining to?

Listen stop giving me this crap...

The risk has increased...you will

cause a break up in my marriage.

Complicated sperm.

Hurry UP-

Two minutes.

Okay, I will get it.

Go now...

Come on

Who? - No one.

Ready

Come on

Who was that man?

No one...

Moments.. these moments..

These moments of mine...

This is our exotic

honeymoon destination.

Yes yes absolutely O.K. Bye

People go to Bangkok

and we've come to Kolkata

So how do we like it.

Feels good... just place a

bed here...in the open air

Ok.

This mosquito net, reminds

me of cricket's net practice

I will die without you

This was just net practice...

...lets play again...

I will die without you

Mummy drinks

After dad's death she

became very lonely...

so gets relaxed taking one

or two pegs...feels good...

That's true cool ya

You know I wish to change my

profession, start something new

Why?

Its enough.

Don't feel interested...

But there is money in

your account. I've seen it

Any way whatever makes you happy...

...meanwhile drop me to the bank

and in the evening pick me up...

Just like that

Vicky has flown away...

...gone out of our hands...

How much more would you use him...

...now get used to being without

him...look for someone else...

if we can get 5-6 months

more with him, be grateful...

I won't be coming tomorrow...

Pain in the sperm.

Doctor will be

available tomorrow morning.

Excuse me where does Dr.Shobha sit

Third row from left.

Ashima are you fine?

Are you fine?

Why are you crying...tell

me what did the doctor say?

Ashima has tubal blockage.

I have read her reports...

...she would never

conceive in the natural process

Doctor she's still quite young...

...there must be some

treatment or way-out.

I understand your point Mr.Arora...

...but some times the body is just

not well equipped for the pregnancy.

I would not like to give

you any false hopes...

...but right now you

need to support Ashima...

...emotional and psychologically...

Vicky don't joke with me.

Never.

What happened.

Tuna can not have baby.

Is she alright.

Ashima say something...

What do I say...

...the entire world

can have kids except me

Don't think like this. Its destiny.

Destiny?

This is my destiny.

You're speaking as if I

haven't tried hard enough...

We'll consult some other doctor.

Haven't a child is

not everything is it...

But for me it is.

Our child...

...half punjabi, half Bengali...

...half Delhi, half Kolkata...

...half Vicky and half Ashima...

If you keep crying like

this...even I feel really bad...

to divert the mind..

...let's go out some where...

let's sit there and discuss...

Okay?

Such things happen

in today's life style.

What can we do...

Listen adopt.

Grandmom our blood is

our own after all...

See I am the head of family,

rest is up to Ashima...

Grandmom there are only

two things modern in Delhi...

...one is Metro and other you.

You know I don't know

about this adoption and all.

I have not thought about it.

I don't know whether we will

be able to give so much love...

...to another's child

I don't know. Anyways

I'm feeling sleepy...

Vicky this is only

my report, not yours.

Where are your reports?

We did your tests right.

No.

What?

No.

Why not.

What problem would

I have? I am fine.

How can you be so sure?

Every one will think

that I have a problem...

What if there is

some problem with you...

Fine, we'll do it tomorrow.

Don't get stressed

No one minute... the question is

not that we'll do it tomorrow...

...the question is why didn't you

get you're your tests done. Why?

Because...earlier I was

used to donate sperm...

I was a sperm

donor...l was a sperm donor...

It was before marriage.

So what about those...

handicrafts...Trading business.

Oh now I get it...

Why didn't not tell me...I am a

divorcee...still I told you right.

It was a marriage of only a

few hours still I told you...

...because I wanted you to

know everything about my life.

How could you hide such

a big thing from me...

Why is it so important

for you men to hide things.

Look at me when I am talking to you.

What would I have told you...

No you think now I will understand.

What would I have told

you...that I donate sperm.

I used to get myself

tested for pregnancy...

It would come out negative...

I used to cry for hours...

And you used to, very

calmly console me...

now I know why...you

were already had children

They are not my children

only my sperm was used.

Sorry, you did it for money.

Oh God.

Its disgusting Vicky.

Why didn't you tell me.

Look now I made a

mistake...now what do I do...

I am not interested just

tell me why didn't you tell me.

What would I have told you.

Did you do it after marriage also?

...used to come home

to collect the sample...

Move move...

Now, what's the point

in sleeping separately.

Husband wife have such problems.

And trust if that

itself does not remain.

I can not sleep with you any more.

I can not sleep with a

man who shags for money.

I feel so stupid...You

kept doing all this

...just didn't come to know.

Earlier I did it for

money but later

O.K. fine when you felt that you

were doing it for social service...

...then you could have told me...

...may be I could have understood...

And where are your children.

I want to meet them... now.

How you can just meet

them...it's It's a contract.

What contract...l am your wife.

You're my husband...

...they are your

children and I can meet them.

I want to meet them now.

I don't know...

I don't care just now.

What are you searching for.

Boroline.

Why.

What's it to you...l want it.

Not going to the bank.

Move...

Ashima.

The purity of water

Yes mummy.

Police is here, they are

saying that you have black money...

...and they have come to take that.

This is only a beauty parlour...

...or some other

facility is also available.

Excuse me, how're you

speaking with the lady...

Are you Vicky.

Mummy you go inside

Just tell me where

did all this come from.

I have purchased it,

don't people give gifts...

It is gift.

- Yes

These 25 lakhs is also a gift.

Good thing the parcel

went to the wrong address...

To Pepsi Ballad and

she reported it to us.

Listen. Where are you taking him...

Mummy you go inside...

I will come in sometime...

just inform Ashima

My beloved didn't show up

I am sorry my dear.

My love didn't show up

My beloved didn't show up

When I saw your divine eyes

Hey hero come outside.

Now you tell me that when a person

gets such good news after years...

...who's become a

father for the first time...

...and if he happens

to be a rich man...

Wouldn't he like to

share his happiness?

...he'd like to give a

gift...in cash or kind...

...besides this one came

from the minister's house...

...now if I take his name then

both of us will be in trouble...

ls there a business like this also?

Yes of course sir, and

its legal. Sperm donation.

What happened.

It makes no difference to you...

...if the some one's

life is destroyed does it.

Just tell me what happened

Sir Ashima can not be pregnant.

We can not have a child.

Me, a sperm donor,

used to brag about it...

...and now I myself

can't have a child...

Shit.

She has tubal blockage.

I am so sorry.

Forget this sorry sir...

it's like this only now,

life has taken my case.

Just listen...

Where is Ashima?

Don't you feel ashamed of

yourself doing this dirty business?

The inspector suspected

me of running a brothel...

You have ruined our family's name...

...and you ask me where Ashima is...

She has left for Calcutta...

...and if I was in her place,

I would have done the same.

Now get lost from here.

The purity of water

The purity of water.

Tuna have you fought

with him and come here.

No dad.

Then what's wrong.

Nothing.

...bloody villain,

I'll catch him soon...

Sperm donor ohm...

so what's the problem.

What are you saying dad?

How can you support him?

Darling you are a

modern woman, well read...

...well traveled and you are

talking like this rubbish.

Rubbish...your calling it rubbish...

Your son-in-law

already has children...

...and you expect me to

have a modern outlook?

He should have told me...

My beloved didn't show up

These are today's so

called modern women

...shameless - who can give

birth to a child with anybody...

Grand mom you call yourself modern.

Are modern people like this.

Atleast I understood one thing.

- bread also got burnt.

Those who couldn't have kids,

have kids today because of Vicky

Mom it's all science.

Listen...to hell with

your science and arts...

...because of this our

entire family's name is ruined...

This is science...

Memories

Your memories

Your thoughts

Smolder my life

Nights

Dark, lonesome nights

Frighten me, hound me

My love,

without you I shall die

Dolly let it be, am

not in a good mood today

without you I shall die

Even I am not in the mood

Thank you.

Vicky how are you brother?

Are you happy now? - Brother

if your there won't I be happy?

Vicky dear you've come alone?

Dolly aunty and Ashima didn't come?

No they didn't come.

- Congratulations.

They haunt

And tear me apart

Your memories

Your thoughts

My love,

without you I shall die

My love,

without you I shall die

Oye Vicky I heard

that Ashima has left...

listen am your uncle if you

have anything to say feel free.

You didn't even call...

where are you going.

To donate sperm. You

want to come along?

They haunt

And tear me apart

Vicky dear at my shop, look,

this is the ladies section...

...and that is gents section.

Poppy write the bills...

Vicky Dolly had called me, told me

that you've done something wrong...

...really you've done

something very inappropriate...

What wrong...what wrong have I done.

Uncle I was a sperm donor.

ls sperm donation wrong work.

If it is yes then what you will do.

You will stop me from

coming in the shop.

Go to hell with your shop.

What have you done all your whole life

except giving birth to this Poppy.

If you were a sperm donor like me...

...then could have had a chance

of giving birth to better samples.

My love,

without you I shall die

My love,

without you I shall die

My love,

without you I shall die

Hello, you didn't call me even once

Say something at least

What.

Just ask me how I am

Come back my dear...

...promise will

never make you cry again.

I need some more time Vicky.

Memories

Your memories

How are you.

Let it be...how I

could be without you...

Nights

Dark, lonesome nights

Frighten me, hound me

My love,

without you I shall die

Hello Vicky

How you dare to call here.

You got only my son in

the entire world for this.

No

- See I also know to do business...

...but I never play with

the emotions of people.

See you are misunderstanding me.

We have trusted on you

and you have used us.

You have made our house into

pieces, made partition of it.

What type of doctor are you?

Let it be now.

Shut up and see I am

giving you warning that...

...if you came in

front of my eyes...

...and if you tried to meet

or contact to me or Vicky...

...in future then I

will cut you into pieces.

Meet me once, please.

It makes no difference.

All these things happened and

you did not tell me anything.

Sir the reality is that you

have taken his advantage...

...you have purchased car,

farm house and house.

First it is important to take

out Vicky from this situation...

...otherwise the acidity which

is in me will never be healed up.

Dolly is the first lady

who read me correctly.

It is called grip on life...

that she has.

She was shouting in anger on phone

but there was pain in the voice.

Great lady.

Sir I understand Dolly ma'am...

...but now what to do

further that we have must think.

Oh, God.

So, what you are thinking sir.

I don't understand how

it will happen so soon.

You don't give me tension.

Sir you don't take tension and go.

Just leave that

key and lap top here.

Chaman!

Chaman what is going on.

Sir good morning sir

Good morning.

Sir

What is this.

Sir this is the file of Vicky Donor

and all the details are in this.

Oh you are very unpredictable sperm.

Sir you don't think now

and take the name of God...

...and dial the first number.

You are right.

Hello yes... Mr.Bhatia speaking?.

Mr.Bhatia greetings,. Dr.Baldev

from Chaddha Infertility clinic...

O.K. ma'am... Ahuja with Mrs.Ahuja

next Saturday 25th Anniversary.

Am I talking to Mrs. Grewal.

Hello, Dr. Chaddha.

Oh my God you recognized my voice.

You know what my in-laws say

that he is a ghost of Ambani.

Yes I have sent silver

anniversary card by courier.

But it was my duty to

invite you personally.

Mrs. Mehta has done another one!

I am so sorry Mr.Mehta...

...by the way Mr.Mehta can

you give the number...

...of new husband of Mrs. Mehta.

He cut it

Can I talk to Mrs.

Mirchandani please.

Next baby, cooler sperm...

After two building.

Madam is not there... he is in

the bedroom with someone else.

Yes Mr.Lee Silver Jubilee

Kapoor or this is

just a gentle reminder.

We will definitely come.

Tuna so what's your plan.

Bank wants to know

when you are joining back.

I don't know.

What you are doing is

not good for you Tuna.

Whatever is in your heart you must

discuss with Vicky, it is necessary.

It is necessary.

Did he feel necessary to tell me?

I don't know

You are so shameless!

Always keep coming here!

Every one commits a mistake.

You forget the past.

Again you are back

on the same topic.

Don't say topic...

...since the last two months four...

...cases have been

lodged by clients against me.

You ask why because their children

have not even learnt to say...

...mummy papa and they

have started to abuse.

The party says that the family back

ground of the donor was not good.

Shake hands at least!

Well tried Chaddha sir,

please get out.

Please.

See I can understand your

frustration but I realized.

How can you

understand the frustration?

This house is not a

house without Ashima.

The silence is haunting...

One iron lady your

mother told me correctly...

...that I have

spoiled your family life.

I did it. I have to correct it now.

Dolly says that Ashima

should come back home.

I also think that

Ashima should come back.

Ashima has to understand

that you were not wrong.

This is not possible.

Once you bring her to my clinic

for one hour on next Saturday.

Next Saturday is the 25th

anniversary of the clinic.

See this, 25th silver

jubilee anniversary.

Do you think that she will come?

Brother...

I told you I need some more time.

I can not come now.

Just see, it is only

a matter of one day.

Even after that if you feel

that what I did was wrong then...

...we will sort

out according to you.

You want separation or divorce?

Divorce?

Did I hear divorce...no no.

not again you will go with him.

Dad you are again taking his side.

Yes I am...

...because you are only

thinking about yourself.

But she is right papa, meaning I

have not told her. It is my mistake.

Question yourself Tuna.

You are hurt because he was donor

or he has not informed you or...

...you can not get pregnant

while he can become a father.

He loves you...

...even after knowing that because of

you he can not give birth to a child.

He loves you...he wants to be with

you...it's not that easy darling.

For once, just think from his side.

It's ok.

If you don't want to

come then don't come.

Why are you crying?

See I have come to your city

Kolkata for the second time.

Show me your city.

Show me Kaalibadi...

...a match of Mohan Bagan...

Make me meet Mamata

didi but don't cry.

But don't cry.

Welcome.

Come, come.

Grace of God,

welcome...come...please come.

Ashima.

Whatever Vicky has done or I got it

done from him was right or wrong

I really don't know...

Call me a businessman or a

doctor or my helplessness...

Nor do I wish to

give any explanation...

But I would like to

ask you one question.

Just stand here and tell me

how you are feeling to see...

...these kids playing in the park.

What kind of a question is this?

All I know is among these...

...kids even my child

could have been there.

All are happy, enjoying-

Everyone's family is complete but...

...why not mine.

Just like you are feeling now...

...few years back parents of these

children were also feeling the same.

Before Vicky donor

came into their life.

The reason for their

happiness is Vicky.

Because these

children are from his sperm.

Come with me.

Look, look.

Which among them are mine?

Each & everyone is yours...

All of them are mine?

- 53

Total 53

Vicky..

Can I meet them?

- Sure.

Yes but don't ask for details.

When this little flower

bud blooms into a plant

Bud blooms into a plant

The pot of wants blooms with it

And so does the demand for this...

...that and just about

everything that money can buy

As the wants are unlimited

and even bigger than the sky

Hello.

Here, here's you gift.

There he stands, and

another one stands

Asking for money,

and much more money

There he stands, and

another one stands

Asking for money,

and much more money

Very good.

Enjoy yourself.

When a bud turns into a tree

He is quiet fit.

You get the urge to live

Sit down, sit down.

When this little plant

turns into a big tree

Plant turns into a big tree

The feeling takes over to

live big, in style and live free

Its a great couple

That boy there in black...

...his hair is like yours...

That little foreigner girl's...

...nose is like yours...

...that little ching chong...

...his eyes are like yours.

Baba was right and I was insecure.

I can not do the same

which you did...never...

I am sorry.

Sorry.

There is one more child...

...and I want you to meet with him.

Myself and Chaman

were inviting the...

...clients by going door

to door for the anniversary.

I came to know that

one couple among them...

...died in a car accident

near Chandigarh few years back.

After death of the son

they came to know...

...that their grand

daughter is a donor baby.

They tried hard to find

out but could not succeed.

Due to the old age and since there

was no one after them to take care...

...they put her in

this orphanage house.

...and Mr.and Mrs.Arora the

name of the child is Diya...

...and she's been here

with us for last six months...

Shall we go and meet her.

Sure sure...

Let's go home.

Thank you ma'am

lam sure you are

going to keep Diya happy.

Thanks ma'am

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Thanks. - Come. Come.

Thank you.

God bless.

You did all this for me.

Chaddha sir you are unbelievable...

What did I do? I

have not done anything.

You did all this and

this is your wonder.

The wonder of your sperm

This entire world is a sperm.

God bless you.

Bye.

Chaddha sir...

Listen there is a

demand from one more party.

What are you talking?

lam a family man now.

Just do it for the last time.

Shall I say yes?

I will get it picked up

from any where you say.

Ok.

Ok. Bye!!!

The one with beautiful eyes,

open the window and see.

Weigh it in your heart and see.

The one with beautiful eyes,

open the window and see.

Weigh it in your heart and see.

You will not find a

young man like me.

You may search in the whole world.

Search, search. Search, search.

You people go for the door.

I want to be on the floor.

Mix it with our colours.

Go over it with red flowers.

You will not find a

young man like me.

You may search in the whole world.

Search, search. Search, search.

You people go for the door.

I want to be on the floor.

You people go for the door.

I want to be on the floor.

For the sake of love.

Will open my heart before you.

You will not find a

young man like me.

You may search in the whole world.

Search, search. Search, search.

My shoes are sequenced.

The moustache is starched,

and the turban is colourful.

You will not find a

young man like me.

You may search in the whole world.

Search, search. Search, search.

Vicky Donor (2012) - full transcript