Venise n'est pas en Italie (2019) - full transcript

An adaptation of the novel Venice is not in Italy by Ivan Calbérac, published by Flammarion in 2015: Emile is fifteen. He lives in Montargis, between a sweet-crazy father and a mother who ...

Well! It is not very surprised.

Someone to come help Theo?

Beautiful solidarity!

Emile, the table!

Oh, no...

You prefer two hours glue?

Come on hurry up!

That's it!

Like what, I will not ask the moon!


Here it is, the little fayot shit!

You want your ball?


What is the little "e"?

I... I wrote it for recognition.

Because I'm F... F... Emile.

Well, hello Emile!
It's me, it's Pauline.

You too had hooked. Archi burnt.

You delusions? You do not burnt at all.

Lend me your tel.

If you request your num girl,
you're in trouble.

Here are your reum...

It is not possible, the sucks!

Why are you here?

I had a gluten free cake.

So I brought you on your taste.

Mom, I'm in kindergarten.

What is this chocolate bread?
-Nothing. It is Jer.

It made me taste.

You appetite!

Yeah, phew!

Why you eat stuff full of palm oil?

Huh? Priceless, and more!

Pay to get poisoned.

Here! I have work.

Oh, the nightmare! You understand

what I saw? -Yeah, it's ugly.

My mother is like math divisions

often lacks restraint.

I discovered

a new theorem: Theorem

of "Pauline and ping pong."

Pauline hands you a ball in the yard

afternoon, you spend the entire evening

looking at pictures of her on the Internet.

Seek not, it's mathematical. Finally,
are nevertheless an equation

I not able to solve:

Why a girl like her would be
interested in someone like me,

living in a furnished room in the garage
of the background to the neighbor?

All because I have no real home.


Hello, Emile.

Soft music

Hi Dad.

Hi, son.

I harmonize my energy with the rising sun.

It makes a world of good.

You should put you there. -Hold on...

Already we are taking to the Gipsy Kings.

You will see.

When we have the most
beautiful house in the street,

they will eat you in hand.

And speaking of hands,

I hand you the tail of the bird.

Take them in yours.

No, I do not want to shit on me.

It expires.

I recovered.

She sings. -Hi Mom.


Good appetite Darling.

Take your omega 3.
I prepare your beet juice.

Sigh of disgust

Why the most dangerous stuff

are the best for you? -That's life!

There's always a price to pay. Here!

You see? Looked.

That's it, we're there.

The waves, mobiles.

If you want to hit you from
cancer at age 20.

We will not all end up like this.

It has who survive.

But if in ten years, you got a brain tumor,

will not surprise you.

You'll catch your death!

No, it's the opposite.

I might end centenary.

In Japan, on the island of Okinawa,
they bathe in winter in frozen water.

Saint-Exupary said: "The man discovers

"When it is measured by the obstacle."

Measure yourself already in the shower.

And do not put anywhere for once.

I can not take more of this caravan.

One day you'll regret our bohemian life.

I do not think so. -I think that if.

Oh, that!

Before your homework, we will remake

your color: it darkens.

My mother dyed my hair blonde
every month since I was 7 years old.


What you got now? You gasps for everything.

If you want us to stop, we stop.

But anyway, it would be a shame.

We will not do life anyway?

I already told you:

either you are beautiful of course,
but this is very rare,

either have to optimize
your starting capital.

Radio Shows

Six minutes. -Eight. If not you stay

long enough, it is useless.

I love! Commit, commit. I love

this song.

"Love, love, love" (Mouloudji)

Bernard croons.

You dance, ma'am?

It's not dance it.


Whatever the music,
provided that the body rejoices.

I think I will not exult much this morning.

Honey, you're a queen. -Oh no...

The queen of apples, yes!
-No, you're my queen.

It hums.

The timer rings.

That's it! David Guetta.

I would have preferred Brad Pitt.

T'as blondi.

No... No matter what!

If t'as Blondi. -No.

T'as blondi! T'as blondi!

Oh, girl! -Shut up!

What happened?

(-Thank you.)

I am really sorry.

It will not happen again. Moreover,

Emile will apologize to Alicia.

But she's too fucking my mouth.

Apologize to Alicia.


She has the eye,

the little! It lightens her hair,

because it suits her better.

But not like to talk about it.
-But you're sucks!

It's not possible!

Cool! Relax, man. Take it easy!

Marie-France can keep a secret.

Huh? -But yes!

She's a bit of us.

Yes do not worry. And your father is right:

it suits you very well. -Ah!

What did I say?

I'm lucky:

I am beautiful without artifice.

They laugh. This is not the same.

I like women...

Life has its mysteries.

I like you, but I know why...

In any case, that will be fine, it's Alicia.

Thank you.

Like Mother like daughter.

By the way, told you about my
permission for mayor.

Yes. I have still no news.

I would have told you. -You'll get by you.

You got long arms.

I'm trying. I assure you, it's complicated.

Of course.

My mother says there are waves.

You do not have a headache after a while?

If it was my mother calling,
I hurt right away.

Hi, Emile. -Hi.

So, you get it when it tennis?

When you want.

Are you ready?

You suck, actually.

Yes, it is best

in math. -Seriously?

I galley of relief at math.

If you want I can help you.

Yeah, totally.

Saturday afternoon at home?

I have to be able to arrange it.

Why do you mytho like "I can arrange"?

As if you did not you piss on Saturday?

My father said that with chicks,
must have overwhelmed the air.

You listen to your father now? -Not all.

Takes a sort.

She sniffs.

What's the matter?

The council refused the license
and want the field.

Your father is unreachable.

I left him 15 messages.

It's him!

Hello! -Do not worry,

my darling. It'll get better.

We will fix that. -But how?

I paid a deposit to the plumber,
the roofer, the mason.

Sir, the building does not accept VRP.

But I'm consultant in technical
security system:

armored door, video surveillance,
alarm with American.

It's the same. -Sorry?

It's the same. -Who?

Mr. Chamodot. You see? I have a date.

If not built, all is lost.
-We will get out of this

as one is still out.

You allow a minute?

Do not hang up.

Hi, I'm a specialist in security:

CCTV... -No, thank you.

The door slams. A dog barks.

And "Can not Chamodot".

Stop, Bernard! I am exhausted.


I do not live in it all my life.
-Do not worry.

Your father said you would succeed
in building the house.

"Can not Chamodot."

you there still believe
in this saying stupid?

But of course I believe it.

It's okay, Mom!

You can stop there.

I can leave you to the gate.
-No. It's great there.

The engine stalls.

Go to the tree in an hour and a half?

I'm not your dog. -No, I did not say that.


Do not forget the carrot cake.

That is not to arrive empty-handed.

Well, hello... -At any hour.

Well, it's going!

Come on! -Yeah!

She starts.

... Yes?

Hello, I just see Pauline...

You must be Emile? -Yes Madam.

I'll tell Pauline.

Shop around. You will please your shoes off?

Of course Madam.

Come in, I'm in the kitchen.

Uh, I shoeless me.


(Fuck! Fuck, shit!)

II Helez.

You are barefoot?

Um yes.

Put your socks, you'll catch cold.

I never wear.

I lived in Africa.

I love Africa.

You live where?

Ben, Africa...

from South!

They abolished, but there is still much

apartheid there.
It was not too hard to live?

Uh... No, it was fine.

It inspires.

It's Matcha is super good.

He grunts.

The not drink, if not love yourself.
-Yes Yes!

Your mother looks nice. -It is bone sucks.

She's depressed, she wad seals.

She's bored because my father
estjamais there.

A conductor, this trip.

You play the harp? -Yeah...
but basically, I'm pretty

soul, funk, rap...

But when I play, at least,
my father calculates me.

You play me something to see?

A simple trick, two to three notes.

It bothers me too much when you look at me.

OK I understand.

But wait, I have an idea.

That's two to three notes.

It's beautiful.

If it tempts you, I'll play

with a youth orchestra.

Bluntly, this is where?

In Italy, in Venice.

Uh... Awesome.

you can even stay in the apartment.

Uh... I have to see if I can free myself.

So you factored, "x factor 35 more 9x is 0.

"So, x is..." -Emile!

Your mum rang the intercom.

I'm here.

You're early!

I have not swallowed a clock.

You want to come in, ma'am?

No, no... Oh no!

We have to go. Uh, that's it!


Your shoes.

Ah yes!

Thank you. Mom, you move not.

I arrive.

I know not what you say to him, but he fled.



Looks your father.

I could go five minutes!

I make you ashamed? -Not at all.

I'm not on my 31,

but this is not the Miss France.

You're very beautiful, well...

Try not to make me backwards.

What will we take as pizza, darling?

She clears her throat. -Margherita.

Ah yes!



"Three" Margherita and a "picado".




It's Italian.

It means "of course."

Laughing I know what it means.

But if I may,

you have a point of emphasis.

An Italian accent?

Do not be smart.
What region do you come from?

Wait, let me guess.

Northern Italy?



Yes, the Roman accent. I recognized.

Thank you.

You are welcome.

Prego too.

This girl invites you to Venice...

It's your girlfriend?

You would she become?

If it is a friend, I'm already happy.

You'd see the house of the parents.

Should maybe we meet them?

He stammers.

Of course yes.

Or talk to them by phone. It's good too.

An invitation to Venice!

This is not nothing.


But the trip costs candy train.

I know, but I would too go.

Yes, but is that our finances
allow us to do?

Money, I not under the hoof of a horse!

I have set aside for the
dentist for my teeth...

If I leave it to later...

we can offer him his ticket.


It will, your teeth in the meantime?

I've seen others.

So it's okay?

You're plugged or what?

With me, no, it's not and yes, it is yes.

Lord. -Goods.

But I have a much better idea.

We will go together in Venice.

Your mother always dreamed of.

Are you serious?

We can not seriously.

It's been 20 years I expect this trip

of weddings. -I know.

It makes you not happy? -Yes Yes.

But Mom is scared by car
because of large trucks.

I'll be fine. I can take with me.

My accident was 15 years ago. -Yes.

It is time for me to move.


It will cost us a fortune. -Nope!

This is where the brilliant idea.

Right in front of Venice,

there is a camping, cheap.
We will go together

our caravan.


And yes!

With the caravan? -Oh yeah!

Fallaitjuste thinking.

"She wanted to be called Venice" (Clerc)

She wanted me to call Venice

You see striped suit me

The voice submitted gondolier

Paddling for cherry

For a kiss She wanted me to call Venice

What a funny idea!

What a funny idea!

She pushes a high note.

Pauline? Pauline, wait.


It will be possible for Venice.
I have family over there.

It's easier. -Ah well, nickel!

When is the concert? -On the first Sunday
of the holiday, to 16 pm.

You will come? -Certo.

You speak Italian? -Ma che si!

Very good! You know what else to say?

Uh... -So, you talk to Italian.

But you got a good accent.

In addition, Emile!

You see, if I take from Cremona...

We made a stop.

Why do you not make use
of the GPS on your mobile?

GPS, you kidding? Never!

A woman who talks constantly,

who said: "Turn, goes straight." Huh?

Progress that? I call it slavery.

I'm not a dog

who is told: "Standing up, lying down."

Annie laughed. No sir.

I am a free man.

With this card, we will go to port.

And There you go!

To make us aware of the Italian culture.

It's been a while that there is awareness.



What are you doing here?

A not planned leave.

You've still beaten

in the kitchen?
-No! And do not take my head.

We can wait before yelling?

Speak to your mother better! Etjure me

they might not have fired.

I tell you not. Let go the bunch.

It's warm. When will the microwave? -Never!

You've explained that it radiated foods.

You are sick.
-We'll see who will be sick in 20 years!

And do not you come at the right time.

We leave tomorrow morning in Venice.

I'm taking your mother

see masterpieces by Tintoretto d'ceuvre
the Accademia Gallery.

If you have nothing to do,

you're welcome.

For you engueuliez all the way?

But no!

I do not know if Fabrice wants to see
paintings by Tintoretto.

No I think not.

A bit of general culture you would not hurt.

But you ask me to Lyon.

Of course. This is our way.

Good night.

Shirley, I will be in Lyon tomorrow.

I'll take care of your ass. Call me back.

Warning! -Oh no...

En garde, I say! Pare. Sigh


Foot, quiet. Hop, hop!

Ow, fuck!

Should parry.

You're sucks!

I hurt you? -Yes.

It's good.

You sleep with me tonight? -I have to.


Hey! It's still a nice idea I had,

to go to Venice!
-It was a bit your last chance.

How are you, my last chance?

You wanted to leave me?


You can not live without me.

There is no life that you had promised me.

That is true.

It will not go as I planned.

Yes, it's the least we can say.

(-I know.)

But I have not said my last word.

That word...


Talking, that, you know do not you?

Wake up alarm

Wake up, it's time. Come on, we gotta go.

Come on!

Ho! -Fabrice!


Yes, I am fine. I'm here.

Calm down. -And not hurry you!

That one to get out of bed...

You really sucks... -It will!

Come on, rolls.

"A.I.E. (A Mwana)" (Black Blood)

Papa, on there.

All right, stop.

The bird does not sing because he is happy.

He is happy because he sings.

You do in a beautiful bird!

I'm happy, I sing.

Come on, dammit! We are on vacation.

He shakes the hand brake.

What are you doing? -A second.

Who is he?


That's it. -Ah!

Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you.


I present Vijay.

Hello. -HELLO.

We'll do some carpooling,

to balance the costs. -Huh?

Vijay has a job interview in Macon.

That's it? -Yes.

It should not be that four? -Yes.

But there is one that stops at Lyon.

I'm already down. Macon is above Lyon.

It depends on where we go.

Lets' go.

En route, bad company!

Macon is before Lyon? -Yes.

It makes us not a detour?
-All roads lead to Rome.

And Venice is not far from Rome.

Sigh Bernard starts.


Warning! Bernard, the truck! Ah!
The truck, damn!


Why he rolls like that!

Calm down. -He has no right!

She gasps. -Everything is fine.

Quiet... -Wait, it will not.

I do not feel good. -We will stop.

Okay? It will stop. Breathe.

I can not...

She is puking.

I dream?

All right, darling?
-I do not know if I'll get there.

If it really will not,

we turned around and we go.


No, Dad! -What do you mean?

"Gracias" is Spanish, not Italian.

It is also said in Italian.

Not at all! It is "grazie".

You can very well say "gracias"
to an Italian.

He understands that it means "thank you."

Yes. If Spanish speaking ltalian.

You want to always be right.
You're too proud.

OK, you gaves me.

How do you say "thank you"
in your mother tongue?

Thank you.


But you are...

100 %...


My father was Indian but
my mother was French.

So my mother tongue... -Yes, yes!

Do not go further. I like precision.

You say "was". Your parents are dead?

An earthquake in India in my 10 years.

10 years? Oh dear!


On repart.

It will be fine. -It's good.

At the riding accident, always up.


You want an egg?
I dive mayo in the cafeteria.

Rite II.

When we left,

there are more thieves.

You want, Vijay? -Me, that's fine.



Thank you. -You take the holiday-checks?

No, it's been.

You take the most?

No. -What do you mean?

Sorry, it's not my decision.

And if we did demonstrate
personal initiative

and we will say:
"I'll take the vacation certificates"?

I might get fired.

Laugh Yeah...

I understand, but at the same time,

it would not matter.

You will not stand your life in a cab.

It should not be easy, I guess.

All these tourists with a smile...
And you're alone

Klaxons in your cabin.

At least we not replaced me with a robot.

Advance, shit!

One second, I speak.

Try meal vouchers.

The meal vouchers? -No more. Really,

Taking that money. -We can do nothing.

Sorry. -Too bad. Never mind!

Sir, we'll talk Klaxons

all this later...

... -Oh!

Shh, horns!

We stop!

The Earth is everyone! -The rude!

I agree. -A rudeness.

Thank you. Good road. -Goodbye.

We'll cook like donuts!

The caravan is overheating the motor.

A mechanic gave me this-thing there.

By heating to bottom, the engine is cooled.


-. If I saw it on the Internet. -Ah!

The car will stay the course?

Of course. But it must be pampered.

If you want, I'll take it.

I thought you had more permits.

I thought we were a family of thieves.

You mix everything.
That explains your academic failure.

I'll fuck. -Stay polite.

What did he say? -He said nothing.

Be careful.

Be careful.

I am hot.

Do not touch that. -Warning!

A truck horn, beware!

She is puking.

Honey, it was the bowl.

Without this new discomfort,
we would have farted a hose.

There are people who go to Macon.

They'll drop me.

Too bad! It will restart, you know.

Validate the payment on carpooling site.

Promise? -Yes.

Okay, look. Soon, Vijay.

You are a great guy. -Thank you.

Have a nice trip! -Thank you.

Good luck with your interview. -How nice.

Goodbye. -If we could change

of car, we'd like you. -Yeah.

Family imperfect, is better than no family.

I'm not sure, no.

Hey, Vijay! Remember to put a nice comment

on the Internet. -Yes!

Talk it over

your Indian friends.

(-Putain!) Sigh

This is the problem of those
roadside restaurants.

It's unfortunate they are not double firing.

And we are left with soft fried.

You want some? -No, I drive.

You do not tell him...

Shirley, is hell right now...

I know where pioncer tonight,
you understand that?






She would not have too many drinks,
your mother?

Starts, Dad. We take serious delays.

If I do not take care

of the car, you are not going anywhere.
Where are you going, then?

Not in Lyon, anyway. Go ahead, roll.

Oh dear! It promises.

Lower heat if you go up the windows.

No, the engine will explode if I do that.

Etj'ai not want to be tempered.

We'll die of heat.

Not necessarily.

Hello. You take the meal vouchers?


Are there more trucks.


I have quite a headache.
-We'll stop for the night.

But tomorrow, the concert is 16 hours.

Well I?

Just had the Italian border.

If one starts at 8 pm, at noon,
we are in Venice.

You do all this trip for him?


No no not at all.

Emile thinks he is the center of the world.


Meanwhile, sleeping where?
-I'm taking care of it.

That seems fine here. Hm?

Dad, it's forbidden, wild camping.


I let me dictate my behaviorby
small politicos,

who make laws to annoy people.

To Venise!


And in life! -Yes to life!

IP to stay.

You see, my dear...

Are we a star that is dedicated to us,
the Chamodot.

That one.

She is magnificent. Huh?

But you never show me the same!

You got that impression, but...

This is because they move, the stars.

Oh yeah, my little man!

That's it, they pioncent.

We are going for a walk?

You're completely sick?
You've removed your license.

I know still drive, poor spot.

Dad was right:
you've got the low terror ass.

Not at all.

I'm not afraid.

(-Vas ahead, shoot!) ( 'But I push!)

Thank you.

You are welcome. -Thanks so much.


How a girl if you like we know?

Well, you try to talk to him.
If not calculate you is not good.

And if we're already friends?

Ooh La La! You're in big shit.

Should never make friends with a girl.


Show him that with you,
it's either we live cop,

whether it is "forget me liberates."

So, to me, is dead. -Well...

It is saitjamais.

You roll him a big shovel and you'll see.

How does "a big shovel"? -I do not know...


We're going to make a baby. -Cool!

Goal! C'mon, you're too bad.

You wanna play with him? -Yes.

OK, go.

I arrive.

I am a grid.

Thank you.

Good evening.

I'll present Natasha. -Hi.

I'll get my bag. You wait for me? -Yes.

She will sleep with us? -Yes. She's galley.

I think we will not do is sleep.

Damn, it's half an hour!

Go ahead, it's okay.


I will not make you a drawing.

You kidding?

No. Just go! She is waiting for you.

No I can not. I Pauline.

You are together?

No, it estjuste a friend.

So, you're nobody.

You're a virgin? -No.

Is that so? Have you ever...

Uh no.

So you're a virgin.

Well yes... -Well! You freak,

it's normal.

No it's not that. But for my first time,

I'd rather do it with a girl that I love.

Ooh La La! Very bad idea.

It is better you train with an unknown,

otherwise you will be zero
with the girl you love.

Just go.

She's waiting for you, I say.

You'll thank me later. -No I can not.

You're stupid. -I am romantic.

That's what I say: you're stupid.

(-She not expect at all.)

Well no...

Why? You believed me?

You're a little pervert, actually.

A little pervert who believes
in Santa Claus.

You, you're a bastard!

Wait... Laughing

What are you doing?

I took your phone to check the time.

You saw just now?

Yes, yes... She laughed.

Come on, kid. Do dodo.

Who threw stones?

Ah, it's you?

Oh dear! You see what you did?

No no! We will make a statement.

Yes, yes... "Questa the property" Private!

Campers, go, go!

Yes sir! I go to Venice,

I inform you. But first, I have lunch.

Yes! The coffee is not Italian,
but we shall drink.

In Chamodot is sacred.
We, in the morning, have lunch.

Your beet juice.

Look at her.

Dad, it smells bad.

Sicurezza! -Should any store.

We really cops ass.

Shit! -Come on, hop, hop!

Go quickly! Come on!

Who is that?

I will explain you. -Nice to meet you.

Delighted Miss.

Remove it...

Dad, accelerating.

Are nest-holes, I'll lose the caravan.

What do you do in life? -I used to woofing.

Oh! -In a permaculture farm.

It was really cool at first.

But under the guise of collective

the boss, it was a real dictator.

Yesterday I took my stuff, I crossed myself.

Without knowing where to go.
-And you found us.

I guess it is not us she wanted. Huh?

It's okay? Not too tight at the back?
-No, it's fine.

Emile and keeps an eye on Natasha. Not true?

Oh no! It gave there...

You remember what Nietzsche said?

and I do not care for.

Without music, life would be a mistake.

Your rotten music, it's not a mistake?

Welcome to the crazy.

All set, go!

You know, Natasha? -No.

They are weird, your roots.

You discolored?

Uh no.

I too was Wheaten.

So, it helps a little

to enlightenment.

Yes that's it.

You Tie his hair?

It was he who asks.


It is you who ask?

I'm fine like this.
-And it was you who had the idea?

No, this is Bernard.

Fabrice also, you...

You speak! They not calculate me.

No, Fabrizio was

too brown. And it was beautiful naturally.

Besides, it does not concern you.

You will see when you have kids!


But I hope not serve me of them like dolls.

Rite II.

You do not understand at all.

I read countless books on education.

We do not act at all unexpectedly.

All this is carefully considered.
Eh, darling?

(-You 'beautiful.)

What is happening?

Brakes! Bernard brakes!

So what? -You can see it? This is punctured.

It is flat, that is!

This is the pot-hen we took
at the exit of golf.

relief is called? -No, I have...

I have a bomb to repair tires.

We go to Venice with that? -Not to Venice.

But up to a gas pump.

They repair the tire. Meanwhile, it will

A coffee. -And my concert? We will never do!

You shit with us your concert!

Can not you see we have a problem?

Mr. thinks only of his mouth!


He thinks that his mouth. Shut up! Shut up!

Why you put yourself in states like this?

Vas-y, mount!

You just steal it?

It's just a loan. So did not you
hot date in Venice?

I'm taking my business, I'm coming.

Take me my jacket!


Come on, crawling up!

We start by motorcycle. -What bike?

It is that this bike?


Excuse me sir. You have not seen

from someone with a motorcycle?

No. No...

Whore! It stung me my helmet

and my keys while I was pissing.
I saw nothing at all.

You pissed long?

Yes, I feel great. Which report?

You're like me. You have a small bladder.


Small bladder, not small penis!
I am not allow.

I suspect that you are provided. To laugh

But you tend

to piss very often. Like me.

I talked to a doctor.

Hello. -My wife.

There is nothing to do.


It sucks. We piss all the time.

Looks like a dog abandoned at the roadside.

You're right, you take it. -You're sure?

But yes! We shall pipeauter.
That alone will go.

You go to Venice? -Yes.

Get in. -Thank you.

Yes, go up.

You're only in Venice? -Yes.

I broke up with my girlfriend last month.

But I go

still. -Should not go alone.

Well, no!

We, we will reach our children.

IIs took the train.

Lets' go.

OK, it's there.

The bridge, all right.

Whore! It is where there?

It's a maze, this stuff!

Come come!

Come left!

It's here!

Oh, fuck! -Oh no!

It must be the stage door.

There's no bridge. To do all around. -No...

It starts in 5 min. I have more time. Here!

What are you doing?
-Thank you for everything.

Thank you. -What are you doing?

Can not Chamodot!

They laugh.


That's my brother!

7:30 to Campanile

from Piazza San Marco. -OKAY.

Have fun!

Good morning.

You speak French?

She speaks Italian.

I'm Émile Chamodot. On the list.

What's your name?

His name.

Oh, my name?

Ben Emile Chamodot.


Not on the list.

Are you sure? -Of course.

I'm sure.

I really have to see this show.


I'm a friend of Pauline Despres.

After Pauline.

Yes, she's on the list.

Thank you.

You are welcome.

Good morning.


You are welcome.



Ah non... "Scusi".

They are not possible, the girls!

She must have forgotten that I was coming.

This is normal with the stress
of the concert.

It makes you come and forget you?

Forget about her, too.
To do that to you, it's a moron.

It is here, camping?

Yes, right next to the factory.


Laugh It's the dark side of Venice.

Who here? -Hi.

To laugh


It is not right here?

It is in a small air passage.
This is the only flaw.

With the factory next.

The plant stinks,
but it does not make noise.

Excuse me... Oh!

I present Jean-Michel.


Jean-Michel was robbed of his
motorcycle on the highway.

Hum! -Should there be bastard to do that!

Fuck, yeah...

So we decided, your mother
and me to help him.

How nice.

As he speaks no Italian,

I conducted discussions with "polizia".

It's good. -We'll find her,

this bike, Jean-Michel.

Oh, I not fooling myself.

No, have to remain positive.

Positive. -Oh yes... Yes!

It is saitjamais.

Then Emile, this concert?

Well... it was great.

We'll leave you the tent.
It has rented a mobile home.

Ben... cool.

There are some who are lucky! -Yeah...

Y are others...

Yes Yes...)

A smile!


What's this? It's a gift?

This is the lotion to your hair.

Hey! This is a great Italian brand.

You do not find that here.

Natural target.

Believe me, with that, we are
quiet for a year.

Thank you.

Look, it's not me who invented: you are
much more beautiful that way.

Now, if you want us to stop, we stop.

You say that after buying this card?

Your father, he contradictions.

I had noticed.

What is happening?

You have a number to reach her?

But it is late.

It is not called that.
-In love, there is a rule.


more audacity,

always audacity, my son.

Except that it's not love...
It estjuste friendship.


It works anyway. Hm?

Come on!

Call her immediately.

It will cost you a fortune.

You have no international package.

That's true.

So you know what?

You'll go to the phone booth, that's better.

Hello? -I'm Pauline.

This is Emile. I'm sorry, it's late.

Emile, okay?

Yes, I'm in Venice.

You were in the room? -Yes.

I'm touched. Did you gets off?

Yeah, it was great.

Well... After I expected you to the exit.

I'm sorry.

We went out the back.

I yelled at my father.
He said I played poorly.

No! You've managed phew.

Maybe not though.

So, you have time tomorrow afternoon?

Uh... yes I can arrange.

You come get me tomorrow at 17:00?

I live at 3 Calle San Barnaba.

You sound to "Donadoni." You'll remember?

Yes do not worry. I'll remember it.

You sleep with your cousins?

Um yes...

Where is it?

This is the other side of the lagoon,
boat 10 min.

And that name?


Well see you tomorrow!

I kiss you.

I kiss you too.

A plane flies over the site.

A smile!

Emile, wake up!

I have a great new to tell you.

It's super early, Dad. I sleep!

Emile! I assure you, you're not going back.

Quickly open!

It happened to me an extraordinary thing.

This morning, I was paddling in the lagoon.

It had to be frozen.

Fresh, yes. But listen: it happened to me...

I invented a swim.

A swim?

I do not know if you realize. -Not sure...

It is a swimming...


Very relaxing. Almost motionless.

Very pleasant.

That's why you wake me up?

Do you imagine the money

we can do with this? -You think the guy

who invented the breaststrok
is a billionaire?

Not if he has not filed.

You know comment called this swim?
-Go ahead.


Oyster? But it's not swimming

an oyster.

And the butterfly, it swims?

Well, I'm going back to bed.

Honey, I invented a swim!

(Oh fuck!)

(Oh fuck!)

(Oh fuck!)

Oh fuck!

Bernard! Annie!

My bike, it's back!

Yes, a cop took her the first time.

We signed a paper to not wake up.

And besides, nothing is missing.

That's crazy! This is crazy!

They laugh.

"Think positive" Americans say.

They do not dominate the world for nothing.

That is true.

Sit down, Jean-Michel!

What are you going to do? He gasps.

This may be an opportunity
to remind your girlfriend.

Good idea!

Yes maybe.

The bike, not replace it all. -No.

Anyway, you're an amazing family.

Yeah, it seems.

That is true.

Shoot, you two? Of course.


Wait, wait!

Here. More tight, kids!

Hey, smile!

Photos, you send me to me. OKAY?

Send to me. -OK.

To send. Huh?


Come on, kids!

Uh... Gondolier.

Exchange exchange.

If "you" gondola, "me", giving alarm.

No, no.

Money. -Oh no! Watch the fat.

Bernard laughed.

Very, very beautiful model.


Paris! "Big" serrure.

Bells are ringing...

This is the first. Mounted.

OK, j'arrive.

This is for the ball. You like him?

It's super nice.


We'll find you something.

Is that so?

Yes, come here.


Ah, well! Try that.

Go into the room if you want.

Uh... you sure now? -Grave!

Harlequin was a free man,
a wanderer. I love!

Hello, Emile. -Hello sir.


Approach, do not be shy.

You were at the concert yesterday afternoon?

Yes, it was beautiful.

You're not difficult.

So you're in high school with Pauline?

Yes sir.

Your parents, they do what?

Uh... My mother delivers organic
vegetable baskets.

And my father holds a locksmith company.

It makes the sale


Salesman. VRP.

Rite II.

Again? It's funny.

No, it's not fun.

It must be a hard job.

You love to contradict me.
-And you, you love

bother this poor boy. Sigh

Pauline, my pin!

I not bother, right?

And you live where?

Impasse Marronniers.

Impasse... Marronniers.

This is where the Roma are? -No.

Well... not really. There's just a trailer.

My house is the one next door.

And call me at home one day?

Dad, you help me with my dress?

If there is a caravan,
it's probably not without the Roma.

Dad! Come please.

It inspires. -It's terrible.

To say that people live like that again...

Coming, honey!

A woman speaks Italian.

Annie laughed.

Your father is still in Venice,
but it will soon.

I love you mom.

Me too, my dear,

but leaves the lady finish my hair.

... Annie laughed.

It went well with your friend? -Way.

Ah yes? We should redo your color.

So? -Han!

Say, you've had a heavy hand.

Make up your mind.

You should have let me. Too bad.

Dinner is served! At table!

What bonita!

You look beautiful, my love.

Thank you.

Emile, you come? The pizzas are there!

I stay in the caravan. I want to see anyone.

Whisper fun

Too bad for you!

Good evening.

Excuse me for disturbing you.
I'm Pauline Despres.

Looking Emile Chamodot. You know him?

If you know Emile Chamodot?

Emile, you got the visit.

I'm not here. -You calm down

and you come when you want.

I'm not here. Sigh

You will not want pizza?
-Thanks, I'm not very hungry.

You'll offend me. -He hates being told no.

That is true. -So small.

With a small glass of rose, it goes alone.

It is our pleasure to meet you.

Emile us a lot about you. -Is that so?

Ah yes! -Hm...

I can not say the same for you.

You are his cousins?


No, we're not cousins.

We're his parents.

His parents? -Yes.

Oh, sorry! That is true. Sorry...

You were not with him this afternoon?

Yes, but it disappeared.
I knew he was sleeping in Fusina,

I spoke to the concierge
and he took me by boat.

As it is the only camp I asked "Chamodot".

I should have chosen a bitch:
she would not have found me.

She came so far, can not you
see what that means?

You, you see that this is
the end of the world?

If you went to the dance camp?

Emile will join us.


What are you doing?

Tell me she's hot...

And did you see the face I have!

You do not care. Come.


You were in the shower?

Well yes!

They are huge, your parents.

Your father, I too gets off. I would love

having a family like yours. -What?

Oh no... I assure you not.

But if!

Your father and mother seem to love so much.

Why you're gone all the time?
Because of my father?

No, it was nothing... Do not worry.

You dance?

Leave me alone.

What are you doing? -And you,

what are you doing here? Let's go.

Let's go!

Good evening.

Good evening. -I am the father of Emile.

Your daughter runs

no danger at this campsite.

Relax. Enjoy, it's a great DJ.

Thanks, but this is not the time. Let's go.

As our children attend, we will meet again.

They will not be attending long.

Well, good evening.

Stop, you're hurting me! -Advance.

Hey, Emile...

Why you told Pauline that we were cousins?

You're ashamed of us?
We not suit you as parents?

It's not me who agree as a child.

What? -Otherwise, you teindriez not my hair.

And yes... Yes, I am ashamed!
I am ashamed to live in a caravan,

to look like a fake bleached blonde,

to not have a laptop.

I am ashamed that one is not
a normal family.

But it is no normal people.
You have to understand that!

People just under freaks you, it exists!

Never repeat. -Another!
What are you waiting for?

In your books, you hit his kids, right?

Warning. If I put in another...
-Knock yourself out!

I can not anymore! -Bernard!

Let's go to bed.

That's what I'm doing your shit lotions.

I can not take over this crap.

Me repetitions I was never
more beautiful like that!

Never again! It's understood?

Never again!


You want to eat something?

Do not worry, I'm small-dej.

You leave with us?

No, I'll stay a while.

They were looking for a waitress here.
And the boss wants to take me

for testing. I start tomorrow.

Cool. -Yes, I'm happy.

I'm happy and sad at once.

It makes me all the time.

Good luck to all. -Thank you.


To leave is to die a little.

And to die is far from.

Take care of yourself, Natasha. -Thank you.

Oh, my little cat! She laughs.

Take care of yourself. -Ciao.

Why do not you stay?

I crossed without warning the restaurant.

If I not return, I will work more
in the kitchen.

Already my boss will get high...

You know what?

We will go together to see your leader.

Are you serious?
-I've never been more serious.

You'll hit you 300 km more to take
me to a restaurant?

300 km longer, 300 km less,

to the point where we are,
what's the difference?

Vijay left a message with a comment. Look!

Ah! I like him, this Indian.

Come on, kids!

You think it's time?

But there is no right or wrong time.

If you wait for the right time,
it will never happen.

They sing loudly.

Congratulations, Mom!

Come on, kids! After me.


This morning, it was September.
No new Pauline

all holidays.

When I tried to call his father won.

And she's not on social networks either.

Dude, are you?

It's okay.

It was good, your vacation? -It went.

I'm fucking nothing.

As usual'! -Yeah.

Excuse me...


The family Despres is not there?

No, my good man. They left.

I even think that they arrived in London.

In London?


In London?

Sweetheart. -Hm?

You can put a caravan on the Eurostar?

She wanted me to call Venice

You see striped suit me voice
submitted gondolier

Paddling for a cherry for a kiss

She wanted to be called Venice.
What a strange idea!

What a funny idea!

What a funny idea!

I melted under her exquisite voice

You see my heart submitted.
And the soul enamored Petty,

If they want to call Venice

Take them seriously so well.
Do not try to find better.

Subs: BRigSS