You can download movie script as text or as subtitles:

Vampires (1998) - full transcript

The church has long known that vampires exist. However, it is discovered that a group of vampires are searching for a powerful doom for mankind. The Vatican then secretly enlists a team of vampire-hunters, led by Jack Crow, to hunt down and destroy the vampires before they find the crucifix.


How's it look?

Like a New Mexican shithole.

Perfect spot for a nest.

Let's hit it.

All right. Gio?

Bene dica vow omnipotens deus.

In nomine Patrius, et Filius,
et Spiritus Sanctus. Amen.

- Amen.
- Everything set?

Ready, boss.

Alright, we think we got
a nest inside this place.

Figure at least six goons,
maybe more.

Chances are, we'll find
the master in there somewhere.

Rule number five: If you find
the nest you find the master.

He usually won't leave it
on it's own.

So it's strictly by
the book today, gentlemen.

Questions?

Let's get to work.

- I'll do it, boss.
- My turn.

Anthony?

Easy with that door.
Slow...

and easy.

Sorry, boss.

Jesus!

- What was that?
- I don't know.

Did I wake you up
out there, Montoya?

Relax. Dead body. Bled out
and cold. one on.

Dead body.
Bled out and cold.

Suck it up.

Bambi!

Get it off!

Wait! Hold your fire!

Get it off now!

Now! Fire!

What?

I don't know, Padre.
Hang on a minute.

What's going on
in there, boys?

Hello, fucking Deyo,
what's going on in there?

Yeah, we got a live one.
Female goon.

We'll save her
for you, Montoya.

Open wide, baby.

Go Anthony, stick her!

- Clear! Take that!
- Fire!

Ortega, we got a fish!
Go! Go!

Go Montoya.

We're losing him!

Bambi, reload!

Shit!

Catlin!

Safety on, boss!

- Got it?
- Clear! Clear!

Oh, Lord.

Take over.

Come on! Right here.

Die!

Die!

Fucking die! Die!

Fuck it! Not only ugly,
he smells bad. Oh, Jeez!

Give me the radio.

- Everybody okay?
- Yeah, boss.

Got another one. He's dead.
Send in the cable.

Yeah, give me a minute, alright?

May her soul and the souls
of all the departed...

with the mercy of God,
rest in peace.

Amen.

Nothing like a little head,
eh, Padre?

Okay, boys.
Time to mop it up.

Deyo, Ortega, Bambi. Upstairs.

Catlin, Anthony, Davis.

Basement.

Enjoy the barbecue, baby!

One, two, three, four...

five, six, seven, eight...

nine!...
Goons, man!

It's not a bad day's work.

- You the man!
- Look.

What is it, Jack?
Is something wrong?

Yeah...
Where was the master?

Want us to check it out
one more time?

He's not there.

You don't suppose there's
another nest somewhere, do you?

Sure as hell
better not be.

All right.

- Let's get outta here.
- Get the hookers!

Thank you for all your help.

Yeah Father, I've spent
the last two weeks...

running whores and buying
liquor for these fellows.

- When are they gonna leave?
- We're clearing out tomorrow.

I can't say that
I'm sorry to hear it.

You get that
little package from us?

Yeah, I got it.

Good, then you're happy.

You all work together?

That's right.

What'd you do?

We kill vampires.

I briefed Rome. They're wiring
a payment tomorrow, okay?

- Thanks, Gio.
- Also Cardinal Alba's flying in.

- He wants to meet with you tomorrow.
- Tomorrow is my day off.

Jack... Not anymore.

What'd you think
happened to the master?

I don't know, Padre.

A master won't leave
a nest filled with goons.

What says he's still in New Mexico?
He could be anywhere by now.

Why would he run? It's not
like he knew we were coming.

No, really.
What'd you guys do?

I'm not kidding.
We kill vampires.

Hey, Catlin, tell the lady
what we do for a living.

Kill vampires. Hunt them down.

Kick the shit outta them.

Right.

I know how you feel, baby.
Nobody believes in vampires.

See, the thing is, we know
vampires are stalking the earth.

We also know there's a God too.

We just don't understand him.

Nice party.

Yeah.

You look like you got something
other than me on your mind.

Feel like telling me about it?

I was looking for something
I didn't find.

- That can be a pain in the ass.
- Yeah.

Maybe you should try
looking somewhere else?

I can tell you where you
might wanna start.

Well, Jesus, you're right.

I should've been looking in
a whole different place.

So why don't you get me
something to drink?

And we can meet back in your...

room.

That's the first good idea
I heard today.

Deyo, give me a couple beers,
will you?

You're magnificent, you know?
Have I ever told you that?

- Slow down, Padre.
- No, no, I'm... I'm not drunk.

- Oh, really?
- No.

What are you on, acid?

Doesn't it feel beautiful?

Something you'll never forget.

I know I won't.

- I think we're outta beer.
- Are we now.

I think we ought to
knock over a liquor store.

Hell, why not?
I don't give a shit anymore.

Oh, no, no, no, no...
I... I... I'm...

I... got beer.

Got beer in the other room.

Fucking people. I don't know why
I gotta take care of everybody.

And you.

You...
You don't go anywhere.

- I got plans for you.
- You do?

Jack Crow.

No!

- Quick! The pickup.
- Keys!

Come on! Come with me!

Did he bite you?

Wait!

I can use you.
Come here.

Come on!

Leave her!
She's fucking dead anyway!

Just take her.
I can use her. Go!

Step on it, goddamn it!

- Hit it!
- I'm going!

He's right behind us!

Come on! Go!

Kill him!

You okay?

Can you walk?

You alive? Come on!

Come on.
Come on.

- What're you doing?
- She's going with us.

He just bit her, man!

- She hasn't turned yet.
- Well...

she's on her way!

It's under 48 hours, the telepathic
link with the master won't hold.

So what!

She'll start receiving his
thoughts, seeing what he sees!

Exactly.
Like a surveillance camera.

So we can find him and shove
a stick right up his ass!

I'm gonna use
this piece of shit...

to get to the master
and whoever tipped him off.

I know we were set up.
He knew my fucking name!

- Come on.
- Who set us up?

I don't know,
but I want the son of a bitch.

Can you walk?
Hey!

Wake up! Can you walk?
Are you with me?

Come on!

Do you hear me?
Well?

This ain't my first time
to the dance. Let's go.

Hey, cowboy!

Can I help you?

I have to borrow your car.

Just say, "Help yourself".

- You want me to say what?
- Shut the fuck up! Or..

I'll blow your fucking teeth outta
the back of your head, asshole.

Back off!

Help yourself, boy.

Much obliged, partner.

Let's go!

Get in!

Take her to Apache Springs.
Plaza Hotel.

Hole up there. I'll find you
as soon as I can.

- Dump this thing. Take the Jeep.
- You can't bury 'em all, Jack.

- Get going.
- I need to talk to you!

We're wasting time!

Rule number seven:

Never bury a team member
by yourself.

This comes under
special circumstances.

The whole fucking team's
been slaughtered!

- I can handle it!
- Bullshit! You know better.

- You got any bright ideas?
- Yeah...

we kill the whore, bury the team
togather and head back to Monterey.

If you wanna pull out...

- go ahead.
- I didn't say that.

Somebody's changed the rules.
We gotta do whatever it takes.

We got less than 11 hours,
till the sun goes down.

If you got something else to say,
spit it the fuck out!

Yeah, I got something else to say.
Don't take too fucking long!

I get nervous
when you're not around.

- I gonna need a room, guy.
- For how long?

- A few days.
- It's 375 dollars a week.

Plus 25 dollars
for the cable TV.

- What's the fucking total, guy?
- That's... huh, 400 dollars.

Is that your girlfriend?

No, it's my fucking mother.
Give me the key.

Hey!

Come on. Take my arm.

Hey, wake up, will you?
Let's go!

Jack Crow.

Cerritos at 14th and Santa Fe.
Need immediate pickup.

None of 'em.

I'm alone.

Dead.

Sources into the investigation report
that all the bodies were decapitated.

The heads were found buried
a mile from the murder scene.

The number of confirmed dead
now stands at 19...

with police still combing
the ruins of the motel.

Of course, we'll be
standing by here all day...

to bring you
any further updates.

Forget it.

Ahh... Jack.

Buon giorno.

Come...
Please sit down.

Who's this?

Oh, this is, uh...

Father Adam Guiteau.

Father Adam's in charge
of our archives. A...

bookworm.

And he's completely familiar
with all your activities...

so speak freely.

Tell me what happened.

We cleaned out the nest.

And the master showed up.

No master was ever like this.

Superhuman strength.
Unkillable, like a machine.

We didn't stand a chance.
So, tell me if I'm wrong, cardinal...

but couldn't he be the one,
we always talked about?

The one we knew would
come along one day?

There are
some other developments.

Sad developments.

Tom.

Our Tom. Our Tom Callahan.
He's dead.

And the whole European team
is wiped out.

When?

Three days ago.

Callahans' team was clearing
a large nest in Cologne, Germany.

Local authorities reported it
as a terrorist act.

We found this at the site.

Is he the one?

Yes.

What is this?

A... Celebratum.

It's... uh, medieval Latin,
for "celebrate".

"Celebrate this".

- Celebrate what?
- Well, uh...

We don't know.

I've authenticated the portrait.
It was painted in 1340.

The subject's name is...
was... Valek.

Jan Valek, born in Prague, 1311.
He was a priest...

who turned against the Church
and led Bohemian peasants...

in an uprising, actually
capturing several small towns.

Valek was captured.

He was tried for heresy
and burned at the stake.

But...

after his death
there were reports...

that he was seen
walking at night.

It was said he killed the
living to drink their blood.

They opened his grave,
and it was found empty.

It's the first known case
of vampirism.

A priest.

Valek is not like the other
masters you've hunted before.

He is the first...
and most powerful.

Of our slayers, you are
the only one who faced Valek...

and survived.

I'm going back out.

- You mind if I hang on to this?
- Jack...

I've been in contact with Rome.
The Vatican Council requests...

that you rebuild
your team.

- There isn't time.
- You're to return to Monterey...

recruit new team members...

and try again when
you are at full strength.

Father Adam will accompany you
and take the place...

of poor Father Giovanni.

I don't think so.

Jack!

Jack!

This is nonnegotiable.

Valek is the original.
The source of the disease.

The first vampire created
by the Catholic Church...

- By accident.
- Shut the fuck up!

This was your fight, cardinal.
Now it is mine.

Jack!

Jack!

If you refuse to obey the rules,
the operation will be canceled...

the funding withdrawn.

You have any idea how this...
Valek... knows my name?

Stay close to him.

What's your name?

Do you understand
what's happened to you?

Help me!

Hey!
Don't fuck with me, honey!

I'll snap your neck like a twig!

Now nod your head yes or no.

Do you understand
what's happened to you?

Do it!

All right.

Now I'm going to explain it to you.

First, I'm gonna take
my hand off your mouth.

If you scream...

Good.

Now.

What's your name?

Katrina.

Okay, Katrina.

Here's the score.

I took off your clothes.
I cleaned you up.

I tied you down.
I also saved your ass.

You've been bitten by a vampire.
Remember the party at the motel?

Big guy, pointy teeth.
Really shitty breath.

Don't worry.

It'll come back to you.

A master vampire has a telepathic
link with his victims.

You're gonna help us find him.

While he's sleeping,
we unleash on him.

You're the bait, honey.

Sorry.

I know all about you, Mr. Crow.

I know your parents were
bitten by vampires.

You were raised by the Church
as it's master slayer.

You know the truth is, I didn't
wanna be forced on you like this.

I was supposed to take over
when Father Giovanni retired.

I always dreamed of this.

Ever since I first heard about
you, heard about the slayers.

I want to be part of the team,
You know, just do whatever I could.

For example, if you
wanted to receive...

the sacrament of confession...

Fucking priest!

Who set us up?

Was it you? Who set us up?

Who was it,

Huh?

Who set us up?

I don't know
what you're taking about!

You don't think I'll kill you,
because you're a priest.

You're seriously misjudging
the wrong mother-fucker!

You wanna kill me,
you go ahead, okay?

I don't know what you're
talking about!

I don't.

We'll see about that.

Where're we going?

You have to tell me
what's going on, Mr. Crow.

- Have you ever seen a vampire?
- No.

Now, first of all,
they're not romantic, alright?

They're not a bunch of fags,
hopping around in rented formalwear...

and seducing everybody insight,
with a Euro-trash accents, alright?

Forget whatever you've seen
in the movies.

They don't turn into bats.
Crosses don't work.

Garlic? Stand there
with garlic around your neck,

one of them fuckers
will bend you fucking over...

and takes a walk up your...

strata chocolata while he's
sucking the blood outta you!

All right? They don't sleep
in coffins lined with taffeta.

You wanna kill one?

You drive a wooden stake,
right through his fucking heart.

Sunlight turns them
into crispy critters.

Got it?
See this map?

This map shows
all the encounters...

in the United States,
as far back as the 1800's.

- I've never seen it.
- No one has~

Look at the Southwest.

- See the spiral pattern?
- Yes.

It's a Time-sequence
with all encounters,

you get a logarithmic pattern,
ever-widening.

It's a search pattern, Padre.
They're looking for something.

Do you know what it is?

I heard stories...
when I was young.

Something about a black cross.

About vampires walking
in the sunlight.

Padre.

- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah.

When I was kicking your ass
back there...

- did that give you wood?
- What?

Huh? You get a little mahogany~
from that ebony?

I'm just fucking with you, Padre.
Forget about it.

And what God has given her...

is that she then sees
her guardian angel.

Oh, Jesus!

What time is it?

9:10.

- You want one?
- Uh'uh.

You gotta eat something.

I can't.

I wouldn't mind
a cigarette, tough.

We have to work on this.

The less you eat, the faster the
virus moves through your system.

Virus?

Yeah, that's what I call it.
Nobody knows what it really is.

Poison, Kool-Aid, whatever,
it all does the same thing.

Turns you into a vampire.

What happened to
the other girls at the party?

They didn't make it.

I'm sorry.

So, you remember now?

Yeah, some.

- Why doesn't anyone know?
- Nobody wants to know.

That's how vampires survive.
They're smart.

They keep their numbers low,
live in small bands...

and the real world
never catches on.

Will I end up
being one?

I don't know for sure.

- Probably.
- Ugh...

Un... unless we find him
before you turn, then...

maybe there's a chance.

Look...

here's what we do know.

You're connected
to the master vampire, now.

He's a part of you.

And this link will grow.

You'll never be able
to get him outta you.

Not while he still exists.

Then I don't wanna live.

You may not.

Can I get dressed now?

Sure.

Could you get me a towel
or something, maybe?

It's not like I haven't
seen you naked.

- Fuck it!
- Alright...

easy, easy.
I'll get you a towel.

One towel coming right up.
I won't peek.

Nice try.
Leave the door open.

No way.

A little bit.

Oh, no...

- Don't do it! Damn it.
- Let me go!

Let me go!

Shit!

Stop it!

Look what you did!

- You fucking bit me!
- Ahh... ahh...

What're you, fucking nuts?

Where're you going?

You bite me, huh?
Get up!

Fucking bite me!

Fucking bitch!

Fuck!

Goddamn it!

Fucking stupid whore.

On my way.

Yeah?

Where are you?

What?

I'm fine.

Yeah, I'm fine.

Room 312.

Stay there,
I'm coming up.

Stay put.

I'm Father Adam Guiteau.
You're Tony Montoya?

You look different.

I'm an archivist. I've studied
the team extensively.

Montoya, what's this bruise
on her jaw?

I had to hit her.

She tried to kill herself.

I had to pull her off
the edge of the fire escape.

Then, uh...

I fell through the window.

That's all?

So, why'd you slug her?

I cut my arm
on the broken glass.

I was pissed.
I don't know.

I fucking slugged her.
Who cares?

That's our new Padre.

We've been ordered back to Monterey.
Rebuild the team, start over.

- We're going back to Monterey?
- No.

Callahan's whole team is gone.

Slaughtered.

So it's just us now.

That's right.

Who is she?

Some hooker.

Bitten by Valek. These vampires are
psychically linked to each other.

As soon she hooks into Valek...

we go looking for him.

We have orders to follow,
Mr. Crow.

Yeah, fuck you, Padre.

Language!

Mr. Crow, if you not
gonna follow orders,

I'll have to call
Cardinal Alba.

Excuse me.

Language.

We'll chat about language.
Shall we?

See if this syntax works here.

You don't make a call,
you don't blow your nose...

you don't wipe your ass,
unless I tell you. Okay?

Show me.

- She's up.
- Good.

Katrina?

Can you hear me?

What is that?

There's someone else in here...

someone you're connected to in
your mind, you know who I'm about?

Katrina, what're you seeing?

I can't.

Yes, you can, honey, you're
with us now and your safe.

Now, where is he?
What're you seeing?

It's dark.

All right.
Keep trying.

There's a map.

A circle on the map.

We need a location, Montoya.
Come on!

- I'm fucking working on it, Jack!
- Before she loses him, Come on!

- You wanna switch places?
- Just come on!

Katrina,
listen very carefully now.

I need to know exactly
where you are.

What you're seeing right now.
Details.

No!

- Oh!... He killed a priest!
- What?

- You're safe!
- Priest?

Did she say a priest?
What priest?

He's moving now.

Come on.
Stay with him.

There's a sign...

on a highway...
that says San Miguel.

San Miguel? San Miguel?
Come on, hey, hey...

come on, keep trying!
You have to!

I can't!

- Goddamn it!
- Jack, the link's broken.

What priest is she
talking about? Goddamn it!

I can get a list of all
churches in San Miguel County...

if you'll let me use the phone
and call the archdiocese to...

Get it, call every church.
Find one where a Padre's missing.

Road trip, Montoya.
Your job is to watch this girl.

Goddamn it!

Hey, what's wrong with you?

I'm just tired, that's all.

Is there something
you wanna tell me?

Nothing...
you'd wanna listen to, man.

Yeah, I got a fax this morning from
the cardinals office in Santa Fe.

You're an investigator working
for the Catholic Church?

That's right.
We're looking into a...

possible Nation-wide pattern
of anti-Catholic hate crimes.

- May I?
- It's pretty damn savage.

What about the old priest,
is any of this blood his?

His name is Father Molina.

Sorry.

Listen...

you get something on this case,
you gonna share it with me, right?

- That's right.
- I better not find out different.

You won't.

So far, it looks like all
this blood's from Mrs. Fisher.

We won't know that for sure till
we get a sample from pathology.

Was anything stolen?

- Just Father Molina.
- We found him!

Lord!

I don't get this!

Why come all this way to
San Miguel to attack some...

old... small town priest
and a cleaning lady?

Doesn't make sense, Valek,
didn't feed on either of them.

Father Molina was a
well known scholar...

of early Catholic history
in the United States...

- Who gives a shit, what's the point?
- I don't know what the point is.

I don't know why
Valek killed him.

What's this symbol?

The Cardinal told me
the Church doesn't know.

You and the cardinal
are lying sacks of shit!

Come on, Padre. Help me.
The hour's getting late!

It's a medieval
astronomical sign...

for the sun.

There are seven more
with him now.

Powerful.

Are they masters?

Yes.

Padre...

I'm beginning to like you.
So don't make me hurt you, okay?

Just tell me what you know.

I'll buy you a beer
and get you laid, come on.

If you don't tell me everything,
I'll just start cutting on you.

No, you won't...
You're a righteous man, Mr. Crow.

Besides, I serve
a higher master, then you.

With any secrets
that I keep...

I kept to protect the Church
and its followers, is part of...

that...

- Open your mouth.
- What?

Open your mouth.

Give me your hand.

You better listen to me,
you fuck!

My father kept a secret once.

He'd been bitten by a vampire.

He kept it a secret...
from me and my mother.

By the fifth day,
he was turning.

That night,
he attacked my mother.

And then he came after me.

I killed my own father, Padre.

I got no trouble killing you.

Last chance.

Now open your
mother-fucking mouth.

Open your fucking mouth!

Then prepare to...

What? You ready?
Excuse me?

Valek is looking for an ancient
relic, 'The Cross of Berziers'.

After his trial,
the Church declared that...

Valek was possessed by Demons.

He was taken
to a small town...

in the south of France
called Berziers.

An exorcism was performed
using an ancient...

forbidden form
of a ceremony.

It was long and very brutal.

Something went wrong.

The wooden gate is opening.

The accounts are confused, but
they refer to an inverse exorcism.

The body is destroyed, but
the possessed soul remains.

The exorcism transformed
Valek into a creature...

whose body is dead...
but lives on.

A vampire.

A vampire.

It's a cross.

The stories you heard about
the Black Cross are true.

It was used in Valek's exorcism
and taken back to Rome.

It's known as the Berziers Cross.

The cross was then
shipped to the New World.

It was moved ever since from
one Spanish mission to another.

It's exact location was kept
secret, even from the Vatican.

For hundreds of years it was lost.
Cardinal Alba discovered the name...

of the only living priest who
knew the location of the cross.

Father Joseph Molina.

Cardinal Alba and I came to the
United States to find Father Molina.

To reclaim the Berziers Cross.
And that is all I know.

You're a good man, Padre.

Welcome to the team.

God forgive me.

He found it.

Let's hit it.

Wait!...
Wait, stop the car!

That way.

Hey.

It was here.

You picking up anything?

He's gone.

- You don't look so good.
- She hasn't turned yet, Jack.

- Ahh...
- She can't eat.

Maybe what she really wants is
human blood, what'd you think?

- I said she hasn't turned...
- I heard what you said.

Hey.

Why don't you back off?

What's with you?

What'd you mean, what's with me?
What's with you?

You're being such
a fucking asshole.

What the fuck
is your problem?

You're not going to fall
for this half-dead cunt...

Fuck!

Nice shot.
Wanna try again?

- Stop it!
- Get the fuck outta here!

What're you doing?

We're about to have
one fuck of a fight!

No.

Do you know why Valek
wants the Berziers cross?

Think about it for a minute!

I think Valek wants to finish
his transformation.

The exorcism
was never completed.

Valek was left vulnerable,
able to survive only at night.

So, he...
completes the ritual?

I think... I think
the balance shifts.

For 600 years, Valek has tried to
find a way to live in the daylight.

Fuck me.

Now with the Berziers Cross,
he will.

A master vampire capable to
walk in the sun. Unstoppable.

Unless we stop him.

I guess we'll have to finish
this some other time.

We got eight hours of sun left.
Come on. Come on.

Come on, baby.

That's where he is.

Santiago.

The place looks empty.

He's near.

Hello?

What'd you figure the population
of this shit-joint is? 20?

I'd say 30, maybe more.

Now, the question is,
how many of them are goons?

Our worst-case scenario, half.

15 dead, 15 goons.

We took the whole time Valek's
been here what, several days?

That's right, Padre.

He set this up. Slowly.
One goon at a time.

Now he's got the cross
and the biggest nest...

the fucking
the world's ever known.

What'd we got? Three slayers.

Two slayers.

Time to kill some vampires.

You with us, Padre?

Yeah, I'm with you.

The location.

Where is he?

Everywhere.

Katrina, baby, listen.

Is he in there?

Yeah.

He's in there.

In the dark.

Great. Good girl.

And the best constructed
building in town is?

The jail, of course.

Bingo.

She senses him in there.

- You think she's telling the truth?
- Yeah.

Suppose he's taking control
of her? Let's hope he hasn't.

Then I guess I'll pay
with my life on that.

You're not the only one, amigo.

You're not the only one.

Can you hear me?

I'm sorry.

It'll be all right.

I'll take care of you.

I promise.

It's thirsty.

Think she smells your blood.

I got it! I got it!

Take the woman, Montoya!

Cocksucker! Come on!
Come on!

Help!

Padre, kill it!

Kill it, damn it!

Don't just sit there, kill it!

With the stake!

Kill him with the stake!
Through the heart!

How do you like
your stake, bitch?!

I wonder if there's
another way to the cells?

- I hope not, it doesn't look that way.
- We have to get them...

inside the elevator and make
them come out through the door.

- That means using the cable.
- That's right.

Forget the winch, we'll attach
the cable right to the Jeep.

Do it fast and yank 'em
right out into the sun.

- Someone has to drive the Jeep.
- That's right.

How you expect to lure 'em
in the elevator?

Somebody's gotta be inside.

Escape hatch, huh?

When they get inside the elevator,
one of us goes through the hole.

The other guy up there presses
the button to secure control.

The door is shut.
They get trapped inside.

- But it has to be me.
- What?

You have to be up there
to fire the crossbow.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

You wanna drive,
I'll do it.

I can't drive.
I never learned it.

Okay, Padre.

Light her up and shave your ass.
You're the bait.

Katrina.

Katrina, listen to me!

You've gotta try
to hold on. Okay?

- You seen Valek?
- Not yet.

Anything?

There.

And there.

Okay, I'm ready.

- You gotta be fleet of foot, padre.
- I know.

- I'm not kidding.
- I know.

I used to play soccer.

- Soccer?
- I was captain of my team.

- I'd better be the one in-
- No, I'll be fine.

- You will?
- Don't worry about me, Mr. Crow.

- Just shoot when the door opens.
- You can count on that.

- Padre...
- I know.

- Montoya, he's on his way.
- Hooked and ready, Jack.

What're you doing?

Get back
in the fucking elevator!

Shit!

Get ready, Montoya.
Here we go.

- Jack...
- Padre?

Open!

Montoya, now!

Sayonara, motherfucker!

Pull!

- Padre, you okay?
- Yes.

- Did he bite you or scratch you?
- No.

Okay, come on.

No! Keep that door...
Shit!

- Sorry.
- Come on.

It's going all the way down.

Okay, I'm bringing it up.

- Sorry about the doors.
- No harm, no foul, padre.

- You did good.
- I have to do it again.

We're out of time!

Why aren't the doors open?
What's wrong?

Jack! You should
look at this!

Shit!

Goddamn it!

Montoya!

Go! Go!

Montoya, go! Go!

- Come on!
- Go!

Shit!

- You never said they could do that.
- I didn't know.

Get outta the way!

Let's do it,
you bloodsucking bitch!

Montoya! Hook it up!

Padre, get a spike!

She can't take you with her!

Here comes the sun! Come on!

Jack!

Die!

Die, you fucker, die!

Die, you miserable...

Look at the sun!

We're finished.

No, we gotta go back.

Rule number 10, Jack:

You can't kill a master at night.

It's over.

He's right, Padre.

Let's go.

Hello, Jack.

Motherfucker!

Your war's over, crusader.

Hello, Jack.

From your expression...

I assume you couldn't possibly
understand my presence here.

I'm sorry...
to disillusion you Jack.

As one grows old...

as death approaches...

we begin to question...

our faith.

And I found mine lacking.

Is there a God?
Is there a Heaven?

I can no longer answer this
for certain.

I've witnessed no miracles,
had no visions.

And the prospect of death
terrifies me.

I realized I've only one...
alternative.

And I made a bargain
with the devil, if you wish.

You are truly...

a pile of dogshit, cardinal.

Yeah. That's right.

That's correct, Jack.
And I can live with that.

After I've given Valek
what he wants...

he'll fulfill our bargain.

And I will be transformed
into one of his...

new children.

It's beautiful, isn't it?

Eternal life.

Immortality...

can change your heart.

Valek...

why don't you prove that you can
kick my ass. Come on. Untie me.

Now, come on.

You fucking
pole-smoking, fashion victim.

Come on over here.

- Jack.
- Come on, 5 minutes...

then you can bite my ass, wouldn't you
like that? See me all tied up, huh?

What will silence you?

Come on. Untie me, you prick!

Perhaps this will help.

Apparently, your friend
is one of my children now.

You are alone, crusader.

What'd you want
from me, Valek?

You hate me so, don't you?

But you made me, crusader.

You hate what you've made.
You fear it.

Because it is superior to you.

For 600 years,
I fed on your kind at will.

Why don't you just kill me
and get it over with?

Because you're needed, Jack.

The ceremony is a reenactment
of the original exorcism.

It requires the blood
of a crusader...

and his crucifixion
upon a burning cross.

The climax of the ceremony
must coincide...

with the first rays
of the rising sun.

Sorry, Jack.

Oh, god!
Mother-fucker.

Padre!

Now what're you
gonna do, Valek?

You got nobody
to complete your ritual.

The sun's starting to rise!

You will finish the ritual.

Try and make me!

That-a-boy, Padre.
Fuck with him! Hey, Valek!

You're shit-outta-luck.

Give it up.

Finish it.

No.

Finish it!

No!

Come on, Padre!
My nuts are on fire here!

Come on.
Let's get some vampires.

End of the line, Valek!

You still with us, Crow?

I don't burn so good, bloodsucker.

Give me the cross.

This cross?
Let me just ask you one thing.

After 600 years, how's that
dick working? Pretty good?

Suck this!

Die, you fucker! Die!

Jack.

You can't kill me.

You ugly, bloodsucking fucker!

Die!

Shit!

Jesus!

Listen to me.
It's going to be okay.

I'll be right back. Okay?

Put your head back.

You look like shit, Montoya.

Where you going?

South.

You love her that much?

We make the perfect
couple, Jack.

- You're not leaving!
- Padre...

back off.

No.

Don't make me
come over there...

and beat the shit
out of you, padre!

- Back off!
- He's a vampire, Jack!

Rule number one:

If your partner is ever
bitten by a vampire...

never...

ever let him live.

Padre...

I'm not a slayer
anymore, Jack.

Besides...

the way I figure...

you two got plenty to do
cleaning the rest of it now.

Meanwhile she hides in back of
the van, hiding from sunlight...

while you make it
for the border?

Try to catch it
by nightfall, okay?

I need a vacation, Jack.

When did she first bite you?

Two days ago.

I still covered your ass.

Yes, you did.

I would say I owe you
two days pay.

What'd you say, padre?

You've got two days.

Wherever you go...

I will find you.

I will hunt you down...

and I will kill you.

The girl too.

Vaya con Dios, my friend.

Vaya con Dios, slayer.

Time to slay
some vampires, Padre.

You up for it?

I guess so.

- Just the two of us.
- No, Mr. Crow.

He was always with us.

Fair enough, Padre.

Let me ask you a question.

When you were stabbing
that vampire in there...

- Yeah?
- did you know the wood?

Mahogany.

- Excuse me?
- Ebony.

- What?
- Teak.

Are you possessed by demons?

- A major chubby.
- Language, Padre, language.