Unfair Competition (2001) - full transcript

February 12, 1938

the 16th year of Fascism.

When my father was 20
he moved from Milan to Rome

where he opened our store
on the site of a tailor's shop

founded by my great,
great grandfather

whose name was
Pietro Melchiorri like mine.

While the store of
Lele's father, Sig. Leone

is strictly ready to wear.

It's been open for two years,
ever since Sig. Leone

left his brothers' drapery
and quilt store

and moved next door to us.



Hello, hello.

Hello? Radio Patrol HQ here.

Was that you whistling?
What do you want?

I need help with a history
problem.

Is the Agrippa who made
the belly speech

the one who defeated
Pompey and built the Pantheon?

No, they were two different
Agrippas.

The first Agrippa talked tripe

the one who defeated Pompey
built the mausoleum.

Got it. Agrippa-tripe,
Pompey-mausoleum.

You won't forget that.

UNFAIR COMPETITION

Did you see
our neighbor's done it again?

Now he's even stealing
our signs. Go take a look.



"Men's wear..."

"...also children's wear".

Thank you. Come back soon.

Please remove that sign
immediately.

Which sign?

- The one that says 'also'
- Why?

Because you can't use the word
'also' preceded by 3 dots.

Must I remove the 3 dots?

No, the word 'also'. It refers
to my sign "Men's Wear".

If I close my shutter a little
your 'also' makes no sense.

Great! Close it!
Good idea!

Peppino. Coffee!
It's four o'clock.

Already! I didn't sleep a wink.

I'm depressed, Margherita.

The only time I feel better,
just a little, eh...

is early in the morning,
then I wake up.

You never wake up early.

When I wake up there's
that moment of half light.

Everything's vague.
I'm not even sure who I am.

That's a really good moment.

Then, I remember...
and I feel sorry for myself.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

You know the bitter paradox?

I don't count much,
but I'm still in the way.

Didn't you say there was
talk of a job for you?

If I win the exam.

There are twenty of us.

What's my state of mind
going to be?

I have this terrible weight
hanging over me.

What's the exam for?

A dance teacher... ballroom
and drawing room.

A cut of the inscriptions.
- 8 p.m. to midnight.

My two uncles are so different
it seems impossible

that they have
the same nephew - me.

Uncle Peppino's
my mother's brother.

He's kind of funny and
he doesn't like to work

but he's a great dancer.

Uncle Angelo's
my father's brother.

He's a high school teacher.

Sometimes he comes to the store
in the afternoon

and corrects homework
with a red and blue pencil

that he gives to me
when it's down to a stub.

He says it's quieter here

than at home with my aunt,
their three daughters

his mother-in-law
and two dogs.

Sometimes he and Papà talk,
sometimes they don't.

Listen to this ninth grader.

"The Ancient Romans
of Italic descent"

"conquered an Empire
under their Duce."

"Just like ours! Mussolini's
the envy of the world."

Five for the prose, minus five
for the content, total zero!

The prose is fine,
the content's not so bad either.

This damned regime has stifled
all sense of criticism.

We're becoming imbeciles...
even children are pompous.

What happened to humor?

- Don't ask me.
- You never know anything.

- It's dead.
- What?

Humor.

There are lots of jokes
about the Duce.

That's not humor.
We laugh not to cry.

- Excellency.
- Good day, my good man.

You look very well.

Your coat's ready, Excellency.

Your gabardine too,
there's no better quality.

It's the Prince of
Wales' favorite material.

We don't give a fig for the
Prince of Wales' preferences.

Not only is he British,
he's also a well known pederast.

In fact the word gabardine
comes from "Garbardella"

a 19th century Roman tailor.

See? Everything great
and beautiful

- still belongs to Rome.
- And surroundings.

Could we try
the trousers next?

Careful. Do you know
who that is?

Yes. Someone
to be careful about.

Maurizio Totti Bastocchi...
Italian academic.

Our most famous brain.
The country's master mind.

Listen to this twelve grader.
Did you know that Voltaire

was a cheap philosopher and
illiterate hack?

Tell me later...

Sorry, I'm embarrassing you
as usual. I'll shut up.

You don't have to.
Just keep your voice down.

Who told you about the origins
of gabardine?

It's common knowledge.

Right. You made it up
as usual.

Common knowledge... gabardine

I've seldom seen a coat worn
so well at the first fitting.

Oh, that's impossible,
just impossible.

Zero! Absolutely.

The Duke of Aosta 2 button
fashion, use the top one only.

Let's go over there?
After you.

Ah, an expert's eye!
Those shoes have just come in

Spanish leather, English
design, Italian workmanship.

Here's the fitting room,
with its own mirror.

Papà! The suit!

We have our own tailor's shop
if it needs adjusting.

See how slim he looks?

The husband's the center of
attention? What about his wife?

Judith, bring out
our Bemberg boleros?

Don't you think the shoulders
are a little stiff?

Not at all. On the contrary...

No, no, no, see?

Where can you find
softer shoulders than that?

Good day, Signora Melchiorri.

Good day Judith,
Concetta...

Did you notice? The street
sweeper was late this morning.

Yes, you're right.

Well, back to work... goodbye.

- She's so nice.
- If you say so

she meant I should wash
the stairs again.

Quality flannel...
has a vertical nap.

If the nap is horizontal
the quality's inferior

because it's calendered.
That's all I know.

I do my job as best I can...
with honest dedication.

But for the love of God,
I overheard you the other day

talking about "Le Corvuasie"

- "Le Corbusieur"
- What is "Le Corbiusie"?

Actually, he's an architect

I thought it was a cognac.

I have to go, Papà,
I have an exam this morning.

"Basic Elements
of City Planning."

Good luck.

You know all occupations
are equally as noble.

In fact, in the words
of a famous English historian.

It's the habit
that makes the monk.

- Really?
- Honest.

That's good. One can't know
everything.

But it's better to know
as much as you can.

I'm glad.

Keep up the good work,
we're proud of you.

See you later, son.

She's so good!

A little louder now!

Excellent! What a little monkey
she is! Bravo!

Vibrant! Softly now...

Whirling,
think of the waltz...

Settle down...

Now, take us with you,
come along!

Go on! Up, up,
take us to the apex.

Keep it up, we're almost there!

When the teacher fell over

I was the only one
concerned for him.

Apparently he faints often
during his lessons.

Chiaretta came in
with a tray of pastries.

And he felt better at once.

From Paolo.

A card and a leaflet. Should
I give them to your wife?

Thank you.

- I like that striped material.
- Nice, huh?

Let's keep on looking.

- May I help you?
- We'd like to take a look.

What would you say to
a glass of wine?

- Do you have time?
- Absolutely.

Then, let's go.

We're going out.
We'll be right back.

The hat too?

- Good morning.
- Signor Leone.

I put on weight again.
I can't button it any longer.

If you leave it,
I'll let it out.

It's not worth it. You let it
out 3 times already

- I'll make you a new one?
- I don't need a new one.

- Well, what's it going to be?
- The usual sparkling white.

- You still like it?
- Yes, why?

It's too sweet. It was
father's favorite, remember?

He made us try it
at every opportunity

I used to spit it out
every time.

Good morning, good morning.

Who is that?

A Pole or a Lithuanian.
They say he's a Count.

If he doesn't say so,
maybe it's true.

No, I wasn't being nosy.
This was under your bed

I swept it up. Try to be more
tidy, but that's not the point.

Yes, let's get to the point.

She's certainly pretty, she
attends the conservatory, but.

There are two "buts".
First:

Once the decision's made,
it's forever.

I don't want your father and
the haberdasher fighting again.

Second...

How many pretty girls
with more class, more money

are ready to fall in love
with you and you with them?

Why were you underwater?

I heard every word.

What did I say?

She's certainly pretty.

She attends the conservatory...

- And after that?
- After that what?

"During the exam
at the conservatory today"

"I played for you,
my love."

"In front of all those
musicians and teachers"

"I wasn't nervous,
I was just in love."

"We were all alone,
you and me in the moonlight"

"I got top marks
thanks to you"

"I hope a beat or two
of that sonata and my heart"

"reached you.
Yours forever."

Can't you sleep?

You woke me up.

No, you weren't asleep.

Neither were you.
What's on your mind?

Paolo.

Don't worry, I'm just being
a mother. Children grow up.

They get new ideas,
they get married.

What's on your mind?

We made 25% less this month.

Who's getting married?

If it will help, I'll cancel
the new stole I ordered.

That's not the problem.
It's that haberdasher!

It's all
the haberdasher's fault.

Do you know what
he had the gall to say

to a customer outside
his store last week?

He'd sold her a cheap coat
and as she left, he said.

"You look magnificent,
right out of a dream"

I should have added
"Let's hope you don't wake up".

When you think of the right
thing to say too late

it's called
"L'esprit de l'escalier".

Which means?

That it came to you
on the stairs after you'd left.

Really? I'm glad.

It's not a compliment, you know

I'll cook
that haberdasher's goose

just you wait.

Did the Duce make
the Trevi Fountain too?

No, he didn't do everything.
Some things were there.

May we have
a baked pear, Grandpa?

No, the Trevi Fountain's
a little older

Nicola Salvi made it
200 years ago.

Come along,
we're going to visit the Count.

He's my friend,
Waldbran Treuberg.

Oh, don't call him "Tick Tock".
He doesn't like it.

Hello "Tick Tock".
How are you?

In fine fettle and
very, very busy

that's why your clock
isn't ready.

Meet the world's most
unpunctual clockmaker.

Grandpa says you have
the world's smallest shop.

Smallest? It's the largest.
What else do I need?

Better a cubbyhole...
in your lovely country

than a big store in Vilnius.

Yes, the Count used to have
a big clockmaker's store

in his country

with a valuable
collection of antique clocks

but then it was all destroyed.

Who destroyed it?

- Well, those...
- Not in front of the children.

Let's just say savage beasts!

No need to insult
the animal kingdom either.

How wonderful!

How lucky your children are
to be Romans.

If we had your sun
in our unhappy countries

maybe there wouldn't be
so much brutality.

For you foreigners the sun
makes everything beautiful.

This is Paradise! Ever heard
of the Rome-Berlin Axis?

Ever heard of the Italians?

They sign pacts, but
don't respect them.

They never play by the rules,
not even at cards

I don't find that immoral.
Be loyal...

only with who's loyal.
That's the Italian way

I think it's the right way.
That's why I'm happy here

in my huge, immense shop.

Typical, irresponsible Jewish
humor. I'm not so sure...

Your grandfather is
a born pessimist, children.

He sees catastrophe
everywhere.

- What language is that?
- A language...

that doesn't mince
its words. Come along.

Goodbye.

'Bye, children.

Good afternoon, Excellency.

Now we'll put this...
at a little more of an angle.

- Like this?
- Like that.

"Rock Bottom Prices."

What about this?

Too much eh?

Now start... putting...

- Draped like this?
- Yes, I'll look from outside.

Papà and Signor Leone
had a short truce

but all of us
who read Salgari knew

it was only the calm
before the storm.

Lele and I called the final
clash "The Battle of the Seas".

"Off to the Sea"

"...to Play in the Waves."

No charge to enter. How's it
going? Your wife's inside.

You're cashing in
by copying all my ideas!

You're hurting me. That sign's
stealing my customers

- I agree.
- Thank you, Excellency.

No! You're the one
who's hurting me.

Your Spring Sale
is a month early.

That's against
the rules of trade, isn't it?

You're trying to ruin me!

I don't have to ruin anyone

I have my own loyal customers.

So loyal they change stores
at the sight of a sign.

- There!
- There!

You've been warned!

Everyone off to play
in the waves. After you, sir.

The signs are not the issue.
He has no sense...

...of business ethics.
Damn! I should have said that!

Our sign looks...
brighter, happier.

I'm not so sure.

We even have a sea breeze.

What can I tell you?

Sig. Umberto's is
more elegant... more chic!

- How about the Sultan's wife?
- Got it. Aramis?

Got it. You know
Dragonetti found...

a ferocious Saladin.

Lucky him. Take
this Harlequin. I have two.

Thanks.

Does it hurt, mon trésor?

He's an opportunist worse...
than a crow.

He's going to ruin us...
There's nothing to laugh about.

He changed his window display
during the night.

So did you, Papà

I did it myself because
I'm alone!

Alone! Alone! Alone!
Let me spell it out!

My brother teaches, my wife
reads, my son studies...

my brother-in-law dances and
Umberto works.

Dance is a psychological escape.

Unfortunately I never
studied it. If you like...

I can help you, Umberto.

Get away from
the cash register! Go on!

Umberto's had it!
Umberto wants to study too.

Then, we'll see who keeps
the ship afloat.

Nobody gives me a hand,
nobody lifts a finger!

I hoped I was being useful,
Sig. Umberto.

Not enough! See that lot there?

They're a pack, they work
together, they're ruthless.

You don't give a damn.
Go shopping, go on, go on!

What the hell do you care.
The first person who passes

will help more than all of you
together. The first passer by!

Hey you!

Do you want to be a clerk?

How much does it pay?

Ah, someone down to earth
at last. 15 Lire a week.

- If I say 16?
- I'll say 14.

I didn't say anything. It's
a deal! Just call me Ignazietto.

Hard worker, parents unknown,
fast delivery service

with my powerful Maserati...
just kidding!

What is cloth?

It's, uh, it's a material.

It's a weave of threads
obtained from vegetable fibers

like linen, hemp, cotton

animals fibers
like wool or silk

artificial fibers
like rayon.

Cloth...

varies according to weight,
thickness, weft, consistency.

It can be worked
in knitted fabrics,

patterns, different designs

different colors... on a loom,
a machine or a calender.

What's a calender?

A calender is a press for
smoothing out rough cloth

produced industrially.

Quality cloth
is divided into...

That's enough for now...

Sig. Umberto!
I'm your greatest admirer.

This afternoon, Lele's
grandmother came to his house.

The whole family turned out
to celebrate her 80th birthday.

Grandparents, uncles, aunts,
cousins... and me.

You can't have any...
you're a diabetic

I have to keep my sugar
count up.

No, Papà, you know you can't.

Silence, please. Our
granddaughter will play for us.

Our granddaughter? She's the one
who wants to play.

Ah, what fun!
What happy music!

Grandpa's right, grandma.

I never saw a grandmother
play the violin before.

You finished?

Here it is, it's coming!

Ready?

What do you want?

Give it to Paolo.

I have one for you too.

Where did I put it?

I felt like a postman

I read one of them.
What nonsense Paolo writes!

"Susanna, my love,
every morning"

"when I see your face
at the window"

"that moment is the joy
of my life, yours always, Paolo".

"EIAR, the Italian Radio
Broadcasting Service"

"presents the commentary
of the parade"

"in honor of Hitler's visit
to Rome."

Today, Uncle Peppino made his

greatest mistake
as a brother-in-law.

He bought a ready-made suit
from Sig. Leone.

Take off those trousers!

Leave me alone,
you'll tear them

I won't have a ready-made suit
in my house!

It's your fault. He refused
to make me a suit!

That's true.

He's supporting the competition
with my money.

Your brother's not only
a good for nothing, a traitor!

He's a viper in sheep's
clothing. Come here!

Please, calm down!
Today's a public holiday.

Take off the coat!

- You brute!
- Buffoon!

Who's the victim here?
Who's the torturer?

Take it back!

- Why? It's paid for.
- We don't want it.

We don't take merchandise back

especially when it's been
adjusted.

The gentleman's right.

When you sold that sponger
the suit you must have known

you'd offend this gentleman's
honor. Give him the money.

That's not the point.

No? Father's right,
father knows best.

Here, 280 Lire.

Keep the money, spend it
on medicine for all I care

but don't ever call my
brother-in-law a sponger again.

Then why not let him buy what
he wants where he wants?

- Because it's my money.
- You're contradicting yourself.

Yes, peace and goodwill.
You're the contradiction.

When lost for words, say the
first thing that comes to mind...

You know who does that?
Hotheads do.

Who's a hothead!
Watch your tongue, all right?

Here, take your money

- and go away.
- We're being highhanded, eh?

You arrogant scoundrel.

- Who's a scoundrel?
- You!

Get out of here!

Don't touch me! I warn you,
I can be a raging bull.

You are an animal! Profiteer!

- Big nose!
- Tightwad!

- Sluggard!
- Cheap Roman!

Hulk!

- That hurts!
- Say: I give up!

Throwing your weight round
in my shop, eh?

You making us look like shit,
Papà?

Yes, Papà, you make us look...
like Paolo said.

A Jew's always a Jew.

A Jew? Well...?

- When will you release us?
- When Hitler leaves.

- When's he leaving?
- When he feels like it.

Why have we been arrested?

You're being detained
as a precaution.

Oh, sorry, I thought
we'd all been arrested.

Make yourselves at home, eh?

Your behavior... Come in.

Your scandalous behavior
has disturbed the public order.

And that's especially serious
on this day of national pride

marked by the visit of the
leader of a friendly country.

Melchiorri and Della Rocca,
I tell you frankly...

I won't lock you up

only because you weren't
caught fighting red-handed

since the area police officer
turned up too late.

But Inspector, sir

your deputy assigned me
to escort duty

while he confiscated evidence
at the Paravia bookshop.

Ah yes, of course! The Interior
Ministry has ordered

the immediate confiscation
throughout the country,

and throughout the Empire,
of 'Black Love'

by Maria Volpi, known as Mura

illustrated by Du-Dudòvich?

A love story about a Negro
and an Italian girl.

A work that offends
the national dignity.

Inadmissible in a country
with an Empire in Africa.

And this garbage gets published.

Inadmissible, sir

as you said, it offends
the national dignity.

Tramontana, Laosei, dismissed.

You can go too.

No, you stay here a moment.

Was your difference of opinion,
by chance

provoked by something more...

than mere commercial
rivalry?

In other words,
should there exist

a more precise reason
for your dissent

related to a difference
in racial origins

this office would feel obliged

to defend at all costs
whichever one of you

is unequivocally and
historically of Italian origin.

Do I make myself clear?

If you should have
any secret information

some important detail
in this respect

please fill in
this questionnaire

issued by police headquarters
and return it tomorrow.

I don't have any details
to add in this respect.

I don't understand you,
but as you wish. Goodbye.

- Hello, Boccio.
- Ciao, Gnappé.

- How's it going?
- No complaints.

At last the summer vacation
arrived.

As soon as school was out.

Lele and I should have gone
to the 'Dux' camp

but this year, Sig. Leone

didn't want to send Lele

and I didn't want to go
on my own.

She's coming!
Don't let her see you.

Actually, it's fun staying
in the city in the summer.

Her stockings have a seam
down the back.

So do my mother's.

- That's not the same thing.
- You're right.

The first time I came here
with my mother

she put a drop of perfume
on her wrist

and let my mother smell it

then, she let me too

I shut my eyes and felt dizzy.

There's Miss Mathilde.

'Film' and
'Film illustrated' please.

There you are, Miss. One ten.

Thank you.

Hey, the new 'Adventure' comic!

May I see if it has the
adventures of Cino and Franco?

Gosh! Cino and Franco
fight the cliff cannibals!

'Racial Laws'

'on the Cabinet agenda'

"...forbidden to practice
as a journalist"

"doctor, lawyer, notary,
civil engineer, architect"

"to teach in schools,
institutes, universities."

"Other restrictions
and seizure of property"

"will be published
in the official gazette."

Just as well I didn't listen
to my father.

He wanted me to be a doctor,
a lawyer.

I could see this coming

- since Hitler's visit in April.
- May.

Alright May, everyone fawning
over him.

Don't they have any brains?

That shit Mussolini has
apple cores in his head?

I'll accept apple cores,
but no names please.

These are public premises.
'Evening, your Excellency.

Apparently there are exceptions.

Yes, for members of
the Fascist Party before 1924

or for veterans
of the Fiume campaign.

Hurray! We'll all stay ahead
of the game by applying!

It's not so bad!

In Italy they make laws,
they don't respect them.

That man is right, this is
the land of exceptions

like they say, the art
of getting by reigns supreme.

Where? What are you talking
about?

No more wine for the Count,
Boccione

he's drunk as a lord!

No, I'm not. All I'm saying
is that in Italy...

everything's possible.
For example.

They want to rescind
my trading license

because I immigrated
here after 1919.

Tragedy? No, comic opera!

I gave my last gold watch

to a top foreign
office official.

He'll change the entry date
in my passport.

Or so he says.

What do you think?
Is it possible?

If you ask me he stole the watch
and you're out of business.

That's possible.

Next round's on the house.

Don't worry

you heard the Count.
Everyone gets by in the end.

There's Lele!

Lele and Pietruccio!

Come on in!

Come here. Get a chair!

You're out on the town, huh?

Our friend's a barrel of
laughs. What were you saying?

That this country's full
of shit.

- Hey, I said no names.
- Oh, shit's a name?

That's her husband?

- Whose husband?
- The perfume seller's.

- What are you saying?
- Nothing.

I dreamt about her last night.

So did I. If he finds out!

A drop for you too.

'Evening.
Anyone seen my son?

Come on, it's late,
time to go home.

A glass of white wine,
Sig. Melchiorri?

No thanks, it's dinner time.

Finish your soda,
say thank you and come home.

Good evening.

- Are you all right?
- Never felt better.

You always say that.

Then, it must be true.

You look a little down

I'm not down.
What do you mean?

Your hand...

Mamma mia, it's heavy.

It's off too,
think if it was on!

Careful around the corner.

I'm exhausted.

That's enough, it'll curdle
in its stomach.

Hurry! It weighs a ton!

Don't break the valves, huh?

Hey, what's the matter?

Come on, it's just a radio!

I was looking forward
to La Boheme on Friday.

Don't worry,
I'll sing it for you.

If you don't watch out
they'll confiscate you too.

I'm going for a walk.

- Name?
- Romolo Di Segni.

A Marelli radio set

- 5 valves.
- Who cares?

"We have undertaken
to erase"

"to erase from the wall
in question"

"the words 'only idiots read'."

Put it over there!
Mazza, make out the receipt.

Why are you here?
Who's minding the shop?

Susanna.

Ready? "We did not think it
opportune to remove"

"leaflets stuck on the walls
of some buildings"

"with the declaration:
A Jew lives here."

"An anonymous gesture
of approval"

"of the restrictive measures
adopted this year."

"Nothing else. A Fascist salute"

"signed Inspector
Vincenzo Colligiani."

Good day, sir. Excuse me,
but I have a question.

Why must we hand over
our radio sets?

Why can't a Jew listen
to the radio? Does the EIAR...

broadcast subversive programs,
non-Aryan music?

I demand an explanation.

You're in no position to demand
anything

I demand an explanation.
It's my right as a citizen...

and as an officer
decorated by the State

for courage beyond
the call of duty

in the wake of the Messina
earthquake in 1908.

You're trying to make it
a purely personal problem.

I didn't pass the Law.
There is an authority...

"In defense of the race"

above us mere pawns,
that it is our duty to obey.

You call that an explanation?

Facts are facts. You're stealing
our radio sets.

No-one's stolen anything!
They're in temporary custody.

What about 'The 4 Musketeers'?

Where can my grandson and
I listen to it? Here?

That's the way things are.

You're wasting my time
prattling about radio programs.

- Don't you have a piano?
- Until you confiscate that too!

We have work to do here.
If you'll excuse me...

- Let's go, Leo.
- Please!

Talk about impudence!
I'm astounded!

So am I, sir.

We're all astounded!

I'd like something
a little softer.

This is our selection, I told
you the prices, when you...

Don't you have any pastels...
like a pale blue silk?

No. Nothing in pale blue,
dark blue

light blue, turquoise
or periwinkle, so...

Excuse me, I was just asking...
politely.

I'm telling you politely
to try elsewhere. Good day.

I see, very well.

Signora Di Veroli... don't leave

maybe I have just the thing,
let me show you.

This is a georgette...

crepe de chine,
feel how light it is, eh?

In lilac... it hugs the body

doesn't wrinkle...
it's divine.

I love it.

See how it enhances...
the color of your hair?

It's perfect.

And I'll give you a 30%
discount.

Thank you...
it's for a chemisier.

Measure off two and
a half meters.

How's your husband?

Not so bad.

He looked well the other night.

- You look well too.
- Yes, not bad.

Wrap it up.

That comes to 35 Lire
instead of 50.

Here's your packet.

- See you soon.
- You've been very kind.

They never give discounts
like that in their shops.

They who?

Oh, for heavens sake,
you're the boss.

You could have made it 40%,
or better still 50.

- Imagine losing your head over...
- Over who?

Well, she's a traitor.

Apart from the fact that
nobody's losing his head

who on earth told you
Signora Di Veroli's a traitor.

Didn't you hear her?
"It's for a chemisier!"

It's called a shirtdress
or a smock...

Besides everyone knows
they're traitors.

Who gave the Spanish Bolsheviks
money to buy guns?

Who's been telling you
all that rubbish?

You should be better informed.

Don't you know whitewashers
are being exiled?

- Who?
- Whitewashers.

I like the way you work,
but not your conversation.

Put the bolts away
and hold your tongue. Alright?

Me? All I said was...

Silence! Do your work
and be quiet!

Anyway, if I...

Bari, Catania, Ancona...
by following Olympia,

my girlfriend, I saw
all of Italy except Switzerland.

Why did Olympia travel so much?

For her job.
15 days here, 15 there.

And then?

In Cecina one of her customers,
a sleaze, stole her

and I ended up in jail
for political reasons.

- What did you do wrong?
- I punched the sleaze

who was secretary
of the local Fascist Party

I could write a book.

- And then?
- I was jailed again...

In jail I met men
I admired, men with balls

politicians, professors,
doctors.

Want to know why I never
learned anything?

I got the general idea,
and I was working on it

but they released me too soon.

My detention period was up,
so I never got anywhere.

Oh, oh, stormy weather
on the high seas.

- Wait!
- Leave me alone!

Go back to your friends
at the Caffè Esperia.

For the love of God!

Why were they trying to be
so funny?

Because they're idiots...
you heard them.

Of course I did.
All that stuff about Jews.

They were joking.
It was just idle chitchat.

Then why did they start it
when they saw me?

- They didn't know.
- What?

What?

That I'm Jewish.
Why didn't you tell them?

Because... it doesn't make
any difference.

Nowadays it does...
or you would have told them.

Susie... you're just like
anyone else for me.

You're just like
anyone else too.

Good evening Sig. Umberto.
'Evening Professor.

Something wrong?

Nothing.

My colleague, Elio Carpi...

has to leave the school
because of the new laws.

He said goodbye today.

He told us "At 50,
I find out I'm not Italian".

We told him

that it hurts us to see him go.

I gave him an 1815 edition
of the 'Iliad'

What does 'Ah' mean?

What do you want me to say?

You have to ask?
Don't you know?

Don't you have an opinion?
Do you have to be told

what you're supposed to say?

Very well!
Do as you always do. Eh?

Just say what your
newspapers say. All right?

Everything's fine,
everything's timely, proper

under control, noble,
patriotic, heroic... fated

inevitable, incorruptible,
imperialistic!

Is it my fault?

No.

What should I have done?

Protested under
the Duce's balcony?

Should I have resigned...
in solidarity?

And brought my family here
for you to support?

- As if you don't do enough already.
- I don't do anything.

Not true. Maria says
you've been paying our mortgage.

Hurray for the family,
the Italian's scapegoat

reliable, punctual, ever present.
Are you happy now?

What can I say?
You're saying it all.

Ah, yes! You belong
to the silent majority.

When they forced you
to join the Party

to renew your license,
you kept your mouth shut.

Remember these signs
"No politics here"?

Sure! We only talk sport!

What about when they abolished
the handshake?

It was better...
shaking hands is unhygienic.

It spreads microbes, TB,
typhoid, brotherhood.

Yes, brotherhood!
That's a joke!

The Party forbids brotherhood.
Period!

You know what, Umberto?

We're not brothers,
we're Fascists.

Once you told me to go to hell,
now it's my turn

I'll accept that.

Maybe you're right.
I'm confused.

That's normal.

I'm confused too

as you can see.

My cousin's fiancé

at the police station
at Ponte Milvio

says they have an office
for reporting Jews

using phony names.
No-one's been turned in yet.

Let's hope they get reported
in droves.

Jobs will be easier to find.
I might get one at last

I'm qualified.
Is it ready, I'm late?

You're not qualified
for anything, you sponger!

You're not employed

because you're incapable.
You qualify as a parasite!

You little prick!

Ah, at last an honest
opinion of me!

He's always honest with you.

Be reasonable,
you know you irritate him.

He irritates me, but I know
how to keep my mouth shut.

My day will come.
I have contacts in high places

I've applied
to the right people.

If I'm accepted, things
will change in this house.

Yes, just you wait and see!

Wash your hands,
it's suppertime.

F. 5

Splash! Water!

B. 2

Bulls eye!

You don't know how to do it.

Put your tongue
between your teeth.

Forget it.

She doesn't go
to the Conservatory any longer.

Does the teacher who faints
still give her lessons?

I haven't seen him
recently. Your turn.

B. 7

Cod liver oil time

I brought you some pastries too.

Why was she crying?

She has to go home.

- Isn't she happy?
- She doesn't want to go.

Crispina's pastries
aren't as good as this.

I don't want to go.

I love you all.

All of you.
How can I leave Lele?

Please Sig. Leone,
let me stay with you.

How can you be so stupid?

You can't stay, understand!

Have you got sawdust
in your peasant's head?

Members of the Jewish race

can't employ domestics
who are Aryans.

We can't have a maid who
belongs to another religion.

Is it my fault
I was born a Christian?

Is it my fault?

Forgive me, Concetta,
I love chicory sandwiches.

My poor husband used to do
the same thing.

It was his favorite treat.

Garlic and red peppers...
sheer paradise!

Signor Umberto.

No offense intended, but...

if the Duce forbids you
to have a Christian clerk

I'll go sign up
at the synagogue

I'm sure they'll take me.

They'll put you in an asylum.
Don't be stupid!

The Duce says it's the Jews
who can't hire Christians.

And I'm the one who's stupid!

"Victor Emanuel III, King of
Italy, Emperor of Ethiopia".

"By the Grace of God and
the Will of the Nation decrees".

"No school of any order
or grade"

"may enroll students"

"of the Jewish race".

Hello, Angelo.

What's the matter?

"Accidental death of a teacher."

"Prof. Elio Carpi
late of the faculty"

"of the Ruggero Bonghi
high school"

"died last Wednesday
of carbon dioxide poisoning"

"caused by a defective
paraffin stove."

Wasn't he your friend?

"Defective stove" Ha!

If you think it was suicide,
then say I helped him.

That he lit the stove
with the "Iliad" I gave him.

Don't be stupid.
What are you saying?

Everything is the result
of cause and effect

dwelling on the aftermath
is pointless

before the end there's
always a beginning.

Were we friends?
No, I wasn't his friend

if I had been,
I would have been there.

You've always had your own
point of view.

But facts are facts.
Regardless of the point of view.

Yes, points of view
don't change anything.

We have the courage
of our convictions or we don't.

Like me?

Yes, if it helps you feel
more intelligent than others,

eases your conscience and
gives you a steady income.

But then you accept
that people kill themselves

so we're better off without
your kind of intelligence.

Look, better him,
coherent, no alibis

indomitable, predictable.

At last some words of wisdom
in this house.

You've been converted...

a sincere pat on the back.

This is a time
for pressing decisions.

Rats and turncoats
have had their day

and so have neutralists...

He says we have to clean
house and we will.

You can bet on it!

Coffee, Angelo?
Two coffees, Crispina.

One coffee.

This is my house not a café.

Crispina... make coffee.

My dear Margherita.

Come on, Pietruccio...
we're all at table.

What are you doing in the dark?

Darling...

I'm sorry about Lele too.

You can finish your
Meccano bridge in the afternoon

and do homework together
even if he's changed schools.

But why?

In life, darling

bad things happen sometimes.

Luckily, we're Catholics.

- Do you have a light?
- In this rain?

Mr. Peppino's become such
a fine man, hasn't he?

If you say so.

He really showed what he's
made of. He's just like Ciano.

You see?

Yes, don't you have
proper shutters?

Gratings... Why?

So people can see the window
when we're closed.

It's obvious then.
You want more, you risk more.

There are idlers around
with nothing better to do

they see a nice window and...
it's just a prank.

You think so?

It's obvious. Anyway
we'll make out a report.

We were all kids once...
"He, who is without blame..."

I'd say...
this is an open and shut case.

Who never threw
a pebble at a window?

- Here's the pebble.
- See that?

Just small enough

to pass through the grate.

Why give it to me?
You call that evidence?

There's no mystery here.

Write... act of vandalism
by unknown party

I'd write: act of vandalism
by unknown thugs.

In this case "unknown party"
means just that.

There are no honest parties

who are vandals, right?
They're unknown, period!

Do you think whoever
did this is not a thug?

Mind your own business.
Go back to your shop!

The rest of you break it up.
Nothing happened.

Come on, move along.
Nobody's dead.

Get 'em out of here,
Tramontana!

Good day, Signor Leone.

Good day, Umberto.

Is this how it started
in your country?

Who knows why the only time

the Italians respect
an alliance it's with

the cream of all shits!

But you Italians are different,
you're not like them.

You're just pale imitations.

If you imitate a thug,
you become a thug. Blockhead!

You're the blockhead!

The world has more
Italian emigrants than Jews.

That's why Italy
can't consider...

our presence illegal...
like they do in Germany.

Tell me something

did they backdate
your residence date?

No, they took my license away.
I have to close.

But I think that
with an extra tip

the official who took
the watch

will return my passport
with an American visa.

With an extra tip, huh?

Yes, I'll go to America
and never see you again.

Hey, you... just a second!
How big a tip?

At least 300 Lire.

Ah, 300 Lire.

Aren't you afraid
they'll steal it?

How can they?
I don't have it.

That's 300

I record everything, Jew,
don't worry

I'll take it straight
to the official.

Let's meet at the Viennese
concert café

- you can buy me a hot chocolate.
- No, it's on you.

Very well...

His Excellency left it.
Many shops show it already.

"This shop is Aryan".

Well, they're not
my kind of shops.

Get rid of that sign!

Go on! I never want
to see it again!

I didn't hear you come in,
Excellency.

You were more concerned about
a printing job.

This is telepathy. Your
carded cloth arrived yesterday.

This is not the moment

I came to pick up a bottle
at the wine shop. Good day.

He takes the car to go
to the wine shop. 40 meters!

Why didn't you say
he was right behind me?

You could have coughed,
raised your voice to greet him.

How could I?
Your instructions are

to keep my voice down
in front of customers.

While you play dumb,
we've lost a loyal customer.

It's all your fault.

Oh, now it's my fault?

I can't even open my mouth.

Every word
is used against me.

A momentary distraction
and they ruin you. Why?

Because we want to be
the Germans' toadies.

Sorry, but where do
the Germans come in?

If the Duce does something,
it's 'cause it's right.

You think what's happening
in this street is right?

You think these idiot signs
are right?

Are separate hospitals,
schools right?

Is it right that Jews must hold
their funerals after sunset?

I don't give a damn
about losing a good customer

even if it's going to cost me
dearly.

You know what I think of you
and your kind?

You can drop dead, go to hell
or worse if you like!

You astonish me, Sig. Umberto

I astonish you!
Here, take your hat

your jacket,
your purse and leave.

Instead of coming to work
tomorrow

go and report me
to the shop clerk's guild

I'll lose my license and
that'll be it. Go on! Go!

Here's Sig. Tullio's coat,
the cutter says that...

I went too far with...
with the clerk. I fired her!

- Oh no, with all her problems!
- What problems?

She supports her parents.
Her father plays poker.

So what?

He's a compulsive gambler.

Not to mention her love life.

What?

She's in love with you.
Haven't you ever noticed?

She says you're more handsome
than Amedeo Nazzari.

If she knew I told you,
she'd kill herself.

Maybe she'll kill herself
anyway.

Don't be like that, Signorina.

Don't make a scene.

Me? I'm making a scene!

Sig. Umberto... Good evening.

Let's go to my room

I'm happy today.
Out of the blue, Papà...

asked me to go with him
to see Sig. Leone

who is suffering
from an ulcer.

You have a visitor.

- What a nice surprise!
- What a nice house!

How are you, Signor Leone?

Let's dispense
with the formalities

and start out
on a first name basis.

- Why not?
- If you don't mind, of course.

How are you, Leo?

What's wrong with you?

Heartburn, cramps.
I might need an operation.

But your visit has given me
an appetite.

Stockfish and chick peas
for dinner, Judith.

He's always joking.

It's good to keep
your spirits up.

- May I offer you an aperitif?
- With pleasure

- I'll have one too.
- You'll have a tamarind tea.

- Lots of ice, a drop of water.
- Lots of water, no ice.

She's tough.

Marriage contract.

I don't smoke.

Oh, goodness, Judith,
you interrupted us!

I'm sorry.

Don't be sorry,
he's joking. Cheers.

You know something?
Our Susanna and your Paolo

no longer see each other.

Did you know they were seeing
each other?

Yes, I mean no.

You think they were...?

It's probably just
a lover's tiff, right?

No, it's over.

They were seeing each other,
now they're not.

Maybe Umberto understands
that now, Judith.

They were seeing each other,
now they're not

I'll leave you alone.
Don't smoke!

Me?

Is your wife well?

Yes, quite well. A little
concerned about her brother.

Why? What's he done?

He shot himself cleaning
his pistol in the barracks.

Is it serious?

Well... he does risk losing
his foot.

He didn't know
what he was doing.

The gun went off...
and hit his foot.

You know, he's just a...

Sorry, excuse me.

They're getting along
like a house on fire.

You can tell they've grown up.

I have an idea.

Let's hear what you think.

They use administrative
codicils and loopholes

to force us out of business

and then buy our licenses
for peanuts.

The Sermonetas closed,
the mattress factory too

now the Di Veroli perfume shop
has closed.

Our Count,
the watchmaker closed.

- He left.
- For America?

For an interment camp
in the north.

I didn't know.

Where did Signora Di Veroli go?

Maybe she just changed
streets. Let's find her

I've had an excellent idea.

My store fittings,
unsold goods, etc.

you make a bid,
I'll just say yes... Eh?

But if you offer me too little,
I'll say no

Rome!

Maybe I should have stayed
in Milan.

But I like this street.

So do I.

Even if you accepted
peanuts... I'd say no.

Why?

Because the shop's yours,
you have to keep it.

Thank you...

clothier!

Don't mention it...
tradesman!

He's in good spirits,
on the mend, eh?

He's got nothing wrong.

The doctor says it's
psychological, just nerves.

Then why can't he have
an aperitif, stockfish?

To teach him a lesson.

How did Lele seem to you?

He's fine. Why?

He st-stammers a little

then he ge-gets over it.
See? I do too.

Let's go. Say goodbye.

I found this lightweight
wool for you

for your architecture exam.
Try it on.

A new suit for every exam?
I have 15 to go, Papà.

Well, we'll skip some.
Try it on

I want to see how you look.

Button it.

Perfect.

How's it going with Susanna?

A good match.
She's nice, intelligent...

Yes... that's why she told me
to go to hell.

Why?

Because I'm a prize idiot, Papà.

There are a lot of us around
these days.

Who's "ton beau commissaire"?
Why speak French?

If it's so Crispina can't
understand, I don't either.

My brother, your scapegoat,

will be in hospital
for six months.

I hope that makes you happy,
because I've had enough.

- I'm always happy.
- Sure!

I heard you up here...

when you were yelling
at poor Mathilde.

Even though she's in love
with you

she's the kind
who'll report you

I just hope they close down
the shop next door.

Once the Jew's gone,
you can relax.

Sig. Leone's shop
is closed.

His Excellency,
Cavaliere Bonavigna bought it.

They say he's going to open
a jewelry shop

I think
His Excellency's feet stink.

On Sunday I'll take Fang to see
Lele at his Grandma's.

She lives in the Ghetto
in Via Della Reginella.

We called the kitten Fang

after Cino and Franco's panther.

Fang's half mine, half Lele's.

Forget it, it's always the same.

The best people leave
or go to jail. God Duce!

God Duce?
The Duce is God?

No. God's God,
Duce's a curse word.

He needs rice and carrots
once a week, for the runs

I know.

Grandma's house
is already full up

now we're moving in

there's no room at all,
if not I'd take you with me.

It's a proven fact

once you drink
cod liver oil together

you're friends for life.

Translation: Nick Alexander
Subtitles: Issaverdens Snc