Two Tails (2018) - full transcript

After becoming best friends, a beaver and a cat embark on a dangerous mission to rescue their friends who were abducted by aliens.

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Why are we here?

Maybe we should turn back?

This is the designated sector.

Got it?

Got it.

These are aliens.

They are going to play
a key role in our story.

This is Zaca.

Zuc.

And this is Zic.



And what are we gonna do here?

Any ideas?

Look, guys, we have a
message from the Center.

Attention, you
have entered the solar system.

As legend has it,

our ancestors hid a
multipurpose energy source

on one of the planets.

It emits a special signal.

Your mission is to
locate the carrier

and then return it to us.

That's the only way
our planet can survive.

Let's make our
planet great again!

Let's go!

- Oh.
- Okay.



Here I am.

Hi everybody.

My name is Baz, and I'm
going to tell you a story.

A very interesting one.

To be honest, you might
think it's incredible,

and I bet you won't
believe it at first,

but it really happened.

And you should know
that it's the truth.

I swear on my cap.

This is the beaver.

His name is Bob.

He's the most conscientious
beaver in the forest.

Let me sing this song
for the bridesmaid!

Hey, hey.

What are you doing?

Let me finish the song!

Wait!

Hold on!

Gimme my guitar back!

Not good enough, huh?

What do you know about singing!

One day, I'll become famous

and everybody will
know about me.

Hey, hey, w-w-wait!

Hold on!

Gimme my guitar back.

And this is the cat.

His name is Max.

He wants to become famous,
but, frankly speaking,

without much success.

Well, this is how it all began.

I'm flying, save me!

I'm flying?

Hey hey!

Woo hoo!

♪ Ta ta tum tum tum

♪ Tum tum

Huh?

Oh my.

Oh my.

Oh my God!

Oye.

Hmm?

Ah!

A tiger is a very
dangerous animal.

It is especially
cruel to beaver.

Time to sleep.

Hmm?

What is it?

Well, hmm.

Huh?

A zebra?

Oh no, an elephant?

No.

A tiger?

Tiger!

Hello.

Tiger!

Oh, it better be a zebra!

Huh, who are you?

A cat.

My name's Max.

And where's that tiger?

I don't know.

Could I stay for the night?

I'll sleep near the door.

I'll sing you a song
if you want, huh?

Oh.

♪ At first I was afraid,
I was petrified ♪

♪ Kept thinking

♪ I could never live

♪ Without you by my side

♪ But then I spent
so many nights ♪

♪ Thinking how
you did me wrong ♪

♪ And I grew strong

♪ And I learned
how to get along ♪

♪ And so you're back

♪ From outer space

♪ I just walked in

♪ To find you here

♪ I shoulda changed

♪ That stupid lock

♪ I should have made
you leave your key ♪

♪ If I'd known

♪ For just one second

♪ Without that look upon your

Mmm hmm?

Ah.

♪ Back to bother me

♪ Go on now go

♪ Walk out the door

♪ Just turn around now

♪ 'Cause you're not
welcome anymore ♪

Elephant?

No.

Zebra?

Uh uhn.

Beaver?

Right!

Beaver.

Huh?

Ah ha!

Smart home!

So this is
how Max ended up

living in the Beaver's house.

And at this very time,

absolutely extraordinary
events began to happen

in the depths of
the Solar System.

We've traveled across
half of the solar system,

and still no signal.

Yeah, no signal.

Maybe we should turn back?

Never give up.

I turn on the onboard computer.

The highest
probability of locating

the energy source is
on the third planet

from the big star.

It's called the Blue Planet.

Let's go!

Full speed!

Sing.

One, two, three, four.

Ouch!

One, two, three, four, five.

Ouch!

Mmm?

Hmm.

Wha?

Oh my, I can't handle
this thing alone.

Quite often fishermen
find bottles in the sea.

And if there is a map
inside such a bottle,

then it might lead

- to a hidden treasure.
- Max, are you sleeping?

Max!

Hmm?

Oh what again.

Max, help me uproot this tree.

I want to build a sawmill here.

Sure, sure, just a sec.

As soon as I fish out
this bottle from the river

with a treasure map inside.

I'll be famous at last!

Everyone will know me!

♪ Da da dum dum da dum dum

♪ Ya da da dum dum dum

♪ Ya dum dum dum dum

♪ Hmm hmm hmm

♪ Dum dum da dum hmm hmm

♪ Dum dum da da

♪ Da da dum

♪ Da da dum mmm

Oh, ah!

Oh.

Treasure, treasure!

Yes, yes, yes!

But where?

Under this tree?

Right!

Ah ha ah ha.

Rich, rich, rich!

Max, do you need any help?

No no no no, I'll
manage, thanks.

No way I'm sharing
my treasure with him.

You're sure?

Okay, you dig and
I'll take a rest.

Treasure!

My treasure!

Wow!

What is this anyway?

The signal from
the energy source.

We found it!

We'll be heroes!

We'll make our
galaxy great again!

We're being followed!

It's Scratchers.

Turn left!

Do it!

Turn right now!

Give it to me.

I can do it!

Ah!

A meteorite!

Max, what happened?

Huh?

Holy Beaver, what's that?

Run for your life!

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Did you see?

What a strange language!

Hey, Bob, who are they?

Ah ah ah achoo!

Look!

Hey, Vic, are you
sure there was a signal?

Yeah, of course, bro!

I thought being an
ufologist is cool.

We'd look for
UFOs, chase aliens,

get famous, become rich.

But we've been looking for
three years and still nothing!

We're on the right track.

The arrow spins like crazy!

Well, it shows nothing now.

You didn't dream it up, did you?

Dream it up?

You saw it!

They are close, I can feel it.

Yes, look, look!

Right!

Turn right, right!

Drive on!

Now left, left!

Turn right!

No, left, turn left!

No, right!

Drive on!

And what are we gonna do now?

You push it from
the front end,

and I'll jump behind the
wheel and back it up.

Oh come on.

Why should I push it?

Oh, well, I mean, I
mean, you're stronger.

You always get
the easiest part.

Come on, push harder!

Come on!

And again.

Stop!

What are they talking about?

Well, who knows.

Boom boom.

Boom boom.

Boom boom?

Maybe we should
show them around.

This is our house.

We live here.

This is our watermill.

The river pushes this wheel

and the watermill
grinds the flour.

Oh!

Got it?

Stop!

Here's where I will
put my sawmill.

To cut wood.

Boom boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Come on!

Who saws like that?

Boom boom.

Boom boom.

Are you trying to
teach me how to saw?

Ah ha!

I was cutting wood when
you were not even around.

Hey, Bob, listen.

They don't care it all!

They came from another planet.

From the depths of the universe

and you're talking about wood.

Maybe they need to
find out about Earth!

Our civilization is a
civilization of brave discoverers!

In times of Ancient
Greece, we invented wings

and reached the Sun.

We are a civilization
of inventors,

such as the Montgolfier Brothers

who were first to
conquer the sky

in a hot air balloon.

A civilization of sky champions

that built and flew
the first airplane.

A civilization of space
heroes who landed on the moon!

No, Max, you're
telling it all wrong!

This is how the story goes.

Truly our civilization

is a civilization of builders.

They created the great
pyramids in Ancient Egypt.

Their most remarkable
masterpiece

is the Great Wall of China.

Its length is more
than 20,000 kilometers.

It can be seen even
from outer space.

Builders discovered
new technologies.

They created magnificent
and strong fortresses

and built a tower with
the most accurate clock

in the world, the Big Ben!

They established
high-rise skyscrapers

and established a statue
of freedom in America!

They created the most beautiful
monument in the world,

the Eiffel Tower in Paris.

And many buildings and cities!

Wow, unbelievable!

Now you know, huh!

And you mumble about
your hot air balloons.

High five!

What?

Huh?

- Uh uh.
- Mmm mmm.

Boo boom.

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells

♪ Jingle all the way

Let's make our
planet great again.

Awesome!

Wow!

Me speak?

Me speak!

I can speak your language!

Dear Earthlings!

We are happy to greet you

on behalf of our galaxy.

We are happy, too.

Let us sing a song for you!

No, Max, please.

I'm begging you.

Bob, don't worry!

You need help us!

Of course, just a sec!

♪ At first I was afraid

♪ I was petrified

♪ Kept thinking I
could never live ♪

♪ Without you by my side

♪ But then I spent

♪ So many nights thinking
how you did me wrong ♪

♪ And I grew strong

♪ And I learned
how to get along ♪

♪ And so you're back
from outer space ♪

♪ I just walked in
to find you here ♪

♪ With that sad look
upon your face ♪

♪ I should have changed

♪ That stupid lock, I should
have made you leave your key ♪

♪ If I'd have known
for just one second ♪

♪ You'd be back to bother me

♪ No, now go

Ouch!

Thank you.

It is very beautiful song.

But we need to
fix our spaceship.

Now you help us?

Well, let's see.

Too many wires.

Where are they, by the way?

I need a wrench.

No, an ax.

Large ax!

Too many extra parts here.

Everything's so small.

Surely not for beavers.

I wonder how it flies.

Loads of trash inside.

Oh.

Phew!

What?

I'm finished.

You made all of it up, Vic.

There're no aliens here, bro.

Let's go home!

Look how strong the signal is.

Right, huh?

Now we'll show them!

Hmm?

Hmm, hmm.

Ha!

Gotcha, surrender, dwarf!

You are my prisoner from now on.

You're going to pay
for all your mischiefs!

It's so boring.

I'm stuck here for
the whole summer.

Hmm?

Hmm.

Oh, I know, let's
play a hunting game!

Hey, hey, ha.

Hunter's
rule number one,

to become one with nature and
be invisible for your prey.

Hunter's rule number two,

to be attentive and cunning.

Huh, hey.

I can feel there's
an animal trail here.

Ah ah achoo!

The third rule,
always be patient.

You have to prepare a trap,

build a hideout, and wait.

Hmm.

Predators are on their way.

Hey!

Hunter's main rule,

never let your prey go!

Hey, hey!

Woo, woo hoo!

That's no good.

The source!

The energy source!

We need it.

That's why we
crashed so foolishly.

Do you have an idea where it is?

Mmm nnn.

We need it so much.

Our planet is going to die

- without it.
- Hot diggity dog.

- You have to help us!
- Awesome!

You have to!

What on Earth is it?

Let's see.

Oops.

I'm flying.

Flying again!

Huh?

Me too.

And where are we headed now?

I don't know.

The signal's gone.

Look!

There it is.

We're definitely nearby.

Move it!

Who are you?

I'm Baz.

I'm here on holidays,
staying at my grandparents'.

Sorry, I pushed the button.

But why?

Yeah, why?

I didn't mean it.

I thought...

Oh, ah wa wa wa!

Ah, you didn't think about it?

How are we gonna get down?

You need to reach the
gadget and press a button.

How do we reach it?

We need to push each other.

I'll catch it and
press a button.

All right, let's
give it a try.

Look, look!

That's a flying saucer!

And real aliens!

Now we gonna be world famous!

And we'll be rich, bro!

What do we do now?

I know!

Did you forget?

Hot air balloon!

Exactly!

Hot air balloon?

From where?

Turned out that after the cat

moved into the Beaver's house

another unusual thing happened.

Hot air balloon?

Ah!

I can't make a
pie with this guy.

Huh?

Hey wait.

You need to be
careful with that.

Everything needs to
be checked properly.

Come on!

You're simply jealous!

La la la la la la la la!

Huh!

Stop!

Wait, are
you out of your mind?

Somebody help me!

I'll save you!

Hold on!

Stay where you are.

Uh?

I just wanted to be famous.

Everybody wants to
become a celebrity

but not everyone admits to it.

My oh my.

Max, don't get upset.

We'll have it fixed.

Really?

Promise?

I swear by my tooth.

And that's that.

Yeah, like that.

Then let's go.

What we are waiting for?

We will lift your flying
saucer up and then drop it.

We'll boost your speed once
you've got up in the sky.

Yeah!

And you'll warp speed.

Boom boom.

Boom boom.

No way, we can't!

We need the source.

But we will do it!

Get in now.

All aboard!

We're doomed.

Sail off!

Huh?

Look!

Huh?

Blow me down!

I know them.

They are ufologists.

Alien hunters!

They kidnapped
our little aliens.

After them!

There they are!

Hold on tight!

We'll show you!

Bro, are we millionaires now?

Billionaires, bro!

Superstars and greatest heroes!

I told you I was right, hah!

You okay?

I don't know.

Huh?

What's that?

Hey, hey come back!

Ha ha, gotcha!

Freeze!

Hands up!

We give up, we give up!

Right, Nick?

Yeah, we give up!

What are we gonna do?

Are you asking me?

It's your fault
we're stuck here!

We were just
on the brink of success.

Ow!

Okay, fine.

Get ready, and...

Dear space guests!

I am happy to welcome
you to my beehive!

Ah ah achoo!

Help me!

It's useless, bro!

It's all your fault!

No, it's your fault!

Could you not notice the pit?

If it wasn't for me,
we would be losers.

And who are we now?

Did you even take a
picture of those aliens?

I was in a hurry!

'Cause you're an idiot.

Yeah, 'cause I'm an idiot.

What?

You're an idiot!

Do you see this?

Oh, who's the idiot here?

Yeah, it won't fit in our van.

I'm kind of scared, bro.

What if they came to
avenge their brothers?

Right!

We're doomed.

We're saved, bro!

Welcome to our planet Earth!

We represent our civilization,

the best civilization
in the universe.

Isn't it a bit too much, bro?

Yeah, well, uh, I mean,

I wanted to say that.

I wanted to, but I didn't.

We are the second best
after you guys, huh?

Uh huh.

Yeah, and we're very
happy to make contact.

Where're you going?

Vic!

Goodbye, bro!

Avenge me!

I can't, Vic.

I'm coming after you!

Finally, I'll become famous

and the whole
world will know me!

Help!

Somebody help, help me!

Help me!

They're Scratchers!

They collect animals
from all planets

and bring them to the Space Zoo

on the big entertainment planet.

They chase us.

I drive as good as I could.

But they still got us.

I landed ship on Earth

and now Scratchers come here!

We'll go get Max.

Finally an adventure!

It's our fault
that the Scratchers

came here and offended you.

We'll go with you!

What will happen to us, bro?

I don't know.

Maybe they will
experiment on us.

Huh?

Experiments?

Let us out!

We're not animals, we're
intelligent beings!

Well, I am, Nick.

Not sure about you.

My beehives!

My honey!

My bees!

All is lost.

What will they do without me?

Would you stop fussing?

I'm trying to think.

Do something.

Yeah, sure, like what, huh?

You're right.

Hang on.

Let's play a game!

What kind of game?

Rock-paper-scissors for fun.

Are you kidding me?

Don't you understand
what happened to us?

We're doomed!

Do you get it?

I do, I do.

I know it's the end.

All the better to play.

Before death.

Hey, I have a plan.

Mmm hmm?

One, two, three!

You loser!

Your forehead.

Make it louder.

One, two, three!

You lost again, Mr. Bear.

Hey, wait, wait,
wait, guys, guys!

It's just a game,
rock-paper-scissors!

The rules are simple.

Here, see my fist?

We form a rock.

Or paper.

Or scissors.

Got it?

Scissors cut the paper.

Rock crushes scissors.

Paper covers rock.

Do you wanna play?

One, two, three!

There, my rock
crushes your scissors.

I won!

Give me your gun!

Don't get upset.

It's not a big deal.

You'll get it all back.

I have an idea.

If I lose, I'll give
you your stuff back.

And if I win, you'll let us go.

Sound good?

What?

Huh?

Don't worry, I'll
come back for you!

Oops!

Where now?

Which way, which way?

Maybe go right?

No, left?

Oh no, just move, move, move!

They couldn't hang a sign
up or anything, could they?

Another ventilator.

Turn here.

Oh it's a true labyrinth!

Where am I?

Wow, a hatch.

So deep.

I should be c-c-careful.

Bob, hey, are you here?

Nobody's home.

Ah, there!

Where are they anyway?

Maybe they're
trying to rescue me.

Oh!

Oh I can't
believe my eyes!

They've been caught!

Oh, they're inside.

What should I do?

What should I do?

Save them!

Woo hoo!

Ow!

Surrender!

I'm here to free everybody.

Right!

The flying saucer.

So how does it work?

I'm flying!

What's going on?

Of course, the treasure!

Uh upside down.

Oh!

Hmm?

Hmm.

It's so good!

It's awesome!

Can I go up like this?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Oh, oh, oh wait.

The bridge, the bridge!

Come on, you stupid
piece of metal!

Just stop!

Please!

I'm flying upside down.

Again.

And again!

Not so quick!

Yes, here we go!

Woo, come on!

Come on, let's go!

That's it.

This is left, this is right.

Up and down.

What now?

Weapon!

Where is it?

Ah ha!

Ta da!

I broke my tail!

Got it.

Let's go!

Fine, fine, where are they?

Ah ha, there they are!

Feel my wrath!

Uh oh!

Got ya, got ya!

There!

Oh no, I missed.

What's that?

A force shield.

Phew.

I got away.

Oh!

We need to help him!

But how?

Yeah, how?

♪ At first I was afraid,
I was petrified ♪

♪ Kept thinking I could
never live without you ♪

♪ By my side

♪ But then I spent
so many nights ♪

♪ Thinking how
you did me wrong ♪

♪ And I grew strong

♪ And I learned
how to get along ♪

♪ And so you're back
from outer space ♪

♪ I just walked in

♪ To find you here with that
sad look upon your face ♪

♪ I should have changed
that stupid lock ♪

♪ I should have made
you leave your key ♪

♪ If I'd have known
for just one second ♪

♪ You'd be back to bother me

♪ Go, now go

♪ Walk out the door

♪ Just turn around now

♪ 'Cause you're not
welcome anymore ♪

♪ Weren't you the
one who tried ♪

♪ To break me with goodbye

♪ Did you think that
I would crumble ♪

♪ Did you think I'd
lay down and die ♪

♪ Oh no, not I

♪ I will survive

♪ Oh, as long as I
know how to love ♪

♪ I know I'll stay alive

♪ I've got all my life to live

♪ And I've got all
my love to give ♪

♪ I will survive

♪ I will survive, hey, hey

Ah ha, scared?

Fine, I'll ram ya!

You'll pay, pimpleheads.

You'll pay!

♪ Go on now, go,
walk out the door ♪

♪ Just turn around now

♪ 'Cause you're not
welcome anymore ♪

♪ Weren't you the
one who tried ♪

♪ To break me with goodbye

♪ Did you think I'd crumble

♪ Did you think I'd
lay down and die ♪

♪ Oh no, not I

♪ I will survive

♪ Oh, as long as I
know how to love ♪

♪ I know I'll stay alive

♪ And I've got all
my life to live ♪

♪ And I've got all
my love to give ♪

♪ And I'll survive

- ♪ I will survive
- The shield's off.

♪ Hey hey

Woo hoo!

Wait, hey, whoa!

Many years ago our
civilization visit your planet

and left the energy source.

We think you ancestors hide it

and you find it.

It sent a signal into space,

we fly by your
planet and catch it.

But Scratchers, boom
boom, attack us,

but you save.

Now we are friends
forever and ever.

Max, you're a hero.

Supercat!

Hero hero hero hero!

You'll be famous.

My bees will tell everybody

about you in our forest.

I'll spread the word
about you in India.

You'll be famous in Africa.

And
in Antarctica too.

We'll tell about you to
everyone on our planet.

You will be

the most famous
cat in our galaxy.

And in the whole universe.

Thank you, friends.

But, I just wanted
to save you all.

And to become a famous...

I have all the time for that.

There are more important things.

So, we need to go.

And where to?

Home?

Yes, but first we deliver
Scratchers to the Space Zoo.

Make sure you don't
miss a thing, bro!

I won't.

Look, look!

Bingo!

Well, who is in
the cage now, huh?

Say cheese!

What's that, bro?

I don't know, but I
guess we're taking off!

All right, I need to go home.

Bye!

I'll drop by tomorrow, okay?

Better not.

Do you think
they'll come back?

I don't know.

I wish they would.

They'll come back.

Of course, they will.

Who else will teach them sawing?

When it comes to sawing,

we're the best.

Well, that's it.

But new adventures
await us ahead.

Please
tell us what happened?

Well, I mean, we were
abducted by aliens!

Uh, they had
melon-shaped heads.

They wanted to
experiment on us.

Yeah, they did!

And do you expect
people to believe you?

Boom.

Boom boom.

Boom boom!

Subtitles by explosiveskull