Try Harder! (2021) - full transcript

At Lowell High School, the top public high school in San Francisco, the seniors are stressed out. As they prepare for the emotionally draining college application process, students are keenly aware of the intense competition for the few open spots in their dream colleges. At Lowell - where cool kids are nerds, nearly everyone has an amazing talent, and most of the student body is Asian American - the things that usually make a person stand out can feel commonplace. With humor and heart, director Debbie Lum captures the reality of the American college application process and the intersection of class, race, and educational opportunity as young adults navigate a quintessential rite of passage.

When you first come

in from middle school

you'll want to cry.

I will give you a test

every other Wednesday.

It's really stressful.

You aren't as smart

as you think you are.

Okay, that's like a B minus,

you can do a lot better.

Go to class.

I am going to class!

It's tangible in some of

those classes, you know,

you can feel how worried

people are about college.

It's a nationally

ranked school.

My mom pretty much forced

me to go to Lowell.

Lowell is tiger mom central.

That's motivation.

My friend, he said,

"Oh, you go to an Asian

excellency school."

The kids who come here

know they are competing

in a world that is very

high achieving.

I would love UC Berkeley.

Harvard, Stanford.

Columbia.

- Stanford.

- Stanford.

Stanford's my dream school.

Lowell is the ultimate

self-confidence crusher.

It's the best.

All right, so, this is Lowell.

It's very unlike all the other

high schools in like the area

in that, it's not in

that great of condition.

I've had friends from like

Menlo-Atherton come up here,

and they say that Lowell

kind of looks like a prison,

and I go over to their school

and I know exactly what

they're talking about.

Yeah, so,

should we go check it out now?

Yeah, so this is like

the flagpole.

This is like the front entrance,

this is where everyone goes in,

and yeah...

this is all our awards

and stuff.

This is what alumni get to

brag about.

So, we have the library.

After school, this place

gets packed, like packed,

like you can't find a seat.

This is the computer lab,

it's always really crowded...

but it's a great place to

gain access to computers.

Yo, Ian.

Christian.

So this hallway is

usually packed

and that intersection is one

of the worst.

I think a lot of kids at Lowell,

they're actually pretty amazing.

My mom wants me to go

to Stanford

but that's like, whoa,

kind of far out there.

Obviously Stanford

would be great,

but even if I had a 4.0 GPA and

I got a nearly perfect score

on the SAT, I would have a one

in five chance of getting in.

Bye, Sophia.

Bye.

Bye.

Okay.

Stanford is probably my top

choice, yeah.

What is funny and not funny

will depend on who are and...

Like a lot of freshmen

have a lot of Stanford gear

and I was one of them.

But by sophomore year...

you don't see any Stanford

gear on them anymore.

Maybe it's like Cal and UCLA.

By junior year you see

people with like...

Occidental, or like...

what's another

west coast private college

that's not that hard

to get into?

I got to dance.

- What's up?

- Hi.

My dream school would be

probably UCLA.

UCs, baby!

This is the AP physics C class

and only like the most

devoted to like learning

and like the best at math

and the best at physics

and the best at like learning

in general take this class.

I would say that most

kids that end up in an Ivy

would have taken this

class in high school.

I guess you're just

looking at like,

the cream of the crop

right here.

So yeah.

We're gonna start

hopefully in a few seconds.

Oh, I'm not taking it,

because I didn't take

an AP physics before

and I think that's like sort

of like the prerequisite,

and because like, I'm

just too scared to take

like a really hard math

related class.

Ladies and gentlemen,

let's get focused,

you're gonna need every second.

You can use calculators,

and your brains

and your hands and nothing else.

Please begin.

I've been teaching at Lowell

since 1990.

In the 90s,

if you went to Lowell,

and had a good solid B

average in honors courses

you got into Berkeley, you just

walked in, everyone got in.

Now you don't.

They're objectively under

more pressure

in terms of college acceptance.

The physics students

essentially are all seniors,

so this is their last grade

for college application.

One wrong answer could

potentially mean the difference

between an A and a B or B

and a C, right?

Which would be a difference

in your overall grade,

which would be a difference

in your GPA,

which would be a difference

in the college and

everything else.

We want to see whether or

not potentially exosomes,

the release of exosomes

could maintain homeostasis

in a cell.

So, in this overlay where

we inhibit lysosomes

and we got rid of exosomes,

there was a worsening of

homeostasis.

So yours is mostly

just as a compensation

to loss of lysosomes?

Yeah, loss of lysosomes.

Great. Good work.

I'm really impressed.

I'm impressed that anyone

let alone a high school

summer student could do this

much work in one summer.

We also did a western

blot of the same protein C63

which is extra enriched.

And then we found that

there was an increase

of C63 in.

And knowing that there's

increase of both...

So what do you think you're

gonna do in the future?

Probably become a surgeon.

- Become a surgeon?

- Yeah.

What kind of surgeon?

Like a brain surgeon.

Turn your shoulders a

little that way.

Turn your head, a little tilt,

big smile.

Perfect.

For Lowell students, I

feel like there's definitely

a pressure from your classmates.

Awesome.

Awesome.

Awesome.

Awesome.

Thank you very much.

And also a pressure at

home too.

It's like a war on two fronts.

You want to go to the college,

I want to get out of

the college,

I have to be better than you

to get into that college.

So, I'll work my tail off

to be better than you.

Sometimes at Lowell, it's

hard to have a strong sense

of self-esteem because you're

always comparing yourself

to other people like, oh,

this person has a higher

grade point average than me,

they got a better ACT

score than me

so, how am I gonna measure up?

You jump in the water, swim

an hour that way then swim,

that's two hours.

Going to Lowell,

I have been introduced

to so many like actual

like geniuses.

I mean, I feel like every

class has a superstar.

Jonathan Chu, for example.

Jonathan Chu.

Jonathan Chu,

he's our class president.

He is really, really smart.

Really smart

He's just a superhuman.

Well J-Chu is god.

He's just really smart,

really social

like probably like

the Renaissance man

at Lowell per se.

Jonathan is among the top

five violinists we've ever had

and that's really saying

something.

He's the perfect Lowell

student, he takes like,

I guess every AP and like

aces everything.

A 4.7 GPA.

He once got a zero on

his bio test on purpose

because that he can still

do that and get an A

to lower the curve.

Johnathan got 100,

I'm not surprised,

I'll have to make it harder

next time.

I think there was little doubt

that he was destined for

greatness.

I guess I came into

Lowell thinking

that I would go to Lowell,

breeze through it,

go to Stanford

like do really well at

Stanford, go to med school

and then become a doctor like

typical Asian path right?

But when I would get like

barely passing

there would always be

someone that gets like 120%

and that's when I sort

of realized, oh geez.

I'm really not even close

to the best of the best.

I see you're at 1, 2,

3, 4, 5, 6

7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15,

16, 17, 18, almost 20 schools.

So for now I'd say getting

it down to about 12...

- 12, all right...

- If you can.

So do like colleges like

expect like a longer resume,

shorter resume?

No, it's more about what

you're doing

and what your experience

has been.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

It's not like a competition

on length.

Like in terms of what colleges

look for, tough classes,

high standardized test scores,

awards and extracurriculars,

you name it.

There's pretty much some guy

that's doing it better

than I am.

Personal statements,

the resume,

your letters of recommendation,

GPA and test scores.

The odds are against

me, and I know that.

I know that I have to like

up the ante,

like for like the supplementals

like are colleges looking

for anything in particular.

I would have to get like a

really high score compared

to the school's average in

order to get

a lot of merit aide right?

Like do universities

give you any extra points

for early decision?

It definitely is gonna

be a more select group.

Is it worth it to take the

PSAT again?

PSAT?

Yeah, trying to be

national merit scholar?

Oh, I've never heard of

someone taking it again.

Yeah, senior year.

Well, if I could, I would

probably just to take the SAT

every single week.

Same.

Oh yeah,

and about being an Eagle scout,

Smile.

Are they're like a lot of

scholarships for Eagle scouts?

Well, I think that's something

you'd have to look into.

Yeah.

All right, what else?

I think that's it for today.

Okay, guys and gals.

Today, we face the truth.

I will put the bowling ball,

I will touch your nose

and I will let it go.

And if you don't flinch,

it means you know that this is

the maximum potential energy,

1000 joules.

It cannot go to 1,001.

Okay.

Close.

Okay, Alvan.

Oh, my gosh.

Okay, here we go.

Oh...

Lowell student, he didn't

flinch, but what did he do?

Oh.

When I was in middle school

I thought that everybody

who came to Lowell

would be like a genius

in some sort of way.

And like,

this was the cream of the crop.

But now that I'm here,

it's just not really that.

Come on up Shea, all right,

here we go.

Oh my gosh.

Whoa!

Amazingly close.

Sophia, come on up.

All right.

Walk your nose into it, stand...

I don't really know why

it's not as difficult for me

to be here than it is for

other people to be here.

Oh, I saw her hair flinch,

but I didn't see her flinch.

Did anybody see her flinch?

No.

How did you do that?

Maybe it's just that

I'm the kind of person

who can handle a lot of

things at once.

I'm the captain of the

tennis team.

I'm also co-president of

Lowell Build On.

Vice president of

Girls Who Code.

I'm the editor of the

school newspaper too.

I think I'm the kind of

person who enjoys being busy.

That's for you guys, right?

My parents are from

mainland China.

College is just a huge goal for

a lot of immigrant families.

Everything you do should

be to help you

get to the best college you

can get to.

What are your plans today?

I need to do homework,

probably on my free block.

Got it.

But I have to do journalism

on my free block too.

Here's the deal.

So much going on...

What I need you to do?

I know, and that's why I

want you to write it all down.

And then also copy me on

your calendar,

so I can help you remember,

you have to put the

alerts on your calendar.

As I...

I was in chemistry class as

a sophomore

and I had gotten a bad grade

in class and I said out loud,

oh man, my mom is gonna be

really upset.

The girl across the table

she asked me, "Wait, Rachel,

what ethnicity are you?"

And I said, I'm black and white.

And she said, "Well, what

ethnicity is your mom?"

And I was like,

she's African-American.

And she said, "That's so

weird because I didn't expect"

for black people to actually

care about their grades."

All right,

other than a B in physics,

you have all the As, and I...

Sorry.

No, I'm okay.

I'm cool with that.

It's AP Physics in there anyhow.

I'm okay with it.

Oh, we have the best

relationship ever.

We're really good friends.

She's a single mother and I

live with her.

We're just the two of us.

Now, I'm a true believer

in the Lord only helping

those that help themselves.

So if you don't put in

his spit on your ball.

Yeah.

It's gonna be bad.

Okay.

I got to get to work.

Bye.

Go have a great day.

You too.

All right.

I think one of my scores

came back on the PSAT

and I scored in like the top

1% of the nation or something.

And I was like, what?

That's not me.

I don't think I'm that smart.

But my mom's like,"I knew

it, I knew it all along."

And now that's like the

league of people

that can get into Harvard

and Stanford.

So you should try.

All right, so,

the theme of our

presentation this afternoon

is where should you apply?

There is a lot of herd

mentality.

There's a lot, you know,

people just applying to the

same schools, and okay, yes.

You know, we all know what

the Ivy League schools are,

and there is a certain

attraction to applying to them

but I'm not even referring

to them.

Let's talk about the defaults.

Namely, the UC System.

We all have a perceptual

pecking order of the UCs.

But the thing to remember

is you are not too good

for Santa Cruz or Riverside

or even Merced, okay?

UC is UC.

I've become a voice to tell

kids look away from Stanford.

You're not getting in.

Let's try this.

You know, you look at you

know, the Ivy League schools

and even if you are a student

who should be accepted

at a school like this, you

may not get in any way.

And that in many cases has to do

with a little thing called

ethnicity.

Um, anyway, so...

God damn!

Yes.

Are you sure?

I'm so screwed dude.

Look at my test... oh, my God.

Are you sure?

I haven't had a chance

to go over it with you.

I did root instead

of squares, and then I...

So stupid...

I'll have to go through that...

Stupid, okay all right.

Shea, Shea.

You got a 92.

Teach me your ways, please.

Take the textbook,

do all the problems in the

textbook and check your work.

And then stay up till

three in the morning,

trying to finish my other

homework.

Oh yeah.

If we looked at the

blue particles as being

in pure rotation, could

be different masses,

or it doesn't matter.

Each is a different distance

R from the axis of rotation,

and we added up all of...

I was really depressed in

middle school...

I'm not a suburb kid, I'm

not meant to be in a house

with a white picket fence

with a bunch of, you know,

rich, spoiled trust fund

white kids.

There's just something

about the personality

of a person who doesn't

care and will still succeed.

It just,

it rubs me the wrong way.

So, I mean, going to a school

with a bunch of like

Asian kids is just like

going to a school with a

bunch of people who care.

It's like a school of other

Asian me's.

The career path that I

want to pursue,

I think that climate

change is like

just entire social dynamic

that is the world right now

is going to change in

my lifetime.

So I want to be in a position

where I feel like I'm helping.

So I'm trying to pursue

alternative energies,

and I also need to go like

one of the top 20 colleges

'cause otherwise I'm not gonna

be doing anything significant.

I'm going to the Stanford

college presentation.

I'm actually applying early

for Stanford.

What I've heard about Lowell

students getting into Stanford

is that there's a smaller

chance?

Like what's special

about Stanford's

like pre-med pathway?

Okay, so,

we don't have a pre-med major?

Oh yeah, I've heard that

Stanford doesn't like Lowell.

They don't accept a lot

of people from Lowell.

I guess it's because

they just think

that we're like

stereotypically Asian.

Apparently we're like

robots here.

'Cause they think we're

AP machines.

AP machines.

AP guzzling, grade grubbers.

Maybe he doesn't have like

personalities that we want.

But you did not even

have to major

in the biological sciences

or chemistry

or anything like that, you could

major in English and still...

I was at the presentations,

according to my memory

the Stanford admission

officer addressed the faculty

and implied that Stanford

viewed of Lowell students

as just a bunch of machines

that accumulated massive amounts

of course material and was

able to spit it back on exams

and they wanted a

different kind of student.

Last year someone

asked why is it

that such an oddly small

percentage

of Lowell kids get into

Stanford?

And then someone else

raises their hand

and said,

"Is it 'cause we're all Asian?"

To which the Stanford guy

said, "Raise your hand"

if you would like everyone at

your school to be the same."

There was silence.

No one raises their hands.

And, I don't know if,

you know, how that plays

into racial profiling in

terms of smart Asian kids

that do really, really well

and then are put down for it.

Good morning,

Lowell high school.

It's a beautiful day up here

in the fourth floor

swimming pool.

And we got some great

announcements for you today

but first please rise for

the pledge of allegiance.

So like right now the

senior class

is stressing over a

college apps.

Right now is the time to get

all the recs,

like write all the essays

and like finalize your list.

There's so many qualified

applicants nowadays.

That's why you got

to diversify,

and apply like 20 schools

just to like throw

your ballot around on,

see who picks it up.

Every kid needs to be able

to understand

and explain the same

things about themselves

when they hit the college

process.

Who are you?

What interests you?

What have you thought

about doing?

It's not all about GPA's and

SAT scores.

There's no formula for

success anymore.

And what matters is that

each child visualizes

and actualizes their own life.

How was it taking the

step further?

By bringing it out of

the open.

We need to learn about cultural

sensitivity, its obvious...

Journalism originally,

my mom actually signed

me up for the class.

I found I actually do like

writing stories

and reporting and talking

to people.

The ability to just come up

with ideas,

for stories and then

present them

and actually get them

published is really cool to me.

No, all right, this is too much.

The editors and I wanted to

do something

that would show the struggle

between choosing what side

of my racial identity that

I actually identify with.

This lighter skinned hand

is supposed to represent

my Caucasian side, and

this darker skin hand

is supposed to represent

my African-American side.

My mom, she goes by the rule

that if you're even one

16th African-American

you are a 100%, and then like,

that's what I should put on

my transcript.

It goes totally against

that story

I wrote about how I am

African-American and Caucasian.

So I do feel uncomfortable

putting it down

but if it's something that

can help me

then I feel like I should

take that and use it

to my advantage,

which is horrible

now that I say it out loud.

Well, good afternoon Lowell.

Good afternoon!

Oh, hey, that's great.

So my name is Quinton McArthur.

I'm a admissions officer at MIT,

the Massachusetts Institute of

Technology.

So it's always a good

idea to be nice to me

and laugh at my jokes,

that's right.

Somebody's getting in

from Lowell.

MIT is not one of my

top choices.

Yeah, I don't think it

really fits me.

But we saw your mom

there and dad.

Did you know they're

going to go?

They don't tell me

these things.

Like they go, they only

tell me after they go.

We do have multiple

choices, that's all right too.

My parents are

first-generation immigrants.

And my mom's kind of

like the steering wheel.

For me I can say, Oh,

grades don't matter, right?

Don't like define you as

a person.

But my mom studied really

hard in Taiwan.

So, she thinks that grades

are actually pretty important.

And she has to like push me.

She's actually told me,

it's like I have like a

little box around me, right?

As I grow older, the

box will expand, right?

Until finally there's like

no more box anymore, right?

And I'll be able to do my

own things,

I'll be able to be responsible.

But for now,

I'm still in a little box

and she has to like,

look over me.

Mom, wait.

Okay, now I'm getting all

stressed out.

ACT Tests,

SAT before March, 2016.

Can you check them off

and I'll work

on the activities at edits now?

How many of we taken?

I put in that score,

I finished SAT.

This is for the normal SAT.

Are you sure we have enough

time to finish by tonight?

When she says, "What if you

could get into Stanford?"

She's saying I'm not

expecting you to, but what if.

But I still can't help,

but feel like I want to

meet her expectations.

'Cause you know, I just

wanna make her proud.

Isn't it okay?

Well, how we have it is

okay, right?

I wanna do something for

her to make her happy

but the pressure is kind

of insurmountable at times.

It makes me feel not the best.

Next semester like...

It was really intense.

My mom wanted me to

finish on Saturday night

because she knew that I had

to do homework on Sunday.

By like 12 o'clock.

I was already like, you

know what, screw it.

I wanna go to sleep.

But no, like we kept working

until like three o'clock.

It was crazy, yeah.

I do feel a little bit of

relief knowing

that I successfully like

finished it.

But you know,

I still prefer a UC.

I feel like there's a much

higher chance

of the UC accepting me for

like my grades

and that kind of stuff.

He has very high goals

but I think for him,

it's very realistic goals.

One of those schools would

be Stanford.

The top tier UCs:

UC Berkeley, UCLA.

I told him to apply to Brown.

I think it would be a

really great school for him.

The kids at Brown are unique.

All right everyone.

So we're going to go

ahead and get started.

How can women be pregnant

and not show any symptoms?

What age does your penis

stop growing?

Do women ejaculate every

time they climax like men do?

Like 25%.

You're very close.

Okay, it's about 10.

Wait, wait.

That's like a 10% difference.

That's like a difference

between A and B.

That's what I was gonna say.

How do I know if I'm

ready for sex?

What do you think?

You need to feel ready?

Yeah, you yourself like feel

confident that you want it...

You feel confident?

- Yes.

- Okay.

After your parents say, okay.

So I hear that there

is a dance this Friday,

are you gonna go to it?

Wait, there's a dance?

♪ Stop with the chase, baby

boy you catching case ♪

♪ Dropping everyday

like am in a real race ♪

♪ Cops better wait, got

that game on my lane ♪

It's kind of interesting to

see everyone

that I'm so used to gonna

school with, like in costume.

And having fun.

I don't know. It's nice.

That's a nasty woman

right there.

I love Asians, Asians love me.

Its been fantastic,

they're fantastic.

♪ Hands up, and suddenly

we all got our hands up ♪

♪ No control of my body

♪ Ain't I seen you before?

♪ I think I remember those

eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes ♪

♪ Eyes, eyes, eyes

♪ 'Cause baby tonight,

♪ DJ got us fallin' in

love again ♪

I wanted to get like

people to start dancing,

'cause usually like there's like

an activation energy, right?

For all your chemical reaction.

Like I was basically like

an enzyme, like the catalyze

like the reactions to

speed it up.

And then, you know.

♪ Ooh, jumpman, jumpman,

jumpman, ♪

♪ They gave me my own

collection, ooh. ♪

I am Brian Emmanuel.

He's like a Chinese rapper.

He's got like shorts, right?

Usually his shorts are supposed

to like go like up to here.

But mine are just a

little bit down

'cause my mom didn't want

me to like trip

and like, I don't...

My mom just wants me

to protect my knees from

the cold or something.

So that's why it's over

my knees.

♪ It's going down for real

If my family didn't

really push me that much,

I would be a different person.

Without pressure then

we're just like,

"Oh, we'll just sit at home"

and like play video games

or watch TV

"or like hang out with

friends, right?"

I do like pressure, but I

don't like too much pressure.

He's just doing all of it.

So I'm like the opposite of

a tiger mom.

I actually wanted my son to

go to a neighborhood school.

Just so that he would have

a more balanced in his life.

I remember having to work very

hard when I was at Lowell.

I didn't want him to

have to work that hard,

but I mean I feel like I was

a bad parent

after Ian told me that he

didn't have enough APs

to be considered for, you

know, certain colleges.

I felt really bad.

We were panicking a little bit,

I guess.

And a friend had recommended

a college advising counselor

and we engaged her, I

guess in late October.

So we were actually really late

starting with that process.

I think the biggest

role that she's played

is that she helped me

turn around

and see doors that were open.

Part of the reason

why we didn't want him

to take so many AP classes was

'cause we wanted him to learn

a little bit more about

what he wanted to do.

So, he started writing his

satirical blog.

I mean, that's kind of

a crazy thing, right?

I mean, I guess maybe I

don't have a sense of humor.

I was like really?

But, you know, whatever makes

him happy and inspires him.

And so, I would say to parents

to really have your kids

do things that help

them to think creatively

that they're not just

a statistic.

They're not a test score.

The satire piece is

like supposed to mimic

So I wanna talk about three

things today

then you take a little break

and then jumped back

into your lab.

And the third thing I have

to tell you,

you may or may not have

heard is very sad for me

because I need to let you know,

that I have liver cancer and

that five tumors have appeared

and I just found out about it,

and I'm going to need

to have that dealt with.

And I am active on the

liver transplant list.

The only way to get rid of

liver cancer

is to get rid of the liver.

I am very,

very sad and disappointed

to leave you guys midstream.

I really want to let you

know that I feel

I'm the luckiest person

in the world

having taught at Lowell.

I got, I think the most

wonderful students.

I got what I think was really

got love and appreciation

on a regular, if not daily

basis, I actually feel loved.

And I really wanna thank

you for that.

Okay guys,

it looked like you were having

a good time

doing the lab yesterday.

Sorry to bum you out,

but see if you can get

back into that today.

Okay, let's go.

Knowing Mr. Shapiro

at such a personal level

it's like you know,

I don't know,

I'll have difficulties doing

like doing all my other stuff.

Like probably these few months,

you know.

Homework, test, grades,

like they don't really

matter anymore

if like you don't have like

a firm emotional connection.

I just got evicted from

my house.

My dad did some shit, which the

landlord did not appreciate.

So we got kicked out.

Drugs, just drugs you know,

nothing good.

It was...

My mom lives in Sausalito

and it wouldn't be legal

for me to go to this school

if I didn't live in

San Francisco.

So, I need to be here to

attend here.

But it's totally worth it.

Like this school compared

to like anything else

is totally worth dealing

with him.

Today, it's the first day

of finals, the dreaded finals.

All right,

does anybody not have

a test sketch out in front of

them Hannah?

As always read questions

carefully.

Tell a story 'cause

it's about storytelling.

Today is the deadline

for UC apps and CSU apps.

So lots of apprehension,

anxiety.

The essays are probably one

of the most important things

next to grades and transcripts.

It's like how well you're

able to articulate yourself,

how well you're able to package

yourself for the university.

So I have roughly seven

supplemental essays,

the common app essay,

the UC essay.

I'm probably gonna have

to in the end

like write about 20 essays.

It's just really hard

to talk about yourself.

I don't know whether or

not I should

like be humble or like say

good things

or say one good thing and

a bad thing.

If you ask a lot of Asians,

a lot of them have a really

like a more humble outlook.

Like they don't wanna show

too much about themselves.

That's just how a lot of

Chinese people

or other Asian people,

are like brought up.

You have to sell

yourself 100%.

So even if you're not

convinced that you're the best,

you have to convince other

people you're the best.

My mom, she really thinks

that I have a big chance

of getting into Stanford.

She's like,

"Well, we're gonna get our

acceptance on December 15th."

When I'm like, no,

we're going to get mail

from Stanford on December 15.

All right, pencil down.

I don't have a 4.0 GPA,

I have a 3.9 cumulative.

And, I didn't get a 1600 on

the SAT, I only got a 1500,

and that's significantly lower

than the average of what

gets accepted

in the high level schools

like that.

The kids who are going to

higher level colleges are...

They're the big players

of the world, you know?

If I don't go to one

of those big colleges,

I will not be able to do what

I wanna do.

And at least looking at

my resume,

I don't have what it takes.

Okay, quick check on myself

to make sure

I have 35 copies before

I start passing it out.

Don't worry.

Jonathan you got into Harvard?

Jonathan Chu I'm not surprised.

The God.

He got into Harvard.

Oh, he did?

Yeah, early action.

It's pretty sick.

Are you guys surprised

that he got in?

No!

You guys are talking too much

for being in the possession

of it exam, okay?

It's a hard college to get

into, so I wasn't really upset.

It's not like I was like

hoping and wishing and thinking

that I was for certain

going to get in.

My mom's seemed, she tried

to pretend like she was okay

but I could tell she was

kind of disappointed.

I'm, okay.

I didn't really expect much

that kind of just like told me,

I guess that I'd be going to

the East coast for college,

which was my like original plan.

What was your mom's reaction

when she found out that you

got rejected?

Oh, she's the one who told me,

like I didn't even look at

my email.

She was the one who told me.

Wait, she checked it for you?

Yeah.

We didn't exchange gifts..

Because they buy the

things all the time so.

So you don't get a

present from your mom?

Yeah, I haven't really

been doing

anything besides like apps.

I think that my number

of colleges

that I've applied to is

like enough.

And then my mom's like,

"Okay once you finish this,

then you're done, right?

You don't have to do

anything else."

Then right after I finished it,

she wants me to do like

five more.

And it's like that's the same

for every single it's like,

I don't even,

I'm just so done with this.

Even though he's a teenager

he listened to parents'

advice pretty well.

And sometimes a few times

maybe he was kind of disagree

but he still will try to

accommodate parents advice.

She looks through stuff

and she gives me ideas.

My dad is like the physical

help, he'll like drive.

Yeah, and sometimes we

try to translate

the question to my husband,

even though he didn't get

a high school diploma,

but he's smart.

Yeah, he says,

"Just don't say that."

You should put that on

your college application.

No, no.

You know that?

'Cause that would actually

help your chances.

No, 'cause I don't want,

you know, people to like think

lowly of my dad or anything.

So, yeah.

Okay, because of that.

Yeah.

Think low.

All right, welcome back.

I am Mr. Cooley,

if you haven't seen me,

Mr. Shapiro has given me

control over your fates.

I have finished my college

applications

and I have sent everything in.

I am finishing my 20th school.

My Saturday is almost gone.

I have applied to 11,

that's including Stanford.

I have the two UCs so that's

Berkeley and LA and then Yale,

Princeton, Harvard, Brown,

Duke, Colombia, Penn

and Washington University,

was that 11?

Yeah, I think that's 11.

My worst fear would have a

student apply

to 10 very prestigious schools

and not get into any of them

and not have a backup plan.

How's anybody break?

Anything interesting?

Physics moments?

There must've been some

physics moments.

Stanford was a huge

disappointment, I got that.

But, now we know that's not the

direction we're going on in,

and we're gonna go on a

totally entirely

different direction.

Because if you went to Stanford,

you right down the

street from me.

Yeah, exactly.

You'll be in my face

every weekend.

Well then.

I'm not, you know I love you.

I mean, even Berkeley is

not gonna work for me.

That's a Bart ride away.

Why do you want me to

be far away?

I feel like you're kicking

me out.

Because I think you...

Here's the deal,

I think that you grow up

more when you're away,

I would like for you

to take your own space,

and make your own way.

Now the waiting begins.

Now we don't get to

wait, we have to wait.

Give me a hug.

It's really good to see you, oh.

Are you doing okay?

I'm doing okay, you know,

just there's a lot of you

know emotional difficulties,

waiting... it's you know, it's

the last nine days I think.

I was backed up on two livers.

So I would need one pretty soon.

Yeah.

That's the scary and

it really could happen.

So, be positive,

send positive prayers

and vibes my way,

you'll do that?

Yeah.

So, any fun happening

at school?

It's nerve wracking.

Did you apply to all these?

Oh my God.

Boston, Brown, Columbia,

Cornell, Emory, Fordham,

Harvard, Johns Hopkins,

Northeastern, Stanford Tulane.

My parents really

like Berkeley

but the location is so

close to home.

It's like, my parents

can like, come visit me

like every,

like two days or something.

Like I don't... you know.

They're gonna like tell me

to go home on the weekends

or something like,

I don't want that.

I told her, like, I

wanna go a bit further.

I feel like, I really like LA.

So, I would put that like first.

I'm a show them that you know,

I don't need East Coast,

first ranked schools.

Is that Sophia Wu?

I hate answering the like

why do you wanna go to

the school?

Yeah.

I don't know.

Especially when you like

haven't like gone to the school?

Did you get like a question

like that, just outright?

So, for all my other

interviews?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I also got that from my

MIT interview,

they're like, "oh yeah,

why do you want to go?"

I'm like...

Yeah, those are the

worst questions.

Oh my God, the Lowell crew

is here, eight o'clock.

Plot twist, they

interview us all together.

My mom, she keeps Boston

weather on her phone

to check in and see the

weather in Boston.

And she's like, "Oh,

it's snowing."

If you were in Harvard, you'd

have to wear a big coat."

She tries to give me

little practice interviews,

but I think it makes me

more nervous

because once I say like

an answer

that I think would be okay

she'd be like,

"Oh no, no, don't say

that that's wrong, no."

And then I'm like, "Oh."

Rachael!

I wanted to apply for

all the Ivy's.

That's kind of a awesome

thing to have as much

to me like a union ticket.

Once you graduate from

an Ivy league school

you basically can work where

you want to.

So, I would like to have for her

to have that level of security.

It's very important that

she's not relying upon

anybody's salary but her own.

We didn't apply for anything

that was a bad idea.

I mean, I think if you

play it too safe

then you don't take any chances,

you don't want rejection.

I think dealing with rejection

is a part of growing up.

I see my dad once

every three or four days.

He's unemployed and he doesn't

take any responsibility

for the most part in his life.

It's my grandma on my dad's

side that gives me money

for food and has taken up the

responsibility of raising me.

I go shopping for myself,

I clean the house,

I do all of that.

Then he's out from 9:00

PM to 6:00 AM every night.

Yeah, that's what he does.

There is something about

eating your own food

that makes it better though.

Just there's something to it.

Like you can burn everything

and you can still savor it

a bit more if you made it.

We initially thought that

the interview

would last about an hour or

so, but it went way over time.

So it went from 10 to

almost about 12.

He said that you know I'm

a pretty good fit for Brown

and you know he'll try to

put in a good word for me,

in his evaluation and stuff.

I just had to tell my mom that

there is different aspects

of the culture that she's not

necessarily familiar with.

Yeah it was really cringy.

And while my mom was talking

with the interviewer.

I was just like, Oh my God,

like this is gonna end so badly.

All right, here we go.

Shh, this is the scenario

you're gonna try

to reframe for yourself.

Pretend you got a

rejection letter

to all the colleges you

wanna go to.

Oh, you gotta go there?

I know this is like

preemptive,

as in you haven't gotten

rejected yet,

but how would you normally

interpret the situation?

What does it signal to you?

Oh, the rejection letter

equals what?

Everybody hates you.

What about potentials of

your future?

You have none.

You have none.

Yeah, signs of failure,

signs of no future.

What are you gonna do?

There's no hope for you,

et cetera, right?

And the prospects of

having no future.

Who needs a Bible here?

One, two...

God, we pray for just all of us.

We pray for the seniors

during this college

app season, Lord. The

letters are coming in.

We asked that no matter

what we will know that this

is all according to your plan.

Do you know like the

username and password

for the UC Davis application?

Okay.

Oh, hey,

guess who got accepted?

Uuui!

Hey, hey, hey. We, we...

I got in... wee!

Okay. I'll be out soon,

okay, bye.

It's too early to get excited.

But it's an acceptance.

I know, but I've been in

touch with Dartmouth today.

It was actually with in touch

with the financial aid lady.

She said she just needed

some more information.

Wait, what?

Yeah.

Wait, wait, wait, wait,

wait, wait.

What'd you just say?

Well, I'm just saying it may

have let the cat off the bag...

Can you like say word

for word what she said?

She said, "It's no

big deal, no big deal."

We just,

we're down to our final list.

We're just trying to get

all this stuff together

for these kids.

And then I think she kinda

let the cat out of the bag

with a comment of that nature.

So I'm feeling really hopeful.

I'm gonna see whether or

not I got in Johns Hopkins.

Here goes nothing.

God dammit,

give me some wifi bro.

Holy sm...

Ey, I didn't get in.

Woo!

It's lit.

My weekend was quite...

terrible.

I logged in and then

found out,

yeah I got rejected.

Which is...

- I got rejected.

- Where is that?

Davis.

All right.

Another one.

I didn't get in.

Oh, really?

No, I didn't get in.

Well, if I didn't get

into Davis,

then obviously Berkeley

and LA are probably

gonna reject me too now

because those ones are supposed

to be more difficult than Davis

to get into.

Oh, shit.

It's out.

I could log in.

Aight, this is gonna determine

my future.

I swear to God dude, if I...

come on, man,

come on, come on, dude.

Fuck.

No?

No.

Yeah.

What was their excuse?

It's always the same.

It's like you were one

out of what?

102,000 applicants.

And that they were all

overachieving, high...

high achieving but we

couldn't accept them all.

So it's like,

that's always their excuse.

They don't... There's an

option to be wait-listed.

Yeah, I'm gonna tell my mom now.

I'm gonna call her.

Sorry, man.

Mint chocolate chip, right?

I have pretty high expectations

for the type of people

who will be at the college

that I go to.

A lot of professors at

the schools

that are applying to they're

really, I don't know,

I guess you would call them

prestigious.

Like interesting people

who have stories to tell.

Thank you, have a good day.

You too.

All right.

Obviously after you applied

to college,

you'll be in a community

where all of these people

have gone through the same

application process as you,

and they've kind of been

weeded out.

It hasn't been often that

I've been in a situation

where there's less Asian people

than there are like other

ethnicities.

And I'm just really

looking forward to that.

I'm kind of tired of

Chinese people.

Okay, I got wait-listed.

From where?

Harvard.

Okay, I got waitlisted.

Yeah, from Columbia.

Okay, I think I'm gonna

check Brown right now.

Oh my gosh, another wait list.

I'm checking Penn right now.

Oh, okay, I got rejected.

Yeah, that's okay.

Okay, so I got rejected

from Yale.

Okay, so I got rejected

from Princeton, okay.

Okay, that's it.

Yeah, I'm relieved now.

Here you go.

I think I was expecting

to get into at least one.

I did really, really want to

go over to the East coast,

but I guess that's okay.

We'll do another time.

Alright,

let's kick this rally off.

How you guys doing today?

What was that?

How you guys doing today?

So many kids got into

Berkeley,

and I'm like, why didn't

I get into Berkeley?

You get used to feeling

mediocre.

It's just slowly but surely.

I was just personally

hoping for more.

It's kind of a hard time

right now.

What the hell?

Like this is not how high

school was supposed to end.

Three and a half years

of killing myself here

and I got in Santa Cruz.

I just feel like I tried so

hard and I'm going to a school

that I didn't even have to try

that hard to like get into.

Are you guys ready?

Alright you guys need to

be more hyped than this.

Are you guys ready?

I just think that I'm

not good enough you know.

That's what I think.

That's the one issue with

the college application process

'cause you can't figure

out what went wrong

and what went right?

I mean you're just so

powerless in the situation.

You know that there are

so many people out there

who are like similar to you

and like, how did they accept?

Like oh they just flip a coin

and they like throw darts

at a board.

This whole process creates

people who are very cynical

about the colleges they

ended up going to.

Go!

I can't go if it's full

price because I can't it,

my family cannot afford it.

But I hope if I do get in,

some aid that makes it

affordable.

Oh, my gosh.

Hey mom, so, I got into Oxford.

Full tuition for four years.

Wow, I guess that's pretty

surprising.

Full tuition.

All right, yeah.

All right, bye.

I guess I still don't even

know why I got into Emory.

There's definitely a part of

me that says

that I probably shouldn't have.

But I guess that's just

like the culture of Lowell

seeping into my brain.

The reason is that there really

is no reason,

and that college admissions

is like the only sure thing

is that there's no sure things.

Well, besides Jonathan Chu

gained Harvard and Stanford,

like, I'm pretty sure everyone

saw that since freshman year

like, come on now.

I know one kid thought

that I only got into UCLA

because I was black.

He said that, like,

just flat out.

"You probably just got

it 'cause you're black."

She gets a lot of pushback

at school.

People convincing her that

she got in because she's black

and with a 33 ACT score

and a 4.1 GPA,

it put her right in the medium

for every Ivy League school

that she applied for.

Ladies and gentlemen,

boys and girls,

please welcome our 4.0 students!

♪ Lift every voice and sing

♪ Ring with the harmonies

of Liberty ♪

I never imagined I

would have gotten here.

Four out of the eight Ivys

waitlisted me.

Two of them I got into,

I got into Brown University

and Cornell University.

My name is Rachel and I

go to Lowell High school.

Throughout my time at Lowell,

I've really internalized that

stereotype

that I get a lot of

things because I'm black.

And I think for a while,

I tried to like,

not own up to my blackness,

you know?

I think I've worked hard and I

think I have the right grades

and I've done the right

things to get to where I am.

But I don't like the

fact that Asian students

who deserve to get in

too just as much as I do,

they're not getting in

just because of their race.

I think colleges want somebody

who really knows what they

want to do.

And a lot of people at

Lowell don't really know

what their passion is yet.

Including me.

I don't think this far ahead.

I tried to portray myself

as less Asian

because Asians are seen as

like machines.

But like I work hard

and I strive to be a nerd.

How's that the definition of

being Asian?

I never took, I didn't

take dance like before

but I feel like I should

have 'cause I feel like

I'm missing out on a

lot of stuff.

Awww.

It's pretty cool.

What time the prom start?

It starts at eight.

Wow, that's pretty late.

Yeah, and it goes

until midnight,

You gonna do a limo?

My mom got like a room at

the hotel where the prom is at.

OMG.

Yeah, afterwards I can

just go up to my room

and go to sleep.

Any friends gonna

stay with you?

In the room?

Yeah, aren't you gonna

party with your friends?

So yeah.

So my mommy gonna stay?

Yeah.

Okay, just say me and mommy.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yes, what's up.

Okay, how's it going?

Well, yesterday morning,

my mom woke me up and

she was like,

"Well, you need to

choose your college today.

We're not leaving the

house until you do it."

Initially,

I wanted to go to Brown.

Just a lot of people strong in

literature came out of Brown

and I like creative writing

but she kept pushing

for Cornell.

And I thought to please her,

I would go to Cornell

and she'd be happier.

I'm not happy because

I wasn't successful, hmm.

Hmm, you got one more.

Alrighty.

I want to... It's like

balancing between what I want

and what I think my mom

will be most happy with.

And I feel like that's

the problem

for a lot of people at Lowell.

Alvan, awesome.

Oh, gosh thank you.

Yeah.

Right next to my heart.

Oh, right next to my new liver.

And then right next to my heart.

Thank you.

That's awesome.

I got off the Berkeley

wait list.

So, so you got into Berkeley?

Yeah.

Oh, that could cause a

little bit of contemplation

shall we say?

You right.

It's so nice to see you

and thank you.

Short question from me,

as the mother, of course,

like a San Diego offering

like a neuroscience,

which is his major that

he really like to do

in the future, but San

Diego only have like a 55%

four year graduation rate.

The question is not

which school is better

which school is better

for Alvin.

The best place for him

is where he feels the most

comfortable.

And since I know there's

many research opportunities

at San Diego, he'll be

better off then going to...

Harvard, Stanford, Berkeley,

any place.

Thank you, thank you.

So we are leaving,

'cause I think we spend you

too much time

and you have to take rest.

Okay, that's great, I

got energized by Alvan

that's what he does and

thank you very much.

Thank you so much.

Thank you, good luck,

good luck.

Good luck Mr. Shapiro.

God bless you, thank you.

I'm 18.

This is my college experience,

shouldn't I be making the

decision right?

But my mom just doesn't

think so.

And she wants to keep me

in like a little,

in like a little box or

something.

Bye Mr. Shapiro.

Goodbye Alvan.

Good bye.

Bye Mr. Shapiro.

A lot of people have told me,

high school is like gonna

be like the best time

of your life.

My best times in this

school were getting

like decent test scores,

getting decent GPA's,

finishing assignments on time.

Honestly, like there hasn't

been anything that has been like

whoa, I'm gonna remember

that when am like 80,

and have Alzheimer's or

something.

A lot of kids here, they

feel like their self worth

is really measured in which

university they go to.

And once they can't get

in, they get all sad.

They can't define themselves

in the way that they want to.

And it's crushing to see.

Ah, shoot.

I have a year and a half

more before I go into college.

The more I've looked around,

you know,

I think I don't need to

be in a top 20 school

to make a difference.

I think I can make whatever

school I'm at my own.

And I think that's what's

important.

And you know, I think

that might come off as me

like settling for less or

something

or like changing my perspective

to avoid like the hurt

but I really do think that my

perspective

on that has changed in the

sense that I really do think

that I could make a school my

own and make it meaningful.

Oh my goodness, come on Ian.

Rachael Schmidt.

Sophia Wu.

Alvan Cai.

Like, you have to be

successful in high school,

you have to be successful

in college,

you have to get a good job

that pays a lot of money.

Like I feel like it leaves

like a really important

thing out.

And I think that's happiness.

Ian Wang.

Woo! Ian!

I packed my suitcase a

few days ago.

I'm like super happy.

It honestly can't get

any better, you know.

And I guess like another

really weird fact

is that I was able to do it

and not really have a tiger

mom and stuff.

I guess I'm very fortunate

in that my mom really

cares about me

and she lets me do what I

want to do.

I'm really excited for him

because this is like

such a nice opportunity

that he can leave school

and just live out his dream

and not be weighed down by

anything, Chinese style.

That's all.

No debt.

Undergrads, down the hill.

A couple of days before

we got here,

I was still a bit unsure.

I don't know if this is

gonna make my mom happy.

I don't know if this is like

the one that she really wanted.

Welcome to Brown, 2021!

But I'm excited about Brown

because it's what I chose,

and being happy about it

makes me feel

like I'd made the right choice.

Thank you.

It's beautiful.

I love this bear.

We used to have this

thing where,

because of the divorce I would

cry a lot in K through eight

and so she would tell me,

"You need to stop that you

need to hide your emotions

a bit more or at least not

like show them outwardly."

See, my eyes are watering.

So what's next for you?

Uh, I live life.

I don't know how to answer that.

How does it feel?

It feels great,

but how does it feel?

It feels awful.

So, I'm serious.

It's just, I'm happy that

she has the opportunity

but I'm sad that, she's gone.

You gotta text me when

you land, okay?

Text you every step of

the way, okay.

Oh my gosh, you're crying.

I am not.

Yes you are, it's

okay, it's okay to cry.

I'm gonna miss you.

I'm gonna miss you too mama.

Be strong because that is

what we do.

That's what we do.

It's what we do, girl,

okay, all righty.

Bye mama,

have a safe flight, okay?

Checking in?

Yeah.

- Two o'clock.

- Who's the student?

Here.

Hello?

And what's your name?

A-L-V-A-N.

Last is C-A-I.

You are in building eight.

Thank you, thank you.

What's your name?

Alvan.

Last name C-A-I.

Alvan, okay, I see you.

So you're in eight D 26B.

Alvan.

I think this is my building.

Hello.

What's up bruh?

I live in SF.

So it's like hella close, yeah.

Half an hour away.

San Francisco.

I do value, you know what

my parents have done for me.

I'm actually really grateful,

but you know I have to be

an adult now.

I don't know,

it's kind of like humbling.

Which closet?

I took that one.

And I think there's...

Yeah all right. We good,

we good.

Bye-bye.

Bye.

Bye bye, I love you.

Bye bye.

Bye bye, we'll see each other.

Nice meeting with you.

And then we'll bring you

to San Francisco to have

good dinner or lunch. Bye bye.

Bye, thank you Casper.

Nice to talk with you.

I told him that we can meet

each other as often as he wants.

With the exception of the

occasional anxiety attack.

Today's been okay.

Oh my God!

What the fuck!

No way, no, no, no, no, no.

Are you, Oh my God, no,

no, no, no, no, no way!

No way!

Oh my God!

I got in!

Yes!

Who do I even call?

Who do I call first?

Who do I call?

♪ When I was young, it seemed

that life was so wonderful ♪

♪ A miracle, oh it was

beautiful, magical ♪

♪ And all the birds in

the trees, ♪

♪ Well they'd be singing

so happily ♪

♪ Oh joyfully,

playfully watching me ♪

♪ But then they send me away to

teach me how to be sensible ♪

♪ Logical, oh responsible,

practical ♪

♪ And they showed me a world

where I could be so dependable ♪

♪ Oh clinical, oh intellectual,

cynical ♪

♪ There are times when

all the world's asleep ♪

♪ The questions run too deep

♪ For such a simple man

♪ Won't you please, please

tell me what we've learned ♪

♪ I know it sounds absurd

♪ Please tell me who I am

♪ I said, watch what you say

♪ Or they'll be calling you

a radical ♪

♪ Liberal, oh fanatical,

criminal ♪

♪ Won't you sign up your name,

♪ We'd like to feel you're

acceptable ♪

♪ Respectable, oh

presentable, a vegetable ♪

♪ Mmm, take it take it yeah

♪ But at night, when

all the world's asleep ♪

♪ The questions run so deep

♪ For such a simple man

♪ Won't you please tell

me what we've learned ♪

♪ I know it sounds absurd

♪ Please tell me who I am,

who I am, ♪

♪ Who I am, who I am