Tort(illa) Reform (2006) - full transcript

ALTON BROWN HERE
IN THE MEXICAN RESTAURANT

DOWN THE STREET
FROM YOUR HOUSE.

YOU KNOW THE ONE,
IN THE STRIP MALL,

HAS SOMBREROS ON THE WALL
OVER THE CASH REGISTER.

AND THE TV IN THE BAR
IS ALWAYS TUNED

TO THE SOCCER CHANNEL.

THERE'S A CACTUS
ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE MENU

AND A BUNCH OF NUMBERS
ON THE INSIDE.

OH, AND HERE'S A SHOCKER,
AMERICA,

DELICIOUS THOUGH
THAT NUMBER 16 COMBO MAY BE,

IT'S ABOUT AS
AUTHENTICALLY MEXICAN



AS THE FRITO BANDITO.

THERE IS HOWEVER,
ONE SOLID PIECE

OF MESOAMERICANA HERE,
THE TORTILLA.

INDEED, IT COULD BE ARGUED
THAT BESIDES

BEING A STAPLE FOOD
FOR HALF THE PLANET,

THIS HUMBLE FLAT BREAD
IS ONE OF THE EDIBLE LINCHPINS

OF HUMAN HISTORY.

DELECTABLE THOUGH THEY ARE,

THE AVERAGE GRINGO
WOULD NO MORE ATTEMPT

TO MAKE TORTILLAS AT HOME,
THAN TO TAKE UP FLAMENCO GUITAR.

AND THAT'S A SHAME,
BECAUSE THE TORTILLA

IS A TRULY AMAZING,
HA-HA-HA...

GET IT?

NEVERMIND, THE POINT IS



THE TORTILLA IS
WAY MORE AMERICAN
THAN APPLE PIE.

IT'S HEALTHFUL,
EASY TO CONCOCT,

AND AS VERSATILE
AS VICE GRIPS.

AND THAT, GENTLE VIEWER,
IS MORE THAN ENOUGH

TO QUALIFY IT AS...

¶

GOODBYE,
ADIOS, MARIACHI GUYS.

HEY, GOOD LUCK WITH THOSE
MUSIC LESSONS, BYE.

ACTUALLY,
WHEN I SAID THAT TORTILLAS

ARE ONE OF THE EDIBLE
LINCHPINS OF HISTORY,

WHAT I REALLY SHOULD HAVE SAID,
IS THAT THE DOUGH, OR MASA,

FROM WHICH THEY ARE MADE,
IS A LINCHPIN OF HISTORY.

HOW SO?

WELL, LET US CONSIDER
THE CURIOUS CASE OF CORTEZ.

(Alton)
ONCE UPON A TIME IN 1519,

A CERTAIN SPANISH
BUSINESSMAN/ADVENTURER,

NAMED HERNANDO CORTEZ,
LANDED IN WHAT IS TODAY

VERA CRUZ, MEXICO.

WHY, BECAUSE HE HAD
A SERIOUS HANKERING FOR GOLD,

WHICH HE SOON FOUND HEAPS OF
IN THE AZTEC CITY STATE OF

TENOCHTITLAN,

WHICH WAS,
AT THE TIME,

PROBABLY THE MOST SPLENDID CITY
ON EARTH.

FIGURING HE WOULD BE
A FAR BETTER STEWARD
OF ALL THAT WEALTH,

CORTEZ,
AIDED BY CANONS, HORSES,
SMALLPOX,

AND A LEGEND
THAT MADE HIM OUT TO BE
A RETURNING GOD,

CAPTURED THE CITY'S RULER,
MONTEZUMA,

AND SET ABOUT DECIMATING
ONE OF
THE GREATEST CIVILIZATIONS

OUR PLANET
HAS EVER HOSTED.

HAD CORTEZ STOPPED
FOR JUST A MOMENT

TO CONSIDER JUST HOW IT WAS
THAT SUCH HEATHEN SAVAGES

WERE ABLE TO ERECT
SUCH A BLING-ENCRUSTED
METROPOLIS,

HE MIGHT HAVE DISCOVERED A VERY
DIFFERENT KIND OF GOLD
ALTOGETHER...

MAIZE .

YOU KNOW, THE AVERAGE
MESOAMERICAN DIET
WAS VERY CORNY INDEED,

BUT UNLIKE
THE SWEET FIELD CORN

THAT WE MODERN
NORTH AMERICAN ANGLOS KNOW
AND LOVE.

THE STUFF THE AZTEC
LIVED ON

WAS VERY, VERY STARCHY.

AND IT CAME WITH
A VERY THICK OUTER HULL,
OR PERICARP, OKAY?

NOW PROBABLY,
10,000 YEARS AGO OR SO

BEFORE COLUMBUS SHOWED UP,
THESE EARLY AMERICANS...

THAT IF THEY SOAKED
AND COOKED THE MAIZE

IN WATER
WITH WOOD ASHES IN IT,

THAT THE HULLS
WOULD JUST SLIP RIGHT OFF.

DO YOU NOTICE HOW
I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO THINK

"NUTRITIONAL ANTHROPOLOGIST"
ANYMORE, SHE SHOWS UP?

OKAY, I'LL BITE,
WHAT'S WITH THE WOOD ASHES?

THEY'RE ALKALINE, OF COURSE.

AH, WELL,
THAT CERTAINLY EXPLAINS WHY

LAST SUMMER WHEN I LEFT
ALL THOSE ASHES IN MY GRILL

AND IT RAINED A BUNCH,
THE BOTTOM OF THE GRILL

CORRODED OUT.
I REMEMBER THAT.

BUT TODAY'S MEXICAN COOKS
DON'T USE WOOD ASHES ANYMORE.

THEY USE CAL.

OH, SHORT FOR
CALCIUM HYDROXIDE,

A.K.A. SLAKED LIME,

USED IN
THE CONSTRUCTION BUSINESS
TO HELP CONCRETE HARDEN.

BUT THE REALLY
FASCINATING THING ABOUT IT WAS,

THAT THE MESOAMERICANS THOUGHT
THAT THEY WERE JUST REMOVING
THE PERICARP.

BUT WHAT THEY
WERE ACTUALLY DOING

WAS SETTING IN MOTION

THIS MIRACULOUS
AND AMAZING PHENOMENON.

I SURE HOPE YOU'RE
NOT ABOUT TO LAUNCH INTO ONE

OF YOUR LONG SOLILOQUIES
WITHOUT THE BENEFIT
OF A VISUAL AID.

WELL, CHECK THIS OUT THEN.

OKAY.

WOW, WHAT A SWEET
VISUAL METAPHOR,

REPRESENTING THE MANY NUTRIENTS
LOCKED AWAY INSIDE
A KERNEL OF CORN.

I THINK I'LL HAVE
A LITTLE PROLINE.

HEY, WHAT GIVES,
I CAN'T GET ANY OF THEM OUT?

NIXTAMALIZATION IS LIKE
A CHEMICAL KEY

THAT UNLOCKS ALL
THE WONDERFUL NUTRIENTS

THAT ARE LOCKED INSIDE
A KERNEL OF MAIZE.

SO WHAT KIND OF NUTRIENTS
ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HERE?

WELL, FOR ONE THING,

AMINO ACIDS LIKE LYSINE
AND TRYPTOPHAN.

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY,
VITAMIN B-3,

BETTER KNOWN AS NIACIN.

NOW IF THE AZTECS
HADN'T HAD NIXTAMALIZATION,

THEY WOULDN'T HAVE HAD
THE ENERGY

TO BUILD THAT MAGNIFICENT EMPIRE
OF THEIRS.

AND ONCE CORTEZ SHOWED UP,

HE PROBABLY WOULDN'T HAVE PAID
VERY MUCH ATTENTION TO THEM.

HE CERTAINLY HAD NO REASON
TO DESTROY THEIR EMPIRE
LIKE HE DID.

GOT IT.

BUT IN A WAY,
THEY GOT THEIR REVENGE,

BECAUSE WHEN CORTEZ
AND THE OTHER CONQUISTADORS,

BROUGHT MAIZE BACK
TO THE OLD WORLD,

THEY DIDN'T TAKE
NIXTAMALIZATION.

SO THE COUNTRIES AND PEOPLES

THAT ADOPTED CORN
AS THEIR MAIN GRAIN,

SOON SUFFERED
FROM A TERRIBLE DISEASE

OF MALNUTRITION CALLED,
PELLAGRA.

WHAT'S PELLAGRA DO?

UH, THE THREE DREADED "D's,"

DIARRHEA, DEMENTIA,
AND DEATH.

WELL, I GUESS THAT'S

MONTEZUMA'S REAL REVENGE.

NOW LET'S PRETEND,
FOR JUST A MOMENT

THAT YOU REALLY WANT
TO MAKE TORTILLAS FROM SCRATCH.

FIRST, YOU'D HAVE TO MAKE
NIXTAMAL

FROM SAY, 1 POUND,
ABOUT 2 CUPS

OF DRY FIELD OR FLINT CORN,

WHICH CAN BE FOUND
AT HEALTH FOOD STORES, CO-OPS,

AND OF COURSE,
THAT NEW FANGLED

WORLD WIDE WEB
INFORMATION SUPER HIGHWAY.

ANYWAY FIRST STEP,

WASH THE CORN THOROUGHLY

IN THE SINK.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SOAK IT,
YOU JUST WANT TO KIND OF
KNOCK ALL THE DUST OFF.

AND MOVE IT TO
A STAINLESS STEEL POT,

LARGE ENOUGH
TO HOLD THE CORN

PLUS 6 CUPS OF WATER

AND 1/2 OUNCE,
ABOUT 2 TABLESPOONS

OF CALCIUM HYDROXIDE.

CANNERS CALL THIS
PICKLING LIME.

BUILDERS CALL IT
SLAKED LIME.

MEXICAN COOKS CALL IT
CAL,

WHICH I THINK IS
A FAR, FAR NICER NAME.

YOU CAN GET IT
ON THE INTERNET QUITE EASILY.

YOU'RE GOING TO BRING THIS
SLOWLY TO A BOIL.

YOU WANT IT TO TAKE

ABOUT 30 TO 40 MINUTES.

AND IT IS VERY IMPORTANT
THAT YOU USE

A STAINLESS STEEL VESSEL
AND A STAINLESS STEEL SPOON,

BECAUSE THE CAL
CAN DISCOLOR METALS,

AND IT CAN BLEACH OUT WOOD.

SO STEEL, GOT IT?

WHEN YOUR CORN HITS A BOIL,
COVER THE POT.

KILL THE HEAT, OF COURSE,
AND STASH THE POT

SOME PLACE OUT OF THE WAY,
OVERNIGHT.

AND DO NOT PUT IT
IN THE REFRIGERATOR,

BECAUSE COLD WILL SHUT DOWN
THE CHEMICAL REACTIONS

THAT WE ARE COUNTING ON
TAKING PLACE HERE.

SEE YOU IN THE MORNING.

¶

AS YOU CAN SEE
BY MY NEW SHIRT,
THIS IS THE NEXT DAY.

AND YOU CAN ALSO SEE
THAT OUR LIME SOLUTION

HAS DEFINITELY

LOOSENED UP THE HULL
ON OUR MAIZE.

BUT YOU WILL
STILL HAVE TO APPLY

A LITTLE MECHANICAL
ENCOURAGEMENT.

I USUALLY RUB THE KERNELS
UNDER RUNNING LUKEWARM WATER

FOR FIVE TO SIX MINUTES.

AFTER THAT, YOU'LL STILL WANT
TO REMOVE THE LIME
RESIDUAL FLAVOR,

SO GIVE IT A SOAK
IN CLEAN WATER
FOR ABOUT TWO MINUTES,

CHANGE THE WATER
AND SOAK IT FOR ANOTHER TWO.

THEN, AND ONLY THEN,
MAY YOU CONSIDER
THE GRINDING PROCESS.

LET'S SEE, BLENDER,
NOT FINE ENOUGH.

GRAIN MILL, FINE ENOUGH,
BUT IT CAN'T HANDLE
THE MOISTURE.

MEAT GRINDER ATTACHMENT
ON THE MIXER

CAN HANDLE THE MOISTURE,
BUT THEN AGAIN,
IT'S NOT FINE ENOUGH.

UH, COFFEE GRINDER,
BAD IDEA.

FOOD PROCESSOR,

THERE'S DEFINITELY
SOME POTENTIAL THERE.

BUT YOU KNOW, ANY REAL
SELF-RESPECTING MASA MASTER

WOULD BY-PASS
SUCH MODERN MARVELS

IN FAVOR OF EL METATE Y MANO .

THERE IT IS,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

THIS BEAUTIFUL ENGINE
OF MASA DESTRUCTION,

CARVED OUT OF TWO BLOCKS
OF SOLID LAVA ROCK

IS THE FINAL WORD
IN CORN GRINDING.

DOES IT TAKE A LOT
OF BACK-BREAKING LABOR,

JUST TO MANUFACTURE
ENOUGH DOUGH

TO HAVE TORTILLAS
FOR A SMALL FAMILY, YES!!

BUT THE PURIST IN ME SAYS,
"YOU'VE GOTTA DO
WHAT YOU'VE GOTTA DO."

MEANWHILE, THE KIND OF LAZY
AMERICAN MALE IN ME SAYS,

"HEY, MAYBE WE SHOULD TRY
THE FOOD PROCESSOR AGAIN."

SHIFT YOUR NIXTAMAL'S LOCATION

TO THE WORK BOWL
OF YOUR FOOD PROCESSOR.

AND BASICALLY,
JUST PULSE

UH, 10 TO 15 TIMES

FOR STARTERS.

THEN JUST SCRAPE DOWN
THE BOWL A BIT,

JUST TO MIX THINGS UP.

AND ADD
ABOUT 2 TABLESPOONS

OF WATER.

AND PROCESS AGAIN,
SAY, 8 TO 10 TIMES.

NOW WE WILL ADD

ANOTHER 2 TABLESPOONS
OF WATER.

AND TIME FOR
A LITTLE BIT OF SALT,

ONE TEASPOON OF KOSHER
SHOULD DO THE JOB.

DO NOT LEAVE THIS OUT,
OR YOUR TORTILLAS

WILL DEFINITELY TASTE
A LITTLE ON THE DEAD SIDE.

AND THAT GOES IN.

AND PULSE UNTIL
THE DOUGH COMES TOGETHER.

THERE, JUST CHECK THE DOUGH,
JUST GRAB A LITTLE HANDFUL.

THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE.

SO WE WILL REMOVE THIS
TO OUR FAVORITE WORK BOWL.

CAREFULLY EXTRACTING
THE BLADE, OF COURSE.

AND WE'LL KNEAD THAT
INTO A WEE BALL.

IF YOUR DOUGH
DOESN'T WANT TO FORM
A NICE LITTLE BALL,

JUST KNEAD IN
ANOTHER TABLESPOON OR TWO
OF WATER

AND IT WILL COME AROUND.

NOW IT'S IMPORTANT
THAT YOU WRAP THIS IN PLASTIC

AND LET IT SIT
ON YOUR COUNTER FOR 1/2 HOUR,

BEFORE YOU START
MAKING TORTILLAS,

BECAUSE THE DOUGH
HAS GOT TO ABSORB THAT WATER.

SO 1/2 HOUR,
NO MORE AND NO LESS.

THERE, NOW IF THIS STILL SEEMS
LIKE TOO MUCH WORK FOR YOU,

MOST MEGA-MARTS CARRY

DEHYDRATED GROUND MASA,

WHICH CAN SIMPLY BE
MIXED WITH WATER

TO CREATE THE DOUGH
THAT WE DESIRE.

OF COURSE, DEPENDING UPON
WHERE YOU LIVE,

YOU MAY HAVE
AN EVEN BETTER OPTION.

EXCUSE ME.

ALTHOUGH TRADITIONALLY CRAFTED
CORN TORTILLAS
ARE UNDENIABLY DELICIOUS,

THEY ARE ALSO VERY PERISHABLE,

ERGO, THEY SHIP POORLY.

AND THAT'S GOOD,
BECAUSE JUST ABOUT

EVERY CITY AND LARGE TOWN
IN THE UNITED STATES

WITH A LATIN AMERICAN
COMMUNITY,

HAS A TORTILLA PLANT
JUST LIKE THIS.

NOW BESIDES OFFERING
TRULY GREAT TORTILLAS,

WHICH I MIGHT ADD,
FREEZE FABULOUSLY
LEFT IN THE BAG

AND THEN DOUBLE-WRAPPED
IN ALUMINUM FOIL.

MOST FACTORIES
ARE MORE THAN HAPPY

TO SELL YOU ALL THE MAIZE,
CAL,

NIXTAMAL OR MASA DOUGH
THAT YOU NEED,

TO MAKE YOUR OWN TORTILLAS
AT HOME.

NOW I DON'T HAVE SPACE

FOR A TORTILLA MASTER 6,000,
LIKE THIS AT MY HOUSE.

SO I WILL REQUIRE
THE SERVICES

OF AN ANCIENT
MANGLING DEVICE CALLED,

A TORTILLADORA.

WHERE WILL I BE ABLE
TO GET SUCH A DEVICE?

WELL, I SHOULD THINK
ANY WELL STOCKED DUNGEON

SHOULD DO.

¶

HELLO, DUNGEON MASTER.

ANYBODY HOME?

RUBBER CHICKENS?

HELLO, ANYBODY HOME?

GREETINGS, MASTER.

HOW MAY I SERVE
YOUR IMPUDENCE?

UH, I NEED
A TORTILLA PRESS.

AH, WANT TO PUT
A LITTLE SQUEEZE ON SOMETHING,
EH?

TORTILLAS.

RIGHT, TORTILLAS,
SAY NO MORE, MASTER.

LOOK, IF THIS IS GONNA BE
SOME BIG HASSLE,

I'LL JUST GO
TO A KITCHENWARE STORE.

THAT'S RICH,
COME THIS WAY.

GOOD MASTER WISH
TO MASHY MASHY SOMETHING UP
A LITTLE OLD-SCHOOL.

PLEASE.

HERE WE HAVE
A TRADITIONAL WOODEN PRESS.

THE VICTIM, WHATEVER,
GOES IN HERE.

THEN THIS SLAB COMES DOWN

AND THE HANDLE APPLIES
THE PRESSURE.

WHAT ELSE IS IT GOOD FOR?

OTHER THAN ELICITING
CONFESSIONS, IT'S JUST GOOD,
CLEAN, FUN.

HAVE ANYTHING A LITTLE MORE
20th-CENTURY?

YES, HERE WE HAVE
AN ELECTRIC MODEL.

THIS ONE PRESSES AND COOKS

AT THE SAME TIME.

THE ONLY THING
THIS BABY'S MISSING

IS SPIKES.

THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING.

UH, A LITTLE TOO SPECIALIZED.

ANYTHING, I DON'T KNOW,
19th-CENTURY?

OH YES, HERE WE HAVE
A COUPLE OF METAL PRESSES,

ONE IN ALUMINUM,
THE OTHER ONE IN IRON.

THE ALUMINUM ONE
IS NICE AND LIGHT.

BUT NOT HEAVY ENOUGH

TO INFLICT SERIOUS DAMAGE,

NOT LIKE OUR
IRON FRIEND HERE.

WHAT'S WITH
THE FUNNY PAINT JOB?

OH, MERELY
A PROTECTIVE COATING.

I MIGHT ALSO POINT OUT,
THIS ONE COMES
IN A BIGGER MODEL,

IF GOOD MASTER WISHES
TO MASHY SOMETHING
A LITTLE LARGER.

LIKE, MAYBE A FLOUR TORTILLA
FOR A QUESADILLA.

OR A MADAGASCAR COCKROACH.

SLAM, GAH!!!

I GOTTA GO.
OH, VERY WELL,
THANKS FOR COMING DOWN.

OH YEAH.
DROP IN ANYTIME.

SURE THING, BUDDY.

¶

WELL, A LITTLE MATH REVEALS THAT
1.5 OUNCES WOULD BE

THE APPROPRIATE MASS
FOR EACH OF THESE TORTILLAS,

GIVEN THE SIZE OF OUR PRESS,
AND THE SIZE
OF OUR BATCH OF DOUGH.

SO I'M JUST GONNA USE

THE 1-1/2-OUNCE SCOOPER

TO APPROXIMATE THAT.

AND LAY IT OUT
ON MY SCALE.

WELL, 1.55,
THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH.

JUST ROLL THEM UP,
ALMOST LIKE LITTLE
WEDDING COOKIES,

AND STASH UNDER
A NICE, MOIST TOWELETTE.

NOW BEFORE WE CAN
ACTUALLY GET TO PRESSING,

WE NEED TO MAKE SURE
THE REST OF OUR TORTILLA STATION

IS SET UP AND READY.

UH, WE HAVE HERE
FOR INSTANCE, THE HOT ZONE.

NOW TRADITIONALLY IN MEXICO,

THE TORTILLAS ARE COOKED
ON A SPECIAL

EITHER EARTHENWARE
OR THIN, CAST IRON GRIDDLE,

CALLED A COMALL, OR COMAL,
DEPENDING UPON WHERE YOU ARE.

I'M JUST USING
A HEAVY-DUTY GRIDDLE
THAT I HAVE.

THIS ONE'S CAST IRON,
WHICH I LIKE.

WHAT'S IMPORTANT
IS THAT YOU PLACE IT OVER HEAT

THAT WILL ALLOW YOU
TO MAINTAIN

ABOUT 400 DEGREES,
THAT'S OUR KEY TEMPERATURE.

AND THE EASIEST WAY
TO FIGURE THAT, OF COURSE,

IS ONE OF THESE SNAZZY
INFRARED THERMOMETERS.

IF YOU DON'T HAVE ONE,
JUST REMEMBER,

THAT A DROP OF WATER
LOOKS LIKE THIS
ON A 400-DEGREE GRIDDLE.

YOU WANT TO SEE THAT AGAIN?

THAT'S IT.

UH, NOW WE'VE GOT OUR HOT ZONE.

MOVING ON OVER
WE HAVE OUR LANDING PAD.

BASICALLY A TEA TOWEL
THAT WILL KEEP OUR TORTILLAS
NICE AND WARM.

OF COURSE, I'VE GOT MINE

ON TOP OF A HEATING PAD
SET ON HIGH.

DO THIS, AND PEOPLE WILL
CALL YOU A GEEK.

PERSONALLY,
I'M OKAY WITH THAT.

LET'S GET TO PRESSING MATTERS,
SHALL WE?

OKAY, HERE WE HAVE
OUR PRESS,

AS SEEN BEFORE.

OF COURSE, THIS SURFACE,
THAT PAINT,

IS STRICTLY FOR PROTECTING
THE METAL.

IT'S NOT GONNA DO MUCH
FOR THE TORTILLAS.

SO I'M GONNA LINE THIS
WITH SOME PLASTIC.

NOW THIS IS JUST
A ZIP TOP BAG

THAT I'VE CUT
THE SIDES OUT OF.

AND OF COURSE, THE ZIP PART
IS GONE,
SO PLACE THAT INSIDE.

GRAB ONE OF YOUR DOUGH BALLS
AND PLACE THUSLY.

NOTICE I'M NOT PUTTING IT
DEAD CENTER.

I'M PRESSING IT
JUST OFF TO THE SIDE,

NEAR THE HINGE.

LAY OVER THE PLASTIC,
KIND OF PRESS IT OUT
WITH YOUR HAND.

THERE WE GO.

AND THEN GENTLY

APPLY THE PRESSURE.

JUST GIVE IT A SQUEEZE
ALL THE WAY DOWN,

AS FAR AS IT WILL GO.

AND YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF
ONE LOVELY TORTILLA.

NOW THESE ARE
RATHER FRAGILE,

SO PEEL THE PLASTIC OFF
THAT WAY.

AND PUT OVER YOUR HAND

AND LAY IT OVER.

NOW WE TRANSFER
TO THE HEAT.

THERE WE GO, WE'LL GO HERE.

THERE, NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN
RIGHT AWAY.

BUT IT'S ONLY GONNA COOK

ABOUT A MINUTE PER SIDE.

A LITTLE JAGGED EXTERIOR THERE

IS NOT A BAD THING.

IT'S A HOMEMADE TORTILLA,
BUT IF YOU HAVE

ANY REAL DEEP CRACKS
AROUND THE OUTSIDE,

IT COULD BE A SIGN
THAT YOUR DOUGH
IS A LITTLE TOO DRY.

YOU MIGHT WANT TO KNEAD IN
A LITTLE WATER

AND TRY AGAIN AFTER

ALLOWING THE DOUGH
TO REST FOR A WHILE.

YOU KNOW THAT THE TORTILLA
IS STARTING TO COOK,

WHEN YOU START TO SEE STEAM
COME OUT OF IT,

AS THE MOISTURE
INSIDE THE TORTILLA
IS BOILING AWAY.

AND THAT'S SOMETHING GOOD,
THAT'S NOT SMOKE, THAT'S STEAM.

THE GOAL HERE, OF COURSE,
IS TO BE ABLE TO COOK

TWO TORTILLAS AT ONE TIME,

WHILE YOU'RE BUSY
PRESSING THE OTHERS,

BUT IT WILL TAKE
A LITTLE PRACTICE.

JUST WORK IN YOUR TONG
AND GIVE IT A FLIP.

YOU SEE, THERE'S JUST A COUPLE
OF BLACKENED AREAS

WHERE THE LARGER PIECES OF CORN

HAVE SLIGHTLY BURNED,
THAT'S OKAY.

¶

ALTHOUGH TRUE TORTILLIACS
WILL TESTIFY TO THE FACT THAT

A GOOD TORTILLA
NEEDS A LITTLE MORE

THAN SOME SALT
AND PERHAPS SOME BUTTER
TO REACH PERFECTION.

THE SUCCESS OF THE TACO
WOULD SUGGEST THAT

THE SHAPE
AND THE HAND-FRIENDLY SIZE
OF THE TORTILLA,

WOULD MAKE IT
A PERFECT DELIVERY DEVICE

FOR AN INFINITE NUMBER
OF GOODS,

FROM THE TRADITIONAL
SHREDDED MEAT AND BEANS,

TO MY FAVORITE,
FRIED ANCHOVIES AND MAYONNAISE
WITH HOT SAUCE.

HEY DEB,
WHAT DID YOU BRING?

WELL, TORTILLAS
ARE PERFECT WRAPPERS
FOR THESE CHAPOLINES .

CHAPOLINES,
WHAT'S THAT PREY TELL?

FRIED GRASSHOPPERS
WITH CHILI POWDER,

AND I BROUGHT
A WHOLE BOWL OF THEM, TOO,
HAVE SOME.

WELL, IT'S OUR LUCKY DAY.

YOU KNOW, SINCE
FRESH TORTILLAS DON'T HAVE
ANY PRESERVATIVES IN THEM,

THEY WILL GO STALE
RELATIVELY QUICKLY.

BUT DON'T DESPAIR.

OH NO,
YOU GUYS HAVE THEM.

STALE TORTILLAS,
NO PROBLEM,

JUST GRAB YOUR
HANDY DANDY SPRITZER

(growl)

AND GIVE THEM A SPRITZ
ON ONE SIDE,

A SPRITZ ON
THE SECOND SIDE.

GIVE THEM A LITTLE RUB
AND JUST STACK THEM UP,

AND MOVE THEM DOWN

TO A 300-DEGREE OVEN

FOR JUST A FEW MINUTES
UNTIL THEY WARM UP.

OF COURSE, THIS HAS ALL BEEN
PRETTY NIFTY.

BUT THE MOST SERIOUS

AND SPECIAL TOP SECRET
TORTILLA TRICK OF ALL TIME

IS YET TO COME.

¶

SUBMITTED FOR YOUR APPROVAL,

ONE POUND OF HOMEMADE TORTILLAS.

COST,
ABOUT 15 CENTS.

NEXT, WE HAVE ABOUT 1 POUND
OF STORE-BOUGHT,

BUT FRESH,
LOCALLY MADE TORTILLAS.

COST, ABOUT A BUCK.

THEN WE HAVE 1 POUND

OF JOE'S RESTAURANT-STYLE
TORTILLA CHIPS.

PRICE,
ABOUT $3.80.

WHY THE DISCREPANCY?

WELL, IT'S SURE NOT
THE CHIPS.

AND IT'S PROBABLY NOT

THE COST OF THIS
BABY-SEAL-CHOKING
PLASTIC BAG.

GOSH, IT MUST BE

THE STUNNING DISPLAY
OF MARKETING CRAFTS.

I THINK THAT'S
A BIG RIP-OFF.

AND WHAT'S WORSE IS
BY THE TIME THIS GETS
TO YOUR HOME...

THE CHIPS LOOK LIKE THAT.

IT'S JUST NOT RIGHT,
I TELL YOU.

LUCKILY, THERE'S SOMETHING
WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.

(Alton) START BY CAREFULLY
APPROACHING TEN STACKED FRESH
TORTILLAS,

EITHER HOMEMADE
OR STORE-BOUGHT IF YOU WISH.

AND CUT THEM INTO QUARTERS,
THUSLY.

NOW ORDINARILY,
FOLKS WOULD JUST FRY THESE.

BUT I DON'T SEE WHY
WE CAN'T ADD
A LITTLE BIT OF FLAVOR.

FOR INSTANCE,
IF YOU WERE TO MIX
2 TEASPOONS OF KOSHER SALT

WITH 1/4 CUP
OF FRESHLY SQUEEZED LIME JUICE,

AND JUST WHISK THAT UP.

WELL, HECK,
YOU'D PROBABLY HAVE A SOLUTION
THAT WAS VERY, VERY SALTY

AND VERY, VERY TART.

IF IT TASTES REALLY BAD,
THEN IT'S PROBABLY

A PERFECT MARINADE
FOR THESE CHIPS.

JUST TAKE YOUR PIECES
OF TORTILLA,

DUNK THEM AND LET THEM DRY
ON A RACK FOR ABOUT AN HOUR,

BEFORE YOU FRY THEM UP

IN 365 TO 375-DEGREE OIL.

THEY'LL COOK FOR
20 TO 30 SECONDS.

TAKE THEM OUT
WHEN THEY FLOAT UP
ON TOP OF THE OIL,

OR WHEN THEY START
TO TURN BLACK AROUND THE EDGES.

WELL, THERE YOU HAVE IT KIDS,

CRISP YET MEATY,
DELICIOUS SALTY LIME TORTILLAS

CONTAINING NO CHEMICALS,

WELL, OTHER THAN
SODIUM CHLORIDE.

NO PRESERVATIVES,
NO ARTIFICIAL ANYTHING,

AND THEY ONLY COST,
I DON'T KNOW,
A CENT AND A HALF TO MAKE.

AND NOTE THIS --

THEY HOLD CHUNKY SALSAS
AND WEIGHTY GUACAMOLES

BETTER THAN STORE-BOUGHT,

WHICH NEED NEVER DARKEN
YOUR KITCHEN DOOR AGAIN.

HEY ALTON, THOSE MARIACHIS,
THEY REMEMBERED THEY HAD

THIS BAR MITZVAH TO PLAY.

THEY DIDN'T GET TO EAT
THEIR TACOS.

SO ANYWAY, ENJOY,
BON APPETITE,

AND ADIOS.

YEAH, ADIOS,
BAR MITZVAH, HUH?

WELL, I GUESS IT'S JUST
MY LUCKY DAY.

HERE'S TO TAKING TORTILLAS
INTO YOUR OWN HANDS.

NOT ONLY ARE THEY
A FASCINATING LINK

TO OUR TRUE
AMERICAN HERITAGE,

THEY'RE DELICIOUS, FUN,

FUNCTIONAL,

AND GOOD EATS.

Captioned by
Scripps Networks, Inc.